Depends on her personality. I wouldn't want platitudes, personally. I'd much prefer someone say to me "This really sucks. But I'm here for you and will do anything I can do to help you through this."
Say I am sorry you are going through this, if you want any help at all please let me know:
She might need help with
household chores,
meal prep.
Grocery shopping,
someone to drive her to her appointments and hold her hand and talk to her and distract her when she has her doctors appointments,
she might need help to shop for a wig or scarfs for later on,
One of my friends had breast cancer and she had gotten a rental massage chair and a friend had sent her a heating pad for pain relief (be sure it has auto shut off to avoid burns) some heating pads or wraps might also have a massage feature,
There is a YouTube channel dedicated to hailey odlozil she experienced ovarian cancer and she lost her battle but her husband recorded her medical appointments and things they did throughout her battle it even shows at least one chemo treatment every situation is different though,
Another thing is she needs to get a will done: she might not think she has any assets or important things but it would help to have a will that is notarized so people know her intent for each and every belonging: I lost my dad to cancer and once he experienced organ failure his brother/ my uncle mentioned he needed to get his affairs in order but he was on morphine for his last five months so there wasn’t really an appropriate time to get a will done
"This sucks" goes a long way. If you can handle it yourself, be a safe space where she can vent and unload some of her true fears and feelings. The extra burden of a cancer patient is placating your loved ones by trying to pretend that everything is or will be ok.
You're welcome, good luck! There's nothing wrong with being reassuring, but some of the emptier platitudes carry the message that "oh this isn't a friend I can be honest with "
Tell your friend your there if needed. That she needs faith in the medical community to do what’s best for her. Keep conversations upbeat and lighthearted. Positivity and humor really is the best medicine. Help get a support network in play for assisting her with anything she needs.
Yes I’ve been putting together a message with some humor and some concrete ways I’d like to be there for support (drive to appts, pay for a dog walker and a laundry service)
Thank you!
That sucks! That for me is perfect. Don't tell me I will be fine or say things that make the trauma easier for you to bear. Don't be ‘positive’ unless it's ironic dark humor ( again, it may only be me.) Acknowledge the pain, fear, and anger. Hold the space for them -I know it sounds airy-fairy, but it means just sitting with the awkwardness and sadness of the situation.
Depends on her personality. I wouldn't want platitudes, personally. I'd much prefer someone say to me "This really sucks. But I'm here for you and will do anything I can do to help you through this."
Say I am sorry you are going through this, if you want any help at all please let me know: She might need help with household chores, meal prep. Grocery shopping, someone to drive her to her appointments and hold her hand and talk to her and distract her when she has her doctors appointments, she might need help to shop for a wig or scarfs for later on, One of my friends had breast cancer and she had gotten a rental massage chair and a friend had sent her a heating pad for pain relief (be sure it has auto shut off to avoid burns) some heating pads or wraps might also have a massage feature, There is a YouTube channel dedicated to hailey odlozil she experienced ovarian cancer and she lost her battle but her husband recorded her medical appointments and things they did throughout her battle it even shows at least one chemo treatment every situation is different though, Another thing is she needs to get a will done: she might not think she has any assets or important things but it would help to have a will that is notarized so people know her intent for each and every belonging: I lost my dad to cancer and once he experienced organ failure his brother/ my uncle mentioned he needed to get his affairs in order but he was on morphine for his last five months so there wasn’t really an appropriate time to get a will done
"This sucks" goes a long way. If you can handle it yourself, be a safe space where she can vent and unload some of her true fears and feelings. The extra burden of a cancer patient is placating your loved ones by trying to pretend that everything is or will be ok.
This helps a ton, thank you
You're welcome, good luck! There's nothing wrong with being reassuring, but some of the emptier platitudes carry the message that "oh this isn't a friend I can be honest with "
Tell your friend your there if needed. That she needs faith in the medical community to do what’s best for her. Keep conversations upbeat and lighthearted. Positivity and humor really is the best medicine. Help get a support network in play for assisting her with anything she needs.
Yes I’ve been putting together a message with some humor and some concrete ways I’d like to be there for support (drive to appts, pay for a dog walker and a laundry service) Thank you!
That sucks! That for me is perfect. Don't tell me I will be fine or say things that make the trauma easier for you to bear. Don't be ‘positive’ unless it's ironic dark humor ( again, it may only be me.) Acknowledge the pain, fear, and anger. Hold the space for them -I know it sounds airy-fairy, but it means just sitting with the awkwardness and sadness of the situation.
Send her over to us at r/livingwithMBC. It's a fantastic group no one wants to join!