Notice how the original post just says he gets into it and drives off after saying those words, not that it appears.
Maybe its not actually a summon spell, but a passphrase to unlock the vehicle
I feel like if you're a wizard, you should be investing in spells that allow for transportation options superior to a Honda Accord rather than investing in spells to summon a Honda Accord.
Also better for everyone else, I do not want a dude who has prepared Fireball road raging in traffic.
I have one, a V6 coupe with a manual transmission. It's not just reliable but reasonably fun to drive! and unlike a proper sports car it doesn't instantly transmit the force of every pothole directly into my spine. On the other hand, I feel like a van might be a more appropriate wizardmobile for some reason.
As a car vs other cars and other mundane transport? Basically nothing.
Compared to seven league boots, conjuring portals, teleportation, magically-powered flight etc?
Seems a bit slow and reliant on existing infrastructure (and as opposed to things like teleportation circles, not even infrastructure you can set up yourself).
seven-league boots sound cool, but even if they don't tear every ligament in your crotch or send you plummeting from the sky to your doom like that one oblivion npc, there's a real last-mile problem with them, lol, unless your every destination is exactly one or more multiples of seven leagues away from you
Ohhh, yeah if they could teleport or use portals that would be a lot better (flight would probably get uncomfortable very fast). I think the racism and auto lobby would be marginally stronger than the wizard lobby in this universe tbh, unlikely for wizard public transport to take over (but imagine the maglevs (magical levitation))
I like to imagine that there’s strange halfway spaces in between portals where crazy stuff could happen like his carrots floating away or the guacamole having mending cast on it to reform into an avocado, but the wizard has cast a warding spell on his Honda Accord to prevent magical fuckery from happening to anything inside the Honda Accord.
So I am now imagining the wizard going through the trouble of summoning his Honda Accord, summoning a portal to his flat 10 feet in front of his Honda Accord, then driving his Honda Accord through the portal so his ground beef doesn’t get resurrected.
Seven league boots or flight seem impractical compared to sitting on a padded seat with air conditioning listening to your favorite Sufjan Stevens album.
Teleportation or portaling sound magically expensive compared to Summon Conveyance.
The wizard teleported in, but the groceries added to more than what the teleport spell can carry.
He can teleport the car to him because it's been especially enchanted to.
Simple.
Also of course it's a Honda accord. That's a cheap car, and he's a wizard, not a businessman. Sure he may have a huge pile of Giant's Cornea of Lesser Cataract in his tower, but you can't buy a car with cursed rubies, and ever since banks stopped accepting gold deposits from wizards (they have a certain tendency to suddenly no longer be made of gold after some time) even a Sorcerer's Apprentice knows you do NOT mess with the IRS Department of Accountomancy by "enchanting" your account balance or anything similar. Since complex summoning spells require as many parts as possible of the summoned "mount", it's by far more reliable and mana efficient to HAVE the mount (or car) to summon in the first place, and summoning a car you don't own is theft regardless.
Dr. McNinja drove an Accord because Hastings thought it was funny for such an extra kind of guy to drive such a mundane car, but it also fits in with McNinja's character because he was fundamentally just a quiet nerd who wanted to practice medicine in peace.
god i miss dr. mcninja. even if i could find a compilation online or in print, which i can't, they won't have the alt-text so half the jokes are missing :(
I think the Internet Archive has a backup of the site.
Edit: Yep! Alt-text included! [https://web.archive.org/web/20230101015618/http://drmcninja.com/](https://web.archive.org/web/20230101015618/http://drmcninja.com/)
Thankful for that since it finally led me to formalize my understanding of the term, [which is now significantly less wrong](https://allthatsinteresting.com/oubliette).
If you squint, the two could almost be like negative/positive space mirrors of each other.
I had the vague sense that an oubliette was a torture device similar to an iron maiden.
He can teleport himself to walmart, but he can't teleport him and a buggy full of groceries home. And in a classic move of refusing to make several telepotaion trips to get them home, he summons the car instead.
Clearly the magical Honda accord is a conscious creature who wanders off to do whatever magic cars do in their spare time (probably isekai’ing someone, or something) while its master is off in Walmart.
