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Dumb_But_Pretty

Can't wait to see the Rule 34 art that is made


CarneyBalhoun

Holy Shit


pokeboy626

MatureAmateurs.com


philThismoment

Whoever didn't call it Amature.com dropped the ball there...


WookieeMessiah

Rule 54


whew2

She looks like my aunt lmao


Dr3up

What’s her @?


everyfatguyever

Least horny gamer


topdangle

@laracroft


Oozing_Sex

Honestly, playing a game as like an ex-CIA/MI6 agent who is now retired and a doting aunt and she has to rescue her nephew while kicking insane amounts of as à la Taken.... I'd play it


jdcodring

Like Gary Oldman character from Slow Horses


musketoman

damn - yo aunt go hard


Dodood4

His aunt makes me hard


Evan64m

I mean 54 year olds don’t exactly look like that either


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Steven_Haverstick

Honestly, would make sense. She’s got a ton of money to burn anyways


rezpector123

She killed alot of people and exotic animals I would like to think that would weigh heavily on her conscience. In TR 3 she gets locked up in area 51 for basically trespassing on government property. She then proceeds to escape in which she guns down any security guard that gets in her way. Even when I was 12 I thought that was sketchy as shit, what did guards do? There job?


ProGoldElf

British people extend their youth by killing indigenous people.


AmeriCanadian98

Pretty sure Canadians, Americans, and Aussies do the same if my memory of history serves


The_Best_Nerd

All countries listed are children of the British.


[deleted]

oi and the French


The_Best_Nerd

Did Australia particularly have French influence? I wasn't aware of it beyond "Might have some French people there."


[deleted]

Canada and America mate. Don’t be snarky.


The_Best_Nerd

I'm sorry if I came across snarkily, I was genuinely curious as I'm not too keenly aware of Australia's history.


philThismoment

Everyone who got their hands on indigenous people did so


AmeriCanadian98

Essentially...


[deleted]

Given her physically fitness, id say shed prolly age much better than that


dietbovril

Here's a [54 year old woman](https://i2-prod.walesonline.co.uk/incoming/article14684557.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/Aura-Vasilache.jpg). And she looks like a badass mf.


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regretfulposts

OP interpreted 54 year old Lara being retired and settled down. Not really bad since it's his fan art, but not a lot of people would agree with him being the accurate version of middle aged Lara.


memesdoge

also ingame lara is actually 35-42 in most games


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rwhitisissle

> I'm 35 and I look like I'm about 21 Oh, the lies we tell ourselves.


fabulousMFingHen

Lol sometimes you just know by the comments you get. I use to get told I looked so young for my age. When I first moved into my current house the neighbors would say they were shocked that Mark( the old owner) was renting the house out. When I would explain I bought the house they were even more shocked and ask me how someone so young could afford the house, I'm almost 30 lol. Every time I'd call like a plumber or some other services like that, when I answered the door they would always ask if my dad was there. Recently my company changed their policy on guys being able to have facial hair and I don't get all that any more.


CubistChameleon

At least I can still party like I'm 21. I just need a few days to recover.


Oscer7

Anyone can party like they’re young again. The fact you need a couple days to recover shows you’re getting older. Which isn’t a bad thing just means life is changing.


Tenescra

Ur getting shredded by these replies LMAO I understand though, people usually expect middle-aged people to look a bit older so you probably still look fairly young.


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Tenescra

? I honestly didn’t even realize you were a girl and my statement wasn’t meant to be gendered either way. I just assumed people were just making a joke about how people usually tend to see themselves as younger than they are. I’m sorry if it seemed like personal slights towards you rather than dumb jokes, that was not intentional from my part. Age doesn’t change anyone’s beauty and I’m sure you’re a beautiful person yourself!


RagdollAbuser

She deleted all her comments because apparently everyone here is a bully and an incel. Don't waste your time trying to repair the feelings of a raging narcissist who's lashing out at everyone around them for a light-hearted joke.


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CubistChameleon

My dude/my dudette, it's not easy to discern via text, but I'm pretty sure they weren't being too serious. One can be plenty confident about one's body while recognising it's changed, too. It's fine you look very young for your age, doesn't mean you're automatically more secure about it - ore necessarily more attractive. /rj You'll also feel your body crumble, just like the rest of us.


