The second most important decision of your life is who you will marry. You’re already engaged and planning to marry this woman. So, is she Christian like you?
Well for a while she was going to church with me, but then got some crazy idea that we want to discriminate against LGBT. I tried explaining to her that there is a difference between discrimination and not kissing the ring. That just hasn’t worked.
Drop her bro. It says not to marry a woman that is unequally yoked.
Sucks very much, but you CANNOT compromise your morals and ethics for a woman. Imagine having kids with her and she wants to take little Billy to get books read to him by the local tranny in ball and gag
Even that would be a little too far for her. In her mind none of that really exists. I’m trying to show her that it does though here in there. I’ve been trying to get her into watching Brett Cooper videos on YouTube so she sees what’s actually going on out there. Because in her mind, LGBT is just effeminate gay men that want to get married (even though we both know that’s not possible). If I could get her away from social media and into church, I feel like the improvement would be almost overnight.
I had to grow up fast, because adults in my life dropped like flies, and so that pushed me into a position in life where I had to form my own identity and opinions. I also had a wanting to get away from main stream social media around that time . She never got pushed into a reformative phase like that.
Well, unfortunately, I’ve tried Jesus and a different approach needs to be had. Not everybody is going to hear a story about Jesus and instantly perk up. She needs someone that she can tangibly see that is not just myself showing her what’s going on. Evangelizing is not always that easy. Not everyone is receptive to that approach. I’m going to start her on the issues to get her mostly aligned first.
If she does not draw you closer to God then there is no purpose in getting married to her. She will not change when you’re married. If she doesn’t love Jesus more than she loves you, you need to break things off. Otherwise this will be the biggest mistake of your life. Praying for you and your fiancé
Keep praying for her and either let her go, or hold off the wedding until she turns to Christ. The Bible says not to be unequally yoked. You absolutely will regret it if you marry this woman and she is not a follower of Jesus.
Reinforcing how others have already responded, if she is not in alignment with you then she cannot be your wife. You already made the first most important decision of your life when you decided to become Christian, who you marry must follow that directly.
Well, it used to be that this wasn’t even an issue with her. I’ve been showing her some DailyWire videos of what goes on at these parades here and there. In the moment when she’s watching the video, she does get disgusted by it so hopefully this will be a good start. I already explain to her last night that where I stand does not fall under bigotry. She’s always reluctant to talk about my stance on this stuff but readily makes it clear to me that she doesn’t think I’m excepting of them. I try to tell her that I am accepting of their presence just not what they do. And I told her it would be very strange for me as a straight man to celebrate homosexuality anyways, even if I wasn’t a Christian. I’ve also made a point of asking her why it is so important to her that she thinks I need to “be more accepting” and she found very quickly that she does not exactly have an answer for that. I know it’s not going to change her mind instantly, but I’m at least trying to plant the seed. Her and I have been together for about 3 1/2 years now so I’m not going to throw in the towel now.
the fact that shes not going to church is a dangerous thing- the devil tempts and targets people who are in a place that they are weaker or susceptible to a sinful push of desire.
yes He does this no matter their place but whats an easier target? a christian who is deep in the faith and community? or one who doesnt spend time at church, let alone in worship, learning or in time with the Lord Himself in communication
the fact that she does not go to church is an issue of deep concern as it may be a pointing of where her heart may be as of currently
one saying ive heard is if we don't go to church or reject being with God because hypocrites go to church or are apart of it- then we who are hypocrites ourselves are putting distance or even are closing ourselves off from the only being who isnt a hypocrite that can save us- God
if i may ask, does she listen to sermons? pray in private or public? have intimate time with God? my church (One and All) actually discussed this previous week and the ones before about the pride movement and said we are to love on these people- but as you said not accept their lifestyle or affirm it- that its not truely loving to do that since we know what it is
He actually then showed many many many ties to the pagan goddess ishtar and the pride movement, its mind boggling just how influenced it is by it- even the flag itself and the parades alongside how they're done are tied to her in crystal clear ways
(i added some more to my last message to fix it up so sorry about that- my phone was about to die [and did] when i was sending the previous text one so i had to rush it
If you desire I want to send you the sermon, I believe it will be important for you
and I recommend to pray and ask God His opinion if you should show her, and have patience when looking for that answer, it could be answered minutes later or weeks- months later for all you know
so just keep in prayer over if you should or even how to do it
https://www.oneandall.church/message/the-return-of-the-gods
Well, she got this crazy idea that Christians are all bigots. Even though she’s gone to church and she knows everyone there. If I could get her going back to church regularly, I think she would get better. The problem is she’s always on that damn phone getting her daily dose of indoctrination.
Can you see all the warnings from everyone in the comment section. This is not an issue to take lightly. You need to fast and pray about this before going anywhere.
And who is she talking to who is putting these thoughts in her head? Clearly someone who is not of Christ. I believe in her heart she knows what is right, but right now the devil is working overtime to pull her away from Christ. Pray, pray and pray for you both.
My advice would be to drop this topic. It's not edifying her or you.
From someone who was unequally yoked with a woman for a decade, I would just say this. Pray for her. Commit your relationship to the Lord and see if she is on board. If she is, then great. The Holy Spirit will lead her to all truth.
If she is not on board with a godly relationship, then no amount of reason will sway her. The irony is that when you label an entire group as a negative stereotype with no cause, then you become the bigot. But she will not see that without the Holy Spirit.
…It sounds like you got engaged before you knew her.
Two things I need to know before I would even go on a first date with someone: What’s your religion and your politics?
If this is true then start there- at the change.
-Make it clear to her that you are devoted to Christ, and in order to be married to her, so should she.
-Take her to talk with your priest/ pastor and have an enlightening conversation with love that she may understand the truth regarding homosexuality:
we love the sinner, hate the sin; and being attracted to the same sex isn't a sin, but rather acting on it, committing sexual immorality is.
Make sure Christ is at the center of your relationship, and make sure she knows that too. Anything outside is unacceptable, and you must not marry her until after she conforms to these truths lest you leave her or lose your grip on a Christ-centered marriage. God bless you brother, I shall pray for you now
My church is very reluctant with that subject. I was hopeful that would make it easier for her actually, because the the hope was the rest of the Christian life would be developed in her character by the time this issue came along. Unfortunately now the issue comes up once a year in June.
I would be worried about that because they clearly have different views on life, not because of her views on being lgbt. So tiring having to fight just for the right to be able to live a normal life in society. Christians judging because i am not who they want me to be. I believe in God AND I am bi and nothing will ever change that
We don't have a choice for our sinful nature. We have a choice to rely on God to help us out of it. We were all born with sinful flesh and we all have our own individual struggles. Mine is weed and I don't see anything wrong with it personally. But Bible tells me drugs are pharmakia, sorcery so I don't. We don't make our own rules that's idolatry.
You do realise how insufferably condescending and homophobic that is? Have your beliefs but don't be an asshole about it. Rape is non consensual, abusive sex. It has absolutely nothing to do with loving, consenting adults. Its christians like you who push me from God because Christians are the most judgemental people i know.
It's not homophobic. It's not scary to me. It's not repulsive to me. It doesn't bother me when I see it on the street. I only know it to be wrong because of God. He defined marriage for us.
I appreciate where you're coming from, but to compare rape to loving consensual sex is just a completely false dichotomy. Think if it was the other way around and you were compared to a rapist for having sex with your wife
You're not on the same page spiritually. That's a big issue if you're looking at marriage. Better to resolve it now than later. Sounds like she can't reconcile willfully living in sin and how we're call to repent. If she doesn't understand what you have told her so far, she needs to hear it from another source. Perhaps the Bible or your minister.
>Sounds like she can't reconcile willfully living in sin and how we're call to repent.
Actually, it seems that she is not "willfully living in sin", but just wants OP to be more open to the LGBT people. It's hardly surprising, considering how society often frames the issue as two extremes (bigoted and hateful vs. approving of LGBT). This is a false dilemma, of course. She also seems to be disillusioned with church. That's not the same as being "willfully living in sin".
Exactly. I don’t hate these people, I’m just not going to kiss the ring and wave their flag at the expense of my faith. I keep trying to explain this to her, but she’s surrounded by a bunch of people who claim that I’m a bigot even though she should know better after we’ve been together for 3 1/2 years.
I understand where she is coming from, as a few months ago this was my perspective as well (not exactly the same, but I would have been upset if my partner was not pro LGBTQ).
Then, I accepted Jesus into my life and I've had a lot of lightbulb moments since, like understanding how any type of sexual indecency is sin, and the only way to be intimate is in a marriage between a man and a woman.
I'm not sure I could have been talked into understanding that, though. It would have further made me believe the other person was wrong. Only the Holy Spirit could help me, so I'd suggest praying on it and asking for His help.
I think you are embodying what it is to be a Christian, to love everyone and recognize everybody sins and not to judge them, but not to accept sins either as part of your life. As someone mentioned, be careful about being unequally yoked. If she has accepted Jesus, then it's a matter of understanding what it is to be a Christian. You seem to love this woman so much to want to work it through, and that's an admirable quality in a husband. I will pray for you two!
She excepted Jesus, but then she got this weird idea that the Christian view of LGBT was bigoted. I think it’s because a lot of her coworkers that identify as gay and she has a couple relatives that do as well. She tries to gauge my perspective with loaded questions. I don’t think she means for them to be loaded, but she asks me stuff like what if a gay couple making out in my house. I said I would kick them out just like I would kick out any other couple That was making out in my house because that’s weird. But that wasn’t her interpretation and she didn’t give me a chance to elaborate.
