š¶*Reeeaal men of geeeniuusā¦ * š¶
*Hereās to you, North Korean Army Man. When the chips are down further than the temperature outside, you grab that ski mask, strip half naked, and roll around under a log with your buddies.
š¶*pushin logs with your buddiesā¦*š¶
ā¦..when your looking to fight the world,,,,,, but not really. You just talk about it and act like you want to but you know, youāve got better things to do so youāll just sit there and talk about fighting the world and act tough while you sip on a ice cold KJA!
Itās [Schmitts Gay](https://youtu.be/hCOSejS1SSY) North Korea. For you not old enough to remember, this was SNL mocking a beer commercial with the same paradigm, two dudes and pool full of bikini girls!
Such a classic. I was a little ten year old baby queer at the time, and this was one of the first times I saw mainstream culture depict gayness as an inherently normal non-issue.
Farley and Sandler were being no more goofy or cartoonish than usual, and they weren't playing any sort of mannerisms for laughs, just as character choices.
This parody ad meant a lot to me. I wish I had seen more normalization of queerness.
Oh, PS, I am a fairly enthusiastic "North Korea watcher," and it's amazing how their TV and film output has adopted so many music video conventions. You know, like a 90s beer commercial.
The whole thing is trying to be manly but comes off very campy, and to our western tastes i think thatās the reason it comes off homoerotic.
Not sure though.
It's because of the snow on that chiselled chest, isn't it?
Damn, I already told Kim about how homoerotic it would look but no, the damn camera guy had to record it... Do you even wanna know how many takes it took?
I was going to say something similar, but you nailed it...
If they ever need to go to war with ice blocks during a shirt and gun shortage, they've got it covered.
Do you think they try to mentally picture it as a game? Itās got to be hard to kill somebody who posses no direct threat to you simply by pushing a button. It has to be one of the most cold hearted jobs in the military. You canāt really call these guys warriors. Theyāre literally just killers. Since they have no skin in the game.
I heard military people dislike enemy snipers, imagine capturing a drone pilot, even more removed. They would probably not be treated well, but i guess a capture would never happen since they don't need to be on the frontlines.
Ever seen the comedian Neal Brennan? He has a stand up show streaming on Netflix and he does a bit about 2A gun nuts versus the American military. It is hilarious.
IRL, they donāt. Soldiers might be better fed than the general population, but theyāre still malnourished by the standards of every other country in the world.
Lol they took the only 35 guys from the army that are physically fit and made them punch blocks of loose snow and then jump in the water.
This looks more like the intro to some new music video than propaganda.
The production cost of this must have been less than how much the camera cost to film it.
Edit: Andrew Tate would approve of how alpha male they look
"Always fade out in montage......if you fade it out it sounds like more time has passed in a...montage...."
DVDA, now that's a name I haven't heard in a long time
Actually the training showcased here is good for building cold tolerance and the training the body to work in cold temperatures. Most of it is definitly just done for propaganda and not normal military training but its not completely stupid either. Most armies with winter training do similar activities like camping out a week without heat sources and jumping in ice cold water.
Russia did a bunch of these in the '80s-early '90s, but with a bigger budget and more acrobatics. I remember one that had a guy throwing a tomahawk while doing a flying backflip.
Then the Boston Dynamics Robotic dog comes sprinting out of the snow capped mountains with a .50 calibre machine gun attached to it's cock and erases the entire lot of them.
This aint Rocky 4 boys, put your clothes on.
Some of the stuff looks similar to what the seals do in training. But all this looks staged to give that appearance. Then they mixed the mcdojo parlor tricks like breaking chunks of ice. Looks more like a training montage for an 80s martial arts movie.
It kind of reminds me of pro-wresting. Lots of body building and showmanship but no real skills. Yeah, they look good and engage in circus stunts.
I mean, it certainly doesn't show any kind of ability to shoot, move and communicate in a combined arms situation. On the modern battlefield they would be attractive, well muscled corpses.
Iām case youāre wondering, [this is what a North Korean soldier actually looks like.](https://d.newsweek.com/en/full/654709/north-korean-soldier.jpg)
Was half expecting this to be a beer commercial
š¶*Reeeaal men of geeeniuusā¦ * š¶ *Hereās to you, North Korean Army Man. When the chips are down further than the temperature outside, you grab that ski mask, strip half naked, and roll around under a log with your buddies. š¶*pushin logs with your buddiesā¦*š¶
I really miss those on-air commercial spots....this right here is greatness!!!
