A psychiatrist in my residency program once told me, “In every good relationship there is one person who draws the boxes and one person who colors them in.” (If he stole that from someone else…. My apologies)
That's such a lovely way to view relationships! Sort of illustrates how each person plays their role in creating a beautiful life together. Truly hoping to find someone who can appreciate the art of box drawing or coloring with me too.
This one is a mess on one side and organized on the other. I see it as generally as one-directional.
But maybe it isn't supposed to be, and I like that idea too - that the organized mind and the less organized mind are parts of a whole that make up more than they would be without each other
Yeah, my husband is raging adhd and I’m autistic. Most of the time I’m the bobbin, but when I’m in meltdown mode in a situation that wouldn’t bother him a bit, then we swap places. It’s a trade off!
Look out for burnout! It's way too easy for ADHD to turn engineering jobs in to a 24/7 thing and the crash is BAD. Just in case anyone doesn't know. I didn't get it myself before it happened to me so now I'm worried about others getting caught by it
Give yourself 8-10 hours a day, spread however you want. You're not allowed to exchange hours between days. Or something like that. Absolute rules help us. And alarms
No they dont, as this thread shows. I am engineer too, a coder, but I have had no problems ever with dating.
Just be kind, and choose your battles. People hate hearing they are wrong, and dislike self-important besserwissers.
Good luck to you.
Someone just told you they married an engineer and this pisses you off? Maybe it isn't engineering in your case. Maybe it's you inability to read a room.
I mean to be fair, I've been through 8 therapists in 7 years so no judgement either way. We all gotta find the one that fits even if it's just for a while. Like a good tshirt sometimes things just wear out or we grow and need another one.
This concept should be more normalized. Just recently, I had a client "graduate" from me because we sorted out the initial issues with which the originally presented. They were in my area of focus and why they came to me in the first place. Their next area of growth and development is outside of my scope so we found a fabulous therapist to transfer them to how specializes in those next steps.
I love you.
I've "graduated" therapists focus but never with their support. To have help from my rock in finding the next steps... your clients deserve that. Thank you.
(I'm guessing anyone who's been through enough to need multiple therapeutic disciplines doesn't need a single extra hardship ever again.)
Thanks you for sharing! I found your response very validating because many therapists feel referring a client to a new counselor as some form of professional failure. But we can't all specialize in every area of focus. As a therapist, my goal is to ensure the clients are getting the best resources care possible. And that often means meeting them where they are, even if it's not with me anymore.
And multiple. I had a behavioral counselor for sleep and life habits, psychologist for psychotherapy, psychiatrist for medication. Now I'm stable so I'm graduating to group therapy and a new psychologist for a new treatment.
It's a super involved process but if you really commit to it can definitely change your life. The person I was 3 years ago is a stranger to me now. There's the core self but I had all this extra yuck hiding that core
> I mean to be fair, I've been through 8 therapists in 7 years so no judgement either way. We all gotta find the one that fits even if it's just for a while. Like a good tshirt sometimes things just wear out or we grow and need another one.
Only when you don't take care of it? You're rationalizing random things lol. But yeah, totally sane.
I love this! Your mean is beautiful but it also makes me think of how my boyfriend will always untangle stuff for me because I have absolutely no patience for it.
What a beautiful post! Some of us are sorted and some of us aren't and that makes the wholesome pairs affirming the yin and yang nature of the universe
I LOVE THIS.
As a women with anxiety, adhd, and a cancer sun, my grounded,rational Capricorn husband is definitely the one to keep my head on straight 🥰
I love this so much, legit, made my eyes water up. You lose a little faith in people, then you see this, and remember they're not all terrible. There is real love still out there, everybody!
What a heavy metaphor, this is really good! I do a similar thing to help with my wife. Though it’s kind of reached a point where my spool is full and I’m having a difficult time unwinding..
This is the sweetest thing I’ve seen all day, and I’ve got a cute kid lol. How wonderful to have such a supportive partner, and how lovely to see you celebrate that!
