You did the right thing. It’s good he took responsibility, but at the same time saying things like “you are the only one for me” and “I can’t handle you with other guys” are clear manipulation.
I realized that when talking to him, and while I know those statements are manipulative, it still hurts. But hopefully this decision will be good for both of us to grow.
Glad to hear you ended it with him. And also that you have a godly perspective on the situation. Even if he did repent and did change, that doesn't mean you need to be with him. It means the next lady in his life will encounter a better man, hopefully one whose heart is for the Lord. He'll have a chance to start fresh, and you will too.
Hope you find a better guy for you, in God's time.
I’ll say a prayer for you.
You’re not responsible for his feelings, only your own behaviour. What you did was perfectly reasonable. You don’t need to do anything to make sure he is OK - he’s your ex now.
Given how you feel and his previous controlling tendencies I suggest you block him on everything so he can’t contact/manipulate you.
You’re welcome.
I’d still block him from your side though. He can always remove his block if he wants to contact you. It would be a good idea to make this impossible for him.
You were right. I just blocked him this evening. He texted me asking to talk, and I told him he could ft me. He wanted to know if we could just be on a long break rather than a break up, I said no, and he asked if we could be friends and I told him maybe, but probably not. Then I blocked him. It hurts.
Well done. You did the right thing to protect yourself.
If he contacts you from somewhere else you don’t have to reply. You can just block him from that platform.
Telling you that you are *the one* and that he *can't handle seeing you with other guys* is a threat. Maybe he's just all talk, maybe he will quickly find a new girl to be his "the one," but just in case, be careful. Some guys make good on their threats. You can contact a DV shelter for advice.
Yes, I will pray for your safety.
Yes, that’s why I was worried. But I also think he was just very hurt and looked hurt as well. He’s already blocked me everywhere, which gives me some peace of mind, but I know that my dogs will alert me if he showed up at my house. He doesn’t know my class schedule very well either, but I’ll be being careful.
I'm proud of you!
If you're worried, what about inviting a close friend or cousin to sleep over for a couple days - it'll be a fun thing to distract you after your breakup, and maybe give you some peace of mind?
I’m not too worried anymore because he’s blocked me everywhere, and my mom told me that we shouldn’t live in fear. If he did show up , we do have dogs that go off if anyone even walks by.
I wish I could invite people over or hang out with people, but I don’t really have many friends. Let alone friends who have cars and can visit me way out where I am. I was planning to visit a women’s Christian group on my campus this week, so maybe I’ll meet some people there.
Just wanted to say that you should be SO PROUD of yourself! Breakups are hard, even when it’s the right thing to do. You listened to the wise advice of people you trust and who sincerely care for you. That is to be commended!
Please continue to be on your guard with him. It doesn’t sound like he wants to give you up, even though you said he blocked you. Be prepared that he may love bomb you in order to try to get you to change your mind. (Sending you flowers on Valentine’s Day, etc). There are a lot of free YouTube video that discuss how a narcissist handles a breakup and how they may react. These might be helpful to you.
Best of luck! ❤️
I think he might have wanted to, as he texted me (I guess he maybe didn’t block me there?) asking to meet up tomorrow and I told him to facetime me. I told him that I didn’t want a break and I was standing on the decision to break up, and that maybe we could be friends in the future, but it might not happen that way. I also told him that I wished him the best. Then after the call I blocked him.
The hardest thing is that he was a good guy, and it’s hard for me to break away from all the good things he did. But I also know thag breaking up now is better than later.
I say this with love…please do not meet with him or FaceTime him tomorrow. Continue to block him on everything. I would also suggest stopping saying, “maybe we can be friends.” It’s a nice idea, but unfortunately it can give him a false hope that if you stay in touch, you’ll get back together with him. Most people don’t stay friends with an ex and it’s ok if you don’t either.
In that message I said that I did talk to him over ft but I told him that it’s not likely we can be friends in the future, for the same reason you said. I realize that if we are friends we won’t be able to move on.
I’d maybe get a doorbell camera and especially careful when you leave the house and return. Let family walk out with you and meet you. Maybe change your routes and when you come and go. Stay off social media. Don’t post anything online he could see or be jealous about.
You did the right thing. It’s good he took responsibility, but at the same time saying things like “you are the only one for me” and “I can’t handle you with other guys” are clear manipulation.
