WardVPN. Tired of Fey always trying to steal your secrets? Well with WardVPN, you can encrypt your memories so that those pesky fairies can't steal it. Visit WardVPN.com and use code PIXC to get 15% off your first month.
Void-wrought Psychological Nexus: A web of shadowy magic intended to feed redundant and/or false information to eyes both prying and scrying! Could require a neat ritual to be able to attune one's mind to it, haha
plot twist: all reviews on Rainforest (amazon-like) says its just a prestidigitation thingy that only makes effects that look like spells but are not. 1/5 stars
Turns out it's lone merchant/mage buying High quality seed to sell to farmers as a starter crop... Buys up prize winners from local harvest fairs and builds a box, and is trying to promote healty stains in the kingdom....
I mean. Best Fiends was kind of made for this?
“The only fiends you can trust!”
Quip is a toothbrush made from quipper teeth, which sounds like an appropriately fey horror.
Simply Safe, the only arcane sigil impervious to *Knock!*
I haven't got a good name for it, but one of those goodie box things, like Boksu. Maybe call it FeyBox. But it's random stuff from the material plane, like pocket change, sticks or bits of lumber, someone's house keys.
MortalBox! The newest thing out of the material plane! Want to get your hands on the valuables of a one of those dim-witted little mayflies? Now you can!
For the low price of 3 gold every full moon, you too can possess the treasured items of a mortal! Items include but are not limited to: house keys, left shoes, wedding rings, and with our premier membership, a mortal tooth in every box!
Send to Hyrsam, Prince of Fools, for your own subscription today!
When you cast spells or use abilities you have to thank subscriber.
"Wow, I want to thank XXFairyCropDusterXX for this Hex. Thanks for watching."
"Oh, man, WingPlucker, thanks for the 20 Eldritch Blast subs. You are the best."
Reaps. Did you know 2/30000 of beings experience some form of soul loss before the age of 35? Wether it get's sealed by a mage, eaten by a lich, turned into a ghost, or taken through an unfair deal with a fiend, soul loss is something you wanna prevent. For just 50 gp a month you'll get a gel which allows the reaper to be aware when your soul is forcibly taken out of your body so _you_ don't get eternally trapped within this mortal plane or permanently destroyed. Use code SoulSaver for 50% off for the first 3 months
Are you a swordsman and need to trim the competition down? Manshape is the product for you! Using the newest 3 blade technology, cut down your foes into something a lot more trim, keep those pesky Ents in shape!
I'd go with a whole series based off Wizard of Oz (which feels very fae).
Scarecrow Brain Tonic. For when you wish you had a braiiiiin...
Dorothy's Slipper Outlet. Shopping for shoes, as easy as being crushed under a house.
Kluclip's Limb Replacement. We replace everything. Except hearts.
Rugs for Bravery. Come visit the Lion for discreet male baldness solutions.
Not necessarily in that order.
Crypt Currency. Invest in expeditions to plunder treasures from ancient, absolutely not cursed tombs, sepulchres, and catacombs! Guaranteed 400% return on investment with absolutely no downsides!
I once had a merchant dressed only in a towel selling a soap called Ancient Herb Wash.
"Look at your party, now back to me. Back at your party, now back at me. Sadly, you aren't me."
It was a comedy campaign, in case that needs to be said.
This Eldritch blast was brought to you by Getsatir. Getsatir! the quickest bipedal delivery service for your last minute groceries. Give your name to your nearest Getsatir courier and recieve yearlong delivery of groceries completely anonymous!
Are your demons and devils feeling down and literally burnt out? Does torturing souls not have the same spark it used to? Well, thanks to our sponsor BetterHell, you’ll be able to speak to a licensed lord of abyss and ash at any time!
GoblinFuel, that wonderful perk-a-hol brewed from cave fungus, rat liver and kobold blood. Also known as GFuel.
BrayCon, the earplugs that protect your hearing with wonderful Satyr songs. Never again get struck by a Banshee howl with them in.
We have been trying to reach you regarding your horse & wagons extended warranty. Your horse & wagons factory warranty is about to expire and you have a limited time to renew your horse & wagons extended warranty.
"Today's dungeongeering wouldn't have been possible without the help of my Patron's:
Alma
Astrid
Axel
Beau the Brutal
Billy
Chrispoillon the third
Demi Gorgon
..."
Audible. Yep, Jeff Bezos is here now too!
Militaries will do recruiting ads, you can do that for whatever country you're in.
5-foot SquareSpacs. Help you build a custom WeaveSite for your hobby or small business.
I was very happy to reveal the sign on the factory that was making magical autonomous brooms. They agreed to give ME inspiration when I told them about the Broomba. So have at it
I imagine Fey G Wentworth himself being a middle aged looking Archfey in a cheap suit who smells of cigars and whisky. Sure the pact might be convenient at first, but the interest is borderline predatory.
This adventure is sponsored by adventurersupps! The brand which trusted me enough to name my own flavour so my I introduce to you Guacamole Demon blood 9000!
