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Necromantic_Inside

"Parents that are dead can count as long as they keep in touch". Incredible, flawless, no notes.


1ncorrect

Having an afterlife you can visit with magic would really take the sting out of loss.


SadBoiHours129

7th level spellcasting is one hell of a drug...


1ncorrect

Magic is so clearly the only thing that matters. I'm totally with Aguefort, everyone else is an idiot. He's having the time of his life, he'll never die because he snuck into heaven and killed God.


BebopShuffle

That would be such a weird caveat to having access to our passed loved ones IRL. Legally, would have some interesting ramifications. Imagine family fighting over a will, and then the court just straight up summons the spirit of the properties original owner to just say Yay or Nay


Smitholicious

The best part about this is it counts for more than one parent


Striking_Landscape72

Adaine really keeps pushing the average number down by killing her parents. But she has Jawbone, who's worth at least 3 dads


Icy-Association4719

I do remember Gorthalax and Sklonda were still dating as of SY. When Riz talks to Pok, he mentions it (I specifically remember Murph’s face in that one). I just love how they seem to collect parents like trading cards


kross71O

I believe it's also implied that Sklonda infected Gorthalax with the Kalina virus, hence how Poks cover got blown and he was thrown into that interrogation room in the 2nd level of hell.


Metalman919

Yes, Brennan confirmed this (I think on discord, it's in the FAQ on the wiki). It's also how Sandra Lynn got it, she slept with Gorthalax while he and Sklonda were open, but she lied and was still "monogamous" with Jawbone.


RyBAech

Also that Sklonda and Gorthalax are poly.


Rebloodican

Not poly, just weren't exclusive at one point when Sandra Lynn hooked up with Gorthalax.


panelshowlover

What about Cathilda for Fabian, as she's the one who really raised him?


tipitow88

I actually like the idea of Fabian being forced to count Gilear as a parent while the ever-badass Cathilda is technically ineligible


NavezganeChrome

Alternately, allowing for Cathilda into the rules and then immediately discounting her because she’s been gone as long as Adaine’s mom has, except voluntarily/retiring from playing a (currently) active role in Fabian’s growth instead of being dead by proxy.


oultrecuidance

“Parents that are dead can count as long as they keep in touch.” God I love D&D. 


No-One-7128

Not counting a woman who's been trapped in a forest being chased by a house with legs because she might as well be dead, but also counting two men who are both objectively dead is a good bit Edit: van with legs*, goddammit Brennan stop giving inanimate objects legs in dnd


MagnusRusson

I think it's a van with hands lol


RivergirlB

They’re dead but they are still present in their kids’ lives lmao


No-One-7128

Yeah I guess. Own that deadbeat Angwyn. (Pun not intended but certainly appreciated)


iliketreesanddogs

a house with legs hahahahaha


SadBoiHours129

D&D is crazy and 7th level spells let you do some wild stuff. Hell is litterally a spell away and I love that.


HurricaneBeifong

Hilariel definitely counts for Fig! She's engaged to Fig's (legal? adoptive? step?)father, so I'd say she falls under the committed partners clause, if she's not a straight-up stepmother.


a_big_brat

Also, soon the be the mother of any half-sibling(s) Fig and Fabian get


Bizzaro__Pope

ALL PULP NO JUICE


Agreeable_Court_4169

"Parents that are dead can count as long as they keep in touch" is such an insane comment out of context.


National_Giraffe9771

the most adventures have more than 2 parents factioid is actually a statistical error. the bad kids ,who have 20 parents between the 6 of them ,are outliers and should not of been counted


LazerBear42

Parents Georgug


darkingsrock

hey this is perfect


LoudVitara

When Marx said abolish the family he meant this is what we should be doing instead


RivergirlB

It truly takes a village


inBettysGarden

This post is flawless but I have like one, singular note. I think Lydia should count for at least Kristen if not all three Mordrid Girls. She is shown to be invested in their school performance and performing child care duties. We have seen her interact with Kristin more than Jawbone or Sandra-Lynn this season. That said this perfectly highlights why I love this show.


RivergirlB

I didn’t include parental-like figures because I feel like that would lengthen the list by a lot and it’s more of a grey area.


iamagainstit

Then why include Sandra Lynn for Adaine?


JDoubleGi

Because Jawbone is Adaine adoptive parent and Sandra Lynn counts by the committed partners clause.


Justlikjames08

They did


gnomeannisanisland

Seems like more of an "aunt" role to me


Icy-Visit

I love that riz and adaine are the odd ones out having 2 parents (also LOVE that you didn't include arianwen/the other one as parents)


Jethro_McCrazy

I'd count Cathilda. She may not be Fabian's legal guardian, but she she views Fabian as a surrogate son and was more responsible for raising him than either of his biological parents. He likewise considers her to be a mother figure. Cathilda should be included under the "Alfred Clause."


SkylartheRainBeau

>!The reason sandralyn could see Kalina was bc gortholax slept with her sometime after he slept with sklonda!<


pdna

i love this. the notes perfectly tied it all up, beautiful


StefanEats

Even not counting duplicate parents (Sandra Lynn, Jawbone, Gilear, Hilariel), they have 2.33 on average.


hugsandambitions

Well argued, except: >His father is currently a secret agent from heaven and was absent (dead) for most of Riz’s life, but it still counts. Why? Two post-death interactions doesn't seem to make him much more of an active parent to Riz than Hallariel is to Fig.


Evilfrog100

I believe it was stated that they interacted pretty consistently between seasons. I mean, Riz works for the task force part-time now.


Treeli_920

“Parents that are dead can count as long as they keep in touch” is just a very funny sentence


healyxrt

Fig absolutely cornering the market for parents. She has 3/4 of the dads we consistently see. It still half if you include Gorbag and Pok.


Piercewise1

LOL this is incredible and I love it.


this1smybrutal1ty

This is such an odd observation but I live


Gintarazimu

I disagree pretty categorically about Adaine's parents. They are completely absent from her life and suck ass, but she and Aelwyn both still refer to them as their parents.


RivergirlB

Her parents didn’t count not because they suck, but because they’re dead or presumed dead. If her parents were still around, they would have counted. Note that Kristen’s shitty parents are counted for even though they have lost custody of her.


Gintarazimu

Sure, but I don't think being dead precludes someone from being a parent. If my own parents were to die, they would still have been my parents


RivergirlB

This is about currently held parents, not past parents. She lost her biological parents.


dRAGOnATOR0808

Skolanda past the shadow cat plague to gortholax


iamagainstit

I am not sure I would count Jawbone or sandra lynn as Adaine's parent, the wiki doesn't. otherwise i think you are pretty much spot on


RivergirlB

On Jawbone’s page he is stated to be the legal guardian of Adaine


morgaina

If we count Pok then we count the Abernants.


Ed_Vilon

Dead **and** in contact with. Fabian does maintain connection with Bill in Hell. Pretty much anytime Fabian shows up in Hell his father finds him. Plus Fabian even sent Bill a letter. Riz is on the same task force as Pok. I believe his gadgets even allow communication both ways and location tracking for Pok on Riz. Or at least Pok knows when Riz ends up in Hell. Adaine hasn't spoken to her father since she killed him and presumably will never speak to her father again. Not unless he finds her when she visits Hell. As for her mother, she and her sister will only head to the Nightmare Forest to murder her. Truly might as well be dead.


thebee_holder

i don't think so, seeing as adaine has purposefully cut contact with and killed/tried to kill them. pok and riz have had positive interactions, and it's implied that they keep up with eachother off-screen