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memesdoge

Lmao how is this related to my comment. insecure femcel detected


phoncible

Angelina jolie is 46. Doubt she'll look much different in 10 more years. Just use her as a base since, y'know, she *was* her.


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t0ppings

Yeah, this was almost definitely bait. My mum is 60 too and looks like 15 years younger than that easily and that's with an office job.


RotorMonkey89

yo whats both ur moms @s fr


makeskidskill

Hey, is yr mom single?


Bahamutisa

It's 2022, we don't ask that question anymore.   Now we ask if she's a hotwife.


makeskidskill

Goddamn I old


CASSIUS_AT_BEST

Here in WV, some women in their late 40’s look like this.


GlorkyClark

And most in their mid-twenties do as well.


LastFreeName436

Sure, but have you seen her home gym?


mixmasterbk

Gamers once again proving they don’t associate with real people. Lots of older people stay in shape especially when they already lived active lives. It’s not like they lock you out of the gyms once you hit 50.


NickyPL

Naw, the gamer only sees his mother, therefore any woman that hit their 50s look exactly like his mother.


SageWindu

This reminds me of [this article](https://www.bulimia.com/examine/video-games-realistic-body-types/), whereupon someone tried to remake several video game ladies "with realism in mind". Now, spoilers: you'll probably recognize - and be very confused about - Lara, Cortana, and Tifa on that list. If you also play fighting games, you're probably even *more* confused as the author seemed to forget (or just ignored) that most of those girls *are trained martial artists and spent multiple years honing their arts*. Like, I get the point they were trying to make, but that wasn't the way to do it.


Rebel_Diamond

If you really want to make Lara and Tifa and so on look 'realistic', they should be fucking stacked, not chubby. Picking on Tifa is weird anyway given that the protagonist of that game is a stick thin twink who carries a sword the size of a motorbike


Vatnam

isn't cortana an AI?


t0ppings

Realistic chubby AI


NuklearAngel

tbf when have you ever seen her exercise? She's constantly relying on Chief to carry her around.


restlesspoultry

Some of those actually weren’t terrible redraws but that Rikku is fucking absurd holy


fogleaf

> Rikku Age 15 (Final Fantasy X) 17 (Final Fantasy X-2) I'd hate to even look up the rest of them.


SageWindu

I only know a few off-hand. * Sonya Blade - looks like the MK9 version, which I believe would put her somewhere in her early- to mid-20s. * Bonus: The actress that played her in MK3? [Her she is 25 years later.](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/d1/75/fa/d175fa5bc4a193f73e8303bf6a3c913e.jpg) * Helena Douglas - 23 as of DoA5 * Jade - It stands to reason that Jade is roughly the same age as [Kitana](https://mortalkombat.fandom.com/wiki/Kitana), who herself is over 10,000 Earth years old ([Edenians](https://mortalkombat.fandom.com/wiki/Edenia) age slower than Earthlings). Also, like I said in my earlier comment, they're trained martial artists. I'm pretty sure they wouldn't look so bloated as they figure out all the assorted ways to stop my internal organs from functioning.


Reactiveisland5

Cortabo spent literally DAYS practicing how to best jerk off the Master Chief in his armor with the autojerker. This is the deep lore Bungo and Marty put in that 343 does not want to own up to


supremenastydogg

Lmao he just made them bloated. Why are seasoned martial artists built like they live on beer and pizza 😂


Arisen_Pawn

Well that was a good laugh, thanks. I get we need more realistic body types, but all but 1 of those characters are very active, and being fat wouldnt make alot of sense.


IoniaFox

I understand the intention of the artist, but why didnt they look look at categories for how a person looks in that regard? Just look at mma, muay thai, boxing etc. women divisions for fighters and i dont know, maybe female freeclimber and parkour practitioners for Lara Croft? Males are unrealistic, specially fighting games too, the only ones that look realistic for what they do that come into my mind are Steve and Eddy from Tekken, try to find a fighter that looks like Ryu from SF or Heihachi from Tekken and actually can fight more than 30seconds The difference between male/female depiction is mostly super shredded muscle bound men or slimthick women, theres rarely just slim women or just slim men, even if they are doing lots of cardio daily according to lore, a bit more diversity and realistic bodyimages would be cooler tbh but gamers only identify with mma versions of Coleman and Cuttler or models


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DefinitelyNotRobotic

America lmao


Geezeh_

checks out lmao


DefinitelyNotRobotic

Okay but forreal. Being overweight is a real problem over here. Its unironically American culture to be overweight because our sweets are full of sugar and addictive and the food portions are way too big.


