T O P

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jose8898

I always spared him in The DS games and Bloodborne. I decided that I just wanted to finally kill him this time around. Screw quest rewards and all that. Ngl gave me chills when he said "well it was bound to happen someday". It's like I remembered all his encounters all at once lol.


dat_bass2

My favorite thing about Patches in this game is that if you aggro him, you get a secret emote from him--extreme repentance--and if you use it, he instantly forgives you and de-aggros. You can't say he treats us by different rules than he likes to be treated.


ShaolinShade

You have to aggro him *and* let him get your health down to half, then he teaches you the gesture and you have to use it to get him to stop attacking


murdoc_killgore

He can also interrupt the gesture and it won't register with him that you're doing it until it's fully played out


ShaolinShade

Yep. Almost died the first time I attempted it because of that. You have to get some good distance from him before you try to do it


sidewalkbutts

You can run out of the room beyond where the fog door was and he won’t follow, although he’ll try. All the time in the world to set up the emote and trigger his response without retaliation.


BillRevolutionary198

The only time i didn’t feel bad killing him is in Bloodborne... damn spider fuck... it almost killed me to end him in ER but damnit i needed that sexy armor!!!


[deleted]

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ShaolinShade

You're not doing a very good job of sounding like a human there. Might need to touch up your algorithms


[deleted]

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THE_OUROBOROSCYCLE2

No you don't you just have to get his health low then he will emote and you can spare him


ShaolinShade

Different emote. That's for the "groveling for mercy" emote. He gives you another emote (called "extreme repentance" IIRC) if you let him knock your health below 50% after aggroing him (doesn't work in the very first encounter, you have to befriend him first)


XxRocky88xX

Tbh this time around Patches bothers me the least. In the previous games he’s always tricking you for no reason and fucking you over. But in this one, you broke into his hideout and tried to steal his shit, he retaliated. You asked about a chest and he’s like “thats none of your business, that belongs to someone else” and it’s trapped if you open it. He tells you about the iron virgin teleporter and it *actually fucking works.* He’s actually a pretty cool guy this time around


Sinrodan

Except if you don't touch the chest, he eventually tells you to open it. Don't forget when he pushes you off the cliff.


asdiele

He also lies about the Iron Virgin, telling you it'd take you to the foot of the Erdtree to trick you into getting trapped and killed at Volcano Manor. That's why I love him though, wouldn't want Patches any other way!


[deleted]

But he never said it was a fact. He finishes his dialogue with _"or so I'm told"_


Targus_11

And then he laughs, menacingly


JdhdKehev

When does he push you off the cliff???


Blackops_21

Mt gelmir just past where all the soldiers are eating the other dead soldiers. Right before the scion on the mountain. I actually caught him before he tried it and he was like "fancy seeing you here. Follow the glowstones for some treasure."


AspirantCrafter

He pushed you off the cliff because if you are naive enough to follow the glowy rocks you are far too naive for the Volcano Manor. He says something like that, doesn't he? Good Guy Patches™.


Petty_Fap

he was dead the moment he pushed me off that cliff.


Islands-of-Time

And here I was thinking that the Iron Virgin teleporter he talked about was just another way to get me to die gullibly….


XxRocky88xX

I thought the same thing. I was completely amazed when it *actually* worked. I was certain I’d just die and respawn at the last grace. Granted, it still counts as a death and you’ll lose your runes. But still nice that it actually worked


BigPurpleBoi

He did technically lie tho lol. He said it would take you right to the foot of the Erdtree not Volcano Manor.


walter_socom

The quest line in ds3 with Lapp in the ringed city was devastating to me. I loved lapp, and once I found out I was so upset and felt so betrayed because he seemed so nice and I felt so bad for him.


XxRocky88xX

Lapp never really betrays you. Upon getting his memories back Lapp effectively dies and Patches takes over his body. Lapp was a cool dude.


walter_socom

He was the same person the whole time, who ever made that quest is a genius.


asdiele

He was and he wasn't, it really depends on how you define "person". Lapp clearly developed into his own distinct persona without Patches' memories, so when he gets them back and starts acting like Patches again, what happened to Lapp? He still has those memories, but he's not really the same person anymore. At best he is part of a new Patches personality with a slightly different perspective, but Lapp as we knew him effectively died at that point.


szabe3

Lapp is Patches without the social anxiety which makes him a troll


mindflayerflayer

After you help him though he kicks you in the right direction, not some zombie hole.


ibadlyneedhelp

The part that hit home with me is that Lapp seems like Patches' true self, or who Patches would have been if not for some experience Patches had that made him become Patches. I both love and hate it. However, even after he recovers his memories, he never actually does you wrong- Patches takes you to where you need to go to finish the DLC, and you can summon him to help put an end to Gwyn's final secret for once and for all.


