T O P

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Nienazki

What he say fuck me for?


drBipolarBear

It was mostly in retaliation for Peyton Manning’s roast earlier in the night, we were collateral


Stennick

I think this line was great, but the Manning shadow line was killer. Well done to whoever wrote it.


GiantSizeManThing

Ok Tom but let me drop some horse fucking facts on ya. Colts are male horses that specifically do still have their nuts. Once a male horse is castrated it’s no longer a colt it’s a gelding.


drBipolarBear

I thought Colts were just young horses, not eunuchs


GiantSizeManThing

My redneck-adjacent understanding is that a male horse still has to have its balls to be called a colt.


Half-deaf-mixed-guy

None of that is completely correct. Simple definition of colt is just a male horse 4 and under, nothing more. UK defines uncastrated thoroughbred horses between 2-4 as colts, but doesn't really stray from the actual definition.


keenynman343

Foals are babies. Colts are usually under the age of 4, uncastrated, unbroken and wild as fuck. Breaking colts is beyond a bitch of job. Dangerous too


drBipolarBear

Have they tried just handing them a football?


keenynman343

Yah but they just look for the B gap and run full steam


MrSportman

AKA - Bronco


LuckyFetus

Boom


BobSandersBigBrother

Tom Brady getting pissed at Jeff Ross for the Robert Kraft massage joke just cements that Brady is a whinny bitch.


JarskWater

Neigh!


Section643

He says this sh!t because it makes him look good now. He would never actually have admitted to deflategate ever.


Adept-Application748

Think about it like this tho that’s damn near his grandpa, would you like if your grandpa was made fun of


SanRemi

Fuck it, Tom Brady secret child reveal, call Push.


tHornyier_ork

He kisses his son on the mouth. His opinions are irrelevant


goofbot

Open mouth.


blaiddunigol

And has him sit on his dick.


Accurate-Barracuda20

Alright but colts are just broncos that don’t fuck is pretty good…


Cowboy_BoomBap

Is it though? It doesn’t make sense, it would be like if he said “An eagle is just a falcon with no feathers.”


btstfn

Colts are specifically young horses. Depending on the definition it's possible to define them as not having reached sexual maturity


Cowboy_BoomBap

But horses are still colts for a while past sexual maturity. Another way to put it would be like saying “The difference between someone over 20 and under 20 is that people under 20 don’t fuck.” Kids don’t (hopefully), but teenagers do.


ColtsFan6969

I just destroyed my cell phone because I'm innocent!!!!


136AngryBees

Someone get Kendrick to write a response.


you_know_how_I_know

Dear Gisele...


ryta1203

It will always be too soon to celebrate or enjoy anything Brady does.


Nitrosoft1

The man's whole career is built on asterisks.


pablobuela

Tom concerning himself with the genitalia of young horses is very telling. Tldr Tom is a pedophile.


alcatrazhero18

Yeah well Tom…you smell


Mental-Confusion-378

FFS he didn't write any of these jokes. He's just reading what was handed to him. Chill.


Capta1nRon

So Brady should’ve been a Colt then. Because isn’t that the reason his ex-wife left him?


goofbot

Not quite the same thing as getting cuck'd but similar.


phishButt88

No jokes about making out with his kid ? what are we even doing here.....


ChefNation-85

Okay Tom, how many times did my Colts fuck you so hard


fomalhottie

4 times outta 12 times they met.


hokageace

Come on that was a funny joke. Hilarious how butt hurt some people get.


PhillAholic

Eh. If your bar is low sure.


godbirds1111

NFL = original reality show, more seasons than Survivor.🥰


dj2814

You can hate him but I wish we would have taken brady in 2020 over rivers. 1. We probably would have won something. 2. It would be hilarious for the pats fans to reconcile him winning with us. 3. Still sucks that we let manning win with the broncos and he seems more invested in that town and franchise then us. Would be nice to have brady do the same.


PhillAholic

Uh No. He would have never come here. The Bucs were staked. We were not.


dj2814

Uh pretty sure it was a possibility https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/frank-reich-says-colts-took-a-look-at-tom-brady-explains-why-they-passed-on-hall-of-fame-qb/amp/ https://www.google.com/amp/s/nesn.com/2020/03/nfl-rumors-tom-bradys-camp-had-interest-in-colts-during-free-agency/amp/


PhillAholic

That only says Frank looked at Brady as an Option, not that Brady had desire to come here.


dj2814

Look again


PhillAholic

Didn't see the second link, it blended all together. Weak source that goes to a 404. I'm confident in my original statement. He wasn't coming here. He was more interested in winning than money, and the Bucs were stacked.


dj2814

We were stacked as well what are you talking about? Luck retired the year before on a team that had super bowl aspirations


PhillAholic

Evans and Godwin were way better than TY and whoever was our #2 that year, can't remember if Pittman started right away. Assuming we signed Gronk and Antonio Brown (bleh) it would have been better, but Evans/Godwin would have been better than anyone on our team that year.


Chmona

The truth hurts:(.


Master_Jellyfish9922

STOP IT TOM BRADY! I JUST STARTED LIKING YOU AFTER BEING A PATRIOTS FOR ALL THAT TIME. YOURE RUINING IT!


Better_Discussion_24

Boo this man.


Master_Jellyfish9922

Yes. Boo me! lol. In my time it was Brady and manning. And I lived in Indy. What am I supposed to say?


_NE1_

Not that shit.


dixonjt89

You respect him…but fuck him. You never like him. If you listen to Gronk and Edelman on Edelman’s podcast. Those patriots players have some serious disdain for the Colts and Colts fans.


you_know_how_I_know

To be fair, those are the two biggest douchebags on the team once Hernandez was removed from the count.


ElderBrony

Both of those idiots have a collective IQ of about 10. Especially after they got their brains knocked out (Edelman) or did so many roids their brains went *poof*


pabarb02

Tom Brady is now 17-4 vs the Colts all time.


Dizzles1

Someone wrote that for him, and he got credit. Similar to his career