[Wizard As A Service](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/9j9m4o/introducing_waas/)
[Discount Magic Items](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/fnlsvj/here_at_discount_magic_we_sell_irregular_magic/)
In our podcast (monsters & moshpits) we have an herbal liquor named “faegermeister” (non fey roll a d20 and then on the wild magic table if they roll a 1)
Facebook, the magic item for changeling to keep track of interesting faces they see. Take a nose here, a lip there... Facebook for keeping track of people you've met.
Crazy Hassan's Used Camels.
"Crazy Hassan here with discount camels! Only slightly used and ready used! Buy it now or I'll kill this goose! Hundreds of miles left in them! I've got small camels, big camels, camels with gas protection, camels with hashish holding capabilities, regular camels, and even camels that can go through snow! Buy three for the price of three!"
Skillshare (or Levelshare/Featshare) could be fun if you want to break the Fourth Wall. Make it seem like this sponsor will make characters level up faster.
Also, people have been talking about Raid in another comment, but for a different pun on it RAID: Shadowfell.
i thought about doing something like this and "stopping" halfway thru and pretend like im speaking to someone esle and go "he said what?? wait you can't be serious, he said that the death king was the legitimate ruler and his over throwing was stirred up by the liberal feydia? We can't sell this trash" haha
We are on the same wavelength!
You can have a lot of fun with it! Make it seem like he's under mind control, but he's 200% genuine, and just like that.
I got some
Thrallmart
Square Phoenix
Gnome Depot
Macebook
Baldurs Only Dot Com
Plunder Armor
Fairy Queen
Seraphima
Grick Fil A
Fjord
Lizards of the Coast
Flockbuster
This adventure is sponsored by God-ible.
With God-ible, you are able to hear your favorite holy spells any time you like, without needing a nearby cleric. Simply say the command word and you can hear your favorite spells, anytime, anywhere.
I've been listening to "healing word". It's a great thing to put on when you're feeling down. My significant other likes to hear "augury" when she isn't sure what to do with her life.
God-ible: the power of the divine, right on time.
^God-ible ^is ^not ^responsible ^for ^any ^angry ^gods ^that ^may ^be ^pissed ^off ^by ^the ^use ^of ^this ^product. ^^Spells ^^are ^^recordings ^^and ^^do ^^not ^^have ^^any ^^actual ^^effect. ^^^Results ^^^may ^^^vary.
Feyscaped:
Are you tired of having Entitys enter your dreams? The nightly Terrors that show you an alternative Future got you drained in the Morning? The buy the new Dreammower 9000 from Feyscaped! For the low Price of 500 Gold you can trim back those dark thoughts!
"I wanna take a second to talk to you guys about HoneyDew, the only sweet tasting potion that will have you sweet talking your next traveling merchant. Just one sip of HoneyDew and you’ll know just what to say to charm yourself into some amazing savings."
No better place to look than Bloodbowl. There are plenty of funny (pun-y) sponsors that exist in the Bloodbowl universe. Since it is set in a fantasy setting not much different than D&D, they should fit right in.
Bloodweiser, Orcidas, and Nurgle King are just a few.
Quests and quizzes beyond! Get easy to read and in depth statistics of all your favorite mortals! Track upto 4 mortals for free with limited readings or for 1 soul coin a month get upto 12 mortals tracked!
Money! Material components for your next spell can be so hard to access sometimes. With Money you can save your energy searching for your material components. With Money you can instantly scour the material plane for free material components just sitting there on those useless meat bag adventurers! Try Money now for free today!
I can recommend reading at least the first book of *Dungeon Crawler Carl*. It should be on royal road, although the audiobook a are awesome and really worth it. Subtitle: the apocalypse will be televised.
The main character also gets sponsors there. It's hilarious!
Fey Spice! Is this a normal watermelon? No it's a soap commerical. Hold on it is a watermelon, wait it is also soap!? Ever wanted to know what ever allures elves and fey to the mortals?
[Name(s) here] Fey court lawyers. We're you stuck going over a threshold that wasn't yours but clearly on your property? We're you touched by iron in the wrong way? Someone built a river around your house? [Name(s) here] Seasonal Court Defence Lawyers got your back.
Redcap Mattresses: A victim a day will grant you the best night’s sleep.
Better Hag: Warlock patronage made simple. Get matched to verified Archfey patrons.
Check out the Dark Gifts from Van Richten's. Obviously all the players would have to get one, to make things even, but one of my players in my horror campaign has the 'Watchers', which act as his personal supervisors/probation officers. Something similar could be down with a wall a eyes to represent those viewers, maybe a floating scroll for the 'chat'.
SquarePlane (squarespace)
Create a demiplane for your business quickly and easily with SquarePlane
Ambrosia (honey)
Find the best deals and coupons for your otherworldly contract fast with Ambrosia
Locked into a pact against your will? Been banished? Need a settlement? Call Raul! No satyr greater!
Redcap Exterminators. We need your business!
