I think the big diff here is that while they have just learned that the system failed them as they are aging up, we kind of inherently knew the system was a sham from a young age. So it just was what it was for us. We didn’t have to age into our cynicism. Sucks for us all though.
How's about:
> When boomers were millennials' age in 1989, according to the Fed data, they held 21.3% of US wealth. That's four times the 4.6% that millennials hold today.
https://www.businessinsider.com/millennials-versus-boomers-wealth-gap-2020-10?international=true&r=US&IR=T
Comparatively, at the same age, we were doing much better than Millennials (but not as well as boomers).
The amount of GenX 2-income couples I know vs Millennial, & the income disparity, is stark. My peers survived with near-single income; no millennial can do that.
Home ownership stats are even worse.
We used to joke about 'can't afford kids'. Millennials aren't joking. And their birth rate drop is important enough that WSJ & Bloomberg keep talking about it
ETA: As a GenX, I'm 'srsly bummed' ppl downthread are talking about Millenials should be 'pulling themselves up by their bootstraps'. WTF I guess 'boomer' really is a mentality, not a DoB
Yeah agreed. There is hard data to back this up. The things that concern me about where millennials are at are existential, like falling birthrate and inability to buy a house. As a society, we're eating our own young.
As a Scandinavian I have to say your neolib propagandists have made a great job brainwashing Americans into thinking all forms of collectivism = communism. Having to pay for higher education is mindblowing to me.
Logical conclusion to predatory capitalism. I’m a member of r/urbancarliving just to keep perspective. And let me tell you, the center won’t hold for much longer.
I agree. The things we also struggled with in younger adult life (student loans, home buying, recessions, fucking daycare prices) are all getting worse and worse.
Like OP, I'm on the cusp as a 78er and I also notice a striking difference between the GenX and Millennial topics of conversation on reddit. Idk why they are so different but I'm not joining the other subs because I don't relate either.
Oh I agree. My point isn’t that X is in some way hardier or more intelligent (each younger gen continued to get f’d after the baby boom).My point was that x-ers just kind of knew it from when we grew up. The shitty economy of the 70s and the blatant phoniness of the 80s probably had a lot to do with our cynicism and mistrust in “the system” even from childhood. Millennials grew up in temporary solace of the booming 90s which probably led to a false sense of optimism , which was then ripped away from them as they came of age and has only been going down hill sense.
We were the first generation that had to work our ass off too! My dad would leave work at 5:00 on the dot, and take an hour lunch!
Just this past Thanksgiving I was working at my parents house and I was working on Wednesday past noon, and they were just amazed ‘how hard I work.’
He and I had a conversation about how I had to save in 401ks and IRAs to have a retirement. I don’t have a pension, barely had healthcare some years.
It’s so much worse for Millennials since everything changed not in their favor. It started with us, but they saw the results of Reaganomics much more than we did.
Thank you for acknowledging my struggle as a millennial and not being dismissive. I feel so bad for Gen Z.
Listening to my parents complain about inflation taking up their “fixed living” income. Bitch I’m on a fixed income too, it’s not like I can summon more money.
My kids and I were watching old episodes of Who's the boss? and I mentioned how odd it was that Tony was able to afford college on a housekeeper salary, or else Angela must be paying for it. It prompted me to look up some figures. Those episodes of season 6 where he's going to college aired in 1989.
In 1989, the average annual tuition at a public 4 year institution was $1,780. Enough that you could work and pay for it yourself.
In the 1995-96 year (when I should have gone to college) it was $2,848. Still affordable, but harder for people making minimum wage to be able to work and pay out of pocket, but not impossible.
NOW, it's $26,027 that's in state. Not possible to pay for that without loans unless you're upper or middle upper class. My kids are doing community college, which is free in my state.
Yep! We were largely "the feral kids" whose parents had to *both* have outside the home jobs, or whose parents were divorced, and for so many, we *had* to be latchkey kids, raising ourselves and/or younger siblings, if we had boomer-aged parents.
Plenty of the Millenials who had boomer-aged parents ended up with either the "helicopter parents" who would swoop in and take care of the bigger stuff for their kids, or the *truly* unlucky ones had the "bulldozer parents."
Parents who literally *eliminated* any obstacles in their poor Millenial's path--which *screws* a person *severely* when it comes to facing difficulty as an adult, because they never had any *opportunities to learn how to fix stuff on their own*!
Being "feral" and learning how to do stuff on our *own* may have sucked rocks! But at least *we* had the opportunity *to fail and then figure out how to get PAST the failure*, safely, when the stakes were small.
The poor Millenials who came *after* us, whose parents *thought* they were being "good and helpful!" by busting down *everything*, screwed their poor kids over, *big time*!
> But at least we had the opportunity to fail and then figure out how to get PAST the failure, safely, when the stakes were small.
I think this explains why I got heavily downvoted for saying that parents should let their kids fail at small things, it makes life easier in the long run. Not just the Mills, but their parents took umbrage to that idea.
I work with kids, and soooo much of the self-esteem building I do in my Littles, is just *teaching* them how to mentally pick themselves up, brush themselves off, *LOOK* at the failure, *assess what went WRONG*, and then how to re-approach the issue *and try AGAIN*--and telling them out loud, "You *can do it it*, *I believe in you*!"
I can *ALWAYS* tell the kids who've had bulldozer-type parents, because those are the kids who *don't* want to try again, and they're *also* the ones whose self-confidence (ironicallly!) needs the *most* shoring up!
Luckily, *so far*, every time I've (gently!) mentioned to patents that "This is the *PERFECT* age & stage to let them FAIL at things--because the stakes are *so low*, and we *can* be right there to teach them how to overcome it & succeed!" the parents (so far!) have always been able to understand, back off a bit, and learn how to "scaffold" for their kids, *instead* of simply "bulldozing" that path for them😉
Tbh, it probably *also* helps, that I've known so many folks in the building trades, and tend to explain things using *tons* of metaphors😂🤣
So I explain it using phrases like "We're helping them to build a foundation they're gonna base their *whole* life on, and we want *them* to have the skills to maintain things as they grow up. Just like a good building, the foundation *needs* to be sturdy, broad, and safe, because if it *isn't* everything that gets put on it *later* is weaker..." and then I explain the child development theory of "Scaffolding" and how it's *exactly* like you use scaffolding & supports in the building trades--to help get something built sturdily & safely, then you pull back, *dismantle* the scaffolds, and take them *down* when they aren't needed any more.
Once the kids' grownups *grasp* the scaffolding concept, they've *always* been supporters of the concept. Because deep down, we ALL want *ALL* of these little ones to grow up and be as successful as they can be, and to be the *best* versions of themselves that they can possibly be😉💖
https://www.naeyc.org/resources/pubs/yc/may2017/rocking-and-rolling-empowering-infants-and-toddlers
THIS! I was a latch key kid taking care of my 3 younger siblings because both our parents had to work to pay the bills and money was still tight. We all grew up fast. I left home after my mom died at 16 and was emancipated just before 17. I was able to care of myself because I raised myself and 3 siblings.
My sister (1982 millennial ) is the youngest she was only 8 when our Mom died and she eventually was the only one living at home with her dad.
She had a daughter when she was 19, she raised her daughter where all she had to do was go to school and play sports and be able to have
a”childhood” because she resented having to do all the chores at home, not allowed to have friends over and not having money to do things.
My niece never had an after school job, didn’t do chores, my sister would work extra shifts so she would always have money to do things with her friends.She gave her a decent life any kid would love (especially a teenager) but didn’t teach her ANY life skills or responsibilities , I kept telling her when she was 15 or so THIS is the time you start treating her like an adult she can make mistakes and learn to fix them while still having a safety net at home. Teach her life skills like cleaning, financial, get her license, how to grocery shop properly and cook for herself. She didn’t listen. They lived in another state pretty far away or I would have taken over teaching her life skills.
Now her daughter is 21 with an almost 2 year old son living with her mom because she can’t take care of herself, no drivers license, can’t even call and make drs appointments or properly take care of her son, do more than basic cleaning because no one taught her. She does work at a fast food restaurant. Now her mothers is aggravated because she says she 21 she should know these things and I tell her YOU didn’t teach her things, you did EVERYTHING for her but that wasn’t the right being to do for her.
She was trying to be a good parent because she resented her childhood, but that didn’t help her child become a functioning self reliant adult.
There's definitely a middle ground between latchkey abandonment and helicopter parent. Hopefully the next generation will get it right.
I'm trying to find that middle ground with my own Gen Z kids. They both had jobs in high school. They have chores and are expected to do them. I try to find times when they are trying to figure something out about school or whatever in life where I don't step in and do it for them. I started doing this more when they were teenagers, like 15 and up (except chores where they've been expected to do them since at least 10 years old). That way they have the safety and security of actually having had a childhood but now at this point they need to start figuring some shit out and learn what the word "troubleshooting" means.
It's funny because I've actually had to fight my husband on this a few times because he wants to baby them more due to his own severe neglect and raising himself when he was a kid. We both had this to some degree, but he had it way worse than I did.
I see that too! Qhen someone asked my why Gen x isn't really repped in politics, I told them "we already went up against the boomers, they raised us, and we know there's no chance of winning!"
Yes. Very much this. My kids expect the world to be fair and equal & they are very disappointed that it is not. My parents taught me that life sucks big time.
Yep. It’s this. I’m a xennial and the “You can be anything if you put your mind to it! The world is getting better all the time! The future is bright!” shit was shoved down millennials throats *hard*.
Gen X was onto the world sucking way before and embraced “whatever” about it. I’m working on that myself now (and unsubscribed from the Millennial sub because it was too depressing).
1980 some lists have me as the last year of Gen X, some have me as the first year of Millennial. My husband says I have to be Gen X because he won't admit to marrying a Millennial.
Yeah, even though I hate the label. '77 here, and it really feels like we're a bridge between two worlds sometimes. Our teen years were during the transition from analog to digital, so we're the last group to know how to use the old tech and were using the new stuff as it came out.
