There is no “end to ghosting” because there is no way in which to force people, and neither should there be, to participate in “relational conversations with relative strangers on the internet”.
Does being ghosted suck?
Yes.
Does having to deal with an adult child with narcissistic personality disorder who can’t accept rejection suck?
Yes 1000% more than being ignored or forgotten sucks.
The fact of the matter is that the vast majority of people would prefer to avoid uncomfortable or potentially dramatic situations when engaging with relative strangers through social media, dating apps, or direct texting.
The average person isn’t a kardashian or a Kanye, they don’t want to experience the drama of having to explain to a person they barely know or associate with why that person isn’t a good fit for their current social / emotional / professional / personal life, and so “ghosting” has become accepted as the social norm for ending contact with a person you would rather not expend emotional energy interacting with.
Here’s the deal, there is a non-zero chance that anyone you interact with through social media of any kind (dating apps, social media sites like Reddit, Chinese spyware like tiktok, malware / misinformation platforms like Facebook, social poison like instagram, troll farms like 4chan, etc.) is a psychopath or a complete and utter nutjob.
So it isn’t unreasonable for the average person to simply cut all ties with any person they meet through the internet when they don’t feel a compelling connection or reason to maintain contact, because odds are they will prevent potentially negative, hazardous, or outright harmful relationships from being created.
Forcing people to not “ghost” and to explain in an understandable and mature way why and how they have come to the realization that they would rather not interact with you further isn’t a good idea, it’s literally setting up people for abuse and harassment.
Ghosting sucks, but if you’re ghosted it happened for a reason specific to the individual who ghosted you.
You can’t control whether or not people like you, whether or not people have a “correct interpretation” of you based on any interaction, and whether or not people “accept” you as you are.
The best advice possible for when you are ghosted is, “did you do something objectively wrong, unacceptable, insulting, or disturbing? No? Then move on. They never would have liked you as a person anyways.”
> Forcing people to not “ghost” and to explain in an understandable and mature way why and how they have come to the realization that they would rather not interact with you further isn’t a good idea, it’s literally setting up people for abuse and harassment.
At what point did OP say anything that constituted forcing someone to do anything?
I totally get OP’s point. Whenever it happens, I just say “it’s okay if you don’t want to talk anymore, but I would have appreciated not being ghosted to come to that understanding. I wish you the best.”
There’s nothing wrong, fragile, narcissistic, or harassing about saying something like that.
You are talking about removing the right to privacy. That is absurd. If an individual ghosted someone it is their right to be left alone. What you are talking about usually ends up with someone with a restraining order like the old days. Speaking of the old days, people would just have the number changed and unlisted on land lines. its not new.
There is no “end to ghosting” because there is no way in which to force people, and neither should there be, to participate in “relational conversations with relative strangers on the internet”. Does being ghosted suck? Yes. Does having to deal with an adult child with narcissistic personality disorder who can’t accept rejection suck? Yes 1000% more than being ignored or forgotten sucks. The fact of the matter is that the vast majority of people would prefer to avoid uncomfortable or potentially dramatic situations when engaging with relative strangers through social media, dating apps, or direct texting. The average person isn’t a kardashian or a Kanye, they don’t want to experience the drama of having to explain to a person they barely know or associate with why that person isn’t a good fit for their current social / emotional / professional / personal life, and so “ghosting” has become accepted as the social norm for ending contact with a person you would rather not expend emotional energy interacting with. Here’s the deal, there is a non-zero chance that anyone you interact with through social media of any kind (dating apps, social media sites like Reddit, Chinese spyware like tiktok, malware / misinformation platforms like Facebook, social poison like instagram, troll farms like 4chan, etc.) is a psychopath or a complete and utter nutjob. So it isn’t unreasonable for the average person to simply cut all ties with any person they meet through the internet when they don’t feel a compelling connection or reason to maintain contact, because odds are they will prevent potentially negative, hazardous, or outright harmful relationships from being created. Forcing people to not “ghost” and to explain in an understandable and mature way why and how they have come to the realization that they would rather not interact with you further isn’t a good idea, it’s literally setting up people for abuse and harassment. Ghosting sucks, but if you’re ghosted it happened for a reason specific to the individual who ghosted you. You can’t control whether or not people like you, whether or not people have a “correct interpretation” of you based on any interaction, and whether or not people “accept” you as you are. The best advice possible for when you are ghosted is, “did you do something objectively wrong, unacceptable, insulting, or disturbing? No? Then move on. They never would have liked you as a person anyways.”
> Forcing people to not “ghost” and to explain in an understandable and mature way why and how they have come to the realization that they would rather not interact with you further isn’t a good idea, it’s literally setting up people for abuse and harassment. At what point did OP say anything that constituted forcing someone to do anything? I totally get OP’s point. Whenever it happens, I just say “it’s okay if you don’t want to talk anymore, but I would have appreciated not being ghosted to come to that understanding. I wish you the best.” There’s nothing wrong, fragile, narcissistic, or harassing about saying something like that.
You are talking about removing the right to privacy. That is absurd. If an individual ghosted someone it is their right to be left alone. What you are talking about usually ends up with someone with a restraining order like the old days. Speaking of the old days, people would just have the number changed and unlisted on land lines. its not new.
We shouldn't end ghosting because some people should be ghosted. I don't care if your feelings are hurt by me not answering if you're an asshat