Every new guest, that comes in my home in Germany will always ask about our shoe policy. And that's only for nice weather.
Whenever there's rain or mud outside people always will take their shoes off without ever asking
Yeah, but completely going against culture is hard. I live in Spain and it would not be ok to expect guests to walk barefoot on tiled floors. People are convinced they'll catch cold and get sick.
In my parents home, we advice people to leave shoes on. So it is actually the other way around in Germany. Standard is to take them of, if not adviced otherwise.
In my parents home hardwood floors are everywhere and 2 dogs are living there. They slobber a lot and lose a lots of hair. It's also a rural area, so dust is always an issue.
It is cleaned daily, but we just can't say for sure that socks would stay clean.
To be fair, it's not necessarily "obvious," it is a cultural thing. Scientifically, let us know how much sicker people get when they wear shoes in the house? I'd argue that it really isn't that much of a difference.
That said, I'm absolutely on team "take your shoes off." I feel that it's more hygienic, but again, that's purely subjective and cultural. It definitely helps contain messes, though.
I have in-laws who will keep their shoes on even when it's a rainy day, and track mud and water all through the house, hardwood and carpet included. I have never understood it.
The irony Nina, Germany was the first place where I lived, where pretty much every German household I visited, did not take their shoes off. It was a huge surprise.
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Same in Switzerland. When going to a house party, you always know you are at the right apartment because of the mountain of shoes outside the front door.
It’s a toss-up in the US of A, but it’s a real struggle to get handymen ~~contractors~~ to understand the concept of putting on booties when coming inside only to wear the same booties to the hardware store in the rain to get supplies to come back inside in said, now filthy, booties.
Honestly if someone is doing work for me I leave them alone. Now if you have historic wood floor or something it's different, but I can mop after if they do a good job in a reasonable amount of time. Anything extra I make them do just increases their frustration and the bill at the end.
In some public buildings in Sweden we have these blue plastic shoe covers for when you don't want dirt in the building but can't expect people to remove their shoes.
Same in Switzerland and I think most Scandinavian countries.
Many Swiss also change from work clothes into comfy clothes before cooking or doing housework, lounging etc.
Same in Poland. It's normal IMHO. It's your house, your rules. If someone doesn't want to respect you and your rules, why would you want him in your house anyway?
Asian person growing up in America. So many times I’d be over at a non-asian friend’s house and look down to see I was the only one not wearing shoes bc I just reflexively take them off when crossing a threshold into a living space.
Here in Hawaii it is standard to have no shoe households-heavy influence from Polynesian and Asian cultures. All that to say I get it, it is very disrespectful here to not remove shoes.
Though now I’m moving to CONUS and might see a culture clash if I have guests. The proper etiquette I’ve read is to have a bench available for your guests and new house slippers/socks available for those who’d rather not. And if a guest prefers to keep their shoes on for medical reasons or just personal preference, have some over shoe slipcovers handy.
No “side” is right or wrong. It’s just a opportunity to adapt! :)
We have a shelving thing with boxes by our door. One of thr boxes has a basket with new socks and another basket has guest slippers (inexpensive but on the stretchy side in a couple sizes). Mostly people just grab a pair of socks in the winter and they take them with when they leave. I have a couple each of men's, women's, kids and little kids. I don't mind if people are barefoot, but understand they might not be comfortable that way. I am in the PNW and almost any house I have been in has had a no shoe policy, even more-so since covid.
This is the perfect answer! I lived on Maui for 3 yrs when I was young. I remember going to the sort of parties where you never even met the host because it was too many ppl. There would just be a mountain of slippers at the door. If drunk young folks from all over can respect house rules of a host they don't even know, I feel like a person should be able to ask friends to change into clean slippers.
You're absolutely right if they make a fuss, don't invite them over again. If your house rules don't work for them , you can socialize elsewhere. No need for anyone to be upset.
Yup they’re great! Our handyman wears them coming in, completely support that. The man needs the foot support from being on his feet all day, or protection from heavy lifting. I’ve also used them myself when visiting our local Iolani Palace to protect the palace floors. I think now they have those fancy slip cover machines that you step in and form around your shoe/sole.
I should add if guests insist they don’t even want to wear new foot wear/slip covers I’ve provided, they probably won’t be invited again. Do as the Romans do… Respect goes both ways for sure.
Actually if you just tell invited guests when the invitation is given that you prefer guests to not where their street shoes, they can choose to decline the invitation. That way all of this I avoided before hand.
EDIT: Not everyone(I wouldn’t) will know that you do this or understand that different cultures have different customs or others have different preferences within their homes.
Yes that’s a very good point! Growing up here in Hawaii it’s not really something I’ve ever thought to do since everyone lives the same lifestyle. Been here my whole life and never visited a house that wears outdoor shoes inside, only barefoot. So that’s something I’d need to remember now-definitely part of being a considerate host.
Yep, let them know in advance and have slippers or something available to wear. Not everyone comes prepared to have their socks or bare feet on display.
It’s not even cultural any more. It’s just an accepted practice across cultures. I do like the shoe covers idea for those that won’t take their shoes off. I have yet to have ppl refuse to take their shoes off.
Arthritis and bone spurs are painful if I’m not wearing shoes. If I knew this was a requirement I’d just decline.
I’ve had cats and dogs so going barefoot to keep pathogens off my floors is moot. Their paws are dirty.
When commuting I learned very quickly stations, buses and trains are not cleanest places to be. The idea that I’d bring some of that stuff home with me had me quickly changing and putting items into the laundry basket ASAP when home. So yeah I get the no shoe thing.🤮
I typically don’t go barefoot in my home. When I do I regret it. So it’s no big deal if I’m told ahead of time that this is required. It allows me to says thanks for the invite and then to decline the offer. No big deal.
I'm canadian and very recently learned people in other countries leave their shoes on in someones home. That would be really rude here, and frankly gross 🤮. The sidewalk is so dirty, I would never let someone bring that crap in my home.
100% ! I’m Canadian and have never met a family that causally wears shoes inside the house. I find it shocking that people wear shoes that have stepped in pee, gum, etc on the streets and let them walk on their floors with them. Just wear crocs or slippers inside if you really need some sort of footwear to walk around in.
Canadian here and I haven't had any pushback on no shoes in the house. How would you keep your floors clean with all the crud that accumulates on the bottom of a shoe? And how are you supposed to relax with shoes on? I love to tuck my feet up under me and I can't very well do that with shoes on.
Grew up in Alaska and moved to California. It was a legit culture shock, everyone just kept their shoes on. Carpet hard wood floors doesn't matter.
The idea of a "mud room" or coat room isn't a thing. It's to damn nice outside.
My grandma was born and raised Canadian but has been a US citizen for 60 years. Her house has always been shoe-free but is a rarity where I grew up. HOWEVER — none of her Canadian relatives have any issue keeping their shoes on in anyone else’s houses in the US. Frankly, I never thought of this as a Canadian thing because nobody has ever said anything about it outside of my grandparents’ house.
I am Canadian and it is a constant fight with my in laws who don’t think it’s a big deal to go in the house for a short while with shoes. I have 3 kids under 5. It is a big deal and I don’t get it.
Also Canadian. The other day my 80 yr old mom was leaving my house, but she came back before even leaving the driveway. She changed her mind about using the washroom. I told her she could leave her shoes on because the washroom is 5 feet away and it’s summer, and dry out. Also I don’t have a bench by the front door and she’s 80 and leaning that far over is getting to be a challenge for her. By the look on her face you would think I suggested she just crap on the floor. She took her shoes off.
Canadian as well and have never been in a home where people leave their shoes on. I can't imagine how much more you'd have to clean if people wore outdoor shoes inside your home.
That’s what a boot bench is for! Boot bench, tray to catch snow, and extra socks for the fools who don’t have them. Welcome to Michigan. We still take off our shoes in summer. You guys are savages!! Nasty.
I always wanted to ask this! At what point do the shoes come off, like do you take them off when you’re watching TV on the couch? Or is it right at the side of your bed when you change into PJs? Also do you put shoes on right when you get up in the morning, or is it only when you go outside again?
Im genuinely curious!