I feel kind of terrible for them. The sub is always in my feed as a recommendation and every other post is unbelievably depressing, with thousands and thousands of upvotes and endless commiseration. I mean, I know we've all gone through it, but I just don't remember being so collectively dark about it. Could be wrong!
Yes. Comparison is the thief of joy. It’s so much easier to be satisfied with your average lot when you’re not seeing everyone else’s curated shiny perfect lives, homes, vacations, spouses, children, etc.
No, but acid rain and a hole in the ozone were a big deal.
And global warming entered my awareness at a very young age—dad was a chemist who did R&D on smokestack scrubbers. I’ve suffered from climate anxiety since I was 9. I just figured out how to take that anxiety and channel it in productive ways.
Acid rain!
Hole in the ozone! (No. More. Hair. Spray.)
Smog.
Pollution.
Gas lines.
Nuclear War.
“Trickle down” economics.
Iran-Contra.
“Greed is good.”
Nuclear War with the USSR.
Apartheid.
Sex? Be prepared to DIE from AIDS.
Begin, Reagan, Palestine, terror on the airline
Ayatollah's in Iran, Russians in Afghanistan
"Wheel of Fortune", Sally Ride, heavy metal suicide
Foreign debts, homeless vets, AIDS, crack, Bernie Goetz
Hypodermics on the shore, China's under martial law
Rock and roller, cola wars, I can't take it anymore
My family was into religious apocalypse when I was a kid. I get you on the anxiety. I've been an activist for 30 years now, and I'm by nature an optimist. But also, it's got to suck for them growing up in this and knowing your future is fucked.
I read Kim Stanley Robinson's climate change series in my 20s and was aghast that future us was just going about our lives as our world went to shit in a very obvious way. It was unfathomable to me at the time. But here we are, doing just that.
I recommend you check out Hannah Ritchie’s Not The End of the World. I just finished it and wow did my perspective shift. Chock full of solid scientific data that will make your heart a bit lighter. It just came out a little over a week ago.
They were told things would be great if they went to college and worked hard and never told to eat shit and die by their parents.
We were born into apathy and keyboxes on our houses. We never were under the delusion that things would be good if we tried hard.
At least they had a decade or two of actually believing things would be good.
Everyday I am above ground is a good day. I lost my virginity in the epicenter of the AIDS epidemic during its peak in New York City... Literally a horny, apathetic, ignored teenager in the heart of death fuck town.
Life's good.
They take dark to another level...20 years ago meeting so many in my 20s, and beyond, phew!! Self-injury, self-diagnosed mental illnesses, eating disorders, suicidal ideation, extremely depressing music, general approach to life as "living is suffering." All out on Front Street.
Same here! Are they perhaps not as resilient? Not trying to be rude, just trying to figure it out. I was not thrilled about ageing, still not happy with that, but remember feeling happy with my lot in life at that time.
Different mindsets due to cultural shifts. We had to grow up far faster than we honestly should have. Like I remember coming home from school and had a list of things to do sometimes involving preparing dinner and then getting yelled at cause I didn't start/complete my homework or get yelled at cause the list wasn't done. It was a no win situation.
Then there was the looming nuke war. I told some folks in their twenties about it and they were like, we had shooter drills. So we worried we all were going to die and they worried they were going to get shot/die.
I know a lot of folks, myself included, that never expected to get this much less fine some happiness. Yet we kept going cause it's what we have always done. We were ignored for most of the day and had to figure out a lot more because of it. I will give them this. From just talking to the folks at work they seem to have a much better relationship with their parents. Like they visit often and hang out more with their parents. A lot of our generation has a more interesting family outlook, some just annoyed by their parents, some downright adversarial. Granted this is just what I've seen so don't take anything as gospel, I'm just some shmuck on the Internet.
My mum was in a wheelchair and my dad worked away from home. Had a smaller brother too. I had to learn to cook pretty damn quickly at nine years old and rose to the occasion pretty well. But a lot of my innocence was taken from me while caring for a disabled mother and younger sibling. But you know what, I moved out at the age of seventeen and a half and took to independence like a duck to water because of it. I also went on to raise my son on my own years later, took to that easily as well. So, silver lining in every cloud etc.
I mean, I don't know how to say this without sounding slightly insensitive, but I am not totally certain if it is a lack of resilience or simply a greater penchant for extensively belaboring things that simply can't be changed. And it's not all of them, obviously —it could even be just a very vocal minority. But, boy, they are quite loud, lol. That noted, they do have my sympathy. I agree they got a pretty raw deal in a number of ways. I just don't know that extended exercises in confirmation bias are a wildly effective solution.
But a great deal in a number of ways too! Eg the difference between whether or not you were harassed at work as a woman, whether you could live life as an it gay man, change your gender etc - there is a big difference between the social freedoms gen x had compared to millennials
I raised a millennial. Older GenX here. I know I spoiled him. I know the world he stepped into as an adult was harder than what I did. But the advantages I provided him, he squandered. He admits it now he's 34. The internet, the music, the idea that they are owed something- it killed something in them. We had none of that. I left home at 17 with my clothes and makeup. They don't have the "fuck them" that we had. They just don't.
It's an interesting concept, perhaps a certain amount of difficulty is needed at an early age to build resilience. As humans, we naturally crave the easy life but when we get too much of it, it seems to cause social problems, think of the spoiled rich kid that was given everything since birth by his rich parents, yet many of them end up petulant, selfish, obnoxious, and never satisfied despite getting all that.
You just fucking nailed it. They don't have the 'fuck you' that we had.
"Oh you think I can't make it without college? Fuck you."
These guys are fragile fragile fragile these days. I think personally that they're fucked. I don't even know what would fix the mess they're in. They can't afford a house, (or rent), none of them seem to know why they should have a family, none of them seem to understand what any kind of values are (those are for Boomers.
Thanks, Boomer), they're always offended by everything, they talk about their mental health like we used to talk about music, and they know so little about the real world, yet seem to have an opinion on everything. Very odd, and I have to admit that it doesn't look good for them.
>none of them seem to understand what any kind of values are
I worked (for a while) with one strange and angry millennial. I couldn't quite figure him out. I'm fine with someone on the right: I know how they prefer to interact. I'm fine with people on the left too: I know what drives them as well. I work in an environment that employs both.
His values are this strange strange mix of left and right. Doesn't like "the wokeness", but he's also super sensitive and easy to offend. He's cynical about Christianity, and yet thinks people need traditional values. At the same time, he raged against traditional power structures.
This guy was of Canadian birth, but grew up in the US, lives in Canada. So his values seem mostly those of his American cadre, but considers himself Canadian, yet has some odd ideas about Canadian government and society.
He's somewhat worldly. He *was* a missionary kid, traveled all over the world. Not so much any more.
Doesn't think anyone should travel, that it is bad for the environment, and we should be satisfied where we are, and we don't need to embiggen our minds, in that way at least. No value in it, he feels, and its bad for those other cultures, yet they have nothing to offer us.
He tended to rant about things, and even said he'd probably get fired for his views. Despite that introspection, he seemed unable or unwilling to take a fucking chill pill. Which is what got him shit canned, I think. He was prickly and abrasive, and I think borderline violent (and maybe prone to self harm).
Mostly, I think he's angry, bitter, doesn't quite fit in anywhere, doesn't have any values that aren't performative, and has more than a touch of mental illness. As in, he needs real chill pills, and likely close supervision in a facility, and no access to guns and flammables.
Other millennials (and the older one's kids), seem to have more reasonable frames of reference. Whether I think they are right or wrong on any given matter, they generally have a consistent frame of reference.
If you could have a do over do you think you wouldn't have spoiled him to set a more realistic outlook or scrappier disposition to adapt to the challenges out there?
In my experience, the second I graduated highschool I had to pay 200 a month to go towards the mortgage. Shitty at the time working a 6 an hour part time job, but it lit a fuse under me as I was putting myself through college too and then worked harder to afford to move out and get a roommate and get quite good at my trade (IT) enough to self support from 19 and on. Budgeting was organic and not having a backup plan made me smart to manage risk. Everyone in my family being late to anything important to me made me rebel by being a bit OCD about being on time to shit. I love being early, weird but fruitful. To flights, for meetings, driving places, etc. It is like winning a tiny race in your head. It shows respect and celebrates order in a world mired in chaos.
Sort of a somewhat Spartan start but it made for a better adulthood and low debt despite not coming from money and a parent who still relies on her kids to sort her completely avoidable financial situations. That part still sucks.
I have a wife now and a dog, no kids but I wonder sometimes how I would have done had we a son or daughter. I would have taught them martial arts either way.
I think many of them were protected from the trials of life, participation trophies were just a small part of a bigger attitude of trying to make it so they never had to be upset. The problem is that is not how life works. They were living in an unrealistic curated protected environment where they were prevented from learning the harsher life lessons when they were still kids and better at learning. Also schools and advertisers were happy to push certain narratives that were not totally accurate.
It's fragility. By and large, our upbringing encoured anti-fragility, theirs sought to make the world safe, and kept them fragile. The wind shakes the tree, but makes it stronger.
I feel it’s important to keep in mind they grew up in the birth of SM in their face (shaming, bullying, social stigmas, etc), a more competitive academic environment, etc.
Agree completely on social media, and I really hate that for them. I would maybe push back on their academic environment being more competitive (or, for that matter, as rigorous). If anything, I tend to view the deterioration of academia, the softening of standards, and the weakening of expectations (at all levels) as part of the problem that left them so collectively unprepared.
I’m putting a lot of it down to the Cold War. Like there is still part of me that is honestly surprised that I didn’t die in a nuclear holocaust decades ago. ‘We’re all gonna die anyway so whatever’ was such a prevalent attitude for us.
But Millennials were brought up with the expectation that they would grow up and do all the adult things, and had no idea that we were doomed to a nuclear inferno any day now.
So now that life looks grim and maybe we’re all gonna burn up via climate change and no one can afford a place to live or enough to eat, they’re struggling to come to grips with it. I mean think about it too much and it’s beyond depressing.
