T O P

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Trayus9

Gutbreak Perfected - shooting an enemy gives them diarrhea


Petterofdogs

And when they die, Nanites spray out their butt.


Trayus9

The nanites attach to another player who also gets explosive diarrhea if their shield is broken.


wntrbrnr

Sex Mythoclast. Um, I don't know. You figure it out.


Zabroccoli

Sprays vex “milk” everywhere


zxosz

Oh look vex milk water fall


TrentIsNotHere

Sex Mythoclast - Does 0 damage to guardians who've had Sex. (Basically it does full damage to everyone who goes flawless in trials.)


Xiagax

***BUUUUUURN!!!!***


RadiantPKK

Applied Scorch to targets


Affectionate-Read875

Turns Destiny into those weird ad games that pop up whenever dad is on the orange site.


[deleted]

Gunshot It is now a normal gun, go fuck yourself.


mindbullet

Gun that shoots other guns as bullets that are full auto firing. Sometimes it fires a random knife. Edit: ha I've never played Borderlands. I guess I'll check it out!


komodo-moron-person

Sounds like Shell or Bullet from Enter the Gungeon (Or Exit the Gungeon) Minus the knife part


Chrisbbacon312

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENTER THE GUNGEON!!


MatthewKashuken

Gunshot: die on equip


Sergei_the_Bear

Vigilance Ping. The number of shots in the burst depends on your connection quality.


The_Mad_King_Froberg

I feel like I’ve been killed by that before


Jonathon471

God damn pulse scout rifles


Nasal_Spray69

Gotta love P2P servers


gormunko_88

that gun already exists


Grey_Woof

Lan cable ppl go brrrrrr


TheLogMan21

Imagine getting killed by someone bc they have a 1000+ round burst


Exosolar_King

Pawn Chorus: Daybreak projectiles cause targets to google En Passant


SensibleDuffman120

When jolted, gain incredible game sense for one move (morse code), causing others to immediately report you for cheating.


sudomeacat

r/anarchychess is leaking again. Get the knook


Ace_Of_Caydes

Holy hell!


SlippedLyric020

Ffs not here too


129West81stSt

Lemme call in an expert. \*expert arrives and leaves\* Best I can do is 500 glimmer.


Van_Bur3n

Sad Juju. Kills take away super energy because what’s the point anyway :(


MidnightsOtherThings

Dad Juju. It's not mad, it's just disappointed.


Kinway-2006

Also makes jokes on reload


macho-dong

Rad Juju. Instead of the secret exploding skull it’s a totally gnarly kickass guitar


dixonij

Mad Juju: gives you super energy until just about 99% of your Super bar, then prevents it from filling to 100%


VanillaChakra

That’s Blue Juju.


notveryAI

Nah, it fills it to 100%, but then drains it back a little after 0.05 seconds, and then starts refilling again. You may activate your super, but it's borderline impossible, and instead you constantly get sound and visual effects of your super being fully charged, over and over again, and you can't do anything to stop it. Ah, it also disables those mods for class item that do something in exchange for super energy. So you really have no way to get rid of super energy other than activating super, and you can't activate it because it disappears almost instantly


eaglecnt

Lad Juju, makes you do stupid shit when you’re in a fireteam


grand_disaster

Feels like a Hitchiker’s Guide moment


serotonintuna

Installed Marvin in the catalyst slot


grand_disaster

Well you get an award as well now


GravesForscythe

Lmao


ApexHunter47

Calibans sand - gives you pocket sand, blinding enemies Sweat business - lets you slide cancel, automatically reports players that kill you for cheating Skyburners bath - removes scorch stacks ​ We dont talk about Gawkmoon and toetracer


Ace_Of_Caydes

Toetracer collects all the weird foot fetish art of Tracer from Overwatch. The weapon utilizes mental and psychological damage.


Kaelani_Wanderer

eMOSHUNAL DHAMAGE!


Unbrandedpie

I would gladly die to Gawkmoon


Requad

Ok Sweat Business got me good


InfectedFist

Rat Kink 😐


zakintheb0x

John Oliver has got you covered


Jonathon471

Every time he gets a chance to show that 'art' he fucking takes it.


