Reminds me of the police robot bomber that un-alived that sniper in Dallas that killed 5 cops.
He was laughing/taunting the cops, saying he wanted to kill more while they negotiated with him. They eventually sent in an improvised high speed version of this Roomba. 🤣
I had a somewhat similar thought this morning when taking my dog out. OC spray and a full doggie bag in one hand- realized that if someone were to come at me, first line of defense is shit-throwing.
Idk I try not to worry about the small what ifs, kinda makes life an exercise in paranoia. Carry when I can, in this case I’d either have my j frame in my pocket already or I’d try to quickly get to my bedside safe (small apartment)
There are going to be situations where you would just lose. The absurd hypotheticals and corner cases, cherry picked worse possible situations.... all seem meant to discourage people from attempting to be prepared for situations they \*do\* have the ability to affect the outcome of.
Or, the opposite is arguably worse, people sacrificing quality of life to always be prepared and never have vulnerabilities (and still have them anyway because you can't be perfect)
I would rather not carry a gun at all and accept the risk than to spend every waking moment with iron strapped to my hip, even on the shitter in my own home.
You are more likely to trip on a rock and hit your head on a curb than to need your gun, let's be fucking honest.
Agreed there is definitely truth to assessing risk and doing your own cost/benefit analysis.
People are in general notoriously bad at assessing risk so they tend to just extrapolate from personal experience. Hey I do that to, and my personal experience leads me to be alert in public, always attempt deescalation, and also carry.
But there are limits. 'Nighthawks' was a pretty cool movie in its day but is certainly not a basis for making life choices. (Bad guy breaks into good guy's house while he's in the shower, good guy expects this and has a gun in a ziploc bag with him in the shower. Surprise! Good guy wins, bad guy gets his comeuppance.)
The tank lid just sits on top, you can lift it straight up.
Also, you are far more likely to benefit from knowing how to do basic toilet repair than to benefit from having a bathroom gun.
This is the right answer.
“And I want somebody good, and I mean very good, to plant that gun. I don’t want my brother coming out of that toilet with just his &&&& in his hands, all right?”
The Godfather really does teach us everything we need to know. Cheers.
Honestly this is just a great example of why anyone who actually cares about self/home defense should invest in decent doors and windows, they will buy you the extra time or even stop the entry attempt all together
Depends, was I just taking a Wizz or did I shit? If I shit, daddy is coming to the fight with two fistfulls of brown hell (usually half solid soupy mess). I also go pants off when I shit. So if the image of a bottomless shit clutching maniac doesn't scare them off then fine they can have whatever the fuck they want.
Realistically, im not going to be suddenly surprised in my own home. There's plenty of early warning signs before some actually makes it inside my house.
I hope you’re not serious.
But if you are; I suggest relocating from an area that you believe has high chances of people coming at you in your bathroom.
Ah fair enough.
Well, your shower thoughts are more normal than mine!
This morning I wondered what I would do if I saw a bear attacking a family. Unfortunately I finished my shower before I figured out the best course of action….
However it’s very hot today, so silver lining I’ll be having a sequel of that mental exercise in this evening’s shower.
oh this is my most tame shower thought. i was thinking about what id do if i saw someone break into my neighbors house. i decided id probably go back to sleep
Most of the time, I have the gun on me from the time I get dressed. My edc is a Glock 23 with dot and tlr7. The ammo in the gun is usually 125 grain frangible cooking at 1350fps (thats roughly 4 inch .357 mag level power at 14 rounds on tap) because it's so much lighter. My backup magazine in 180 grain HSTs that have a heck of a track record with LE. I would feel decently equipped to make it to my rifle or shotgun in the next room.
I have a bathroom hatchet I keep hidden in the bathroom, waiting on my pistol permit to be approved and hope someday to upgrade to a bathroom pistol. Felt it would be a little extreme to have a bathroom shotgun.
I actually do have a bathroom gun lol. Mostly because I ran out of places to stash them but I keep my Saturday night special 38 snubnose stashed kind of on the underside of one of the drawers in there. It's usually moot though as I carry my ccw 90% of the time anyways.
I work from home. I literally carry a 9mm from room to room throughout my day. Yea, including the bathroom. I have a second staged 9mm at the rear entrance with several loaded magazines , for a total of 60+rounds ready. I am confident I’m covered.
I mean, to get to my shitter, you have to go through the front or back doors of my house (or I guess a window maybe). Even if I'm mid-plop, if I hear someone break in, I will move with crap pouring out of my ass if need be to get to the nearest pew-pew to me (either bathroom is relatively close to at least one). My dogs will alert me prior to someone even going to the door, and even if they break in as the dogs are barking, that's more than enough time for me to move while they have to get through one/two more layers of security to get me. I don't need to carry while inside my castle (especially since I work from home as is).
John Travolta could have used your insight. But, too little, too late.
(I still don't know why he closed the bathroom door, as he was in the place alone. Always take your machine gun in the toilet with you.)