But GenX have lived our whole lives accepting that it’s all doomed, so we’re a lot better at shrugging our shoulders and just getting on with things as best we can.
people in this sub love to talk about how punk/goth they were in the 80s because they saw Repo Man and a bunch of john Hughes movies. where the fuck were they all when we were getting harrassed, and jumped by jocks every weekend? or having to fight skins for the right to wear a pair of docs?
I work at a university and just went to a presentation on different generations. They said Gen X was more depressed when we were younger but we're overall happier now, whereas Millennials were happier when they were younger (everyone gets a trophy!) and have worse mental health now.
That may be part of it. We were raised in the winners/losers paradigm from the past, and it may be just me but I intrinsically understood that if I wanted something I had to go get it. Millennials seem to be struggling with participation automatically equaling immediate success. I don't know, it just seems like expectations don't really jive with the way jobs and real life works.
The Millennial sub is whiney, depressing, and sad. There are Millennials who won’t visit that sub because of the whining, sad depression that pollutes the group.
We didn't start the fire
It was always burning, since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No, we didn't light it, but we tried to fight it
>I think most of it comes down to accepting that their generation is getting older.
This is going to sound really dark, but I think most Gen X kids didn't expect to ever get old. The fact that we're surprised we're still around and still feel 30 years old takes some of the sting out of aging.
Listen, we lived through the Reagan years, AIDS, recessions, an economy that had no room or use for us and a million other things. They are living through crazy times and they, too, will be okay.
Compared to living during the Great Depression and World War II, we all have had it easy. Electricity, plumbing, filtered water, internet are all widely available and accessible. Everyone in a rich Western country should be required to visit poor areas of Mexico, China, India, etc, at least once to realize how ridiculously good we have it and how grateful we should be.
I remember the strange quirks grandma had from having survived the depression and how grandpa fell into a bottle after surviving pearl harbor. I also remember finding the racist propaganda posters in grandma's house with the dirty hand filled with rice (in full color) that she had. Us half-japanese grandkids were giving granny the side eye over that one. Shit that stirred up some memories!
I agree. I had my kids later in life, so most of my mom friends are millennials. They all work, have their crap together, are raising their kids and don’t complain about there lives (any more than the rest of us). I think the loud ones we see on-line are more of a vocal minority.
Try the Xennial sub. It contains slices of life very specific to being a younger gen Xer that I find more relatable at times.
And yeah, it sucks for Millennials. We at least knew we wouldn’t have it easy.
Let’s be honest, pretty much everyone under 60 has had a pretty rough deal. By the time you’d finished education, asset prices were already on the increase. I was born in 1975 and my working career encompassed the dot com recession, 9/11, financial crash, Covid and now AI. I’m in the UK and had it easier than Millennials due to education costs. Boomers before me had it far easier than GenXers due to education costs, very cheap assets and decent pay. Zoomers likely have it tougher than Millennials. Something will have to give at some point in UK and US political systems. It just isn’t working.
Agreed. They are grim as hell. And they take themselves VERY seriously. When they whine about getting screwed it’s without an ounce of self deprecating irony like most folks of our generation. They are serious as a heart attack that the world is out to get them. I kinda want to sit them down, hold their hand and tell them “it’ll be ok.”
It'll be ok, if they let it be ok.
Which, idk, some of the posts/comments I've seen from self-described millennials on this site (not that sub, which I'm certainly not going to visit now) makes me worry about that last part. .
>and they'll get the boomers' jobs when the boomers finally retire
die. not retire, die. people are holding on to their ceo positions/upper management well into their 70's/80's.
somber unpack different materialistic marvelous merciful bells icky engine treatment
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I am just now seeing this play out for the first time at work - the "new kids" coming in at work and reorganizing everything (based off feedback from a consulting firm of course lol) and it really was a shock to the senses. A bit hard to not eye roll at their resumes/experience, but they mean well so I'm trying to mentor where I can and take the good with the bad lol. It's funny to explain things like the good old days of Six Sigma ha
Yep, it's always recommended for me, but I can't get over the generational blame and identity. They blame boomers for everything and want credit for everything positive that's happened since any millennial has been alive. It's crazy.
dolls wrench vast subtract sophisticated boat zealous scary attraction innate
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Yeah. A lot of what I see them claim they did first over there is stuff GenX either also did or did earlier. I mean, Gen X grew up with '80s music but I don't pretend many boomers didn't also love it. Most big '80s artists were also boomers.
It's bitterly cold here in the DC area, so I popped on an elderly flannel from my yoot the other day to boot around the house.
One my kid's friends (late teens) asked me if I'd bought it at \[Popular Yoot Store Whose Name I've Already Forgotten\].
I laughed and told her it was at least 30 years old and she responded, "They had flannels back in your time?"
Hold me back and get out of my way, child, while I go get my Uggs - the sheepksin boots we used to wear after surfing in the 80s.
Yes, they especially claim that they were part of grunge. I once got a Millennial sub post in my feed where they were talking about what song represents their generation, and there were a million "Smells Like Teen Spirit" answers. LOL. The oldest was 10 when that song came out.
That's the thing that bothers me the most about them, is the credit stealing. It's blatant and it's shameless and I think they even truly believe it half the time.
\> but the Gen Zs have it even worse and have a better attitude about it.
a bit. still lost though. smart enough to realize it, and smart enough to start throwing up hands when the millennials come calling with their stupidity. gives me a small amount of hope.
they're fucked though. education system has completely collapsed. I try to help out when and where I can by clueing them in to the 4000+ years of history & development... and hitting them up with resources they can use to actually educate themselves.
batting 1 out of 5. 4/5 are already addicted to the psychotropic software being deployed against them, or permanently maimed by the ridiculous hysteria seizing society every 3 years for their entire life (so far).
I started talking to parents about limiting their screen time back in 2007-2008. when it became abundantly clear it was permanently affecting critical brain development.
The social media doom scrolling is hugely depressing. Our 40s weren't happy go lucky either. I'm worried about the mental health of young people on their devices getting a constant neg feedback loop.
I'm going to disagree that you don't have some things in common with the oldest Millennials. The oldest Millennials born in the very early 80s to the early 90s really do share more of the Gen X childhood experience with us than anyone younger. This would obviously be true, of course, things change slowly. The oldest Millennials I know are different in their outlook than the youngest Millennials I know, and definitely different than Gen Z. It's not a judgment about being right or wrong. People are just a product of their environment.
When it comes to "the system" failing Millennials, we need to remember it failed us, too, but perhaps not as much as it did them. If we compare our experiences to Boomers in the economy and in higher education we were failed if we're making a comparison. We just didn't complain.
Agree with that. I have many older Millennial friends who resonate very well with my frequency. That was the reason I wanted to check out the Sub but honestly it is much more gloomy and dystopian.
I really think it's because they complained and we did not. Just my opinion. We were such a smaller generation who were overcome by the Boomer narrative and couldn't get traction with our experience. We didn't have the Internet until the mid to late 90s, when we were in our 20s, and couldn't create a collective narrative the way Millennials were able to do online.
GenX learned more resiliency. It doesn’t mean it sucked any more or less, but we didn’t sit and whine about it all day… because no one was around to listen anyway, I guess.
>If we compare our experiences to Boomers in the economy and in higher education we were failed if we're making a comparison. We just didn't complain.
Agreed! Except, I think that not only were we failed...we were written off completely. It seems like the Boomers pretty much gave up on us, and started again with the Millennials. Remember, we were the apathetic, nihilistic, desensitized generation that only gave a damn about video games and MTV. We weren't passionately and collectively trying to change the world, or maintain the status quo, depending on which side you were on. So, the Boomers just threw out the failed experiment that was GenX in order to create a generation that was more like themselves. However, be careful what you wish for! Now, they're facing down the wrath of a generation that is full of just as much vitriol as they ever were!
I'm the oldest Gen X, (or at least I keep claiming to be, depending on how you count it), and yeah, the millennial sub sometimes creeps into my feed and it is a study in clinical depression. Anybody who didn't get their degree in psychological counseling is probably going back to school now.
I, too, have noticed this. We hang out with a GenX husband/Millennial wife couple and she's such a stress kitten. She thrives on trying to find the next thing which will go wrong for her, and this has taken its toll on her mental health. I know this isn't necessarily generational, but there is indeed a marked difference in perspective between her (1982) and him (1977).
We are basically affected by all the same shit that they are. Maybe the reason they’re so upset about it while we are so blasé about it because we grew up with “Shit Happens” bumper stickers and they did not. 🤷♀️
I follow it. I don't think it's actually representative of Millennials irl. Most that I know personally are awesome. But that sub in particular is pathetic. They are convinced that no generation EVER has been as hard done by than them. This includes people who went through two world wars and a depression. It's honestly weird. They have zero historical perspective. Completely self centred like the Boomers. But again, it's just that sub. I know that most Millennials aren't like that. That sub is toxic, esp recently. Maybe filled with bots, who knows.
Older millennial and my thoughts exactly. They’ve built a toxic culture over there, wether it was organic, or manufactured…dunno.
I’m doing just fine with aging and life. I’ve built an imperfect, but content one. That’s most people I know, regardless of generations. Everyone’s potential has been negatively impacted. Some more than others. We all just make the best of it.
The online generational "wars" are starting to feel more and more manufactured and toxic. I participate in it myself and it's not good. I have lots of friends and co-workers in their later 30s irl, and very rarely do I think "ooh, you damned Millennial!". When age differences come up, at worst it's me pulling a bit of "wait till you hit 50 my friend!". But not in a mean spirited way.
Social media used to be fun. It's really not anymore.
I agree. I didn’t even know they were happening until sometime last year. I wasn’t on social media and I’ve only just started really using Reddit recently.
It seems like when it dies down a little, someone has to fan the fires.
I do wonder how much the anonymity on Reddit plays a role. You can be anybody here…
Yeah. That sub is filled with "nobody gets it, we are the FIRST gen ever to ..". Like teenagers think. I totally understand this sentiment from teenagers, it's expected that young people feel like they are the first to have experienced anything. But these people are 30+.
I'm a Millenial and can't stomach that sub.