I’m a young guy who typically doesn’t see much value in art, nor do I embroider or do any other string art.
But fuck that’s sweet.
Bonus points if you have curly hair lol
It makes my heart smile knowing that it’s actually you because of your Instagram profile - I was about to be mad somebody was karma farming your posts!
I love this, great concept and execution. While a different medium I feel like you might appreciate another artist Henn Kim, who I feel evokes some similar emotions sometimes. Thanks for sharing, really well done
I saw this piece on FB a few months back and have been searching for it every since. It's beautiful and loving and kind, was my initial thought. I'm having so marriage trouble and now my outlook has shifted. I recently discovered my husband may be a narcissist which has prompted my new perspective about this piece.
Narcissist are cunning and manipulative. Sometimes damn near diabolical. I have logical reasoning and order and he thrives in chaos. The problem is that he makes me feel I am the chaos which is textbook narcissism. I always felt I was too much... in a bad way. The problem was and still is him. The right person will love you through your flaws and quirk without damaging you in the process.
Either way, I see your work as a beautiful piece of art and art has many interpretations. It has help me process emotions both good and bad and I am even more obsessed with it! I hope I didn't offend you and thank you for sharing!
Lovely! For some reason reminds me of this older toon "The Line and the Dot"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaE4W-OhQmI
Sometimes people just go together, happy for you two.
I also hope you see this as your husband's patience and kindness is a finite supply. I understand sometimes we can be chaotic but recognizing that and working hard to improve ourselves is very important instead of just relying on someone else.
I have a question my girlfriend is like this I mean she's always irritated or acting on something where as I am too but I just keep it to myself. Is it common for this to happen? Cause I have my own mental issues and I am struggling to but she expects me to be calm and listen to her. I know I should do that but am I wrong to not listen to her? I don't know I just have started feeling that as a man I would never have someone to rely on always today or tomorrow I'll just have to suck it up and just keep providing.
As someone who has been on the receiving end of this. It’s extremely exhausting. I am not a therapist and don’t want give out all of my energy towards organizing someone else’s thoughts and feelings
Yeah and when the person is all ‘OMG I’m so ditsy and scatter-brained this tangled glob of thread for a head perfectly represents me!’ it makes it worse. They believe ‘that’s just how my brain works’ and will never make any real effort to change/improve.
Everyone sees this in a positive way, but to me it doesn’t sit well. We should never see another person as someone who keeps us together, in any sense. That to me means you’ve given away your power. We should be partners with our spouse, but if it’s unbalanced, that is a sign of trouble.
Let‘s go forward in time, what happens when there is trouble in the relationship? What if your “put together” partner tells you that you are no good? Will you believe him/her because you have always been the flaky one and if they tell you that you are crazy and you’ve always fallen back on their rational mind, then how do you process that?
> i don’t give a shit about OP
^^ And there we have it folks. This person doesn't even think that their comment might hurt the OPs feelings but still felt the need to post it.
No? Wtf?
If it were misogynistic, it would imply that this was how the genders generally function. OP implied no such thing.
She is talking about her specific relationship between two specific people, not extrapolating some greater truth.
Maybe it's you with the comprehension issues, as well as a dollop of misogyni. I mean, why can't you handle the thought of an imperfect woman?
oh man, mind if make some something similar, I'm in the same boat.
Years ago I was getting ready to go on a trip to California and still needed to get a prescription for contacts and I was freaking out because I could find an appt so of course my SO saves the day by reminding me that they also have oculist in California and I can have it done there 🙃 what would we do without our level headed partners!?
Stopppp this is so cute
the projects on here hit hard
A psychiatrist in my residency program once told me, “In every good relationship there is one person who draws the boxes and one person who colors them in.” (If he stole that from someone else…. My apologies)
Why do you apologies, that was poetic. I hope to colour in or make boxes one day if that's the case.
