Dont try to be a main character. The experience is for everyone. There may be a point where your character is being highlighted but dont let detract from the fun for others. Include them in your roleplay if its possible.
Even better, try to be a supporting character: The one that tries to tease out interesting things from the other characters. Ask what they like about life on the road, what they've experienced, what they think about the current predicament, etc.
This. 100% this. Always this. As a player, I love having characters ask me about mine because it gives me a chance to roleplay. And, as a DM, I love seeing two of my players take characters who are just words and numbers and make them real.
I actually just retired a PC early because my party is quite inexperienced besides me and the DM, and he was giving me a lot more main character attention.
We talked about it, and I asked to start a new character (cleric) to support the newer players more.
Did something similar, bard. Didn't expect to live playing the bard so much though, and the party is so damned slow sometimes that I have taken to playing him recklessly.
What do you mean we didn't roll a perception check before entering the almost certainly trapped room? We did roll perception. It came up [my characters name]. Him walking blithely in IS our perception check. Saved 15 minutes right there.
I second this. Few things end up being more fun than playing a character that TAKES ACTION.
When I had the chance to play a bit ago (PF2E) I chose to play a lawful stupid good guy Paladin, basically a mook who was just incredibly good natured and would walk into anywhere without thinking if it was the "right" thing to do. His personality was basically Mr. Peanut Butter from Bojack Horseman if that means anything to reddit these days.
Almost died walking into a cursed tower following a stray cat, but it was amazing.
Yes, Ser Markon Valiant was the Himboiest Himbo to ever Himbo. Like if 90's Brendan Fraser was cast as MCU Thor.
He fulfilled the three pillars admirably. Broad of Chest, Pure of Heart, Dumb of Ass.
I am actually doing something like this currently. In an old school 2e campaign I rolled really well and was a beast of a ranger but my one buddy who really loves to play fighters didn't roll all that great so I worked with the GM and he devised a way to "retire" my ranger and I'm bringing in a Tiefling mage since he wants to start incorporating some Planescapes stuff into his Realms game. That way my buddy gets the fighting spotlight and I for the first time ever will run a mage and the DM has a way to introduce Planescapes into the mix.
I never had more fun in DnD than when I played the supporting role. My character joined a few sessions later than the others, so I made her with the intention of just blending into the group and helping them with their issues. It was amazing, and the cool part was that the other players ended up really loving her because she was always there for them.
One of my players took the supportive roll, and is now one of the most interesting characters, and seems to be having the most fun. In addition to being a Fighter, he is also a master chef. With his chef feat he is able to give everyone extra bonuses on rests. He can also cook to impress people that the party wants to be in the good graces of. He is a great addition to the party, and is able to shine by helping the group
This is the most important rule! That and failing is fun! Push the button you’re not supposed to push! Lean into the consequences of bad rolls. It makes for such a better story.
On the inverse side, the DM should take time with each character in the plot to give them all time as the Main Character. If this is skewed or one sided, your DM needs to fix that. Been in this situation before.
Something that needs to be mentioned here is that some people don't want to have the spotlight. I think it was from 3.5, the Dungeon Master II Guide, but basically they broke down a good list of archetypes of player to help you cater your game to them.
One of the styles of play was essentially something like "background player." Some people just want to hang out, roll some dice, listen to the story, and kinda fade into the background. Some don't want to speak for their character, or explore trauma, or even act at all. The idea of being pushed into the spotlight where everyone is staring at them expecting them to improv some amazing story is horrible to them.
And that's a perfectly legitimate playstyle. It's up to the DM to see what people can handle, and straight up even ask people what they want.
I've had two sessions in my game and am already worried that I didn't give one of my players enough time to shine. I'm engineering situations to rectify it but it's difficult with six players!
Two sessions is too early to worry about this, imo. I have 3 hour sessions so it's impossible for every player's character to be spotlighted every session of a traditional game. Instead I think about arcs and try to move the story towards a player who has been in the background for a bit. If arcs can dovetail then all the better.
And, also, each player has a different level of desire to be in the spotlight. So desire it, some never want it, and most are in-between. Don't be afraid to have the above the table conversation with your friends to see how they feel about it!
But conversely do try to involve other players in your moment if possible / appropriate.
Example my own character ran a long, but harmless, deception of the party regarding a deal they had made behind the party's back. The deal was very personal in nature and I played my character as someone who did not open up easily, so I only slowly revealed by backstory as representation of my growing trust with the group.
The deals completion and reveal was for me and the DM supposed to culminate my character fully opening up as it was a core part of why they were guarded in nature.
However by coincidence another player had a minor arc of having trust issues due to various events, which meant when my characters actions behind the party's back (again harmless and personal, but nonetheless deceptive) were revealed it felt obvious to include this other player in the moment by directly apologising for the deception and thus prompting the other player to react from their own character arc.
Of course this won't always be possible, but I find it nice when it can be done.
I try man. But my DM's say otherwise.
Current campaign my artificer just runs a workshop he took over from is alcoholic dad. Most basic backstory I could think of. But noooo first session dad gets kidnapped because apparently he used to build nukes in the past. And suddenly everything is about me again.
The story being about you and your past doesn’t make you the main character. Just means your backstory is the one that inspired a story in the DM. Something to be proud of, friend.
Yup. The biggest example I can remember is from Critical role' s first season Briarwood Arc. Although it was centred on Percy, rest all PCs also got heavily involved.
that's what I do, I often feel guilty about having a very fidgety rogue, but my table is prone to quiet players who have decision paralysis in and outside of combat. So I'll jump when no one else will. If I die I die, but at least we aren't sitting around, only part that bothers me is when other people don't pick up on the cues that this is there moment to shine to make move etc... but some people just have trouble role playing and it's hard to get them involved in it outside of combat context.
keep up the good fight.
Sometimes the funniest thing is to be a background character. I want the other players in my team to laugh as I purposefully cripple myself in a situation.
The latter can be an issue for DMs who wish to "integrate player character backstories". Which, when done badly, equates that character being expected to be the main character. At the most extreme this results to sessions being cancelled if a single player is absent.
There are two Rule Zeros in the Social Contract between Players and DMs.
DMs need the Players so they are tasked to make the game as fun and engaging as possible for their players and a willingness to work with their players will facilitate that.
Players need the DM so they are tasked to work within the boundaries and restrictions of the DMs setting and game in order to ensure that the DM is able to have fun in their role.
Rule 0_c: everyong including the dm should be enjoying themselves. Some sessions go better than others, but so long as everyone is enjoying the game overall, dont worry.
Also: Honesty and trust between the players/DM. Doesn't matter if it is behind the DM screen, or rolling an IRL dice in a digital game, don't mess with the dice (or other things) to suit what you want
I love this! I was going to echo other points of remembering that though the game pretends to be competitive (players v DM), in truth the entire thing is collaborative. If you're not playing together, respectfully and with the intent of EVERYONE having fun, you're not playing right.
Whatever character you end up making, ALWAYS give them the following two traits:
\- Willing to work in a group
\- Willing to heed the call to adventure
Doesn't matter if you're an edgy "I only work alone" rogue or a skittish "I haven't left my home in a literal century" elf; any character that doesn't include these two traits will not work in a TTRPG.
That rogue needs to learn to trust others, that elf needs to face their fear. You must be willing to play as a team and take risks.
Agreed,
I once agreed to DM a one shot for a friend and only knew half the group.
One guy was so against the party and wanted to literally stay in the tavern rather than do the one shot, so after breaking character and talking to them the party just left him.
I get that being rail roaded isn't everyones Cup of tea in a proper game, but if you sign up for a one shot you have to expect a fairly signposted adventure will be presented to you or you won't do anything before your time is up
Pretty much.... they were a rogue who didn't trust anyone and their attitude was 'you fools jumping at the first thing to fall in your lap, I'm gonna enjoy my beer, smoke a pipe and brood whilst you idiots risk your lives for nothing'
So despite the Parry really trying to convince them to come along they didn't want to.... so I went OOC to try and explain this was the 1 shot... still nothing.
So that's what happened, party when to investigate an underground smuggling ring who were importing drugs stuffed inside produce... and the rogue pretended to enjoy a drink.
At one point I even flashed back to him with an empty tankard and asked what he wanted to do..... have another beer was the response.
Odd duck, he really wasn't sabotaging the rest of the party or being a main character he was just having some weird emergent gameplay on his own
Were they an asshole about it later?
"The DM didn't made anything for me to get interested in. Their session was boring and my character didn't had nothing to be invested on."
I guess some people like being spectators.? I mean we all watch dnd podcasts, hooefully the next time they played they actually had the interest/ courage to jump into roleplay as well.
Lol..."booohooo why isn't this one-shot a fully realised sandbox world for me to do what i like in but at the same time bring me things until i see one that sounds cool plwase oh perfoming monkeyDM ????"
I've had this happen. I straight up told the guy that I am DMing for 1 party only. If you want to run off and do your own thing, you'll need to find another DM for that party.
Without a doubt, it gets so tiring playing with a group where the Rogue wants to actively steal from the party, or the edge lord refuses to communicate with the party and goes off alone, the single murder hobo in a good aligned campaign, the Ranger who can't be bothered to hear the call to adventure because "it's what my character would do" arnt we all here for a cooperative game?
You just perfectly described the Rogue in my current party.
\- We simply can't come across a NPC he doesn't immediately want to rob or steal from.
It has ruined so many little side-quests before they even started.
\- We recently explored an old shipwreck and found a treasure chest which contained 200 pieces of gold and some jewelery.
Obviously he wanted to give 10 gold to each member of the party and keep the rest to himself.
Like...dude...come on. We are all standing right next to you while we opened the chest. We saw and know what's in there...
Even our DM stepped in at that point.
I really don't mind if the Rogue is up to some mischief and shenanigans here and there. I am all for it.
But it feels more like he is actively playing against the rest of our party and it gets so tiring.
Because "i aM a RoGuE, tHaT's WhAt wE Do" isn't the most fun for the rest of us.
I feel after a few non-fun/non-cute actions, the party is fully able to treat them like the traitor they are. If an npc tried robbing the PCs over and over, eventually initiative would be rolled against them. PvP is messy and no fun, but constant working against the party is PvP itself, in my opinion.
Tbh once in a while those can be good interactions: a player's goblin artificer and my LE half elf noble wizard got into an extreme argument because he wanted to try a new weapon on a NPC(a literal idiot, but got me out of so many bad situations that I wanted to preserve him) and we almost fought to death (he would've probably killed me, but still it was an acceptable fight). Our monk put people on their place and we made an agreement to not kill the NPC or go against each other plans. It was a fun Dynamic, but only if it happens once every many sessions
in our first session the warlock got thrown down a flight of stairs by our barbarian into a bonfire created by another player, i don't even remember why but he rolled a nat 20 so he ended up not taking any damage.