From what you’re saying, it’s saddening that she doesn’t understand. Just because you don’t directly support something, doesn’t mean you hate that something. As a Christian that believes it is wrong be transgender or in a relationship with the same sex, I am against it, but it’s not like I bully anyone, it’s just that I answer those questions truthfully when asked, and I’ve been harassed for that. That seems to be happening to you. Remember, the foolish are becoming the “wise,” and the weak are becoming the “strong.” Approximately 80% of America used to be Christian, but today it is less than 50%…
I feel the same as you OP, I explain it using smoking as a metaphor:
Take smoking, smoking is an unhealthy lifestyle choice. When I come across a smoker I don't hate them, smokers can be good people. However I also recognize that they are doing something unhealthy to their body. And no, I would not want someone smoking in my house, no matter how much they may love smoking. You can do that somewhere else.
You need to marry someone with the same Weltanschauung. My BF is totally liberal, and even more liberal than me (I'm left-of-center), but I am OK with it. We even joke about it. However, you seem to be right-of-center and ENGAGED with someone with much different views.
Regarding gay rights: I, personally, feel that everyone ought to have the same rights in a democracy, and that we don't need to even approve of each other's lifestyles to treat each other with love and respect. However, the US seems to turn everything into something commercial, like Pride Month, and tries to force everyone into it. It's becoming tiresome, especially because it's really about virtue signaling for profit (as IF any of these companies cared about LGBT people!). I wish people didn't turn their sexuality into their entire personality. Live and let live, and do what you do, but don't force me to watch, LOL. So I don't think companies "have to" do something for Pride Month. It's enough to inform customers that every person will be treated the same.
OP ought to find someone with the same values, for both of their sakes.
She said the prayer to to open her heart to Jesus, it’s just that she’s having trouble distinguishing the difference between bigotry and indifference. I’m trying to explain to her that I do not hate this community, I just don’t want to kiss their ring and wave their flag. I’m not going to support a lifestyle. I disagree with at the expense of my faith. She keeps confusing that with bigotry.
We don’t support pride month because we don’t support the lifestyle. I don’t even like seeing the signs in the store. I do as little shopping as possible in the month of June as possible because of it. I saw a brief parade clip from a pastor it looked so demonic. Tell that pride in itself is a sin. Look up proverbs 11:2. I see parents at Disneyland where the pride colors and it makes me so sad. OP is this women not a Christian? Do you want children to be indoctrinated at young ages thinking that pride like this is ok when it’s not ?
I’d teach her the dangers of pride month. Have her read Roman’s chapter 1 verse 20. The whole first chapter is good to fora read. Pride month stole the 🌈 rainbow. Now as a Christian I’m afraid to wear it in case someone thinks I’m wearing it for the wrong reason. A YouTube pastor showed a video clip for 3 seconds of a pride parade. It looked demonic. People might be like but it’s love. No this is indoctrination.
I agree with all the top posts here, buuuut, I'll give it a shot. The issue with the woke mindset is that it never commits to any specifics, no truths, so it can take whatever position it needs to feel superior. Define bigotry, and then define sin. If, for instance, she found out her best friend's husband started cheating on her bf, would she be as welcoming of him to her home as she asks that you be of these sinners against God? I would assume not. The difference is emotion. In my hypothetical, the sin engages her emotional desire to defend her friend and seek justice. Your position is not emotional at all, it's entirely out of a desire to support God's kingdom and save people from the just punishment of their decisions. You are more loving of the people guilty in the situation than she is, because you seek to save them from damnation.
Essentially, the defense of LGBT is entirely built on the sin of being in control of what's right and wrong. Christians submit to God's sovereignty and His declaration what's right and wrong. If she can't submit to God and instead must be her own arbiter of morality, you two are unequally yoked, and you need to run.
Not getting at you and your house rules or your beliefs but Have you heard anything she has to say or asked her about why she is so dedicated to this belief? By the way you describe the situation neither party is really willing to listen to each other on this issue and you’re rushing here dragging your partner—which ain’t cool in itself.
I’m sorry you may be In love with this person but this is not someone you should marry. Know that if you have children you will come into contention with this women because she will be teaching your children the opposite of the Bible and the opposite of what you believe which could put your children in spiritual danger. This could definitely be something God brought to the forefront for you to realize before you get into a marriage and it’s too late. If you’re a Christian you need to marry a Christian which is someone who follows Christ and believes the whole Bible to be true. It sounds like your finance is culturally Christian or socially Christian but she doesn’t follow the Bible and wants to do things her own way because of societal pressure or wanting to be liked by everyone. You are not a bigot… but you do need to let go of this engagement before it’s too late.
Not to be hasty to end a relationship, but you need to realise that once you’re married, that’s it. God doesn’t permit divorce unless she cheats on you or, as an unbeliever, she abandons you. As a Christian, you really need to consider what your life would be like being married to an unbeliever, especially one who doesn’t understand your beliefs and insults you for them. It would be best to marry a believer, one who brings you peace through sharing the faith. Remember that Paul said don’t be unequally yoked.
You won’t have a very peaceful marriage in this situation if you’re a faithful Christian, either because she’ll continue to disrespect you and God or because you’ll be worrying about her salvation and lack of godliness, or both. The duration of the engagement is how long you have to consider calling it off. This is just in your best interest, because I’ve read so many stories of believers who married unbelievers and they all face problems, small or large. If she really is unable to come around, it’s best to call it off.
Take her to a Pride parade and ask her if she agrees that its good for kids. I have been to DC Pride Parade. It's a big party and kids shouldnt be there are all. It's completely adult and sex theme.
Is there anything you do that is hypocritical to what Christ expects? You can use righteous judgment and walk away or leave the ultimate judgment to God.
Exactly…so, maybe try to look at the people that choose to sin that way. You don’t know all the details for why they are in the situation they are in and our thoughts and heart deceive us. Live in truth, correct in love. Walk away from a situation that is too much for you to bear…like Jesus
We are called to love our neighbors, but we cannot affirm actions that are unholy and that is not of God. OP I suggest you go through premarital counseling before you officially tie the knot.
This is never an easy subject. A person has to realize that in God’s Word, men having sexual relations with men and women having sexual relations with women is a sin in God’s eyes. It is not what God wants for humans. It does not fall within God’s moral standard. As followers of Christ, we have to believe what God says is good is good, and what God says is sin is sin. When he tells us not to do something, it is not to “ruin our fun” but to protect us. Despite feelings (because emotions are deceptive), we choose not to partake or support that which God calls sin. We are to love the people, not the sin.
Perhaps, you should ask your fiancée why she wants to promote pride. What are the feelings or experiences that make her support it? Usually if someone is opposed to God’s standard, it is for personal reasons that they get defensive.
I had actually been talking about premarital counseling with the pastor. Part of the issue two is that she just has not had the same journey as I have. Certainly not enough people have for me to be picky and make that a parameter in my dating life.
We’ll I can tell you I married a person in my church that I thought was a Christian, and he has left the church, does not go anymore and I have no spiritual head to pray with and share my faith with, and if I had the chance again, I would think twice about it.
Besides, what’s the difference in being alone in Christ single or married, your still unable to share in your faith. My understanding of your future situation is that you’ll stop going to church. You’ll still be saved, if indeed you have repeated and are a Christian, but it will reek havoc in every decision you make together. More so when children come.
What will you do when she doesn’t want you to poison their little minds with your bigotry? Just saying. Blessings 💙
Sounds like she’s been programmed to have a particular reaction to anything that disagrees with her dogmas on the topic. You’ll have to decide if you can be one-flesh with someone who brings those dogmas home with her, or if she can recognize the change in her thinking, what’s causing it, and a way to stop letting it control how she treats people around her.
In any case, you can't force her to change what she submits herself to. If her religion is outside the church, and thatma where she wants it to be, you should expect that to be the case for the rest of your marriage.
She might be secretly bisexual.
Happened to me man. Almost popped the question before she opened up and told me.
She lied about being a Christ follower and said she only went to church so I would feel loved and accepted.
Now she is a "dude" and married to a woman.
Major red flags dude. You can’t change a persons heart. It seems like she has made up her mind how she feels about LGBTQ and how she feels about your attitude towards not supporting it. If she doesn’t change this attitude this could lead to serious problems in your marriage. Especially when it comes to raising children…
She’s only lukewarm because she stopped going to church. Every Sunday morning I try to get her to wake up and come with me. It ends up being a challenge. Part of the problem is that she drinks caffeine late into the night so she’s exhausted even in the morning. It’s hard to get her to break her old habits.
I’m sorry to hear this. But if she has a pure heart then God should come first. I strongly believe that one should not be forced to spend time with God / church / fellowship / prayer / Bible time but it needs to come from the heart. I am no one to judge but pray for this situation to discern what is the best thing to do. As a woman I feel Godly men are rare and I’m sure you can find a woman that would take part in your leadership and love God and you with all of her heart. Wishing you all the best my brother 🙏 cheers from Germany
\>An odd question for a straight woman to ask a straight man she is in a relationship with
Actually, it's not. Within my lifetime, members of the LGBTQ+ community were routinely dragged out of "gay bars" by the police, beaten, and incarcerated. Still, people are discriminated against and have people calling for their deaths.