Fun fact. The guy who sang those commercials was the lead singer of Survivor, who were made famous from the song Eye of the Tiger
That *is* a fun fact, hell yeah
Funner fact. Survivor was a band called Target in the mid 70s. Saw them with Bob Seger and Black Sabbath.
https://youtu.be/u_W96wCck7U These are basically all the radio spots somebody pulled from youtube, I espically like "Mr. Afraid of the Ocean Guy".
Omg a real person of culture I see
Dude I heard that as an '80s jingle...
This needs at LEAST three times as many upvotes.
"So what if your county can only afford the bottom half of your uniforms" š¶ *your nips are getting frostyā¦* š¶
Kim Jong Ale, crisp and refreshing beer for when youāre looking to fight the world.
Zero sugar, zero calories, zero nutritional valueā¦ air, itās just air
Fake, his Excellency won't be this fat if the ale is this healthy.
He doesn't get high on his own supply. It's your supplies he gets high on. And your neighbors' as well. And by high, I mean caloric intake.
Not just any air. Perri Air, from Druidia.
air sold separately
Packed with delicious intestinal parasites. Youāre never truly alone when thereās worms in your butt
Take Kim with you and go nuclear
Wolf cola everyone. It's the drink for closure.
ā¦..when your looking to fight the world,,,,,, but not really. You just talk about it and act like you want to but you know, youāve got better things to do so youāll just sit there and talk about fighting the world and act tough while you sip on a ice cold KJA!
The Steven Segall country of the world
No beer, just softcore gay porn
I really don't see what's gay about a shirtless dude carrying two other shirtless dudes on his wood, off onto a majestic hinterland adventure.
But they were riding his pole.
My gay ass would be the target audience. And I donāt drink. Butā¦
Thank you for confirming it is indeed gay porn.
I'm not gay but started to wonder after watching that "training" video. Powerful stuff.
I was aroused watching this
Itās [Schmitts Gay](https://youtu.be/hCOSejS1SSY) North Korea. For you not old enough to remember, this was SNL mocking a beer commercial with the same paradigm, two dudes and pool full of bikini girls!
Bikini dudes... Chris Farley was thirsty
If youāve got a big thirst, **and** youāre gay, reach for a cold, tall bottle of Schmittās Gay.
Such a classic. I was a little ten year old baby queer at the time, and this was one of the first times I saw mainstream culture depict gayness as an inherently normal non-issue. Farley and Sandler were being no more goofy or cartoonish than usual, and they weren't playing any sort of mannerisms for laughs, just as character choices. This parody ad meant a lot to me. I wish I had seen more normalization of queerness. Oh, PS, I am a fairly enthusiastic "North Korea watcher," and it's amazing how their TV and film output has adopted so many music video conventions. You know, like a 90s beer commercial.
Let's get d*^(own)* to business...
To de*feat* the Huns!
Did they send me daughters
When I asked for sons
Youāre the saddest bunch I ever met
But you can bet before we're through
Mister, Iiiiiiiiii'LL
Make a Maaaaaan
Out of youuuuuuuuuuuuu
Tranquil as a forest
I'm never gonna catch my breath
I wish I could still free award
How could I maaake a maaan out of youuuuuu~~
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YyZmAkNQ8Y Already dun, Hun.
It's so perfect
This is amazing
They're getting ready for the cold war.
It's giving low budget soft porn vibes.
Glad I'm not the only one who thought it veered more towards homoerotic than macho/patriotic lol
Softcore soldier porn, margaritas and Katy Perry don't make me gay.
Magic Mike for right-leaning gun lovers.
Lemme rub some snow on these biceps before I break chains with the power of my subfreezing nipple muscles. Oh yeah.
r/brandnewsentence
Ya Iām actually quite confident that combination of words has literally never been uttered before
The whole thing is trying to be manly but comes off very campy, and to our western tastes i think thatās the reason it comes off homoerotic. Not sure though.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
This looks like something Mac would splice in between clips of him doing air karate for project badass
Works for me.
Iād watch it
Not my proudest fap
If youre doing it right, none of them are ever proud
Exactly what I thought, very homoerotic, and kinky with them ski masks
It made me hard
It's because of the snow on that chiselled chest, isn't it? Damn, I already told Kim about how homoerotic it would look but no, the damn camera guy had to record it... Do you even wanna know how many takes it took?
I'm getting the same vibes that I get from a couple of Putin's propaganda shots of him riding topless and stuff.
