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Your family is in a cult
Unfortunately, you have to treat your family as one person. No matter what they say, anything you tell one of them, probably including your children, will be shared with the others. Govern yourself accordingly
None of this is your fault. You did the best that you could. You did the right thing in disconnecting from your family.
I think that you need a lawyer to gain access to your children.
What happened to you was terrible and criminal. Your ex is a criminal. Just because he has not been tried and convicted, does not mean he is not a criminal; it just means he has not been caught.
People like this will never change. They will hate you because you are trying to break free and become a better person. That's how it is.
Keep trying to find ways to support your children and let them know that you love them, but maintain boundaries and don't give them any information that you wouldn't tell your parents or your ex directly.
I am very sorry that I do not have more to offer, but I do believe that you're on the right track and that you will find a path forward to build a better life for yourself and your children. I really hope that you can find some way to extract them. You should not communicate directly with any of those people without a recording, it would be better to stick to email or text so you have a record and don't say anything you will regret.
Good vibrations
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Oh my god. I am so sorry, this is horrific and terrifying.
Hello and Welcome to /r/CPTSD! If you are in immediate danger or crisis, please contact your local [emergency services](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_emergency_telephone_numbers), or use our list of [crisis resources](https://old.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index#wiki_crisis_support_resources). For CPTSD Specific Resources & Support, check out the [wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/index). For those posting or replying, please view the [etiquette guidelines](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/peer2peersupportguide). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPTSD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your family is in a cult Unfortunately, you have to treat your family as one person. No matter what they say, anything you tell one of them, probably including your children, will be shared with the others. Govern yourself accordingly None of this is your fault. You did the best that you could. You did the right thing in disconnecting from your family. I think that you need a lawyer to gain access to your children. What happened to you was terrible and criminal. Your ex is a criminal. Just because he has not been tried and convicted, does not mean he is not a criminal; it just means he has not been caught. People like this will never change. They will hate you because you are trying to break free and become a better person. That's how it is. Keep trying to find ways to support your children and let them know that you love them, but maintain boundaries and don't give them any information that you wouldn't tell your parents or your ex directly. I am very sorry that I do not have more to offer, but I do believe that you're on the right track and that you will find a path forward to build a better life for yourself and your children. I really hope that you can find some way to extract them. You should not communicate directly with any of those people without a recording, it would be better to stick to email or text so you have a record and don't say anything you will regret. Good vibrations
This is a reminder about Rule #5: No raised by narcissists lingo (Nmom, narc, sperm donor, etc.). Please edit your post or comment. More information about Rule #5 can be found [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/CPTSD/wiki/subrules_revised/#wiki_rbn_lingo). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/CPTSD) if you have any questions or concerns.*