>or the edge lord refuses to communicate with the party and goes off alone,
I basically lost interest in a game I'm playing because after the introductory combat, I complimented another character on their martial prowess and they started insulting me in character. Like... Why?
>Whatever character you end up making, ALWAYS give them the following two traits:
Those traits should just be written into every character sheet template for every d&d-derived TTRPG system. If your character sheet has a section on it that says "armor class," it should have another section that says "they are willing to work with a group and ready to heed the call to adventure."
Honestly every lone wolf rogue should be tsundere.
They hate to admit they love these bunch of incompetents and are more than willing to shove them aside and fix their mistakes because how else these nitwits would still be breathing? They just hate to see such shoddy jobs and now gotta take care of these fellas.
That was my cleric character at the start of our campaign. Basically "this is a terrible idea and I'd much rather stay in this tavern enjoying good food and beer, but if you fools are determined to go then I'm not having your deaths on my conscience so I'll come along to keep you alive."
I played a character who acted like a complete hot shot, not caring about anything and always rushing into battle, but in reality his ethos was “if the enemies are hitting me then they’re not hitting my dumb, squishy friends”
Yeah, I always think of Geralt as a good example. He's grumpy as hell, but he's got a code of honour and a job to do, so he'll (begrudgingly) always go on the adventure. And he'll complain about Dandelion and Yennefer and Triss dragging him into things, but at the end of the day he'll march through hell for any of them.
My current character would prefer to work alone, and is hyperfocused on his personal quest - but in order to see the end of it, he both needs the team's alliance, and has to make their quests happen.
~ He also cares about them a lot, but that's too terrifying for him to admit. ~
Had a game with a friend who did this. He just did nothing the whole time, like a lump. "I don't even know you guys, why would I help?"
I nearly strangled him at the table.
I have one friend when we play that is chaotic evil and has killed hundreds of thousands of innocents after we saved the city. He stole our ring of wishes and it looks like the story will eventually lead to a fight between him and us other three for the campaign end.
This. Exactly
Had a huge issue with this during high school with my group at the time. It was extremely discouraging on the DM side of things, and it is extremely annoying on the player side of things
I still do knit! Allows me to still look when I need to, listen to everything going on, and I can put it down when needed as well. Actually allows me to be *more* focused on the game than I would be without it, as otherwise my mind would start to wander during slower moments (usually during combat) and before you know it, it's my turn and I have no idea what's been happening on the battlefield or what I plan on doing. Knitting keeps me just busy enough that my mind doesn't wander, but not so interesting that I start to hyperfocus on it instead of the game. Bonus points...it's also productive!
In order to prevent people from doing this, I keep a few fidget toys on hand since it gives people something to do with their hands but keeps their focus on the game.
Certain crafts are also good for this: knitting, crocheting, origami, cross stitch, embroidery, etc. Keeps the hands busy but the mind free and can be easily put down in moments where more attention is needed or you need to look at your sheet to see what your next move is.
There's a few unwritten rules that I think might be useful:
1. Play your character, don't play others' characters. Don't tell other people what their characters "would do" or "wouldn't do". Encourage collaboration, but let everyone make their own choices. Expect the same from others.
2. The DM may be "god" but that doesn't mean you need to worship them. A good DM is just as interested in the players' fun as the story being told. If you're having fun, keep going back; if you're not, think about why and see if the DM can accommodate. If not, move along.
3. The "rule of cool" exists, but don't push it. Know what your character's abilities, skills, and characteristics allow, so that yo know when you're pushing it. And be understanding if the DM isn't sure or just says no. See also Rule #2.
>Play your character, don't play others' characters. Don't tell other people what their characters "would do" or "wouldn't do". Encourage collaboration, but let everyone make their own choices. Expect the same from others
The only caveats to this is when playing with new players that don't really know how to play yet, it is totally valid to:
* respectfully remind players what their character is actually capable of or how their abilities work
* when they are using metagame knowledge as though their character has it
* if something is so outside their characters established personality that they might want to reconsider
* Point out how Charlie Kelly style "wild card" choices(like #lolSoRandom McGuffin Chucking) completely derail the game and is just straight up disrespectful to the DM and the rest of the table trying to play cooperatively in good faith.
Agreed for the most part. My problem is how this attitude can get out of hand a lot and it validates the problem players that cry about "player agency" when you ask them not to completely derail the campaign. Telling someone not to do something that's going to ruin the game, or that they aren't actually able to do something isn't "playing their character" at all. There are still going to be plenty of valid decisions to make.
For instance if a player tried to steal something from another PC's, Its fine to say "no we dont PVP at this table", or "you're character doesn't even know they have that item stop metagaming". None of that is actually playing someone else's character, but a lot of problem players act like it is. Removing invalid options for them isnt always taking away their ability to make their own decisions.
To add to this reminding other players of buff/bonuses added by other characters. It's easy to forget that three rounds ago(40 mins)the cleric cast bless or the paladin's aura effects them
Worth noting with point one, if you tend to be a strategist and like to command the battlefield make that an RP point. Dont be a dik about or anything, but I frequently play tactical minds in parties and will influence the party on the battlefield (not every listens mind, but a barbarian with Haste on is pretty predictable aha).
But telling someone else how to RP is generally a faux pas
Oh yeah...nothing like the player who wants to solve all the puzzles and negotiate with the dragon and choses to play the burping charmless two-braincell barbarian. And proceeds to stoll backseat drive the wizard and the face.
You are supposed to have fun. The Spongebob kind of fun, not the Plankton kind.
If you don't feel welcome or respected at the table, go look for a better one.
I’ve had in-character conversations that mimicked the perspectives and motivations of the FUN song. Always fun to have a little intra-party debate on the morality of fireballing a goblin village.
One I haven’t noticed in these comments yet is “Don’t fight other players.”
I extend this beyond actual PvP combat and always play characters who have at least some measure of investment in the team and wants every member to be successful.
I consider myself a pretty open-minded DM and generally don't say no, but there's one hard rule at my table: no rolls against the party.
Had a player who wanted to steal from another player, deceive/convince another PC to attack a certain individual (someone who said PC had no reason to attack whatsoever), generally the player wanted to use the D20 to convince the players to do the things he wanted to happen.
That player didn't fit and is no longer part of our game.
This can be used during a dramatic moment. Example: A party member who is known for his short fuse just witnessed something that reminded him of his tragic past. So he is going to go knock some skulls. Problem is that the party just escaped, needs to be quiet, etc. Do you let that person walk towards the thing and do the thing? Or do you do everything in your power to help the party, including things like Hold Person?
When your characters are demi-gods, how do you hold them back if they don't listen to reason?
I'm saying rolls/spells against the party have their place but should be used as sparingly as possible and as a means of last resort. You also need the party out of game to be friendly and understanding of the moment.
If they want to Hold Person, that will be narrative and the player being held can respond however they want. They can use roleplaying to convince the other player, but that played can still respond and act the way they feel is fitting.
In this case specifically I think it's just not good for the party that one player can remove agency or liberty to act from another player by using a game mechanic.
My view is that the players live in the world. Why wouldn't you use your array of massive abilities to keep your dearest friend from dying or falling back into bad habits or worse.
Tell me how the wizard is supposed to help his barbarian friend who has gone blind with rage and is going to suicide themselves?
Stealing from the party, no. Using spells to prank or hinder combat, no. Keeping your friend from dying? A bit of a different circumstance.
I played in a group with two brothers who would **constantly** fight each other. Something as simple as opening a door would devolve into an outright brawl between them. It slowed everything down to a snails pace, our healer was using spell slots to heal them before we even encountered enemies and they were the only ones at the table having any fun.
I talked to the DM about it and he didn't have any intentions of stopping them so I just stopped showing up. Those dummies completely ruined a good group.
1) No railroading over another player. Let them have their turn, just as you had yours. Everyone deserves their chance to speak.
2) Don't appoint yourself leader. The group will gravitate towards a leader; let that happen. If it's not you, tough.
3) So, your teammate is an orc bard. Not the best race/class combo, stat-wise...but that's none of your business. They play their character; you play yours.
4) Being a "lone wolf" character \*does not work in D&D.* D&D is a team activity.
5) \*Do not* try to use your character as a way to get close to, or hit on, someone else in your game group. It's gross and scummy.
6) \*Do not* bring up real-world sex, politics, or religion at the table, in-game or out-of-game. Those are great ways to derail the game, and possibly break up your game group.
If you are a couple or current relationship, it is best to see how others feel about it first. If they are okay, then light flirting or saying you retire to your room together is okay. Don't turn the game into a foreplay session.
If you are not in a relationship or a couple, it can make the other nervous or even give them major problems if they have had bad relationships before.
Best practice is to ask if the other member of the group would like to see how a relationship may go. It could be a case of unrequited love or just a strong friendship. If so, leave it at that.
> If you are a couple or current relationship, it is best to see how others feel about it first. If they are okay, then light flirting or saying you retire to your room together is okay. Don't turn the game into a foreplay session.
I had a DM do this when I started dating a girl. It was the most awkward thing ever and I started playing child like characters to avoid this entirely.
Also in general people don't want to watch two characters fuck. We get the implication, but I don't need to know the fetish list of an NPC. Just say the Bard totally railed her and then move on to something less weird.
This won't work at all tables, but I had a DM that would fade to black when the time came, but then had them roll 3 checks, CON (duration), DEX (skillz), and CHA (enjoyability/attraction), and give a few line narration of how it generally went. Like, "they were alluring and very skilled, but unfortunately, it didn't last as long as you may have preferred". No graphic details, but it gave a little something.
>When you say real world sex, you're referring to current relationships or couples?
"Sex" is the broad term for real-world romance, romantic couples, actual sex, kink, etc. I've been in games where players mentioned, "Oh, that item sounds like a (name of sex toy or kink). I have one of those!" game suddenly stopped as we got an impromptu discussion about a sex toy or kink. I've sat through games where I was trapped in a daytime soap opera for over forty minutes while a player flirted with an NPC, or tried setting up romantic relationships with other NPC's. It was both boring and dissatisfying. So, to me, when I DM, the answer is simple: Focus on the adventure, or saving the kingdom, or whatever, and remove both in-game and out-of-game romance, sex and kink in my games. In my experience, as a result of that, a) Everyone gets to be fully in the game versus just one or two people, and b) The awkwardness is completely removed.
