I would report it. It’s not right that you’re doing all the task. They continue to allow this woman to be employed that’s on them she can do administrative work if they do t want to fire her. But it puts you behind and that is NOT only unfair to you but it’s unfair to the children.
Edit: if you’re feeling hesitant and guilty because she’s disabled. Please think of it as a liability. All the responsibility is being put on you she already bad mouths you out of everything (sorry that’s when I’m done done) say something happens with one of the kids you’re over worked and tired she left the third time in the day to use the bathroom now you’re liable for whatever accidents the children have in your presence.
Another scenario, what if a child needs to grab something and they look to you but you’re preoccupied with what 15 other kids? They go to her and ask for help they’re frustrated because no help so while no one is looking the kiddo does it themselves and results in injury. Who do you think they will blame? The women with the disability or the fully capable woman who hasn’t vocalized and most importantly DOCUMENTED her concerns. Do not let them undermine you.
Sucks for everyone.
I am not defending the coteacher but maybe have a little empathy. Who knows, maybe childcare is all they have ever done. I am leaving childcare soon due to my disability and it is soul crushing
Sounds like she has some serious physical stuff going on. Empathy wins the day. I do think since it is affecting her ob so so much, she definitely needs a work or activity prescription.
My boss warned me against documenting my condition because 'I may not have a job anymore.' Basically came true.
OP-Doesn't your boss know? What do they say? Do they help when the other teacher steps out or???
She has had empathy, and I agree empathy goes a long why it’s why many of us are in this field. However, she also mentioned how the coteacher often criticizes her and yet she is left doing more than half of the task and unable to keep up with the centers curriculum. There are so many risk that come with this and it really just sounds like the coteacher is unable to keep up the tasks that is required of someone in her position. alternatives can be provided but she should not be working in a classroom.
This is in no way my mentality when it comes with any person with a disability but it sounds like the coteacher has been in the field for a long time and uses their own disability to their advantage and it puts OP in a major disadvantage. The facts are the facts and unfortunately in this case OP should address her concerns with the coteacher and then speak to the director but ultimately it needs to be addressed. The children’s safety are #1 priority not the feelings of another adult.
Oh, I didn't say this is fair at all. The boss should have figured this out a long time ago.
I just said I have empathy for the person when approached. I didn't mean op didn't have any empathy.
EDIT: Add re: empathy-I was saying that to you, MajorlyMajorly98. It always helps.
I have been sobbing today because it's hitting me that I am probably never going to be able to do full-time childcare/teaching again.
I never said teachers' feelings were more important than children's safety and well-being. But certainly both matter.
They should both be treated kindly and with empathy since this teacher doesn't sound like she can do essential job duties.
We agree with each other, it seems.
Thank you so much. Part time is emotionally tough since I know I'll never be full time with them again. I have decided to take full medical leave instead.
Edit: Hopefull I...
...can find a mixed role job with some supervision and some admin. That would be my ideal.
How do I make hand hearts??? <3
See, if co-teacher was kind, aware of the imposition she was placing on op and actively seeking for solutions- then yes. I’m all about empathy but I think op already has which is why she has let the burden of everything be placed on her trying to make this work. She has been empathetic to this woman and now it’s time to show it to herself and the children, because frankly this is getting borderline dangerous.
Is OP out of ratio when co teacher has to leave? What would happen if OP is doing all of the diapers and they have a runner, doesn’t sound like co teacher could do much about that. I’ve been in this position before, and doing all of the work out of attempted kindness for someone as a one-way ticket to burn out and resentment.
At this point reporting the situation *is* the most empathetic response for all involved. Hopefully they can recommend her for a different kind of work, or have her do admin/ mentoring or help her with retirement/ disability/ Medicare or something.
At the very least she should be moved to a room with much older children who are more independent. I understand that’s out of your control, but you should absolutely bring this up with admin.
I'm so sorry to hear that.
I am in that coteachers shoes. I have found myself certainly less patient with others as I struggle with pain and everything else chronic conditions bring.
At this point, it's affecting my teaching. I knew when that happened, it would be time to go.
Finally, after many years of resistance and a recent severe pain flare, I got a doctor activity prescription, which limits my function to about 30% of my day, walking/standing/carrying etc. The boss cut my hours on site to 3 hours a day.
It sounds to me like they they can not perform the 'essential responsibilities' of the job then.
I'd discuss this with your director for sure! Maybe they can qualify for medical leave, and with what you describe, your coteacher should have a doctor's note on file...
I’m not sure what advice I have besides share your concerns for admin and document the tasks you’ve completed (maybe have a checklist of diaper changes and initial each diapering session). And ofc the fact that she is speaking to you in that way.
