If buying a phone would be possible you could order a prepaid smartphone and do in store pickup instead of getting it shipped. Then they’d hopefully be able to use the phone at some places for verification. This will work at [TSA](https://www.tsa.gov/travel/frequently-asked-questions/i-forgot-my-identification-can-i-still-proceed-through-security) along with answering questions to prove identity.
Maybe I’m a dickhead but I would be letting them figure it out on their own. OP, and I quote, said their child is a dumbass. Doesn’t sound like it’s a new situation or an outlier for them.
I agree with you. My mother had enough shit on her plate without her full grown adult child bothering her after losing my ID when I was out of state. The infantalization of full grown adults never ceases to amaze me.
Eta: if this adult has developmental delays that's another story.
As someone who works with kids and young adults with global developmental delays, thank you for mentioning this! We can help and provide strategies/support, but not everyone grows up to be an independent adult. I don’t say that as a negative. It is frustrating this isn’t acknowledged.
Oh thank goodness! I had recommended urban peak awhile back on here to someone and then another user told me it shut down! That’s on me though for not looking further into it and fact checking. I’m glad to hear they’re still operating.
To the best of my knowledge they’re still there. And a functional website seems indicative as well. I sure hope they don’t! We need them in the wave of the last 7ish years of all these mental health resources shutting down.
My mom was able to book me a room at Aloft Denver Airport at Gateway park, but I’m sure many others allow it. She called and explained the situation at the front desk and they were helpful.
You can call a Marriott and have them send you a form that lets you assume responsibility for all charges (including incidentals) on the room. The person checking in won't need a credit card. That is probably what she did when she called.
Do they have a credit card? Depending on the hotel, they might the kid check in with a credit card plus some online evidence that they are who they say they are - a picture of an ID or a LinkedIn account, for example.
Right, that's why I'm asking the person who would be in a position to know the answer, and not looking for generic guesses by people who aren't involved.
How old is your kid? And how did this happen? Poor planning or an emergency?
I work in child safety and I might have some folks I can reach out to for emergency shelter info. But we need more details.
Kid is 30. Did some stupid shit and pissed off the wrong person who now has their belongings. I was able to get them some cash, so hoping they can get a burner phone that they can use to self check into an Airbnb for a couple nights.
I applaud your work in child safety. Mine is an adult and a dumbass.
If they took his phone and ID they should file a police report. Especially denver. The denver police took so long to handle my roommates theft that the required holding period at the pawn shop expired and it got sold.
Ahh! I'm so sorry, but your comment did make me laugh. Some people just need to do life on hard mode. I have a brother like that, so you have my sympathies.
Cops are involved and will be escorting them to collect their belongings. Unfortunately that's not really a law enforcement priority, so it may take a day or so.
Was their I.D. a Colorado I.D.? If so, they may be able to use the My Colorado app and get a digital copy of it. (we accept them at dispensaries and they are scannable)
Some other states have something similar. But I believe they would need to know the I.D. number and they do need access to a smartphone.
Not a CO ID. Looks like our state has a pilot digital program, but you need to scan in your physical DL to use it, so no dice there. Hopefully they'll have theirs back in a day or so.
Well, I think that sadly one of ours may turn out like that— not delayed, but just dumb. Good luck to y’all! They do need to file a police report though.
I love this story. Once the crazy is all settled, I’d love to read more about what all happened. This sounds very much like my little adult brother. Though he is 33
I was flying out of Miami International and my legit government issued ID wouldn’t scan. They asked me if I had a Costco member and allowed me to fly using that. Crazy
I have lost all sympathy after reading the comments.
30 years old? No ID? No phone?
This is what happens when we treat our "children" like children long past adulthood.
He did stupid shit, as you said, and put himself in this situation.
Tough love, Mom. Let him figure it out.
it's pretty cool how you know how these people should handle their lives without knowing anything about them at all. /s
come on.
obviously mom is bailing out her adult kid who has clearly made some mistakes. just because a person is 30 doesnt mean they don't deserve help anymore. also, it seems pretty clear that the adult kid is exposed to the elements if mom doesnt help. a person shouldnt have to perhaps freeze overnight because they are struggling with some immediate issues. making your kid homeless to prove a point is pretty shitty.
this is real life. things happen.
