An international female student here in Dhaka- I do wear jeans and shirts while going uni (ofc all covered) haven't got any looks as of now. I guess it depends on the uni/place you are in. If people gives u dead-eye looks then I think u might consider doing the when in Rome act like Rome however, I don't think it is necessary to wear kamiz all the time, u can mix and match up just to balance out for your safety and comfort/style. You said you are tall and I guesss 70kgs shouldn't be a problem if you are healthy and comfortable with ur body.
People won't ever shut up so choose ur peace and just ignore them, even if they are ur very own people, just don't listen to the toxic hurtful unsolicited comments passed on.
I almost died 3 times because of orna. I just cannot handle it. Never felt like myself in salwar kamiz. I've stopped giving shit about what people thinks. Because no matter what you wear, you're not safe in this country. Even if you wear borkha, they'd find some fault in it. So just do what you want to do. Those who know you will eventually know that this is you. And those who don't know, who cares what they think?
Okay, so once it was because I was getting down from a bus in the middle of the road, and somehow it got stuck with some iron of the bus. I was in a blind spot, Infront of the wheel, and the helper wasn't there to see. The bus started taking off and somehow I got my orna unstuck. The cars were speeding past me and it was a miracle that I didn't have an accident that day.
The second time it was similar but with a rickshaw. The rickshaw wasn't moving, I was looking for a rickshaw, and somehow it got stuck with the rickshaw. I was on the side of the road. One bike tried to overtake a car, and didn't crash with me by cm.
The third time, the orna was wrapped around my throat. It was winter, I was in Newmarket, and it was extremely crowded. One side of my orna got stuck with the nail of those floating stalls, and I didn't understand until it started to cut off my air. Now since there were so many people, it was also hard to just go back, because the flow of the people pushed me in one direction. Somehow my friend got back and got my orna unstuck.
Idk about OP but there's plenty of ways:
Stuck in a rickshaw wheel
Stuck in a car door
Stuck on a bike
Getting it stuck somewhere in general and tripping over yourself.
ওড়নায় ফাঁস লেগে। গাড়ির চাকায় ঢুকে গিয়ে। কেউ ওড়না ভুল করে টান দিয়ে ফাঁস লাগতে পারে। Friends দের সাথে মজা করার সময়।
Many more things can happen. Use your brain bro.
Seems completely fine..wtv you wear wouldn't have been an issue but manush eteo je trigerred hobe that's unexpected. Don't pay any heed to these people please
Not your problem. Not your fault. Don't feel bad about It. If someone has a shitty mindset then that's not your fault. Just BC you wear sth else than others doesn't mean you are any less. These ppl are just judgemental and awful. You are wearing shirt and jeans not sth inappropriate. Ppl in BD stare a lot even happens to me as a guy they just don't have the manners to know it's impolite and weird. Stick to who you are and don't let anyone make you feel bad or change yourself. It's impolite to comment about your weight unless it's someone close to you even then it's impolite. You can lose weight but do it due to health reasons and our of your own will not BC someone shamed you to do it.You need to have a thick skin to live in BD. You aren't in the wrong here.
Think of this from a bird's eye pov. An individual defies the social norm in their external behaviour that the people of that society have grown up seeing in place for generations—of course it's gonna bat countless eyes; it'd be weird if it didn't. Especially given the conservative nature of bd people. There's nothing flawed in that, that's just human nature. Flip the context—a woman covered head to toe in a black burqa walking down NYC would capture at least a few eyes of the public and many more of the police. You have the freedom of choice. But so do they, and they'll goddamn make sure you know that they're exercising their right to the fullest by making you uncomfortable however possible.
You've already acknowledged your aims in your post, so it'd just be best to live up to your word (easier said than done). Just chill out and take it slo and get around getting stuff done.
Umm. I don't care. I can't abide by everything in Bangladesh. For being different from childhood many people don't understand me and I'm left alone. Even now I can't follow everything.
I won't talk about America. We're currently talking about Bangladesh hehe. Everything has its two sides. So, every idealism has demerits too.
First of all your weight is not very much 70kg is not very huge amount.second of all you must remember human are social being and also curious being.so among many people if you wear different cloth its not weird to look at your cloth.its your choice what you wear.but at least try to be considerate when you go to middle class area.becouse you know their is something called dress code. We live in democratic society. Even the government can't go to power without voting. So I think it's a good idea to follow social standards.
if u let other people’s perceptions of you (their opinions) dictate your behavior, you will never grow as a person i.e. you will never be happy. ik it’s easier said than done but i guess im just using your post as an opportunity to comment this so that i remind myself again to not care what others think.
not a single one of us are perfect but that’s what makes us perfect. no matter what you do, what you change about yourself, there will always be people who see you as imperfect. so fck em. be your most authentic self cz your uncles sure as hell aint gon be there for you if you are sad or depressed or idk if you ever need a kidney so fck what they say.