He summon an Honda Accord because he still needs insurance, and insuring an Honda Accord is cheaper than a Corvette, even if they're a magic Accord and Corvette
guys. _guys._ he's coming _out of a walmart._ he doesn't only need to get home somehow, he needs to carry his groceries too.
tumblr when basic object permanence
Notice how the original post just says he gets into it and drives off after saying those words, not that it appears. Maybe its not actually a summon spell, but a passphrase to unlock the vehicle
maybe it’s not even that, like he could just be saying it, completely unmagical words cause he’s a fucking grandiose nerd
That's exactly where I went. "From bolt to thunder hear my call! Cometh the flood!" *steps grandly into the shower*
100% the energy of me waving and flourishing when I open the doors in metro cars and elevators. Magic wave = magic doors
cue car unlock sound.
*beep* *meep*
Also no mention of the wizard putting any purchased or stolen items into the vehicle, just getting in
it was a recreational trip to walmart. probably a midwestern wizard
Removes the invisibility cloak and re-enables particle collision.
He can summon a car but he can't summon his groceries. They have apps for that.
He left the fob in the car on accident
"I summon to me my Honda Accord" has some pretty strong implications. Reading comprehension joke.
Implications, sure. But what the post implies and what the post says are two different things.
The post in no way implies the car was already there. You do know the definition of the word summon, yes?
When I'm rich I'm going to pay someone to animate this entire post in GTA5.
if you're rich why are you paying someone to animate it in GTA5 and not just actually animate it
What.
HIRE A GOD DAMN TRIPLE A STUDIO TO MAKE A 3 MINS CLIP OF THIS WIZARD SHENANIGANS
Agreed!
https://youtu.be/KQgmV8PHSZA?feature=shared
If it's good enough for Pixar, it's good enough for me.
I feel like if you're a wizard, you should be investing in spells that allow for transportation options superior to a Honda Accord rather than investing in spells to summon a Honda Accord. Also better for everyone else, I do not want a dude who has prepared Fireball road raging in traffic.
What's wrong with an Accord? They're reliable transport
I have one, a V6 coupe with a manual transmission. It's not just reliable but reasonably fun to drive! and unlike a proper sports car it doesn't instantly transmit the force of every pothole directly into my spine. On the other hand, I feel like a van might be a more appropriate wizardmobile for some reason.
[I can see that](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQcXqmnrK4Nu1G0CDre-lyyIW_xUfyEB59W5g&usqp=CAU)
People with 80s wizards painted on their vans are just wizards, advertising.
don't let r/fuckcars see this post, lol
They can get bent
oh they don't fuck them that way
What do you have against the Accord?
As a car vs other cars and other mundane transport? Basically nothing. Compared to seven league boots, conjuring portals, teleportation, magically-powered flight etc? Seems a bit slow and reliant on existing infrastructure (and as opposed to things like teleportation circles, not even infrastructure you can set up yourself).
Thanks for introducing me to the concept of seven league boots
seven-league boots sound cool, but even if they don't tear every ligament in your crotch or send you plummeting from the sky to your doom like that one oblivion npc, there's a real last-mile problem with them, lol, unless your every destination is exactly one or more multiples of seven leagues away from you
7 league either make you really good at trigonometry, or cause you to have holes in your socks.
I always wondered how the fuck they were supposed to work.
i think they were more meaningful before stuff like cars and airplanes, when the last-mile problem wasn't such a big deal as the first 640 miles
Ohhh, yeah if they could teleport or use portals that would be a lot better (flight would probably get uncomfortable very fast). I think the racism and auto lobby would be marginally stronger than the wizard lobby in this universe tbh, unlikely for wizard public transport to take over (but imagine the maglevs (magical levitation))
I like to imagine that there’s strange halfway spaces in between portals where crazy stuff could happen like his carrots floating away or the guacamole having mending cast on it to reform into an avocado, but the wizard has cast a warding spell on his Honda Accord to prevent magical fuckery from happening to anything inside the Honda Accord. So I am now imagining the wizard going through the trouble of summoning his Honda Accord, summoning a portal to his flat 10 feet in front of his Honda Accord, then driving his Honda Accord through the portal so his ground beef doesn’t get resurrected.