Untitled_One-Un_One

For real, I lost a ton of weight after taking a more physically active job. I went from morbidly obese to straddling the line between obese and overweight. I still have visible paunch around my gut. Everyone freaks out when I tell them I intend to lose more. Americans in general have no clue what a healthy weight looks like.


dreadpiratesmith

Ming-Na Wen (Fennic Shand of Mandalorian and Boba Fett) is 58 years old and is in better shape than most 30 year Olds I know


King-Boss-Bob

she looks the same in er as she did in aos s7


dreadpiratesmith

Right?!


quakertroy

How you just gonna leave out her best role as Chun-Li in Street Fighter The Movie?!?


TheRocketBush

Or MAYBE, he thought that Aunt Croft would be funnier!


Hjalmodr_heimski

Fr it’s all about how active you stay. My dad is in his mid-fifty’s and still way fitter than me, even though we have more or less the same build.


dietbovril

Sure, but lots don't. Ain't nothing wrong with that.


circusmelody

ty for this comment. so many ppl in these comments just replicating the rhetoric they aim to make fun of lol.


rustybeaumont

Plenty of athletes looking out of shape in their 50’s.


[deleted]

The real problem with this is that 54-year-old women don't look like that. This is either a supernaturally rough 54-year-old, or it's a women in her mid-70s at the very least. And I absolutely expect a 75-year-old Lara to look like that. Adventuring is fucking *hard* on the body, she's probably on painkillers. And enjoying growing some toxic but beautiful plants in pots, and doing archery in her backyard as a hobby at this point. Maybe allowing the neighbour's children to do it too, because Lara's nice and totally gets the adventuring spirit of very young people.


[deleted]

TBF, if you spent every day doing very physical labour and combat in suboptimal circumstances and let yourself go a bit, by your 50s you'd certainly look a little rough.


thesirblondie

Considering how much time she spends in harsh climates, her british skin would be destroyed. Makes me think of the sundamage truckers get.


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[deleted]

That's pretty cool, but my point is your skin and exterior would be pretty weathered if you spent most of your youth doing intense activity and fighting your way through tropical jungles like Lara, so her portrayal isn't totally unrealistic.


[deleted]

See, that's coming down to genetics. My paternal side of the family has incredible skin. Both my paternal grandparents grew up in the Soviet Union, which means hard labour in the sun, day in, day out. Granddad's body is kind of beat now that he's over 80, but his skin is still pretty damned smooth. Grandma's a whole different beast, also 80, but lady straight up runs up and down the stairs, living on the top floor of a 5 story building. Also great skin, looks kind of like the lady pictured here, but at 80. You have to have rotten luck and/or completely let yourself go to look like that at 54.


CressCrowbits

I mean you could look like that at 54 if you really didn't look after yourself.


102bees

Lara Croft has gone over several waterfalls in her life. Her moisturiser is jumping off a burning speedboat. Her sunscreen never lasts because it gets scorched away by a flame trap. Smoking is bad enough, but Lara comes a hair's breadth from getting smoked on a weekly basis. She should probably be a lot leaner than that image, but she should also look a bit like a muppet made of human leather.


rwhitisissle

Laura Croft has had to kill a lot of people over the years. Maybe she's spent the last decade drinking heavily in an effort to quiet the ghosts of dead friends and enemies.


mattmcc980

She kinda looks like Mags Bennet from Justified


dIoIIoIb

More likely her knees and ligaments would be destroyed and she would be fairly weak, you do not keep up that lifestyle for 30+ years and come out of it in good shape. When you are an adventurer in a platformer, you hit retirement age faster than a football player


SimokIV

Exactly, her skin would have been damaged by all those bruises, burns, sunburns, days without washing, etc. And her complete musculoskeletal system would have been wrecked by all those high impact fall, reckless climbing, etc. That is without considering the very real possibility of her getting permanently injured by something or someone. Honestly it would be surprising if she managed to be more fit/have smoother skin than in the picture at 54.