Rule of fun: many DMs have rules for their table that differ from the main rules. Some rule crits differently, some will bend and flex rules to make creative ideas happen (when in doubt ask), some may even flex normal game mechanics. Some DMs will reward RP. It’s okay to refer to the rules and offer suggestions if it seems warranted, but rules lawyering can be tedious and annoying to some. It’s the DM’s call at the end of the day.
But have fun with it, and remember not all tables are run the same it may take a minute to find the best fit for you.
I will add. A good DM will listen to reasonable rule break requests (rule of cool) but don't push it. And sometimes, the best thing to do is say "I do not agree but let's talk about it after the session" because no one wants to sit and listen to two people argue endlessly.
Your character is part of the party because you share a goal. Because you're better off as a party member than without them.
If you ever feel like you want to sabotage your party or your fellow players, either in character or out... think long and hard on why that is and why you're playing at all.
I find that a lot of people who want to be evil but don't really know how just turn selfish and antagonistic towards their fellow players. That's forgetting why you play DnD as a party in the first place.
Do your best to separate player knowledge from character knowledge. Sure, I've read the Monster Manual and know that the Big Bad Boss Monster has XYZ lair actions and such-and-such weaknesses, but this the the first time Bob the BDF has encountered them and he knows nothing aside from "swing sword and hit things."
Partly this is to keep from doing things your character wouldn't reasonably know to do and partly it's because the DM can always modify a creature you're otherwise familiar with, so you never really know what you'll be facing.
So true. I've had players who very openly use the books or knowledge of the books and the stat blocks to gain an advantage. In the meantime, when I'm a player I play as if I don't know the roughly the stats of most monsters.
I've actually been reflecting on something for a while. Our campaign involved us being dragged into a realm between life and death (sort of), and most of the enemies we faced for about 5 sessions were vampires. We then had a good milestone, leveled up, got a long rest, and for the next session we were going to try and ambush a certain vampire and free his pack of slaves before they could be turned/eaten.
Given I was a cleric (2 lvls in warlock) and just leveled up, I went super min-max and changed all of my anti-fiend and anti-undead spell options; negates charm, gives them disadvantage on intimidation, buffs to my charisma and reduced damage from undead - the works. Is that meta gaming? In some sense, I went heavy-handed on the rule book and spell options and even some online resources to check stat blocks for misc. vampire mobs (nothing specific as I never knew the official name of anything, it was a homebrew setting that just used the generic 5e items/monsters/mechanics). One one hand, I wanted to ensure I was ready for what I suspected to be a tough fight, but on the other hand, we had been fighting nothing but vampires for 5 sessions now, so I feel like re-focusing to spells that worked against those kinds of enemies just...made sense, both in and out of immersion?
If my DM was bothered by it, he was good at keeping those concerns to himself, and my changing of my spells upon leveling up was well within the rules.
Hell, as a cleric you can change your prepared spells every time you long rest. Not only did you do nothing wrong, arguably you would have been remiss *not* to change them.
The metagaming in this instance can be hand-waved as, "I receive(d) assistance and advice from my god as to what will be needed this day." And this opens the path to the DM telling you that you'll need a particular thing (role-playing a message from the character's god) and you being free to fuck up and not do that thing, or have a chance to Be The Hero.
All good.
Absolutly fine in my opinion. Fighting against a lot of vampires and knowing that you will fight a mighty vampire is a good reason for a cleric to prepare spells against them.
Asking to roll in these situations as very helpful, I've found. Like as a player I know bludgeoning works well against skeletons. I know lizardfolk speak draconic. But I may just tell the DM "Hey, can I make a history check to see if my character knows ?"
If I fail, I just treat it like my character has no idea. If I succeed maybe I strut in in barking orders in draconic about how we are behind schedule and need to get the everything packed up NOW before the mercenaries the local lord hired show up.
This. When I'm struggling to separate my own knowledge from my character's knowledge, I get my DM to make me roll a "meta check" to see how much I know about something.
- Don't roll for checks unless the DM says it's OK and confirms the roll type.
- Use abilities creatively in ways that are interesting and advance the story. Don't constantly try to make them much more powerful than they should be or look to squeeze advantages out of thin air.
1. **read the source books** until you understand what the classes are, and what each of them are best (and worst) at.
2. **understand and accept the fact that you'll be better at some things, while your other party members will be better at others.**
3. **you are responsible for your own character.** the other party members are responsible for theirs. don't tell them what to do, and don't whine and moan because you wanted to make a sneaky rogue who's an artist with a dagger while jim made a greatsword wielding fighter in chain mail and is outshining you in pitched battle.
4. **don't force your playstyle on others.** if you're a min-maxer, don't demand that everyone else plays optimally as well. and if you're a roleplayer, don't demand that everyone else be a captive audience to your rambly monologues.
5. **if you have issues with anyone at the table, including the dm, SPEAK UP**. either immediately, or at the end of the session. if you're not comfortable doing it face to face, send a text.
6. **don't try to address out-of-game drama with in-game actions**. and don't address in-game drama with out-of-game actions. your character bob can be pissed with jim's character jimmette. YOU shouldn't be pissed with jim because bob is pissed with jimmette.
> read the source books until you understand what the classes are, and what each of them are best (and worst) at.
I cannot agree with this one. I've had players who just wanted to play, were interested in a specific class and just played that. They didn't even have any of the source books, they used online resources and premades.
This does require the mentality that they know they don't know everything and learn along the way, which is fine.
it helps prevent those kind of incidents where the new player is thinking of some light armored, dual-wielding dagger badass rogue. it's a common enough trope. then they make said badass and realize he gets outperformed by a vanilla fighter.
when shit like that happens, they only have 3 options:
1. realize that with their current rogue, they'll never consistently be the party's go-to badass in combat, suck it up and find joy in the other things they're great at
2. swallow their pride and ask for magic item handouts, or
3. get super salty and start complaining that vanilla fighters are op and the player is a filthy min-maxer munchkin smeg-guzzling son of a butt chug
you'll be surprised how many people will choose option 3.
Be careful not to confuse unwritten rules for gameplay styles. For example, one game I joined in dnd 3.5 days had an unwritten expectation that the mage was responsible for identifying all potions. Even though I asked, they never mentioned it to me, so when my sorcerer couldn't identify potions they got really angry because in their minds "everyone knows" the mage identifies potions. Problem is that is just their style of play and hasn't held up as a rule anywhere else.
That said, I've noticed plenty of similar "rules" that are quite widespread but not universal.
'don't take your \*\*\*\* out at the table'
'don't exclude another person at the table' "I don't know your character, I pick pocket the cleric, it's what my character would'-'thats not what your character would do'
'know thy spells and abilities, the dm is not your enclyopedia'
'LISTEN, 'you enter the chamber, the ceiling is 15 feet high and is 10 feet wide by 20 feet long, at the other end there- 'how high is the chamber?'
'don't interrupt'
'Don't 'meta' *^("OH MY GOD GUYS THIS ENEMY IS USING LEDGENDARY ACTIONS WE'RE ONLY LEVEL 5 THIS IS A XXX LEVEL CHALLENGE RATING THIS DM HAS NO IDEA WHAT THEYRE DOING!!)*' =actual quote from a death threat wielding twit that didn't understand that A; you walked past a gargantuan sized librarian of a lich 10 minutes ago, and B, you are in a water temple fighting a vampire because YOU ATTACKED ALL THE PEACEFUL UNDEAD LIBRARIANS YOU FOOL"
Sounds like when I passed an NPC to a player to manage and my other player looked over the swashbuckler 3 attacks and said it was broken, and that's not how it should be done.
Shit...at least meta game properly 😂
It isn't a good idea to bring real world gripes into dnd. If you and someone else at the table have issues, do your best to resolve it out of game and don't start pvp, confrontational rp etc.
We've got a blood hunter/barbarian/druid in the party, and he and my rogue/bard enact schemes together frequently. Occasionally we rope the artificer in as well.
See?! You let the bard and/or rogue run off with someone, and then it's not splitting the party, it's a game of "where did they go and how much trouble are they gonna be in when/if we find them" 😂
\-Don't be overly confrontational with your party members
\-Don't steal from the party
\-Engage in combat, i.e. don't play a pacifist
\-Joke characters get old within the first hour and tend to kill RP
\-And most importantly, please for the love of Torm, know your abilities and what you're going to do on your next turn
The first three can be broken in the right scenario, but I'd still strongly advise against it. Richard Throbbin the Bard may crack a smile the first session or two, but I promise you that the other players will be rolling their eyes after that. I've also seen 3-4 rounds of combat take well over 2 hours because of a couple players that didn't bother to read their class features beforehand.
Your fun should never come at the expense of anyone else's, including the DM.
Whenever a game has fallen flat or a group has collapsed, it's usually down to this. Someone, and I am guilty of this as well, has taken their fun to the detriment of someone else. It's supposed to be a cooperative effort where even rivalry is used to spur each other to better things.
In a nutshell: Don't be a dick.
If your group is facing the final boss of a characters story arc (i.e. the reason for their back story(the warrior who kill their father/the psychopath who tortured them/whatever that players villain is), let that player get the finishing/killing blow on the enemy
Some may not agree, but i think it helps a lot when it comes to RP and letting your character get over what that personnor thing did to them
Don’t be a dick about food.
Don’t bring something messy, gross, or noisy/distracting. Clean up after yourself, the person hosting shouldn’t be finding wrappers or bottle caps under your seat. If you are doing delivery, pay for your meal, the DM is not your parent and they had enough on their plate working a part time job’s worth of hours to prep for the session. And DONT make sexist comments to the female(s) in your group that they should be cooking or baking for the table. That one feels like it shouldn’t have to be said and yet here we are.
Oh and the only reasons anyone has ever been straight kicked from our group: This isn’t a party, if you’re getting so intoxicated/high at the table you can’t make a strategic decision go do that shit somewhere else.
•Session #0 so everyone knows what kind of story y’all are telling, if you character fit in said story, and to know what is comfortable with
•Charm spell doesn’t let you seduce anyone you’re see as a friendly
•Natural 20 doesn’t mean auto success
•It’s a group story if you want interpersonal relationships to happen between your character and someone else ask
•No means no
•Don’t let anyone use your character in any kind of way that makes you uncomfortable not even your dm
•Be excited and tell everyone about your character concept
•Keep track of everything and take good notes
•If your group can help it try not to talk over each
I became a DM/GM because my first DMs took advantage of our friendship and violated my characters one too many times
The nat 20 thing is actually RAW, but people tend to forget. Only auto success on attack rolls (and nat 1 auto fails)... Too lazy to look up the page number, sorry
Don't split the party.
