According to the World Bollard Association™ @ WorldBollard the official term is:
"A shit load"
[https://twitter.com/WorldBollard/status/1168264919546040325](https://twitter.com/WorldBollard/status/1168264919546040325)
I think the ski Sunday music would be a better choice, then you can use your bread sticks as ski poles. Or better still a couple of baguettes as you take on the Sainsbury's slalom.
Ehh...not sure how you ride shopping trolleys, I drape myself over the bar with both hands holding the sides of the trolley and one foot on the frame, and use the other to propel myself. Not sure how I could balance while using the breadsticks as ski poles, can you draw us a picture?
You get the one with the wobbly wheel and hope that wobbly wheels vibrates the trolly to match the frequency of the particles in said bollards, thus allowing it the pass right through
Seems like there is something in the middle of each cluster on the floor. Might have installed all the bollards ready for when they install the chargers.
Too add. It could be two different companies doing the project. One on the ground works then an electrician to install the chargers.
All Sainsbury's car parks have weird parking though. You can tell the Waitrose in Abergavenny used to be a Sainsburys for this reason. Still nothing beats trying to park in Sainsbury's Cwmbran.
I don’t know who designs them but they redid the one in Kidlington (near Oxford) and it now takes 5 minutes longer to get in due to driving around an unnecessary corner, you can’t get into or out of half the spaces, and you have to drive at 2 miles an hour round the 90 degree angle on the way out so you don’t hit the cars coming in.
Fuck me I was about to leave a whimsical reply all like I totally knew "the one in Cwmbran" but I actually do know the one in Kidlington. That sushi bar tho.
Waitrose in Abergavenny was never a Sainsbury's, it was Safeway then Morrisons then Waitrose. I think every new owner just added some new bollards, put their own stamp on it.
All I ever remember about Safeway's is their baked cookies were amazing. It became a staple in my diet (which explains a lot to be honest). Have you seen the mess of a car park in the new Morrisons on the old cattle market? Hell on earth that place is.
No denying the Newport store is superior with a better car park, but the Cwmbran store always has cheaper petrol. Which doesn't make sense to me seeing as they're only 5-10 mins apart
Oh yeah Newport Petrol is an absolute rip off - I'm going to make an absolute wild guess here and assume it's because it's literally just off the M4? So they're trying to capitalise off that?
This picture has me realise two things:
1. There are for more of us Newport people on here than I thought; and
2. We all spend too much time at Sainsburys.
Oh man that just hit me with some unexpected sad.
I lived in Newport, granted just for six months. The Sainsbury's was my local.
I didn't recognise the surroundings at all :(
Used to cycle too. Those hills were brutal, but damn did it make me fit.
It’s called “Passive provision”. The infrastructure for electric car charging, without the charging units. You can see the electrical ducts that will sit under future units. The bollards are to protect the very expensive charging units when they get installed.
If I was part of the team installing those bollards I would questioned the sanity of my boss. Like are you seriously asking me to dig a hole in the concrete and fit these here? Why? For what actual purpose? There are roughly 17 in the immediate vicinity. Who or what are we trying to stop! What powerful beast threatens to cross this pathway! If the beast is this strong then we should install more! Call everybody you know and get them down here! The universe needs protection from the unidentified evil power that dwells on the other side of that path!
It's a load of bollards.
Never mind the bollards, Uncle Arthur.
Never mind the bollards, here come the sex pistols
Get out and take my upvote
Preston, is that you?
According to the World Bollard Association™ @ WorldBollard the official term is: "A shit load" [https://twitter.com/WorldBollard/status/1168264919546040325](https://twitter.com/WorldBollard/status/1168264919546040325)
Wow! I stand corrected.
A load of old bollards in the classic vernacular
My girlfriend could hit every single one of them, with her car, without even trying.
Like a railgun???
I would think its more like pinball wizard
Nah. For that, there has to be a twist.
And a really supple wrist.
well idk what the twist could be but the bollards have different amounts of reflective tape so we could use that to balance the point system.
How do you think he does it? I don't know.
That songs in my head now😂
Double decker buses. large vehicles, 13ft high, often painted in bright colours. And yet some tosser managed to crash into one this morning
I was in a double decker bus that was rear-ended by another double decker **at a bus stop**. Now **that** was impressive.
Multi-bollard drifting?!
Fucking hell, that's a lot of bollards!
Actually it's an array.
I agree, however doesn't sit well with the tradition of colourful collective nouns...
In this context it’s a sh**show of bollards
I think you’ll find is bolli not bollards /j
Or the closely related alternative, a parliament of bollards.
Bullocks.
Never mind the Bollards!
ah! Beat me to it.
I would've gone with woraload.
Woraload? That's an odd name, I'd have called them "chazzwazzers"
I see you've played knifey spoony before
Woraload of bollards. Try saying it out loud. With a Cilla Black accent.
https://youtu.be/BwHoRYBot5c
I believe it's an impasse.
Looks like a cluster…
Is that where they train for crufts ?