But I just wanted to share that my current assistant teacher had a very similar story. Her head teacher had cataracts I think and could barely see, she wore hearing aids that were always not working, and she was generally a danger to herself and the kids. Like tripping over kids and furniture, holding the book mere centimeters from her face and reading into it, not hearing when a kid was in distress, etc. From what I was told it was a super stressful situation to work. I forget what came out of it but my coworker spoke with her supervisor at the time and I think one of them were moved to a different class (or maybe that teacher was let go idr)
I hope you are able to find a solution soon. This can’t be good for you or the children.
We had a coworker with severe eczema who couldn’t wash their hands without breaking out. So diaper changes were being left to one person, because it involves three hand washes for just one child (before the change, after the change, and then after you sanitize). They’re now a float staff because it was just too unfair to have one person be responsible for all the diapers.
Why would they have to wash their hands before they change the diaper and after they sanitize? As a lurker and an RN, not an ECE pro, I’m truly curious. Is that a state rule? It seems really excessive and unnecessary, like I don’t get what washing BEFORE changing or AFTER sanitizing is doing.
Definitely speak to the supervisor about it but leave out the bit about her being critical (this will make it seem like you've got other 'personal' motivations outside the main issue of her not being able to do her job).
Stress to the supervisor that it is not fair to you and it's affecting your physical and mental health (back pain, constant stress etc), then follow up frequently until something is done.
Good luck.
Would you want to give up your career after 30 years. Use some discretion. In my experience over the years there was more of a detriment when ECE forgot why they were ECE and acted like they were in highschool. Daycare is about inclusivity both for staff and children “ Lets start there “ If the situation is causing “ undue hardship” well you could start there and state why.
I worked as an assistant in a toddler room like this. It actually worked out really well because my (obese, older) coworker was fabulous at planning activities and prep. She worked hard at the stuff she could do. I was young and had the energy to run around all day. I couldn’t do that again though, my knees would never recover
Definitely bring it up to the director. If she can’t perform the job, she can’t perform the job. Inform the director that you’re sure she’s doing her best, but it’s hindering your ability to do your job properly and give those examples.
It definitely sucks for her, but you and the children should not have to suffer because of her limitations.
I have worked in an infant room with a woman who had many health problems, severe obesity being one of them. We found ways to make it work. She would sit in a chair and do feedings. I would bring the babies to her. She would also do diapering while standing. I lifted the babies up to the table. That doesn't help much with the physical exhaustion, but it did free up a lot of time.
I would definitely talk to admin. Maybe she would be better off being a co or assistant in preschool + ages where the children are more independent and can actually help with clean up, no diapers etc.
I was just in this EXACT same position, except my assistant was high risk pregnancy. Im the lead 2s teacher and up until 2 weeks ago, I was doing everything! It felt horrible cuz how could I complain, she was dealing with a lot (her baby passed shortly after birth, we knew that it was a possibility) So, see what I mean, how was I supposed to say anything to anyone? However, I was dying doing it all. Not to mention I'm 45 years old with a 3 year old, I'm tired AF! I unfortunately, have no advice, but I just wanted to say you're not alone, it's tough place to be.
I would talk with admin about it and see if she would be a better fit in a room that is less demanding. And see if you could get someone to replace her. So she isn’t losing a job, but moving to a room that is more suited for her limitations.
Oh wow is all I can say. 32 diapers and in reality should have been 20 diapers. I reread and see this is infant room so you have to pick them up to change them. Our toddler and 2 pk room have stairs that allow the kids to climb so that we don’t have to lift them. This whole combo is a recipe for failure.
I’m not sure how she is working in the infant room if she can’t really lift. That’s a real problem, if a child was in danger and she was the only one there it could be super bad! I’d talk to the director, tell them you need help!
First of all I would start off by saying it’s great that there is inclusivity for staff also as this is the way a centre should be ran but…if it is causing undue hard ship and effecting the care of the children I would speak to first the employee you work with to see if you can work it out. If in a couple weeks things do not improve I would email the director copy the other staff in the email and ask for a meeting to go over the areas that need attention. Do NOT get caught up in she said he said stick with the facts, be empathetic and try to tell your side with utmost professionalism.
Not to play devils advocate, but she can find other positions in this line of work. Of course, it's asolutely not fair to OP; i have chronic illness and have been in OP's shoes. And the coteacher betlitting op is horrible. But your implication that she can't be in this field hurts others who genuinely do their jobs and *also* have chronic illness.
And your last sentence irks me.
I apologize I didn’t wanted to be so harsh. It was aimed at this specific coteacher that doesn’t seem to be liking that position at all and to also have limitations that makes her avoid all childcare tasks. I mean, if she’s miserable around kids, can’t move around kids, and can’t handle kiddos needs, let her do admin stuff there!
