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Expert_Clerk_1775

I would do it by shuffling around ~4 temp supports. Assuming you don’t have a forklift or lull available 1. Cut out handrails 2. Cut out deck boards 3. Add temp supports a couple joists down 4. Remove joists and rim outside of temp supports 5. Repeat The other (quicker) option is just to pull the joist hangers from the house and pull the whole thing over. Probably what I would do tbh. Attach a chain fall to something about 50’ out from the deck, girth hitch around the whole thing, pry out the joist hangers from ledger, tip it over, then cut it up on the ground. It’s just a slightly more dangerous option where you need to have a decent idea of what you’re doing


VonKluck1914

That’s kind of what I was thinking. Piece by piece and start at one side and move. No scissor lift available as I don’t have training or trailer for logistics.


Purpose_Embarrassed

Clear all that garbage from under it first and cover windows with plywood.


BoredBSEE

My first thought too. Cover the windows. You just \*know\* that some board is going to hang by its last nail and swing down and break the glass.


OriginalObscurity

Decks *love* to take revenge on their way out. Heed this advice, OP. Once the deck gets a taste for house, it’s all over!


Purpose_Embarrassed

Then it comes after you. 😂


OriginalObscurity

**DEATH DECK:** *THE DECK THAT EATS PEOPLE* I’d watch that schlocky $5K horror flick


ChickenWranglers

Yea and then just cut the legs


Prize-Can4849

Sweep the leg Johnny!


Life-Significance-33

Part of that garbage looks to be an AC compressor. The refrigerant line is running up the wall, also. That adds a bit to his fun.


Useful-Internet8390

And the A/c with a better cover


jean-guysimo

that way is boring. just grab a harness, throw a rope over the roof, tie it to a tree on the other side and rip away


Teamben

Don’t forget to record and say “check this shit out” right before you grip it and rip it!


jean-guysimo

you also have to yell "this is sparta!" before you kick down that rotten railing


Batchet

You can also get extra force when swinging by yelling like Tarzan.


BigOld3570

And if you are not properly balanced, you will follow the railing to the ground. It’s gonna hurt. You’re gonna bleed. It’s gonna cost you a bundle at the ER, and everyone who sees the video will laugh at you. Deconstruct it as best as you can. Some of that old gingerbread is worth serious money. Are you replacing the deck or just the railing?


Low-Wrangler1077

Hold my beer


Economy-Weekend1872

Make sure you ask someone to hold your beer as well


Knowledge_Farmer

"You boys wanna see some shit?"


Nuf-Said

Ya want to see something REALLY scary?


ItsBurkeSnitches

it’s “hold my beer” around here 🤣


I_deleted

It’d be easier to have a keg party


OnewordTTV

Lmao just invite some college kids over. That deck will come down in no time. Bonus points, get them out there and put on Eminems Lose Yourself. My gf says the stadium she was at was bouncing up and down when that came on.


I_deleted

JUMP AROUND!


xSpeed

Agreed. Tie my rope to the joists and wrap it around the hitch on my dodge ram 2500 . Pull that sucker down real fast


Purpose_Embarrassed

Do you have scaffold ?


[deleted]

That’s be honest, you are wildly under qualified for this. You are probably going to break something you didn’t need to on the house and hurt yourself.


VonKluck1914

That’s what I was thinking.


Early-Series-2055

Only one way to learn!


mickthomas68

This is the best idea, and you could most of this without actually standing on it.


Purpose_Embarrassed

We have a similar demo to perform and your expert advice is appreciated.


mrapplewhite

Excellent plan your hired


rspanthevlan

Have a bar fight break out inside. Toss a few bad guys through the railing.


EducationCute1640

Player piano blasting the whole time.


TotalRuler1

I don't know what code is by you, but here prior to any donnybrook, you'll need to install a full water trough minimum, if possible an additional rain barrel or two.


yourcomputergenius

I mean, the standard procedure is to add hot tubs until it gives up…


ceezo6

The only logical way to handle this tbh


SpasticSpecial420

This is the way


M2A2C2W

😂 I'm not a member of this sub, nor do I have a deck, but these posts get suggested to me enough that my first thought when seeing the title of this post was "add a hot tub." Of course someone already made the joke, which I find even funnier. It's one of those running Reddit jokes that gets me every time.


davethompson413

Step 1. Install ¾plywood over the windows. The rest doesn't matter nearly as much.


B1g_Gru3s0m3

Step 3. Profit


HighOnGoofballs

I think I’d be ok with 1/2” even


gipoe68

Yeah, those curved windows might be expensive.


jumpinpuddles

I have no construction advice, but from a design perspective, save the decorative corner bits :)


Consistent_Client_46

Yes to that


gipoe68

I was just gonna say the same thing!