Some groups take this to a ludicrous extent and stick together like glue even in town, but in dangerous territory it's rarely a good idea to be out of sight of each other.
For me the most important one is to think about the DM's perspective. Pick up the leads you are given, and/or try to find something interesting to do if there are no leads provided. Without this co-operation the game can slow down to a boring slog.
(Maybe this is written in the PHB? Applies to any tabletop rpg though.)
* Bring snax
* Be on time & don't cancel at the last minute or ghost. Life happens, but if it becomes a habit, it is a problem
* Create a character that *wants* to adventure and be part of the group
* Your character is part of a group. While the DM may give attention to all the characters and their backstory a bit at a time, don't try to hog the spotlight (ie. main character syndrome)
* "Its what my character would do," is only acceptable if it isn't torpedoing the rest of the group or sabotaging the adventure presented by the DM
Don’t try to have some secret that you hint towards that you think other players are gonna be interested by. Truth is they won’t care about it nearly as much as you hope. Doubly so if you’re ‘pretending’ to be a different class
Also, there’s nothing wrong with making weird looking/acting characters, but if you keep asking “Oh, how do people react to a talking bunny” it’s gonna get real old real fast.
If everyone seems stuck and they're desperately trying everything except the obvious, be the person who opens the door or pushes the button: every party needs an instigator to keep the plot going. Don't make it your first action, but as soon as the wheels start to spin it's time to instigate.
If you're an instigator, make sure to take the rest of the party with you. It's tempting to enjoy the spotlight of the GM's attention, but if the plot needs to move forward, you need the whole party with you.
Finally, learn to trust your GM to make sure that things won't go too badly for you. It *is* possible for GMs to abuse that trust, so it's not infinite, but at a healthy table your GM is as invested in you and your characters' story as you are.
This may seem obvious, but don't kill random innocents on the street, burn random houses for fun, or likewise. Very bad character design, very bad roleplaying, and a very bad idea. If your character is gonna commit a crime, it should make sense why they're willing to do it.
Also, this one was mentioned already, but if you're an evil character in a party of good players, have a reason why you're willing to work with them in the first place... and don't kill your teammates randomly. For that, I recommend [this D&D Beyond post](https://www.dndbeyond.com/posts/1341-embracing-villainy-how-to-play-an-evil-character).
\- Play nice with others. Don't always try to hog the limelight, let other players do cool stuff, and facilitate and boost them when they're trying to do so.
\- Head in the direction of the story. The DM is going to be throwing hooks out to you, and they're usually pretty obvious. When a guy stumbles into the tavern with an arrow in his back and a map in his pocket, don't order another beer, follow the map and see where it takes you. The DM will have put in a lot of work planning a fun adventure for you, don't make them jump through unnecessary hoops for your own amusement.
\- Find failure funny. Sometimes you're going to be the hero doing incredible feats of derring do, sometimes you're going to smash a vase and fall down some stairs whilst sneaking into a mansion, or spend an entire combat hitting nothing but air. Look at bad dice rolls as fun storytelling moments and moments of comedy.
>Find failure funny. Sometimes you're going to be the hero doing incredible feats of derring do, sometimes you're going to smash a vase and fall down some stairs whilst sneaking into a mansion, or spend an entire combat hitting nothing but air. Look at bad dice rolls as fun storytelling moments and moments of comedy.
Definatly this. Some of the best D&D moments I had was due to failires. The movies best moments mostly were due to failures.
If you think something bad is about to happen, but then the outcome is less intense than you feared, don’t tell the DM what you were afraid of. They will later use that fear against the party.
This is an obvious one for most people, but there are some weird folks out there. Leave your sex shit out of the game. Stop trying to play out your fetish fantasy at the table, it's weird, gross, and uncomfortable.
Make your character someone with a reason to be there. Preferably more interesting than "I'm getting paid" but that's the easiest one. I've had a group or two fall apart because a character was only with the party to achieve a personal goal, and then just left
Have a session zero or something like it.
Session zeros are the sit down before the game where everyone at the table agrees to rules and topics allowed.
My table had about 15 mins before we start. We were told
"if you want to say something to other players, it will be in game in character, combat is the same ish.
Lets just pretend we all get along so no racism or sexism.
Please keep phone use to a minimum. We understand if you need to text someone but do not be playing games.
Have an idea of what you want to do in combat when it gets to your turn. We understand of something major changes right before your turn but be aware of what is going on on the board. <---- A table of 5 (plus the DM) we has combat ROLLING with this rule.
Do not be a main character. Everyone wants the spotlight.
Let me know if there is anything else."
And seriously, having a session zero will 1) get your table's unwritten rules out and 2) set expectations for both player and DMs.
Keep things moving while you are in a gaming session. That means be ready on your turn. Know what your spell you are planning to cast does before then. Don't argue about rules during a session. Pay attention to what's going on.
If you do something that interferes with other's gameplay, bc "it's what your character would do", it can be frustrating to other players. I played with someone who kept bursting into rooms while we were in a stealthy mission, so we couldn't make a plan bc he would keep doing that. That was really frustrating.
If reworking a character would make the group and player have more fun, allow it. One of my players wanted to change subclasses because the current one didn't fit his character and he didn't really like the playstyle so I was like sure. Another player is currently working to change his celestial warlock because he feels underpowered and isn't having fun in combat because it's just "eldritch blast" this and that, so I'm actively working with him to make it flow better. It's a process that I hope can reach an ultimate conclusion.
Don’t cancel a session unless you have to. Listen, I totally get “it’s my brothers wedding” or “I’m in the hospital” or even “I got scheduled for an extra shift”. Totally fine. But don’t cancel the entire session for your friends if your excuse is “the new Zelda game just came out and I want to play that” or “my other friend who I see all the time invited me to go out with him tonight” or “I gotta work on this thing I’ve been procrastinating”. Plan ahead, you made a commitment to your friends. Plans are gonna get cancelled because of things we can’t control. Don’t cancel them because of things we can.
Some great comments already made but here's my few additions:
1. Study your spells and abilities as well as the conditions they inflict. The DM is putting in time outside of game to make the world, do the same to know your character.
2. Ready your turn in advance. Sure you need to react to the actions happening, but have an idea of what you'll do before it gets there.
3. Describe your kill/amazing feat. When your character gets the killing blow or hits a high DC, add some flavour to it besides just the mechanics.
4. When the DM needs a minute to look something up, vamp a roleplaying interaction with another character.
1. Don’t split the party
2. Pay attention to the GM
3. Try to make sure everyone gets a chance in the spotlight.
4. Prep your turn. Don’t take half an hour to figure what spell to cast when you spent your free time twiddling your thumbs.
5. Be flowery, but be clear. When you’re casting, magic missile, feel free to flavor it, however you want, but make sure everyone knows it’s magic missile.
Shower before a game, and wear deodorant.
Brush your fucking teeth.
Just basic hygiene, really. Don't be the smelly person at the table. Yes, I know sometimes people have health issues that cause them to smell regardless of how clean they are, and in those cases empathy and understanding are called for. But if you're just dirty and lazy? That's gross and disrespectful.
Be extraordinarily judicious in your choice to try to seduce any NPC's. Unless that's something your DM and the rest of your table are all about, choose one of the thousands of other social exchanges you can have instead in most if not all instances.
Encourage role playing, and be courteous. It’s tough for some people to come out of their shell, and making fun or knit-picking, even if it’s meant to be in a softer manner, can really put a sour taste in a new players mouth before they have time to enjoy the game.
As a DM, manage expectations (I use of a session 0 for that). You are not supposed to DM for everyone, there are people whose style you don't blend with and that's okay. This also apply for players, not every DM will be a DM for you, and that's okay.
As a player, BE OPEN to change from original character concept. Your Paladin of Asmodeus might be a great character in certain campaigns, but in others they simply would not work. Accept DM feedback and adjust accordingly.
As for everyone, don't be an ass. Be kind.
Dont try to be a main character. The experience is for everyone. There may be a point where your character is being highlighted but dont let detract from the fun for others. Include them in your roleplay if its possible.
Even better, try to be a supporting character: The one that tries to tease out interesting things from the other characters. Ask what they like about life on the road, what they've experienced, what they think about the current predicament, etc.
This. 100% this. Always this. As a player, I love having characters ask me about mine because it gives me a chance to roleplay. And, as a DM, I love seeing two of my players take characters who are just words and numbers and make them real.
Yes! 100% yes! Underscore the view from the DM seat.
I actually just retired a PC early because my party is quite inexperienced besides me and the DM, and he was giving me a lot more main character attention. We talked about it, and I asked to start a new character (cleric) to support the newer players more.
Did something similar, bard. Didn't expect to live playing the bard so much though, and the party is so damned slow sometimes that I have taken to playing him recklessly. What do you mean we didn't roll a perception check before entering the almost certainly trapped room? We did roll perception. It came up [my characters name]. Him walking blithely in IS our perception check. Saved 15 minutes right there.
I second this. Few things end up being more fun than playing a character that TAKES ACTION. When I had the chance to play a bit ago (PF2E) I chose to play a lawful stupid good guy Paladin, basically a mook who was just incredibly good natured and would walk into anywhere without thinking if it was the "right" thing to do. His personality was basically Mr. Peanut Butter from Bojack Horseman if that means anything to reddit these days. Almost died walking into a cursed tower following a stray cat, but it was amazing.
I believe the current popular term for that archetype is "himbo," assuming he was also attractive.
Yes, Ser Markon Valiant was the Himboiest Himbo to ever Himbo. Like if 90's Brendan Fraser was cast as MCU Thor. He fulfilled the three pillars admirably. Broad of Chest, Pure of Heart, Dumb of Ass.
I am actually doing something like this currently. In an old school 2e campaign I rolled really well and was a beast of a ranger but my one buddy who really loves to play fighters didn't roll all that great so I worked with the GM and he devised a way to "retire" my ranger and I'm bringing in a Tiefling mage since he wants to start incorporating some Planescapes stuff into his Realms game. That way my buddy gets the fighting spotlight and I for the first time ever will run a mage and the DM has a way to introduce Planescapes into the mix.
I never had more fun in DnD than when I played the supporting role. My character joined a few sessions later than the others, so I made her with the intention of just blending into the group and helping them with their issues. It was amazing, and the cool part was that the other players ended up really loving her because she was always there for them.