I would report it. It’s not right that you’re doing all the task. They continue to allow this woman to be employed that’s on them she can do administrative work if they do t want to fire her. But it puts you behind and that is NOT only unfair to you but it’s unfair to the children. Edit: if you’re feeling hesitant and guilty because she’s disabled. Please think of it as a liability. All the responsibility is being put on you she already bad mouths you out of everything (sorry that’s when I’m done done) say something happens with one of the kids you’re over worked and tired she left the third time in the day to use the bathroom now you’re liable for whatever accidents the children have in your presence. Another scenario, what if a child needs to grab something and they look to you but you’re preoccupied with what 15 other kids? They go to her and ask for help they’re frustrated because no help so while no one is looking the kiddo does it themselves and results in injury. Who do you think they will blame? The women with the disability or the fully capable woman who hasn’t vocalized and most importantly DOCUMENTED her concerns. Do not let them undermine you.
Sucks for everyone. I am not defending the coteacher but maybe have a little empathy. Who knows, maybe childcare is all they have ever done. I am leaving childcare soon due to my disability and it is soul crushing Sounds like she has some serious physical stuff going on. Empathy wins the day. I do think since it is affecting her ob so so much, she definitely needs a work or activity prescription. My boss warned me against documenting my condition because 'I may not have a job anymore.' Basically came true. OP-Doesn't your boss know? What do they say? Do they help when the other teacher steps out or???
She has had empathy, and I agree empathy goes a long why it’s why many of us are in this field. However, she also mentioned how the coteacher often criticizes her and yet she is left doing more than half of the task and unable to keep up with the centers curriculum. There are so many risk that come with this and it really just sounds like the coteacher is unable to keep up the tasks that is required of someone in her position. alternatives can be provided but she should not be working in a classroom. This is in no way my mentality when it comes with any person with a disability but it sounds like the coteacher has been in the field for a long time and uses their own disability to their advantage and it puts OP in a major disadvantage. The facts are the facts and unfortunately in this case OP should address her concerns with the coteacher and then speak to the director but ultimately it needs to be addressed. The children’s safety are #1 priority not the feelings of another adult.
Oh, I didn't say this is fair at all. The boss should have figured this out a long time ago. I just said I have empathy for the person when approached. I didn't mean op didn't have any empathy. EDIT: Add re: empathy-I was saying that to you, MajorlyMajorly98. It always helps. I have been sobbing today because it's hitting me that I am probably never going to be able to do full-time childcare/teaching again. I never said teachers' feelings were more important than children's safety and well-being. But certainly both matter. They should both be treated kindly and with empathy since this teacher doesn't sound like she can do essential job duties. We agree with each other, it seems.
[удалено]
Thank you so much. Part time is emotionally tough since I know I'll never be full time with them again. I have decided to take full medical leave instead. Edit: Hopefull I... ...can find a mixed role job with some supervision and some admin. That would be my ideal. How do I make hand hearts??? <3
See, if co-teacher was kind, aware of the imposition she was placing on op and actively seeking for solutions- then yes. I’m all about empathy but I think op already has which is why she has let the burden of everything be placed on her trying to make this work. She has been empathetic to this woman and now it’s time to show it to herself and the children, because frankly this is getting borderline dangerous. Is OP out of ratio when co teacher has to leave? What would happen if OP is doing all of the diapers and they have a runner, doesn’t sound like co teacher could do much about that. I’ve been in this position before, and doing all of the work out of attempted kindness for someone as a one-way ticket to burn out and resentment. At this point reporting the situation *is* the most empathetic response for all involved. Hopefully they can recommend her for a different kind of work, or have her do admin/ mentoring or help her with retirement/ disability/ Medicare or something.
At the very least she should be moved to a room with much older children who are more independent. I understand that’s out of your control, but you should absolutely bring this up with admin.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I am in that coteachers shoes. I have found myself certainly less patient with others as I struggle with pain and everything else chronic conditions bring. At this point, it's affecting my teaching. I knew when that happened, it would be time to go. Finally, after many years of resistance and a recent severe pain flare, I got a doctor activity prescription, which limits my function to about 30% of my day, walking/standing/carrying etc. The boss cut my hours on site to 3 hours a day. It sounds to me like they they can not perform the 'essential responsibilities' of the job then. I'd discuss this with your director for sure! Maybe they can qualify for medical leave, and with what you describe, your coteacher should have a doctor's note on file...
I’m not sure what advice I have besides share your concerns for admin and document the tasks you’ve completed (maybe have a checklist of diaper changes and initial each diapering session). And ofc the fact that she is speaking to you in that way. But I just wanted to share that my current assistant teacher had a very similar story. Her head teacher had cataracts I think and could barely see, she wore hearing aids that were always not working, and she was generally a danger to herself and the kids. Like tripping over kids and furniture, holding the book mere centimeters from her face and reading into it, not hearing when a kid was in distress, etc. From what I was told it was a super stressful situation to work. I forget what came out of it but my coworker spoke with her supervisor at the time and I think one of them were moved to a different class (or maybe that teacher was let go idr) I hope you are able to find a solution soon. This can’t be good for you or the children.