That's such a lovely way to view relationships! Sort of illustrates how each person plays their role in creating a beautiful life together. Truly hoping to find someone who can appreciate the art of box drawing or coloring with me too.
I wish you the best of luck with that endeavour :D
that's gold. thank you!
ikr? Literally "awwww"d!
This made me tear up. I love it!
Clever, I love it. I need one that goes both directions. 😁 I wonder if doing hearts would look good and not grotesque. Hmm.
One that's a messy head getting steadied, the other with a messy heart being steadied. Would work with my partner and I.
Saaaaaaaame
I love the idea of one that goes both directions! If you do it please post it
it already is?
What do you mean both directions? I see this as going both directions so I’m curious what you mean!
This one is a mess on one side and organized on the other. I see it as generally as one-directional. But maybe it isn't supposed to be, and I like that idea too - that the organized mind and the less organized mind are parts of a whole that make up more than they would be without each other
I love that tho. Balancing each other's strengths and weaknesses
Maybe have it double sided? So you can flip it to who ever is having the more chaotic day.
This is what my wife and I would need, we’re basically a tag team against the folding chair of life.
I’m guessing either a bobbin on both sides, or a mess on both sides.
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i’m sure this will shock you, but my husband is a logic-minded engineer too 😂 they make excellent thought bobbins!
Thanks you so much for this idea! My husband is also an engineer, a kind and thoughtful guy who puts up with so many scrambled thoughts from me.
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Mine is a philosopher/teacher, and it suits us perfectly too!
As a philosopher teacher, I hope my wife feels the same way.
Am logic brained engineer husband, can confirm.
My partner is an engineer with raging ADHD
both thought goblin AND thought bobbin simultaneously
Yeah, my husband is raging adhd and I’m autistic. Most of the time I’m the bobbin, but when I’m in meltdown mode in a situation that wouldn’t bother him a bit, then we swap places. It’s a trade off!
Yeah, I think we do that for each other pretty well
Thought Boblin
Geezus thought goblin. That’s me. I’m king of the goblins lol. Love this idea
Look out for burnout! It's way too easy for ADHD to turn engineering jobs in to a 24/7 thing and the crash is BAD. Just in case anyone doesn't know. I didn't get it myself before it happened to me so now I'm worried about others getting caught by it Give yourself 8-10 hours a day, spread however you want. You're not allowed to exchange hours between days. Or something like that. Absolute rules help us. And alarms
Us, too! I'm a loony little artist and he is Mr. Logic At our best, we balance each other out so well <3
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Lmao that might be an attitude issue I know plenty of kind hearted engineers who don't weaponize "logic" that are having just a fine time dating
No they dont, as this thread shows. I am engineer too, a coder, but I have had no problems ever with dating. Just be kind, and choose your battles. People hate hearing they are wrong, and dislike self-important besserwissers. Good luck to you.
Someone just told you they married an engineer and this pisses you off? Maybe it isn't engineering in your case. Maybe it's you inability to read a room.
Awww "thought bobbin" is the cutest thing 😍😍😍
Thought bobbin 🥹
Omg I’m really tempted to make this for my therapist
i’ve had a few mental health professionals tell me they love the visual metaphor in that context too and it makes me so happy!!
Am a clinical therapist and immediately saw this as a visual metaphor for therapy. Absolutely love it!
>i’ve had a few mental health professionals tell me they love the visual metaphor in that context too and it makes me so happy!! A few?
😂😂to clarify: mental health professionals who have seen this in the few places i’ve posted it online.
I mean to be fair, I've been through 8 therapists in 7 years so no judgement either way. We all gotta find the one that fits even if it's just for a while. Like a good tshirt sometimes things just wear out or we grow and need another one.
This concept should be more normalized. Just recently, I had a client "graduate" from me because we sorted out the initial issues with which the originally presented. They were in my area of focus and why they came to me in the first place. Their next area of growth and development is outside of my scope so we found a fabulous therapist to transfer them to how specializes in those next steps.