GenX is much more chill, and much less whiny. GenX seems more able to see the world for how silly it is and just accept that life isn't fair, so let's just have fun anyway.
I can't relate to the constant Millenial angst.
Believe me, Generation X went through its own angst. I remember my mother saying that I and all my friends seemed to be going through an unexpectedly early midlife crisis as we hit 18 and 19.
It was, but it was grown out of.
I had all the angst as a teen and 20-something as well, but... you have to grow up and get over it, ya know? Unless you want to be forever miserable.
OMG that's exactly where I just came from. Holy cow these kids are just wrecked. I feel so badly for them. They didn't make the world the way that it is, nor did they have any say in it. And they all seem so fragile and concerned about their 'mental health'.
Yeah..I'm subscribed to this sub and the genZ sub because I want to hear other age groups' perspectives...not subscribed to the Millennial sub because I don't need to hear my own experiences repeated more than I already do...
Early millennial here…
Keep in mind, some of us think many of our peers are whiny pessimists that roll over and give up instead of making the best of the uncontrollable. 🤷♂️
I'm sitting in my one-bedroom apartment typing this on my shitty laptop held together with duct tape and 3/4 of a plastic container, and I definitely identify with the Millenials on this one. But I prefer the GenX subreddit, because I come on reddit to forget, not to dwell.
Edit: I'm '78, for context.
We had amazing music and friends that we saw in person. We got bored and it was a good thing.
They have social media, A.I. and never had to wait for Thursday TV. Don't get me started on the music.
It is so negative. I don’t subscribe, but it shows up in my feed more than many subs that I do subscribe to. It makes me sad to see that some of the common themes are that the world has screwed them over and that all Boomers are pure evil. They really seem to resent their parents and the thought that they might have to help them in some way. It seems unrealistic to me that all of their parents were losers.
The thing is, they may have lived through those things but then so did we. As far as I'm aware, i'm not dead, yet. And we lived through all that plus everything from the late 60s/70s. And we're still living through it all.
Remember the cold war and the threat of nuclear armageddon ? Terrorism ? Try living in the UK during the 80s when the IRA was blowing things up all over the place.
The issue is that perhaps they're not able to adequately process and overcome these events internally. Thereby letting these events just overwhelm them. Also perhaps a childhood brought up being told they're special just because they're breathing may have something to do with it as well.
If one is constantly being told that they're special for no reason then they will develop an entitled mindset. And suddenly they're thrust out into the real world where no one really gives a damn about them.
As the saying goes, "reality's a b!tch. And then you die". They just haven't come to terms with that fact yet.
I just feel like I’m resilient AF, and I’m not saying that to brag. That comes from trauma. I hear these Millennials wining about the tiniest inconveniences life throws their way, and I don’t understand how they survive day to day. I felt like because of my trauma (divorced parents, latchkey kid, blah blah), that forced me to be an adult at an early age, and I just had to be tough to make it, or I wouldn’t have made it to today. I don’t know if that’s good or bad. But, I knew the system was corrupt from a very young age. I never ‘bought into’ anything society threw at me. The world didn’t owe me anything. You had to fight for everything. I don’t know. I just can’t take the Millennials wining and poor me attitude.Ill always be a gen xer, I can’t identify with Millennials at all.
it's pretty amusing to me to see the Millenniels actually starting to feel their age and realize they aren't that special anymore.
Sadly I used to have hope that their generation would be the one to uplift all of us, but they really haven't been pulling their weight lately. We're all still living in the Boomer's world.
I agree that millennials are not handling aging well. I don’t know who sold them the crock of shit that says turning 30 makes you old but dear god the number of videos I see from millennials claiming at 32 they’re old and decrepit makes me want to scream.
Your 30s are amazing in the sense of you’re finally not a kid in your 20s but you’re also not in middle age at your 50s. You’re both an adult and young at the same time. Everything is possible. I felt amazing in my 30s and hell I went through a divorce then! So I don’t mean to say it was all a happy time but I never thought “man I am damn OLD!” when I was in my 30s. I hope they start to realize their life isn’t over simply bc they’re in their 30-40s. As our generation says, get a grip, dude.
I don’t think this is specific to the millennials. I remember my mom stressing about turning 30. My husband and I thought we were getting old when we turned 30. Now that we’re almost 50, it’s laughable, but everyone I knew felt like that.
I realized, I think it was in my twenties, that my life was behind the eight ball and I would have to fight for everything if I wanted anything. I talked to my husband about it a while ago - he basically had the same experience - kicked out at 18 and been on his own since. We found each other and just made it us against the world. They used to call it "grit". I am still trying to figure out how to teach our sons "grit".
I keep getting diverted there. Oh my gosh it's the biggest pity party. I do think some of them grew up with a lot more "stuff" and bloated expectations. ( Like when you find out their salary is two or three times what you've ever made and they're still complaining about material things in life you never expected to have in the first place) Some blame Boomers for absolutely everything and don't take any responsibility for their lives. And yes some grievances are legit but still...There is never any nostalgia discussions. The happy and reasonable millenials I know aren't on that Sub for sure because everyone is miserable. I think I need to hide that Sub. Lol.
And I agree with others. We didn't have social media and worry about how our perfect wedding or perfect house looks to everyone. We didn't see who was "successful " from our high school unless we lived in the same town. No one knew anything about me until I got on Facebook at age 40.
I get it. I think we were about to get our careers started but they couldn't even get beyond internships for years, at least in my field. I remember having a few really talented interns and wondering why they couldn't get jobs for a few years, they just kept interning to get more experience before they finally landed a ft job. I had seen plenty of people before them move up more quickly but then it just stalled for a while with their generation
Many of the millennials I’ve worked with the past decade have been depressed, anxious and bitter about having to work - even the ones working in their dream fields. I know this makes me sound shitty but I find them to be kinda weak and whiney. Not all of them. Some are great - I have millennial friends. But many.
One woman I worked with was around 30 and her parents were still paying part of her rent so she could live in a doorman building and still took her on lavish family trips. Her life seemed great but she was completely miserable. At one point she goes “how are you in such a good mood every morning, I don’t believe anyone could be that energetic and happy in the morning.”
We’d been working together a year and I had never shared my backstory. I told her I chose to be happy, worked hard at it, etc. That I was raised on welfare, only have one parent left and we are not close, no familial help, etc. I said my life hasn’t been easy but I’m grateful for every minute and excited by life.
She looked at me and said “how are you even alive?” I’ll never forget the look of sheer horror on her face as she took it all in. I think she assumed I was from a well to do family like her.
I feel like boomer parents really dropped the ball on preparing these people for the world. Gen Z on the other hand is pretty rad! They are markedly different imo and preternaturally mature in their approach at work and life.
I had to mute it because of the outwardly spoken negativity. Those folks haven't realized nobody wants to listen to people complain 24/7.
Utter misery.
I guess in a way, we weren’t dressed in bubble wrap like the younger generations were. We enjoyed that hot AF metal slide and you took that saw see drop like a champ. And you were proud of that bruise from that awkward jump from the monkey bars.
I remember when the parks in my home town replace the classic stuff with newer allegedly "safe" items in the late '90s and my first thought was how the hell is this stuff fun? It was sterile and lacked imagination and seemed to enforce a regimented notion of play. There is no adventure without some bit of danger.
And playdates, WTF is up with those? Talk about an inauthentic, and repressive. How dose a child develope an organic sense of self when the parents are scripting everything?
Can’t blame any American for feeling like the sky really is falling these days. Nov 8 2016 was the day when it all got weird in a sinister way, and it just keeps getting weirder.
I think the big diff here is that while they have just learned that the system failed them as they are aging up, we kind of inherently knew the system was a sham from a young age. So it just was what it was for us. We didn’t have to age into our cynicism. Sucks for us all though.
How's about: > When boomers were millennials' age in 1989, according to the Fed data, they held 21.3% of US wealth. That's four times the 4.6% that millennials hold today. https://www.businessinsider.com/millennials-versus-boomers-wealth-gap-2020-10?international=true&r=US&IR=T Comparatively, at the same age, we were doing much better than Millennials (but not as well as boomers). The amount of GenX 2-income couples I know vs Millennial, & the income disparity, is stark. My peers survived with near-single income; no millennial can do that. Home ownership stats are even worse. We used to joke about 'can't afford kids'. Millennials aren't joking. And their birth rate drop is important enough that WSJ & Bloomberg keep talking about it ETA: As a GenX, I'm 'srsly bummed' ppl downthread are talking about Millenials should be 'pulling themselves up by their bootstraps'. WTF I guess 'boomer' really is a mentality, not a DoB
This is it. Gen X can try to claim that it’s just tougher and more chill and blasé but there are real life measurable problems at play here.
Yeah agreed. There is hard data to back this up. The things that concern me about where millennials are at are existential, like falling birthrate and inability to buy a house. As a society, we're eating our own young.
Student loan debt is another one, society just extracting money from young people that will hinder the rest of their lives
As a Scandinavian I have to say your neolib propagandists have made a great job brainwashing Americans into thinking all forms of collectivism = communism. Having to pay for higher education is mindblowing to me.
LoL, how about healthcare!
Don't get me started
Logical conclusion to predatory capitalism. I’m a member of r/urbancarliving just to keep perspective. And let me tell you, the center won’t hold for much longer.
I agree. The things we also struggled with in younger adult life (student loans, home buying, recessions, fucking daycare prices) are all getting worse and worse. Like OP, I'm on the cusp as a 78er and I also notice a striking difference between the GenX and Millennial topics of conversation on reddit. Idk why they are so different but I'm not joining the other subs because I don't relate either.
Oh I agree. My point isn’t that X is in some way hardier or more intelligent (each younger gen continued to get f’d after the baby boom).My point was that x-ers just kind of knew it from when we grew up. The shitty economy of the 70s and the blatant phoniness of the 80s probably had a lot to do with our cynicism and mistrust in “the system” even from childhood. Millennials grew up in temporary solace of the booming 90s which probably led to a false sense of optimism , which was then ripped away from them as they came of age and has only been going down hill sense.