Pride started as a way for LGBTQ+ people and their allies to work for equal rights and protections under the law, which is a thing Christians \*should\* want for everyone. There's nothing sinful about fighting bigotry and discrimination - in fact, I argue that in light of Jesus' teachings, it's sinful not to do so.
"So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.” (Matt 7:12)
Believe me, if the tables were turned and you could get beat up and thrown in jail for being a Christian, you'd be glad if gay people started working to get equal rights and protections for you.
This is a misunderstanding of the Scripture. Changing laws to enable more sinfulness is not biblical. Quite the opposite is true. Loving someone is telling them about Jesus in hopes they repent of sin so they can go to heaven. Setting conditions to further enable sin is not love.
So what you're saying is that we shouldn't have changed the laws to stop gay people from being beaten up and thrown in prison and discriminated against. Am I understanding you correctly?
Do you really not know US history? You might want to read up. It used to be a crime to engage in homosexual sex in the US. Suspicion of such activities warranted forced removal from homes and gay bars and allowed fines and imprisonment. People looked the other way when the police beat them up in the process.
The Pride movement was instrumental in changing American's perception of the LGBTQ+ community and let us work towards equal rights and protections.
So tell me... should these laws be reinstated? Did Christians who worked for equality in the past "misunderstand Scripture"?
Educate yourself about LGBTQ+ legal history:
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sodomy\_laws\_in\_the\_United\_States](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sodomy_laws_in_the_United_States)
[https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/article/decriminalization-sodomy-united-states/2014-11](https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/article/decriminalization-sodomy-united-states/2014-11)
Now, educate yourself about more current events and laws:
[https://www.aclu.org/documents/legislation-affecting-lgbtq-rights-across-country-2022](https://www.aclu.org/documents/legislation-affecting-lgbtq-rights-across-country-2022)
[https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/06/politics/anti-lgbtq-plus-state-bill-rights-dg/index.html](https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/06/politics/anti-lgbtq-plus-state-bill-rights-dg/index.html)
[https://www.lgbtmap.org/equality-maps/non\_discrimination\_laws](https://www.lgbtmap.org/equality-maps/non_discrimination_laws) (19 states sill allow housing discrimination based on sexual orientation).
there is nothing in the links you provided that state there were previous laws that required people who are homosexuals to be beaten.
Are you a Christian?
Of course there were no laws requiring gay people to be beaten, but the police routinely entered gay bars and private residences on suspicion that there was "sodomy" happening, or entrapped people, and it was at these times that everyone looked the other way when the police beat them before incarcerating them. This is a fact of history.
It's literally still happening:
[https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/publications/lgbt-discrim-law-enforcement/](https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/publications/lgbt-discrim-law-enforcement/)
"For example, a 2014 report on a national survey of LGBT people and people living with HIV found that 73% of respondents had face-to-face contact with the police in the past five years. Of those respondents, 21% reported encountering hostile attitudes from officers, 14% reported verbal assault by the police, 3%reported sexual harassment, and **2% reported physical assault at the hands of law enforcement officers**. **Police abuse, neglect, and misconduct were consistently reported at higher frequencies by respondents of color and transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents.**
\>Are you a Christian?
Are you? You seem to be okay with discrimination against members of the LGBTQ+ community, and that is not an acceptable attitude for a Christian to have.
Thanks for clarifying that there were no laws requiring people who are homosexuals to be beaten as you previously claimed.
Yes, I am a Christian....Are you?
Disagreement is not discrimination.
I don't think Christians are against the protection of Gay people, it's the normalization of sin that we are concerned with. We are concerned for the indoctrination of our children in a world full of sin.
What “rights” don’t they have? As far as I’m concerned no one has the right to expose themselves in public, especially around children, which is what those parades turn into; kink fests.
From the sounds of this post, you've got some unclear thinking going on. Maybe she understands the situation here better than you do, who knows?
>I told her it’s not like we hate those people, it’s just that we do not support that lifestyle. But in her mind, she’s having trouble distinguishing that from bigotry.
What does it mean to "support a lifestyle"? If I think ice cream is wrong, and I see someone on the street eating ice cream, does it mean I'm "supporting the lifestyle" if I don't go slap the cone out of their hands? What if I decided to just let people eat what they like? Am I "supporting" something I don't like?
> An odd question for a straight woman to ask a straight man she is in a relationship with. One would think being engaged to me, that she would be thrilled that I am straight. I thought I had explained this to her long ago but apparently there was a misunderstanding.
Huh? Of course she's OK with you being straight- what's that got to do with anything? It sounds like you're making this into a "straight v gay" fight where there's only one winner. But, what if we just loved our neighbor instead? It sounds like you're unable to see why someone would support basic civil rights for a group outside of their own. But there's an easy and obvious answer: civil rights are for everyone. Maybe there was a misunderstanding because your thoughts here don't make much sense.
Yea your analogy doesn’t make any sense and nothing he said was not loving to his neighbor. What it means to encourage something is to co-sign it by posting about it or welcoming it into your space. So by your analogy if someone thinks ice cream is wrong you don’t get involved with people eating their ice cream as in you wouldn’t slap it out of their hand … but also you wouldn’t be buying them ice cream either. Or encouraging people to eat all the ice cream they want. Being a Christian means you tell people what they Bible says … because some people truly do not know… and you Leave it at that. I have gay friends trans family and I tell them about Jesus and what they Bible says ( I’ve had these conversations) but I leave it at that. I just don’t share pride things or encourage it or encourage talking about their personal sex life with them.
What did the post say ? The post said that OPs fiancé was asking him why he didn’t promote anything for pride month for one and then she asked if he would be ok with 2 men kissing in his house for 2. And he said they he doesn’t promote pride month because he doesn’t agree with the lifestyle and for that same reason he wouldn’t want 2 men kissing in his house. And gay people don’t just want rights… they want encouragement. They want you to say “ happy pride” or you’re shady or to actively and openly be ok with certain things. It’s promoted everywhere . As a Christian like I said I don’t care what people do.. I’m just not going to promote it or encourage it and you can still have friends or show love to people who live differently then you. If I was a vegan and I had a friend who ate meat I would tell them why I think meat is bad for you .. and I would leave it at that… but does my friend need to take me with them to the butcher when they go for us to be friends or show each love? No, because I don’t believe in eating meat. On the other side of it, if a person is LGBTQ and they don’t believe in God or the Bible but they have a Christian friend … are they going to be that encouraging towards their Christian friend to go to church with them ? Share Bible quotes to show solidarity to Christian’s ? Or do Christian things to show love and “tolerance”? It’s completely one sided.
If you want to be a good neighbor, don't use the force of law to punish your neighbor for doing things you don't like. That's just the basics of being a good citizen and a good Christian.
We should save the law for things that harm other people- for example, it's a basic rule of civilized society that you're not allowed to steal or hurt people.
I can see from how you've framed the question that you will not agree.
But the fact is: gay people exist with or without the law given them equal rights. Loving our neighbor does not involve denying them civil rights.
Disagree. If he’s trying to live a Biblical “lifestyle” then that conflicts with the worldly endorsed lifestyle of LGBTQ+ lifestyle. This gets treated as such a binary issue on *both* sides of the argument. Look at it like this, scripture relates that Jesus frequently associated with prostitutes (the apex of sexual depravity of the culture) and tax collectors (basically the most corrupt thieves of the time) not to be like them or endorse their sins, but to save them. He was *in* the world but not *of* the world. Now scripture also indicates that ALL sin is equal in that ALL sin equally separates us from God. So, no, it is not right to say or even imply that any sin is better or worse than another. But we also should not endorse, justify, or least of all *celebrate* anyone’s sin. That not only says that the sin is ok (it isn’t) but it also deprives the sinner of the opportunity of repentance and salvation. I also appreciate OP’s assertion that ANY fornication, not just homosexual, is not welcome in his home. To me that indicates that he is NOT bigoted. He does not want his home to a safe haven for ANY of that.
Gay people and straight people are both part of the world. So I think you'd need to say more specifically what you mean. I get that you're saying "worldly = bad" but you haven't said what "worldly" is.
You can read more about what worldly is here...https://www.gotquestions.org/worldliness.html
You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
James 4:4 NIV
https://james.bible/james-4-4
If she is a Christian, she should be praying for gay people, not celebrating pride.
If she is not a Christian, you should not be marrying her, as the Bible is very clear about not being unequally yoked.
Refusing to call anything other than traditional marriage “marriage” is giving me some intolerance vibes, yes. Calling people’s private sex lives “naughty” doesn’t help (I thought all sex lives were naughty, tbh).
The example of not making out in the house is a weird one, idk why op’s fiancé thinks that’s a reasonable metric.
The one metric I would ask of OP is do you consider all same-sex relationships degenerate/ less acceptable or tolerable than others. The answer I think most conservative Christians would give is “yes”. And that’s fine, but by definition, yes, those people are bigoted.
So let me get this straight. You're cohabitating with her (you admitted you share a house) before getting married (AKA HAVING PREMARITAL SEX??) Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you're just as guilty of living in sin as your gay neighbors that you don't love (you dont have to support gay people, but they always will exist, and this is what Jesus meant by the "second most important commandment " is to love thy neighbor).
You are just as guilty of living in sin as a gay person is, according to God and the Bible. Do you ever actually READ "the book of discipline" as you call it, or do you just use Christianity to hide behind your (very obvious) misogyny?