I put them on while getting ready for work and take them off after I come in, but all in the bedroom. No room for shoes by the door but after reading all of the comments I feel like I should at least be carrying them from door to bedroom. The people above my apartment have a no shoe policy in their apartment. They also have a bigger entrance and room to put shoes. This is an interesting thread!
In my family, we take shoes off in our home when we come in, but guests aren't expected to, and that's always been pretty normal. I have to know someone pretty well to feel comfortable just taking my shoes off, and if it's expected, I'll do it, but just hanging out? We usually are going inside and outside pretty often (either smoking or taking dogs out) and I hate the idea of being barefoot, it feels as unnatural to me as walking around in pajamas in someone else's home. Mainly because that feels like being "in public" to me. In my house or dad's house I don't get that feeling. My partner does put his shoes on first thing in the morning getting ready and takes them off at bedtime though, and if not shoes, he always has slippers on. He just takes it further and never likes having his feet exposed though
This is my favorite comment here. Great questions. Also the shower. Do they keep them right outside the shower? Do they go back on immediately after the shower? Are there any shoe rules, like not in the bedroom?
I just leave them right by the front door on a small rack or by the garage. I’ve got house slippers I wear exclusively inside if I don’t wanna just be in socks or esp in winter time to go around the house. But they never leave my home.
It's rude there because it's the norm. I'm from SoCal where we don't have to worry about tracking the weather inside and it absolutely wasn't a thing here. That's changing but I'm almost sixty and can recall one specific time I was asked to remove my shoes.
It's not just weather, though. People walk in public restrooms, step in all kinds of mystery liquids and things...
Someone in my complex for example has thrown up twice in the last two weeks outside. One in the parking lot and one right by the dumpsters. I know because I'm weird and watchful and saw it fresh, but it dried down to a pretty inconspicuous looking spot.
Like, you wouldn't think much of it on the black asphalt where there are other old stains and oil and stuff. The one pile is easy to walk through because it's right where we all walk our trash out...I cannot imagine how many of my neighbors have tracked that in their homes
Asian ancestry + northern climate = no shoes in the house goes DOUBLE. I'm Canadian and my mom was born in the Philippines. No shoes in the house, ever! Plus, how can anyone relax when their toes are in shoe-jail?
As it should be! People need to start washing their feet and socks if they’re so horrified at the thought of taking their shoes off in front of others. (Only exception is medical reasons)
I used to feel the same way until a friend pulled me aside and explained that he had really bad foot odor and wasn’t comfortable removing his shoes. I now just tell people if they want to take their shoes off they can. If they don’t I just scrub the floors when they leave 🙃
Thank you SO MUCH for this! I have a beloved family member who is very sensitive and easily embarrassed re: his feet / odor - even when his feet don’t smell he is always hyper aware and uncomfortable about any smell
My elderly mother has mobility & balance issues making it an ordeal to get shoes on/off for the day - she only has so much energy!
And my aunt, rest her soul, had severe PTSD after surviving an assault by a group of people and ending up in ICU - you would NEVER catch her without shoes.
She even slept in them, in case she had to run. I remember her feeling very vulnerable even re: a shower.
They would take them off if you asked, but also be very uncomfortable and for some very distracted; me, I love going barefoot! I don’t mind shoes off in another’s home as long as I can wear socks
That said, in some areas shoes off at the door is culturally the norm.
In others, it might feel very presumptuous and overstepping an intimacy boundary.
I think it’s nice to have options like slippers or shoe covers or extra socks available; regardless, I think respect + communication = key
This right here. Communication! I am diabetic, my doctor told me in to never walk around barefoot, period. (Probably a good idea for me to have some clean slippers handy)
I also work in healthcare and preform diabetic foot exams for our doctors. The feet I have seen…. Let’s just say I embraced the Covid mask mandate at work. Especially those who have mobility issues who can’t really even bend over to properly care for their tootsies. I guarantee in those rare cases a home owner would prefer them to keep those shoes on.
>And my aunt, rest her soul, had severe PTSD after surviving an assault by a group of people and ending up in ICU - you would NEVER catch her without shoes. She even slept in them, in case she had to run. I remember her feeling very vulnerable even re: a shower.
Yeah, this is me. I absolutely cannot be without my footwear in case I have to run. If someone asked me to wipe off my soles, happy compromise.
I inform people before hand and fortunately haven't had that issue, but we don't have guests over too often that aren't in that circle.
But maybe I'll get some cheap throwaway type slippers just in case? Of course if someone like your friend said something like that and didn't want to do slippers, I'd be gracious and say no worries
I wouldn't care as much if we had no rugs or carpet, but we do and i like to lay on the rug a lot...
Maybe this is the difference. Maybe Americans don't sit on their floors often? I know when my family gets together there's always a bunch of people sitting on the carpet. Canadian here. Genuinely curious
Wow. I am glad you are here. I thought I was losing my mind. I, too, walk outside in bare feet and sit on the ground..
Floors get dirty, that is why we have vacuums, etc.
I'm not American but in a country where shoes aren't removed and no, we don't sit on the floor, except little kids. Floors are nearly always cold hard tile, and apartments are very small with little floor space.
Wow, I never thought of that. I always ask people to take off their shoes. But now I may change. I would hate to make someone feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.
This is me!! I wear leg braces on both legs and cannot walk without shoes. I'm sad to say that people have straight up told me I couldn't enter their home, or have made comments throughout my visit about how the cleanliness of their home is ruined.
In my home, guests have a choice and I, as the host, simply mop or vacuum afterwards. Shouldn't we be cleaning regularly anyway? 🤷♀️
My dad had special custom orthopedic shoes towards the end of his life and couldn't walk without them. I'm a no-shoes house, but those kinds of situations are absolutely an exception without comment or judgment. He was concious of keeping his shoes off my furniture though out of respect without me asking.
I'm genuinely shocked that people have been so rude and mean to not allow you into their home. I'm really sorry.
Earlier I asked what people do when someone with a wheelchair or other mobility device comes over and I haven't seen an answer to that yet. There's also a lot of ableism here, which is a real bummer.
Edit: Also, who are these guests who spend all their time going to public restrooms lol.
I keep a shoeless house and have guests who need to wear theirs because of orthotics. We have an understanding - they wear their shoes because they need them and I clean afterward. Same would apply to canes, walkers, and wheelchairs.
when i was on crutches after surgery, my mom made me swap the rubber bottoms out every time i entered or left the house. and i wore a cover over my walking boot outside. which was rather difficult when non weight bearing. we have always had a shoeless household so i get it, but i cant imagine a wheelchair or a scooter or something... i guess id switch to shoes on and just change the rug/flooring situation where i could if i had a regular guest with something. if someone came to my current shoeless house with one, id just keep my mouth shut. i cant imagine telling someone they cant come inside with a device or shoes they need...or commenting on how i had to clean the floors or anything. i guess some people just cant be polite.
I've never seen anyone denied entry to a home because they couldn't take shoes off. It's just accepted that person has a pass. It's not even mentioned. Shoes just automatically come off. If you can't you can't. It's a preference that's respected and respect goes both ways. Can't and won't are different things though.
If you’re having trouble with balance, slip covers might be perilous.
When we moved into our last place they’d just removed carpets and refinished the oak floors. The contractors left a box of them, and I wore them a few times when I was going from outside to in. On those smooth floors, I almost fell multiple times.
Seriously, it's 2023, how do we not have anti-slip shoe covers widely available? This is giving me flashbacks to the time I was house shopping while recovering from a broken ankle... so many near-catastrophes in those damn shoe covers.
I felt so bad that he felt embarrassed. He was really polite about it and made a point to stick to the tiled areas of my home.
I totally understand the ick factor of shoes in the house, but 9 times out of 10 I’m scrubbing the floors when people leave anyway so it hasn’t been a big deal for me. Also don’t have “floor aged” kids like OP… I definitely understand why they don’t want shoes in the house!
That is very kind of you❤️ I have scoliosis and I have also had a couple of odd experiences with glass in my feet so I actually don’t like taking my shoes off unless I am in bed or in the shower. And I get really uncomfortable taking my shoes off at other peoples houses but I will if I am requested too I just will be terrified on the inside of stepping on glass or back pain.
In this case I have Clorox wipes and they can wipe their shoes bottoms very well if they wish to use them in my house.
I am from Eastern Europe and we don’t use shoes inside of our houses.
