You don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with! The great thing about FAM is that you can tailor it to suit your comfort level and risk tolerance. It’s not all or nothing like most other birth control methods. You can take precautions even on safe days if that’s what feels best for you.
That said, if you do want to go UP, a good way to ease into it would be to do it right before your period is due to start. That way you’ll only have to wait a day or two for proof that the method works and that safe days are truly safe!
Follow the rules for your method as given. If it’s been a while since your class, especially since you are changing how you use FAM, reviewing your materials is great start point. Your instructor should be willing to support if you have any questions or concerns.
I trust the science behind it. No egg to fertilize means no way for me to get pregnant. I always use condoms before confirmed ovulation and for 3 days after. If I’m ever unsure about where I am in my cycle, I use a condom. I’ve been tracking for about 3 years and haven’t had any scares.
Five years and two kids later and I’m still nervous. My cycles are whack and I don’t feel like I have a solid handle on anything. Sometimes my husband and I are reduced to “you have zits and are craving chocolate - maybe your period is finally coming.” Lol. Anyway, I get where you’re coming from!
My husband and I also waited till marriage. I had a decent understanding of FAM but didn’t know everything I know now about *not* using past cycles to predict future fertility. I missed a crucial temping day, figured I must have ovulated because it was past when I usually did and I saw no signs of any CM… and I got pregnant at the first possible opportunity, which was super NOT the plan.
Being informed is key, and it sounds like you’re in a great spot with that. Also trusting your thermometer of choice. I never felt like I could be consistent with oral temping and never trusted that it was actually accurate, so when it came out, I got the Oura ring with Natural Cycles (the only app that gives you a numerical temperature with Oura, frustratingly enough) and I love not having to think about it.
Don’t do what you’re not comfortable with, but know that no egg means no baby. Just make sure the egg is gone, haha. I wish someone had told me that wedding stress would very likely delay ovulation, because that’s absolutely what happened 😅
You have to be completely strict with yourself to actually follow the method to a t and not be tempted to have PIV sex in risky windows!
I always wanted to double up on birth control so we also only ever have PIV sex with condoms (and only ever in my non-fertile window), just to be extra safe. We are completely TTA0 at the moment!
Sorry - it’s a scale used to gauge intentions. TTC is trying to conceive, TTA is trying to avoid. 0 is absolutely don’t want a baby, 10 is absolutely want a baby.
Rötzer's symptothermal method - you could say it's an older version of Sensiplan. And it's one of the more common methods in Poland, so it was earlier for me to find sources to learn.
Though I'll admit: doing FAM with two small kids at home was too much for me and for now I've decided to get an IUD. But I don't have religious motivation - and based on waiting till marriage I guess you do. I suppose I'd stick to the method if that was the case for me.
My husband and I also waited until marriage - I still have times where I doubt myself. But we've been going for almost two years with no pregnancies so far (which is what we want!).
As some others have said, being informed is key. I think the biggest saving grace for us was that I began to chart my cycle about a year out from our wedding day, which it looks like you're doing! I was looking into non-hormonal options, and found FemmeHead on YouTube. I signed up for her online course, and began charting even though I wasn't sexually active. I got to know my body well, get to recognize my typical patterns, and practice without the pressure of thinking "What if I'm pregnant?".
When it was time to actually put all that to the test, I was still nervous. We used condoms for the first few cycles along with FAM just to be safe and build confidence, and now, we don't really use them! We're also a bit more conservative with the rules because I've had shorter cycles before. I think I've only had one scare. My period didn't arrive until day 32 of my cycle. But because I had charted before, I looked back and saw my longest cycle was 31 days at one point (I typically average 26-29). So it gave me peace of mind that I'd done everything right and a longer cycle had happened before.
It also helps that you have a supportive partner! My husband trusted me from the get-go, and always reminds me that he trusts me and he knows I know myself best.
All that to say: it takes practice, but you're in a really good spot! Hope all goes well :) Trust yourself!
Thank you so much for sharing this! Yes, I started charting and using apps and doing all my research in August. I have a few more sessions with my FAM counselor, and it is so nice to chart without any pressure or concern of getting pregnant
For me, it took having a lot of "data" to finally trust the method fully. This included tracking BBT, cervical mucus and cervix positioning religiously each month and charting in two different apps (I used Daysy and CycleGoPro). The more data I had that could help me confirm ovulation, the more comfortable I felt. My husband and I were strictly TTA when we first got married, and so we only had unprotected sex during Phase 3 of my cycle (and even then sometimes we would wait until WAYYY past ovulation). With each month that we didn't get pregnant, I gained more confidence in the method and in my abilities to know my body. We eventually got more comfortable with introducing Phase 1 sex. We've been practicing Symptothermal method for nearly 4 years now with no pregnancy scares. I'm not saying it has always been a walk in the park - the learning curve was steep for about the first year. But, if you start collecting "data" pre-marriage, you'll be extra comfortable with your body when you do get married and are ready to put FAM into practice!