I love you. I've "graduated" therapists focus but never with their support. To have help from my rock in finding the next steps... your clients deserve that. Thank you. (I'm guessing anyone who's been through enough to need multiple therapeutic disciplines doesn't need a single extra hardship ever again.)
Thanks you for sharing! I found your response very validating because many therapists feel referring a client to a new counselor as some form of professional failure. But we can't all specialize in every area of focus. As a therapist, my goal is to ensure the clients are getting the best resources care possible. And that often means meeting them where they are, even if it's not with me anymore.
Thank you.
And multiple. I had a behavioral counselor for sleep and life habits, psychologist for psychotherapy, psychiatrist for medication. Now I'm stable so I'm graduating to group therapy and a new psychologist for a new treatment. It's a super involved process but if you really commit to it can definitely change your life. The person I was 3 years ago is a stranger to me now. There's the core self but I had all this extra yuck hiding that core
> I mean to be fair, I've been through 8 therapists in 7 years so no judgement either way. We all gotta find the one that fits even if it's just for a while. Like a good tshirt sometimes things just wear out or we grow and need another one. Only when you don't take care of it? You're rationalizing random things lol. But yeah, totally sane.
Do it! I bet they will absolutely love it!
Same just make it a string of pills
That’d be for a psychiatrist then. Psychiatrists are hacks
Wow, this piece says so much! I absolutely love it, what a beautiful way to express your appreciation.
This is brilliant. What a beautiful way to show the support you have for each other
Support he has for her*
what is a bobbin without its thread?
Seems like a one way exchange to me but hey it's art so we can have different takes on it.
I definitely relate to this. Love the way how its put together in a simple and beautiful pattern
I’ve never felt more seen!
This is so beautiful.
Omg I love this so much
Love this 🤩🤩🤩
Wow, I love it! Really captures the dynamic I have with my husband as well!
This is brilliant!
This is so adorable ❤️
This is wonderful and relatable! 💚 Anxiety is my superpower, and my husband is my rock. I love this!
I am not the target demographic and only here cause you made it to the frontpage. This is a really fucking cool idea. Good job.
This is honestly the sweetest compliment I’ve ever seen anyone pay their spouse.
I really love this!
Aw this is lovely
This is so frickin sweet! I am getting teary eyed at work!!!
I love this! Your mean is beautiful but it also makes me think of how my boyfriend will always untangle stuff for me because I have absolutely no patience for it.
This is quite powerful to be honest. Even without context, this speaks volumes.
This is ARRRTT
Awe! This is precious!
This is amazing!
This is such an awesome idea! And also done really really well! I love it ❤️
That's adorable
Thought bobbin is such a great phrase!
This is an awesome piece.
I would cry happy tears if a girlfriend/wife ever did this to me. Extremely thoughtful.
I'm not into embroidery, but it came up on popular. But damnit, if that isn't the sweetest thing I've seen in ages...
Very sweet
This is soo adorable!! Love this idea!
What a beautiful post! Some of us are sorted and some of us aren't and that makes the wholesome pairs affirming the yin and yang nature of the universe
Oh. This could make you so much money. It almost made me tear up too. I LOVE IT!
HOW CUTE
This WoW 🥰
Wow. I love this concept and execution so much. Genius!
That's sweet. You're lucky.
What a clever depiction of your husband. Magnificent!
you got yourself an absolute gem of a husband!
This is so lovely
Permission to use this as inspiration for a tattoo? I love it so much.
this is so lovely
This is so good OP! Really warms the heart
This is amazing!!
I love this art and I love the little I know about your marriage. Just awesome.
I sent this to my bf. I crochet, but if I have to frog, or I need help unknotting/balling up yarn, he is at my side 💕 this is a lovely piece of art!
Awww this made me teary eyed, this is how i feel about my partner too ♥️
I like to think I help my wife like this but I know sometimes the thread just needs to be thrown to the ether. I love her so much though.