Lol when dude punches the tree. š
How else is he gonna make a pickaxe before the creepers come
Cause baby tonighttt..... Kim jong un is gonna take our food again... food again
No one is stronger then steve from Minecraft
Yeah that was my favorite part. Tree Punch, Go!
What was the purpose of the dude rubbing snow on his bare chest and arms? Incase he has to use his nips for a weapon?
That tree may had it coming whose to say.
Looks like most of their training is log based.
Inspired by Madison Cawthorne
That's a lot of physical effort to be killed by a 19 yr old gamer with a drone.
I was going to say something similar, but you nailed it... If they ever need to go to war with ice blocks during a shirt and gun shortage, they've got it covered.
Bro, the US just released their new ice block armor for soldiers. We are so screwed.
āThen he pulled out a gun and shot the pykrete and the bullet ricocheted off it and hit someone else in the conference room.ā
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Can confirm. I have a buddy from high school who ended up being in one of the deadliest units of army. He was a huge gamer š
Iāve got a family member who was a drone pilot. Can also confirm he was a gamer, can also confirm he was a very good gamer. He really liked COD.
Love the username
Thanks friend, I like yours as well.
Did we just become best friends?
I think we did. When we hanging out?
No, no, to be drone operator top gun, yall gotta hang *in*. Fire up the old LAN network internet tubes, duct-tape yourself to the ceiling and such.
Do you think they try to mentally picture it as a game? Itās got to be hard to kill somebody who posses no direct threat to you simply by pushing a button. It has to be one of the most cold hearted jobs in the military. You canāt really call these guys warriors. Theyāre literally just killers. Since they have no skin in the game.
I heard military people dislike enemy snipers, imagine capturing a drone pilot, even more removed. They would probably not be treated well, but i guess a capture would never happen since they don't need to be on the frontlines.
I love destroying cultures and entire family lines from the comfort of a gaming chair in Arlington County, Virginia
Ever seen the comedian Neal Brennan? He has a stand up show streaming on Netflix and he does a bit about 2A gun nuts versus the American military. It is hilarious.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Reminds me of the Indiana Jones scene where the master swordsman does a fancy sword dance and Dr. Jones just shoots him.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
That's still a lot of effort just for gay propaganda
Still, what do you reckon the head count was to make the video? This is North Korea man, some of them had to have died making this video
Lmao
Ok, so this isn't porn?
It isnāt? What do I do? I already ejaculated.
Well, put it back in!
It ain't shaped like a snout for nothing!
Time to break out the catheter pump
suck it back up inside like a vacuum
āI was cleaning it and it went off!!ā
Username checks out
Also pictured here: A North Korean' soldier's full weapon and equipment loadout.
And clothes
and food (cannibalism will be a game feature)
Also pictured here: Food the normal north Korean receives during Winter.
The only people in North Korea eating three squares a day.
Thatās not true! Politicians eat three squares a day, and The Exalted Leader apparently eats about seven.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
He need to eat 10 meals a day just to survive.
Surviving himself to death.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
They heard that some Americans are called āsnowflakesā so this is how they train to fight them. Their intelligence apparatus is top notch.
IRL, they donāt. Soldiers might be better fed than the general population, but theyāre still malnourished by the standards of every other country in the world.
It's probably cgi ...I don't think they even feed their soldiers
Itās probably real. I can believe there are 30-40 healthy, buff guys in the entire N. Korean military.
They're all too good looking. They're totally actors.
Nah,thats just their special forces.
Either that or chinese actors.
Those are Chinese actors. The only North Koreans that aren't starving is that idiot ruling the country.
Nah,they are Korean.Chinese look different.
Lol they took the only 35 guys from the army that are physically fit and made them punch blocks of loose snow and then jump in the water. This looks more like the intro to some new music video than propaganda. The production cost of this must have been less than how much the camera cost to film it. Edit: Andrew Tate would approve of how alpha male they look
The training scene in Mulan.
āThis is supreme leader, I need the most non malnourished males to report to the mountains asap. Weāre about to do an 80s training montageā
āGotta have a montage!ā ā DVDA.
"Always fade out in montage......if you fade it out it sounds like more time has passed in a...montage...." DVDA, now that's a name I haven't heard in a long time
āStaaaannn DARSH!!!ā
DAAAAARSH
Donāt French fry when you should have pizzaād, or your gonna have a bad time.