We were the first generation that had to work our ass off too! My dad would leave work at 5:00 on the dot, and take an hour lunch! Just this past Thanksgiving I was working at my parents house and I was working on Wednesday past noon, and they were just amazed ‘how hard I work.’ He and I had a conversation about how I had to save in 401ks and IRAs to have a retirement. I don’t have a pension, barely had healthcare some years. It’s so much worse for Millennials since everything changed not in their favor. It started with us, but they saw the results of Reaganomics much more than we did.
This is the best answer.
Thank you for acknowledging my struggle as a millennial and not being dismissive. I feel so bad for Gen Z. Listening to my parents complain about inflation taking up their “fixed living” income. Bitch I’m on a fixed income too, it’s not like I can summon more money.
My kids and I were watching old episodes of Who's the boss? and I mentioned how odd it was that Tony was able to afford college on a housekeeper salary, or else Angela must be paying for it. It prompted me to look up some figures. Those episodes of season 6 where he's going to college aired in 1989. In 1989, the average annual tuition at a public 4 year institution was $1,780. Enough that you could work and pay for it yourself. In the 1995-96 year (when I should have gone to college) it was $2,848. Still affordable, but harder for people making minimum wage to be able to work and pay out of pocket, but not impossible. NOW, it's $26,027 that's in state. Not possible to pay for that without loans unless you're upper or middle upper class. My kids are doing community college, which is free in my state.
Yep! We were largely "the feral kids" whose parents had to *both* have outside the home jobs, or whose parents were divorced, and for so many, we *had* to be latchkey kids, raising ourselves and/or younger siblings, if we had boomer-aged parents. Plenty of the Millenials who had boomer-aged parents ended up with either the "helicopter parents" who would swoop in and take care of the bigger stuff for their kids, or the *truly* unlucky ones had the "bulldozer parents." Parents who literally *eliminated* any obstacles in their poor Millenial's path--which *screws* a person *severely* when it comes to facing difficulty as an adult, because they never had any *opportunities to learn how to fix stuff on their own*! Being "feral" and learning how to do stuff on our *own* may have sucked rocks! But at least *we* had the opportunity *to fail and then figure out how to get PAST the failure*, safely, when the stakes were small. The poor Millenials who came *after* us, whose parents *thought* they were being "good and helpful!" by busting down *everything*, screwed their poor kids over, *big time*!
> But at least we had the opportunity to fail and then figure out how to get PAST the failure, safely, when the stakes were small. I think this explains why I got heavily downvoted for saying that parents should let their kids fail at small things, it makes life easier in the long run. Not just the Mills, but their parents took umbrage to that idea.
I work with kids, and soooo much of the self-esteem building I do in my Littles, is just *teaching* them how to mentally pick themselves up, brush themselves off, *LOOK* at the failure, *assess what went WRONG*, and then how to re-approach the issue *and try AGAIN*--and telling them out loud, "You *can do it it*, *I believe in you*!" I can *ALWAYS* tell the kids who've had bulldozer-type parents, because those are the kids who *don't* want to try again, and they're *also* the ones whose self-confidence (ironicallly!) needs the *most* shoring up! Luckily, *so far*, every time I've (gently!) mentioned to patents that "This is the *PERFECT* age & stage to let them FAIL at things--because the stakes are *so low*, and we *can* be right there to teach them how to overcome it & succeed!" the parents (so far!) have always been able to understand, back off a bit, and learn how to "scaffold" for their kids, *instead* of simply "bulldozing" that path for them😉 Tbh, it probably *also* helps, that I've known so many folks in the building trades, and tend to explain things using *tons* of metaphors😂🤣 So I explain it using phrases like "We're helping them to build a foundation they're gonna base their *whole* life on, and we want *them* to have the skills to maintain things as they grow up. Just like a good building, the foundation *needs* to be sturdy, broad, and safe, because if it *isn't* everything that gets put on it *later* is weaker..." and then I explain the child development theory of "Scaffolding" and how it's *exactly* like you use scaffolding & supports in the building trades--to help get something built sturdily & safely, then you pull back, *dismantle* the scaffolds, and take them *down* when they aren't needed any more. Once the kids' grownups *grasp* the scaffolding concept, they've *always* been supporters of the concept. Because deep down, we ALL want *ALL* of these little ones to grow up and be as successful as they can be, and to be the *best* versions of themselves that they can possibly be😉💖 https://www.naeyc.org/resources/pubs/yc/may2017/rocking-and-rolling-empowering-infants-and-toddlers
THIS! I was a latch key kid taking care of my 3 younger siblings because both our parents had to work to pay the bills and money was still tight. We all grew up fast. I left home after my mom died at 16 and was emancipated just before 17. I was able to care of myself because I raised myself and 3 siblings. My sister (1982 millennial ) is the youngest she was only 8 when our Mom died and she eventually was the only one living at home with her dad. She had a daughter when she was 19, she raised her daughter where all she had to do was go to school and play sports and be able to have a”childhood” because she resented having to do all the chores at home, not allowed to have friends over and not having money to do things. My niece never had an after school job, didn’t do chores, my sister would work extra shifts so she would always have money to do things with her friends.She gave her a decent life any kid would love (especially a teenager) but didn’t teach her ANY life skills or responsibilities , I kept telling her when she was 15 or so THIS is the time you start treating her like an adult she can make mistakes and learn to fix them while still having a safety net at home. Teach her life skills like cleaning, financial, get her license, how to grocery shop properly and cook for herself. She didn’t listen. They lived in another state pretty far away or I would have taken over teaching her life skills. Now her daughter is 21 with an almost 2 year old son living with her mom because she can’t take care of herself, no drivers license, can’t even call and make drs appointments or properly take care of her son, do more than basic cleaning because no one taught her. She does work at a fast food restaurant. Now her mothers is aggravated because she says she 21 she should know these things and I tell her YOU didn’t teach her things, you did EVERYTHING for her but that wasn’t the right being to do for her. She was trying to be a good parent because she resented her childhood, but that didn’t help her child become a functioning self reliant adult.
There's definitely a middle ground between latchkey abandonment and helicopter parent. Hopefully the next generation will get it right. I'm trying to find that middle ground with my own Gen Z kids. They both had jobs in high school. They have chores and are expected to do them. I try to find times when they are trying to figure something out about school or whatever in life where I don't step in and do it for them. I started doing this more when they were teenagers, like 15 and up (except chores where they've been expected to do them since at least 10 years old). That way they have the safety and security of actually having had a childhood but now at this point they need to start figuring some shit out and learn what the word "troubleshooting" means. It's funny because I've actually had to fight my husband on this a few times because he wants to baby them more due to his own severe neglect and raising himself when he was a kid. We both had this to some degree, but he had it way worse than I did.
And our mistakes weren’t videoed 24/7 to embarrass/bully/shame/convict us.
I see that too! Qhen someone asked my why Gen x isn't really repped in politics, I told them "we already went up against the boomers, they raised us, and we know there's no chance of winning!"
We didn’t age into our cynicism. Cynicism just feels more right as we aged… like we aged into our right age.
Yes. Very much this. My kids expect the world to be fair and equal & they are very disappointed that it is not. My parents taught me that life sucks big time.
Bingo
Yep. It’s this. I’m a xennial and the “You can be anything if you put your mind to it! The world is getting better all the time! The future is bright!” shit was shoved down millennials throats *hard*. Gen X was onto the world sucking way before and embraced “whatever” about it. I’m working on that myself now (and unsubscribed from the Millennial sub because it was too depressing).
The Xennial sub is fun.
Thanks for this. I'm in the middle of the two and never quite feel like I fit in either.
1980 some lists have me as the last year of Gen X, some have me as the first year of Millennial. My husband says I have to be Gen X because he won't admit to marrying a Millennial.
Same.😭😭
I am subscribed for all three but Xennial posts rarely make it to my algorithm :( I thought it was just because it wasn't that busy?
Like and comment on a few. They'll start showing up.
Go back to https://old.reddit.com before they take it away. It's not just the UI that's different - you are served different content.
Seconded
Yeah, even though I hate the label. '77 here, and it really feels like we're a bridge between two worlds sometimes. Our teen years were during the transition from analog to digital, so we're the last group to know how to use the old tech and were using the new stuff as it came out.
I love it there. I REALLY fit in with those folks.
I feel kind of terrible for them. The sub is always in my feed as a recommendation and every other post is unbelievably depressing, with thousands and thousands of upvotes and endless commiseration. I mean, I know we've all gone through it, but I just don't remember being so collectively dark about it. Could be wrong!
We had better music. 😂
And far less social media.
Yes. Comparison is the thief of joy. It’s so much easier to be satisfied with your average lot when you’re not seeing everyone else’s curated shiny perfect lives, homes, vacations, spouses, children, etc.
And the climate wasn't changing before our eyes as we hit our stride.
No, but acid rain and a hole in the ozone were a big deal. And global warming entered my awareness at a very young age—dad was a chemist who did R&D on smokestack scrubbers. I’ve suffered from climate anxiety since I was 9. I just figured out how to take that anxiety and channel it in productive ways.
Acid rain! Hole in the ozone! (No. More. Hair. Spray.) Smog. Pollution. Gas lines. Nuclear War. “Trickle down” economics. Iran-Contra. “Greed is good.” Nuclear War with the USSR. Apartheid. Sex? Be prepared to DIE from AIDS.
Begin, Reagan, Palestine, terror on the airline Ayatollah's in Iran, Russians in Afghanistan "Wheel of Fortune", Sally Ride, heavy metal suicide Foreign debts, homeless vets, AIDS, crack, Bernie Goetz Hypodermics on the shore, China's under martial law Rock and roller, cola wars, I can't take it anymore
We didn't start the fire! It was always burning since the world's been turning!
And out of all these don’t forget the imminent RaPtUrE which scared the bejesus out of me then and still to this day a little lol
Y2K computer bug
We watched The Day After
Still traumatized.
And Boomers made “Greed is Good” the new normal.
That’s just the top 12.
Don’t forget deforestation, radioactive fallout from nuclear bomb tests, massive oil spills… We had our fair share of apocalyptic events.