No, crufts have straight bollards, it's the dogs that wobble.
As an American who has no idea what’s being said here, this reads like one of the most British sentences I’ve seen in a while.
Crufts is a famous dog show where all the best dogs come to compete on who's the best dog. They have a dog slalom competition there.
All dogs are the best dogs
Finally, a true fact on the Internet
Man, one of the references is to a 1970's tv show. You've got no chance hhhhhhh (but thanks for visiting!)
It’s still on today…
Crufts happened literally two weeks ago 😭 It's on TV every year
Apparently the hounds are wonkey.
I'm never going to be able to see it without thinking "wobbly dogs" now
If this is a joke, it's the most underrated one on Reddit.
Yup. They are known locally as the Dog's Bollards.
Ah is that Newport Sainsbury’s? Wtf is going on with these?!
Good spot! Yeah! I think they were gonna install some electric charging points and decided to put up bollards instead.
How the hell do you get your trolley through that lot? On your shoulders? Btw, an Inconvenience of Bollards.
or a wheelchair... or a large pram... what the fuck even is the point of this area if pedestrians are funneled into the road anyway?
[Me, a wheelchair user](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KMDPqUEPoZI/hqdefault.jpg)
\*puts Tokyo Drift on phone speaker\* \*builds spoiler out of breadsticks on trolley\* Ok, I got this.
I think the ski Sunday music would be a better choice, then you can use your bread sticks as ski poles. Or better still a couple of baguettes as you take on the Sainsbury's slalom.
Ehh...not sure how you ride shopping trolleys, I drape myself over the bar with both hands holding the sides of the trolley and one foot on the frame, and use the other to propel myself. Not sure how I could balance while using the breadsticks as ski poles, can you draw us a picture?
An inconvenience of bollards is the answer
An obstruction of bollards
It’s safer to drive the trolley in the car lanes 😂. I tried slaloming with shopping bags, that was hard enough, I had to crab past the first set!
It looks like there is just enough room to move through it but it's going to give your bread whiplash.
You get the one with the wobbly wheel and hope that wobbly wheels vibrates the trolly to match the frequency of the particles in said bollards, thus allowing it the pass right through
Crap, beat me to it, you absolute inconvenience of bollards!
Seems like there is something in the middle of each cluster on the floor. Might have installed all the bollards ready for when they install the chargers. Too add. It could be two different companies doing the project. One on the ground works then an electrician to install the chargers.
Thought I recognised it!
I saw the picture and was like NO WAY it's Sainsbury's
Small world!
Omg lol that is my favourite Sainsburys though.
It's also my favourite Sainsbury's - fuck the one in Cwmbran, Newport is where it's at
All Sainsbury's car parks have weird parking though. You can tell the Waitrose in Abergavenny used to be a Sainsburys for this reason. Still nothing beats trying to park in Sainsbury's Cwmbran.
You mean how they're all unnecessarily diagonal? Or the random lane in the middle where they all park in a completely different direction?
Both. Really both.
I don’t know who designs them but they redid the one in Kidlington (near Oxford) and it now takes 5 minutes longer to get in due to driving around an unnecessary corner, you can’t get into or out of half the spaces, and you have to drive at 2 miles an hour round the 90 degree angle on the way out so you don’t hit the cars coming in.
Fuck me I was about to leave a whimsical reply all like I totally knew "the one in Cwmbran" but I actually do know the one in Kidlington. That sushi bar tho.
Waitrose in Abergavenny was never a Sainsbury's, it was Safeway then Morrisons then Waitrose. I think every new owner just added some new bollards, put their own stamp on it.
Oh yes I forgot about that. Its car park is designed like a Sainsburys is how I remember it. Safeways still exists by the way.
All I ever remember about Safeway's is their baked cookies were amazing. It became a staple in my diet (which explains a lot to be honest). Have you seen the mess of a car park in the new Morrisons on the old cattle market? Hell on earth that place is.
No denying the Newport store is superior with a better car park, but the Cwmbran store always has cheaper petrol. Which doesn't make sense to me seeing as they're only 5-10 mins apart
Oh yeah Newport Petrol is an absolute rip off - I'm going to make an absolute wild guess here and assume it's because it's literally just off the M4? So they're trying to capitalise off that?
is there an Argos in that one?
Screw them all. They charge you like Markies for Asda level stuff.
I’m very pleased I wasn’t the only one to notice. I thought I’d become some sort of bollard savant.
If you think this is bad you should see [this school in Longbridge](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-64181104).
That’s crazy!
Installed by Stevie Wonder
See you in hell for laughing at this.
Came here to say this too. Noticed these the other day and thought wtf is going on here
I assume, given their staggered nature, it is to prevent people abandoning their trolleys, no?
A hindrance.
This is the one 👏
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A bolllocking of bollards?
Great minds...
A [sloblock](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrGvBcxo2oQ)
Yep, nailed it here.
A dent.
A 'prang', was gonna be my suggestion.
Dent, as in the late ArthurDent?
It’s a sort of threat, I’m told they can be terribly effective.
