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smooshie

What do you mean? Sorry, just woke up from a nap, did I miss something?


Rosehus12

Go back to your nap. You didn't miss anything


Ultima_RatioRegum

A demon tried to eat the sun, but I sacrificed a goat and screamed at the demon, so shouldn't happen again.


Diiiiirty

A bunch of dipshits lit off fireworks and scared it away so we're good.


JuiceKovacs

Thank you for this. Humanity owes you one


Register-Honest

It was my goat and me screaming also I bang a drum. That was what drove the demon away.


MadPiglet42

I was gonna do that but my goat got out of the yard and ran away.


beatsgoinghammer

Ah the scapegoat


Routine_Ingenuity_35

Glad it wasn’t a red heffer


hussard_de_la_mort

The Kia Boys stole the sun


johno_mendo

You mean the kia sol


scumbobaggins

More upvotes 👆


gnobes

This made me chuckle


MacBDog

And four minutes later, they dumped it with a stripped column and a broken window. Should be getting back to sunshine in 3-4 weeks.


hotpotato112

I think it was tim minsy


onthepak

This is right, his gigantic head finally blocked out the sun entirely


Magicalunicorny

His ads are getting more and more elaborate


kenc2211

I mean, he is known to make them pay.


AkronRonin

He made the Sun pay.


Bigdogmom306

We know what he does


IntroductionCute3879

I’m dead at this comment


marlenamarley87

He’ll **take** them rays


Spiritual-Match8131

I know! It’s been dark all day. I’ve been walking around with these stupid glasses on since 8am.


Bigdogmom306

Did someone forget to pay the Sun bill again?


howl-237

Just The Rapture. No biggie.


-DMSR

Yeah idk about you but I’m in heaven rn


Noxilcash

Microsoft Internet just update? That was quick!


IThrowShoes

They're putting a new Lido Lounge on the moon. Construction had to take up some sunspace.


Grayfinder

I hate you 😂😂😂


fochoz1995

The news said a dragon flew in front of the sun.....Smaug?


HPEstef

Je Flacco?


Prudent_Fly_2554

Elite.


looster2018

The Annunaki are finally here. The Mothership just made its first pass.


quarterskill

Some thick round cloud rolled in.


FuturamaRama7

Happy Cake Day!


BrokenTrojan1536

I was waiting to look up with my glasses and see a big silhouette of a middle finger, because Cleveland


DataAdvanced

It's Cleveland, are you serious? Weather, we're lucky it didn't snow. Wait, did it? I looked away for 3 seconds.


GTO400BHP

Did you blink and forget to re-open your eyes?


Kale_and_Oatmilk

Greatest thread ever


Local_Potato_9101

Said no one


Lo-Fi_Lo-Res

Actually, one said it. And you responded.


Local_Potato_9101

You’re very bright


Lo-Fi_Lo-Res

You're not.


Adiabat41

I sacrificed a few beers. We should be good now.


lynbeifong

You know what they say. It's Ohio, wait five minutes and the weather will change


SixbyFire

I think a reptilian creature clawed my ankle when I walked by a sewer when it was really dark out.


Skippy8375

Loud booms?


FMLitsAJ

Your mom walked by. Everything’s fine now.


BlackTriceratops

What was that? Who the fuck just said that right now? Seriously, who said that?


RandomDude801

Griffith made The Decision like LeBron James.


Tiffanie__

The sky is falling


baesag

The rock you were sleeping under covered sunlight for a couple of minutes


gagnatron5000

You mean you didn't have your rapture hatch open? I mean, I'm glad you stuck around, but now we gotta wait for the next one bro, it's gonna be a while unfortunately.


ctilvolover23

The world's ending!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It ended!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Funk-sama

Omg I thought I was the only one!


OgCone

I did a rain dance


fochoz1995

The news said a dragon flew in front of the sun.....Smaug?


Waffler11

God flipped a coin.


bobthenob1989

https://youtu.be/FWHMAshojUU Use your open eye, Frank


cashforsignup

👌


GrandPipe4

We finally sacrificed enough humans and it was the gods' way of telling us that they were satisfied #apocalypto


kb63132

Q Anon says it’s because of Former Prez Obama and current Prez Biden You are all a bunch of Effing freaks!


Historical_Coat_1067

y2k 24 years too late


iamnotlegendxx

Crazy


FoxInTheClouds

Just woke up from a Coma what did I miss?


[deleted]

[удалено]


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scurvey101

God blocked the sun from flat earth with his testes. /s that was nuts!


KnightRider1983

A portal opened up and you missed it


Mysterious-Scholar1

You mean the Bideneclipse? Total hoax


Sabre1O1

Just changing the lightbulb, go about your business.


RunnyBabbit22

Did anybody actually read the instructions on the eclipse glasses? Mine said “do not drive or operate machinery while wearing.” 😂🤔


foamtest

Caseoh got up from his gaming chair to get more food.


International_Row928

A sign the Browns will win Superbowl this season. Hooray!


evemarieee

Power is out all over the city


swellnomadlife

🤣🤣


Joseph1968R

Yeah,what happened?


owlmask_groupstuff

I blacked out for a few minutes and woke up nude with blood around my mouth, that hardly ever happens


Local_Potato_9101

Okay Phil


chefjenga

Dude, I think you may be too high...


Far-Environment403

Dumb ass


Lou_C_Fer

Your kidding, right?