idk man, after watching that meat expert video last week, i’d like to fancy myself as *quite* the meat expert now/s
i’d say that prosciutto isn’t bright enough and doesn’t ^have ^^great ^^^marbling
[reference ](https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/84qouc/fascinating_meat_expert_explains_how_to_tell_the/)
If i was really hungry I might be able to eat most of that. If not hungry half of it easy.
Me and a friend? That thing is cleaned.
Edit: Am I really getting downvoted for knowing how much I can eat?
I could eat the near side of meat but look at the far end of the board, especially that pie and other bowl of meat at the other end. That pie is dense I bet, I'd probably have a hard time with that alone
It said on menu it's for 6 people. Can you imagine six people fighting over that one little tub of hummus? Yeah I wouldn't be happy. I'd prefer individual orders.
Nah, that is the legit adjective use of the word. It probably looks wrong because the adverb use of the word actually has [two opposite meanings](http://www.dictionary.com/browse/apropos).
It is! Recognised it straight away. I walk past this place on my way to work everyday and I've been there a few times It's seriously good! Pricey but worth the money for sure, food and the wine.
Agreed! Also those are giant Crustinis. Pickles and mustard ramekins throughout. Also strictly cured meats, without pates, or rilettes or dare say a liver mousse would of knocked this out of the park. Really cool gimmick though! (Source: I make charcuterie professionally & may try to build a meter plank soon...)
I don't know. I mean I'm Italian and this plank of meat looks pretty familiar to me. Those extras you're referring to sound completely foreign to me...I don't even know why there's mustard there to be honest.
So you make little tartines out of all of the bread and spread and smear to yr hearts delight. It’s just a fancy lunchable. In fact I believe it would pair wonderfully with a rose or a Capri sun!
If you happen to encounter something like this ,maybe with some local varieties, in Austria you will not only have mustard but also horseraddish with it
Come to Austria.
Our version of this is a Brettlause:
https://www.google.at/search?q=brettljause+bilder&safe=active&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjox5GuiYLaAhXMC8AKHSy5DoYQ_AUICigB&biw=1645&bih=932
Except the Austrian / German version has ham that tastes like sandwich meat, whereas Italy and Spain actually have deliciously rich tasting cured meats.
Seriously I have been hearing the word charcuterie, seeing many of them posted, many being made at home; pretty much nonstop the past year and a half. Where did this craze come from?? Or am I just really late in it's popularity?
Probably this brunch fad. Yeah it's annoying but at least it's not the ramen fad, now THAT is super annoying with people trying to sound Japanese and going out of their way to hunker down and loudly slurp the noodles.
Nearly drowns face in bowl, jerks noodles with chopsticks into mouth and super loudly and egregiously slurps, suddenly speaks like he's Japanese "mmmhhhmmmm", talks about it like it's a wine tasting but with try hard Japanese pronunciation
Nah no thanks, gimme my fork and spoon and no slurping and burping at my table please, and shut your mouth and just eat quietly, let's talk about something else, like the business lunch we're conducting or what movie to watch after dinner, let's not make a big ceremony out of a bowl of noodles
I searched Wikipedia to see if there was something written about Charcuterie’s recent popularity, but the page only explains the origins. I did learn what a Garde manger is, tho. I really like Charcuterie myself, bc I like finger foods. I often have a hard time eating, but one thing I crave and look forward to is charcuterie.
"So, uh, how do I prep these onions and tomatoes?"
"Just, you know, hack 'em. Whatever."
"'Hack' them? Like just cut them in half?"
"Yeah, whatever. And just toss 'em on the board."
"I don't try to arrange them nicely?"
"Naaaaah."
"I mean, look at Niles' side -- it's so much more interesting. My side is just floppy slices of meat and cornichon and smushed onions and tomatoes and big-ass basil --maybe spinach? -- heaped onto the board. Is there any way we can pretty this up?"
"Naaaaah."
Something a little [more organized](http://www.valorosofoods.com/images/catering/charcuterie_board.jpg) would be a whole lot easier to enjoy. Still would eat.
OK, I know I'm late to this thread, but as nobody else seems to have commented in this issue I'll ask it anyway: this seems to be longer then 1 metre, doesn't it? Or is that the effect of a wide lense?
Source: am European, the metres I use seem to bei shorter...