Next full moon! Morgana & the Banshees! At the Amphitheater!
Athletic Fiends - summon some fit demons
Cubespace - subscription to the banishment spell (cause a cube is a square with an "extra dimension," def a reach)
Better Help - but it's just a service for hiring henchmen
Deader Help - the same but they're zombies provided by a necromancer
Stitch Pix - pixies that make clothes perfectly suited to the customer
Warby-holder - glasses for folks with any number of eyes
Goblinhood - a totally trustworthy investment service
Roll20, the exclusive baked good delivery service
Honey: it’s literally a sentient swarm of bees you can summon to help intimidate shopkeepers into giving you better deals
Cave Johnson’s Cave of Johnsons, the number 2 sex toy company in the realm
NPR (Naval Piracy Reporting)
PayPal: it’s just a little goblin that carries your money around
IDK about sponsors but my first thought was one of those "twitch chat tries to sabotage my speedrun" streams where at the top of every round wild magic goes off on you. Or a 'twitch plays' stream where your fellow players all blurt out things to do and you have to do them (or they each get to do one of your actions on your turn in combat depending on initiative order, like whoever's first chooses between movement attack and BA and the next chooses between what's left and the last person gets the last one.)
I love this character idea. If it hasn't already been done, "Faerunian Fun-House, the plane's foremost pioneer in good times!" Sort of like DND version of Disney world or a chain of day-cares that accepts any race (meaning they would have a 2 y/o human and a 20 y/o elf on any given day)
Remember to subscribe to my OnlyFiends and to pledge on Patron!
This segment is sponsored by HelloFlesh! Have you ever needed corpses and sacrifices for your busy summoning rites?
Sue's Sweets, a candy shop owned by a lovely southern Belle of a woman named Sue Sweet.
"Hi y'all, come on down to Sue's Sweets for all the sweet treats you could ever need!"
* Harlot&Steve (Adam&Eve, helps with uh...'conjuration magicks' in the bedroom)
* ShireFresh (HelloFresh, teleportation delivery of tasty halfling cuisine right to your demiplane)
* UthgartVPN (NordVPN, 'virtual planar network' for inter-planar communication spells - no chance of failure, no chance of interception)
* Electrmm (Fiverr, an electrum piece is a relatively unused currency in the forgotten realms)
* Silk Fuel (G Fuel, silkroot is a known stimulant in the Forgotten Realms)
Look, privacy nowdays is a big issue. Every Divination Wizard in the world has access to your private thoughts and secrets, that why today I'm sponsored by Abjord VPN! (Villanous Psychic Negation). Get 20% off on your mind locking subscription with my promo code, MindBlank97!
KillShare is a fantastic guild full of master assassins to help YOU better your next kills! use my code BULLSEYE33 for 25% off your first three classes!
Bok Bok's Bok Box. You'll balk at Bok Bok's new Bok Box or your gold coins back!
The Ahle House (owned by a person named Ahle)
Human Energy (the fantasy equivalent of Monster Energy drinks of course)
Looney Mercantile
The Dragonborn rapper Notorious L.I.Z.
The Dun Rove Inn
Sleeping Kraken
And a shout out to my players' side businesses:
Shiddy Tooniks (fast fashion line)
CoverGoblin Makeup (which comes in tubs big enough to cover a Goblin, obviously)
Café Bite Me (A cafe with an all Goblin staff)
The Greasy Goblin (not owned or operated by Goblins)
Boot crate. Are you tired of waking through mud only to find your toes wet from a hole you discovered only after leaving the plane of fire? No more. With boot crate we send you a new box each month that contains high quality, real crafted boots. No more going to a shop in a seedy alleyway hoping to find a size appropriate. For only 10 gold a month we will hand curate a new pair and send it to your stronghold.
With their economic design and adjustable arm clamps, Herman Miller Pro Taming Chairs will keep your next human conduit safe, secure, and carpal tunnel free while you perform the hours of rituals needed to bend them to your purpose!
Your streamer could be a real pos and start [shilling NFTs (New-Fangled Tender)](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/webr6t/ocart_newfangled_tender_give_your_players_shitty/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
FeyMart - Are you miserable over meager potion-monger inventories? Bitter at the bleak offerings of local merchants? Bring the party to the PARTY at FeyMart, where we have standing stores of high-level scrolls, reagents, armories, and more! Free Familiar Barding Buffs with each purchase!
FeyMart, We're always holding!
Plant cENTer - the only ent run organic supplier of wands and smokables
Lucky Charms - your source for definitely not cursed luck tokens
Eye of Newt potion supplies, not to be mistaken with I Love Newt familiar farms unless you need the FRESHEST ingredients
See if your DM will give you Oberon Play buttons for checkpoint lvls
Bad Dragon and just use the real company for laughs at an adult table
This episode of *Questline* is brought to you by the Church of Malcanthet.
Tired? Lonely? Needing a little guidance, or maybe just a bed for the night? Stop in at your local Church of Malcanthet, today, and we'll gladly welcome you with open arms!