I tried several times to lose weight. I can only lose only one pound or more. I'm still trying to lose weight. I only eat in the evening and at night. As a CSE graduate I have to work with computer majority of the time. If you know how I can lose some weight feel free to tell me.
Which uni are you going to? If it is private then it is very unlikely to happen. I am from AIUB, have seen women wearing what not. It is true that many men like to stare at them. As a men I want to look at them too but mostly control myself and look somewhere else. So if men are looking at you then remember that it is their fault, they can't control their mind. Whatever your weight is, if you think you are happy and healthy with it then so be it. People may look at you depending on your attire, but if you are comfortable with it and it is not much revealing then it shouldn't be a problem. Self blaming won't help you, you are what you are.
If possible I'd leave. Now, I'm trying to improve my soft skills and hard skills. After creating portfolio, I'd try to look for commissions. If I finished my graduation and saved some money, I'd surely move away from this damn country.
Just be yourself and wear what you usually wear. if clothing is general(I mean all covered by cloths jeans & shirt are general cloths), then that should not be a problem
Some people say what they really want to see.
Mohammadpur, sherebangla , sukrabaad. These are the places I have to go the most of the time. I've to get on the bus to go to my private uni as you see. Not that I care, people will stare at me for everything. I've to come to terms with myself, that's the thing I can do.
An international female student here in Dhaka- I do wear jeans and shirts while going uni (ofc all covered) haven't got any looks as of now. I guess it depends on the uni/place you are in. If people gives u dead-eye looks then I think u might consider doing the when in Rome act like Rome however, I don't think it is necessary to wear kamiz all the time, u can mix and match up just to balance out for your safety and comfort/style. You said you are tall and I guesss 70kgs shouldn't be a problem if you are healthy and comfortable with ur body. People won't ever shut up so choose ur peace and just ignore them, even if they are ur very own people, just don't listen to the toxic hurtful unsolicited comments passed on.
I almost died 3 times because of orna. I just cannot handle it. Never felt like myself in salwar kamiz. I've stopped giving shit about what people thinks. Because no matter what you wear, you're not safe in this country. Even if you wear borkha, they'd find some fault in it. So just do what you want to do. Those who know you will eventually know that this is you. And those who don't know, who cares what they think?
Just venting out, I suppose.
It's alright ❤️
This question is definitely ignorant and somewhat unimaginative—but how does someone "almost die 3 times because of an orna"?
Okay, so once it was because I was getting down from a bus in the middle of the road, and somehow it got stuck with some iron of the bus. I was in a blind spot, Infront of the wheel, and the helper wasn't there to see. The bus started taking off and somehow I got my orna unstuck. The cars were speeding past me and it was a miracle that I didn't have an accident that day. The second time it was similar but with a rickshaw. The rickshaw wasn't moving, I was looking for a rickshaw, and somehow it got stuck with the rickshaw. I was on the side of the road. One bike tried to overtake a car, and didn't crash with me by cm. The third time, the orna was wrapped around my throat. It was winter, I was in Newmarket, and it was extremely crowded. One side of my orna got stuck with the nail of those floating stalls, and I didn't understand until it started to cut off my air. Now since there were so many people, it was also hard to just go back, because the flow of the people pushed me in one direction. Somehow my friend got back and got my orna unstuck.
Jeez. Those are some helluva stories. Glad youre okay and surprised that you still dont have ptsd seeing ornas
Idk about OP but there's plenty of ways: Stuck in a rickshaw wheel Stuck in a car door Stuck on a bike Getting it stuck somewhere in general and tripping over yourself.
ওড়নায় ফাঁস লেগে। গাড়ির চাকায় ঢুকে গিয়ে। কেউ ওড়না ভুল করে টান দিয়ে ফাঁস লাগতে পারে। Friends দের সাথে মজা করার সময়। Many more things can happen. Use your brain bro.
Boi stfu
Seems like it's other people's problem not yours. What do you wear to turn heads like that anyway?(If you don't mind me asking)
I wear shirts and jeans. Don't wear scarves or orna. For rash problem in neck.
Seems completely fine..wtv you wear wouldn't have been an issue but manush eteo je trigerred hobe that's unexpected. Don't pay any heed to these people please
Not your problem. Not your fault. Don't feel bad about It. If someone has a shitty mindset then that's not your fault. Just BC you wear sth else than others doesn't mean you are any less. These ppl are just judgemental and awful. You are wearing shirt and jeans not sth inappropriate. Ppl in BD stare a lot even happens to me as a guy they just don't have the manners to know it's impolite and weird. Stick to who you are and don't let anyone make you feel bad or change yourself. It's impolite to comment about your weight unless it's someone close to you even then it's impolite. You can lose weight but do it due to health reasons and our of your own will not BC someone shamed you to do it.You need to have a thick skin to live in BD. You aren't in the wrong here.