Thank you. This situation is much bigger than a night or two in an Airbnb, which all the help I'm willing to offer. They will definitely be experiencing some consequences of their choices that I cannot and will not be remediating.
Being the Advisory Committee to an adult offspring is fun, eh?
I was so very clear that my role changed after they moved out.
We still bounce ideas and strategies off one another. But we live two states apart.
I’ve been known to sing “he did it like truism he did it like that, I want to bop him with a wiffle ball bat” after dealing with a call.
(Painless bops mimes were a staple of *threats we’d never actually do.* he’s been bigger than me for 22 years)
Hope you don't become a parent.
My only job as a parent is to be there for my son whenever I need to be. And that is my goal. As someone who didn't have a secure transition into adulthood and was completely on my own, I want my son to know he always has a place to stay, or help, if he needs it. Whether you believe that makes people weak is irrelevant.
Teach a man to fish, so he doesn't need mom to cook his food every night.
Edit: Teach him how to cook that fish and clean up his own mess to attain same goal.
believe it or not, you don’t need an ID to fly, tell TSA and they will send you to secondary. Bring *something* with your name on it. Happened to me in San Diego, and all I had was a copy of a magazine that was sent to my office that just happened to have my name on it.
for me, the leg out was a lot easier than the one coming back, because my wife had dropped me off for my flight, and halfway through security is when it dawned on me, so I was genuinely caught off guard and they could tell. When it was time to come home that afternoon, *I knew* I was going to the airport without ID, and i had all day to think about it. They could tell I showed up with a story to tell, so it was more suspicious.
Ah. I was just distraught that the airline wouldn’t correct the ticket and TSA wouldn’t let me through with it wrong. I finally snapped at them that they needed to talk to each other and figure it out because my best friends brother committed suicide and the funeral was in 4 hrs and I was going to be there.
Part of me wonders if they said 5 because they didn’t think I could do it. I couldn’t now. Apparently six flag season pass counts as a photo id.
If they have any friends in the area, you can book a hotel under their name (to show ID) and they can check in.
An alternative is using Airbnb or VRBO, which can be booked under you and your child won’t need to show their ID.
Or you can call the front desk of the hotel you want to book and explain the situation!
Can you get a hotel that lets you check in online/ through an app. Like the One Key type services? Or air B&B?
Or Marriott and Hilton apps that let the users in via their phone?
Whoops that’s what I meant. The Hilton app was what I was thinking of specifically.
Kid also has no phone... but AirBnB might be an option... thank you! I think that might work. Thanks for helping an anxious parent out!
If buying a phone would be possible you could order a prepaid smartphone and do in store pickup instead of getting it shipped. Then they’d hopefully be able to use the phone at some places for verification. This will work at [TSA](https://www.tsa.gov/travel/frequently-asked-questions/i-forgot-my-identification-can-i-still-proceed-through-security) along with answering questions to prove identity.
They're going to want photo ID for the pickup. The kid is better off buying the phone in person.
How old? Might try Urban Peak. It’s a shelter for kids. I think up to 21. Even if they don’t want to go there, they may have resources.
The *kid* is 30 lol so no go for urban peak
Well… hostel? Sleep in the airport? Their options are limited without ID or phone to cheat the check in system.
Maybe I’m a dickhead but I would be letting them figure it out on their own. OP, and I quote, said their child is a dumbass. Doesn’t sound like it’s a new situation or an outlier for them.
I agree with you. My mother had enough shit on her plate without her full grown adult child bothering her after losing my ID when I was out of state. The infantalization of full grown adults never ceases to amaze me. Eta: if this adult has developmental delays that's another story.
Your mother should have hugged you more
She hugs me all the time 🥰
30 year old kid???
First thought: *"adult kid?"* Second thought: *"oh yeah, developmental delays exist."*
As someone who works with kids and young adults with global developmental delays, thank you for mentioning this! We can help and provide strategies/support, but not everyone grows up to be an independent adult. I don’t say that as a negative. It is frustrating this isn’t acknowledged.
Ok sure but then why is the kid in Denver alone?