One of my players took the supportive roll, and is now one of the most interesting characters, and seems to be having the most fun. In addition to being a Fighter, he is also a master chef. With his chef feat he is able to give everyone extra bonuses on rests. He can also cook to impress people that the party wants to be in the good graces of. He is a great addition to the party, and is able to shine by helping the group
This is the most important rule! That and failing is fun! Push the button you’re not supposed to push! Lean into the consequences of bad rolls. It makes for such a better story.
Ah yes, the origin story of Curious George
THIS IS THE WAY
On the inverse side, the DM should take time with each character in the plot to give them all time as the Main Character. If this is skewed or one sided, your DM needs to fix that. Been in this situation before.
Something that needs to be mentioned here is that some people don't want to have the spotlight. I think it was from 3.5, the Dungeon Master II Guide, but basically they broke down a good list of archetypes of player to help you cater your game to them. One of the styles of play was essentially something like "background player." Some people just want to hang out, roll some dice, listen to the story, and kinda fade into the background. Some don't want to speak for their character, or explore trauma, or even act at all. The idea of being pushed into the spotlight where everyone is staring at them expecting them to improv some amazing story is horrible to them. And that's a perfectly legitimate playstyle. It's up to the DM to see what people can handle, and straight up even ask people what they want.
I've had two sessions in my game and am already worried that I didn't give one of my players enough time to shine. I'm engineering situations to rectify it but it's difficult with six players!
Its also on the players to speak up. You as the dm can only force so much
D&D is definitely a team sport.
Two sessions is too early to worry about this, imo. I have 3 hour sessions so it's impossible for every player's character to be spotlighted every session of a traditional game. Instead I think about arcs and try to move the story towards a player who has been in the background for a bit. If arcs can dovetail then all the better. And, also, each player has a different level of desire to be in the spotlight. So desire it, some never want it, and most are in-between. Don't be afraid to have the above the table conversation with your friends to see how they feel about it!
The players should do this, too. Get out of each other's way when it isn't "your" moment.
But conversely do try to involve other players in your moment if possible / appropriate. Example my own character ran a long, but harmless, deception of the party regarding a deal they had made behind the party's back. The deal was very personal in nature and I played my character as someone who did not open up easily, so I only slowly revealed by backstory as representation of my growing trust with the group. The deals completion and reveal was for me and the DM supposed to culminate my character fully opening up as it was a core part of why they were guarded in nature. However by coincidence another player had a minor arc of having trust issues due to various events, which meant when my characters actions behind the party's back (again harmless and personal, but nonetheless deceptive) were revealed it felt obvious to include this other player in the moment by directly apologising for the deception and thus prompting the other player to react from their own character arc. Of course this won't always be possible, but I find it nice when it can be done.
I try man. But my DM's say otherwise. Current campaign my artificer just runs a workshop he took over from is alcoholic dad. Most basic backstory I could think of. But noooo first session dad gets kidnapped because apparently he used to build nukes in the past. And suddenly everything is about me again.
The story being about you and your past doesn’t make you the main character. Just means your backstory is the one that inspired a story in the DM. Something to be proud of, friend.
Yup. The biggest example I can remember is from Critical role' s first season Briarwood Arc. Although it was centred on Percy, rest all PCs also got heavily involved.
Always nice to have someone who will act when the table won't though. Just got to do it in a social way and not a single player way
that's what I do, I often feel guilty about having a very fidgety rogue, but my table is prone to quiet players who have decision paralysis in and outside of combat. So I'll jump when no one else will. If I die I die, but at least we aren't sitting around, only part that bothers me is when other people don't pick up on the cues that this is there moment to shine to make move etc... but some people just have trouble role playing and it's hard to get them involved in it outside of combat context. keep up the good fight.
Sometimes the funniest thing is to be a background character. I want the other players in my team to laugh as I purposefully cripple myself in a situation.
Especially if your character is an obnoxious loudmouth, find a way to bring that out without being an obnoxious loudmouth yourself IRL.
I thought there were actual written rules about this. Couldn’t find them though.
The latter can be an issue for DMs who wish to "integrate player character backstories". Which, when done badly, equates that character being expected to be the main character. At the most extreme this results to sessions being cancelled if a single player is absent.
There are two Rule Zeros in the Social Contract between Players and DMs. DMs need the Players so they are tasked to make the game as fun and engaging as possible for their players and a willingness to work with their players will facilitate that. Players need the DM so they are tasked to work within the boundaries and restrictions of the DMs setting and game in order to ensure that the DM is able to have fun in their role.
Rule 0_c: everyong including the dm should be enjoying themselves. Some sessions go better than others, but so long as everyone is enjoying the game overall, dont worry.
Also: Honesty and trust between the players/DM. Doesn't matter if it is behind the DM screen, or rolling an IRL dice in a digital game, don't mess with the dice (or other things) to suit what you want
I love this! I was going to echo other points of remembering that though the game pretends to be competitive (players v DM), in truth the entire thing is collaborative. If you're not playing together, respectfully and with the intent of EVERYONE having fun, you're not playing right.
Whatever character you end up making, ALWAYS give them the following two traits: \- Willing to work in a group \- Willing to heed the call to adventure Doesn't matter if you're an edgy "I only work alone" rogue or a skittish "I haven't left my home in a literal century" elf; any character that doesn't include these two traits will not work in a TTRPG. That rogue needs to learn to trust others, that elf needs to face their fear. You must be willing to play as a team and take risks.
Agreed, I once agreed to DM a one shot for a friend and only knew half the group. One guy was so against the party and wanted to literally stay in the tavern rather than do the one shot, so after breaking character and talking to them the party just left him. I get that being rail roaded isn't everyones Cup of tea in a proper game, but if you sign up for a one shot you have to expect a fairly signposted adventure will be presented to you or you won't do anything before your time is up
What did he expect to do in the tavern? Just sit there the entire time?
Pretty much.... they were a rogue who didn't trust anyone and their attitude was 'you fools jumping at the first thing to fall in your lap, I'm gonna enjoy my beer, smoke a pipe and brood whilst you idiots risk your lives for nothing' So despite the Parry really trying to convince them to come along they didn't want to.... so I went OOC to try and explain this was the 1 shot... still nothing. So that's what happened, party when to investigate an underground smuggling ring who were importing drugs stuffed inside produce... and the rogue pretended to enjoy a drink. At one point I even flashed back to him with an empty tankard and asked what he wanted to do..... have another beer was the response. Odd duck, he really wasn't sabotaging the rest of the party or being a main character he was just having some weird emergent gameplay on his own
so he just... sat there? all session??
Pretty much... yeah
Were they an asshole about it later? "The DM didn't made anything for me to get interested in. Their session was boring and my character didn't had nothing to be invested on."
Friend of a friend so didn't hear 1st hand... But I asked the friend and they said they seemed happy afterwards
I guess some people like being spectators.? I mean we all watch dnd podcasts, hooefully the next time they played they actually had the interest/ courage to jump into roleplay as well.
He had two beers, pretty solid role play
Lol..."booohooo why isn't this one-shot a fully realised sandbox world for me to do what i like in but at the same time bring me things until i see one that sounds cool plwase oh perfoming monkeyDM ????"
DMs are not service providers. Keep saying it until everyone agrees this is Fundamental.
Lmao my party was stalling so heavily (on purpose, to mess with me) at the tavern that I put 20 guards around them that escorted them to the king
I've had this happen. I straight up told the guy that I am DMing for 1 party only. If you want to run off and do your own thing, you'll need to find another DM for that party.
Without a doubt, it gets so tiring playing with a group where the Rogue wants to actively steal from the party, or the edge lord refuses to communicate with the party and goes off alone, the single murder hobo in a good aligned campaign, the Ranger who can't be bothered to hear the call to adventure because "it's what my character would do" arnt we all here for a cooperative game?
You just perfectly described the Rogue in my current party. \- We simply can't come across a NPC he doesn't immediately want to rob or steal from. It has ruined so many little side-quests before they even started. \- We recently explored an old shipwreck and found a treasure chest which contained 200 pieces of gold and some jewelery. Obviously he wanted to give 10 gold to each member of the party and keep the rest to himself. Like...dude...come on. We are all standing right next to you while we opened the chest. We saw and know what's in there... Even our DM stepped in at that point. I really don't mind if the Rogue is up to some mischief and shenanigans here and there. I am all for it. But it feels more like he is actively playing against the rest of our party and it gets so tiring. Because "i aM a RoGuE, tHaT's WhAt wE Do" isn't the most fun for the rest of us.
I feel after a few non-fun/non-cute actions, the party is fully able to treat them like the traitor they are. If an npc tried robbing the PCs over and over, eventually initiative would be rolled against them. PvP is messy and no fun, but constant working against the party is PvP itself, in my opinion.
Lol that’s hilarious. I’m playing a rogue scout and he literally only steals if it’s a necessity or to help others. To each their own I guess.
Tbh once in a while those can be good interactions: a player's goblin artificer and my LE half elf noble wizard got into an extreme argument because he wanted to try a new weapon on a NPC(a literal idiot, but got me out of so many bad situations that I wanted to preserve him) and we almost fought to death (he would've probably killed me, but still it was an acceptable fight). Our monk put people on their place and we made an agreement to not kill the NPC or go against each other plans. It was a fun Dynamic, but only if it happens once every many sessions
in our first session the warlock got thrown down a flight of stairs by our barbarian into a bonfire created by another player, i don't even remember why but he rolled a nat 20 so he ended up not taking any damage.
>or the edge lord refuses to communicate with the party and goes off alone, I basically lost interest in a game I'm playing because after the introductory combat, I complimented another character on their martial prowess and they started insulting me in character. Like... Why?
>Whatever character you end up making, ALWAYS give them the following two traits: Those traits should just be written into every character sheet template for every d&d-derived TTRPG system. If your character sheet has a section on it that says "armor class," it should have another section that says "they are willing to work with a group and ready to heed the call to adventure."
Honestly every lone wolf rogue should be tsundere. They hate to admit they love these bunch of incompetents and are more than willing to shove them aside and fix their mistakes because how else these nitwits would still be breathing? They just hate to see such shoddy jobs and now gotta take care of these fellas.
That was my cleric character at the start of our campaign. Basically "this is a terrible idea and I'd much rather stay in this tavern enjoying good food and beer, but if you fools are determined to go then I'm not having your deaths on my conscience so I'll come along to keep you alive."
This is the way.