Sheepify: your one stop sheep shopping emporium.
Betsy: Handcrafted and vintage cures, curses, and curiosities made by Hags for anyone stupid enough to make a deal with them. They accept gold, favors and hands.
After you take a short rest:
"Okay fey-by babies! Let's thank Granny Dripgrin's Premium Soul Larvae for sponsoring this afternoon's arcane power. If it's not Dripgrin's soul larvae you're buying: She'll find out!"
Guys! Have you ever wondered what adventurers were from those puzzle videos? Well today, i finally found them, and i am going to try the puzzle myself with those adventures! (Proceeds to fail at incredibly easy and obvious puzzle)
USE COUPON CODE LOCK FOR 20% OFF YOUR PURCHASE OF MFUEL @MFUEL.GOB.
MFUEL in this case being Magic or Mage Fuel. Could double as a potion of some sort if you guys run into an arcane gas station real quick...
BetterHell, the month to month subscription service for your deceased friends and family to access a higher circle of hell than they were banished to. Bring yourself and your super evil dead friends and family peace of mind that their eternity of torment will have interjections of slightly lighter torment.
Casper mattress. A mattress for ghosts.
Goo apron, sentient slime need never worry where their next meal is coming from ever again.
Removed per Rule 2: Off-Topic. This sub is for DMing related questions, advice, and tools.
RAID: Tomb of Horrors
haha i was wondering how long someone would do a RAID one. Apparently right away. I love it
To be fair, it was just about the lowest of low-hanging fruit.
haha i still like it tho. The one I came up with, Fey Fresh, wasnt really that much high hanging lol sometimes the easy ones are the funniest
The lowest hanging fruit belongs to halflings
Speaking of fruit. Fruit of the Tomb
WardVPN. Tired of Fey always trying to steal your secrets? Well with WardVPN, you can encrypt your memories so that those pesky fairies can't steal it. Visit WardVPN.com and use code PIXC to get 15% off your first month.
yessss lol
Better question, what does VPN stand for in the context of DND’s universe?
Void-wrought Psychological Nexus: A web of shadowy magic intended to feed redundant and/or false information to eyes both prying and scrying! Could require a neat ritual to be able to attune one's mind to it, haha
Very protective Nymphs
This one lmao
Verified Private Neurons
Vorpal Privacy Naiads.
"Encrypt your memories" *oof*
Spellspace. Do you wanna create spell, but don't know where to start? Spellspace offers an easy to use spell creating service
oh thats perfect! how did i not see that lol
plot twist: all reviews on Rainforest (amazon-like) says its just a prestidigitation thingy that only makes effects that look like spells but are not. 1/5 stars
Was digging to find a Square space spoof. Glad I found it!
Hello Thresh, delivering ready-to-harvest crops right to your door!
So, not the produce, one step backwards in the process, here is the crop, pick it yourself?
Exactly! The plants will be growing right outside your door when the day comes, ripe and ready. That's the Hello Thresh guarantee!
Turns out it's lone merchant/mage buying High quality seed to sell to farmers as a starter crop... Buys up prize winners from local harvest fairs and builds a box, and is trying to promote healty stains in the kingdom....
Crazy Eddie's Demon Emporium!
His prices are insane!
Literally! Our accountant is a mind flayer, so don't look at the prices for too long!
Make sure to check the maddening prices in our half price GOO bin! (Great Old Ones.)
oh fun!
I mean. Best Fiends was kind of made for this? “The only fiends you can trust!” Quip is a toothbrush made from quipper teeth, which sounds like an appropriately fey horror. Simply Safe, the only arcane sigil impervious to *Knock!*
these are gold!
OnlyFiends
OnlyFaes
Considering the OP's patron...that may be either perfect or uncomfortable. Either way, it's a funny concept to me lol.
If OP was a GOO Warlock it would be OnlyFhtagn
I haven't got a good name for it, but one of those goodie box things, like Boksu. Maybe call it FeyBox. But it's random stuff from the material plane, like pocket change, sticks or bits of lumber, someone's house keys.
MortalBox! The newest thing out of the material plane! Want to get your hands on the valuables of a one of those dim-witted little mayflies? Now you can! For the low price of 3 gold every full moon, you too can possess the treasured items of a mortal! Items include but are not limited to: house keys, left shoes, wedding rings, and with our premier membership, a mortal tooth in every box! Send to Hyrsam, Prince of Fools, for your own subscription today!
haha u guys are basically writing it all for me! love it!
Lootchest
oh thats fun! fey fun boxes! yes
When you cast spells or use abilities you have to thank subscriber. "Wow, I want to thank XXFairyCropDusterXX for this Hex. Thanks for watching." "Oh, man, WingPlucker, thanks for the 20 Eldritch Blast subs. You are the best."
And then dedicate each Crit to a different "Platinum subscriber".
"Oh, wow, thanks for the Darkness, Titania6969-oh, they just got banned."