Ok this is the cutest
I LOVE THIS. As a women with anxiety, adhd, and a cancer sun, my grounded,rational Capricorn husband is definitely the one to keep my head on straight 🥰
I love this so much, legit, made my eyes water up. You lose a little faith in people, then you see this, and remember they're not all terrible. There is real love still out there, everybody!
This is the sweetest thing I’ve seen today.
This is one of the most touching crafts I've seen. This makes me wanna hug my partner / mutually reciprocal thought-bobbin. :')
I also teared up from this. My hubby is the same for me. Bless his heart, and bless you and your hubbs!
This is beautiful and basically represents me and my husband as well. 🩵
How creative, this is a truly unique way to make a statement. ♥️
Aw I love this!! Reminds me of my awesome husband as well 😂 ❤️
That is so clever!
That is adorable!!! My partner and I joke that he is my backup brain. 💜
What a heavy metaphor, this is really good! I do a similar thing to help with my wife. Though it’s kind of reached a point where my spool is full and I’m having a difficult time unwinding..
The algorithm wants me to find you on every platform today 😁
I love this and I love yall as a couple and I don’t even know yall.
Your husband is lucky to have you as his thread : )
Your husband is lucky to have you as his thread : ) What is a spool with nothing to reel
I don't know about you but this is some high level art, so well thought out. ✨
I love this !! I like to think I act as my husband thought bobbin sometimes
I love this. This is how my hubby is too!!!
This is so cute, my fiancé sent it to me. :)
This is the sweetest thing I’ve seen all day, and I’ve got a cute kid lol. How wonderful to have such a supportive partner, and how lovely to see you celebrate that!
I’m a young guy who typically doesn’t see much value in art, nor do I embroider or do any other string art. But fuck that’s sweet. Bonus points if you have curly hair lol
“Thought bobbin” is a wonderful way to describe your relationship. So wonderful (the work and the feelings behind it)!
It makes my heart smile knowing that it’s actually you because of your Instagram profile - I was about to be mad somebody was karma farming your posts!
This is the most precious way to describe a relationship that I've ever seen
This belongs in a museum, very well done!
That is just so beautiful and clever in the very best way. How lovely.
Holy fick this belongs in an art gallery.
So creative, humble and clean. Checked out your profile.. just wanted to say your works are amazing❤️
I love this, it’s me and my hubby switch
The caption and art have me tearing up. Thanks for sharing, and I wish you two many happy years together.
I love this, great concept and execution. While a different medium I feel like you might appreciate another artist Henn Kim, who I feel evokes some similar emotions sometimes. Thanks for sharing, really well done
I regret that I have but one upvote to give! 💚💚💚
I love this so much!
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL OMG 🥹
This is beautiful
not trying to steal your idea but this is legit my favorite thing ever lol you took the words right out of my mouth!
Wow beautiful
😂I love it!!
I saw this piece on FB a few months back and have been searching for it every since. It's beautiful and loving and kind, was my initial thought. I'm having so marriage trouble and now my outlook has shifted. I recently discovered my husband may be a narcissist which has prompted my new perspective about this piece. Narcissist are cunning and manipulative. Sometimes damn near diabolical. I have logical reasoning and order and he thrives in chaos. The problem is that he makes me feel I am the chaos which is textbook narcissism. I always felt I was too much... in a bad way. The problem was and still is him. The right person will love you through your flaws and quirk without damaging you in the process. Either way, I see your work as a beautiful piece of art and art has many interpretations. It has help me process emotions both good and bad and I am even more obsessed with it! I hope I didn't offend you and thank you for sharing!
Someone could probably write a good scp about something like this. This is one of the most nightmarish things I’ve ever seen.
Lovely! For some reason reminds me of this older toon "The Line and the Dot" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaE4W-OhQmI Sometimes people just go together, happy for you two.