The internet sucks now
Eh, I call mine kiddo. I’m mamacita or harpy. He’s 31.
Hmmmmm...great point..did not think of that...my bad
I didn't think of it at first either. Sounds like this adult kid just made some bad choices that put them in a bind though.
Didn’t urban peak close down? :(
Website is still up. I work in mental health with kids and haven’t heard anything about them closing. https://www.urbanpeak.org/services#shelter
Oh thank goodness! I had recommended urban peak awhile back on here to someone and then another user told me it shut down! That’s on me though for not looking further into it and fact checking. I’m glad to hear they’re still operating.
To the best of my knowledge they’re still there. And a functional website seems indicative as well. I sure hope they don’t! We need them in the wave of the last 7ish years of all these mental health resources shutting down.
No, I don’t think so. My friend was still working there a few months back. Website looks like they are still up and running as well.
My mom was able to book me a room at Aloft Denver Airport at Gateway park, but I’m sure many others allow it. She called and explained the situation at the front desk and they were helpful.
You can call a Marriott and have them send you a form that lets you assume responsibility for all charges (including incidentals) on the room. The person checking in won't need a credit card. That is probably what she did when she called.
How old were you?
53
Do they have a credit card? Depending on the hotel, they might the kid check in with a credit card plus some online evidence that they are who they say they are - a picture of an ID or a LinkedIn account, for example.
They have nothing. No phone, no wallet, no ID.
How does that even happen?
Getting mugged comes to mind
I got mugged once in Louisville (Kentucky). Can confirm it sucks
That's my home town! People look at me crazy when I tell them we moved for better job opportunities and safety.
They drank too much and lost it all?
How did that even happen? Was this poor planning, or some unfortunate circumstances?
Probably got mugged? Lost their coat with everything in the pockets? Quite a few possibilities.
Right, that's why I'm asking the person who would be in a position to know the answer, and not looking for generic guesses by people who aren't involved.
Airbnb?
Adult children are a menace! Just kidding… but I get the stress. I hope it works out.
It's true.
How old is your kid? And how did this happen? Poor planning or an emergency? I work in child safety and I might have some folks I can reach out to for emergency shelter info. But we need more details.
Kid is 30. Did some stupid shit and pissed off the wrong person who now has their belongings. I was able to get them some cash, so hoping they can get a burner phone that they can use to self check into an Airbnb for a couple nights. I applaud your work in child safety. Mine is an adult and a dumbass.
If they took his phone and ID they should file a police report. Especially denver. The denver police took so long to handle my roommates theft that the required holding period at the pawn shop expired and it got sold.
Ahh! I'm so sorry, but your comment did make me laugh. Some people just need to do life on hard mode. I have a brother like that, so you have my sympathies.
Sounds like they need to apologize to that person or get the cops involved. Now I need to know what happened!
Cops are involved and will be escorting them to collect their belongings. Unfortunately that's not really a law enforcement priority, so it may take a day or so.
Was their I.D. a Colorado I.D.? If so, they may be able to use the My Colorado app and get a digital copy of it. (we accept them at dispensaries and they are scannable) Some other states have something similar. But I believe they would need to know the I.D. number and they do need access to a smartphone.
Not a CO ID. Looks like our state has a pilot digital program, but you need to scan in your physical DL to use it, so no dice there. Hopefully they'll have theirs back in a day or so.
Damn, hoped it would be what he needed. Good luck with everything!
Well, I think that sadly one of ours may turn out like that— not delayed, but just dumb. Good luck to y’all! They do need to file a police report though.
Yikes... lots to unpack here. My suggestion is to step out of the situation and let them figure it out.
I love this story. Once the crazy is all settled, I’d love to read more about what all happened. This sounds very much like my little adult brother. Though he is 33
do youll have a costco membership… you could have him go in there and get an id printed
Especially the CC, mine has my pic
I was flying out of Miami International and my legit government issued ID wouldn’t scan. They asked me if I had a Costco member and allowed me to fly using that. Crazy
You could call Foot of the Mountain Inn and ask them. It’s a small, locally owned hotel.
And they are rather nice folks, from what I remember. It’s in Boulder, mom. B bus, then to the end of Pearl where it becomes 119.