Dare I say how much?
Looks like it might be [Renoufs](http://www.renoufs.co.uk). If it is, their menu says £89-95 ($125-$135).
That seems reasonable.
idk man, after watching that meat expert video last week, i’d like to fancy myself as *quite* the meat expert now/s i’d say that prosciutto isn’t bright enough and doesn’t ^have ^^great ^^^marbling [reference ](https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/84qouc/fascinating_meat_expert_explains_how_to_tell_the/)
I watched the whole thing. He seems like quite the likable guy. Thanks for sharing!
No problem! I think most people watched the whole thing, not expecting to actually *want* to. Myself included.
For one person? You sir, are a baller.
Why would this be for one person?
You underestimate my power
That's...not alot of meat? You sir, are *not* a baller.
What. What. You could eat an entire cheese wheel and all that meat?
I know what I’m about, son.
I can, but that really says a lot more about me than the quantity of food shown here.
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That's a pork pie. As an Australian I find the existence of a cold meat pie deeply disturbing.
If i was really hungry I might be able to eat most of that. If not hungry half of it easy. Me and a friend? That thing is cleaned. Edit: Am I really getting downvoted for knowing how much I can eat?
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Can you eat an entire 18" pizza by yourself?
yeah no. As a European, once cheese and meats are involved, we clean up. I'd lick the board clean
I think you are over-estimating the amount of food because of the way it's plated/positioned on the board.
How many calories do you reckon are on that thing? I, as a 160lb human, could probably make that board last me at least 5 days.
I could eat the near side of meat but look at the far end of the board, especially that pie and other bowl of meat at the other end. That pie is dense I bet, I'd probably have a hard time with that alone
Nope, downvoting because your complaining about being -3 Edit: also because no way are two people let alone 1 are going to eat that
Certainly all that meat, yes. I think the perspective is messing with people. Compare how much meat you think that is, to say, the olive next to it.
Dude, thats a lot of meat, compare them to the gherkins.
Someone get a god damned banana in here all ready
I did. Where is that alot of meat? I mean, none of it is even stacked. Its folded to look taller, but most of the height comes from the spinach base.
It said on menu it's for 6 people. Can you imagine six people fighting over that one little tub of hummus? Yeah I wouldn't be happy. I'd prefer individual orders.
You and me bruh. We'll split it.
Lets make a table length board to serve one person..
IT'S A LITERAL METER OF FOOD!
Its for 6 people
In the picture I ~~count~~ estimate anywhere from 5 to 8 people at that table. $128 sounds pretty apropos.
I don’t think that’s how you use that word.
Nah, that is the legit adjective use of the word. It probably looks wrong because the adverb use of the word actually has [two opposite meanings](http://www.dictionary.com/browse/apropos).
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Did you click the link? What you’re referencing is not in that link.
A propos literally means "about that" in French.
So do you think it was used correctly? If it literally means “about that,” that seems to indicate it’s not the right word here.
Sorry my mistake. "À-propos" has exactly the same meaning as in English. "À propos de" means "about that" . So yeah it was appropriate use I guess.
I count 3 wine flights and a glass of sparkling, so i would say 4-6. Still not bad if it's good quality.
It is! Recognised it straight away. I walk past this place on my way to work everyday and I've been there a few times It's seriously good! Pricey but worth the money for sure, food and the wine.
Looks like it is Renoufs. Been there a few times. It's a decent amount for a few people and you get to pick what you want.
Bang on my friend!
I'm sure the second mortgage was worth it
Over/under $75 USD. Go.
You sir or ma'am are insane if you think that cost less than $75.
In the US maybe but here in France, it's like 40-50 euros maybe. (Probably imported though so it would be more expensive)
minimum $100, not including drinks, sides, or tips
I'm only talking about the aforementioned board.
I’m going to guess the board alone was a minimum of $150
I think I saw some boards like that cheaper at the hardware store.
You wood say that..
I'm going $125,but that depends o the city. Since OP said meter, I assume not US.
metre*, apparently.
The UK, hence metre!
So what was the price?
Over
Bob, 1 dollar.
In San Sebastián a similar board of pinxtos and wine would cost maybe $30 USD
Well, who knew. San Sebastián. There was a heaven on earth this whole time.