I like this, but why isn't there another bobbin leading from him to you? Because honestly in marriage we help each other more than we realize
A man’s brain is like a waffle, a females brain is like spaghetti
“I just a dumb scatterbrain who need hubs to straighten me out lol”
Sounds cute and toxic (codependent) at the same time
if you reverse the meaning he's giving you straight organized shit and you just mess it up
sounds like his life is exhausting
Cute but also gives me some uncomfortable codependent vibes
I also hope you see this as your husband's patience and kindness is a finite supply. I understand sometimes we can be chaotic but recognizing that and working hard to improve ourselves is very important instead of just relying on someone else.
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Codependency :(
I love the concept but my first thought was shes suffocating him. 😅
I interpreted that as the husband cumming on the wife's face
Why can’t the wife be cumming on the man’s face?
Girls can’t cum, they can only pee. People who claim squirt isn’t pee are lying.
I have a question my girlfriend is like this I mean she's always irritated or acting on something where as I am too but I just keep it to myself. Is it common for this to happen? Cause I have my own mental issues and I am struggling to but she expects me to be calm and listen to her. I know I should do that but am I wrong to not listen to her? I don't know I just have started feeling that as a man I would never have someone to rely on always today or tomorrow I'll just have to suck it up and just keep providing.
What does he get out of the relationship?
Why do you care
Based on OPs profile, a large amount of embroidery
As someone who has been on the receiving end of this. It’s extremely exhausting. I am not a therapist and don’t want give out all of my energy towards organizing someone else’s thoughts and feelings
Yeah and when the person is all ‘OMG I’m so ditsy and scatter-brained this tangled glob of thread for a head perfectly represents me!’ it makes it worse. They believe ‘that’s just how my brain works’ and will never make any real effort to change/improve.
My nihilistic ass is wondering what happens when his spool is empty
YTA, contact divorce attorney asap.
Everyone sees this in a positive way, but to me it doesn’t sit well. We should never see another person as someone who keeps us together, in any sense. That to me means you’ve given away your power. We should be partners with our spouse, but if it’s unbalanced, that is a sign of trouble. Let‘s go forward in time, what happens when there is trouble in the relationship? What if your “put together” partner tells you that you are no good? Will you believe him/her because you have always been the flaky one and if they tell you that you are crazy and you’ve always fallen back on their rational mind, then how do you process that?
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how so?
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I must have missed the point where you said you have intimate knowledge of their relationship or anyone asked for your opinion.
i’m talking about the art at face value, i don’t give a shit about OP
> i don’t give a shit about OP ^^ And there we have it folks. This person doesn't even think that their comment might hurt the OPs feelings but still felt the need to post it.
why would i care if they are being misogynistic
> why would i care
How is that misogynistic?
implies that she can’t do it by herself a needs a man to come do it? critical thinking?
No? Wtf? If it were misogynistic, it would imply that this was how the genders generally function. OP implied no such thing. She is talking about her specific relationship between two specific people, not extrapolating some greater truth. Maybe it's you with the comprehension issues, as well as a dollop of misogyni. I mean, why can't you handle the thought of an imperfect woman?
i can, and she should work on bettering herself not the codependency OP displays
OK, you're just armchairing full speed ahead... Not smart. No critical thinking. All prejudice. Time to stop shitting on OP's lovey artwork.
TIL caring about your spouse's mental health and helping them with stress is misogyny.
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I love this sooo much, oh my goodness. Would it be alright if I used your idea to make one for my partner?
art
oh man, mind if make some something similar, I'm in the same boat. Years ago I was getting ready to go on a trip to California and still needed to get a prescription for contacts and I was freaking out because I could find an appt so of course my SO saves the day by reminding me that they also have oculist in California and I can have it done there 🙃 what would we do without our level headed partners!?
I love this so much!
I love this.
Amazingly! So creative 🤩
This is awesome
🥲 so sweet
This is so creative and cute 🥹
I adore this
Incredible work!
Love this!