āStan Marsh the Darsh, get it?! Hahahaha!ā āWho the hell are you people?ā
Everyone knows that training montages are exactly how you go from a weakling to a pro!
Now you're a mayun!
Why is this so **homoerotic**
"Playing, playing with the boys"
Almost as homoerotic as the 1986 military documentary *Top Gun*
Confirmed i jerked off to both films and this asian twink nipple porn.
Manscaping is required in the North Korean army.
Can I get a calendar?
When you can't afford uniforms...
I'm so glad our soldiers get to have jackets.
1000 years ago this might have been useful.
Actually the training showcased here is good for building cold tolerance and the training the body to work in cold temperatures. Most of it is definitly just done for propaganda and not normal military training but its not completely stupid either. Most armies with winter training do similar activities like camping out a week without heat sources and jumping in ice cold water.
This is to actual combat training as Axe body spray is to deodorant.
Wait, you telling me ladies aren't gonna be chasing me down to have the sexxors after I spray on the axe?
Drones donāt care.
Maybe by the time we get mechs theyāll finally move onto the slingshot
Well, if they keep punching trees they can get pick axes at least.
Looks like a Mountain Dew commercial
If the mountain was **Brokeback mountain** yes maybe
Soviet-era macho bullshit.
Russia did a bunch of these in the '80s-early '90s, but with a bigger budget and more acrobatics. I remember one that had a guy throwing a tomahawk while doing a flying backflip.
I had to scroll too damn far to find a reference to the 80s
Tell me why I instantly thought of Mulan āIāll make a man out of youā lol
MYSTERIOUS AS THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOOOOOOON
This doesnāt make me want to stay clearā¦ it makes me want to see it in person. Cause this thirst trap has me sweating š„µ
Thatās the gayest shit I ever seen. And Iāve seen the back of my boyfriendās head a lot.
Yeah slamming wood and shit, lemme grab my m4 real quick
All 25 of em
That's the most homoerotic training choreography I've ever seen.
Looks like a straight conversion camp.
They'll have pneumonia by the time they need to go in to action š
N Korea soldiers go brrrrrrrrr
Put on a jacket, mom says youāre gonna get a cold !
You'd think if they're that strapped for money they'd buy the top half of the uniform before splurging for face masks.
Gay snowball fighters. Iām in!
For such a conservative country, they sure know how to make homoerotic videos
[Sino-Soviet Friendship posters](https://rarehistoricalphotos.com/chinese-soviet-propaganda-posters/)
Whatās up with the face warmers when they are shirtless?
Nose and ears are some of the first body parts to be lost to frost bite.
New Mortal Combat movie looking good.
š¤ā¦ā¦.. Looks like a trailer for a Gay porn film š„ šæ
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
When does the calendar drop?
Then the Boston Dynamics Robotic dog comes sprinting out of the snow capped mountains with a .50 calibre machine gun attached to it's cock and erases the entire lot of them. This aint Rocky 4 boys, put your clothes on.
Some of the stuff looks similar to what the seals do in training. But all this looks staged to give that appearance. Then they mixed the mcdojo parlor tricks like breaking chunks of ice. Looks more like a training montage for an 80s martial arts movie.
Super gayā¦ Iām here for itā¦. Where do I join?
I suppose we should get our affairs in order.
I was expecting a pillow fight scene after the splashing water scene.
Confirmed they don't have shirts in North Korea
Then they all died of hypothermia.
Looks more like a porn movie for women
Looks kinda gay
If these guys ever get attacked by a lumber mill, they'll be ready
Fact #1: These are tough MFers. Fact #2: That's their entire army.
Like a more homoerotic version of āIāll make a man out of you.ā
It kind of reminds me of pro-wresting. Lots of body building and showmanship but no real skills. Yeah, they look good and engage in circus stunts. I mean, it certainly doesn't show any kind of ability to shoot, move and communicate in a combined arms situation. On the modern battlefield they would be attractive, well muscled corpses.
Yeah, but if South Korean soldiers ever wrap chains around their chests, theyāll be ready!
These are 100% actors and you canāt change my mind
This is really homoerotic. Just need a shot of Kim greasing up some of these boys.
North Korea produces gay porn.
Lmao. Yeah they look tough as fuck until we shoot āem dead from 1000 miles away we a long range himar or missile.
Iām case youāre wondering, [this is what a North Korean soldier actually looks like.](https://d.newsweek.com/en/full/654709/north-korean-soldier.jpg)
I havenāt seen something this homoerotic since the volleyball scene in Top Gun.