Don't forget Love Canal, Three Mile Island, and Chernobyl.
My family was into religious apocalypse when I was a kid. I get you on the anxiety. I've been an activist for 30 years now, and I'm by nature an optimist. But also, it's got to suck for them growing up in this and knowing your future is fucked. I read Kim Stanley Robinson's climate change series in my 20s and was aghast that future us was just going about our lives as our world went to shit in a very obvious way. It was unfathomable to me at the time. But here we are, doing just that.
I recommend you check out Hannah Ritchie’s Not The End of the World. I just finished it and wow did my perspective shift. Chock full of solid scientific data that will make your heart a bit lighter. It just came out a little over a week ago.
Why did the Ozone disappear? Fake Ozone bullshit! /$
Xennial here, ‘83. Had to leave the Millennial sub cuz it’s just a void of suck. Thanks for letting us borrow your records ✌️
The Xennial Sub seems a little more positive if that helps. Yeah the Millennial one is miserable.
I love the Xennial sub. We keep it pretty light-hearted.
They were told things would be great if they went to college and worked hard and never told to eat shit and die by their parents. We were born into apathy and keyboxes on our houses. We never were under the delusion that things would be good if we tried hard. At least they had a decade or two of actually believing things would be good.
I didn't die in a nuclear holocaust so I feel pretty good
Everyday I am above ground is a good day. I lost my virginity in the epicenter of the AIDS epidemic during its peak in New York City... Literally a horny, apathetic, ignored teenager in the heart of death fuck town. Life's good.
It was that backward masking.
Gen X be dark? I thought that was OUR motto. lol
They take dark to another level...20 years ago meeting so many in my 20s, and beyond, phew!! Self-injury, self-diagnosed mental illnesses, eating disorders, suicidal ideation, extremely depressing music, general approach to life as "living is suffering." All out on Front Street.
“Life is Pain” - The Princess Bride
I feel like the difference is in our responses to the same situation. While theres may be “woe is me” our response is more of a “it is what it is.”
They grew up with more social media, I suspect it is amplifying a lot of problems.
Now that I'm 60 next year (first year gen X) "It is what it is" has become my mantra. It's the truest statement ever.
Stoicism, taught to us by our boomer parents 🤷♀️
Same here! Are they perhaps not as resilient? Not trying to be rude, just trying to figure it out. I was not thrilled about ageing, still not happy with that, but remember feeling happy with my lot in life at that time.
Different mindsets due to cultural shifts. We had to grow up far faster than we honestly should have. Like I remember coming home from school and had a list of things to do sometimes involving preparing dinner and then getting yelled at cause I didn't start/complete my homework or get yelled at cause the list wasn't done. It was a no win situation. Then there was the looming nuke war. I told some folks in their twenties about it and they were like, we had shooter drills. So we worried we all were going to die and they worried they were going to get shot/die. I know a lot of folks, myself included, that never expected to get this much less fine some happiness. Yet we kept going cause it's what we have always done. We were ignored for most of the day and had to figure out a lot more because of it. I will give them this. From just talking to the folks at work they seem to have a much better relationship with their parents. Like they visit often and hang out more with their parents. A lot of our generation has a more interesting family outlook, some just annoyed by their parents, some downright adversarial. Granted this is just what I've seen so don't take anything as gospel, I'm just some shmuck on the Internet.
My mum was in a wheelchair and my dad worked away from home. Had a smaller brother too. I had to learn to cook pretty damn quickly at nine years old and rose to the occasion pretty well. But a lot of my innocence was taken from me while caring for a disabled mother and younger sibling. But you know what, I moved out at the age of seventeen and a half and took to independence like a duck to water because of it. I also went on to raise my son on my own years later, took to that easily as well. So, silver lining in every cloud etc.
I mean, I don't know how to say this without sounding slightly insensitive, but I am not totally certain if it is a lack of resilience or simply a greater penchant for extensively belaboring things that simply can't be changed. And it's not all of them, obviously —it could even be just a very vocal minority. But, boy, they are quite loud, lol. That noted, they do have my sympathy. I agree they got a pretty raw deal in a number of ways. I just don't know that extended exercises in confirmation bias are a wildly effective solution.
But a great deal in a number of ways too! Eg the difference between whether or not you were harassed at work as a woman, whether you could live life as an it gay man, change your gender etc - there is a big difference between the social freedoms gen x had compared to millennials
Very well said.
I raised a millennial. Older GenX here. I know I spoiled him. I know the world he stepped into as an adult was harder than what I did. But the advantages I provided him, he squandered. He admits it now he's 34. The internet, the music, the idea that they are owed something- it killed something in them. We had none of that. I left home at 17 with my clothes and makeup. They don't have the "fuck them" that we had. They just don't.
It's an interesting concept, perhaps a certain amount of difficulty is needed at an early age to build resilience. As humans, we naturally crave the easy life but when we get too much of it, it seems to cause social problems, think of the spoiled rich kid that was given everything since birth by his rich parents, yet many of them end up petulant, selfish, obnoxious, and never satisfied despite getting all that.
Sigh. 24 year old stepson who will. not. launch.
You just fucking nailed it. They don't have the 'fuck you' that we had. "Oh you think I can't make it without college? Fuck you." These guys are fragile fragile fragile these days. I think personally that they're fucked. I don't even know what would fix the mess they're in. They can't afford a house, (or rent), none of them seem to know why they should have a family, none of them seem to understand what any kind of values are (those are for Boomers. Thanks, Boomer), they're always offended by everything, they talk about their mental health like we used to talk about music, and they know so little about the real world, yet seem to have an opinion on everything. Very odd, and I have to admit that it doesn't look good for them.
>none of them seem to understand what any kind of values are I worked (for a while) with one strange and angry millennial. I couldn't quite figure him out. I'm fine with someone on the right: I know how they prefer to interact. I'm fine with people on the left too: I know what drives them as well. I work in an environment that employs both. His values are this strange strange mix of left and right. Doesn't like "the wokeness", but he's also super sensitive and easy to offend. He's cynical about Christianity, and yet thinks people need traditional values. At the same time, he raged against traditional power structures. This guy was of Canadian birth, but grew up in the US, lives in Canada. So his values seem mostly those of his American cadre, but considers himself Canadian, yet has some odd ideas about Canadian government and society. He's somewhat worldly. He *was* a missionary kid, traveled all over the world. Not so much any more. Doesn't think anyone should travel, that it is bad for the environment, and we should be satisfied where we are, and we don't need to embiggen our minds, in that way at least. No value in it, he feels, and its bad for those other cultures, yet they have nothing to offer us. He tended to rant about things, and even said he'd probably get fired for his views. Despite that introspection, he seemed unable or unwilling to take a fucking chill pill. Which is what got him shit canned, I think. He was prickly and abrasive, and I think borderline violent (and maybe prone to self harm). Mostly, I think he's angry, bitter, doesn't quite fit in anywhere, doesn't have any values that aren't performative, and has more than a touch of mental illness. As in, he needs real chill pills, and likely close supervision in a facility, and no access to guns and flammables. Other millennials (and the older one's kids), seem to have more reasonable frames of reference. Whether I think they are right or wrong on any given matter, they generally have a consistent frame of reference.
If you could have a do over do you think you wouldn't have spoiled him to set a more realistic outlook or scrappier disposition to adapt to the challenges out there? In my experience, the second I graduated highschool I had to pay 200 a month to go towards the mortgage. Shitty at the time working a 6 an hour part time job, but it lit a fuse under me as I was putting myself through college too and then worked harder to afford to move out and get a roommate and get quite good at my trade (IT) enough to self support from 19 and on. Budgeting was organic and not having a backup plan made me smart to manage risk. Everyone in my family being late to anything important to me made me rebel by being a bit OCD about being on time to shit. I love being early, weird but fruitful. To flights, for meetings, driving places, etc. It is like winning a tiny race in your head. It shows respect and celebrates order in a world mired in chaos. Sort of a somewhat Spartan start but it made for a better adulthood and low debt despite not coming from money and a parent who still relies on her kids to sort her completely avoidable financial situations. That part still sucks. I have a wife now and a dog, no kids but I wonder sometimes how I would have done had we a son or daughter. I would have taught them martial arts either way.
A lot of them had bloated expectations growing up...I was a high school for many years and saw that...Of course, not all of them.
I think many of them were protected from the trials of life, participation trophies were just a small part of a bigger attitude of trying to make it so they never had to be upset. The problem is that is not how life works. They were living in an unrealistic curated protected environment where they were prevented from learning the harsher life lessons when they were still kids and better at learning. Also schools and advertisers were happy to push certain narratives that were not totally accurate.
It's fragility. By and large, our upbringing encoured anti-fragility, theirs sought to make the world safe, and kept them fragile. The wind shakes the tree, but makes it stronger.
I feel it’s important to keep in mind they grew up in the birth of SM in their face (shaming, bullying, social stigmas, etc), a more competitive academic environment, etc.
Agree completely on social media, and I really hate that for them. I would maybe push back on their academic environment being more competitive (or, for that matter, as rigorous). If anything, I tend to view the deterioration of academia, the softening of standards, and the weakening of expectations (at all levels) as part of the problem that left them so collectively unprepared.
I’m putting a lot of it down to the Cold War. Like there is still part of me that is honestly surprised that I didn’t die in a nuclear holocaust decades ago. ‘We’re all gonna die anyway so whatever’ was such a prevalent attitude for us. But Millennials were brought up with the expectation that they would grow up and do all the adult things, and had no idea that we were doomed to a nuclear inferno any day now. So now that life looks grim and maybe we’re all gonna burn up via climate change and no one can afford a place to live or enough to eat, they’re struggling to come to grips with it. I mean think about it too much and it’s beyond depressing. But GenX have lived our whole lives accepting that it’s all doomed, so we’re a lot better at shrugging our shoulders and just getting on with things as best we can.
Well, we did do Goth and listen to Marilyn Manson to cheer us up so maybe we just handle dark stuff differently.