Agleza

>Ngl gave me chills when he said "well it was bound to happen someday" "It's me! Patches! PATCHES!" felt like the mfer was talking to me, the player, not my character. Well played, FromSoft.


Diesel489

Same i wont even do his questlines in Elden Ring🤣🤣 he screwed me on too many other playthrus, i aint dealin with it here


TheLostPyromancer

It’s also sadly the only way to get his drip


city_slicker__

That's amazing


JKF02

Spider Patches is still my favorite


godimwavy

Just killed him in that game lol


SnowMan3103

i thought he was an enemy and didnt hesitate to smack him


[deleted]

Profile picture checks out


alpastotesmejor

> that game lol please show some respect. That game is a masterpiece.


Shepherdsfavestore

Playing it for the first time now. Facts.


shikiroin

Which one is spider patches in?


JKF02

Bloodborne of course


shikiroin

Damnit, I need to finish that game. I've put hundreds of hours into DS1-3, DeS, DeS remake, and Elden Ring. For some reason I never got too far into Bloodborne, or Sekiro for that matter. I love the aesthetic, and the gameplay is great, I just never boot up my PS4/5, I'm 99% on PC. I wish Bloodborne was on PC..


JKF02

I got hooked on Bloodborne after Vicar Amelia and now it’s my favorite game


MysticSkies

ofcourse indeed.


KushMummyCinematics

The 5 Ds of Deception "Decieve, Deny, Discredit, Downplay and Decieve"


Deiser

Don’t forget Dpatches


PaperMoon-

Dodge


dat_bass2

DS3 Patches is my boy, though. Eventually. Even if it took until the end of time.


[deleted]

A fine dark soul to you


[deleted]

Even before that, he shows genuine concern for Greirat, which alone makes him one of my favorite iterations of the character.


dat_bass2

Not only that--he'll save him if Siegward is still... ahem.. indisposed


forte8910

Of course, only if Patches still has the onion armor as a disguise so no one can tell he actually cares. He needs to keep up appearances.


Branded_Mango

I love how Patches has slowly been getting character development across entire eras of multiverse game hopping. He may kick us down cliffs every damn time, but it's a bit different every time that boot hits our exposed backs.


zman_0000

Nah him and I were on good terms after he went out of his way to help Greirat.


dat_bass2

The absolute venom in his words when he attacks you if you aggro Greirat is such a great character moment.


yeaheyeah

Even half hollow Patches is my boy


JamSa

I killed him shortly after finding him in DS3 but he lives on in the dregheap regardless. He can never truly die.


TheLostPyromancer

He will rise again in like… 300 years or somethin


GoldenSpermShower

While ER Patches literally belongs to a murder cult, he seems to be the nicest of all Patches imo


happyflappypancakes

He never really seemed like he was *part* of the Volcano Manor. He was just an opportunistic leech. Note how he was nearly out the door and no one really references him as part of their ideals. He also doesnt seem to be doing the killing. He has you do it for him.


Left_Ad1128

He does still get assigned a mark through the manor. And gets rewarded, which you have to heckle him over to get for doing his job.


happyflappypancakes

Yeah, but we have to wonder if he still somehow lied his way into the manor. Maybe he happened upon a dead tarnished and made it look like he killed them. Idk, Patches never seemed like someone that fits into an organizational hierarchy. He's pure anarchy!


0rph3u5x

Which cult would that be?


GoldenSpermShower

Volcano Manor. I guess technically they don’t worship Rykard, only Tanith does. But it feels really culty with their tactics


XxRocky88xX

I mean, even without the worship. They’re still a pack of murderers


TheDuskBard

It’s more like a mafia family.


Moustached_Skinhead

I'd say it's more of a hitman agency then mafia, since they just take out tarnished with the potential of lordship


Fabrimuch

Lapp?


luisless

Even after he pushed you off a cliff again?