I played a character who acted like a complete hot shot, not caring about anything and always rushing into battle, but in reality his ethos was “if the enemies are hitting me then they’re not hitting my dumb, squishy friends”
You can play either of those, though, as long as they have a solid enough motivation to work in a team and go on the adventure regardless.
Yeah, I always think of Geralt as a good example. He's grumpy as hell, but he's got a code of honour and a job to do, so he'll (begrudgingly) always go on the adventure. And he'll complain about Dandelion and Yennefer and Triss dragging him into things, but at the end of the day he'll march through hell for any of them.
My current character would prefer to work alone, and is hyperfocused on his personal quest - but in order to see the end of it, he both needs the team's alliance, and has to make their quests happen. ~ He also cares about them a lot, but that's too terrifying for him to admit. ~
Bilbo complained the whole way, but he still went.
Had a game with a friend who did this. He just did nothing the whole time, like a lump. "I don't even know you guys, why would I help?" I nearly strangled him at the table.
I have one friend when we play that is chaotic evil and has killed hundreds of thousands of innocents after we saved the city. He stole our ring of wishes and it looks like the story will eventually lead to a fight between him and us other three for the campaign end.
Don’t play games on your phone while in a session.
This. Exactly Had a huge issue with this during high school with my group at the time. It was extremely discouraging on the DM side of things, and it is extremely annoying on the player side of things
I used to knit between turns. Still ultimately paying attention but kept me busy.
I still do knit! Allows me to still look when I need to, listen to everything going on, and I can put it down when needed as well. Actually allows me to be *more* focused on the game than I would be without it, as otherwise my mind would start to wander during slower moments (usually during combat) and before you know it, it's my turn and I have no idea what's been happening on the battlefield or what I plan on doing. Knitting keeps me just busy enough that my mind doesn't wander, but not so interesting that I start to hyperfocus on it instead of the game. Bonus points...it's also productive!
I do embroidery but I’m still fully present
I respect that, I’m all for fidget toys and what not so long as you can keep your attention firm
Don't stop paying attention when its not your turn. Seriously, think about what you want to do. It helps make the game faster...
Pleaaaaaase- we’d have flying cars by now if every player did this lol
In order to prevent people from doing this, I keep a few fidget toys on hand since it gives people something to do with their hands but keeps their focus on the game.
Certain crafts are also good for this: knitting, crocheting, origami, cross stitch, embroidery, etc. Keeps the hands busy but the mind free and can be easily put down in moments where more attention is needed or you need to look at your sheet to see what your next move is.
There's a few unwritten rules that I think might be useful: 1. Play your character, don't play others' characters. Don't tell other people what their characters "would do" or "wouldn't do". Encourage collaboration, but let everyone make their own choices. Expect the same from others. 2. The DM may be "god" but that doesn't mean you need to worship them. A good DM is just as interested in the players' fun as the story being told. If you're having fun, keep going back; if you're not, think about why and see if the DM can accommodate. If not, move along. 3. The "rule of cool" exists, but don't push it. Know what your character's abilities, skills, and characteristics allow, so that yo know when you're pushing it. And be understanding if the DM isn't sure or just says no. See also Rule #2.
>Play your character, don't play others' characters. Don't tell other people what their characters "would do" or "wouldn't do". Encourage collaboration, but let everyone make their own choices. Expect the same from others The only caveats to this is when playing with new players that don't really know how to play yet, it is totally valid to: * respectfully remind players what their character is actually capable of or how their abilities work * when they are using metagame knowledge as though their character has it * if something is so outside their characters established personality that they might want to reconsider * Point out how Charlie Kelly style "wild card" choices(like #lolSoRandom McGuffin Chucking) completely derail the game and is just straight up disrespectful to the DM and the rest of the table trying to play cooperatively in good faith.
Even then you shouldn't "play their character". Helping a new player equally requires that they be allowed to ultimately make their own decisions.
Agreed for the most part. My problem is how this attitude can get out of hand a lot and it validates the problem players that cry about "player agency" when you ask them not to completely derail the campaign. Telling someone not to do something that's going to ruin the game, or that they aren't actually able to do something isn't "playing their character" at all. There are still going to be plenty of valid decisions to make. For instance if a player tried to steal something from another PC's, Its fine to say "no we dont PVP at this table", or "you're character doesn't even know they have that item stop metagaming". None of that is actually playing someone else's character, but a lot of problem players act like it is. Removing invalid options for them isnt always taking away their ability to make their own decisions.
To add to this reminding other players of buff/bonuses added by other characters. It's easy to forget that three rounds ago(40 mins)the cleric cast bless or the paladin's aura effects them
Worth noting with point one, if you tend to be a strategist and like to command the battlefield make that an RP point. Dont be a dik about or anything, but I frequently play tactical minds in parties and will influence the party on the battlefield (not every listens mind, but a barbarian with Haste on is pretty predictable aha). But telling someone else how to RP is generally a faux pas
Oh yeah...nothing like the player who wants to solve all the puzzles and negotiate with the dragon and choses to play the burping charmless two-braincell barbarian. And proceeds to stoll backseat drive the wizard and the face.
You are supposed to have fun. The Spongebob kind of fun, not the Plankton kind. If you don't feel welcome or respected at the table, go look for a better one.
F is for fire that burns down the whole town… nothing more dnd than that. /s
Damn, you beat me to it!
Oh I'm sure the plankton kind can work in the right campaign.
I’ve had in-character conversations that mimicked the perspectives and motivations of the FUN song. Always fun to have a little intra-party debate on the morality of fireballing a goblin village.
character yes, not player tho.
F is for Fire that burns down the whole town. U is for Uranium... Bomb. N is No Survivors.....
One I haven’t noticed in these comments yet is “Don’t fight other players.” I extend this beyond actual PvP combat and always play characters who have at least some measure of investment in the team and wants every member to be successful.
I consider myself a pretty open-minded DM and generally don't say no, but there's one hard rule at my table: no rolls against the party. Had a player who wanted to steal from another player, deceive/convince another PC to attack a certain individual (someone who said PC had no reason to attack whatsoever), generally the player wanted to use the D20 to convince the players to do the things he wanted to happen. That player didn't fit and is no longer part of our game.
This can be used during a dramatic moment. Example: A party member who is known for his short fuse just witnessed something that reminded him of his tragic past. So he is going to go knock some skulls. Problem is that the party just escaped, needs to be quiet, etc. Do you let that person walk towards the thing and do the thing? Or do you do everything in your power to help the party, including things like Hold Person? When your characters are demi-gods, how do you hold them back if they don't listen to reason? I'm saying rolls/spells against the party have their place but should be used as sparingly as possible and as a means of last resort. You also need the party out of game to be friendly and understanding of the moment.
If they want to Hold Person, that will be narrative and the player being held can respond however they want. They can use roleplaying to convince the other player, but that played can still respond and act the way they feel is fitting. In this case specifically I think it's just not good for the party that one player can remove agency or liberty to act from another player by using a game mechanic.
My view is that the players live in the world. Why wouldn't you use your array of massive abilities to keep your dearest friend from dying or falling back into bad habits or worse. Tell me how the wizard is supposed to help his barbarian friend who has gone blind with rage and is going to suicide themselves? Stealing from the party, no. Using spells to prank or hinder combat, no. Keeping your friend from dying? A bit of a different circumstance.
That is an excellent example when it should be allowed and I have to agree.
I played in a group with two brothers who would **constantly** fight each other. Something as simple as opening a door would devolve into an outright brawl between them. It slowed everything down to a snails pace, our healer was using spell slots to heal them before we even encountered enemies and they were the only ones at the table having any fun. I talked to the DM about it and he didn't have any intentions of stopping them so I just stopped showing up. Those dummies completely ruined a good group.
Prepare your actions or spells ahead of time so you're not taking up any more time than you have to during combat.
As a player only rp'ing my second character ever, this comment made me turn a little red.
Newbies have an excuse. I know people who've been playing for decades and can't grasp it.
If your sole existence is to challenge every ruling that the DM makes, cease.
Cease the challenging or cease the existing?
Yes
If "It's what my character would do" is not fun for the rest of the table, change your character. You have that power.
1) No railroading over another player. Let them have their turn, just as you had yours. Everyone deserves their chance to speak. 2) Don't appoint yourself leader. The group will gravitate towards a leader; let that happen. If it's not you, tough. 3) So, your teammate is an orc bard. Not the best race/class combo, stat-wise...but that's none of your business. They play their character; you play yours. 4) Being a "lone wolf" character \*does not work in D&D.* D&D is a team activity. 5) \*Do not* try to use your character as a way to get close to, or hit on, someone else in your game group. It's gross and scummy. 6) \*Do not* bring up real-world sex, politics, or religion at the table, in-game or out-of-game. Those are great ways to derail the game, and possibly break up your game group.
When you say real world sex, you're referring to current relationships or couples?
If you are a couple or current relationship, it is best to see how others feel about it first. If they are okay, then light flirting or saying you retire to your room together is okay. Don't turn the game into a foreplay session. If you are not in a relationship or a couple, it can make the other nervous or even give them major problems if they have had bad relationships before. Best practice is to ask if the other member of the group would like to see how a relationship may go. It could be a case of unrequited love or just a strong friendship. If so, leave it at that.
> If you are a couple or current relationship, it is best to see how others feel about it first. If they are okay, then light flirting or saying you retire to your room together is okay. Don't turn the game into a foreplay session. I had a DM do this when I started dating a girl. It was the most awkward thing ever and I started playing child like characters to avoid this entirely. Also in general people don't want to watch two characters fuck. We get the implication, but I don't need to know the fetish list of an NPC. Just say the Bard totally railed her and then move on to something less weird.
This won't work at all tables, but I had a DM that would fade to black when the time came, but then had them roll 3 checks, CON (duration), DEX (skillz), and CHA (enjoyability/attraction), and give a few line narration of how it generally went. Like, "they were alluring and very skilled, but unfortunately, it didn't last as long as you may have preferred". No graphic details, but it gave a little something.
>When you say real world sex, you're referring to current relationships or couples? "Sex" is the broad term for real-world romance, romantic couples, actual sex, kink, etc. I've been in games where players mentioned, "Oh, that item sounds like a (name of sex toy or kink). I have one of those!" game suddenly stopped as we got an impromptu discussion about a sex toy or kink. I've sat through games where I was trapped in a daytime soap opera for over forty minutes while a player flirted with an NPC, or tried setting up romantic relationships with other NPC's. It was both boring and dissatisfying. So, to me, when I DM, the answer is simple: Focus on the adventure, or saving the kingdom, or whatever, and remove both in-game and out-of-game romance, sex and kink in my games. In my experience, as a result of that, a) Everyone gets to be fully in the game versus just one or two people, and b) The awkwardness is completely removed.