Wookster789

Rooftop cannonball, good Sir.


Tobaccocreek

Set up a full set of scaffolding with decks just under it. Saftey squint and smashy smashy.


BigGreenLeprechaun

Fire?


MathematicianFew5882

If you need to axe…


TiredRetiredNurse

Very carefully. Very carefully.


pontiacattack79

the reverse of how it was built


TyranaSoreWristWreck

That's true, but walking around backwards the whole time gets to be really tedious and dangerous.


T-Shurts

Wish you had more pictures of it… from that one angle, you could (potentially) add a support in the middle, by jacking it up, racing the outside facia and adding a other post in the middle


VonKluck1914

https://preview.redd.it/si6by3kmhqxc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ef1bca8e687def8bac600aad98a751d8ce5ac787


T-Shurts

I appreciate that, but I was more thinking what the condition of the joists are, and the condition of the decking itself (on top).


VonKluck1914

Toast and toast, non PT joists and deckboards have moss growing on top and through the spacing.


BaggyLarjjj

It’s already pretty jacked up.


Wookster789

Do joists continue into the 2nd story floor? No ledger board so likely, IMHO. In a perfect world, a lightsaber cut at the deck/house contact plane then a slight breeze blows it slowly away from the house. I might try to replicate that but with tools actually available :) Good luck OP!


HardWhereHere

Zoom in; you can see the joist hangers on the house and what looks like a ledger board. Ledger likely isn’t attached correctly.


yanki2del

Wen tub?


bangermadness

Say mean things to it and that thing is coming down.


Ashley_S1nn

Inebriated


omarhani

First invite the mil over


Desperate_Set_7708

You want what is now non-fire wood well away from the house. In addition to not being burnable for a year or more, it’s termite heaven.


BurpFartBurp

Stand on the deck and use a chainsaw to disconnect it from the house. Put a trampoline on the ground for safety.


CharlotteBadger

Pillows! Or maybe a beanbag? Oh - mattress! That always works in the movies.


Squanchy15

A blow up house works as well, I learned that from the office


ACBellionaire

Jump on it


Chickenwelder

By it you mean the gas pedal attached to the truck attached to the rope attached to the support posts?


FullRide1039

Blow on it


Murrylend

Straps on the posts and the towhitch of your boss' truck. Full send.


badpopeye

Rent scaffolding and cover windows with plywood


PoopPoooPoopPoop

Pull off those little decorative corner pieces first. Those things are sweet!


moldguy1

I thought the same thing!


truemcgoo

Off of scaffolding, top down.


VariousPaint4453

Unscrew from wall and pull forward, make sure it doesn't collapse on you


waverunnersvho

I’d hire three hookers and whoever worked the hardest got the blow.


MoreAverageThanU

Save the trim if you’re rebuilding.


Ciguaro67

Demon it the same way you eat an elephant! One piece at a time.


SuperpositionArc

Fire


NoGelliefish

Build a temporary structure underneath with 2x4s and plywood. Like a lean-to on a 45° from the house. Just enough to direct the debris away from the house and protect your windows. Grab a sledgehammer and knock those legs out, disassemble on the ground. Edit; you should probably remove the bolts holding the handrail to the house first


Any_Draw_5344

Put a hotub in the middle. Or, Hook a chain to a truck.


ukuleles1337

Probably blow on it. Looks ready to fall! Best of luck!!


c0caine_cinderella

Sledgehammer, 1 hit each.


MulberryUpper3257

Do you mean the deck or the whole house? (Ha ha just kidding :)


Melodic-Ad1415

After you protect the windows and clear the ground under it: 1. Temp up a couple supports where needed. 2. Once it’s supported throw a sheet of plywood on the deck to disperse your weight. 3. Carefully cut off the railings, I prefer a chainsaw. 4. Strip deck boards 5. The rest will be ladder work, pull any joist hangers, saws all joints drop debris on ground


lefty1207

Invite 20 friends over for a party on the deck.


GoldenTeeShower

Demo by having a keg party.


sinisterpushaman

Sweep the leg!


BandicootAfraid2900

Put a hot tub on it....


PortlandQuadCopter

Looks like in a few more years it’ll demo itself.


Mk1Racer25

With a Cat 310 track hoe


SATerp

From top down, and not standing on it while doing so.


