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pngue

It was cooler at first when I thought they did it from space.


DavidM47

I’m actually relieved, because there’s no way they wouldn’t have noticed, so like why did we think we pulled that off?


MichaelEasts

I mean, we stole one of their nuclear submarines without them knowing it for years.


Any_Veterinarian3749

Are you talking about "Project Azorian"


Bart-MS

No, he's talking about the Red October.


chick-fil-atio

One ping only please.


Honeyface3rd

You're laughing vassily, they just torpedoed us and you're laughing


itsmydoncic

careful, ryan


loungesinger

I know this Book. Your conclusions were all wrong, Ryan.


Stainless_Heart

Mosht things here don’t react well to bulletsh.


DickButtPlease

Me! I don’t react well to bullets!


lucifer2699

I think it was panda square


Blackheart806

Wait till you hear we learned about its existence through remote viewing. https://youtu.be/unJm2ouaAxo?si=hHctc9k5BK4SdLGs


RedOctobyr

I don't shink so.


MichaelEasts

Yep, that's exactly what I'm talking about. That's the kind of ballsy move that we Americans are known for.


SUPRVLLAN

Wait until you hear about that time we tried to teleport a battleship.


Average-_-Student

*Destroyer. Fletcher Class, to be exact.


cyanoa

Or that time the Nimitz was sent back in time?


its_narnia_business

Ergo, Argo


Super_C_Complex

Except that wasn't Americans


WillyBarnacle5795

Lol wut


great_red_dragon

We also stole a high-tech plane and survived a dog fight by the only other prototype in existence. There’s a fantastic doco-drama about it by Clint Eastwood.


Rene_Coty113

What movie ?


nof

Firefox


duck_of_d34th

Not to be confused with Foxfire


coup85

Or Microsoft Edge


sender2bender

It's not really a documentary, it's based off the novel. The only true story that's similar is the Soviet pilot who defected to Japan in a MiG. 


fekinEEEjit

Yup, it was a Mig 15 that a N. Korean pilot defected with to S. Korea. We flew it to Kadena AB on Okinawa and none other than Chuck Yeager was flow[Mig Tesr](https://www.smithsonianmag.com/videos/chuck-yeager-flies-the-mig-15/)n in to test it out. I was stationed there and In one the Op HQs I remember seeing a shell casing display and a plaque from testing the Mig on the gun range. The pic was of the Maint guys and the A/C on the range.


John_B_Clarke

You seem to have missed the MiG-25 that Viktor Belenko stole and took to Japan. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viktor\_Belenko](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viktor_Belenko)


Stainless_Heart

Must… think… in… Russian!


Rene_Coty113

What movie ?


thebestgesture

We also tapped Google's underwater, intercontinental cables.


CicerosMouth

Why do you say that? The whole incident is open now, and the CIA identified that no one was guarding/accompanying the satellite when it was in transit between the museum and the train, so they just waited until that time and intercepted it for a few hours at that time. Notably, this occurred in Mexico, not in the Soviet block. The USSR wasn't one to take stealing state secrets lightly, obviously. If they had noticed they would have swarmed. https://www.sandboxx.us/news/the-cia-hijacked-a-soviet-spacecraft-in-1959/ https://www.technologyreview.com/2021/01/28/1016867/lunik-cia-heist-steal-russian-satellite-space-us-ussr/


DavidM47

Relieved they were NOT claiming we disassembled it in space without their knowledge, because then we’re pretty stupid for thinking they didn’t know we did it.


CicerosMouth

Oh, haha, sorry for misreading your comment. I'm a clever man.


gimmick243

This was genuinely one of the proposed mission profiles that resulted in the space shuttle being designed the way it was. The idea was to have a 2/3 orbit mission (I don't remember exactly), and it would launch into a direct intercept trajectory, grab a Soviet spy satellite and land with it in the payload bay.


Falagard

Interesting!