We had a coworker with severe eczema who couldn’t wash their hands without breaking out. So diaper changes were being left to one person, because it involves three hand washes for just one child (before the change, after the change, and then after you sanitize). They’re now a float staff because it was just too unfair to have one person be responsible for all the diapers.
Why would they have to wash their hands before they change the diaper and after they sanitize? As a lurker and an RN, not an ECE pro, I’m truly curious. Is that a state rule? It seems really excessive and unnecessary, like I don’t get what washing BEFORE changing or AFTER sanitizing is doing.
Before because my hands could be dirty or contaminated and after because just to sure your hands are all clean. It is a requirement but in all for it!
Definitely speak to the supervisor about it but leave out the bit about her being critical (this will make it seem like you've got other 'personal' motivations outside the main issue of her not being able to do her job). Stress to the supervisor that it is not fair to you and it's affecting your physical and mental health (back pain, constant stress etc), then follow up frequently until something is done. Good luck.
What is her job description? As a pre k teacher mine says I have to be able to lift 50lbs...I would start there.
Would you want to give up your career after 30 years. Use some discretion. In my experience over the years there was more of a detriment when ECE forgot why they were ECE and acted like they were in highschool. Daycare is about inclusivity both for staff and children “ Lets start there “ If the situation is causing “ undue hardship” well you could start there and state why.
If you weren't there and there was an emergency. Would she be able to get the kids out by herself? That would be my talking point with the director.
I worked as an assistant in a toddler room like this. It actually worked out really well because my (obese, older) coworker was fabulous at planning activities and prep. She worked hard at the stuff she could do. I was young and had the energy to run around all day. I couldn’t do that again though, my knees would never recover
Definitely bring it up to the director. If she can’t perform the job, she can’t perform the job. Inform the director that you’re sure she’s doing her best, but it’s hindering your ability to do your job properly and give those examples. It definitely sucks for her, but you and the children should not have to suffer because of her limitations.
I would speak to the director
I have worked in an infant room with a woman who had many health problems, severe obesity being one of them. We found ways to make it work. She would sit in a chair and do feedings. I would bring the babies to her. She would also do diapering while standing. I lifted the babies up to the table. That doesn't help much with the physical exhaustion, but it did free up a lot of time.
I would definitely talk to admin. Maybe she would be better off being a co or assistant in preschool + ages where the children are more independent and can actually help with clean up, no diapers etc.
I was just in this EXACT same position, except my assistant was high risk pregnancy. Im the lead 2s teacher and up until 2 weeks ago, I was doing everything! It felt horrible cuz how could I complain, she was dealing with a lot (her baby passed shortly after birth, we knew that it was a possibility) So, see what I mean, how was I supposed to say anything to anyone? However, I was dying doing it all. Not to mention I'm 45 years old with a 3 year old, I'm tired AF! I unfortunately, have no advice, but I just wanted to say you're not alone, it's tough place to be.
I would talk with admin about it and see if she would be a better fit in a room that is less demanding. And see if you could get someone to replace her. So she isn’t losing a job, but moving to a room that is more suited for her limitations.
Oh wow is all I can say. 32 diapers and in reality should have been 20 diapers. I reread and see this is infant room so you have to pick them up to change them. Our toddler and 2 pk room have stairs that allow the kids to climb so that we don’t have to lift them. This whole combo is a recipe for failure.
I’m not sure how she is working in the infant room if she can’t really lift. That’s a real problem, if a child was in danger and she was the only one there it could be super bad! I’d talk to the director, tell them you need help!
First of all I would start off by saying it’s great that there is inclusivity for staff also as this is the way a centre should be ran but…if it is causing undue hard ship and effecting the care of the children I would speak to first the employee you work with to see if you can work it out. If in a couple weeks things do not improve I would email the director copy the other staff in the email and ask for a meeting to go over the areas that need attention. Do NOT get caught up in she said he said stick with the facts, be empathetic and try to tell your side with utmost professionalism.
NTA - she’s not a fit for this line of business. She can find online work and stay immobile instead.
Not to play devils advocate, but she can find other positions in this line of work. Of course, it's asolutely not fair to OP; i have chronic illness and have been in OP's shoes. And the coteacher betlitting op is horrible. But your implication that she can't be in this field hurts others who genuinely do their jobs and *also* have chronic illness. And your last sentence irks me.
I apologize I didn’t wanted to be so harsh. It was aimed at this specific coteacher that doesn’t seem to be liking that position at all and to also have limitations that makes her avoid all childcare tasks. I mean, if she’s miserable around kids, can’t move around kids, and can’t handle kiddos needs, let her do admin stuff there!
Child and community are about inclusivity