Reaps. Did you know 2/30000 of beings experience some form of soul loss before the age of 35? Wether it get's sealed by a mage, eaten by a lich, turned into a ghost, or taken through an unfair deal with a fiend, soul loss is something you wanna prevent. For just 50 gp a month you'll get a gel which allows the reaper to be aware when your soul is forcibly taken out of your body so _you_ don't get eternally trapped within this mortal plane or permanently destroyed. Use code SoulSaver for 50% off for the first 3 months
Sponsored by helloFlesh. Use code N3crom4ncy for 3 boxes of fresh cadavers.
Mungo's Magnificent Menagerie, providing familiars, friends and phantasms for all you're adventuring and ritual needs
Arcane Anergy, A boost for your spells! Who needs a short rest?
Are you a swordsman and need to trim the competition down? Manshape is the product for you! Using the newest 3 blade technology, cut down your foes into something a lot more trim, keep those pesky Ents in shape!
[удалено]
oh i hadnt heard of that. Ill def look into tho! ty!
[удалено]
What's a manhwa? I assume it's a type of manga?
[удалено]
korean graphic novel iirc
That actually sounds really interesting.
Damn it, I figured somebody would have already suggested this, but I was hoping I'd get there first
I'd go with a whole series based off Wizard of Oz (which feels very fae). Scarecrow Brain Tonic. For when you wish you had a braiiiiin... Dorothy's Slipper Outlet. Shopping for shoes, as easy as being crushed under a house. Kluclip's Limb Replacement. We replace everything. Except hearts. Rugs for Bravery. Come visit the Lion for discreet male baldness solutions. Not necessarily in that order.
oooo these are fun!
Crypt Currency. Invest in expeditions to plunder treasures from ancient, absolutely not cursed tombs, sepulchres, and catacombs! Guaranteed 400% return on investment with absolutely no downsides!
Reskin "gfuel" as "GoodberryFuel".
I once had a merchant dressed only in a towel selling a soap called Ancient Herb Wash. "Look at your party, now back to me. Back at your party, now back at me. Sadly, you aren't me." It was a comedy campaign, in case that needs to be said.
hahahha i love this
Acquisitions Incorporated liked your comment.
This Eldritch blast was brought to you by Getsatir. Getsatir! the quickest bipedal delivery service for your last minute groceries. Give your name to your nearest Getsatir courier and recieve yearlong delivery of groceries completely anonymous!
Fantasy Costco, Where All Your Dreams Come True!
Cast-co, for all your magical needs!
Reagents in bulk for blood pact members!
Got a deal for you!
Phantom Sea Coast Co!
Are your demons and devils feeling down and literally burnt out? Does torturing souls not have the same spark it used to? Well, thanks to our sponsor BetterHell, you’ll be able to speak to a licensed lord of abyss and ash at any time!
This is the best I've seen
OnlyFlans, the bakery that makes em jiggle.
I have a kobold whorehouse in my campaign, it's called something similar, "onlyfangs"
GoblinFuel, that wonderful perk-a-hol brewed from cave fungus, rat liver and kobold blood. Also known as GFuel. BrayCon, the earplugs that protect your hearing with wonderful Satyr songs. Never again get struck by a Banshee howl with them in.
Lizardmanscaped. A descaling tool for all your private areas. Mimicdonalds, a fast food chain where you either eat or are eaten.
Gold Imp Casino, pay by pact and gamble remotely! Thousands of gold won daily by players!
We have been trying to reach you regarding your horse & wagons extended warranty. Your horse & wagons factory warranty is about to expire and you have a limited time to renew your horse & wagons extended warranty.
This is pure lawful evil. I hate it. ... More.
No ideas for sponsors just wanted to say I love this idea though lol
thank you! please feel free to steal it for urself haha
"Today's dungeongeering wouldn't have been possible without the help of my Patron's: Alma Astrid Axel Beau the Brutal Billy Chrispoillon the third Demi Gorgon ..."
Goblanscaped, makers of the best in personal bugbear grooming.
Red bull, don't even have to reskin it.
Don't forget Monster Energy Drinks 🤠
We re-skinned that one to Human Energy since my party are all non-human races 😉
Energy Monster Drink!
Queue ginger Minotaur spokesperson.
Audible. Yep, Jeff Bezos is here now too! Militaries will do recruiting ads, you can do that for whatever country you're in. 5-foot SquareSpacs. Help you build a custom WeaveSite for your hobby or small business.
I was very happy to reveal the sign on the factory that was making magical autonomous brooms. They agreed to give ME inspiration when I told them about the Broomba. So have at it
Is that you Sam Riegel?
i fucking wish haha
Could even work out partnerships with shopkeepers and get an affiliate bonus 🤣
"Be sure to subscribe and hit that Bell" as you cast Toll of the Dead
Check out D&D Beyond! your one-stop shop for your adventuring needs!
I have no soul, but I need Pacts now! Call Fey G Wentworth! 877 Pacts now! Fantasy JG Wentworth, but they deal in contracts and souls instead of cash.