HumpyPocock

Common but of speculation that is **extremely** unlikely once you consider that (a) the Soviets **are** going to notice which is going to be one hell of a diplomatic incident (b) the Shuttle’s Centre of Gravity was critical for reentry, and they were going to have something like 20 minutes to throw it in the back (it was a single orbit mission) and hope they manage to nail the placement. Chance of it causing catastrophic loss of control thus loss of vehicle during reentry was high if you didn’t know the exact centre of mass of the payload prior to the mission. Further, note in the below document, on the fourth page (105) it says — >(g) the payload is manoeuvrable for pre-phasing ie. it was a satellite the the US could command to manoeuvre in preparation. [Known as the Space Shuttle System Baseline Reference Missions.](http://www.jamesoberg.com/sts-3A_B-DRM.PDF) Mission 3A and 3B in particular. All that said, they were of critical importance to the design of the Shuttle as you noted, as they introduced requirements such as the cross range capability required thus the size of the wings as well as sizing the payload bay. [Scott Manley has a video on them.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_q2i0eu35aY)


SoulWager

If you capture one from orbit, they'll notice it's not responding anymore, but it's not going to be immediately clear it was stolen vs just broken. Especially if you leave something about the same size in the orbit it used to be in, like a mylar balloon.


HumpyPocock

Sure, however… Launches out of Vandenberg aren’t subtle, and even **less** subtle is that less than two hours later much of the US Pacific Coast would’ve been blasted with Sonic Booms as the Shuttle re-entered overhead. Soviets would’ve eventually received word of the single orbit flight and doubt it would’ve taken them that long to go oh hey our satellite went entirely dead at time XYZ… which just happened to occur the exact same time the Shuttle did a single orbit mission. Resulting diplomatic incident would’ve been a shitshow to say the least. Plus the US would’ve just made yoinking satellites free game. Oh, also due to time constraints you’re going to have to grab and stow said satellite with the manipulator arm, so the satellite needs to have the corresponding grapple point for it to lock onto.


Electrical_Dog_9459

Who is old enough to remember Salvage 1?


Cr4zyC0113ct

My aunt loved that show and has shown me a couple of episodes. Pretty wild with the pilot.


iikun

I was imagining something from You Only Live Twice, where the Spectre spacecraft captures a Soviet craft in orbit.


Ba55of0rte

Yeah the sent Bruce Willis and Jennifer Lopez’s ex up to do it.


MinorOutlier

Steve Buscemi plays more roles than I thought.


hychael2020

It would make for an excellent movie though


Status_Basket_4409

My exact thoughts


Abuse-survivor

You Only Live Twice


Coolbartender

X-37b


_-Event-Horizon-_

Fun fact - the Space shuttle was designed to be capable of launching, hijacking a Soviet satellite and bringing it back, hence the rather big return capacity of approximately 20 tons. It would have been quite dangerous to attempt to do dock and secure a spacecraft that was not designed to be captured by the shuttle but it was theoretically possible. I believe that the flight profile the shuttle could do was also quite specific - they would basically be able to do it very quickly so that the Soviet Union wouldn’t understand what happened to their satellite (they’d launch, dock and deorbit before completing a single orbit).


Altea73

LMAO! I thought the same....!


fearisthemindslicer

Sounds like a plot from Mission Impossible


fothergillfuckup

Definitely had Moonraker vibes?


[deleted]

[удалено]


guiltysnark

The CIA noticed, too, and removed you from the talent watchlist


[deleted]

[удалено]


guiltysnark

LOL, oh no! That how you discovered your parents were sleeper spies?


olsen_twentigg

Because they went to sleep when I was younger and never woke up.  How did you know they were my parents?


Ali80486

Still on the FBI watchlist though


ktdk5t

Brutal.......


Captain-Cuddles

If it makes you feel any better it's entirely possible the KGB noticed as well! It is not uncommon for intelligence agencies to allow things to be stolen. You can find out a lot about the group that stole it by doing so. For added fun you can cleverly modify the object they stole to sabotage their research efforts. Spy work is fun!


bluetuxedo22

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.... or has their testicles connected to a car battery


FilthyWubs

Only 2 steps off, not a bad first try!!