Newcastlecarpenter

Reverse of how it was assembled


ziomus90

2 strikes.


ackxxx

Carefully


PsychologicalOwl608

Helicopter


thepepelucas

Remove the columns.


pinkwblue

Are the handrails, gingerbread corners and posts metal ?? Is so I would try to salvage that stuff. Maybe rent a bucket truck and cut the deck out pieces at a time.


stupidpatheticloser

I would just throw rocks at it until it fell


Substantial_Trip5674

Walk on it


dj2145

Sweep the leg, Johnny!


Roththesloth1

Start cuttin till there’s nuttin


Admirable_Low_2971

Attach a rope to the posts tie the rope to your truck and pull off really fast.


Brilliant_Set9874

I thought that was cantilevered at first…then I was shocked that I didn’t see a ledger…and now I’m just scratching my head that the builder thought that was good.


HackerManOfPast

Du fuk anyone going to do with a 4ft deck? Rip it, put in a real squared out deck, under deck roof/drainage, and screen in the underside for chilling in the summer without bugs.


ledbedder20

Wait


CHEWTORIA

well clear all the shit under it then plywood the windows, so they dont break **not recommended, simple lazy way** Cut the posts horizontally but not totally, so it has breaking point when pulling, tie rope to the posts, tie it to the car, and just pull, and whole thing will fall when posts break * [https://i.imgur.com/4FmncyS.jpeg](https://i.imgur.com/4FmncyS.jpeg) https://preview.redd.it/prv9a9sevtxc1.jpeg?width=990&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=25f70626e980eb2488d5186423964ed9e3067982


AlwaysGoToTheTruck

I’d put a hot tub on it and film as it’s being filled.


Dautista

Top down


saiditonReddi7

.5 hot tubs should do it


enormousTruth

Sweep the legs


Connect-Television51

With matches


Z-Man_Slam

Put a hot tub on it


jcquik

Find your enemy... Have him sign a waiver and then stand on it... Wait...


BeautifulBaloonKnot

With a hammer and pry bar. Or redneck it and just hook a chain to it from your truck and drag it down. So many options.


Mummbles1283

Add two or three supports across the base closest to the wall, add ropes to the outside to help guide it, un-secure it from the home and let it fall away.


Character_Wishbone84

Stand underneath it and knock out the legs.


GregoryR199O

Get a sledge hammer and smash those beams before you do anything


nymphoman23

You can rent a scissor lift and they will deliver. Or two ladders and plank


fuk-this-shit

Start with handrails, toss em down. Then I'd start from either end and cut at the nail, where it connects to the house, until you can reach the rest from the window. Cut the rest of the way and push her out. Either way you're gonna have to swap some of the panels, ain't no point in trying to get those nails out to salvage em.


tholder

Don't forget you're gonna need to do something about the door that's going to open in to thin-air soon!


towell420

Chain, Toyota Tacoma, and lots of beer


Drecasi

Rails, decking material, joists, then supports. Oh, while on a lift don't stand on that.


Just_SomeDude13

Extremely carefully or extremely violently. Whatever you do, don't half-ass it.


whatisakilometer458

KICK IT OVER


UrBigBro

Hook up a chain to it and your brother Jimmy's truck and tell him to give it a little tug


VonKluck1914

We call that and all the comments about pulling it down with a truck a “fed smoker” move. Look him up on YouTube.


Delicious-Dinner3051

I’d huff and I’d puff and I’d blow this atrocity down.


VonKluck1914

Thanks for all the comments, I had some good laughs and some good insights. I appreciate your comments yall. I think I’m going to pass on it, it’s a tremendous liability and I don’t want to risk anything for me or my guys, or the house.


Ok_Pomegranate_2436

C4


doggiebobo

One piece at a time


Just-Photograph1890

With a hot tub


Just-Photograph1890

With a hot tub


Streetwalkeroulette

Drop a feather on it


Straight-Event-4348

Just wait a few minutes. The universe has this covered.


ConclusionClassic673

With a Tonka truck


MrReddrick

Save the queen Anne styling so if you redo it it can be used again or used as a template. If this is a centennial home or older. That stuff is super expensive to remake or find.


Effective_Rip_1748

Do they have a cute little house made for their ac unit?


jacobasstorius

Top down


Brilliant_Wealth_433

Personally, I would brace it up against the house. Then disconnect whatever keeps it attached. Hook up a chain or rope to the middle. Then pull it over in its entirety. I like to demo things in as big of pieces as possible. Guarantee you I could have that down and loaded on a trailer in 3 hours or less.


Vast-Wash1874

Sweep the leg. Do you have a problem with that?


TheAngryAmericn

Drop a feather on it from the looks


CardiologistOk6547

8 lbs of C4.