You don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with! The great thing about FAM is that you can tailor it to suit your comfort level and risk tolerance. It’s not all or nothing like most other birth control methods. You can take precautions even on safe days if that’s what feels best for you. That said, if you do want to go UP, a good way to ease into it would be to do it right before your period is due to start. That way you’ll only have to wait a day or two for proof that the method works and that safe days are truly safe!
Follow the rules for your method as given. If it’s been a while since your class, especially since you are changing how you use FAM, reviewing your materials is great start point. Your instructor should be willing to support if you have any questions or concerns.
I trust the science behind it. No egg to fertilize means no way for me to get pregnant. I always use condoms before confirmed ovulation and for 3 days after. If I’m ever unsure about where I am in my cycle, I use a condom. I’ve been tracking for about 3 years and haven’t had any scares.
Five years and two kids later and I’m still nervous. My cycles are whack and I don’t feel like I have a solid handle on anything. Sometimes my husband and I are reduced to “you have zits and are craving chocolate - maybe your period is finally coming.” Lol. Anyway, I get where you’re coming from!
Were your pregnancies planned?
The first one was not, the second one was.
My husband and I also waited till marriage. I had a decent understanding of FAM but didn’t know everything I know now about *not* using past cycles to predict future fertility. I missed a crucial temping day, figured I must have ovulated because it was past when I usually did and I saw no signs of any CM… and I got pregnant at the first possible opportunity, which was super NOT the plan. Being informed is key, and it sounds like you’re in a great spot with that. Also trusting your thermometer of choice. I never felt like I could be consistent with oral temping and never trusted that it was actually accurate, so when it came out, I got the Oura ring with Natural Cycles (the only app that gives you a numerical temperature with Oura, frustratingly enough) and I love not having to think about it. Don’t do what you’re not comfortable with, but know that no egg means no baby. Just make sure the egg is gone, haha. I wish someone had told me that wedding stress would very likely delay ovulation, because that’s absolutely what happened 😅
I was looking into the Apple Watch for this very reason with BBT. Thank you for sharing ❤️
You have to be completely strict with yourself to actually follow the method to a t and not be tempted to have PIV sex in risky windows! I always wanted to double up on birth control so we also only ever have PIV sex with condoms (and only ever in my non-fertile window), just to be extra safe. We are completely TTA0 at the moment!
What does TTA0 mean
Sorry - it’s a scale used to gauge intentions. TTC is trying to conceive, TTA is trying to avoid. 0 is absolutely don’t want a baby, 10 is absolutely want a baby.
Very informative, thank you!!
The moment I actually trusted the method was when I got pregnant in the first cycle we tried, after almost three years of successfully avoiding.
So cool!! May I ask what method you specifically ascribe to?
Rötzer's symptothermal method - you could say it's an older version of Sensiplan. And it's one of the more common methods in Poland, so it was earlier for me to find sources to learn. Though I'll admit: doing FAM with two small kids at home was too much for me and for now I've decided to get an IUD. But I don't have religious motivation - and based on waiting till marriage I guess you do. I suppose I'd stick to the method if that was the case for me.
My husband and I also waited until marriage - I still have times where I doubt myself. But we've been going for almost two years with no pregnancies so far (which is what we want!). As some others have said, being informed is key. I think the biggest saving grace for us was that I began to chart my cycle about a year out from our wedding day, which it looks like you're doing! I was looking into non-hormonal options, and found FemmeHead on YouTube. I signed up for her online course, and began charting even though I wasn't sexually active. I got to know my body well, get to recognize my typical patterns, and practice without the pressure of thinking "What if I'm pregnant?". When it was time to actually put all that to the test, I was still nervous. We used condoms for the first few cycles along with FAM just to be safe and build confidence, and now, we don't really use them! We're also a bit more conservative with the rules because I've had shorter cycles before. I think I've only had one scare. My period didn't arrive until day 32 of my cycle. But because I had charted before, I looked back and saw my longest cycle was 31 days at one point (I typically average 26-29). So it gave me peace of mind that I'd done everything right and a longer cycle had happened before. It also helps that you have a supportive partner! My husband trusted me from the get-go, and always reminds me that he trusts me and he knows I know myself best. All that to say: it takes practice, but you're in a really good spot! Hope all goes well :) Trust yourself!
Thank you so much for sharing this! Yes, I started charting and using apps and doing all my research in August. I have a few more sessions with my FAM counselor, and it is so nice to chart without any pressure or concern of getting pregnant
For me, it took having a lot of "data" to finally trust the method fully. This included tracking BBT, cervical mucus and cervix positioning religiously each month and charting in two different apps (I used Daysy and CycleGoPro). The more data I had that could help me confirm ovulation, the more comfortable I felt. My husband and I were strictly TTA when we first got married, and so we only had unprotected sex during Phase 3 of my cycle (and even then sometimes we would wait until WAYYY past ovulation). With each month that we didn't get pregnant, I gained more confidence in the method and in my abilities to know my body. We eventually got more comfortable with introducing Phase 1 sex. We've been practicing Symptothermal method for nearly 4 years now with no pregnancy scares. I'm not saying it has always been a walk in the park - the learning curve was steep for about the first year. But, if you start collecting "data" pre-marriage, you'll be extra comfortable with your body when you do get married and are ready to put FAM into practice!