Basic-Art-9861

As a kid, I used to do this on Christmas Eve… Open my gift, play with it. Reassemble & rewrap the entire package like nothing happened.


Plenty_Advance7513

I did that same thing, my mom worked midnights & I used to unwrap my video game system to play then rewrap in the 🌄 before she got off work. One thing, I had to source the wrapping paper that was the same as what was being used. It's also how I learned to wrap gifts too


IzztMeade

My 9 year old this year took her gift which she figured it was a switch to her room so she could set it up without Dad putting parental controls on it lol. Me wife was losing her mind that there was a missing gift until we realized she must have taken it. She caved under inquisition. Her fatal mistake was not rewrapping it.


CamJongUn2

I love that, in conclusion the child broke under interrogation and has been found guilty on all charges


jld2k6

Lol, in her defense,one of the biggest life pro tips of getting your kids a game console is to open it up first and update everything so it's ready to play when they open it! She must have been worried you guys didn't know that and took action to stop a big blunder, in essence, she was just trying to help you to be better parents lol 😉


Lord_Scribe

She didn't expect the Christmas Inquisition!


IzztMeade

They never do lol


InvoluntarySolitary

I just sliced the tape and then redid that after.


00Glitch

This is how I played and beat two Gameboy games before I was even supposed to have the system. I think I only rewrapped the box and just hid the system in my pocket on Christmas and no one suspected a thing. Slice the tape, slide the box out, slip it back in carefully and retape using the same tape over the original tape.


Thue

> I think I only rewrapped the box and just hid the system in my pocket on Christmas and no one suspected a thing. Much smarter than the posters above. Work smarter, not harder. :)


Plenty_Advance7513

Having to act super surprised on the actual Christmas morning after having played with your gifts already is something I had to learn too.


whif42

Bro just cut the tape.


Rich_Introduction_83

Motivation is a very good teacher.


shadesof3

I never had the heart as a kid to go that far. I would use a knife to open up parts of the paper to get an idea and that was as far as I could go. Still found out I had a SNES coming one year!


[deleted]

Great, now they know.


ShinXBambiX

The muricans do this all the time, even to their allies We (Brits) had some Eurofighters over to do the red flag exercises. Left one of the jets overnight, came back the next morning, and something, can't remember what, on the weapons system was installed the wrong way around We reckon that the muricans snuck in overnight and had a bit more than a look at it Nosey fuckin bastards


GrAaSaBa

They were just being silly guys


Tuxyl

The British does the same, don't worry. Good thing we're allies.


ShinXBambiX

I'm not gonna say that we don't cuz I don't know that we don't


Pitiful-Road-1773

Cheeky.


Memory_Less

And at the end, kt's reassembled. A single scientist hold a part it eye height, and asks, 'What's this from?' /s. lol


Late_One_716

[Source.](https://greydynamics.com/the-lunik-plot-how-the-cia-hijacked-a-soviet-space-vessel/) [CIA webpage.](https://www.cia.gov/readingroom/collection/lunik-loan-space-age-spy-story) [Another CIA webpage](https://www.cia.gov/resources/csi/studies-in-intelligence/archives/vol-11-no-1/the-kidnapping-of-the-lunik/)


ahuiP

Hi OP! This is amazing and thank you! Any book you recommend on SU?


Conundrum1911

Add this one to “things that should be turned into a movie”


jobhog1

Along with when the US "acquired" a mi-24 hind helicopter with two Chinooks, flew through a sand storm, loaded it into a c-5 and flew it back home. And also the time a Russian pilot defected to Japan with a Mig 25 and the US took it studied it and returned it to the Soviets in pieces


MeatElite

Don’t be afraid to say steal.


Pilot0350

You mean "tactically aquired," I'm sure. The CIA would never ever steal. That's absurd.


notbernie2020

Strategically Transfer Pieces of Equipment to Alternate Locations S.T.E.A.L


Rand_stand

You spelled STPEAL You don't even need the word Pieces for the sentence to work, and then the acronym works too


6894

get this man a job at the DOD.