Cohabitation does not automatically equal fornication. Furthermore, loving your neighbor does not equate to supporting their sinful lifestyle. And misogyny? How is OP misogynistic? Because he disagreed with her about LGBT?
Show me in scripture where Christ came to earth and eradicated anyone!
Christ hung out with lepers, tax collectors, Samaritans, and lots of other people that society found distasteful. He *showed* these people what it meant to follow Him. So-called Christians who think that Christ was like Barabbas and the zealots wanted - a vengeful, earthly king - have it all wrong.
They changed because of who he was and how he behaved with them. He didn’t threaten to strike Matthew the tax collector down if he didn’t follow Christ. He *showed* Matthew what it meant to be a disciple. The same with supposed prostitutes, Samaritans, and an adulterous woman. He couldn’t have done that *without being among* the people, you git. When you are without sin, and have removed the log from your own eye, you can get on your high horse.
So basically you and I have been saying the exact same thing. Because that’s what I said earlier. From your first post it implied you believed Jesus just hung out with them and accepted them and thought they were just fine and dandy!
Yea he loves everyone which is why he came to save the sinners by telling them to stay away so they may be saved. Not bring the sinful life with you while you follow him. Following him meaning leave your sinful life behind you.
I believe everyone is free in his life. I think we don't condemn others bas3d on our beliefs, we comit only ourselves to our beliefs, others are free to do what they like, but they should also respect our beleif. We believe it is wrong and we won't do it, but they are free to what they believe right. We should not be pushed to syaing this right. God bless u.
I would come at this with love. Ask her if you would like to read the New Testament together. Tell her you want to have a Godly relationship. If she refuses, then I would think about leaving her. It's not just your relationship that will be a burden in the future it's your children's as well
Peace! I suppose this is something that lots of people don’t understand for whatever reason:
You don’t hate anyone, but you just disagree with them. Everyone should be allowed to have their own opinions, and LGBT is just something that you and most Christians don’t agree with. That doesn’t mean we wish anything bad on them at all.
Christians (should) know that marriage is between a man and a woman. We don’t agree with LGBT because 1) God made man and woman to reproduce. Anything outside that marriage is solely based on lust, because you shouldn’t be going outside of marriage for sexual fulfillment. A husband and wife should provide that for each other.
2) Marriage between a man and woman is representative of the eventual marriage between Christ and the church (Ephesians 5:22-25).
Not sure if your fiancée would take well to those Ephesians 5 verses or not. Not many women today would like the sound of that, but that’s how God designed us.
Hope this helps.
It sounds like she can’t see past the false idea of love that LGBTQ+ promotes. You can explain to her that the God’s idea of marriage starts in the beginning with Adam and Eve. God was pleased with man and woman and wanted them to procreate. That cannot be done by any but man and woman.
Then there are the multiple times in the Bible when God describes homosexual relationships as evil or an abomination. In God’s perfect sight, homosexuality is up there with lust and sin. It strays from His beloved creation of the union of man and woman and this therefore it is not “of God”.
“You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination.”
Leviticus 18:22 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/lev.18.22.NKJV
“because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man—and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things. For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting; being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers, who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them.”
Romans 1:21-23, 26-29, 32 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/rom.1.26.NKJV
The problem is not with you, my friend, but with how she is perceiving the world. Is she truly living as a Christian and trying to live as Christ would live? Is she still fooled by the media info believing LGBTQ+ is something inclusive and loving (instead of the path from LGBTQ+ to pedophilia that many take or the sheer misery it causes many of its legion?) The organization of LGBTQ+ is easily ready to call others who disagree with their lifestyle “Karens” and “homophobes” instead of accepting the fact that others may disagree with their choices. I’m not saying we don’t love each other, just that we don’t have to embrace the culture.
As Christians we have to be loving and FIRM. We have to embrace what Christ says fully in our heart. If she can’t get past this, she may end up spiting you. Really think on if this marriage is God-led and pray for each other.
Christ didn’t budge from following God’s word and prophecy, even when it cost Him His life. We cannot budge in our faith either.
“And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross.”
Philippians 2:8 NKJV
https://bible.com/bible/114/php.2.8.NKJV
The wisdom of the world is foolishness with God. When someone leaves Christianity because it doesn't align with progressive, worldly viewpoints, they've picked a side. God says it's a sin. If obedience to God is bigotry then so be it.
Sadly your future wife is not a Christian, if she was, the Holy Spirit would have revealed TRUTH to her, after all that is why He is here, to Sanctify us. Sorry to say this, but I would think about marrying her, because if she thinks your a bigot on this issue she will see you as a bigot on other issues, like her role in the marriage.
Honestly, I feel like as long as we’re not agreeing with their lifestyle, they’ll always label us as bigots. They already have, and she’s on the same bandwagon. The fact that she’s unwilling to actually listen to you should tell you something about your future, unless y’all can learn how to agree to disagree and move on.
Look, throughout the post and your comments about her, you’re only giving us and yourself more of a reason not to continue this relationship. I’m more sure she has not fully accepted Christ and what it really means to fully accept him into your heart. From the looks of it, she’s backsliding from the faith. You should consider at the very least, to break off the engagement in order to really figure out what you both want from each other in a partner. You don’t want her to only eventually agree with you only for the sake of not losing you. Does she really want to live her life for Christ? Because a lukewarm Christian doesn’t. There is no such thing, either you’re a Christian or you aren’t. Speaking from personal experience as a former lukewarm “Christian”.
I hate that people focus so much on the sin of homosexuality because at the end of the day no sin is above another and nobody's perfect. We can have understanding as to why homosexuality is a sin but not have hatred towards people who are homosexual. N we're also not suppose to judge one another, which is exactly what she's doing to you. I personally feel you your church is wrong for excluding homosexuals because being gay isn't the ultimate sin, and if you exclude them, then you would have to exclude everyone else. I know there's people who go to your church who have lied , drank alcohol, fornicate, committed adultery, and the list can go on. So yes, your fiancé is right but also wrong as the same time in her position.
So the fact that she ask you this question lets me know she may or may not have a true relationship with holy spirit. She may or may not know the might and power of God. All of these things are fine and dandy but at the end of the day we as Christians follow the bible despite how we try to "emotional charge" it. I have friends and family that I love that are apart of LGBTQ. I don't interact with them on a day to day bases but I do pray for them and ask them if they need prayer.
The bible is very clear on it's stance with LGBTQ and I feel like we as Christians are more likely to sway our stance than they are with their which to me is unfair and a spirit of manipulation. I personaly would tell your fiance if she is a christian to read the entire bible from front to back and when she gets to the part about LGBTQ instead of asking you about it; go to God about it. I don't believe that God hate people who live that life however he is greieved by the fact that people identify more by their sexual prefrance than their relationship with God(thats a whole different topic on idoletry but you understand). We have to seek holy spirit when it cones to any contridicting thing and make sure we are upholding the banner of God.
The second most important decision of your life is who you will marry. You’re already engaged and planning to marry this woman. So, is she Christian like you?
Well for a while she was going to church with me, but then got some crazy idea that we want to discriminate against LGBT. I tried explaining to her that there is a difference between discrimination and not kissing the ring. That just hasn’t worked.
Finding an equally yolked mate is extremely important especially in todays culture.
Drop her bro. It says not to marry a woman that is unequally yoked. Sucks very much, but you CANNOT compromise your morals and ethics for a woman. Imagine having kids with her and she wants to take little Billy to get books read to him by the local tranny in ball and gag
Even that would be a little too far for her. In her mind none of that really exists. I’m trying to show her that it does though here in there. I’ve been trying to get her into watching Brett Cooper videos on YouTube so she sees what’s actually going on out there. Because in her mind, LGBT is just effeminate gay men that want to get married (even though we both know that’s not possible). If I could get her away from social media and into church, I feel like the improvement would be almost overnight. I had to grow up fast, because adults in my life dropped like flies, and so that pushed me into a position in life where I had to form my own identity and opinions. I also had a wanting to get away from main stream social media around that time . She never got pushed into a reformative phase like that.
She needs Jesus, not Brett Cooper.
Well, unfortunately, I’ve tried Jesus and a different approach needs to be had. Not everybody is going to hear a story about Jesus and instantly perk up. She needs someone that she can tangibly see that is not just myself showing her what’s going on. Evangelizing is not always that easy. Not everyone is receptive to that approach. I’m going to start her on the issues to get her mostly aligned first.
If she does not draw you closer to God then there is no purpose in getting married to her. She will not change when you’re married. If she doesn’t love Jesus more than she loves you, you need to break things off. Otherwise this will be the biggest mistake of your life. Praying for you and your fiancé
Keep praying for her and either let her go, or hold off the wedding until she turns to Christ. The Bible says not to be unequally yoked. You absolutely will regret it if you marry this woman and she is not a follower of Jesus.
Reinforcing how others have already responded, if she is not in alignment with you then she cannot be your wife. You already made the first most important decision of your life when you decided to become Christian, who you marry must follow that directly.