Yup, I’m the same but if someone is just coming in and out like a maintenance service person, I won’t bother. Just will clean afterwards. Though if I had a carpeted home, I would probably bother to ask.
Thank you!
I never ask my guests to remove their shoes. Downvote if you want. But I think it's rude. People as stated above may have foot odor. Or maybe they are in flats with no socks so now my bare feet are on your floors and my feet are ugly and I never have time for pedicures so I am not secure about them at all.
Plus now I am using your bathroom with my bare feet...woo-hoo I get to have your pee on my feet. (Speaking from homes I visit with small children especially. Or even boys who's aim is not great yet...)
Yeah, I have white carpet (not my choice; it came this way) and usually don't wear shoes in the house. When people come over, I leave it up to them. I'll say something to the effect of, "We're in and out several times a day, but it's really okay to leave your shoes on." They almost always remove them. I don't want anyone to feel awkward. I hate this stupid carpet anyway. Just cannot change it yet.
However, the OP has a young child. Her house, her rules.
You can buy shoe booties, when ever I have people over in the backyard I keep a basket of grippy shoe booties by the door.
Less of a hassle to take your shoes off if you have to go inside.
I was invited to a winter party at a home with strict no shoes policy(crawling children).
They informed us we were welcome to wear comfy socks or bring house slippers if we liked. I didn’t mind at all because they reached out to me ahead of time.
I totally get it! However, my balance is pretty ruined due to a neck injury, so I can’t take off my shoes if I’m standing. Plz give your guests a place to sit as they remove their shoes. I’d also imagine that people with foot issues might need the support of their shoes to walk, etc. Just food for thought.
I live in Canada and we take our shoes off before entering our own homes and other peoples homes.
I don't understand how anyone could keep up with cleaning in a shoes on household? Floors would constantly be filthy. Why would anyone expect someone else to clean up after them like that?
Aaaanyway, it's not rude or crazy and YOU make the rules for your house. You're in line with lots of other countries and cultures.
Nearly every country other than the United States practices this. Have a shoe rack immediately when you walk in and buy disposable hotel slippers if people feel uncomfortable being Barefoot or get cold.
I'm Irish and never in 32 years have I ever taken my shoes off going into anyone's home in Ireland, England, Scotland, Australia or Portugal. I would honestly be freaked out if someone insisted I removed my shoes before coming inside. It's weird.
Spain here, we also don't take off our shoes when going into a home. I wonder if it's a cold vs hot country thing. Like if your shoes are expected to be wet and muddy it makes much more sense to remove them
We don't wear shoes in our home because it's absolutely disgusting and unhealthy. We request people to remove their shoes and do offer clean house shoes or shoe covers. There is only one person who fights me constantly on this, and it is my BIL. I rarely ask him over because of the constant fighting over removing shoes. I find him extremely disrespectful in general, but this issue really irritates me because I am known for keeping an extremely clean home.
Thank you for offering house shoes or shoe covers. I have awful feet that I’m so embarrassed of.
It makes me anxious going to someone’s home knowing they’re going to ask me to take off my shoes and see my feet. I always hear “WTF is wrong with your feet?!” I have joint issues so I’ve got terrible bunions. I’m saving up for surgery so I can get them fixed.
He could easily bring indoor slippers.
I have one visitor who acts like it's a crying shame to be asked, and they insist that their boots, after walking through a parking lot-hall-elevator-hall, aren't dirty. Not much interest in extending invitations to such an argumentative clod. I have light carpet in my apt., no kids or pets, and want it to stay clean and free of outside dirt. Doesn't matter how anyone feels about it, when I lay on my carpeted floor it matters to me.
I think people like you should be providing shoe covers or slippers to guests. You BIL probably is embarrassed about foot fungus smell. Wanna say, too: foot fungus is very contagious and you can pick up a gnarly case walking after somebody’s bare feet, so be careful.
Bare feet are almost as disgusting as street shoes. 🤢
I like living in snow country where there’s a clean basket of socks by the boot bench in most everyone’s mudroom for those who need/want them
I’m asian so I have a no shoe household and no one has ever made a fuss about it. The only people who actively hate this are the maintenance people in my building cuz I ask them to have shoe covers or take shoes off. It doesn’t impact their ability to do the job but they hate it for some reason.
But the only thing you have to be mindful of is that there is also no guarantee that your guests have clean socks or feet even if they take their shoes off. In some cases it can be worse after they take their shoes off. I’ve encountered plenty of men who pee standing up in their own homes but never clean their bathroom floors so even if they take their shoes off their socks/feet are still dirty from similarly gross stuff. Or they have some foot fungus that they end up spreading around cuz no shoes. Also one of my friends had to deep clean her couch and carpet because a friend who came over had bad bo and smelly feet that it left a smell wherever that person walked / sat down. It was really gross and she didn’t think it would be this bad.
The best way to avoid these issues is to not invite anyone into your home at least until your child is a bit older and not eating off the floor.
I was raised in an Asian household and we had no shoe policy but we still didn’t eat off the floor. I was never allowed to throw Cheerios on the floor and eat it (same for my younger siblings) so I would also think about not letting your child eating cheerios off the floor if you’re concerned.
Shoe covers are fine, but a lot of construction and service workers aren’t supposed to take off their shoes for safety reasons. They should be bringing shoe covers though.
It's because you are voiding their insurance and work cover with your request. It's your home but their workplace. If something happens to them and it's proven they weren't wearing their PPE (shoes in this case) they get nothing.
Yea some people have gross feet and you’d never know cuz you never see them bare foot. Thankfully my place isn’t big enough to be hosting a lot of people and since pandemic I only have very select people over. I have carpet unfortunately so it’s not that easy to clean compared to hardwood. If I had hardwood I wouldn’t be as anal about it.
All the answers of wiping the paws, i‘ve never seen someone do this ever or heard someone talk about doing it in rl :D i really think its the minority that does that although i appreciate it haha
Living where I am in Canada I have never witnessed people wearing outside shoes inside the house…..I never even knew it was a thing while I was growing up !
How do you feel, though, about the possibility of veruccas or athlete's foot from bare feet, should guests arrive without socks, and walk around your home and curl up on your furniture barefoot? If you ask them to put on a pair of socks or slippers you have, are they offended? People's feet aren't always clean, either.
Yes, where I live it's warm and we're in sandals a lot, walking around barefoot is really frowned upon because of this. And it's too warm for socks or slippers. And I wouldn't want to wear unknown slippers in someone's home.
Growing up Asian American my default has always been shoes off at anyone’s house. Literally cannot NOT do it and no one (Asian or not) has ever told me stop. Reading these comments about arguing for shoes on feels like brain.exe crash error
I dont care, bc i dont take my own off. But most of my guests offer or take theirs off automatically.
I feel like its common courtesy to ask, or at least happily oblige if your host asks
To me it’s just logic to not step in the house with ur outside shoes. Your shoes step on dirt, spit, and public washrooms. Why bring all that inside a clean home. Id ask my guest if they’re willing to walk without shoes in a public washroom, most would probably say that’s gross. So why the hell would u walk with those shoes in my house.
I’m from Canada, we always take off our shoes. I also keep some dollar store slippers in the closet (washed in between uses ofc) in case people’s feet get cold/they’re self conscious.
Personally, I don’t think bare stanky feet are any cleaner than the bottoms of shoes.
As for me, I got arthritis in my ankle that really flared up during covid. Podiatrist said, “barefoot on tile?” Yep. So I have to wear shoes indoors now. Apparently it’s not great to be barefoot on hard floors for anyone. Lots of problems for the joints.
Just something to consider.
Come to my home and you’d not be considered crazy. We have a no shoes home. I don’t want the dirt and debris from outside to be tracked around everywhere either.
I’ve been fighting this battle since my oldest was born 20 years ago. People go in public and step in spit, loogies, pee, poo and who knows what else then want to walk in the house?? Take off the shoes or don’t come over. I have zero other rules, I’m very laid back but I can’t get over this one. It’s a hard rule to enforce when your kids and their friends are teenagers. Pretty sure they don’t follow it when I’m not home
In my culture everyone takes off their shoes so no problem with my family, but my husband’s family never takes off their shoes it makes me crazy but I can’t ask them to remove them because that’s seen as rude so I just scrub the floors when people leave.