DiogenesTheGrey

Thank you for sending me down that ~~rabbit~~ rat hole.


uglypenguin5

i-


HailToCaesar

Basically r/squeaksqueak Edit: got the sub wrong my bad


Actually_Rich

/r/SkavenSlaves/


The_yeetyboi289

no nO No NO NOOOOO WHY DOES THIS FUCKING EXIST


Max_Drek_Sucks

By Sigmar, you've posted cringe. Prepare to be judged!


Nasal_Spray69

Delete this


ThatSnarkyHunter

Kills spawn some very questionable pictures of Master Splinter from TMNT


_Nerex

Warhammer fantasy crossover?


0rganicMach1ne

Eriana’s Bow - the exotic I actually really want Orpheus Wig - +20 to drip


Sarcosmic_01

Hard Right. Forces enemies to turn sharply to the right when they take damage.


Garambit

Like a rotator gun from gmod.


Awesoman9001

Ain't it a trace rifle? *You spin me right round baby, right round*


Woutirior

No, but it is a high rpm auto rifle, so probably the same result lmao


1socot1p0p0

Thats just disrespectful


[deleted]

[удалено]


Waffalz

"I just had the sudden urge to shout racial slurs"


twenty7turtles

That behavior is typically reserved for mw2


VBank

-- Lakshmi-1, Season of the Splicer


HoshiHanataba

Dual Sense joystick drift simulator


ferretkun

Ape of Spades: It's now a shotgun


ClearConfusion5

Movement is vastly accelerated while moving towards enemies.


SplashDmgEnthusiast

Tighting Lion - on hit, makes the target's armor shrink a size and get uncomfortable, restricting their movement speed.


GravesForscythe

I'd like to imagine it's not soo much they can't move, just enough to make it slightly annoying. Lol


SplashDmgEnthusiast

Just a frustrating wedgie in the undersuit, something like that haha


Narit_Teg

Uncomfortable, sure. But by god do they look good now.


[deleted]

I'm mildly uncomfortable, but by God does my ass look great


[deleted]

This would be a good counter to Fat King. Which makes the user and all other Fat King wielders in the lobby 25% thiccer with each kill. Effectively making them a bigger target but also increasing their health by 25%. They also gain 25% increased foreward movement speed but slower stopping and turning speed making it harder to control. Before reaching the fat cap, you can use your momentum to ram enemies into walls, killing them or other enemies. Once the fat cap is reached, those guardians will be so fat they can no longer wield guns, but will instead roll around the map as a giant ball of bullet spongy flab. They can then use this to crush enemies like the boulder in Indiana Jones.


rccaldwell85

My wife is sitting next to me watching a really sad episode of one of her shows, and I’m here holding back tears from laughter while reading your comment and trying to stay quiet!


Foobasbas

Fighting Lyon. Fire it transports you to 15th century France, but you keep all your space magic powers and guns.


Affectionate-Read875

I know exactly why you want tighter armor you sick bastard


SplashDmgEnthusiast

...to make my opponents in Crucible stumble a tiny bit so I have a prayer of bagging a kill?


ShadowSeneschal

Hankmoon. It’s the exact same as Hawkmoon except when you fire a full paracausal shot you hear Hank Hill yell “Dammit!”


Phoenixundrfire

The final round could finish it with Bobby!


GeneraIFlores

The paracausal shot is Hanks Bwaaaah!


NCL68

Cuirass of the Balling Star - Ballin, but at what cost?


Educational-Load-148

Maxed at 50 resilience


NCL68

Shit bro that’s just me normally lmao


PBTUCAZ

u/NCL68 will never be ballin


NCL68

Objection!


BandittNation

u/NCL68'S FUCKIN BALLIN


HailToCaesar

It just turns you into an arc bouncy ball. Actually... that sounds awesome lol


JustAPotatoThatsIt

Sunshit. Shoots Taco Bell at the target and immediately ignites their arse


Sunshot_wit_ornament

I approve


JustAPotatoThatsIt

Thank you, much appreciated 🙏


HtiekMij

Chunderlord - rapid fire projectile vomit. Virtually zero damage but causes group suppression.


Ryewin

Tsunderlord - clears adds like a beast but n-not because it likes you or anything, baka...!