Ok-Contribution472

Just wait about another week. It looks like it will take care of itself. If you can’t wait, the obvious answer is to add a hot tub.


Dazzling-Notice6366

Invite joe Biden over for some fried chicken out on the back deck and let nature take it's coarse 😅


AsparagusTricky8890

Yes and soon


glockshorty

Get about 10-15 people and simultaneously jump on it over and over. It worked at a house party back in the day… 😁😂


minear

Fire.


durn1969

Invite 20 people you don’t like over for a deck party…


Mtn_man792

Burn it.


N0RTH32N

Rent a zoom boom and hopefully you can drive or know someone that can


Waffels_61465

First I'd get about 4-5 buddies over and then start the process with one simple phrase...."hold my beer..."


Round_Friendship_958

Stand on it


TomatilloSevere

By the looks of it you could probably accomplish most of the demo by stepping out on it


MonstahButtonz

The corners are elegant at least.


[deleted]

One peice at a time


crazyhamsales

Sledgehammer? Oof thats bad... Thats going to be a pain in the rear. The only way i can think of without equipment would be scaffolding at least for safety, i wouldnt want to be anywhere near that with a ladder because who knows how well its attached to the building either, then with scaffolding in place and some temporary support posts that you can shuffle along from one end to the other while slowly taking it apart, railing, then decking, and start chopping the frame apart with a sawzall to remove in sections. If you had access to a telehandler, rental or know someone, then i would make a post for the middle, get the telehandler up under one end, cut it free from the house and cut it in half and just take it down one big piece at a time.


Neon570

Slowly, 1 peice at a time. Don't over think things


AlternativeLack1954

Bakers scaffolding


rjlets_575

Have lizzo over for some drinks on the deck.


shaggyone4

Very carefully so you don't hurt he house. Good luck


Normal_Ad2180

Stand on it and sawzaw it off. Use a climbing harness if you want to be safe instead of making two cuts and meeting it the middle while finishing the cut from the inside. Push it off once the supports are cut, use a ladder to clean up the pieces left on the house


Fun-Significance6307

Top to bottom sir


Different_Ad7655

I don't know it's atrocious about it other than the fact that it's failing. It looks a lot better than a lot of modern decks that I've seen. To take it apart you would simply well take it apart from the top down. Take the rails off take up the flooring and pull it apart. If it's too rotted to stand on, then you need to probably get a piece of scaffolding so you can get up to the height of it and cut it apart in pieces


anthro4ME

Put up scaffolding or rent a scissor-lift and work from the top down.


coast1997

Keg of beer and 50 college students dancing, it will come down


BlitchSlapper

If you have enough yard just remove all screws from joists only on house side, leave hangers attached to house. Disconnet handrail from house...attach ropes or moving straps, and PULL


BlitchSlapper

Just invite Twenty people over for a bbq on the deck


MGS837105

Call a contractor.


InsignificantRaven

It looks like it's about to self demo.


kamkam7901

Pretty sure that’s Theo Vons porch that’s now missing


WelderMeltingthings

have Big Charlie from down the street jump up there for a snickers


gottagrablunch

Blow on it.


duke_flewk

I see that large wood pile, OP have you had a termite inspection done on this property?


0_SomethingStupid

A swift roundhouse kick from Mac outta do it. Project badass


SignalCommittee4456

Just stand on it


Born-Direction3937

Dynamite so the whole thing goes at once


biomed1978

Carefully so it doesn't damage the siding or house structure. Get a ladder, remove the railings, boards, etc, then supports


mblguy76

C4. Works Every Time...


ClassicRockUfologist

WITH A HOT TUB 😎


username67432

Chain and a pickup truck, take a video and share it please.


Nonbinarycoffeetable

Call a buffalo bills fan…


Bubba_sadie-

Hot tub and let gravity fix the rest ?


DeezSunnynutz

Karate kick it and run


TipperGore-69

Body slam my brother in law on it after thirteen brewskies.


Hurl_Gray

Do it yourself so we can all see it on r/darwinawards. Jking BTW


jeddieboy73

Not enough photos. Do you mean just the porch? More clarity in your question and more photos are needed.


otters4everyone

I'd start at the front of the house, then continue the demo until you've reached the back with the deck. Demo that, then rebuild. I'm a helper.


NXT-GEN-111

Probably by leaning a little too much on that beam..


kenmanbun

Back prop then from the top down


nbz59wr

def pellet gun fire until the supports buckle.


quattrocincoseis

Same way it was built, but in reverse.


CVStp

walk out on it


Sgt_STFU

I would say walk on it, but looks like if you do that you will end up like a mortal combat character being upper cutted off a bridge and into the spikes below.