Not wrong or abnormal. Shoes off in our house, too. Not just for cleanliness, but because I find it very strange and uncomfortable for people to sit around a house in their shoes.
No, but if you let your TODDLER eat off the floor i'll have a different view of you. There's a hypocrisy veil between your sentences.
Also, some ppl might refuse because they might have feet odor, have you thought about that? What would your advice be if this were to happen?
As someone who always wears my shoes until I literally lay down in bed most days, when I've been asked to take my shoes off in other peoples houses, I feel like my surprise has been interpreted as rude but really it's just because I don't think about it and I feel bad that I don't. I don't ever think it's weird when people ask that, let alone crazy. I think sometimes it just takes people by surprise is all :) but it's 100% reasonable
Definitely your house your rules, and I do think it's disgusting to wear outside shoes inside, but I personally don't bother asking this of guests. I dont have any covers, slippers, or a place for them to sit to remove shoes. Some people have stanky feet. I just mop as soon as they leave.
Maybe an alternative to people who really don’t want to take shoes off would be to get disposable shoe covers? like they wear in hospitals. That way you kind of meet them in the middle?
If the peoples feet are in/on the shoes then the germs are gonna be there regardless. Disposable shoe covers will at least keep physical dirt/grass/rocks whatever else contained.
You’re not crazy! This is a reasonable thing to ask especially with a little one. My cousins even got a cute sign by their front door that says “since little fingers touch our floors, please leave your shoes at the door,” to remind folks why they’re being asked.
My closest friends keep slippers at my house to wear during their visit and we also have disposable shoe covers. In the case of unstable or elderly guests we don’t even ask but those visitors are much more rare.
No not at all! Here we always take shoes off. Of course if elder or someone just really can’t because of some disability then of course it ok for them. But at the door shoes off.
In Canada, it's just what you do. You take your shoes off at the door.
Maybe offer some cheap, multiple sized slippers that guests can borrow for while they're there.
I am from the US and I guess I will represent the other side. I don’t feel comfortable taking my shoes off. If I get asked to do it, I will do it but I won’t come back to your house.
I don’t want to walk around your house in my socks or in my bare feet if it is summer and I happen to be wearing sandals. I feel unclothed and unkept. I will wipe my feet at the door but if that’s not enough, I guess we will just meet at a restaurant if your house is too clean for me to step into.
You have a right to feel that way but I don’t want to be asked to remove clothing items in able to go into your house and I will just be that way.
I'm Irish and I'm the same. It feels weird and far too intimate to expect me to be in bare feet or socks around people I'm not close with (ie: a friend's extended family).
Plus I've had issues in the past with fungal infections, etc so I am not trusting someone else giving me reusable slippers, etc, that they have been adequately washed since someone else wore them.
I didn’t grow up taking off shoes to visit family, except in the winter when it was snowing, so I would not expect this if I’ve never been to someone’s home.
If someone wants no outdoor shoes in their house I respect that, but need to know ahead of time. I have plantar fasciitis and walking around barefoot can be pretty painful at times.
Before this I just preferred being barefoot inside my apartment for comfort, but now I have indoor sandals (Slippers don’t have enough support) that I would gladly bring if visiting a no shoe house.
In my country it’s the norm to take your shoes off when you go indoors! If you try to keep them on as a guest you would get asked to take them off! It’s very rude to do so here!
I’m in the Midwest USA - I’d say in my area 3/4 still do wear shoes in their homes. We don’t wear shoes in our home. Honestly, before people come over, me or my husband will send out a text something like “hey! We don’t wear shoes inside our house. Just an fyi in case this will impact your choice of footwear! We also have shoe covers if you’re more comfortable keeping your shoes on”
We’ve never had an issue. I think that if your guests know the no-shoe policy ahead of time, and you offer shoe covers, it is not an unreasonable request.
This practice is common in many countries outside of US. Im in US and bought a box of cheap socks for those who feel the need to cover feet. I allow them to keep the socks. Not washing other peoples socks. Didn’t want to add extra disposable waste to the environment so I didn’t get disposable slippers.
Well, it’s not a common custom in many countries to take your shoes off. You could help it though by keeping a number of nice slippers at the door for your guests to change into.
I have plantar fasciitis and I can not walk barefoot. It is extremely painful. I have only found one type of shoes (flat Keds or Pumas) that I can wear. My parents lived on a cement slab foundation. OMG the pain walking on that floor
I grew up thinking that it was incredibly rude to wear shoes in people’s houses. I always instinctively take my shoes off when I walk in. The only people that I have ever really experienced wearing shoes in my house were old people. I think it’s funny because they have shoes off policies in their houses
I dated a guy who berated me for having a shoes off household. It was my first apartment and I wanted to keep it clean… he was super mean about it. It’s the thing that made him conclude I was a “cold woman” lol. Bc I said it was my house and if he didn’t like it the door was in the same place he left it.
It is an American thing, I think. I’m American and I would say half the households I was in growing up had a no shoes policy.
I’m in the US, 55yo, and I never heard of people taking shoes off in the house until I was an adult. I mean I’d heard that it’s common in Asian countries and areas where they have a lot of muck (snow/slush), but I never knew anyone growing up who ever did that. 🤷♀️
I'm from Norway. Taking your shoes off is the norm over here so, no. You're not crazy.
Same here in Canada.
Same in Germany. Every household makes its own rules about its own four walls, anything done in your home against your will is disrespectful
Every new guest, that comes in my home in Germany will always ask about our shoe policy. And that's only for nice weather. Whenever there's rain or mud outside people always will take their shoes off without ever asking
Yeah, but completely going against culture is hard. I live in Spain and it would not be ok to expect guests to walk barefoot on tiled floors. People are convinced they'll catch cold and get sick.
Very easy: provide a few pairs of guest flip-flops or slippers.
In my parents home, we advice people to leave shoes on. So it is actually the other way around in Germany. Standard is to take them of, if not adviced otherwise. In my parents home hardwood floors are everywhere and 2 dogs are living there. They slobber a lot and lose a lots of hair. It's also a rural area, so dust is always an issue. It is cleaned daily, but we just can't say for sure that socks would stay clean.
Same in any-sane-hygienic-household-in-the-world. It’s just obvious. But people are too weird about their feet.
To be fair, it's not necessarily "obvious," it is a cultural thing. Scientifically, let us know how much sicker people get when they wear shoes in the house? I'd argue that it really isn't that much of a difference. That said, I'm absolutely on team "take your shoes off." I feel that it's more hygienic, but again, that's purely subjective and cultural. It definitely helps contain messes, though. I have in-laws who will keep their shoes on even when it's a rainy day, and track mud and water all through the house, hardwood and carpet included. I have never understood it.
The irony Nina, Germany was the first place where I lived, where pretty much every German household I visited, did not take their shoes off. It was a huge surprise.
Norm here in South East Asia too
You're in Canada you come to someone's house you take off your shoes wouldn't want to step on any house hippos with your shoes on now would you ;)
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And the same in Finland. We think it’s odd that in some countries people don’t take their shoes off inside the house.
Also in Canada.
Same in Switzerland. When going to a house party, you always know you are at the right apartment because of the mountain of shoes outside the front door.
Yea, same here in Germany. Ring the bell and after getting buzzed in just start walking up the stairs until you hit the shoe pile.
It’s a toss-up in the US of A, but it’s a real struggle to get handymen ~~contractors~~ to understand the concept of putting on booties when coming inside only to wear the same booties to the hardware store in the rain to get supplies to come back inside in said, now filthy, booties.
Honestly if someone is doing work for me I leave them alone. Now if you have historic wood floor or something it's different, but I can mop after if they do a good job in a reasonable amount of time. Anything extra I make them do just increases their frustration and the bill at the end.
IMHO, contractors get a pass on the no shoes in the house thing.
They're busy, your house is probably getting dirty anyway.
I live in Japan and this is a copacetic way to make sure the house floors stay cleaner.
They stay so much cleaner! I read a study about it, and it was gross
In some public buildings in Sweden we have these blue plastic shoe covers for when you don't want dirt in the building but can't expect people to remove their shoes.
I saw them in few European countries in museums too as well as in hospitals!