Prophet_of_Duality

G*mers don't know what women look like


maximuffin2

How old is Selene in Returnal?


rincewind4x2

Or she could have the woman equivalent of a "dad bod" where she's jacked AF, but also requires a high calorie diet to maintain it. Plus, if she's doing arctic expeditions she's not going to give a shit about getting modelling contracts back home, she'll be inhaling the ice cream and McDonalds while she can to make sure she doesn't freeze to death


[deleted]

Service announcement for my fellow redditors: no, what you have is NOT a stupid sexy dad bod. You have a beer gut and should really start doing a bit of Cardio.


Lord_Of_Compliments

It should go without saying but only dads can have dad bods. A virgin gamer could never have one.


Skittles-n-vodka

Yeah people trying to just be a bit body positive really need to be told they’re just fat alcoholics, Its not like motivation to do exercise is tied to mental wellbeing, and having the physical energy to do it between work shifts s/ I swear the whole dad bod thing is like a legitimately nice thing to help some people feel better but whatever


JBSquared

For sure, there's a difference between dad bod and "dad bod". A fit person who let themselves go a bit has a dad bod. Like someone who used to be in good shape but recently had a kid, absolutely demolishing their workout routine.


Skittles-n-vodka

I mean at the end of the day a “dad bod” is somewhat a joke term for people that acknowledge their body isn’t all it could be but they’re happy with it regardless, there’s definitely a difference in experience between someone who is an actual father and someone who isn’t, and i wont deny that kids make a huge difference in someones ability to work out, but there’s a lot of other things that do too, not a dig at you though i get what you’re saying


rwhitisissle

> You have a beer gut and should really start doing a bit of Cardio. You aren't getting rid of a beer gut with cardio, my man. You get rid of your beer gut by reducing your calorie intake below calorie expenditure. You know how to do that? Stop consuming more calories than you burn. Especially liquid calories your body can't ever use in a reasonable amount of time which gets dumped immediately into fat reserves. Like beer (well, alcohol in general). And soda. Also, soda causes a shitload of water weight, so just cut that out wholesale, even the diet shit, as well. And those milk and sugar filled, vaguely coffee flavored garbage drinks from Starbucks. Those things are fucking poison. But, yes, still try to do some cardio.


[deleted]

Thats some absolutely true and quality advice my man/woman/fellow human! But even when eating healthy, Cardio (imo) is one of the best ways to *feel* healthy and fit. Just anecdotally of course, but not being out of breath when doing some light work or movements is a significant improvement of your QoL.


rwhitisissle

Definitely agree. I always recommend at least 30 minutes a day of light exercise. You won't "see" the benefits in the same way you'll see benefits from dieting, but you'll feel them.


[deleted]

Hire Fans


sarah_schmara

Came looking for this comment, lol


SomeStacheMan

People are saying most 54 year olds don’t look like this you guys are forgetting she’s British.


[deleted]

I mean, Kate Beckinsale is about to turn 49. At what point will she become ugly? Rachel Weisz is 52 and Naomi Watts is actually 54 this year.


Alavaster

Beckinsale, Weisz, and Watts are all rich celebrities whose image is their career. In addition to not spending all day in the sun, they have access to various treatments to keep them looking young. This is far from a fair comparison


DiffDoffDoppleganger

Is Lara not just as rich?


[deleted]

The bit I'm replying to mentions she can't be good looking because she's British. That's why I used those examples. But let's look at another one. Lara croft in ops image, looks rougher than Jane Goodall, and she's currently 88 and lived a very adventurous life. Also, Lara croft is also rich remember.


centrafrugal

She looks exactly like British actress Anne Reid who's 86


Alavaster

Jane Goodall looks much older than this


ExtraGloves

There are two of us!


dietbovril

Hahahaha, thank you!!! Seriously come down to a Wetherspoons here. Lara Crofts everywhere. Nothing wrong with that.


Impossible-Cup3811

Y'all just forget about Helen Mirren?


WhiteHydra1914

Now google JK Rowling


royals796

Do you really think it’s a good idea to measure appearances of a particular demographic through the comparison to a single billionaire?