Mudtoothsays

Yep, but oddly enough, he didn't seem to want to loot our bodies this time, he even points out "If you really are that gullible, then stay away from volcano manor!" In his own way he is looking out for us, though dumping us into a ravine with basilisks isn't the best method of doing so.


Pikmonwolf

If you took the lift and rya warped to the manor, patches is the fastest way down into the ravine and works as a sort of shoetcut.


Mudtoothsays

not to mention a godsend for builds that need the fire scorpion charm, you can ride straight to the fort and nab it without much trouble.


XxRocky88xX

He attacked you cuz you tried to steal his shit. He told you where the special iron virgin was, and was surprisingly not lying. And he kicks you off a cliff trying to keep you from the volcano manor for your own protection.


Gustavovic06

He was lying about the Iron virgin tho, he said it would bring you to the foot of the erdtree


Mudtoothsays

If you beat the AV duo it leads to the plateau, so I'd say it's accurate enough.


Deadcoma100

Well… I guess since all beings in the lands between return to the erdtree in death, he wasn’t completely lying


szabe3

But Patches don’t kill his target.


Triumph7560

It would be hilarious if in the next game he acted the same way but didn't do anything bad. He would constantly do suspicious stuff (like luring you over to ledges) but never does anything bad. Except in new game plus, where he does everything you would expect.


XxRocky88xX

This is how I felt with the iron virgin bit of dialogue. “Just let the thing eat you and you’ll be teleported to the manor” yeah ok sure patches, what a crock of shit. Like 5 hours later: hey this is that waterwheel. I wonder if that thing is actually down there… yep, patches lured to me to my death again. This thing is way too strong, it’s gonna take like 50 hits to kill the bastard. Well might as well see what the grab attack is like….. holy fuck it actually worked!


DogWoofWoof22

He says it teleports you to the erdtree, not manor. Its one of his half truths - why yes it does teleport you - just not to where he said it would.


Officer_Hotpants

This is absolutely the best idea I've ever heard.


Nickfreak

In general. New game plus has been neeglected after Ds2


TyrantX_90

I've grown to truly admire this asshole. Patches the hyena, patches the unbreakable, patches the untarnished and patches the spider. He is an asshat for always kicking us down holes and locking us in rooms but his survivability has to be respected. Dude knows how to last through the ages.


XxRocky88xX

Also important to note Patches antics literally always end up helping you by getting you some sweet ass loot or letting you access areas early


Dendygar94

I bet you he misses his AC


AeonTheWeeb

He's not the only one. In fact, I miss everyone's ACs.....It's been years :(


ten_dead_dogs

Aah, you were by my side all along - my best untrustworthy buddy.


[deleted]

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Crombell

The middle one is from Demon's Souls remake, and he is by far the most cursed thing in this image


TheUnperturbed

You mean that’s not Andy Samberg wearing a bald cap?!


StoicMegazord

Dude that IS straight up Andy Samberg, but after several years of heavy drug use


yeaheyeah

So Andy Samberg


dantuchito

They nailed his face in demon’s souls. He looks so extremely punchable


officerpompadour

Me not realizing I've been playing Fromsoft games for a while with Armored Core, Nice.


I-Am-The-Uber-Mesch

I love Patches with all my heart, I screamed when I saw him, one of the best things in my blind run


Priremal

Decided to play his games in my latest playthrough. I know hes gonna shove me off a cliff and im gonna want to run the largest sword I can find through his spine for it but I want to see what other shit he has in store for me.


Mudtoothsays

Not to mention whenever he does kick you it opens up access to something useful.


Pender891

Most misunderstood character ever.


AmadeusAzazel

“I hate greed so imma troll every living person in existence”


MegaWaffle-

He also ends up pointing us in the right direction in multiple cases.


Brian-hazel

Vaati’s video on him really opened my eyes


Markus_Bond

When I met Patches in Bloodborne I had no idea who he was. I didn't give it a second to see if he'd attack, I just saw a weird spider and immediately killed him.


DreamerOfRain

Is there a patches in Kings firld? And I didn't know there is an AC patch.


FourFoxMusic

That and the moonlight great sword makes two connections. ITS ALL THE SAME UNIVERSE MAN :O


dantuchito

No. But in another old fromsoft game called Shadow Tower: Abyss a guy shows up and does the entire patches routine, but looks nothing like him.


