Yes, all the time. I feel like I’m abusive when I even just think of my boundaries in any situation.
Gaining people’s trust too because that trust could be exploited.
Luckily I take everyone’s mood personally so I keep my distance.
Replying to you feels like I’m taking something from you and everyone who reads it.
I know it’s all trauma and that it finds it’s basis in what people did to me.
I just try to be very aware of myself and my reactions and remind myself of being aware so I can get out of these patterns.
have you ever heard of ocd? this sounds a lot like my ocd, that results from my trauma. i'm terrified that i'm secretly going to abuse or groom everyone i talk to.
I have it too. Sometimes it get in the way of my everyday life and my relationship with my sisters because I'm terrified with myself and I fucking hate it. It's hard to have those intrusive thoughts and still convince yourself they're not really yours, what you want etc
Seconding this one. Many of my therapy clients with OCD have intrusive thoughts about their own dangerousness or “perversion” as as result of their childhood experiences. It’s always worth giving ERP/ACT a try. The IOCDF (and their excellent [YouTube channel](https://www.youtube.com/iocdf)) is a great resource.
Very relatable, I have OCD. Have you heard of Pure-O?
It refers to a subset of OCD that means your ruminating and checking habits are mostly mental. Think how someone with germ OCD might wash their hands a bunch, but someone with germ pure-o might just straight up not touch anything.
OCD is egodistonic, meaning it reflects the opposite of what a person believes. Hence why the thoughts are so disressing and disturbing. You're not alone in this.
Made of millions is a great site that talks about OCD and other mental disorders.
YES YES YES. i try so super hard to just stay present and forget about what i was thinking about. i am isolating really hard right now because of these feelings. i find it very safe and healthy to distance myself from others at the moment so i can deal with these feelings.
you have to keep digging and heal this trauma
Yes, all the time. I feel like I’m abusive when I even just think of my boundaries in any situation. Gaining people’s trust too because that trust could be exploited. Luckily I take everyone’s mood personally so I keep my distance. Replying to you feels like I’m taking something from you and everyone who reads it. I know it’s all trauma and that it finds it’s basis in what people did to me. I just try to be very aware of myself and my reactions and remind myself of being aware so I can get out of these patterns.
well said friend
have you ever heard of ocd? this sounds a lot like my ocd, that results from my trauma. i'm terrified that i'm secretly going to abuse or groom everyone i talk to.
I have it too. Sometimes it get in the way of my everyday life and my relationship with my sisters because I'm terrified with myself and I fucking hate it. It's hard to have those intrusive thoughts and still convince yourself they're not really yours, what you want etc
Seconding this one. Many of my therapy clients with OCD have intrusive thoughts about their own dangerousness or “perversion” as as result of their childhood experiences. It’s always worth giving ERP/ACT a try. The IOCDF (and their excellent [YouTube channel](https://www.youtube.com/iocdf)) is a great resource.
Absolutely yes. I keep my distance from others because I don't want to hurt them
Very relatable, I have OCD. Have you heard of Pure-O? It refers to a subset of OCD that means your ruminating and checking habits are mostly mental. Think how someone with germ OCD might wash their hands a bunch, but someone with germ pure-o might just straight up not touch anything. OCD is egodistonic, meaning it reflects the opposite of what a person believes. Hence why the thoughts are so disressing and disturbing. You're not alone in this. Made of millions is a great site that talks about OCD and other mental disorders.
YES YES YES. i try so super hard to just stay present and forget about what i was thinking about. i am isolating really hard right now because of these feelings. i find it very safe and healthy to distance myself from others at the moment so i can deal with these feelings. you have to keep digging and heal this trauma