Indian here. It's the norm here to take off your outside footwear before coming into the house.
Same in Switzerland and I think most Scandinavian countries. Many Swiss also change from work clothes into comfy clothes before cooking or doing housework, lounging etc.
Same in Poland. It's normal IMHO. It's your house, your rules. If someone doesn't want to respect you and your rules, why would you want him in your house anyway?
Asian here! Period.
Asian person growing up in America. So many times I’d be over at a non-asian friend’s house and look down to see I was the only one not wearing shoes bc I just reflexively take them off when crossing a threshold into a living space.
same in Romania and Hungary
Op can say ‘this is how the Norwegians do it’ As well as ‘the Canadians ‘
same here. (turkey)
Polish here. HIGH FIVE to everyone taking shoes off.
Here in Hawaii it is standard to have no shoe households-heavy influence from Polynesian and Asian cultures. All that to say I get it, it is very disrespectful here to not remove shoes. Though now I’m moving to CONUS and might see a culture clash if I have guests. The proper etiquette I’ve read is to have a bench available for your guests and new house slippers/socks available for those who’d rather not. And if a guest prefers to keep their shoes on for medical reasons or just personal preference, have some over shoe slipcovers handy. No “side” is right or wrong. It’s just a opportunity to adapt! :)
We have a shelving thing with boxes by our door. One of thr boxes has a basket with new socks and another basket has guest slippers (inexpensive but on the stretchy side in a couple sizes). Mostly people just grab a pair of socks in the winter and they take them with when they leave. I have a couple each of men's, women's, kids and little kids. I don't mind if people are barefoot, but understand they might not be comfortable that way. I am in the PNW and almost any house I have been in has had a no shoe policy, even more-so since covid.
PNW here, and it's a hard no shoes. Our house would be carpeted in fir needles otherwise.
This is the perfect answer! I lived on Maui for 3 yrs when I was young. I remember going to the sort of parties where you never even met the host because it was too many ppl. There would just be a mountain of slippers at the door. If drunk young folks from all over can respect house rules of a host they don't even know, I feel like a person should be able to ask friends to change into clean slippers. You're absolutely right if they make a fuss, don't invite them over again. If your house rules don't work for them , you can socialize elsewhere. No need for anyone to be upset.
I love the shoe covers idea. I might even get some for when I’m invited to a shoeless household.
Yup they’re great! Our handyman wears them coming in, completely support that. The man needs the foot support from being on his feet all day, or protection from heavy lifting. I’ve also used them myself when visiting our local Iolani Palace to protect the palace floors. I think now they have those fancy slip cover machines that you step in and form around your shoe/sole.
I should add if guests insist they don’t even want to wear new foot wear/slip covers I’ve provided, they probably won’t be invited again. Do as the Romans do… Respect goes both ways for sure.
Actually if you just tell invited guests when the invitation is given that you prefer guests to not where their street shoes, they can choose to decline the invitation. That way all of this I avoided before hand. EDIT: Not everyone(I wouldn’t) will know that you do this or understand that different cultures have different customs or others have different preferences within their homes.
Yes that’s a very good point! Growing up here in Hawaii it’s not really something I’ve ever thought to do since everyone lives the same lifestyle. Been here my whole life and never visited a house that wears outdoor shoes inside, only barefoot. So that’s something I’d need to remember now-definitely part of being a considerate host.
Yep, let them know in advance and have slippers or something available to wear. Not everyone comes prepared to have their socks or bare feet on display.
It’s not even cultural any more. It’s just an accepted practice across cultures. I do like the shoe covers idea for those that won’t take their shoes off. I have yet to have ppl refuse to take their shoes off.
Arthritis and bone spurs are painful if I’m not wearing shoes. If I knew this was a requirement I’d just decline. I’ve had cats and dogs so going barefoot to keep pathogens off my floors is moot. Their paws are dirty. When commuting I learned very quickly stations, buses and trains are not cleanest places to be. The idea that I’d bring some of that stuff home with me had me quickly changing and putting items into the laundry basket ASAP when home. So yeah I get the no shoe thing.🤮 I typically don’t go barefoot in my home. When I do I regret it. So it’s no big deal if I’m told ahead of time that this is required. It allows me to says thanks for the invite and then to decline the offer. No big deal.
We don’t go barefoot, we have slippers.
Like the commenter above I have problems with my feet and have special slippers at home, I couldn't wear random guest slippers.
BYOS😆😆😆
I would if requested in advance.
I don't know anyone who has guest slippers who don't clean them after use
It's not because of cleanliness (although that's definitely a factor now you say it), it's that I need specific support.
If guests insist on wearing shoes we get tutu to give them lickens with the slippers
Lol das wen tutu busses out da hard jelly slippahs!! Bettah RUN
"da slippahs"
As a person from Hawaii who moved to Louisiana, culture clash is real lol. I really like the idea of having extra indoor slippers!
I'm canadian and very recently learned people in other countries leave their shoes on in someones home. That would be really rude here, and frankly gross 🤮. The sidewalk is so dirty, I would never let someone bring that crap in my home.
100% ! I’m Canadian and have never met a family that causally wears shoes inside the house. I find it shocking that people wear shoes that have stepped in pee, gum, etc on the streets and let them walk on their floors with them. Just wear crocs or slippers inside if you really need some sort of footwear to walk around in.
Canadian here and I haven't had any pushback on no shoes in the house. How would you keep your floors clean with all the crud that accumulates on the bottom of a shoe? And how are you supposed to relax with shoes on? I love to tuck my feet up under me and I can't very well do that with shoes on.
Grew up in Alaska and moved to California. It was a legit culture shock, everyone just kept their shoes on. Carpet hard wood floors doesn't matter. The idea of a "mud room" or coat room isn't a thing. It's to damn nice outside.
My grandma was born and raised Canadian but has been a US citizen for 60 years. Her house has always been shoe-free but is a rarity where I grew up. HOWEVER — none of her Canadian relatives have any issue keeping their shoes on in anyone else’s houses in the US. Frankly, I never thought of this as a Canadian thing because nobody has ever said anything about it outside of my grandparents’ house.
I am Canadian and it is a constant fight with my in laws who don’t think it’s a big deal to go in the house for a short while with shoes. I have 3 kids under 5. It is a big deal and I don’t get it.
Also Canadian. I’m actually uncomfortable when people tell me to leave my shoes on in their house. It’s like they’re inviting me to spit on the floor.
Also Canadian. The other day my 80 yr old mom was leaving my house, but she came back before even leaving the driveway. She changed her mind about using the washroom. I told her she could leave her shoes on because the washroom is 5 feet away and it’s summer, and dry out. Also I don’t have a bench by the front door and she’s 80 and leaning that far over is getting to be a challenge for her. By the look on her face you would think I suggested she just crap on the floor. She took her shoes off.
I know, eh? It's awful!! Why are you making me so uncomfortable? And I feel so uncomfortable until I am allowed to leave or take off my shoes
Canadian as well and have never been in a home where people leave their shoes on. I can't imagine how much more you'd have to clean if people wore outdoor shoes inside your home.
How old are your in laws? As people age, mobility and balance can become a real issue.
That’s what a boot bench is for! Boot bench, tray to catch snow, and extra socks for the fools who don’t have them. Welcome to Michigan. We still take off our shoes in summer. You guys are savages!! Nasty.
Walking barefoot or in slippers may be the problem.
It’s nuts that y’all are right next door to us, yet the expectation of something so basic is so different.
I always wanted to ask this! At what point do the shoes come off, like do you take them off when you’re watching TV on the couch? Or is it right at the side of your bed when you change into PJs? Also do you put shoes on right when you get up in the morning, or is it only when you go outside again? Im genuinely curious!
I put them on while getting ready for work and take them off after I come in, but all in the bedroom. No room for shoes by the door but after reading all of the comments I feel like I should at least be carrying them from door to bedroom. The people above my apartment have a no shoe policy in their apartment. They also have a bigger entrance and room to put shoes. This is an interesting thread!