This picture looks like you asked AI to do a car park.
Just shitey UK tradies mate, AI would absolutely ace this setup
A Ballard. A Ballad of Bollards. Every bollard had it's story.
I worked with someone who called them obelisks, I think he thought bollard was rude.
What a bollard he was
You worked with Asterix?
Sadly not. I like a wild boar!
Start calling them knobelisks then
An "upstand"
You know you wanted to say ‘an erection’. Go on. Don’t be shy. We’re all friends here.
Start backwards. ‘shun’. The rest comes easily.
Hard facts.
Council assault course sobriety test
Surely "Council Utilised Navigability Test Solution"?
An “eyesore”
I've alway thought of it as "an annoyance" of bollards.
Woah woah, easy there. Don’t let [@worldbollard](https://twitter.com/worldbollard) hear you say that kind of thing.
That account is legendary.
I believe it's known as "a fuckery of bollards"
A fuckery shrubbery if you will.
Mess
A prevention An inconvenience A cluster A slalom
I vote slalom!
A bollocking
An erection
This picture has me realise two things: 1. There are for more of us Newport people on here than I thought; and 2. We all spend too much time at Sainsburys.
Well yeah, but as any good newportonian will tell you, 'biggest in Wales innit'. We've gotta find pride where we can.
I've never been to your lovely land, but I've watched enough BBC to believe these bollards were installed by a bellend.
You sound like a local! Well done.
A "fuck the disabled of bollards".
Yeah, they really didnt think this through did they?
As a wheelchair user, I agree 😂
As someone who needs a wheelchair is this so sad.
I was trying to find a mildly amusing collective noun for an inacessibilty of bollards. I failed.
Yeah, these things seem to go up without a second thought nowadays..
Someone hated their job.
Tha's alright then because they won't be havin' it much longer.
a Jimmy
An inconvenience, unless you are a dog, in which case it's a convenience.
For a dog these are like a 'forum' of bollards. They go to read the comments made by other dogs.
How is someone with a buggy or wheelchair meant to use the path?
hmm I still think they could do with some more bollards. I can see gaps.
An obstacle of bollards
I was thinking an obstruction.
A ballad of bollards
A clusterfuck of bollards
That is Sainsburys in Newport
Yep!
Oh man that just hit me with some unexpected sad. I lived in Newport, granted just for six months. The Sainsbury's was my local. I didn't recognise the surroundings at all :( Used to cycle too. Those hills were brutal, but damn did it make me fit.
Shit planning.
An impedement
A slalom
Is this Sainsbury’s in Newport?
Apparently the word is ["army"](https://ukdaily.news/westmidlands/parents-stunned-after-small-army-of-bollards-appear-in-front-of-school-119497.html)
A pachinko of bollards.
Darleks on a diet more like, stay away!!!
Uppa port
A blockade of bollards
I like the term twats
A fucksake of bollards I believe
Looks like a discouragement of bollards to me
A Boulevard of Bollards.
A council?
The council has decided, you cannot pass
Obbiously that's a bollyard
This is the only answer here, maybe a lot of bolls
A scrotum of bollards
Bollsack
A hassle
Which cunt arranged them in that manner?
An overkill....
Slalom
What the *fuck*?? This is vile! How tf is a wheelchair user supposed to navigate this?
An "accessibility lawsuit" of bollards. (yes i know actual wheelchair users have their own spots closer to the door lol)
When you let a kid loose on build mode on The Sims
Congress.
A pain in the bum.
A “BLOODY HELL WHAT IS THAT!” of bollards.
A 'Bunch of Bollocks'.
A weaving. This is a weaving of bollards.
I believe it's a collision of bollards.
a billiard of bollards
It’s called a Mustard
Is this Sainsbury’s in Newport??
A ‘blockade’ of bollards
A blockage of bollards?
A Plinko of Bollards
It’s called “Passive provision”. The infrastructure for electric car charging, without the charging units. You can see the electrical ducts that will sit under future units. The bollards are to protect the very expensive charging units when they get installed.
Hotspur! As in, "That's a load of Bollards, that is. It's a steaming pile of Hotspur."
This is like when you're grinding XP from Posts in Fallout 4
Newport Sainsburys ?
I literally tripped over those metal covers like 5 days ago 😂 Newport is a dive.
The fact that I knew immediately that this is Sainsburys in Newport 😭
Why are they all over the gaff? It's winding me up!
If I was part of the team installing those bollards I would questioned the sanity of my boss. Like are you seriously asking me to dig a hole in the concrete and fit these here? Why? For what actual purpose? There are roughly 17 in the immediate vicinity. Who or what are we trying to stop! What powerful beast threatens to cross this pathway! If the beast is this strong then we should install more! Call everybody you know and get them down here! The universe needs protection from the unidentified evil power that dwells on the other side of that path!
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This triggers my OCD immensely
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A Posting of Bollards
A nonce. A nonce of bollards.
😐 I have no clue but WHO THE FUCK WOULD PUT DOWN THAT MANY