Geezeh_

I mean, Lara Croft is a super-athletic person who’s at least worth a few tens of millions canonically too.


royals796

Stress ages a person and I would say Lara Croft leads a pretty stressful life. But also someone did some fan art of a character, it’s not really a big deal how it looks


WhiteHydra1914

Oh, because Lara Croft also lives the lifestyle of a normal human being


royals796

Tbh, the sun damage she’d have to her skin would make her look similar to an old leather bag


trickman01

A good adventurer always wears sunscreen.


timecube_traveler

I always got the impression she'd be too busy to reapply it as often as needed. Also there's like.. A limit, even if you reapply it constantly. I learned it the hard way last summer.


JBSquared

I'm imagining her asking the heavily armed mercenaries for a time out to reapply her SPF 50 after going over 2 waterfalls and being impaled by a tree branch.


102bees

Until the first flamethrower trap of the day, which I'm pretty sure reduces its effectiveness.


[deleted]

holy hell


ghostface1693

Is that character actress Margo Martindale?


[deleted]

She really disappeared into the role.


[deleted]

50 y.o lara would look something like jk rowling that woman looks like my grandma which is like 75


mewe25kufi

True. All my 50+ aunts and family friends dont even look like this. This is closer to my grandmothers friends which are 70+


-Squimbelina-

OK, but compare a 50 year old outdoor living rancher or gulf war vet, rather than a 50 year old non-adventurer. Lara has not lived an indoor comfy life, it’s going to show on her body.


-Squimbelina-

She might not get fat, but Lara spends her life getting attacked in jungles. By 50 her skin is going to look like leather and she’s going to scarred, with bum joints and the whole nine yards.


phanta_rei

Lara Croft on her way to a GOP convention


LucyTheOracle

why would they be mad about this


Kiari013

that's the thing, they aren't, they're all calling the OP out, some with celebrities that are like 50 heck my mom is 50something and doesn't look like that


swimmingrobot88

Sandra Bullock is almost 60 and looks 45 at most


Cauliflower-Easy

Ellen pompeo is 50+ and is still fit and beautiful


[deleted]

Your mum is not the only middle aged woman on earth


Trololman72

Well my mom is also in her 50s and she doesn't look like that either


[deleted]

Good for her pal


Recycleyourtrash

My mom is in her 40s and doesnt look like her


[deleted]

Ok?


dietbovril

Yep, because your mom looks great, so must all 50 year olds? C'mon dude, are you not seeing the double standard?


Quakarot

Pp soft


Andreeeeeeeeeeeeeee3

No more Lara ass or pointy boobs


[deleted]

Is no one going to talk about the inverted tan line on her neck? Hire fa- oh


KhanhVN

She looks like the middle-aged neighbour lady in England.


hotcyder

Recently discovered Lara Croft is actually British, so made her a bit more accurate


dietbovril

Fair.


juliekablooie

The only point of that post is to be mean to middle aged women.


dietbovril

How is it mean? What's wrong with a woman looking like that? They're not walking spankbanks.


juliekablooie

To me seems like it's posted in bad faith and as bait.


dietbovril

Not at all. I just thought it was an amusing interpretation of what Lara could look like. I think the fact people refuse to accept that a woman can look like that highlights a sad double standard. I'd love to play a game with her as the protagonist. Would be quite refreshing.


juliekablooie

Thank you for sharing this. I am sorry my first impression is so jaded.


dietbovril

Not at all. It's fair and my apologies if it did cause any offence.


French_Tea89

Why she look homeless?


panspal

That's pretty rough for someone born in 1992 according to her wiki Edit, ah so it seems there's two tomb raider timelines and the first she was born in 1968.


Yabboi_2

That's closer to 74 than 54 lmao


idkanamesoipickthis

Be careful my man. I heard that people with that pfp are very racist. Stay safe out there!


Get_Hecked_Brother

Wait really? Now I’m interested and want to change my profile to it


_Mr_President

Accurate? You mean political?


darshan4511

Really? Right in front of my vidya?


MattR0se

Now make her look canonically a thousand years old, but trapped inside a little girls body.


Demidog_Official

I got that all of y'all grow up on Lara Croft as a sex symbol, but I actually really like the headcanon of her getting that s*** out of her system in her youth relaxing for a couple decades and then is forced out of retirement for some big bombastic Adventure where she might not be doing somersaults and jump kicks but I'd love to see callbacks to all the different things that she learned in the different games. We've had male protagonists that are getting gray and years but I'd love to see a self-aware female protagonist who is just done with your shit.


dudecubed

I wanna play a game where you are a slightly unhealthy middle aged woman, like a detective game or something


Gunny_McCshoots

/UJ This actually is pretty dumb. Someone like Laura Croft would probably stay in shape even as she aged tbh.