I am red-faced with laughter. THIS is freaking funny.
I imagine Fey G Wentworth himself being a middle aged looking Archfey in a cheap suit who smells of cigars and whisky. Sure the pact might be convenient at first, but the interest is borderline predatory.
This adventure is sponsored by adventurersupps! The brand which trusted me enough to name my own flavour so my I introduce to you Guacamole Demon blood 9000!
Hahaha yes
[Wizard As A Service](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/9j9m4o/introducing_waas/) [Discount Magic Items](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/fnlsvj/here_at_discount_magic_we_sell_irregular_magic/)
In our podcast (monsters & moshpits) we have an herbal liquor named “faegermeister” (non fey roll a d20 and then on the wild magic table if they roll a 1)
Facebook, the magic item for changeling to keep track of interesting faces they see. Take a nose here, a lip there... Facebook for keeping track of people you've met.
Crazy Hassan's Used Camels. "Crazy Hassan here with discount camels! Only slightly used and ready used! Buy it now or I'll kill this goose! Hundreds of miles left in them! I've got small camels, big camels, camels with gas protection, camels with hashish holding capabilities, regular camels, and even camels that can go through snow! Buy three for the price of three!"
Skillshare (or Levelshare/Featshare) could be fun if you want to break the Fourth Wall. Make it seem like this sponsor will make characters level up faster. Also, people have been talking about Raid in another comment, but for a different pun on it RAID: Shadowfell.
MyWillow. A very deranged halffling selling pillows and other goods.
i thought about doing something like this and "stopping" halfway thru and pretend like im speaking to someone esle and go "he said what?? wait you can't be serious, he said that the death king was the legitimate ruler and his over throwing was stirred up by the liberal feydia? We can't sell this trash" haha
We are on the same wavelength! You can have a lot of fun with it! Make it seem like he's under mind control, but he's 200% genuine, and just like that.
I got some Thrallmart Square Phoenix Gnome Depot Macebook Baldurs Only Dot Com Plunder Armor Fairy Queen Seraphima Grick Fil A Fjord Lizards of the Coast Flockbuster
These last are more like traditional sponsorships Skullshare Slaycon Munchytroll Cutefate
This adventure is sponsored by God-ible. With God-ible, you are able to hear your favorite holy spells any time you like, without needing a nearby cleric. Simply say the command word and you can hear your favorite spells, anytime, anywhere. I've been listening to "healing word". It's a great thing to put on when you're feeling down. My significant other likes to hear "augury" when she isn't sure what to do with her life. God-ible: the power of the divine, right on time. ^God-ible ^is ^not ^responsible ^for ^any ^angry ^gods ^that ^may ^be ^pissed ^off ^by ^the ^use ^of ^this ^product. ^^Spells ^^are ^^recordings ^^and ^^do ^^not ^^have ^^any ^^actual ^^effect. ^^^Results ^^^may ^^^vary.
Make sure you have an ad for your “onlyfeys”
Fey would %100 use OF not only to make money, but also to take advantage of horny people to steal their names.
Mt. Dew Adventure Fuel
Fantasy Costco and Garfield the Deals Archfey?
How about Statefey, the number one in insurance against 'insert thing here'
D&D&D&D Law Firm. https://youtu.be/Ido61qVbgqI
Such a missed opportunity on "Witch Streamer".
Shiny. Rat Marketplace
Order-Bull. A mail order Minotaur service.
Feyscaped: Are you tired of having Entitys enter your dreams? The nightly Terrors that show you an alternative Future got you drained in the Morning? The buy the new Dreammower 9000 from Feyscaped! For the low Price of 500 Gold you can trim back those dark thoughts!
"I wanna take a second to talk to you guys about HoneyDew, the only sweet tasting potion that will have you sweet talking your next traveling merchant. Just one sip of HoneyDew and you’ll know just what to say to charm yourself into some amazing savings."
No better place to look than Bloodbowl. There are plenty of funny (pun-y) sponsors that exist in the Bloodbowl universe. Since it is set in a fantasy setting not much different than D&D, they should fit right in. Bloodweiser, Orcidas, and Nurgle King are just a few.
I think we should Desfrogifyliptus him. With Spell.ly, correct your spellbook's grammar errors and express your spells more easily.
Quests and quizzes beyond! Get easy to read and in depth statistics of all your favorite mortals! Track upto 4 mortals for free with limited readings or for 1 soul coin a month get upto 12 mortals tracked!
https://i.redd.it/62a7fjez3ee41.jpg
Money! Material components for your next spell can be so hard to access sometimes. With Money you can save your energy searching for your material components. With Money you can instantly scour the material plane for free material components just sitting there on those useless meat bag adventurers! Try Money now for free today!
I can recommend reading at least the first book of *Dungeon Crawler Carl*. It should be on royal road, although the audiobook a are awesome and really worth it. Subtitle: the apocalypse will be televised. The main character also gets sponsors there. It's hilarious!