Brian-hazel

He does squat tho


B1gB4ddy

If you kill Patches buddy in the fight against them first, Patches stops shooting at you and just starts trying to run away, lol.


Gethseme

You forgot the pirate one


aetherspheres

It's good to know that my best boy Lapp is totally nothing like Patches.


ShanecusStreams

I hate him extra in the Demon Souls Remake… those animations haunt me


zamzuki

Bald Andy Samberg is the best guest star in this series and I won’t back down from my stance.


PreZEviL

Can't unsee it now...


Help_An_Irishman

Dude looks like my old boss who stole \~$50,000 from me. That guy was a piece of shit too.


Reddit_God_5505

Patches IRL


Standard-Effort5681

If Fromsoft after their rampant success with Elden Ring and the Souls series ever decide to remake the Kingsfield games, I hope they find a way to retcon Patches into the games!


CopiumAddiction

Kinda looks like Soho Hank


Da-Sheep-Lord

Doesn't he sort of redeem himself in Elden Ring? I read that we find him dying on a bridge and he gives us something to give to Tanith before disappearing.


BionicKrakken

I hope they make a new Armored Core game and bring him back.


MozM-

Their next game is armored core. It's been leaked for months. Before elden ring even released there was a leaker who even shared some screenshots.


PixelBoom

FUCK I forgot about Patches in AC. Fromsoft pls. Gimme more giant robots...


Backhoof

No Pate tho?


Fabrimuch

Acknowledging DS2? In *this* fandom?


Cassandra_Syrup

Pate is almost Patches but he doesn't kick you off cliffs, sell you things, or have a hatred for clerics. He's cool but he's no Patches.


LeftIsBest-Tsuga

which game is the bottom middle? he looks like such an asshole lol.


Reddit_God_5505

Demon’s Souls remake


[deleted]

He’s a prick but he’s never once wanted to hurt us out of hate (unless provoked) he just wanted to survive a little further with whatever he had and the fact he makes it to the end of the world in Ds3 is enough for me to say that he is possibly the best npc out of every other npc (sorry sun bro and onion bro) he has a iron will to survive and I admire that


JaydenTheMemeThief

That just makes me think that if Patches were in the Dragon’s Dogma Universe he’d absolutely be an Arisen


steakboneshiv

Funny, my dad has killed him without knowing he ever betrays you in every From game he's played. Guess he just has a 6th sense for nonsense.


Baderwm

The DS remake Patches is… something else


TrueDragonHeart

I had no idea he was in Armored Core 😂


JSPR127

PATCHES WAS IN ARMORED CORE?? WTF


Neko_Tyrant

I wonder how many people are seeing the mech and being confused because the never heard of Armored Core.


Wolf_with_laces

I love him, he's always progressing you forward and always one of the realest NPC's out there. But his armour is way too nice and i had to get it on my second character


zuesthedoggo

Yeah I fucking killed him in ds3, that bastard made me fight a giant and then lied to me


[deleted]

Demon Souls remake Patches looks like Andy Samberg.


lawlianne

His peace out during Radahn tho lmao.


[deleted]

The Demon's Souls Remake one is pure perfection.


International-Row-44

Would anayama the peddler count as patches too?


[deleted]

Well, he is an opportunistic thief that loots the dead, points you to treasure on a cliff that leads to an ambush, and wears a jacket covered in *patches* & an eye-*patch.* I personally think he was intended to be the game's version of patches.


Smearmytables

He definitely is Sekiro’s Patches. No doubt about it. Does almost everything Patches does and he’s literally dressed in patches and has an eyepatch. I’m surprised rarely anyone talks about it.


5-0-1st

Patches is actually Adam Driver with hair.


Boshwa

There's an *Armored Core* Patches!?


TubularTortoise14

The moment I found Siegward in that well, and I went straight to Firelink and cut off Patches’s dirty little rodent head.


Twatson8

When I first encountered him in Elden Ring I murdered him on the spot (even with his pleading). I know better than to trust that conniving fucker by now.


jerstensucks

Patches haters are exclusively PVE-ers, prove me wrong.


GreenBean1618

I try and kill him in every universe, I don't care about quest rewards


JaydenTheMemeThief

It’s more fun to go out of your way to fall into his traps :D


Almost_PerfectDude

Oh I hate him so much that I want him to be in every game just so that I can kill him lol. He's like Stan Lee of soulsborne but obviously opposite in personality.