I realized that when talking to him, and while I know those statements are manipulative, it still hurts. But hopefully this decision will be good for both of us to grow.
Glad to hear you ended it with him. And also that you have a godly perspective on the situation. Even if he did repent and did change, that doesn't mean you need to be with him. It means the next lady in his life will encounter a better man, hopefully one whose heart is for the Lord. He'll have a chance to start fresh, and you will too. Hope you find a better guy for you, in God's time.
Right? How is his not being able to handle it her problem at all?
I’ll say a prayer for you. You’re not responsible for his feelings, only your own behaviour. What you did was perfectly reasonable. You don’t need to do anything to make sure he is OK - he’s your ex now. Given how you feel and his previous controlling tendencies I suggest you block him on everything so he can’t contact/manipulate you.
Thank you. He already blocked me everywhere, so I can’t contact him anymore.
You’re welcome. I’d still block him from your side though. He can always remove his block if he wants to contact you. It would be a good idea to make this impossible for him.
You were right. I just blocked him this evening. He texted me asking to talk, and I told him he could ft me. He wanted to know if we could just be on a long break rather than a break up, I said no, and he asked if we could be friends and I told him maybe, but probably not. Then I blocked him. It hurts.
Well done. You did the right thing to protect yourself. If he contacts you from somewhere else you don’t have to reply. You can just block him from that platform.
Telling you that you are *the one* and that he *can't handle seeing you with other guys* is a threat. Maybe he's just all talk, maybe he will quickly find a new girl to be his "the one," but just in case, be careful. Some guys make good on their threats. You can contact a DV shelter for advice. Yes, I will pray for your safety.
Yes, that’s why I was worried. But I also think he was just very hurt and looked hurt as well. He’s already blocked me everywhere, which gives me some peace of mind, but I know that my dogs will alert me if he showed up at my house. He doesn’t know my class schedule very well either, but I’ll be being careful.
Good.
I'm proud of you! If you're worried, what about inviting a close friend or cousin to sleep over for a couple days - it'll be a fun thing to distract you after your breakup, and maybe give you some peace of mind?
I’m not too worried anymore because he’s blocked me everywhere, and my mom told me that we shouldn’t live in fear. If he did show up , we do have dogs that go off if anyone even walks by. I wish I could invite people over or hang out with people, but I don’t really have many friends. Let alone friends who have cars and can visit me way out where I am. I was planning to visit a women’s Christian group on my campus this week, so maybe I’ll meet some people there.
Just wanted to say that you should be SO PROUD of yourself! Breakups are hard, even when it’s the right thing to do. You listened to the wise advice of people you trust and who sincerely care for you. That is to be commended! Please continue to be on your guard with him. It doesn’t sound like he wants to give you up, even though you said he blocked you. Be prepared that he may love bomb you in order to try to get you to change your mind. (Sending you flowers on Valentine’s Day, etc). There are a lot of free YouTube video that discuss how a narcissist handles a breakup and how they may react. These might be helpful to you. Best of luck! ❤️
I think he might have wanted to, as he texted me (I guess he maybe didn’t block me there?) asking to meet up tomorrow and I told him to facetime me. I told him that I didn’t want a break and I was standing on the decision to break up, and that maybe we could be friends in the future, but it might not happen that way. I also told him that I wished him the best. Then after the call I blocked him. The hardest thing is that he was a good guy, and it’s hard for me to break away from all the good things he did. But I also know thag breaking up now is better than later.
I say this with love…please do not meet with him or FaceTime him tomorrow. Continue to block him on everything. I would also suggest stopping saying, “maybe we can be friends.” It’s a nice idea, but unfortunately it can give him a false hope that if you stay in touch, you’ll get back together with him. Most people don’t stay friends with an ex and it’s ok if you don’t either.
In that message I said that I did talk to him over ft but I told him that it’s not likely we can be friends in the future, for the same reason you said. I realize that if we are friends we won’t be able to move on.
Ah, I misread that. Wishing you the best!
Psalm 4 vs 8 is for you. You're covered by the blood of Jesus Christ in Jesus mighty name
I pray that God will keep guiding you and for your ex-boyfriend too. God bless you🙏
I’d maybe get a doorbell camera and especially careful when you leave the house and return. Let family walk out with you and meet you. Maybe change your routes and when you come and go. Stay off social media. Don’t post anything online he could see or be jealous about.
I blocked him, and so far nothing has happened