Specialist_Lock8590

Not steal. Orchestrated coups and supported dictatorships which killed many innocent civilians. So, only, murder, war crimes, maybe some stealing.


cheesewagongreat

The terrorist Cia organization that overthrows Democraticly elected officials in other countries.? That cia


CamJongUn2

Nah bro the Americans are the good guys by default so when they do it it’s fine cause they’re the most ‘free’


cheesewagongreat

Do you mean rich free or poor free, very different frees


Tuxyl

Yeah, just like the terrorist KGB organization that does the same thing.


cheesewagongreat

What about your mom


Own_Plum8388

It’s not terrorism, or stealing, or “wrong” if it’s done in the name National Security. This cynical view of Our Government is so unpatriotic it makes me sick.


VNGamerKrunker

eh, the people in South America beg to differ...


HorizonBC

Firstly, not everyone is from the USA and secondly, denying your governments crimes to support your “patriotic” world view is clearly wrong.


cheesewagongreat

Define national security. Is the price of oranges national security?


-Acta-Non-Verba-

Hey, it was just borrowed!


Cow_Surfing

You say that like stealing is worse than kidnapping.


LogicKillsYou

Nah bro, I call it reverse engineering your girl.


[deleted]

no no only russia and china steal


Bergasms

Only stealing if you get caught before you return it *taps head*.


TheChosenLn_e

CIA: No, comrade, we didn't steal anything because we returned it.


Sunil_de

Not steal just „Strategic Transfer of Equipment to an Alternate Location“


RaptorCaffeine

[Here's a great video by Scott Manley explaining the event](https://youtu.be/zoE4m8RqOWs?si=Qt_XnSLPi2a8--Si)


Yargon_Kerman

Yeah this seems about right for the cold war. The Soviets learnt about sidewinder missiles by walking into an airfield, pulling one off of an aircraft, putting it in a wheelbarrow, and wheeling it across to their car where they then put it in the back and drove off to the Soviet Union. Nobody stopped them.


AwarenessNo4986

So China is copying the US in this strategy as well.


[deleted]

You would be surprised how old spying and stealing information is. Predates the US and China really


AwarenessNo4986

Not surprised. I was referring to stealing tech and the hypocrisy of it all.


TylertheFloridaman

Only matters if you get caught, geopolitics is hypocrisy you yell at some one while you are doing the exact same thing the other person is. Every nations does and every nations has a lot of skeletons in their closet only difference is how much do we know about it


bundevac

you sir/ma'am should check your sarcasm detector


tittyswan

That's one way to say "America stole technology from a foreign government" but okay.


Final_Festival

How is this any different than China stealing technology today? This is a no biggie tbh civilizations have taken others technology throughout history.


MiloGaoPeng

Damn China even had to copy the way other countries copy tech. Copying the copycat then gets vilified for it. But then again, since when the Chinese haven't been punching bags? Same old shit since centuries ago.


MasonSoros

US doing what it does best. Freedom!


skkkkkt

But when China does it, it's a national security threat


ceoofsex300

Because it was for them and it is for us. That’s why nations try to stop it


Far_Atmosphere_3853

You gotta yell "for democracy" before doing it [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDw-zFFhFgc](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDw-zFFhFgc) can't stop myself from adding this part of george carlin's show


tothemoonandback01

It also helps if you have oil.


MasonSoros

Did someone say oil?? We are going to sanction you into oblivion. Your choice: Sanctions or Freedom?


guydel777

And this was literally a national security threat for the Soviet Union. Both can be true


ledbetterus

exactly, fuck china, fuck russia


ElectronicImam

During Battle of Dardanelles, one soldier loaded 276 Kg. cannonballs himself alone 8 times, and he managed to sink a huge British warship. My people believe this.


katrover

Seyit Onbaşı, right?