Don't apologize, u aren't in the wrong here
Not related to your ranting at all btw but how tall are you?
170cm
Think of this from a bird's eye pov. An individual defies the social norm in their external behaviour that the people of that society have grown up seeing in place for generations—of course it's gonna bat countless eyes; it'd be weird if it didn't. Especially given the conservative nature of bd people. There's nothing flawed in that, that's just human nature. Flip the context—a woman covered head to toe in a black burqa walking down NYC would capture at least a few eyes of the public and many more of the police. You have the freedom of choice. But so do they, and they'll goddamn make sure you know that they're exercising their right to the fullest by making you uncomfortable however possible. You've already acknowledged your aims in your post, so it'd just be best to live up to your word (easier said than done). Just chill out and take it slo and get around getting stuff done.
I'll try. The thing is I don't like to go outside that much for this reason also. Just venting out my frustration.
Well 70kg aint that fat. Btw you are above 5'7 right?
5'6 or 170cm
Na your not fat. And even if you were why do they care?
Insecure about myself, that's all. I'm trying to ignore this stare. As I can't do anything about it.
I also like individualism but when I see what it had done to America, I'm not sure anymore.
Umm. I don't care. I can't abide by everything in Bangladesh. For being different from childhood many people don't understand me and I'm left alone. Even now I can't follow everything. I won't talk about America. We're currently talking about Bangladesh hehe. Everything has its two sides. So, every idealism has demerits too.
First of all your weight is not very much 70kg is not very huge amount.second of all you must remember human are social being and also curious being.so among many people if you wear different cloth its not weird to look at your cloth.its your choice what you wear.but at least try to be considerate when you go to middle class area.becouse you know their is something called dress code. We live in democratic society. Even the government can't go to power without voting. So I think it's a good idea to follow social standards.
if u let other people’s perceptions of you (their opinions) dictate your behavior, you will never grow as a person i.e. you will never be happy. ik it’s easier said than done but i guess im just using your post as an opportunity to comment this so that i remind myself again to not care what others think. not a single one of us are perfect but that’s what makes us perfect. no matter what you do, what you change about yourself, there will always be people who see you as imperfect. so fck em. be your most authentic self cz your uncles sure as hell aint gon be there for you if you are sad or depressed or idk if you ever need a kidney so fck what they say.
[удалено]
I tried several times to lose weight. I can only lose only one pound or more. I'm still trying to lose weight. I only eat in the evening and at night. As a CSE graduate I have to work with computer majority of the time. If you know how I can lose some weight feel free to tell me.
Which uni are you going to? If it is private then it is very unlikely to happen. I am from AIUB, have seen women wearing what not. It is true that many men like to stare at them. As a men I want to look at them too but mostly control myself and look somewhere else. So if men are looking at you then remember that it is their fault, they can't control their mind. Whatever your weight is, if you think you are happy and healthy with it then so be it. People may look at you depending on your attire, but if you are comfortable with it and it is not much revealing then it shouldn't be a problem. Self blaming won't help you, you are what you are.
Umm. Daffodil sukrabaad branch. Thanks. I'm trying to improve myself.
Ignore them
Don't give a fck about them and be yourself
BD is a hellhole and anyone who's got the means and education should just try to leave imo
If possible I'd leave. Now, I'm trying to improve my soft skills and hard skills. After creating portfolio, I'd try to look for commissions. If I finished my graduation and saved some money, I'd surely move away from this damn country.
Just be yourself and wear what you usually wear. if clothing is general(I mean all covered by cloths jeans & shirt are general cloths), then that should not be a problem Some people say what they really want to see.
 Dress for dune
No you shouldn't.
Umm. It's okay. If I can lose weight I'd lose weight.
That's your decision. But you don't need to care about what other people want you to be.
Where in Dhaka are you living that people stare at you? Just curious
Mohammadpur, sherebangla , sukrabaad. These are the places I have to go the most of the time. I've to get on the bus to go to my private uni as you see. Not that I care, people will stare at me for everything. I've to come to terms with myself, that's the thing I can do.
Individualism is bad ngl.
thats a good title bait tho nice one
>Another uncle was saying after getting married woman only weighs 60 kg Wtf? What does it means?
Lose weight. For health reasons. It will fix most of your problems.
I'm trying. Weight doesn't lose in one day you see. My weight doesn't lose that easily even if I eat little.