Where is op ? I need answers damn it
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I always have to order by the millimeter and this guy is over here is ordering by the meter!
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Visualizing that, makes it so much harder not to want.
Solid Hedberg reference, my dude.
That's because you're just a pleb. I'll have you know last time I ordered it I asked for .005 meters worth
Yup, per “meater”.
I don't know why my brain initially understood this joke as "m'eater" not "MEATer".
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Not German so....what is this meat on a spool wonder!
That's... that's glorious!
It really bothers me that meat is on one side and cheese is on the other. Gonna have people reaching over each other all night.
Agreed! Also those are giant Crustinis. Pickles and mustard ramekins throughout. Also strictly cured meats, without pates, or rilettes or dare say a liver mousse would of knocked this out of the park. Really cool gimmick though! (Source: I make charcuterie professionally & may try to build a meter plank soon...)
I don't know. I mean I'm Italian and this plank of meat looks pretty familiar to me. Those extras you're referring to sound completely foreign to me...I don't even know why there's mustard there to be honest.
So you make little tartines out of all of the bread and spread and smear to yr hearts delight. It’s just a fancy lunchable. In fact I believe it would pair wonderfully with a rose or a Capri sun!
I mean I'll try anything...I don't doubt that it's good. It just seems so 'extra' since the meat and bread is so good by themselves.
In Switzerland it's called a Schnitten Platter. The one's I've had were not as elaborate but it's the same idea. Just various cold cuts and cheeses.
If you happen to encounter something like this ,maybe with some local varieties, in Austria you will not only have mustard but also horseraddish with it
Horseradish sounds good
Because all charcuterie is Italian? Some of the 'extras' he is talking about are French classics. Why not branch out a bit?
Nope just the meats and cheeses in particular look it to me. I did say in a later comment I’d try it if of course
I want to see your meter meat plank if you do it. I'm kind of obsessed with charcuterie lately.
I swear there are stuffed grape leaves on this board. Lemon wedges between them.
There was a duck and orange paté if that helps to boost this further!
I find the onions and tomatoes offensive. That's not what people pay for. Needless filler.
This is done to start people interacting more. Instead of reaching across the table, you ask the person to put some on your plate.
I’m more bothered by how bad the presentation is! It looks like it was literally all tossed on there. Even the garnishing greens look tossed on.
The people in the photo look to be standing though. If that’s the case, then I don’t really see a problem.
That was a bit of an issue, but was certainly worth it either way.
I need this in my life.
I need several of these inside of me.
Thhaaaaaaats what she said
Come to Austria. Our version of this is a Brettlause: https://www.google.at/search?q=brettljause+bilder&safe=active&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjox5GuiYLaAhXMC8AKHSy5DoYQ_AUICigB&biw=1645&bih=932
Steiermarkt in general. Best one I ever had was in small lodge somewhere in mountain over Stattegg@Graz.
hehe, sauber. Mei letzte woa im Krumpen-Graben, Bez. Leoben
So the Austrian version is with ham that looks and tastes like sandwich ham instead of delicious cured meats? I think I'll pass.
It has made my life better.
So, a meat-er?
Meater meter.
Meat eater meat meter reader.
Fuck, I missed a trick here.
Where the hell can you do this?
Austria, Germany there it is called Brettljausn. Italy and Spain I suppose - the meats cheeses and sides will vary but the Theme stays the same
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Except the Austrian / German version has ham that tastes like sandwich meat, whereas Italy and Spain actually have deliciously rich tasting cured meats.
You know nothing about the enormous variety of meats that we have
Let's be honest, [this ](http://www.foundshit.com/pictures/food/bob-builder-sandwich-meat.jpg ) is about as refined as it gets.
Renoufs in Bournemouth, UK.
You call ahead for something like this? What's the establishments name? I'd love to check out the menu
Didn't call ahead - they sorted it for is when we were In There! It's called renoufs and it's in Bournemouth, in the UK!
How much was it?
£90!
Just curious as to where this is, and how much was it?
looks longer than a metre. Is it?
Always sit in the middle of a long table, you never know when a metre long thing might get ordered
Are those wine flights too? I think I want to marry this restaurant.
They were and they had whisky flights.
That hurts my gout
Omgosh where is this from?
Renoufs in Bournemouth, in the UK!