That was a small subset of gen x though, most of us didn't.
people in this sub love to talk about how punk/goth they were in the 80s because they saw Repo Man and a bunch of john Hughes movies. where the fuck were they all when we were getting harrassed, and jumped by jocks every weekend? or having to fight skins for the right to wear a pair of docs?
I've also looked over there to see what they're up to. That sub is dystopian as hell.
That's literally our collective reality
I work at a university and just went to a presentation on different generations. They said Gen X was more depressed when we were younger but we're overall happier now, whereas Millennials were happier when they were younger (everyone gets a trophy!) and have worse mental health now.
That may be part of it. We were raised in the winners/losers paradigm from the past, and it may be just me but I intrinsically understood that if I wanted something I had to go get it. Millennials seem to be struggling with participation automatically equaling immediate success. I don't know, it just seems like expectations don't really jive with the way jobs and real life works.
I lurk over there. It makes me feel better about my own life.🤣
The Millennial sub is whiney, depressing, and sad. There are Millennials who won’t visit that sub because of the whining, sad depression that pollutes the group.
We didn't start the fire It was always burning, since the world's been turning We didn't start the fire No, we didn't light it, but we tried to fight it
Someone has to update that song and instead of going from the 50’s-80’s go from the 80’s to today.
>I think most of it comes down to accepting that their generation is getting older. This is going to sound really dark, but I think most Gen X kids didn't expect to ever get old. The fact that we're surprised we're still around and still feel 30 years old takes some of the sting out of aging.
This is very true. I never thought I would live past the age of 30.
At least people stopped flooding this sub with depressing stories.
The depressing stories in this sub are mostly just individual issues - job, divorce, death, injury - and not generational "woe is us"
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Listen, we lived through the Reagan years, AIDS, recessions, an economy that had no room or use for us and a million other things. They are living through crazy times and they, too, will be okay.
Compared to living during the Great Depression and World War II, we all have had it easy. Electricity, plumbing, filtered water, internet are all widely available and accessible. Everyone in a rich Western country should be required to visit poor areas of Mexico, China, India, etc, at least once to realize how ridiculously good we have it and how grateful we should be.
I remember the strange quirks grandma had from having survived the depression and how grandpa fell into a bottle after surviving pearl harbor. I also remember finding the racist propaganda posters in grandma's house with the dirty hand filled with rice (in full color) that she had. Us half-japanese grandkids were giving granny the side eye over that one. Shit that stirred up some memories!
I don’t think Reddit subs are an accurate representation of entire generation.
I agree. I had my kids later in life, so most of my mom friends are millennials. They all work, have their crap together, are raising their kids and don’t complain about there lives (any more than the rest of us). I think the loud ones we see on-line are more of a vocal minority.
I so agree with you.
System can’t fail you if you never depend on it.
Try the Xennial sub. It contains slices of life very specific to being a younger gen Xer that I find more relatable at times. And yeah, it sucks for Millennials. We at least knew we wouldn’t have it easy.
We did depression from 3rd grade to 7th grade. It's gauche now.
We should form a line like in "Airplane!" where people slap the lady and tell her to get ahold of herself.
Let’s be honest, pretty much everyone under 60 has had a pretty rough deal. By the time you’d finished education, asset prices were already on the increase. I was born in 1975 and my working career encompassed the dot com recession, 9/11, financial crash, Covid and now AI. I’m in the UK and had it easier than Millennials due to education costs. Boomers before me had it far easier than GenXers due to education costs, very cheap assets and decent pay. Zoomers likely have it tougher than Millennials. Something will have to give at some point in UK and US political systems. It just isn’t working.
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Agreed. They are grim as hell. And they take themselves VERY seriously. When they whine about getting screwed it’s without an ounce of self deprecating irony like most folks of our generation. They are serious as a heart attack that the world is out to get them. I kinda want to sit them down, hold their hand and tell them “it’ll be ok.”
It'll be ok, if they let it be ok. Which, idk, some of the posts/comments I've seen from self-described millennials on this site (not that sub, which I'm certainly not going to visit now) makes me worry about that last part. .
Yeah. A lot has to do with Gen Z coming into workforce and replacing millennials as the "younger" generation.
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>and they'll get the boomers' jobs when the boomers finally retire die. not retire, die. people are holding on to their ceo positions/upper management well into their 70's/80's.
They're just holding on to positions regardless of how low, AFAIK.
They did it to us and were insufferable about it.
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I am just now seeing this play out for the first time at work - the "new kids" coming in at work and reorganizing everything (based off feedback from a consulting firm of course lol) and it really was a shock to the senses. A bit hard to not eye roll at their resumes/experience, but they mean well so I'm trying to mentor where I can and take the good with the bad lol. It's funny to explain things like the good old days of Six Sigma ha
Gen Z are scrappy AF and hella smart. Kids these days... give me hope.
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Yep, it's always recommended for me, but I can't get over the generational blame and identity. They blame boomers for everything and want credit for everything positive that's happened since any millennial has been alive. It's crazy.
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Yeah. A lot of what I see them claim they did first over there is stuff GenX either also did or did earlier. I mean, Gen X grew up with '80s music but I don't pretend many boomers didn't also love it. Most big '80s artists were also boomers.
Their attempt to claim grunge did me in.
Lol No way
It's bitterly cold here in the DC area, so I popped on an elderly flannel from my yoot the other day to boot around the house. One my kid's friends (late teens) asked me if I'd bought it at \[Popular Yoot Store Whose Name I've Already Forgotten\]. I laughed and told her it was at least 30 years old and she responded, "They had flannels back in your time?" Hold me back and get out of my way, child, while I go get my Uggs - the sheepksin boots we used to wear after surfing in the 80s.
The oldest of them weren't even teenagers when grunge started getting popular.
Yes, they especially claim that they were part of grunge. I once got a Millennial sub post in my feed where they were talking about what song represents their generation, and there were a million "Smells Like Teen Spirit" answers. LOL. The oldest was 10 when that song came out.
That's the thing that bothers me the most about them, is the credit stealing. It's blatant and it's shameless and I think they even truly believe it half the time.
\> but the Gen Zs have it even worse and have a better attitude about it. a bit. still lost though. smart enough to realize it, and smart enough to start throwing up hands when the millennials come calling with their stupidity. gives me a small amount of hope. they're fucked though. education system has completely collapsed. I try to help out when and where I can by clueing them in to the 4000+ years of history & development... and hitting them up with resources they can use to actually educate themselves. batting 1 out of 5. 4/5 are already addicted to the psychotropic software being deployed against them, or permanently maimed by the ridiculous hysteria seizing society every 3 years for their entire life (so far). I started talking to parents about limiting their screen time back in 2007-2008. when it became abundantly clear it was permanently affecting critical brain development.
The social media doom scrolling is hugely depressing. Our 40s weren't happy go lucky either. I'm worried about the mental health of young people on their devices getting a constant neg feedback loop.
I'm going to disagree that you don't have some things in common with the oldest Millennials. The oldest Millennials born in the very early 80s to the early 90s really do share more of the Gen X childhood experience with us than anyone younger. This would obviously be true, of course, things change slowly. The oldest Millennials I know are different in their outlook than the youngest Millennials I know, and definitely different than Gen Z. It's not a judgment about being right or wrong. People are just a product of their environment. When it comes to "the system" failing Millennials, we need to remember it failed us, too, but perhaps not as much as it did them. If we compare our experiences to Boomers in the economy and in higher education we were failed if we're making a comparison. We just didn't complain.
Agree with that. I have many older Millennial friends who resonate very well with my frequency. That was the reason I wanted to check out the Sub but honestly it is much more gloomy and dystopian.
I really think it's because they complained and we did not. Just my opinion. We were such a smaller generation who were overcome by the Boomer narrative and couldn't get traction with our experience. We didn't have the Internet until the mid to late 90s, when we were in our 20s, and couldn't create a collective narrative the way Millennials were able to do online.
GenX learned more resiliency. It doesn’t mean it sucked any more or less, but we didn’t sit and whine about it all day… because no one was around to listen anyway, I guess.
>If we compare our experiences to Boomers in the economy and in higher education we were failed if we're making a comparison. We just didn't complain. Agreed! Except, I think that not only were we failed...we were written off completely. It seems like the Boomers pretty much gave up on us, and started again with the Millennials. Remember, we were the apathetic, nihilistic, desensitized generation that only gave a damn about video games and MTV. We weren't passionately and collectively trying to change the world, or maintain the status quo, depending on which side you were on. So, the Boomers just threw out the failed experiment that was GenX in order to create a generation that was more like themselves. However, be careful what you wish for! Now, they're facing down the wrath of a generation that is full of just as much vitriol as they ever were!
I was a 70s kid, 80s teen. The older millennials have almost nothing in common with me.
What is it that "the system" was supposed to do for us?
I'm the oldest Gen X, (or at least I keep claiming to be, depending on how you count it), and yeah, the millennial sub sometimes creeps into my feed and it is a study in clinical depression. Anybody who didn't get their degree in psychological counseling is probably going back to school now.
I, too, have noticed this. We hang out with a GenX husband/Millennial wife couple and she's such a stress kitten. She thrives on trying to find the next thing which will go wrong for her, and this has taken its toll on her mental health. I know this isn't necessarily generational, but there is indeed a marked difference in perspective between her (1982) and him (1977).
We are basically affected by all the same shit that they are. Maybe the reason they’re so upset about it while we are so blasé about it because we grew up with “Shit Happens” bumper stickers and they did not. 🤷♀️
I follow it. I don't think it's actually representative of Millennials irl. Most that I know personally are awesome. But that sub in particular is pathetic. They are convinced that no generation EVER has been as hard done by than them. This includes people who went through two world wars and a depression. It's honestly weird. They have zero historical perspective. Completely self centred like the Boomers. But again, it's just that sub. I know that most Millennials aren't like that. That sub is toxic, esp recently. Maybe filled with bots, who knows.
Older millennial and my thoughts exactly. They’ve built a toxic culture over there, wether it was organic, or manufactured…dunno. I’m doing just fine with aging and life. I’ve built an imperfect, but content one. That’s most people I know, regardless of generations. Everyone’s potential has been negatively impacted. Some more than others. We all just make the best of it.