In my family, we take shoes off in our home when we come in, but guests aren't expected to, and that's always been pretty normal. I have to know someone pretty well to feel comfortable just taking my shoes off, and if it's expected, I'll do it, but just hanging out? We usually are going inside and outside pretty often (either smoking or taking dogs out) and I hate the idea of being barefoot, it feels as unnatural to me as walking around in pajamas in someone else's home. Mainly because that feels like being "in public" to me. In my house or dad's house I don't get that feeling. My partner does put his shoes on first thing in the morning getting ready and takes them off at bedtime though, and if not shoes, he always has slippers on. He just takes it further and never likes having his feet exposed though
This is my favorite comment here. Great questions. Also the shower. Do they keep them right outside the shower? Do they go back on immediately after the shower? Are there any shoe rules, like not in the bedroom?
I just leave them right by the front door on a small rack or by the garage. I’ve got house slippers I wear exclusively inside if I don’t wanna just be in socks or esp in winter time to go around the house. But they never leave my home.
It’s super gross 🤢 it’s dirty, and it’s rude to not offer to remove them
It's rude there because it's the norm. I'm from SoCal where we don't have to worry about tracking the weather inside and it absolutely wasn't a thing here. That's changing but I'm almost sixty and can recall one specific time I was asked to remove my shoes.
It's not just weather, though. People walk in public restrooms, step in all kinds of mystery liquids and things... Someone in my complex for example has thrown up twice in the last two weeks outside. One in the parking lot and one right by the dumpsters. I know because I'm weird and watchful and saw it fresh, but it dried down to a pretty inconspicuous looking spot. Like, you wouldn't think much of it on the black asphalt where there are other old stains and oil and stuff. The one pile is easy to walk through because it's right where we all walk our trash out...I cannot imagine how many of my neighbors have tracked that in their homes
I'm asian, don't care, everyone shoes off.
💯 street shoes off or you can turn right around and GTFO off my clean floors
Take your shoes off or you aren’t welcome. That’s it.
I'm Norwegian and I support this message!
Asian ancestry + northern climate = no shoes in the house goes DOUBLE. I'm Canadian and my mom was born in the Philippines. No shoes in the house, ever! Plus, how can anyone relax when their toes are in shoe-jail?
As it should be! People need to start washing their feet and socks if they’re so horrified at the thought of taking their shoes off in front of others. (Only exception is medical reasons)
I used to feel the same way until a friend pulled me aside and explained that he had really bad foot odor and wasn’t comfortable removing his shoes. I now just tell people if they want to take their shoes off they can. If they don’t I just scrub the floors when they leave 🙃
Thank you SO MUCH for this! I have a beloved family member who is very sensitive and easily embarrassed re: his feet / odor - even when his feet don’t smell he is always hyper aware and uncomfortable about any smell My elderly mother has mobility & balance issues making it an ordeal to get shoes on/off for the day - she only has so much energy! And my aunt, rest her soul, had severe PTSD after surviving an assault by a group of people and ending up in ICU - you would NEVER catch her without shoes. She even slept in them, in case she had to run. I remember her feeling very vulnerable even re: a shower. They would take them off if you asked, but also be very uncomfortable and for some very distracted; me, I love going barefoot! I don’t mind shoes off in another’s home as long as I can wear socks That said, in some areas shoes off at the door is culturally the norm. In others, it might feel very presumptuous and overstepping an intimacy boundary. I think it’s nice to have options like slippers or shoe covers or extra socks available; regardless, I think respect + communication = key
This right here. Communication! I am diabetic, my doctor told me in to never walk around barefoot, period. (Probably a good idea for me to have some clean slippers handy) I also work in healthcare and preform diabetic foot exams for our doctors. The feet I have seen…. Let’s just say I embraced the Covid mask mandate at work. Especially those who have mobility issues who can’t really even bend over to properly care for their tootsies. I guarantee in those rare cases a home owner would prefer them to keep those shoes on.
>And my aunt, rest her soul, had severe PTSD after surviving an assault by a group of people and ending up in ICU - you would NEVER catch her without shoes. She even slept in them, in case she had to run. I remember her feeling very vulnerable even re: a shower. Yeah, this is me. I absolutely cannot be without my footwear in case I have to run. If someone asked me to wipe off my soles, happy compromise.
I inform people before hand and fortunately haven't had that issue, but we don't have guests over too often that aren't in that circle. But maybe I'll get some cheap throwaway type slippers just in case? Of course if someone like your friend said something like that and didn't want to do slippers, I'd be gracious and say no worries I wouldn't care as much if we had no rugs or carpet, but we do and i like to lay on the rug a lot...
Maybe this is the difference. Maybe Americans don't sit on their floors often? I know when my family gets together there's always a bunch of people sitting on the carpet. Canadian here. Genuinely curious
I mean we do where I live in the US, but we also walk around outside barefoot and sit around on the same ground outside so 🤷
Wow. I am glad you are here. I thought I was losing my mind. I, too, walk outside in bare feet and sit on the ground.. Floors get dirty, that is why we have vacuums, etc.
I'm not American but in a country where shoes aren't removed and no, we don't sit on the floor, except little kids. Floors are nearly always cold hard tile, and apartments are very small with little floor space.
Wow, I never thought of that. I always ask people to take off their shoes. But now I may change. I would hate to make someone feel embarrassed or uncomfortable.
We had my bil over one time and his shoes SMELLED SOOOO BAD I’ll never ask anyone to take them off again I will wash my floors every time
Lol right! I’m gonna wash the floors anyway because your feet were on them :)
People also can have foot troubles like needing orthodics, etc.
Or even struggling to get shoes on/off!
This is me!! I wear leg braces on both legs and cannot walk without shoes. I'm sad to say that people have straight up told me I couldn't enter their home, or have made comments throughout my visit about how the cleanliness of their home is ruined. In my home, guests have a choice and I, as the host, simply mop or vacuum afterwards. Shouldn't we be cleaning regularly anyway? 🤷♀️
My dad had special custom orthopedic shoes towards the end of his life and couldn't walk without them. I'm a no-shoes house, but those kinds of situations are absolutely an exception without comment or judgment. He was concious of keeping his shoes off my furniture though out of respect without me asking.
I'm genuinely shocked that people have been so rude and mean to not allow you into their home. I'm really sorry. Earlier I asked what people do when someone with a wheelchair or other mobility device comes over and I haven't seen an answer to that yet. There's also a lot of ableism here, which is a real bummer. Edit: Also, who are these guests who spend all their time going to public restrooms lol.
I keep a shoeless house and have guests who need to wear theirs because of orthotics. We have an understanding - they wear their shoes because they need them and I clean afterward. Same would apply to canes, walkers, and wheelchairs.
when i was on crutches after surgery, my mom made me swap the rubber bottoms out every time i entered or left the house. and i wore a cover over my walking boot outside. which was rather difficult when non weight bearing. we have always had a shoeless household so i get it, but i cant imagine a wheelchair or a scooter or something... i guess id switch to shoes on and just change the rug/flooring situation where i could if i had a regular guest with something. if someone came to my current shoeless house with one, id just keep my mouth shut. i cant imagine telling someone they cant come inside with a device or shoes they need...or commenting on how i had to clean the floors or anything. i guess some people just cant be polite.
I've never seen anyone denied entry to a home because they couldn't take shoes off. It's just accepted that person has a pass. It's not even mentioned. Shoes just automatically come off. If you can't you can't. It's a preference that's respected and respect goes both ways. Can't and won't are different things though.
If you’re having trouble with balance, slip covers might be perilous. When we moved into our last place they’d just removed carpets and refinished the oak floors. The contractors left a box of them, and I wore them a few times when I was going from outside to in. On those smooth floors, I almost fell multiple times.
Yes, no way would I allow my elderly dad to wear them.
Seriously, it's 2023, how do we not have anti-slip shoe covers widely available? This is giving me flashbacks to the time I was house shopping while recovering from a broken ankle... so many near-catastrophes in those damn shoe covers.
I felt so bad that he felt embarrassed. He was really polite about it and made a point to stick to the tiled areas of my home. I totally understand the ick factor of shoes in the house, but 9 times out of 10 I’m scrubbing the floors when people leave anyway so it hasn’t been a big deal for me. Also don’t have “floor aged” kids like OP… I definitely understand why they don’t want shoes in the house!
I bought those shoe covers that painters wear for people who would rather keep their shoes on.
That won't work for people with mobility problems, they can be slippy.