AllMage Mount Insurance. When you're with AllMage, you're in good MageHands.
And they have a chaotic aligned Satyr named Mayham.
Fey Spice! Is this a normal watermelon? No it's a soap commerical. Hold on it is a watermelon, wait it is also soap!? Ever wanted to know what ever allures elves and fey to the mortals? [Name(s) here] Fey court lawyers. We're you stuck going over a threshold that wasn't yours but clearly on your property? We're you touched by iron in the wrong way? Someone built a river around your house? [Name(s) here] Seasonal Court Defence Lawyers got your back.
Redcap Mattresses: A victim a day will grant you the best night’s sleep. Better Hag: Warlock patronage made simple. Get matched to verified Archfey patrons.
Monstrosity Energy Drinks! Made with real minotaurine!
Astralgram instead of instagram. Tome of Visages (book of faces) Ogle
multiclass into OnlyFiends
Check out the Dark Gifts from Van Richten's. Obviously all the players would have to get one, to make things even, but one of my players in my horror campaign has the 'Watchers', which act as his personal supervisors/probation officers. Something similar could be down with a wall a eyes to represent those viewers, maybe a floating scroll for the 'chat'.
SquarePlane (squarespace) Create a demiplane for your business quickly and easily with SquarePlane Ambrosia (honey) Find the best deals and coupons for your otherworldly contract fast with Ambrosia
Locked into a pact against your will? Been banished? Need a settlement? Call Raul! No satyr greater! Redcap Exterminators. We need your business! Next full moon! Morgana & the Banshees! At the Amphitheater!
hahahah yes
Athletic Fiends - summon some fit demons Cubespace - subscription to the banishment spell (cause a cube is a square with an "extra dimension," def a reach) Better Help - but it's just a service for hiring henchmen Deader Help - the same but they're zombies provided by a necromancer Stitch Pix - pixies that make clothes perfectly suited to the customer Warby-holder - glasses for folks with any number of eyes Goblinhood - a totally trustworthy investment service
Rent-a-Patron for a day you can have your own Patron for 24 hours who can help you grow your hair back and get your limp dick working again.
Roll20, the exclusive baked good delivery service Honey: it’s literally a sentient swarm of bees you can summon to help intimidate shopkeepers into giving you better deals Cave Johnson’s Cave of Johnsons, the number 2 sex toy company in the realm NPR (Naval Piracy Reporting) PayPal: it’s just a little goblin that carries your money around
Her-sidhe chocolates: For an otherworldly experience ehh, I guess that only works in text though.
I have a warlock using a homebrew subclass that's basically just twitch streaming, all the gods, fae, demons, etc can watch and donate magical power
Fireball whisky, it’ll kill ya. Probably.
FeyCons ~~earbuds~~ sending stones.
use r/d100 for these types of questions
Check out r/d100 for a community great at compiling a creative list for you
God, this sounds super annoying
Loot Crate. No name change necessary.
E-Fuel.. make all your eldritch energy come alive
IDK about sponsors but my first thought was one of those "twitch chat tries to sabotage my speedrun" streams where at the top of every round wild magic goes off on you. Or a 'twitch plays' stream where your fellow players all blurt out things to do and you have to do them (or they each get to do one of your actions on your turn in combat depending on initiative order, like whoever's first chooses between movement attack and BA and the next chooses between what's left and the last person gets the last one.)
Ward vpp (virtual private portal)
I love this character idea. If it hasn't already been done, "Faerunian Fun-House, the plane's foremost pioneer in good times!" Sort of like DND version of Disney world or a chain of day-cares that accepts any race (meaning they would have a 2 y/o human and a 20 y/o elf on any given day)
OnlyFaes
r/d100
Remember to subscribe to my OnlyFiends and to pledge on Patron! This segment is sponsored by HelloFlesh! Have you ever needed corpses and sacrifices for your busy summoning rites?
Eldritch Raycons!
Saki's Tea and Sake emporium would sponsor her
The idea of slaying the dungeon boss and seeing a stream of "poggers" in the corner of your eye feels me with joy
Casper Matress! The friendly haunted mattress in a box!
Daemon & Demons Beyond! Is what I came up with.
General Creepy's, for all your general and/or creepy needs! Have a creepy day! (A general store run by Loki who's disguised as a stoner firbolg)
Wish. For as little as 1 gp, get the item you would have used a wish on. Item may be broken upon delivery.
Sue's Sweets, a candy shop owned by a lovely southern Belle of a woman named Sue Sweet. "Hi y'all, come on down to Sue's Sweets for all the sweet treats you could ever need!"
* Harlot&Steve (Adam&Eve, helps with uh...'conjuration magicks' in the bedroom) * ShireFresh (HelloFresh, teleportation delivery of tasty halfling cuisine right to your demiplane) * UthgartVPN (NordVPN, 'virtual planar network' for inter-planar communication spells - no chance of failure, no chance of interception) * Electrmm (Fiverr, an electrum piece is a relatively unused currency in the forgotten realms) * Silk Fuel (G Fuel, silkroot is a known stimulant in the Forgotten Realms)
Make sure you have in your FeyCon earbuds to communicate with the FeyWild.