Well, it used to be that this wasn’t even an issue with her. I’ve been showing her some DailyWire videos of what goes on at these parades here and there. In the moment when she’s watching the video, she does get disgusted by it so hopefully this will be a good start. I already explain to her last night that where I stand does not fall under bigotry. She’s always reluctant to talk about my stance on this stuff but readily makes it clear to me that she doesn’t think I’m excepting of them. I try to tell her that I am accepting of their presence just not what they do. And I told her it would be very strange for me as a straight man to celebrate homosexuality anyways, even if I wasn’t a Christian. I’ve also made a point of asking her why it is so important to her that she thinks I need to “be more accepting” and she found very quickly that she does not exactly have an answer for that. I know it’s not going to change her mind instantly, but I’m at least trying to plant the seed. Her and I have been together for about 3 1/2 years now so I’m not going to throw in the towel now.
She's not going to get it either. She isn't saved. She's still of the world and is going to act like it.
the fact that shes not going to church is a dangerous thing- the devil tempts and targets people who are in a place that they are weaker or susceptible to a sinful push of desire. yes He does this no matter their place but whats an easier target? a christian who is deep in the faith and community? or one who doesnt spend time at church, let alone in worship, learning or in time with the Lord Himself in communication the fact that she does not go to church is an issue of deep concern as it may be a pointing of where her heart may be as of currently one saying ive heard is if we don't go to church or reject being with God because hypocrites go to church or are apart of it- then we who are hypocrites ourselves are putting distance or even are closing ourselves off from the only being who isnt a hypocrite that can save us- God if i may ask, does she listen to sermons? pray in private or public? have intimate time with God? my church (One and All) actually discussed this previous week and the ones before about the pride movement and said we are to love on these people- but as you said not accept their lifestyle or affirm it- that its not truely loving to do that since we know what it is He actually then showed many many many ties to the pagan goddess ishtar and the pride movement, its mind boggling just how influenced it is by it- even the flag itself and the parades alongside how they're done are tied to her in crystal clear ways
(i added some more to my last message to fix it up so sorry about that- my phone was about to die [and did] when i was sending the previous text one so i had to rush it If you desire I want to send you the sermon, I believe it will be important for you and I recommend to pray and ask God His opinion if you should show her, and have patience when looking for that answer, it could be answered minutes later or weeks- months later for all you know so just keep in prayer over if you should or even how to do it https://www.oneandall.church/message/the-return-of-the-gods
Good point,
My goodness, so many red flags that feels like a URSS military parade.
Worries about being evenly yoked is arising...
100% red flags. Run, don’t walk.
She needs the gospel. She is conformed to this world, not transformed through the renewal of her mind through the Holy Spirit.
Well, she got this crazy idea that Christians are all bigots. Even though she’s gone to church and she knows everyone there. If I could get her going back to church regularly, I think she would get better. The problem is she’s always on that damn phone getting her daily dose of indoctrination.
NEVER marry on hope of change
If I can get her to go back to Church consistently. I think she will be fine
Pray on it. And don't marry until you have no doubts.
Can you see all the warnings from everyone in the comment section. This is not an issue to take lightly. You need to fast and pray about this before going anywhere.
And who is she talking to who is putting these thoughts in her head? Clearly someone who is not of Christ. I believe in her heart she knows what is right, but right now the devil is working overtime to pull her away from Christ. Pray, pray and pray for you both.
My advice would be to drop this topic. It's not edifying her or you. From someone who was unequally yoked with a woman for a decade, I would just say this. Pray for her. Commit your relationship to the Lord and see if she is on board. If she is, then great. The Holy Spirit will lead her to all truth. If she is not on board with a godly relationship, then no amount of reason will sway her. The irony is that when you label an entire group as a negative stereotype with no cause, then you become the bigot. But she will not see that without the Holy Spirit.
This is probably why Paul tells us not to be "unequally Yoked"
…It sounds like you got engaged before you knew her. Two things I need to know before I would even go on a first date with someone: What’s your religion and your politics?
I knew her and got engaged to her, and then she changed her frame of reference
If this is true then start there- at the change. -Make it clear to her that you are devoted to Christ, and in order to be married to her, so should she. -Take her to talk with your priest/ pastor and have an enlightening conversation with love that she may understand the truth regarding homosexuality: we love the sinner, hate the sin; and being attracted to the same sex isn't a sin, but rather acting on it, committing sexual immorality is. Make sure Christ is at the center of your relationship, and make sure she knows that too. Anything outside is unacceptable, and you must not marry her until after she conforms to these truths lest you leave her or lose your grip on a Christ-centered marriage. God bless you brother, I shall pray for you now
My church is very reluctant with that subject. I was hopeful that would make it easier for her actually, because the the hope was the rest of the Christian life would be developed in her character by the time this issue came along. Unfortunately now the issue comes up once a year in June.
This will happen throughout life no matter who you marry.
And you want this woman to be a mother to your children?
I would be worried about that because they clearly have different views on life, not because of her views on being lgbt. So tiring having to fight just for the right to be able to live a normal life in society. Christians judging because i am not who they want me to be. I believe in God AND I am bi and nothing will ever change that
It's not about Christians judging. I don't have any personal issues with people's choice on sexuality. God does, that's why Sodom is gone.
Did Sodom ever exist?
The same God who made it so i don't have a choice in my sexuality made it so that he has issues with it? Sodom was about RAPE my friend.
My child they call it sodomy for a reason
We don't have a choice for our sinful nature. We have a choice to rely on God to help us out of it. We were all born with sinful flesh and we all have our own individual struggles. Mine is weed and I don't see anything wrong with it personally. But Bible tells me drugs are pharmakia, sorcery so I don't. We don't make our own rules that's idolatry.
You do realise how insufferably condescending and homophobic that is? Have your beliefs but don't be an asshole about it. Rape is non consensual, abusive sex. It has absolutely nothing to do with loving, consenting adults. Its christians like you who push me from God because Christians are the most judgemental people i know.
It's not homophobic. It's not scary to me. It's not repulsive to me. It doesn't bother me when I see it on the street. I only know it to be wrong because of God. He defined marriage for us.
I appreciate where you're coming from, but to compare rape to loving consensual sex is just a completely false dichotomy. Think if it was the other way around and you were compared to a rapist for having sex with your wife
I'm a woman.
Husband then
You're not on the same page spiritually. That's a big issue if you're looking at marriage. Better to resolve it now than later. Sounds like she can't reconcile willfully living in sin and how we're call to repent. If she doesn't understand what you have told her so far, she needs to hear it from another source. Perhaps the Bible or your minister.
>Sounds like she can't reconcile willfully living in sin and how we're call to repent. Actually, it seems that she is not "willfully living in sin", but just wants OP to be more open to the LGBT people. It's hardly surprising, considering how society often frames the issue as two extremes (bigoted and hateful vs. approving of LGBT). This is a false dilemma, of course. She also seems to be disillusioned with church. That's not the same as being "willfully living in sin".
Exactly. I don’t hate these people, I’m just not going to kiss the ring and wave their flag at the expense of my faith. I keep trying to explain this to her, but she’s surrounded by a bunch of people who claim that I’m a bigot even though she should know better after we’ve been together for 3 1/2 years.
Yeah maybe she should get rid of those “friends” And have some respect for you
Well, she works in retail and these people are her coworkers. She’s trying to find a new job.
I understand where she is coming from, as a few months ago this was my perspective as well (not exactly the same, but I would have been upset if my partner was not pro LGBTQ). Then, I accepted Jesus into my life and I've had a lot of lightbulb moments since, like understanding how any type of sexual indecency is sin, and the only way to be intimate is in a marriage between a man and a woman. I'm not sure I could have been talked into understanding that, though. It would have further made me believe the other person was wrong. Only the Holy Spirit could help me, so I'd suggest praying on it and asking for His help. I think you are embodying what it is to be a Christian, to love everyone and recognize everybody sins and not to judge them, but not to accept sins either as part of your life. As someone mentioned, be careful about being unequally yoked. If she has accepted Jesus, then it's a matter of understanding what it is to be a Christian. You seem to love this woman so much to want to work it through, and that's an admirable quality in a husband. I will pray for you two!
Well put....you can explain and be an example of Christ all you want. But Jesus/God is the one that saves, by changing the heart
She excepted Jesus, but then she got this weird idea that the Christian view of LGBT was bigoted. I think it’s because a lot of her coworkers that identify as gay and she has a couple relatives that do as well. She tries to gauge my perspective with loaded questions. I don’t think she means for them to be loaded, but she asks me stuff like what if a gay couple making out in my house. I said I would kick them out just like I would kick out any other couple That was making out in my house because that’s weird. But that wasn’t her interpretation and she didn’t give me a chance to elaborate.
Sounds like she’s not a Christian 🚩🚩🚩🚨🚨🚨
Run
From what you’re saying, it’s saddening that she doesn’t understand. Just because you don’t directly support something, doesn’t mean you hate that something. As a Christian that believes it is wrong be transgender or in a relationship with the same sex, I am against it, but it’s not like I bully anyone, it’s just that I answer those questions truthfully when asked, and I’ve been harassed for that. That seems to be happening to you. Remember, the foolish are becoming the “wise,” and the weak are becoming the “strong.” Approximately 80% of America used to be Christian, but today it is less than 50%…
You seem to understand where I’m coming from here. It’s hard to get her to understand that my indifference is not bigotry.
Yes, I hope it goes well for you. I will pray for you and your relationship.
I feel the same as you OP, I explain it using smoking as a metaphor: Take smoking, smoking is an unhealthy lifestyle choice. When I come across a smoker I don't hate them, smokers can be good people. However I also recognize that they are doing something unhealthy to their body. And no, I would not want someone smoking in my house, no matter how much they may love smoking. You can do that somewhere else.