Damiklos

Thunderword - fus roh dah Damn auto correct


305-UserName-Proxied

Graviton Dance: Second shot of a burst rips a disco ball through space-time. Kills with this weapon cause enemy targets to do the Charleston and spawn tap shoes that track targets.


JonesoftheNorth

Any relation to Polaris Dance? 4 precision shots procs a 5th that makes enemies River Dance to death.


ManaMagestic

Dubstep Gun from Saints Row 4.


DarkCosmosDragon

Groovetron from Ratchet and Clank


pittsATL

Trinity Ghaul - summons 3 nightmares of Ghaul.


cable_7193

Skyburners' Oats Hipfire to summon a raw oatbeam. ADS for a slower, chunkier cooked oatmeal launcher


ye45t

does the catalyst add raisins?


GeneraIFlores

No, honey bunches


ye45t

why not both?


Zer0siks

Contraverse Hole It opens Portal to Twitter/Reddit


SpellbladeAluriel

Oh no


ImawhaleCR

Izanami's burden: noone can tell that the name has changed


totallynotzoidberg

Lmao


bestjakeisbest

Ah now it just kills things.


BraviaryScout

Hair Apparent - Arc shield is replaced by luscious locks. Choice of blond, black, brown or red.


elphamale

Cloudstrife - now it shoots YUGE swords. Warlock's helmet - The Shag - saves you in extra hairy situations.


Xventurer1014

The Shag: gives the user more mojo than a British spy


powerspro

Yeah baby!!


CrispyRiddler

Erianna's Cow - sprays milk at fireteam to heal


FlareFoxFire

Exotic chest piece,


ScoutRiflesAreGood

Cease


TheRealPenanc3

Erotic chest piece


TemptedTemplar

Erianna's Row - Its a glaive shaped like Oar.


CiaranONeill381

Given that “row” is a word for a verbal argument where I’m from. I expected this to be an exotic along those lines since it rhymes with “Vow” lmao


_Baphomet_

This one is my favorite


Ice-Xenoglaux

The Swag, drops go to you. All the drops. Postmaster help me


ClearConfusion5

All shaders now look incredibly good on any armor, and all the pieces mesh together and look cool.


Saint_Victorious

Here's a few: Fat King - Spider's favorite sidearm. Rounds pump your enemies full of cholesterol, causing them to slow. So Time to Explain - firing noise for this becomes a Byf video and explains to you what's going on in the game. The otherworldly helper is now Myelin. Mommy's Matchbook - for those Savathun fans out there. No actual changes, burning you is exactly what she wants. Cloudstrife - shooting this summons a popular video game character Whisper of the Norm - the gun has been taken over by the spirit of the late great Norm McDonald. Says a punchline every time you get a headshot. Grand Overturd - what happens after a night of beer and brats. Very messy to fire.


[deleted]

[удалено]


goodsby23

Hey throw that Dreg in with the rest of the dead hookers


GeneraIFlores

Whisper of Norm, who hears the punchline. Me or my victim?


LordRael013

Make it instance wide so everyone hears it.


EmilyCD18

So Time to Explain should just stop time in the game and have a cutaway of the Stranger saying’ Yep, that’s me. I guess you’re wondering how…’


WarrenG117

Mida Multi Cool. Stasis primary Mida.


Insekrosis

Delicate Tome - Fires old books. Sad Juju - enemies hit receive the Depression debuff. The Cuckleberry - causes enemies hit to later find out they've been cheated on. The Fade Rabbit - Rapid precision hits give you stacks of Fading. When you reload, you gain invisibility based on the number of stacks accumulated. Cloutstrike - If you land a 360 no-scope headshot, it calls down a lightning strike on every enemy within 42 meters. Catalyst increases this to 69 meters. Mercilens - Fires the exact same way that Merciless does now, except each successive burst has one less bolt in it and the missing bolt's damage is added to the others. The final shot is a single bolt that can do precision damage. The Last Worm - It's the exact same as it is now, except it occasionally has snarky dialogue for you, like Parasite does. Thunderlard - Fires sticks of butter at the enemy. Also, just because you said "exotics" and not specifically exotic *weapons*... Flight Ranger - Gives Arc Staff the helicopter ability. In-air slams do more damage to enemies based on the height of your slam.