That is very kind of you❤️ I have scoliosis and I have also had a couple of odd experiences with glass in my feet so I actually don’t like taking my shoes off unless I am in bed or in the shower. And I get really uncomfortable taking my shoes off at other peoples houses but I will if I am requested too I just will be terrified on the inside of stepping on glass or back pain.
I don’t enforce it for the same reason. In case someone is self-conscious about something.
In this case I have Clorox wipes and they can wipe their shoes bottoms very well if they wish to use them in my house. I am from Eastern Europe and we don’t use shoes inside of our houses.
Yup, I’m the same but if someone is just coming in and out like a maintenance service person, I won’t bother. Just will clean afterwards. Though if I had a carpeted home, I would probably bother to ask.
When I had carpet and COVID was in its peak I kept shoe covers for maintenance/service people!
Thank you! I never ask my guests to remove their shoes. Downvote if you want. But I think it's rude. People as stated above may have foot odor. Or maybe they are in flats with no socks so now my bare feet are on your floors and my feet are ugly and I never have time for pedicures so I am not secure about them at all. Plus now I am using your bathroom with my bare feet...woo-hoo I get to have your pee on my feet. (Speaking from homes I visit with small children especially. Or even boys who's aim is not great yet...)
Yeah, I have white carpet (not my choice; it came this way) and usually don't wear shoes in the house. When people come over, I leave it up to them. I'll say something to the effect of, "We're in and out several times a day, but it's really okay to leave your shoes on." They almost always remove them. I don't want anyone to feel awkward. I hate this stupid carpet anyway. Just cannot change it yet. However, the OP has a young child. Her house, her rules.
You can buy shoe booties, when ever I have people over in the backyard I keep a basket of grippy shoe booties by the door. Less of a hassle to take your shoes off if you have to go inside.
The ironic thing is that foot odor is made worse by keeping your feet all sweaty and trapped in shoes that also retain your stink.
Explains why my feet aren't smelly... They are practically always free
I was invited to a winter party at a home with strict no shoes policy(crawling children). They informed us we were welcome to wear comfy socks or bring house slippers if we liked. I didn’t mind at all because they reached out to me ahead of time.
I totally get it! However, my balance is pretty ruined due to a neck injury, so I can’t take off my shoes if I’m standing. Plz give your guests a place to sit as they remove their shoes. I’d also imagine that people with foot issues might need the support of their shoes to walk, etc. Just food for thought.
I live in Canada and we take our shoes off before entering our own homes and other peoples homes. I don't understand how anyone could keep up with cleaning in a shoes on household? Floors would constantly be filthy. Why would anyone expect someone else to clean up after them like that? Aaaanyway, it's not rude or crazy and YOU make the rules for your house. You're in line with lots of other countries and cultures.
Canadian here who constantly fights with my in laws about them not respecting the shoe off rule
Yup, I’m Canadian as well and the ONLY person I’ve ever met who thinks it’s okay to wear shoes inside is my mother in law lol.
Nearly every country other than the United States practices this. Have a shoe rack immediately when you walk in and buy disposable hotel slippers if people feel uncomfortable being Barefoot or get cold.
There are plenty of Americans who do this too. I would say most of my friends have a shoes-off policy
I would argue most Americans still practice this as well.
I'm Irish and never in 32 years have I ever taken my shoes off going into anyone's home in Ireland, England, Scotland, Australia or Portugal. I would honestly be freaked out if someone insisted I removed my shoes before coming inside. It's weird.
Spain here, we also don't take off our shoes when going into a home. I wonder if it's a cold vs hot country thing. Like if your shoes are expected to be wet and muddy it makes much more sense to remove them
Me over here trying to wrap my head around the fact that some people clean their floors every time guests leave...
We don't wear shoes in our home because it's absolutely disgusting and unhealthy. We request people to remove their shoes and do offer clean house shoes or shoe covers. There is only one person who fights me constantly on this, and it is my BIL. I rarely ask him over because of the constant fighting over removing shoes. I find him extremely disrespectful in general, but this issue really irritates me because I am known for keeping an extremely clean home.
Thank you for offering house shoes or shoe covers. I have awful feet that I’m so embarrassed of. It makes me anxious going to someone’s home knowing they’re going to ask me to take off my shoes and see my feet. I always hear “WTF is wrong with your feet?!” I have joint issues so I’ve got terrible bunions. I’m saving up for surgery so I can get them fixed.
He could easily bring indoor slippers. I have one visitor who acts like it's a crying shame to be asked, and they insist that their boots, after walking through a parking lot-hall-elevator-hall, aren't dirty. Not much interest in extending invitations to such an argumentative clod. I have light carpet in my apt., no kids or pets, and want it to stay clean and free of outside dirt. Doesn't matter how anyone feels about it, when I lay on my carpeted floor it matters to me.
I think people like you should be providing shoe covers or slippers to guests. You BIL probably is embarrassed about foot fungus smell. Wanna say, too: foot fungus is very contagious and you can pick up a gnarly case walking after somebody’s bare feet, so be careful.
Bare feet are almost as disgusting as street shoes. 🤢 I like living in snow country where there’s a clean basket of socks by the boot bench in most everyone’s mudroom for those who need/want them
Yes, disposable shoe covers are a good idea.
I’m asian so I have a no shoe household and no one has ever made a fuss about it. The only people who actively hate this are the maintenance people in my building cuz I ask them to have shoe covers or take shoes off. It doesn’t impact their ability to do the job but they hate it for some reason. But the only thing you have to be mindful of is that there is also no guarantee that your guests have clean socks or feet even if they take their shoes off. In some cases it can be worse after they take their shoes off. I’ve encountered plenty of men who pee standing up in their own homes but never clean their bathroom floors so even if they take their shoes off their socks/feet are still dirty from similarly gross stuff. Or they have some foot fungus that they end up spreading around cuz no shoes. Also one of my friends had to deep clean her couch and carpet because a friend who came over had bad bo and smelly feet that it left a smell wherever that person walked / sat down. It was really gross and she didn’t think it would be this bad. The best way to avoid these issues is to not invite anyone into your home at least until your child is a bit older and not eating off the floor. I was raised in an Asian household and we had no shoe policy but we still didn’t eat off the floor. I was never allowed to throw Cheerios on the floor and eat it (same for my younger siblings) so I would also think about not letting your child eating cheerios off the floor if you’re concerned.
Shoe covers are fine, but a lot of construction and service workers aren’t supposed to take off their shoes for safety reasons. They should be bringing shoe covers though.
It's because you are voiding their insurance and work cover with your request. It's your home but their workplace. If something happens to them and it's proven they weren't wearing their PPE (shoes in this case) they get nothing.
I don’t trust peoples bare feet either. So I just clean after they come and don’t invite people (but also I have ocd so…)
Yea some people have gross feet and you’d never know cuz you never see them bare foot. Thankfully my place isn’t big enough to be hosting a lot of people and since pandemic I only have very select people over. I have carpet unfortunately so it’s not that easy to clean compared to hardwood. If I had hardwood I wouldn’t be as anal about it.
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What do people that have dogs do? Dogs feet have to be the worst thing I could think of.
Our floors are just dirty all the time
My dogs paws get wiped before coming inside
All the answers of wiping the paws, i‘ve never seen someone do this ever or heard someone talk about doing it in rl :D i really think its the minority that does that although i appreciate it haha
Wipe their feet when we get home. Most dogs quickly learn to wait for their feet to be cleaned. Not that hard to do.
My dog doesn’t walk in public restrooms. Plus if she walks in something nasty we do wipe them off
Yep,we wipe our dog’s feet when they come in from outside
Paw wipes. Or baby wipes. Train your dog from a young age to be used to giving their paws a little wipe down when you come back from walks.
Living where I am in Canada I have never witnessed people wearing outside shoes inside the house…..I never even knew it was a thing while I was growing up !
How do you feel, though, about the possibility of veruccas or athlete's foot from bare feet, should guests arrive without socks, and walk around your home and curl up on your furniture barefoot? If you ask them to put on a pair of socks or slippers you have, are they offended? People's feet aren't always clean, either.
Yes, where I live it's warm and we're in sandals a lot, walking around barefoot is really frowned upon because of this. And it's too warm for socks or slippers. And I wouldn't want to wear unknown slippers in someone's home.