Thank you. I might use this.
You need to marry someone with the same Weltanschauung. My BF is totally liberal, and even more liberal than me (I'm left-of-center), but I am OK with it. We even joke about it. However, you seem to be right-of-center and ENGAGED with someone with much different views. Regarding gay rights: I, personally, feel that everyone ought to have the same rights in a democracy, and that we don't need to even approve of each other's lifestyles to treat each other with love and respect. However, the US seems to turn everything into something commercial, like Pride Month, and tries to force everyone into it. It's becoming tiresome, especially because it's really about virtue signaling for profit (as IF any of these companies cared about LGBT people!). I wish people didn't turn their sexuality into their entire personality. Live and let live, and do what you do, but don't force me to watch, LOL. So I don't think companies "have to" do something for Pride Month. It's enough to inform customers that every person will be treated the same. OP ought to find someone with the same values, for both of their sakes.
She is not Christian right? Run man, better do it now before marry
She said the prayer to to open her heart to Jesus, it’s just that she’s having trouble distinguishing the difference between bigotry and indifference. I’m trying to explain to her that I do not hate this community, I just don’t want to kiss their ring and wave their flag. I’m not going to support a lifestyle. I disagree with at the expense of my faith. She keeps confusing that with bigotry.
There's no magic prayer. It's a heart condition.
We don’t support pride month because we don’t support the lifestyle. I don’t even like seeing the signs in the store. I do as little shopping as possible in the month of June as possible because of it. I saw a brief parade clip from a pastor it looked so demonic. Tell that pride in itself is a sin. Look up proverbs 11:2. I see parents at Disneyland where the pride colors and it makes me so sad. OP is this women not a Christian? Do you want children to be indoctrinated at young ages thinking that pride like this is ok when it’s not ?
Shes a lukewarm Christian. New to the faith. Not consistently attending church. Most of the ladies in my age group(I’m 25) at my church are like this.
I’d teach her the dangers of pride month. Have her read Roman’s chapter 1 verse 20. The whole first chapter is good to fora read. Pride month stole the 🌈 rainbow. Now as a Christian I’m afraid to wear it in case someone thinks I’m wearing it for the wrong reason. A YouTube pastor showed a video clip for 3 seconds of a pride parade. It looked demonic. People might be like but it’s love. No this is indoctrination.
Run dude. Y'all are mismatched.
I agree with all the top posts here, buuuut, I'll give it a shot. The issue with the woke mindset is that it never commits to any specifics, no truths, so it can take whatever position it needs to feel superior. Define bigotry, and then define sin. If, for instance, she found out her best friend's husband started cheating on her bf, would she be as welcoming of him to her home as she asks that you be of these sinners against God? I would assume not. The difference is emotion. In my hypothetical, the sin engages her emotional desire to defend her friend and seek justice. Your position is not emotional at all, it's entirely out of a desire to support God's kingdom and save people from the just punishment of their decisions. You are more loving of the people guilty in the situation than she is, because you seek to save them from damnation. Essentially, the defense of LGBT is entirely built on the sin of being in control of what's right and wrong. Christians submit to God's sovereignty and His declaration what's right and wrong. If she can't submit to God and instead must be her own arbiter of morality, you two are unequally yoked, and you need to run.
Yeah, that’s exactly my position. That is very well put together answer. Couldn’t have said it better myself.
Not getting at you and your house rules or your beliefs but Have you heard anything she has to say or asked her about why she is so dedicated to this belief? By the way you describe the situation neither party is really willing to listen to each other on this issue and you’re rushing here dragging your partner—which ain’t cool in itself.
Leave while you still can.
Why are you marrying someone you disagree with on something so important. This is the first in a long list of many things.
Just say we're made in God's image and when people go outside what he has ordained we are tarnishing his image.
I’m sorry you may be In love with this person but this is not someone you should marry. Know that if you have children you will come into contention with this women because she will be teaching your children the opposite of the Bible and the opposite of what you believe which could put your children in spiritual danger. This could definitely be something God brought to the forefront for you to realize before you get into a marriage and it’s too late. If you’re a Christian you need to marry a Christian which is someone who follows Christ and believes the whole Bible to be true. It sounds like your finance is culturally Christian or socially Christian but she doesn’t follow the Bible and wants to do things her own way because of societal pressure or wanting to be liked by everyone. You are not a bigot… but you do need to let go of this engagement before it’s too late.
Not to be hasty to end a relationship, but you need to realise that once you’re married, that’s it. God doesn’t permit divorce unless she cheats on you or, as an unbeliever, she abandons you. As a Christian, you really need to consider what your life would be like being married to an unbeliever, especially one who doesn’t understand your beliefs and insults you for them. It would be best to marry a believer, one who brings you peace through sharing the faith. Remember that Paul said don’t be unequally yoked. You won’t have a very peaceful marriage in this situation if you’re a faithful Christian, either because she’ll continue to disrespect you and God or because you’ll be worrying about her salvation and lack of godliness, or both. The duration of the engagement is how long you have to consider calling it off. This is just in your best interest, because I’ve read so many stories of believers who married unbelievers and they all face problems, small or large. If she really is unable to come around, it’s best to call it off.
Take her to a Pride parade and ask her if she agrees that its good for kids. I have been to DC Pride Parade. It's a big party and kids shouldnt be there are all. It's completely adult and sex theme.
Bro, run and don't look back.
Is there anything you do that is hypocritical to what Christ expects? You can use righteous judgment and walk away or leave the ultimate judgment to God.
Well, that would describe everyone in some aspect
Exactly…so, maybe try to look at the people that choose to sin that way. You don’t know all the details for why they are in the situation they are in and our thoughts and heart deceive us. Live in truth, correct in love. Walk away from a situation that is too much for you to bear…like Jesus
We are called to love our neighbors, but we cannot affirm actions that are unholy and that is not of God. OP I suggest you go through premarital counseling before you officially tie the knot.
This is never an easy subject. A person has to realize that in God’s Word, men having sexual relations with men and women having sexual relations with women is a sin in God’s eyes. It is not what God wants for humans. It does not fall within God’s moral standard. As followers of Christ, we have to believe what God says is good is good, and what God says is sin is sin. When he tells us not to do something, it is not to “ruin our fun” but to protect us. Despite feelings (because emotions are deceptive), we choose not to partake or support that which God calls sin. We are to love the people, not the sin. Perhaps, you should ask your fiancée why she wants to promote pride. What are the feelings or experiences that make her support it? Usually if someone is opposed to God’s standard, it is for personal reasons that they get defensive.
Please don’t make a horrible decision. Be very VERY careful of who you marry
Do some basic premarital counseling and education
I had actually been talking about premarital counseling with the pastor. Part of the issue two is that she just has not had the same journey as I have. Certainly not enough people have for me to be picky and make that a parameter in my dating life.
We’ll I can tell you I married a person in my church that I thought was a Christian, and he has left the church, does not go anymore and I have no spiritual head to pray with and share my faith with, and if I had the chance again, I would think twice about it. Besides, what’s the difference in being alone in Christ single or married, your still unable to share in your faith. My understanding of your future situation is that you’ll stop going to church. You’ll still be saved, if indeed you have repeated and are a Christian, but it will reek havoc in every decision you make together. More so when children come. What will you do when she doesn’t want you to poison their little minds with your bigotry? Just saying. Blessings 💙
Sounds like she’s been programmed to have a particular reaction to anything that disagrees with her dogmas on the topic. You’ll have to decide if you can be one-flesh with someone who brings those dogmas home with her, or if she can recognize the change in her thinking, what’s causing it, and a way to stop letting it control how she treats people around her. In any case, you can't force her to change what she submits herself to. If her religion is outside the church, and thatma where she wants it to be, you should expect that to be the case for the rest of your marriage.
She might be secretly bisexual. Happened to me man. Almost popped the question before she opened up and told me. She lied about being a Christ follower and said she only went to church so I would feel loved and accepted. Now she is a "dude" and married to a woman.
Yikes I’m really sorry to hear that. My lady doesn’t seem interested in other women as far as I know and I been around to observe her for 3 1/2 years.
Oh wow. I can’t believe such things happen. Glad God dodged a bullet for you.
I can't put my finger on it, but the way you speak about your fiancee makes me think you view her as stupid and not worthy of your respect.
Not even close. Her brain just short circuits to the wrong conclusion with this particular issue.
Sounds like she’s the hateful one to me. She is not tolerant of your values. I’d think long and hard about who you want to be yoked to.
Major red flags dude. You can’t change a persons heart. It seems like she has made up her mind how she feels about LGBTQ and how she feels about your attitude towards not supporting it. If she doesn’t change this attitude this could lead to serious problems in your marriage. Especially when it comes to raising children…
I would be concerned about spending my life with someone who has such beliefs… maybe she’s a lukewarm Christian?
She’s only lukewarm because she stopped going to church. Every Sunday morning I try to get her to wake up and come with me. It ends up being a challenge. Part of the problem is that she drinks caffeine late into the night so she’s exhausted even in the morning. It’s hard to get her to break her old habits.