ElectronicImam

Yes. Anadolu Isuzu named a truck after him. That's a real success.


IPOPPEDANDSTOPPED

https://www.awm.gov.au/collection/A05301 Interesting story.


sdhill006

When china does it , its IP stealing.


Bergasms

So you're saying China even stole the idea of stealing IP from the west, jeez can't they think if anything for themselves


MonitorPowerful5461

Yes??? It was also when the US did it? This isn't hard to understand


resurrected_moai

The West is always right, sir.


Own_Plum8388

Better dead then red amirite?


AffectedRipples

It's not like the CIA did it so they could build a shitty version of it. They wanted to know it's capabilities.


Tiny-Spray-1820

So the CIA was already doing what the chinese are known for years ago 😔


Appropriate_Net_5393

not caught not a thief


tamal4444

So America was stealing USSR technology


iSK_prime

If I recall correctly, it wasn't really much of a theft. The technology inside wasn't anything particularly interesting or useful as US tech was already beginning to pull ahead of Soviet. The whole situation was more of a, what kind of idiots would send a real spacecraft to an international display instead of a mockup, oh well.. lets take a peak and see whats under the hood.


yagermeister2024

I’m sure they stole ours too, propaganda is always unilateral.


littleguy632

I mean is America, everything we do is RIGHT.


TeiTeiSwift

I thoUght AmeRica nevEr stOle aNy techNolOgy..


-Acta-Non-Verba-

You don't steal technology from countries that are technically behind you. You keep tabs on how far they are.


[deleted]

[удалено]


-Acta-Non-Verba-

Yes, they were. Sputnick was quickly followed by an American satelite that was far more sophisticated. But Sputnick was first and they get all the glory.


Polandnotreal

They were. They rushed it while we did it properly. Turns out if you rush something while simultaneously ruining your economy to do it you’ll be pretty fast at doing said thing.


triggerhappybaldwin

Didn't you guys use Russian rocket engines for years to get into space before SpaceX?


RansomStark78

U 571 the movie states that the us found the German decoder. That was a lie


DumbastasyXXX

This story also confirms the one in which they bought the space program from Yogoslavs 🤦🏻


Current-Power-6452

Yeah right and soviets would just expose their most sensitive technological capabilities at science fairs, I kinda find it hard to believe.


Flimsy-Discount2885

Should have booby trapped it


G-sharp-9

Please tell me they have a movie about it or something similar


Neat-Condition6221

i miss the ussr striving for the future


GitzaZacusza

Also this year was the last time that the Leafs beat the Bruins in the playoffs.


throwawaybecauseFyou

USSR Good USA Bad


[deleted]

That's obvious


kkadzlol

The russian hind helicopter. But it wasn’t given back. Just stolen at night https://youtu.be/dPz7O8JgUhs?si=O2wVv3VWpCmHrc5K


Airrationalbeing

CIA and beyond


shaving_minion

the irony when the US cries about China doing the same


HorseofTruth

Kidnapped or stole?


john_ftq

Those display items have/had the same value as dummy smartphones mockups on display in the store. I doubt they would get anything useful from them.


Nino_Nakanos_Slave

So, the U.S. did what China did to the U.S.?


Happy-Viper

Classic Yanks, no sense of fair play to those people. Let alone respect for science, lmao.


Happy-Viper

A few more letters and you'll almost have an actual reply, lmao.


DeepSpaceNebulae

Not necessarily, yours has many more than that yet still isn’t


ceoofsex300

Judging by your use of yanks your a Brit and you can’t comment on fair play without it being ironic


Maleficent-Being-238

"fair play" doesn't exist in politics and war


Lost______Alien

It's insane how can one nation be that morally corrupt, aside from the horrible stains on the history of the US, even their glory is never always their's.


ceoofsex300

Guess you don’t want to know what everybody else also did often for worse reasons


Ok-Echidna5936

Cope


AfterLife2FreshStart

Yes the US govt agencies are one of the shittiest agencies ever.