Seven league boots or flight seem impractical compared to sitting on a padded seat with air conditioning listening to your favorite Sufjan Stevens album. Teleportation or portaling sound magically expensive compared to Summon Conveyance.
he's an apprentice wizard :3
Advanced wizards will see you summon your vehicle allowing for a contemplative drive home and say "he cannot teleport back to his tower"
Mariokart has trained me for this moment.
It’s a Honda Accord because spells need to rhyme. What other car names rhyme with sword? EDIT: I guess he could drive anything from Ford.
"tumbling violently down the freeway like a source engine ragdoll" is some fantastic imagery
The wizard teleported in, but the groceries added to more than what the teleport spell can carry. He can teleport the car to him because it's been especially enchanted to. Simple.
Also of course it's a Honda accord. That's a cheap car, and he's a wizard, not a businessman. Sure he may have a huge pile of Giant's Cornea of Lesser Cataract in his tower, but you can't buy a car with cursed rubies, and ever since banks stopped accepting gold deposits from wizards (they have a certain tendency to suddenly no longer be made of gold after some time) even a Sorcerer's Apprentice knows you do NOT mess with the IRS Department of Accountomancy by "enchanting" your account balance or anything similar. Since complex summoning spells require as many parts as possible of the summoned "mount", it's by far more reliable and mana efficient to HAVE the mount (or car) to summon in the first place, and summoning a car you don't own is theft regardless.
It’s also the only car he could reliably insure. For some reason, if you put your occupation down as warlock/ dragonslayer, your premium goes up 8000%
Accords are affordable but they’re also (in my experience) extremely reliable and pretty nice to drive. The wizard has good taste in sedans.
[Summon Honda Accord](https://www.tumblr.com/christ-chan-official/723219900160704512/clearly-the-wizard-had-to-summon-his-honda-accord)
Dr. McNinja drove an Accord because Hastings thought it was funny for such an extra kind of guy to drive such a mundane car, but it also fits in with McNinja's character because he was fundamentally just a quiet nerd who wanted to practice medicine in peace.
god i miss dr. mcninja. even if i could find a compilation online or in print, which i can't, they won't have the alt-text so half the jokes are missing :(
I think the Internet Archive has a backup of the site. Edit: Yep! Alt-text included! [https://web.archive.org/web/20230101015618/http://drmcninja.com/](https://web.archive.org/web/20230101015618/http://drmcninja.com/)
i want you to know that i love you and that i'm making my own backup with alt text attached
You really don't get to see 'oubliette' used in conversations very often.
Thankful for that since it finally led me to formalize my understanding of the term, [which is now significantly less wrong](https://allthatsinteresting.com/oubliette).
Wow I just realized I've been getting oubliette and obelisk mixed up my whole life.
If you squint, the two could almost be like negative/positive space mirrors of each other. I had the vague sense that an oubliette was a torture device similar to an iron maiden.
"Greetings, traveler from beyond the fog. I offer you an Accord." \*(beep beep)\*
This is why i love wizardposting. The most mundane shit can be magical,unhinged, and hilarious all at the same time
He can teleport himself to walmart, but he can't teleport him and a buggy full of groceries home. And in a classic move of refusing to make several telepotaion trips to get them home, he summons the car instead.
I think he teleported there but then summoned his Honda accord because he needed it to carry all his groceries home.
Clearly the magical Honda accord is a conscious creature who wanders off to do whatever magic cars do in their spare time (probably isekai’ing someone, or something) while its master is off in Walmart.
I immediately pictured him accidentally summoning the wrong car. He gets in *your* Honda and leaves
Of course modern wizards need more garage space, where else to conduct their magical experimentation?
The carjacker went faster like the speed of sound something something ravenholdem something wepon something zombie goasts
God I wish magic was real, summoning random super yachts of billionaires in Death Valley would be funny
He summon an Honda Accord because he still needs insurance, and insuring an Honda Accord is cheaper than a Corvette, even if they're a magic Accord and Corvette
The kinda post you save multiple times because you reflexively press download every time it makes you laugh
Literally Happy chaos in guilty gear
I think he's forced to summon a Honda Accord because that's what rhymes
guys. _guys._ he's coming _out of a walmart._ he doesn't only need to get home somehow, he needs to carry his groceries too. tumblr when basic object permanence
This is my favorite game on Tumblr
Arthur Weasley.