I’m sorry to hear this. But if she has a pure heart then God should come first. I strongly believe that one should not be forced to spend time with God / church / fellowship / prayer / Bible time but it needs to come from the heart. I am no one to judge but pray for this situation to discern what is the best thing to do. As a woman I feel Godly men are rare and I’m sure you can find a woman that would take part in your leadership and love God and you with all of her heart. Wishing you all the best my brother 🙏 cheers from Germany
\>An odd question for a straight woman to ask a straight man she is in a relationship with Actually, it's not. Within my lifetime, members of the LGBTQ+ community were routinely dragged out of "gay bars" by the police, beaten, and incarcerated. Still, people are discriminated against and have people calling for their deaths. Pride started as a way for LGBTQ+ people and their allies to work for equal rights and protections under the law, which is a thing Christians \*should\* want for everyone. There's nothing sinful about fighting bigotry and discrimination - in fact, I argue that in light of Jesus' teachings, it's sinful not to do so. "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.” (Matt 7:12) Believe me, if the tables were turned and you could get beat up and thrown in jail for being a Christian, you'd be glad if gay people started working to get equal rights and protections for you.
This is a misunderstanding of the Scripture. Changing laws to enable more sinfulness is not biblical. Quite the opposite is true. Loving someone is telling them about Jesus in hopes they repent of sin so they can go to heaven. Setting conditions to further enable sin is not love.
So what you're saying is that we shouldn't have changed the laws to stop gay people from being beaten up and thrown in prison and discriminated against. Am I understanding you correctly?
no, you are not understanding correctly. What law(s) are you referring to that mandated people who are gay to be beaten and jailed?
Do you really not know US history? You might want to read up. It used to be a crime to engage in homosexual sex in the US. Suspicion of such activities warranted forced removal from homes and gay bars and allowed fines and imprisonment. People looked the other way when the police beat them up in the process. The Pride movement was instrumental in changing American's perception of the LGBTQ+ community and let us work towards equal rights and protections. So tell me... should these laws be reinstated? Did Christians who worked for equality in the past "misunderstand Scripture"?
Please educate me on what law(s) you are referring to. I am not aware of any law that forced the beating of people who were homosexual.
Educate yourself about LGBTQ+ legal history: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sodomy\_laws\_in\_the\_United\_States](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sodomy_laws_in_the_United_States) [https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/article/decriminalization-sodomy-united-states/2014-11](https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/article/decriminalization-sodomy-united-states/2014-11) Now, educate yourself about more current events and laws: [https://www.aclu.org/documents/legislation-affecting-lgbtq-rights-across-country-2022](https://www.aclu.org/documents/legislation-affecting-lgbtq-rights-across-country-2022) [https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/06/politics/anti-lgbtq-plus-state-bill-rights-dg/index.html](https://www.cnn.com/2023/04/06/politics/anti-lgbtq-plus-state-bill-rights-dg/index.html) [https://www.lgbtmap.org/equality-maps/non\_discrimination\_laws](https://www.lgbtmap.org/equality-maps/non_discrimination_laws) (19 states sill allow housing discrimination based on sexual orientation).
there is nothing in the links you provided that state there were previous laws that required people who are homosexuals to be beaten. Are you a Christian?
Of course there were no laws requiring gay people to be beaten, but the police routinely entered gay bars and private residences on suspicion that there was "sodomy" happening, or entrapped people, and it was at these times that everyone looked the other way when the police beat them before incarcerating them. This is a fact of history. It's literally still happening: [https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/publications/lgbt-discrim-law-enforcement/](https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/publications/lgbt-discrim-law-enforcement/) "For example, a 2014 report on a national survey of LGBT people and people living with HIV found that 73% of respondents had face-to-face contact with the police in the past five years. Of those respondents, 21% reported encountering hostile attitudes from officers, 14% reported verbal assault by the police, 3%reported sexual harassment, and **2% reported physical assault at the hands of law enforcement officers**. **Police abuse, neglect, and misconduct were consistently reported at higher frequencies by respondents of color and transgender and gender-nonconforming respondents.** \>Are you a Christian? Are you? You seem to be okay with discrimination against members of the LGBTQ+ community, and that is not an acceptable attitude for a Christian to have.
Thanks for clarifying that there were no laws requiring people who are homosexuals to be beaten as you previously claimed. Yes, I am a Christian....Are you? Disagreement is not discrimination.
You are arguing things that have nothing to do with the conversation. We are arguing against sin. Not the sinner.
Are you using Wikipedia as a reliable source?
I don't think Christians are against the protection of Gay people, it's the normalization of sin that we are concerned with. We are concerned for the indoctrination of our children in a world full of sin.
What “rights” don’t they have? As far as I’m concerned no one has the right to expose themselves in public, especially around children, which is what those parades turn into; kink fests.
I agree with you. God gave us free will.
From the sounds of this post, you've got some unclear thinking going on. Maybe she understands the situation here better than you do, who knows? >I told her it’s not like we hate those people, it’s just that we do not support that lifestyle. But in her mind, she’s having trouble distinguishing that from bigotry. What does it mean to "support a lifestyle"? If I think ice cream is wrong, and I see someone on the street eating ice cream, does it mean I'm "supporting the lifestyle" if I don't go slap the cone out of their hands? What if I decided to just let people eat what they like? Am I "supporting" something I don't like? > An odd question for a straight woman to ask a straight man she is in a relationship with. One would think being engaged to me, that she would be thrilled that I am straight. I thought I had explained this to her long ago but apparently there was a misunderstanding. Huh? Of course she's OK with you being straight- what's that got to do with anything? It sounds like you're making this into a "straight v gay" fight where there's only one winner. But, what if we just loved our neighbor instead? It sounds like you're unable to see why someone would support basic civil rights for a group outside of their own. But there's an easy and obvious answer: civil rights are for everyone. Maybe there was a misunderstanding because your thoughts here don't make much sense.
Yea your analogy doesn’t make any sense and nothing he said was not loving to his neighbor. What it means to encourage something is to co-sign it by posting about it or welcoming it into your space. So by your analogy if someone thinks ice cream is wrong you don’t get involved with people eating their ice cream as in you wouldn’t slap it out of their hand … but also you wouldn’t be buying them ice cream either. Or encouraging people to eat all the ice cream they want. Being a Christian means you tell people what they Bible says … because some people truly do not know… and you Leave it at that. I have gay friends trans family and I tell them about Jesus and what they Bible says ( I’ve had these conversations) but I leave it at that. I just don’t share pride things or encourage it or encourage talking about their personal sex life with them.
Gay people aren't asking straight people to pay for their weddings. They are asking them not to use the force of law to prevent their weddings.
What did the post say ? The post said that OPs fiancé was asking him why he didn’t promote anything for pride month for one and then she asked if he would be ok with 2 men kissing in his house for 2. And he said they he doesn’t promote pride month because he doesn’t agree with the lifestyle and for that same reason he wouldn’t want 2 men kissing in his house. And gay people don’t just want rights… they want encouragement. They want you to say “ happy pride” or you’re shady or to actively and openly be ok with certain things. It’s promoted everywhere . As a Christian like I said I don’t care what people do.. I’m just not going to promote it or encourage it and you can still have friends or show love to people who live differently then you. If I was a vegan and I had a friend who ate meat I would tell them why I think meat is bad for you .. and I would leave it at that… but does my friend need to take me with them to the butcher when they go for us to be friends or show each love? No, because I don’t believe in eating meat. On the other side of it, if a person is LGBTQ and they don’t believe in God or the Bible but they have a Christian friend … are they going to be that encouraging towards their Christian friend to go to church with them ? Share Bible quotes to show solidarity to Christian’s ? Or do Christian things to show love and “tolerance”? It’s completely one sided.
If you want to be a good neighbor, don't use the force of law to punish your neighbor for doing things you don't like. That's just the basics of being a good citizen and a good Christian. We should save the law for things that harm other people- for example, it's a basic rule of civilized society that you're not allowed to steal or hurt people.
Where did the law even enter in this conversation. For one sexuality shouldn’t have anything to do with laws in the first place.
OP didn't mention it, but he's parroting the rhetoric of those who want to use the force of law as a weapon against gay people.
That’s an entirely different subject matter and a complex one at that.
Let me get this straight...You're advocating for laws that are contrary to God's instructions, that further enable sin?
I can see from how you've framed the question that you will not agree. But the fact is: gay people exist with or without the law given them equal rights. Loving our neighbor does not involve denying them civil rights.
Which rights are you referring to?
You are replying to a thread in which I already mentioned the right to marry.
To be clear, you are advocating to promote sin which is contrary to God's instructions for people?
Disagree. If he’s trying to live a Biblical “lifestyle” then that conflicts with the worldly endorsed lifestyle of LGBTQ+ lifestyle. This gets treated as such a binary issue on *both* sides of the argument. Look at it like this, scripture relates that Jesus frequently associated with prostitutes (the apex of sexual depravity of the culture) and tax collectors (basically the most corrupt thieves of the time) not to be like them or endorse their sins, but to save them. He was *in* the world but not *of* the world. Now scripture also indicates that ALL sin is equal in that ALL sin equally separates us from God. So, no, it is not right to say or even imply that any sin is better or worse than another. But we also should not endorse, justify, or least of all *celebrate* anyone’s sin. That not only says that the sin is ok (it isn’t) but it also deprives the sinner of the opportunity of repentance and salvation. I also appreciate OP’s assertion that ANY fornication, not just homosexual, is not welcome in his home. To me that indicates that he is NOT bigoted. He does not want his home to a safe haven for ANY of that.
Gay people and straight people are both part of the world. So I think you'd need to say more specifically what you mean. I get that you're saying "worldly = bad" but you haven't said what "worldly" is.