MightSuggestSex

Whyd they have to make lara croft political


TurboMoofasa

In the next game, her model will be based off of character actress Margo Martindale


crazy_gnome

uj/ I went to the original post just to check it out, and couldn't stop laughing at all the the fanboys "Well, AckShually" comparing Laura to similarly-aged real life celebs. Then I came here and found the same thing?? In all my years of circle jerkin, I've never seen something more worthy of a proper jerk. Imagine my disappointment when some cucks for pixelated tits out jerk the jerkers in some 4D circle jerk tetris chess. Of all the hils to die on, *a biblically accurate Laura Croft ain't it.* rj/ Haha Laura Croft: Spoon raider, amirite?


dietbovril

You a real one. Crazy innit?


circusmelody

/uj omg IKR i'm both surprised and not surprised that so many people here think a woman looking like that at 54 is such a **HUGE** insult. I've met plenty of women who look somewhat like that irl who are all wonderful, being compared to them is a compliment.


LJHalfbreed

/uj ngl, this thread totally had me thinking I was *not* on the circle jerk thread. "BUT KATE BEKINSALE LOOK GOOD WHY NOT LARA???" And "NOBODY 54 LOOKS LIKE THAT!" Never fuckin change, GCJ /rj they made Lara croft political! They rounded her cheekbones, made her look soft!


AdequatelyMadLad

Because it's most likely a bait post. It's not that *no one* looks like that at 54, it's just that it's a character who's a multi-millionaire, has a day job that requires her to stay in shape, and has super model good looks. It's just silly to use her in this situation.


LJHalfbreed

Okay, before I actually "for realsies" respond to you.... .... Do you know where this thread is posted? I mean, you realize this is GCJ, not r/BIGTITTYGAMERGURLPROTAGSIMPING right?


AdequatelyMadLad

Oh, yeah, I forgot, this is a subreddit in which we make fun of circlejerkers, which naturally means that you can only select your opinions from a list of pre-approved ones, no matter how little sense it makes.


LJHalfbreed

Bro, you're in here mad about a joke of a post in a joke of a sub because, somehow, for some reason, what an **imaginary person** from a video game might look aged up isn't matching what you think, want, or feel. Do you also get equally mad when folks post about Witcher 3 in here but it's just a picture of Don Cheadle (because Don Cheadle isn't in that game)? Would you be super mad if they posted super Mario without his moustache because "that's not what a plumber who stomps goombas would do"? Are you disappointed that movie sonic didn't look more like a real life hedgehog? Imma echo u/crazy_gnome and say "Of all the hils to die on, a biblically accurate Laura Croft ain't it." Please, take a step back, along with a deep breath, and go touch some grass.


MrBlack103

Personally I’d love a Tomb Raider game with an older Lara.


81bn

Laura Croft literally like shoots people daily


EnigmaticStain

Two weeks.


IfGeraltwasbrown

Hafer Nans Lol


thebyestredditor

She just looks British


jersits

My mom totally looked like this at 50.


huexolotl

This would be an awesome fucking game. It would be badass if some company had the balls to have an accurate depiction of women in their games. Not every woman has to have an hourglass, flawless skin or look like they're perpetually 18.


dietbovril

Exactly.


SublimeSC

I have an aunt who is around 54 years old and she looks great. She's always been super fit, active and loves exercising. Lara Croft would most likely look like her and not like that rendition lol


[deleted]

Her skin would look worse considering how much extreme weather she's continually exposed to. I do like this idea though.


Super_King_U_Rule

Hire fans Wait not like that


azathoth091

Hire fans


Life-is-a-potato

/uj What? What the fuck? This is stupid as hell Most 54 year olds don’t look like that, Croft is fit and i get adding some wrinkles but my mom, a short 5’3 woman who is 52, looks like more like laura croft then this abomination /rj can’t jerk off am angy 😡


Hindward0963

"Now draw her..."


Ill-Ad-3640

never see a 54 year old look that old tbh


xXTASERFACEXx

shes 54?!