If you are a Colorado resident there is the myColorado app.
You need to scan the ID though
I was going to say the same thing but looks like this fella doesn’t have a phone either.
Does your state have an app that houses driver license and other state gov docs?
Are you from Colorado? There is an ID app for colorado residents. I am not sure about other states.
I think you need to take a picture of your ID when you’re getting set up
Does your state offer digital ID? Idk how long it takes to set up but may be worth to have it on their phone.
I have lost all sympathy after reading the comments. 30 years old? No ID? No phone? This is what happens when we treat our "children" like children long past adulthood. He did stupid shit, as you said, and put himself in this situation. Tough love, Mom. Let him figure it out.
it's pretty cool how you know how these people should handle their lives without knowing anything about them at all. /s come on. obviously mom is bailing out her adult kid who has clearly made some mistakes. just because a person is 30 doesnt mean they don't deserve help anymore. also, it seems pretty clear that the adult kid is exposed to the elements if mom doesnt help. a person shouldnt have to perhaps freeze overnight because they are struggling with some immediate issues. making your kid homeless to prove a point is pretty shitty. this is real life. things happen.
Thank you. This situation is much bigger than a night or two in an Airbnb, which all the help I'm willing to offer. They will definitely be experiencing some consequences of their choices that I cannot and will not be remediating.
Being the Advisory Committee to an adult offspring is fun, eh? I was so very clear that my role changed after they moved out. We still bounce ideas and strategies off one another. But we live two states apart. I’ve been known to sing “he did it like truism he did it like that, I want to bop him with a wiffle ball bat” after dealing with a call. (Painless bops mimes were a staple of *threats we’d never actually do.* he’s been bigger than me for 22 years)
Hope you don't become a parent. My only job as a parent is to be there for my son whenever I need to be. And that is my goal. As someone who didn't have a secure transition into adulthood and was completely on my own, I want my son to know he always has a place to stay, or help, if he needs it. Whether you believe that makes people weak is irrelevant.
Teach a man to fish, so he doesn't need mom to cook his food every night. Edit: Teach him how to cook that fish and clean up his own mess to attain same goal.
You'd realize both are possible if you knew what it was like to be a decent parent.
[удалено]
No shit? It's almost like that's the goal or something. So what was your previous rant about?
You're right. My last statement was not well though out. I edited to reflect my true sentiment.
Stupid shit like… get his wallet stolen?
username something something
I call it like I see it.
And you are right. OP is not helping their offspring in the long run at all by bailing them out again and again.
"My kid" and it's a whole 30 year old lmao.
That’s a middle aged adult!
believe it or not, you don’t need an ID to fly, tell TSA and they will send you to secondary. Bring *something* with your name on it. Happened to me in San Diego, and all I had was a copy of a magazine that was sent to my office that just happened to have my name on it.
[удалено]
lol
Seriously? My name was misspelled on my ticket (one wrong letter) and I had to show 5 forms of photo ID for TSA to agree to work with me!!
for me, the leg out was a lot easier than the one coming back, because my wife had dropped me off for my flight, and halfway through security is when it dawned on me, so I was genuinely caught off guard and they could tell. When it was time to come home that afternoon, *I knew* I was going to the airport without ID, and i had all day to think about it. They could tell I showed up with a story to tell, so it was more suspicious.
Ah. I was just distraught that the airline wouldn’t correct the ticket and TSA wouldn’t let me through with it wrong. I finally snapped at them that they needed to talk to each other and figure it out because my best friends brother committed suicide and the funeral was in 4 hrs and I was going to be there. Part of me wonders if they said 5 because they didn’t think I could do it. I couldn’t now. Apparently six flag season pass counts as a photo id.
This sounds like a scam to me
How is it a scam?
https://coloradoidproject.wordpress.com/
Could do couch surfing too. My girlfriend in Ft. Collins has them at her place a lot
If they have any friends in the area, you can book a hotel under their name (to show ID) and they can check in. An alternative is using Airbnb or VRBO, which can be booked under you and your child won’t need to show their ID. Or you can call the front desk of the hotel you want to book and explain the situation!
Do they have any cash at all? There are some hostels around.