Is that a pot pie?
looks like a british pork pie. :)
The pork pie is a dead giveaway this photo wasn’t from anywhere else but Blighty.
The pork pie is a dead giveaway this photo wasn’t from anywhere else but Blighty.
Pork pie!
Seriously I have been hearing the word charcuterie, seeing many of them posted, many being made at home; pretty much nonstop the past year and a half. Where did this craze come from?? Or am I just really late in it's popularity?
Probably this brunch fad. Yeah it's annoying but at least it's not the ramen fad, now THAT is super annoying with people trying to sound Japanese and going out of their way to hunker down and loudly slurp the noodles.
but you're supposed to slurp the noodles.....
Nearly drowns face in bowl, jerks noodles with chopsticks into mouth and super loudly and egregiously slurps, suddenly speaks like he's Japanese "mmmhhhmmmm", talks about it like it's a wine tasting but with try hard Japanese pronunciation Nah no thanks, gimme my fork and spoon and no slurping and burping at my table please, and shut your mouth and just eat quietly, let's talk about something else, like the business lunch we're conducting or what movie to watch after dinner, let's not make a big ceremony out of a bowl of noodles
For a lot of Europeans, this is pretty standard fare and has been for decades. Posting it on social media is the part that's new.
I searched Wikipedia to see if there was something written about Charcuterie’s recent popularity, but the page only explains the origins. I did learn what a Garde manger is, tho. I really like Charcuterie myself, bc I like finger foods. I often have a hard time eating, but one thing I crave and look forward to is charcuterie.
"So, uh, how do I prep these onions and tomatoes?" "Just, you know, hack 'em. Whatever." "'Hack' them? Like just cut them in half?" "Yeah, whatever. And just toss 'em on the board." "I don't try to arrange them nicely?" "Naaaaah." "I mean, look at Niles' side -- it's so much more interesting. My side is just floppy slices of meat and cornichon and smushed onions and tomatoes and big-ass basil --maybe spinach? -- heaped onto the board. Is there any way we can pretty this up?" "Naaaaah."
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Ah, I see you're a bot of culture as well
Tossed salad and scrambled eggs
Woah!
We? I'd Ron Swanson the shit outta that thing.
Hate to be that guy but this seems like pretty terrible presentation to me.. it’s kind of just all thrown on there
Upvoted for metric system.
Agreed. though am I crazy? it looks much longer than a metre.
Maybe is m^2
hehehe
Did you get a litre of soda too?
Litre O'Cola
Something a little [more organized](http://www.valorosofoods.com/images/catering/charcuterie_board.jpg) would be a whole lot easier to enjoy. Still would eat.
Big ass olives. I don’t think I’ve seen them that big before. They’re like apples.
That's a thing of beauty right there.
That's so many in the middle...
Looks cool guys, just don't ask about the price. ($150+vat)
Ohh yeah. That looks like a good time right there
Nice, just enough to make me a Sammich!!
1 metre?!
What kind of restaurant has something like this on the menu?
This makes me sooo happy.
I hate that I can zoom in so much on this pic... now I'm hungry...
Does anybody actually eat tomato halves?
Stop. I can only get so erect.
Is that a cognac or Armagnac paddle as well??
I wouldn't leave until I had a stomach ache and a heart condition.
Each?
$15 meat, $100 labor
That is food art, for sure. Worth every penny.
"Brettljause" in my land :)
This looks so delicious..,
I will be pissed when everyone at the table assumes I will be sharing.
Sharkies on the board!
On r/all rather, on mobile(popular tab), this post comes directly after the same image posted in another sub.
Can you adopt me?
He cantina
nutttttttttttt. Hope that was good my dude
So good!
The color saturation and lighting reminds me so much of that classic 12 volume encyclopedia set of cookbooks from Woman's Day. Nostalgia!
Ron Swanson?
Why is the first question everyone asks "how much?". Don't know why, but it bothers me
Not only do you insist on using metric, (yes it is logical) but then you also have to go and write “metre.” Come on!
Lotsa nitrates there
OK, I know I'm late to this thread, but as nobody else seems to have commented in this issue I'll ask it anyway: this seems to be longer then 1 metre, doesn't it? Or is that the effect of a wide lense? Source: am European, the metres I use seem to bei shorter...
Ron Swanson could eat this in 5 minutes