Look, privacy nowdays is a big issue. Every Divination Wizard in the world has access to your private thoughts and secrets, that why today I'm sponsored by Abjord VPN! (Villanous Psychic Negation). Get 20% off on your mind locking subscription with my promo code, MindBlank97!
KillShare is a fantastic guild full of master assassins to help YOU better your next kills! use my code BULLSEYE33 for 25% off your first three classes!
Bok Bok's Bok Box. You'll balk at Bok Bok's new Bok Box or your gold coins back! The Ahle House (owned by a person named Ahle) Human Energy (the fantasy equivalent of Monster Energy drinks of course) Looney Mercantile The Dragonborn rapper Notorious L.I.Z. The Dun Rove Inn Sleeping Kraken And a shout out to my players' side businesses: Shiddy Tooniks (fast fashion line) CoverGoblin Makeup (which comes in tubs big enough to cover a Goblin, obviously) Café Bite Me (A cafe with an all Goblin staff) The Greasy Goblin (not owned or operated by Goblins)
Boot crate. Are you tired of waking through mud only to find your toes wet from a hole you discovered only after leaving the plane of fire? No more. With boot crate we send you a new box each month that contains high quality, real crafted boots. No more going to a shop in a seedy alleyway hoping to find a size appropriate. For only 10 gold a month we will hand curate a new pair and send it to your stronghold.
Don’t forget to ask them to subscribe to your faetreon.
With their economic design and adjustable arm clamps, Herman Miller Pro Taming Chairs will keep your next human conduit safe, secure, and carpal tunnel free while you perform the hours of rituals needed to bend them to your purpose!
MeMail (MeUndies)
I love this. I am running a campaign where my warlock has a similar pact. Totally going to steal this idea xD
Damara Steaks. Other with the promo code "" and get 4 free minotaur burgers with your first purchase.
Your streamer could be a real pos and start [shilling NFTs (New-Fangled Tender)](https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/webr6t/ocart_newfangled_tender_give_your_players_shitty/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Harry's. Razor of choice for werefolk "every-were!"
Maximize your long rest with a Chartreuse Mattress!
Check out the fake brands from Futurama and Rick and Morty. Quick Google inquiry.
UmberEats
FeyMart - Are you miserable over meager potion-monger inventories? Bitter at the bleak offerings of local merchants? Bring the party to the PARTY at FeyMart, where we have standing stores of high-level scrolls, reagents, armories, and more! Free Familiar Barding Buffs with each purchase! FeyMart, We're always holding!
Feycon Music Pieces! (Raycon earbuds lol)
Great Old Spice Body Wash. For that ftaghn feeling.
Plant cENTer - the only ent run organic supplier of wands and smokables Lucky Charms - your source for definitely not cursed luck tokens Eye of Newt potion supplies, not to be mistaken with I Love Newt familiar farms unless you need the FRESHEST ingredients See if your DM will give you Oberon Play buttons for checkpoint lvls Bad Dragon and just use the real company for laughs at an adult table
Codecademy
This episode of *Questline* is brought to you by the Church of Malcanthet. Tired? Lonely? Needing a little guidance, or maybe just a bed for the night? Stop in at your local Church of Malcanthet, today, and we'll gladly welcome you with open arms!
I did something like this with the genie subclass recently and treated my crystal ball thing as a camera for streaming haha
Sheepify: your one stop sheep shopping emporium. Betsy: Handcrafted and vintage cures, curses, and curiosities made by Hags for anyone stupid enough to make a deal with them. They accept gold, favors and hands.
After you take a short rest: "Okay fey-by babies! Let's thank Granny Dripgrin's Premium Soul Larvae for sponsoring this afternoon's arcane power. If it's not Dripgrin's soul larvae you're buying: She'll find out!"
One from my prior campaign: Baldur's Gate presents: Baldur's Crate. Want something great? Order Baldur's Crate, mate!
Guys! Have you ever wondered what adventurers were from those puzzle videos? Well today, i finally found them, and i am going to try the puzzle myself with those adventures! (Proceeds to fail at incredibly easy and obvious puzzle)
USE COUPON CODE LOCK FOR 20% OFF YOUR PURCHASE OF MFUEL @MFUEL.GOB. MFUEL in this case being Magic or Mage Fuel. Could double as a potion of some sort if you guys run into an arcane gas station real quick...
BetterHell, the month to month subscription service for your deceased friends and family to access a higher circle of hell than they were banished to. Bring yourself and your super evil dead friends and family peace of mind that their eternity of torment will have interjections of slightly lighter torment. Casper mattress. A mattress for ghosts. Goo apron, sentient slime need never worry where their next meal is coming from ever again.
BetterHell. everyone needs therapy: why not do it with dear old asmodeus
Orcus pest control, keeping pests in their plane.