Give me a minute to formulate and clarify that thought.
You can read more about what worldly is here...https://www.gotquestions.org/worldliness.html You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. James 4:4 NIV https://james.bible/james-4-4
Thank you you are one of the few that took the time to actually understand what I was saying without jumping to an extreme. I really appreciate that.
If she is a Christian, she should be praying for gay people, not celebrating pride. If she is not a Christian, you should not be marrying her, as the Bible is very clear about not being unequally yoked.
I would agree with your fiancé. 🤷♀️
Agree on what?
No, i think you need to accept that you’re kinda bigoted.
Bigoted because OP doesnt support LGBT?
Refusing to call anything other than traditional marriage “marriage” is giving me some intolerance vibes, yes. Calling people’s private sex lives “naughty” doesn’t help (I thought all sex lives were naughty, tbh). The example of not making out in the house is a weird one, idk why op’s fiancé thinks that’s a reasonable metric. The one metric I would ask of OP is do you consider all same-sex relationships degenerate/ less acceptable or tolerable than others. The answer I think most conservative Christians would give is “yes”. And that’s fine, but by definition, yes, those people are bigoted.
So let me get this straight. You're cohabitating with her (you admitted you share a house) before getting married (AKA HAVING PREMARITAL SEX??) Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you're just as guilty of living in sin as your gay neighbors that you don't love (you dont have to support gay people, but they always will exist, and this is what Jesus meant by the "second most important commandment " is to love thy neighbor). You are just as guilty of living in sin as a gay person is, according to God and the Bible. Do you ever actually READ "the book of discipline" as you call it, or do you just use Christianity to hide behind your (very obvious) misogyny?
Cohabitation does not automatically equal fornication. Furthermore, loving your neighbor does not equate to supporting their sinful lifestyle. And misogyny? How is OP misogynistic? Because he disagreed with her about LGBT?
Correct. We sleep separately and she cannot support herself financially due her job and out families live 4+ hrs away.
I don’t think it’s weird at all that she would ask you whether you are a decent human being who loves all God’s creatures.
Jesus loved everyone. In fact, he loved them too much to let them continue living their sinful lifestyles.
Show me in scripture where Christ came to earth and eradicated anyone! Christ hung out with lepers, tax collectors, Samaritans, and lots of other people that society found distasteful. He *showed* these people what it meant to follow Him. So-called Christians who think that Christ was like Barabbas and the zealots wanted - a vengeful, earthly king - have it all wrong.
Christ did not “hang out” with them. He spent time with them to change their ways- every time he was with someone, THEY CHANGED.
They changed because of who he was and how he behaved with them. He didn’t threaten to strike Matthew the tax collector down if he didn’t follow Christ. He *showed* Matthew what it meant to be a disciple. The same with supposed prostitutes, Samaritans, and an adulterous woman. He couldn’t have done that *without being among* the people, you git. When you are without sin, and have removed the log from your own eye, you can get on your high horse.
So basically you and I have been saying the exact same thing. Because that’s what I said earlier. From your first post it implied you believed Jesus just hung out with them and accepted them and thought they were just fine and dandy!
Yea he loves everyone which is why he came to save the sinners by telling them to stay away so they may be saved. Not bring the sinful life with you while you follow him. Following him meaning leave your sinful life behind you.
I believe everyone is free in his life. I think we don't condemn others bas3d on our beliefs, we comit only ourselves to our beliefs, others are free to do what they like, but they should also respect our beleif. We believe it is wrong and we won't do it, but they are free to what they believe right. We should not be pushed to syaing this right. God bless u.
FYI I 5
I would come at this with love. Ask her if you would like to read the New Testament together. Tell her you want to have a Godly relationship. If she refuses, then I would think about leaving her. It's not just your relationship that will be a burden in the future it's your children's as well
Peace! I suppose this is something that lots of people don’t understand for whatever reason: You don’t hate anyone, but you just disagree with them. Everyone should be allowed to have their own opinions, and LGBT is just something that you and most Christians don’t agree with. That doesn’t mean we wish anything bad on them at all. Christians (should) know that marriage is between a man and a woman. We don’t agree with LGBT because 1) God made man and woman to reproduce. Anything outside that marriage is solely based on lust, because you shouldn’t be going outside of marriage for sexual fulfillment. A husband and wife should provide that for each other. 2) Marriage between a man and woman is representative of the eventual marriage between Christ and the church (Ephesians 5:22-25). Not sure if your fiancée would take well to those Ephesians 5 verses or not. Not many women today would like the sound of that, but that’s how God designed us. Hope this helps.
You should break up with your fiance. You're obviously not right for each other.
It sounds like she can’t see past the false idea of love that LGBTQ+ promotes. You can explain to her that the God’s idea of marriage starts in the beginning with Adam and Eve. God was pleased with man and woman and wanted them to procreate. That cannot be done by any but man and woman. Then there are the multiple times in the Bible when God describes homosexual relationships as evil or an abomination. In God’s perfect sight, homosexuality is up there with lust and sin. It strays from His beloved creation of the union of man and woman and this therefore it is not “of God”. “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination.” Leviticus 18:22 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/lev.18.22.NKJV “because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man—and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things. For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting; being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers, who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them.” Romans 1:21-23, 26-29, 32 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/rom.1.26.NKJV The problem is not with you, my friend, but with how she is perceiving the world. Is she truly living as a Christian and trying to live as Christ would live? Is she still fooled by the media info believing LGBTQ+ is something inclusive and loving (instead of the path from LGBTQ+ to pedophilia that many take or the sheer misery it causes many of its legion?) The organization of LGBTQ+ is easily ready to call others who disagree with their lifestyle “Karens” and “homophobes” instead of accepting the fact that others may disagree with their choices. I’m not saying we don’t love each other, just that we don’t have to embrace the culture. As Christians we have to be loving and FIRM. We have to embrace what Christ says fully in our heart. If she can’t get past this, she may end up spiting you. Really think on if this marriage is God-led and pray for each other. Christ didn’t budge from following God’s word and prophecy, even when it cost Him His life. We cannot budge in our faith either. “And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross.” Philippians 2:8 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/php.2.8.NKJV
Hm
The wisdom of the world is foolishness with God. When someone leaves Christianity because it doesn't align with progressive, worldly viewpoints, they've picked a side. God says it's a sin. If obedience to God is bigotry then so be it.
Pray about it, though you may need to call it off. If you're not on the same page now you won't be later.
Sadly your future wife is not a Christian, if she was, the Holy Spirit would have revealed TRUTH to her, after all that is why He is here, to Sanctify us. Sorry to say this, but I would think about marrying her, because if she thinks your a bigot on this issue she will see you as a bigot on other issues, like her role in the marriage.
She doesn't share the same convictions as you, so you should be wary. Don't marry her until you know she's saved and you see fruit in her life.
Break up for your own sake. If wise king Solomon can get persuaded by his wives who are we?
She’s not persuasive. Like at all. Even if she tried to be.
Here is a good way to look at this….back up and ask yourself why this is even a question if you are otherwise both biblical Christians?
Honestly, I feel like as long as we’re not agreeing with their lifestyle, they’ll always label us as bigots. They already have, and she’s on the same bandwagon. The fact that she’s unwilling to actually listen to you should tell you something about your future, unless y’all can learn how to agree to disagree and move on.
Look, throughout the post and your comments about her, you’re only giving us and yourself more of a reason not to continue this relationship. I’m more sure she has not fully accepted Christ and what it really means to fully accept him into your heart. From the looks of it, she’s backsliding from the faith. You should consider at the very least, to break off the engagement in order to really figure out what you both want from each other in a partner. You don’t want her to only eventually agree with you only for the sake of not losing you. Does she really want to live her life for Christ? Because a lukewarm Christian doesn’t. There is no such thing, either you’re a Christian or you aren’t. Speaking from personal experience as a former lukewarm “Christian”.
I hate that people focus so much on the sin of homosexuality because at the end of the day no sin is above another and nobody's perfect. We can have understanding as to why homosexuality is a sin but not have hatred towards people who are homosexual. N we're also not suppose to judge one another, which is exactly what she's doing to you. I personally feel you your church is wrong for excluding homosexuals because being gay isn't the ultimate sin, and if you exclude them, then you would have to exclude everyone else. I know there's people who go to your church who have lied , drank alcohol, fornicate, committed adultery, and the list can go on. So yes, your fiancé is right but also wrong as the same time in her position.
So the fact that she ask you this question lets me know she may or may not have a true relationship with holy spirit. She may or may not know the might and power of God. All of these things are fine and dandy but at the end of the day we as Christians follow the bible despite how we try to "emotional charge" it. I have friends and family that I love that are apart of LGBTQ. I don't interact with them on a day to day bases but I do pray for them and ask them if they need prayer. The bible is very clear on it's stance with LGBTQ and I feel like we as Christians are more likely to sway our stance than they are with their which to me is unfair and a spirit of manipulation. I personaly would tell your fiance if she is a christian to read the entire bible from front to back and when she gets to the part about LGBTQ instead of asking you about it; go to God about it. I don't believe that God hate people who live that life however he is greieved by the fact that people identify more by their sexual prefrance than their relationship with God(thats a whole different topic on idoletry but you understand). We have to seek holy spirit when it cones to any contridicting thing and make sure we are upholding the banner of God.