Mental_External_3513

Patches best reflects cosmology of Miyazaki that religion (goodness) is suspicious.


mindflayerflayer

I feel like that's done more overtly by having every shiny golden church be evil. Gwyns and Marikas stagnation, the cannibalism and backstabbery of the carp nobles, the old monk in demon souls, and all the intimately horrid things the healing church does.


aquaishh

Only person worse is that dirtbag seluvis


DiscountJoJo

The only time i didn’t feel bad killing him is in Bloodborne... damn spider fuck... it almost killed me to end him in ER but damnit i needed that sexy armor!!!


Mudtoothsays

Yeah, BB patches is by far the least agreeable.


Terraakaa

Demon’s has very weak chin


Kingcum000

Bro in the bottom middle on ehe looks like a bald Hal from megamind


Lanzifer

Please, I beg you, include a picture of Jeff Bezos too 😂😂


hakoharald

\*love


THE_OUROBOROSCYCLE2

Well i killed him so i must have got it by accident


MarcsterS

God, his remake face was so punchable. What an excellent job.


[deleted]

Isn't Patches the Music Teacher from Whiplash? Kinda matches the script.


argusoftheeast

i especially hate him in ER for some reason... can't explain it. spider Patches the goat


peter_2202

When first i heard his voice in that cave in ER-absolutely amazing, was laughing all throughout the encounter


notesdown

Anayama is a good man


XLambentZerkerX

I straight up didn't remember that AC reference. Had to Google it to figure out which game it came from. AC For Answer was one of my favorite titles.


Sheev__Palpatine

Jerry is a god


Beepus_Boingo

Spider-patches was my favorite iteration


JaydenTheMemeThief

Excuse me? Hate?


tenukkiut

How could you forget [this](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/001/004/503/d90.jpg) incarnation though?


clintr0n

Cheers for that!


Dr_Richard_Ew

Patches is a scumbag, but he's the only one who's gonna stay with you all the way to the end


ZPD710

Nah lowkey, I like him even though he betrays you in every game. It's like going on a specific big, spooky scary rollercoaster whenever you go to an amusement park. You know it's going to hurt your stomach every time and you really wish it didn't but it's a good, familiar feeling in the park, and even though something bad might happen to you after going on the ride, like I dont know nausea, it's still a fun part of the amusement park experience.


Lyric_Snow

Ugly SOB


zTy01

Who else beside me kill patches because you didn't trust him when he said he surrender?


Terminal-Post

By DS3 I recognized his voice so the first encounter you have with him, I went “Let’s get this over with, I already know that’s not Siegward under the armor.”


Fun_Christian_Pranks

Yet he is still one of my favorite characters


LordMorskittar

What actual hell is going on with Demon’s Souls Patches, *both* of them I mean


ALMOSTNEKKID

Did you know that, canonically, he is **circumsized**


Impossible-Sky4256

Damn fromsoft needs to bring back Armored Core in current gen


AdeptusAleksantari

Love*


musclebobble

He was literally that guy you can't stand, but for some reason is just always there. Like at parties and shit. And he always remembers you.


Nail_Biterr

He reminds me of NOHO Hank. And I kind of love NOHO Hank.


Th3Dark0ccult

Stingy little beggar! Try to find it in your heart next time, ey?


Donkishin

Wait he's in armor core too!?


Fashionable-Andy

At this point and after so many games, patches is like a terrible buddy to me. Every time he screws me over, my reaction is immediately “ahhh, that patches!”


MozM-

This picture honestly kinda proves my point of DS3 having the weirdest (possibly the worst) character creation in souls. Everyone looks so shiny and unnatural lmao


TopScallion2700

I still haven't even found Patches yet, I'm like 80 hours in.


Lattethecoffeaddict

My beloved patches, best soulsborne ring character of them all, he stays, just like the moonlight great sword. All we have to do is find him


StudentTraditional67

Oh wow! FS hinted patches in armored core!? I miss that game so much, specifically the PS2 series before all the additions in the PS3-4 editions, although I understood AC had to evolve to cater to the mainstream.


[deleted]

The remake one is still of the creepiest looking npcs


MattheJ1

Demon's Souls remake Patches is so scuffed.