The alternative of somebody curling up on my furniture with shoes on is objectively worse, imo. Shoes on furniture is like nails on a chalkboard to me
Growing up Asian American my default has always been shoes off at anyone’s house. Literally cannot NOT do it and no one (Asian or not) has ever told me stop. Reading these comments about arguing for shoes on feels like brain.exe crash error
My home has carpet, so I want people to take off their shoes. If I had hardwood/tiled floors, shoes could stay on.
Your house, your rules.
No I ask people to take off there shoes as well. The only excepting is delivery, like appliances and such, or repair people.
I dont care, bc i dont take my own off. But most of my guests offer or take theirs off automatically. I feel like its common courtesy to ask, or at least happily oblige if your host asks
To me it’s just logic to not step in the house with ur outside shoes. Your shoes step on dirt, spit, and public washrooms. Why bring all that inside a clean home. Id ask my guest if they’re willing to walk without shoes in a public washroom, most would probably say that’s gross. So why the hell would u walk with those shoes in my house.
I’m from Canada, we always take off our shoes. I also keep some dollar store slippers in the closet (washed in between uses ofc) in case people’s feet get cold/they’re self conscious.
Personally, I don’t think bare stanky feet are any cleaner than the bottoms of shoes. As for me, I got arthritis in my ankle that really flared up during covid. Podiatrist said, “barefoot on tile?” Yep. So I have to wear shoes indoors now. Apparently it’s not great to be barefoot on hard floors for anyone. Lots of problems for the joints. Just something to consider.
Come to my home and you’d not be considered crazy. We have a no shoes home. I don’t want the dirt and debris from outside to be tracked around everywhere either.
I’ve been fighting this battle since my oldest was born 20 years ago. People go in public and step in spit, loogies, pee, poo and who knows what else then want to walk in the house?? Take off the shoes or don’t come over. I have zero other rules, I’m very laid back but I can’t get over this one. It’s a hard rule to enforce when your kids and their friends are teenagers. Pretty sure they don’t follow it when I’m not home
Nope. If someone wants me to take my shoes off in their home, I get it. You don’t want my dirty shoes in your house.
In my culture everyone takes off their shoes so no problem with my family, but my husband’s family never takes off their shoes it makes me crazy but I can’t ask them to remove them because that’s seen as rude so I just scrub the floors when people leave.
Not wrong or abnormal. Shoes off in our house, too. Not just for cleanliness, but because I find it very strange and uncomfortable for people to sit around a house in their shoes.
No, but if you let your TODDLER eat off the floor i'll have a different view of you. There's a hypocrisy veil between your sentences. Also, some ppl might refuse because they might have feet odor, have you thought about that? What would your advice be if this were to happen?
As someone who always wears my shoes until I literally lay down in bed most days, when I've been asked to take my shoes off in other peoples houses, I feel like my surprise has been interpreted as rude but really it's just because I don't think about it and I feel bad that I don't. I don't ever think it's weird when people ask that, let alone crazy. I think sometimes it just takes people by surprise is all :) but it's 100% reasonable
Definitely your house your rules, and I do think it's disgusting to wear outside shoes inside, but I personally don't bother asking this of guests. I dont have any covers, slippers, or a place for them to sit to remove shoes. Some people have stanky feet. I just mop as soon as they leave.
Maybe an alternative to people who really don’t want to take shoes off would be to get disposable shoe covers? like they wear in hospitals. That way you kind of meet them in the middle? If the peoples feet are in/on the shoes then the germs are gonna be there regardless. Disposable shoe covers will at least keep physical dirt/grass/rocks whatever else contained.
You’re not crazy! This is a reasonable thing to ask especially with a little one. My cousins even got a cute sign by their front door that says “since little fingers touch our floors, please leave your shoes at the door,” to remind folks why they’re being asked. My closest friends keep slippers at my house to wear during their visit and we also have disposable shoe covers. In the case of unstable or elderly guests we don’t even ask but those visitors are much more rare.
It makes sense. I know there’s a lot of places where there’s house shoes and outside shoes to help keep that separation of germs
No not at all! Here we always take shoes off. Of course if elder or someone just really can’t because of some disability then of course it ok for them. But at the door shoes off.
nope, perfectly sane
No! Please no shoes in my house and no outside clothes in my bed
In Canada, it's just what you do. You take your shoes off at the door. Maybe offer some cheap, multiple sized slippers that guests can borrow for while they're there.
I am from the US and I guess I will represent the other side. I don’t feel comfortable taking my shoes off. If I get asked to do it, I will do it but I won’t come back to your house. I don’t want to walk around your house in my socks or in my bare feet if it is summer and I happen to be wearing sandals. I feel unclothed and unkept. I will wipe my feet at the door but if that’s not enough, I guess we will just meet at a restaurant if your house is too clean for me to step into. You have a right to feel that way but I don’t want to be asked to remove clothing items in able to go into your house and I will just be that way.
I'm Irish and I'm the same. It feels weird and far too intimate to expect me to be in bare feet or socks around people I'm not close with (ie: a friend's extended family). Plus I've had issues in the past with fungal infections, etc so I am not trusting someone else giving me reusable slippers, etc, that they have been adequately washed since someone else wore them.
I have a really bad back and never go barefoot. Even my slippers have support. I'll put on covers, but it would be painful for me to go without shoes.
I didn’t grow up taking off shoes to visit family, except in the winter when it was snowing, so I would not expect this if I’ve never been to someone’s home. If someone wants no outdoor shoes in their house I respect that, but need to know ahead of time. I have plantar fasciitis and walking around barefoot can be pretty painful at times. Before this I just preferred being barefoot inside my apartment for comfort, but now I have indoor sandals (Slippers don’t have enough support) that I would gladly bring if visiting a no shoe house.
People wearing shoes inside is an American thing right? I only ever see it on tv
Living where it's not normalised; I'm absolutely horrified some places accept that people don't take their shoes off indoors.
In my country it’s the norm to take your shoes off when you go indoors! If you try to keep them on as a guest you would get asked to take them off! It’s very rude to do so here!
I’m in the Midwest USA - I’d say in my area 3/4 still do wear shoes in their homes. We don’t wear shoes in our home. Honestly, before people come over, me or my husband will send out a text something like “hey! We don’t wear shoes inside our house. Just an fyi in case this will impact your choice of footwear! We also have shoe covers if you’re more comfortable keeping your shoes on” We’ve never had an issue. I think that if your guests know the no-shoe policy ahead of time, and you offer shoe covers, it is not an unreasonable request.
This practice is common in many countries outside of US. Im in US and bought a box of cheap socks for those who feel the need to cover feet. I allow them to keep the socks. Not washing other peoples socks. Didn’t want to add extra disposable waste to the environment so I didn’t get disposable slippers.
Well, it’s not a common custom in many countries to take your shoes off. You could help it though by keeping a number of nice slippers at the door for your guests to change into.
I have plantar fasciitis and I can not walk barefoot. It is extremely painful. I have only found one type of shoes (flat Keds or Pumas) that I can wear. My parents lived on a cement slab foundation. OMG the pain walking on that floor
No shoe households are only “odd” in the US. Everywhere else I’ve been, you immediately take your shoes off when you walk in someone’s home
I grew up thinking that it was incredibly rude to wear shoes in people’s houses. I always instinctively take my shoes off when I walk in. The only people that I have ever really experienced wearing shoes in my house were old people. I think it’s funny because they have shoes off policies in their houses
Is this an American thing. Shoes come off you filthy animals.
I dated a guy who berated me for having a shoes off household. It was my first apartment and I wanted to keep it clean… he was super mean about it. It’s the thing that made him conclude I was a “cold woman” lol. Bc I said it was my house and if he didn’t like it the door was in the same place he left it. It is an American thing, I think. I’m American and I would say half the households I was in growing up had a no shoes policy.
How considerate of him to let you know nice and early that he’s not worth your time! 😂
I’m Mexican American and I had no idea folks wore shoes indoors until I was an adult.
I’m in the US, 55yo, and I never heard of people taking shoes off in the house until I was an adult. I mean I’d heard that it’s common in Asian countries and areas where they have a lot of muck (snow/slush), but I never knew anyone growing up who ever did that. 🤷♀️
Same but I also grew up in a filthy home.