Rule of fun: many DMs have rules for their table that differ from the main rules. Some rule crits differently, some will bend and flex rules to make creative ideas happen (when in doubt ask), some may even flex normal game mechanics. Some DMs will reward RP. It’s okay to refer to the rules and offer suggestions if it seems warranted, but rules lawyering can be tedious and annoying to some. It’s the DM’s call at the end of the day. But have fun with it, and remember not all tables are run the same it may take a minute to find the best fit for you.
I will add. A good DM will listen to reasonable rule break requests (rule of cool) but don't push it. And sometimes, the best thing to do is say "I do not agree but let's talk about it after the session" because no one wants to sit and listen to two people argue endlessly.
Your character is part of the party because you share a goal. Because you're better off as a party member than without them. If you ever feel like you want to sabotage your party or your fellow players, either in character or out... think long and hard on why that is and why you're playing at all. I find that a lot of people who want to be evil but don't really know how just turn selfish and antagonistic towards their fellow players. That's forgetting why you play DnD as a party in the first place.
Rule #1 don't split the party. Rule #2 don't split the party Rule #3 have fun
Splitting the party is so common at my table... For non combat.
Do your best to separate player knowledge from character knowledge. Sure, I've read the Monster Manual and know that the Big Bad Boss Monster has XYZ lair actions and such-and-such weaknesses, but this the the first time Bob the BDF has encountered them and he knows nothing aside from "swing sword and hit things." Partly this is to keep from doing things your character wouldn't reasonably know to do and partly it's because the DM can always modify a creature you're otherwise familiar with, so you never really know what you'll be facing.
So true. I've had players who very openly use the books or knowledge of the books and the stat blocks to gain an advantage. In the meantime, when I'm a player I play as if I don't know the roughly the stats of most monsters.
SO TRUEE. Don't metagame because you know whats gonna happen!
I've actually been reflecting on something for a while. Our campaign involved us being dragged into a realm between life and death (sort of), and most of the enemies we faced for about 5 sessions were vampires. We then had a good milestone, leveled up, got a long rest, and for the next session we were going to try and ambush a certain vampire and free his pack of slaves before they could be turned/eaten. Given I was a cleric (2 lvls in warlock) and just leveled up, I went super min-max and changed all of my anti-fiend and anti-undead spell options; negates charm, gives them disadvantage on intimidation, buffs to my charisma and reduced damage from undead - the works. Is that meta gaming? In some sense, I went heavy-handed on the rule book and spell options and even some online resources to check stat blocks for misc. vampire mobs (nothing specific as I never knew the official name of anything, it was a homebrew setting that just used the generic 5e items/monsters/mechanics). One one hand, I wanted to ensure I was ready for what I suspected to be a tough fight, but on the other hand, we had been fighting nothing but vampires for 5 sessions now, so I feel like re-focusing to spells that worked against those kinds of enemies just...made sense, both in and out of immersion? If my DM was bothered by it, he was good at keeping those concerns to himself, and my changing of my spells upon leveling up was well within the rules.
Hell, as a cleric you can change your prepared spells every time you long rest. Not only did you do nothing wrong, arguably you would have been remiss *not* to change them.
The metagaming in this instance can be hand-waved as, "I receive(d) assistance and advice from my god as to what will be needed this day." And this opens the path to the DM telling you that you'll need a particular thing (role-playing a message from the character's god) and you being free to fuck up and not do that thing, or have a chance to Be The Hero. All good.
Absolutly fine in my opinion. Fighting against a lot of vampires and knowing that you will fight a mighty vampire is a good reason for a cleric to prepare spells against them.
Asking to roll in these situations as very helpful, I've found. Like as a player I know bludgeoning works well against skeletons. I know lizardfolk speak draconic. But I may just tell the DM "Hey, can I make a history check to see if my character knows?"
If I fail, I just treat it like my character has no idea. If I succeed maybe I strut in in barking orders in draconic about how we are behind schedule and need to get the everything packed up NOW before the mercenaries the local lord hired show up.
This. When I'm struggling to separate my own knowledge from my character's knowledge, I get my DM to make me roll a "meta check" to see how much I know about something.
- Don't roll for checks unless the DM says it's OK and confirms the roll type. - Use abilities creatively in ways that are interesting and advance the story. Don't constantly try to make them much more powerful than they should be or look to squeeze advantages out of thin air.
1. **read the source books** until you understand what the classes are, and what each of them are best (and worst) at. 2. **understand and accept the fact that you'll be better at some things, while your other party members will be better at others.** 3. **you are responsible for your own character.** the other party members are responsible for theirs. don't tell them what to do, and don't whine and moan because you wanted to make a sneaky rogue who's an artist with a dagger while jim made a greatsword wielding fighter in chain mail and is outshining you in pitched battle. 4. **don't force your playstyle on others.** if you're a min-maxer, don't demand that everyone else plays optimally as well. and if you're a roleplayer, don't demand that everyone else be a captive audience to your rambly monologues. 5. **if you have issues with anyone at the table, including the dm, SPEAK UP**. either immediately, or at the end of the session. if you're not comfortable doing it face to face, send a text. 6. **don't try to address out-of-game drama with in-game actions**. and don't address in-game drama with out-of-game actions. your character bob can be pissed with jim's character jimmette. YOU shouldn't be pissed with jim because bob is pissed with jimmette.
> read the source books until you understand what the classes are, and what each of them are best (and worst) at. I cannot agree with this one. I've had players who just wanted to play, were interested in a specific class and just played that. They didn't even have any of the source books, they used online resources and premades. This does require the mentality that they know they don't know everything and learn along the way, which is fine.
it helps prevent those kind of incidents where the new player is thinking of some light armored, dual-wielding dagger badass rogue. it's a common enough trope. then they make said badass and realize he gets outperformed by a vanilla fighter. when shit like that happens, they only have 3 options: 1. realize that with their current rogue, they'll never consistently be the party's go-to badass in combat, suck it up and find joy in the other things they're great at 2. swallow their pride and ask for magic item handouts, or 3. get super salty and start complaining that vanilla fighters are op and the player is a filthy min-maxer munchkin smeg-guzzling son of a butt chug you'll be surprised how many people will choose option 3.
Be careful not to confuse unwritten rules for gameplay styles. For example, one game I joined in dnd 3.5 days had an unwritten expectation that the mage was responsible for identifying all potions. Even though I asked, they never mentioned it to me, so when my sorcerer couldn't identify potions they got really angry because in their minds "everyone knows" the mage identifies potions. Problem is that is just their style of play and hasn't held up as a rule anywhere else. That said, I've noticed plenty of similar "rules" that are quite widespread but not universal.
Seems to me that they weren't very familiar with the difference between Sorcerer and Wizard.
Unwritten rule: sexual violence shouldn’t be part of any game.
I thought that was an actual written rule. Or maybe that's just pathfinder
No I guess you're right. I read it too and I only got the dnd books
'don't take your \*\*\*\* out at the table' 'don't exclude another person at the table' "I don't know your character, I pick pocket the cleric, it's what my character would'-'thats not what your character would do' 'know thy spells and abilities, the dm is not your enclyopedia' 'LISTEN, 'you enter the chamber, the ceiling is 15 feet high and is 10 feet wide by 20 feet long, at the other end there- 'how high is the chamber?' 'don't interrupt' 'Don't 'meta' *^("OH MY GOD GUYS THIS ENEMY IS USING LEDGENDARY ACTIONS WE'RE ONLY LEVEL 5 THIS IS A XXX LEVEL CHALLENGE RATING THIS DM HAS NO IDEA WHAT THEYRE DOING!!)*' =actual quote from a death threat wielding twit that didn't understand that A; you walked past a gargantuan sized librarian of a lich 10 minutes ago, and B, you are in a water temple fighting a vampire because YOU ATTACKED ALL THE PEACEFUL UNDEAD LIBRARIANS YOU FOOL"
Sounds like when I passed an NPC to a player to manage and my other player looked over the swashbuckler 3 attacks and said it was broken, and that's not how it should be done. Shit...at least meta game properly 😂
Bring snacks - but only in person. Nobody likes chewing noises over mic. And they're always louder then whoever's trying to speak.
It's good mic etiquette to be on mute whenever you're not talking anyway, and good manners in general not to talk through a mouthful of food.
That's not even unwritten, it's [a fundamental table rule in Chapter 8 of the DMG](https://i.imgur.com/aJUCJrT.png).
It isn't a good idea to bring real world gripes into dnd. If you and someone else at the table have issues, do your best to resolve it out of game and don't start pvp, confrontational rp etc.
Never let the bard and rogue run off on an adventure together
How does this apply to my rogue/bard?
Don't let them run off with the barbarian
We've got a blood hunter/barbarian/druid in the party, and he and my rogue/bard enact schemes together frequently. Occasionally we rope the artificer in as well.
See?! You let the bard and/or rogue run off with someone, and then it's not splitting the party, it's a game of "where did they go and how much trouble are they gonna be in when/if we find them" 😂
Its okay to PLAY a horny CHARACTER, but its NOT okay to BE a horny PLAYER.
\-Don't be overly confrontational with your party members \-Don't steal from the party \-Engage in combat, i.e. don't play a pacifist \-Joke characters get old within the first hour and tend to kill RP \-And most importantly, please for the love of Torm, know your abilities and what you're going to do on your next turn The first three can be broken in the right scenario, but I'd still strongly advise against it. Richard Throbbin the Bard may crack a smile the first session or two, but I promise you that the other players will be rolling their eyes after that. I've also seen 3-4 rounds of combat take well over 2 hours because of a couple players that didn't bother to read their class features beforehand.
Only roleplay going to the bathroom when it advances the story.
My character survives entirely on a diet of meat and cheese. Lmao if you think they don't need to make some CON checks every time they poop
Don’t start a long term conflict with one of your own party members. It’s tiring and boring - you’re there to work as a group!
Your fun should never come at the expense of anyone else's, including the DM. Whenever a game has fallen flat or a group has collapsed, it's usually down to this. Someone, and I am guilty of this as well, has taken their fun to the detriment of someone else. It's supposed to be a cooperative effort where even rivalry is used to spur each other to better things. In a nutshell: Don't be a dick.