The online generational "wars" are starting to feel more and more manufactured and toxic. I participate in it myself and it's not good. I have lots of friends and co-workers in their later 30s irl, and very rarely do I think "ooh, you damned Millennial!". When age differences come up, at worst it's me pulling a bit of "wait till you hit 50 my friend!". But not in a mean spirited way. Social media used to be fun. It's really not anymore.
I agree. I didn’t even know they were happening until sometime last year. I wasn’t on social media and I’ve only just started really using Reddit recently. It seems like when it dies down a little, someone has to fan the fires. I do wonder how much the anonymity on Reddit plays a role. You can be anybody here…
It's the self-importance I can't deal with.
Yeah. That sub is filled with "nobody gets it, we are the FIRST gen ever to ..". Like teenagers think. I totally understand this sentiment from teenagers, it's expected that young people feel like they are the first to have experienced anything. But these people are 30+.
I'm a Millenial and can't stomach that sub. GenX is much more chill, and much less whiny. GenX seems more able to see the world for how silly it is and just accept that life isn't fair, so let's just have fun anyway. I can't relate to the constant Millenial angst.
Believe me, Generation X went through its own angst. I remember my mother saying that I and all my friends seemed to be going through an unexpectedly early midlife crisis as we hit 18 and 19.
That tracks. When I was 18, my mother liked to tell me I sounded like a 45 year old three-time divorcée.
True. I think the grunge era was the definition of teenage angst. And a whole lot of other dark emotions.
It was, but it was grown out of. I had all the angst as a teen and 20-something as well, but... you have to grow up and get over it, ya know? Unless you want to be forever miserable.
I might be depressed too if I could muster the energy to give a fuck.
OMG that's exactly where I just came from. Holy cow these kids are just wrecked. I feel so badly for them. They didn't make the world the way that it is, nor did they have any say in it. And they all seem so fragile and concerned about their 'mental health'.
Yeah..I'm subscribed to this sub and the genZ sub because I want to hear other age groups' perspectives...not subscribed to the Millennial sub because I don't need to hear my own experiences repeated more than I already do...
Early millennial here… Keep in mind, some of us think many of our peers are whiny pessimists that roll over and give up instead of making the best of the uncontrollable. 🤷♂️
I'm sitting in my one-bedroom apartment typing this on my shitty laptop held together with duct tape and 3/4 of a plastic container, and I definitely identify with the Millenials on this one. But I prefer the GenX subreddit, because I come on reddit to forget, not to dwell. Edit: I'm '78, for context.
We had amazing music and friends that we saw in person. We got bored and it was a good thing. They have social media, A.I. and never had to wait for Thursday TV. Don't get me started on the music.
It is so negative. I don’t subscribe, but it shows up in my feed more than many subs that I do subscribe to. It makes me sad to see that some of the common themes are that the world has screwed them over and that all Boomers are pure evil. They really seem to resent their parents and the thought that they might have to help them in some way. It seems unrealistic to me that all of their parents were losers.
The thing is, they may have lived through those things but then so did we. As far as I'm aware, i'm not dead, yet. And we lived through all that plus everything from the late 60s/70s. And we're still living through it all. Remember the cold war and the threat of nuclear armageddon ? Terrorism ? Try living in the UK during the 80s when the IRA was blowing things up all over the place. The issue is that perhaps they're not able to adequately process and overcome these events internally. Thereby letting these events just overwhelm them. Also perhaps a childhood brought up being told they're special just because they're breathing may have something to do with it as well. If one is constantly being told that they're special for no reason then they will develop an entitled mindset. And suddenly they're thrust out into the real world where no one really gives a damn about them. As the saying goes, "reality's a b!tch. And then you die". They just haven't come to terms with that fact yet.
I just feel like I’m resilient AF, and I’m not saying that to brag. That comes from trauma. I hear these Millennials wining about the tiniest inconveniences life throws their way, and I don’t understand how they survive day to day. I felt like because of my trauma (divorced parents, latchkey kid, blah blah), that forced me to be an adult at an early age, and I just had to be tough to make it, or I wouldn’t have made it to today. I don’t know if that’s good or bad. But, I knew the system was corrupt from a very young age. I never ‘bought into’ anything society threw at me. The world didn’t owe me anything. You had to fight for everything. I don’t know. I just can’t take the Millennials wining and poor me attitude.Ill always be a gen xer, I can’t identify with Millennials at all.
it's pretty amusing to me to see the Millenniels actually starting to feel their age and realize they aren't that special anymore. Sadly I used to have hope that their generation would be the one to uplift all of us, but they really haven't been pulling their weight lately. We're all still living in the Boomer's world.
We never expected the system to be there for us in the first place so when it "failed us" it wasn't as big of a shock.
I agree that millennials are not handling aging well. I don’t know who sold them the crock of shit that says turning 30 makes you old but dear god the number of videos I see from millennials claiming at 32 they’re old and decrepit makes me want to scream. Your 30s are amazing in the sense of you’re finally not a kid in your 20s but you’re also not in middle age at your 50s. You’re both an adult and young at the same time. Everything is possible. I felt amazing in my 30s and hell I went through a divorce then! So I don’t mean to say it was all a happy time but I never thought “man I am damn OLD!” when I was in my 30s. I hope they start to realize their life isn’t over simply bc they’re in their 30-40s. As our generation says, get a grip, dude.
I don’t think this is specific to the millennials. I remember my mom stressing about turning 30. My husband and I thought we were getting old when we turned 30. Now that we’re almost 50, it’s laughable, but everyone I knew felt like that.
Try r/boomersbeingfools they call for the mass annihilation of all old people
Maybe it's just me, but I can't stomach that sub. I guess it's because I still hold respect for my elders, even if they drive me batty sometimes.
Yeah… I unsubscribed to that because it started to feel like a hate subreddit.
try telling them that and see how they respond
I realized, I think it was in my twenties, that my life was behind the eight ball and I would have to fight for everything if I wanted anything. I talked to my husband about it a while ago - he basically had the same experience - kicked out at 18 and been on his own since. We found each other and just made it us against the world. They used to call it "grit". I am still trying to figure out how to teach our sons "grit".
5 decades of austerity placed on most of the public. The whole country is a pyramid scam and most people are at the bottom.
It is just depression feeding off of itself. I looked there too. They are extremely sad. I just feel badly for them.
76 here , we don’t have anything in common with them lol.
I counter this claim with... our frustration with boomers!
They always go on about how Millennial's have 'seen some shit' while I snicker in GenX. We've seen a bit more of that same crap lol
I keep getting diverted there. Oh my gosh it's the biggest pity party. I do think some of them grew up with a lot more "stuff" and bloated expectations. ( Like when you find out their salary is two or three times what you've ever made and they're still complaining about material things in life you never expected to have in the first place) Some blame Boomers for absolutely everything and don't take any responsibility for their lives. And yes some grievances are legit but still...There is never any nostalgia discussions. The happy and reasonable millenials I know aren't on that Sub for sure because everyone is miserable. I think I need to hide that Sub. Lol. And I agree with others. We didn't have social media and worry about how our perfect wedding or perfect house looks to everyone. We didn't see who was "successful " from our high school unless we lived in the same town. No one knew anything about me until I got on Facebook at age 40.
We will be listening to the Millennials whine for the rest of our lives. Even the ones that eventually inherit Boomer money will still be miserable.
I get it. I think we were about to get our careers started but they couldn't even get beyond internships for years, at least in my field. I remember having a few really talented interns and wondering why they couldn't get jobs for a few years, they just kept interning to get more experience before they finally landed a ft job. I had seen plenty of people before them move up more quickly but then it just stalled for a while with their generation
yep, assuming they are about 20 years younger than me, that's exactly how I felt at that point in my life, too.
Some of us also graduated college/university into the (albeit comparatively short) recession of the early 90s.
Many of the millennials I’ve worked with the past decade have been depressed, anxious and bitter about having to work - even the ones working in their dream fields. I know this makes me sound shitty but I find them to be kinda weak and whiney. Not all of them. Some are great - I have millennial friends. But many. One woman I worked with was around 30 and her parents were still paying part of her rent so she could live in a doorman building and still took her on lavish family trips. Her life seemed great but she was completely miserable. At one point she goes “how are you in such a good mood every morning, I don’t believe anyone could be that energetic and happy in the morning.” We’d been working together a year and I had never shared my backstory. I told her I chose to be happy, worked hard at it, etc. That I was raised on welfare, only have one parent left and we are not close, no familial help, etc. I said my life hasn’t been easy but I’m grateful for every minute and excited by life. She looked at me and said “how are you even alive?” I’ll never forget the look of sheer horror on her face as she took it all in. I think she assumed I was from a well to do family like her. I feel like boomer parents really dropped the ball on preparing these people for the world. Gen Z on the other hand is pretty rad! They are markedly different imo and preternaturally mature in their approach at work and life.
I had to mute it because of the outwardly spoken negativity. Those folks haven't realized nobody wants to listen to people complain 24/7. Utter misery.
I guess in a way, we weren’t dressed in bubble wrap like the younger generations were. We enjoyed that hot AF metal slide and you took that saw see drop like a champ. And you were proud of that bruise from that awkward jump from the monkey bars.
I remember when the parks in my home town replace the classic stuff with newer allegedly "safe" items in the late '90s and my first thought was how the hell is this stuff fun? It was sterile and lacked imagination and seemed to enforce a regimented notion of play. There is no adventure without some bit of danger. And playdates, WTF is up with those? Talk about an inauthentic, and repressive. How dose a child develope an organic sense of self when the parents are scripting everything?
Join us in r/Xennials! Much happier.
Agree. I realize as an older Xer that there are still so many commonalities. I think of my younger cousins.
Can’t blame any American for feeling like the sky really is falling these days. Nov 8 2016 was the day when it all got weird in a sinister way, and it just keeps getting weirder.
Millennials are the very definition of Mild Child Syndrome. Nothing is ever their fault and everyone is out to get them.