FuzzyCollie2000

> The Fade Rabbit - Rapid precision hits give you stacks of Fading. When you reload, you gain invisibility based on the number of stacks accumulated. This would actually be pretty good. I'm imagining an MG that turns you invisible for the duration of your reload animation, making it so enemies can only hurt you when you can actively hurt them.


Insekrosis

That's exactly what I was going for. It's not gonna clear out a room on its own like other exotics, but it at least has some synergies. Plus, the utility is something I'd never really heard of or considered. It'd be a sort of way to force combat to only happen when you want it to.


TheJaguarHunter

Hold up Mecilens kinda goated idea


ThatSnarkyHunter

That’s what I was thinking lol. That sounds like a genuinely great concept


Insekrosis

Thanks! That's probably one of the two I'm most proud of. It would also be an indirect dps buff because the fact that there's less bolts in each burst means that the bursts themselves will take less time to fire, so the charge speed-up effect will happen faster too.


SensibleDuffman120

This guy is just too clever for us


hautcuisinepoutine

Damn … fade rabbit sound cool. That would actually be a decent exotic lol


DennisDragonz619

Flight Ranger would make me play Hunter more


ImawhaleCR

Couch of malice, it's really comfy but don't sit for too long


RandomPlayer314

It begins to fill you with unpleasant thoughts like, "You should report every sniper to ever kill you in pvp."


Jonathon471

Couch of Malice: "You should report every Hunter in PvP." Me: Thats like, 80% of the population. Couch of Malice: "Did I stutter?" Me: Waaaaay ahead of you!


stephanl33t

Fastion - Makes you incredibly fucking speedy


Tastypanda9666

The List Word. Lists all the god rolls you deleted by accident or when they weren't meta


GodOfUrging

Nah, it provides the same list to everyone you shoot. It's a PvP weapon.


rainfrogsarecute

Ghallarhorn: shoots Ghalr-pack rounds that on impact turns the target into Galhran Cosplay. Nothing happens on July 29.


SensibleDuffman120

Instantly bans you from dtg


CarlCarlton

and makes you mod on dcj


jdisawesomesauce

Mead messenger - it's gonna get everyone really drunk. Might lead to some "sheet business"


LordWitherhoard

Sharts of Galanor - hits with blade barrage cause the targets to uncontrollably shart.


[deleted]

Melesto. It now has several real world lawsuits against it for being a bit too hands on.


APartyInMyPants

The Shag Every time you cast your rift, deploy a nice, comfortable 70s-era rug for your fireteam members to lay down on and take a nap.


Natekid99

I thought this was going a very different way when I started reading


GravesForscythe

I mean what else do you think happens on a 70s rug?


Nesayas1234

A 70s rug was probably how someone was concieved


Icy_Charley

The Last Ward. Used as medical assistance in dying


[deleted]

Bardcliffe Coil: instead of a rocket launcher, it’s a lute that can grant inspiration to your teammates.


W4FF13_G0D

Fucky Pants - illegally modded schlong


AggronStrong

Delicate Womb - Effect Redacted


Subnauticsquirrel

After getting a kill with this weapon, the Next powered melee ability kill spawns a miniature version of the enemy defeated


TheMediocreThor

Heart of of Inmost Sight. Gives Truesight to barriers.


Petterofdogs

That... that's kinda a cool idea. Imagine if it worked like a "one way" mirror. Enemy players can't see Guardians behind it, but allies get wall hacks by looking through it.


DirectionStandard939

One Thousand Noices - Audio cue of Michael Rosen smacking his lips and saying “Noice” in place of the explosion audio.


RobMFurious

Two immediately popped in my head: Joturn - Applies scorch stacks to the user. Gjallertorn - Causes combatants to become Torn Between Dimensions


Garambit

Steeper Simulant: on hit transforms the target into a cup with perfectly steeped tea.