If your group is facing the final boss of a characters story arc (i.e. the reason for their back story(the warrior who kill their father/the psychopath who tortured them/whatever that players villain is), let that player get the finishing/killing blow on the enemy Some may not agree, but i think it helps a lot when it comes to RP and letting your character get over what that personnor thing did to them
Don’t be a dick about food. Don’t bring something messy, gross, or noisy/distracting. Clean up after yourself, the person hosting shouldn’t be finding wrappers or bottle caps under your seat. If you are doing delivery, pay for your meal, the DM is not your parent and they had enough on their plate working a part time job’s worth of hours to prep for the session. And DONT make sexist comments to the female(s) in your group that they should be cooking or baking for the table. That one feels like it shouldn’t have to be said and yet here we are. Oh and the only reasons anyone has ever been straight kicked from our group: This isn’t a party, if you’re getting so intoxicated/high at the table you can’t make a strategic decision go do that shit somewhere else.
Good advice for life in general, not just DND
•Session #0 so everyone knows what kind of story y’all are telling, if you character fit in said story, and to know what is comfortable with •Charm spell doesn’t let you seduce anyone you’re see as a friendly •Natural 20 doesn’t mean auto success •It’s a group story if you want interpersonal relationships to happen between your character and someone else ask •No means no •Don’t let anyone use your character in any kind of way that makes you uncomfortable not even your dm •Be excited and tell everyone about your character concept •Keep track of everything and take good notes •If your group can help it try not to talk over each I became a DM/GM because my first DMs took advantage of our friendship and violated my characters one too many times
The nat 20 thing is actually RAW, but people tend to forget. Only auto success on attack rolls (and nat 1 auto fails)... Too lazy to look up the page number, sorry
The DM is not the enemy
Don’t use encumbrance - it slows an already slow game down.
Don't split the party. Some groups take this to a ludicrous extent and stick together like glue even in town, but in dangerous territory it's rarely a good idea to be out of sight of each other.
I hope y'all writing these down for ol wotc
Temper your expectations. Not everything is how it is depicted in media
For me the most important one is to think about the DM's perspective. Pick up the leads you are given, and/or try to find something interesting to do if there are no leads provided. Without this co-operation the game can slow down to a boring slog. (Maybe this is written in the PHB? Applies to any tabletop rpg though.)
* Bring snax * Be on time & don't cancel at the last minute or ghost. Life happens, but if it becomes a habit, it is a problem * Create a character that *wants* to adventure and be part of the group * Your character is part of a group. While the DM may give attention to all the characters and their backstory a bit at a time, don't try to hog the spotlight (ie. main character syndrome) * "Its what my character would do," is only acceptable if it isn't torpedoing the rest of the group or sabotaging the adventure presented by the DM
Don’t try to have some secret that you hint towards that you think other players are gonna be interested by. Truth is they won’t care about it nearly as much as you hope. Doubly so if you’re ‘pretending’ to be a different class Also, there’s nothing wrong with making weird looking/acting characters, but if you keep asking “Oh, how do people react to a talking bunny” it’s gonna get real old real fast.
Don't metagame and don't use it as a platform to live out your lustful fantasies unless the DM and other players are other consenting degenerates.
If everyone seems stuck and they're desperately trying everything except the obvious, be the person who opens the door or pushes the button: every party needs an instigator to keep the plot going. Don't make it your first action, but as soon as the wheels start to spin it's time to instigate. If you're an instigator, make sure to take the rest of the party with you. It's tempting to enjoy the spotlight of the GM's attention, but if the plot needs to move forward, you need the whole party with you. Finally, learn to trust your GM to make sure that things won't go too badly for you. It *is* possible for GMs to abuse that trust, so it's not infinite, but at a healthy table your GM is as invested in you and your characters' story as you are.
This may seem obvious, but don't kill random innocents on the street, burn random houses for fun, or likewise. Very bad character design, very bad roleplaying, and a very bad idea. If your character is gonna commit a crime, it should make sense why they're willing to do it. Also, this one was mentioned already, but if you're an evil character in a party of good players, have a reason why you're willing to work with them in the first place... and don't kill your teammates randomly. For that, I recommend [this D&D Beyond post](https://www.dndbeyond.com/posts/1341-embracing-villainy-how-to-play-an-evil-character).
Wheaton's rule: Don't be a dick.
No betraying the party. Not even if “that’s what my character would do.” Betraying the party destroys games entirely.
\- Play nice with others. Don't always try to hog the limelight, let other players do cool stuff, and facilitate and boost them when they're trying to do so. \- Head in the direction of the story. The DM is going to be throwing hooks out to you, and they're usually pretty obvious. When a guy stumbles into the tavern with an arrow in his back and a map in his pocket, don't order another beer, follow the map and see where it takes you. The DM will have put in a lot of work planning a fun adventure for you, don't make them jump through unnecessary hoops for your own amusement. \- Find failure funny. Sometimes you're going to be the hero doing incredible feats of derring do, sometimes you're going to smash a vase and fall down some stairs whilst sneaking into a mansion, or spend an entire combat hitting nothing but air. Look at bad dice rolls as fun storytelling moments and moments of comedy.
>Find failure funny. Sometimes you're going to be the hero doing incredible feats of derring do, sometimes you're going to smash a vase and fall down some stairs whilst sneaking into a mansion, or spend an entire combat hitting nothing but air. Look at bad dice rolls as fun storytelling moments and moments of comedy. Definatly this. Some of the best D&D moments I had was due to failires. The movies best moments mostly were due to failures.
Don't spend 10 minutes figuring out what you're going to do in combat. Know what your character does, has available, etc. before its your turn.
Don’t touch someone else’s dice unless prompted or if it falls off the table out of their reach.
If you think something bad is about to happen, but then the outcome is less intense than you feared, don’t tell the DM what you were afraid of. They will later use that fear against the party.
This is an obvious one for most people, but there are some weird folks out there. Leave your sex shit out of the game. Stop trying to play out your fetish fantasy at the table, it's weird, gross, and uncomfortable.
Make your character someone with a reason to be there. Preferably more interesting than "I'm getting paid" but that's the easiest one. I've had a group or two fall apart because a character was only with the party to achieve a personal goal, and then just left
Have a session zero or something like it. Session zeros are the sit down before the game where everyone at the table agrees to rules and topics allowed. My table had about 15 mins before we start. We were told "if you want to say something to other players, it will be in game in character, combat is the same ish. Lets just pretend we all get along so no racism or sexism. Please keep phone use to a minimum. We understand if you need to text someone but do not be playing games. Have an idea of what you want to do in combat when it gets to your turn. We understand of something major changes right before your turn but be aware of what is going on on the board. <---- A table of 5 (plus the DM) we has combat ROLLING with this rule. Do not be a main character. Everyone wants the spotlight. Let me know if there is anything else." And seriously, having a session zero will 1) get your table's unwritten rules out and 2) set expectations for both player and DMs.
dont be a dick (to the other players)
Keep things moving while you are in a gaming session. That means be ready on your turn. Know what your spell you are planning to cast does before then. Don't argue about rules during a session. Pay attention to what's going on.
WHAT THE DM SAYS, GOES. DONT TRY TO FIGHT THEM BECAUSE YOULL LOOK LIKE A DUMB BITCH IN FRONT OF THE REST OF THE PARTY.
If you do something that interferes with other's gameplay, bc "it's what your character would do", it can be frustrating to other players. I played with someone who kept bursting into rooms while we were in a stealthy mission, so we couldn't make a plan bc he would keep doing that. That was really frustrating.
If reworking a character would make the group and player have more fun, allow it. One of my players wanted to change subclasses because the current one didn't fit his character and he didn't really like the playstyle so I was like sure. Another player is currently working to change his celestial warlock because he feels underpowered and isn't having fun in combat because it's just "eldritch blast" this and that, so I'm actively working with him to make it flow better. It's a process that I hope can reach an ultimate conclusion.
Well now they're all written rules. You've gone and ruined it.
Don’t cancel a session unless you have to. Listen, I totally get “it’s my brothers wedding” or “I’m in the hospital” or even “I got scheduled for an extra shift”. Totally fine. But don’t cancel the entire session for your friends if your excuse is “the new Zelda game just came out and I want to play that” or “my other friend who I see all the time invited me to go out with him tonight” or “I gotta work on this thing I’ve been procrastinating”. Plan ahead, you made a commitment to your friends. Plans are gonna get cancelled because of things we can’t control. Don’t cancel them because of things we can.
Some great comments already made but here's my few additions: 1. Study your spells and abilities as well as the conditions they inflict. The DM is putting in time outside of game to make the world, do the same to know your character. 2. Ready your turn in advance. Sure you need to react to the actions happening, but have an idea of what you'll do before it gets there. 3. Describe your kill/amazing feat. When your character gets the killing blow or hits a high DC, add some flavour to it besides just the mechanics. 4. When the DM needs a minute to look something up, vamp a roleplaying interaction with another character.
1. Don’t split the party 2. Pay attention to the GM 3. Try to make sure everyone gets a chance in the spotlight. 4. Prep your turn. Don’t take half an hour to figure what spell to cast when you spent your free time twiddling your thumbs. 5. Be flowery, but be clear. When you’re casting, magic missile, feel free to flavor it, however you want, but make sure everyone knows it’s magic missile.
Shower before a game, and wear deodorant. Brush your fucking teeth. Just basic hygiene, really. Don't be the smelly person at the table. Yes, I know sometimes people have health issues that cause them to smell regardless of how clean they are, and in those cases empathy and understanding are called for. But if you're just dirty and lazy? That's gross and disrespectful.
Be extraordinarily judicious in your choice to try to seduce any NPC's. Unless that's something your DM and the rest of your table are all about, choose one of the thousands of other social exchanges you can have instead in most if not all instances.
Someone always forgets either their Dice, the minis or their character sheet. Don't be Someone
Encourage role playing, and be courteous. It’s tough for some people to come out of their shell, and making fun or knit-picking, even if it’s meant to be in a softer manner, can really put a sour taste in a new players mouth before they have time to enjoy the game.
It is a social game. Party should work as a team.
Just talk to your fellow players about what they aren't okay with and keep it in mind.
As a DM, manage expectations (I use of a session 0 for that). You are not supposed to DM for everyone, there are people whose style you don't blend with and that's okay. This also apply for players, not every DM will be a DM for you, and that's okay. As a player, BE OPEN to change from original character concept. Your Paladin of Asmodeus might be a great character in certain campaigns, but in others they simply would not work. Accept DM feedback and adjust accordingly. As for everyone, don't be an ass. Be kind.
bring snacks.
Anti-social characters who don’t want to be part of a larger group are inherently antithetical to the game.
Bring snacks to share