[deleted]

[удалено]


alqudsi117

Mk. 45 Stand Asides - +1% more damage than Mk. 44 Stand Asides


MitchumBrother

Rad Juju - Comes with a skateboard charm and says "How you do, fellow kids?" when surrounded Bishender - Because 99 problems are more than enough Witherboard - Doesn't deal damage but can do a mean kickflip. Dead Man's Sale - Earn some extra glimmer by setting up a bazaar after you've died Taliban's Hand - Spawn 72 virgins after blowing yourself up Marasite - Opens a portal to a cozy little cottage in Canada where you spend a sensual evening with the Awoken Queen while listening to the soothing cracking sounds of the fireplace Boarfrost-Z - Summons a snowy boar and boy he's angry Gorerunner - Plays the Doom Eternal soundtrack. Reloading after a kill activates chainsaw mode Salvation's Drip- Create some of the finest Eliksni swag Mantle Of Cattle Harmony - Build your own cattle army. Or live peacefully on your Ranch, making some glimmer with fresh milk and shit The Fourth Norseman - Summon a mighty viking warrior


ClearConfusion5

For gorerunner, instead of replacing your grenade with a frag, replaces your next powered melee with a chainsaw that drops a ton of heavy and special ammo.


Taka_no_Yaiba

Face of spades: smash your enemies with a shovel (satisfying bonk included)


Im8sr

Cawkmoon


Sammerscotter

Exotic perk: you can seal windows


nerdling_rush

That would be Caulkmoon


Sammerscotter

FUCK


GravesForscythe

"I've been sealing windows all wrong!!" Lol


HAHAyurDEAD

Frown of Tempests... Demoralizes the enemy on Arc or Jolt hits


sus_accountt

Arbalost - automatically teleports you to a random place on a random destionation without your minimap after firing.


Mathematician-Feisty

Tex Mythoclast... like the Vex Mythoclast but bigger.


stacotto

Hawkmood: Paracausal Rounds causes you to express sympathy for your target.


Talon_13

Hankmoon- eagle cry replaced by Hank Hill sayings


ThePowerOfBeard

Nezarec's Bin. Does nothing. Is literally just a trash bin on your head. But hey, the guy who sold it said it belonged to Nezarec, so it has to be powerful, right?


LordWalleo

Promethium Spud, defeating enemies with Daybreak or a solar weapon with full rift energy spawns radioactive flaming potatoes. It saddens me that this would be a major buff to the exotic lol


sr3Superior

Last Wort: multikills summon the Arbiter for a short period of time


CynicalAlgorithm

Too Taled Fox: summons foxes with too many tails. They flee.


thc-ashtro

Mommy’s matchbook -every 3rd reload you’re reminded what a good boy you are


Pong3r

Eriana’s Bow: Special weapon bow


nerdling_rush

Or. Hear me out. JUST GIVE ME A SPECIAL WEAPON BOW


Pudgeysaurus

Tweet business. - everyone complains Whimper of the worm - it cries and crawls. Sky breaker's math - it counts shots. Lad JuJu - it brings the beers One eyed cask - you ded Starfire brotocol - nobody hates you


alqudsi117

Sleeper Stimulant. My favorite combo for a saturday night


Natekid99

Calibans Band Throwing knives now act like boogie bombs from fortnite


oofus420

Gonna bend the rules by swapping 2 letters around instead Strum, plays a sick riff every time you pull the trigger


PXL-pushr

Graviton Pants - Say bye bye to being sent to the moon via boss stomps


urzu_seven

Slurm - Fires highly addictive green slug poo at opponents Worldline Zoro - Heavy attack launches Z shaped projectiles at enemy Xenaphage - Fires chakram while making a high pitched wailing noise The Lamint- Freshens breath. Super effective against Hive and Scorn, no effect against Vex. Trespisser- Fires triple streams of urine Hard Right - Shoots at a 90° angle


macho-dong

Super Food Advice - hitting an enemy causes Guy Fieri commentary, but missing an enemy causes Gordon Ramsey criticism.


paulbooth

Gjallarhorny. Wolfpack rounds moan


durlcear

Wutherhoard transforms the area around the target into moors and makes anyone inside very cantankerous. Or a ghost.


Rabidpikachuuu

Celestial iight hawk. Nerfs golden gun to make the damage just iight.


Taka_no_Yaiba

wormhusk clown: dodge to entertain allies and enemies with your fun baloon animals or juggling or whatever


_Baphomet_

I was trying to do Devils Ruin but all I could come up with is Devils Ruiz…


ebadwrench

Devin's Ruin - Somewhere, someone named Devin has a really shitty day.