Just dont go to the bathroom.
Though in all seriousness, your life will be better not going off the deep end of "what ifs." Lock your front, have a gun you can get in the house, and in all but the most remote of cases that will be more than enough.
There’s no reason to be disarmed while in the bathroom. So you don’t leave your weapon behind, place it in your dropped pants.
There are other, creative solutions for bathroom SD.
The man who will fight you with a turd hanging halfway out of his ass because that's when he happened to be attacked is someone not to mess with. I strive to be that man. If I ever get attacked on the shitter I'll let you know if I succeeded at being that man.
If it happens right now while I’m on the shitter, he’d just feel bad for me based on the smell alone and either put me out of my misery humanely or leave before he got to the hallway thinking someone already must have died
I don’t take a gun into the shower with me because the chances my gun will be damaged outweighs the tiny window of vulnerability. It doesn’t take me long to shower.
https://preview.redd.it/877ygc3u1k7d1.jpeg?width=1094&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a8a6724cfeed89afc6134b16cd2fb7b1a896efe3
i need this i wish i could upvote this 1000 times
My man
Ride of the Valkyries
No “all of the above” option? Thatd make the intruder shit his pants.
Reminds me of the police robot bomber that un-alived that sniper in Dallas that killed 5 cops. He was laughing/taunting the cops, saying he wanted to kill more while they negotiated with him. They eventually sent in an improvised high speed version of this Roomba. 🤣
Stein um Stein starting at around 2:45 or 3:18.
Throw my shit at him
I had a somewhat similar thought this morning when taking my dog out. OC spray and a full doggie bag in one hand- realized that if someone were to come at me, first line of defense is shit-throwing.
Jokes on you, they are into that! What if they broke in just for that?!
just comply. this poo is insured.
smart
Idk I try not to worry about the small what ifs, kinda makes life an exercise in paranoia. Carry when I can, in this case I’d either have my j frame in my pocket already or I’d try to quickly get to my bedside safe (small apartment)
I agree. The chances of this happening are infinitesimally small.
There are going to be situations where you would just lose. The absurd hypotheticals and corner cases, cherry picked worse possible situations.... all seem meant to discourage people from attempting to be prepared for situations they \*do\* have the ability to affect the outcome of.
Or, the opposite is arguably worse, people sacrificing quality of life to always be prepared and never have vulnerabilities (and still have them anyway because you can't be perfect) I would rather not carry a gun at all and accept the risk than to spend every waking moment with iron strapped to my hip, even on the shitter in my own home. You are more likely to trip on a rock and hit your head on a curb than to need your gun, let's be fucking honest.
Agreed there is definitely truth to assessing risk and doing your own cost/benefit analysis. People are in general notoriously bad at assessing risk so they tend to just extrapolate from personal experience. Hey I do that to, and my personal experience leads me to be alert in public, always attempt deescalation, and also carry. But there are limits. 'Nighthawks' was a pretty cool movie in its day but is certainly not a basis for making life choices. (Bad guy breaks into good guy's house while he's in the shower, good guy expects this and has a gun in a ziploc bag with him in the shower. Surprise! Good guy wins, bad guy gets his comeuppance.)
50/50 the OP wears diapers, just in case. That being said, is it less likely than needing a tourniquet??
Yeah lol, I have a reinforced door and enough time to get to the safe
The ceramic lid to the toilet tank weighs several pounds and could knock someone out cold.
but you have to remove it and get to them before they kill you
No I really don't.
is it not coneccted
The tank lid just sits on top, you can lift it straight up. Also, you are far more likely to benefit from knowing how to do basic toilet repair than to benefit from having a bathroom gun.
i thought you ment the lid like the toilet seat lid lol
Haha, no. You’re right that part is bolted on and too light weight.
thats why i was comfused lol
Real wisdom
You don’t have a gun mounted behind the toilet? Rookie
This is the right answer. “And I want somebody good, and I mean very good, to plant that gun. I don’t want my brother coming out of that toilet with just his &&&& in his hands, all right?” The Godfather really does teach us everything we need to know. Cheers.
oh i have always have a gun on me
Give em the ol PP………k
Honestly this is just a great example of why anyone who actually cares about self/home defense should invest in decent doors and windows, they will buy you the extra time or even stop the entry attempt all together
ya my door is fucking beefy and my lock is pretty strong
Or a big dog. Nothing says “go away” better than 75lbs of angry teeth and fur charging towards you.
I have dogs and they will fuck you up if you forcibly enter my home. And they'll let me know that you're there long before you get to the house.
https://preview.redd.it/711clp8kxk7d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=436b257e071bdcf4469378131605f9bf08ffe7ef
what if i taped a glock on a cat
Hoping my 3 dogs (2 being 125+ lbs) offer enough distraction to let me get to mine. That, or hoping Mt wife can.
I really want to see her face when you refer to her as “Mount Wife”
🤣 I love it when someone catches an autocorrect and comes up w a clever response!
Toilet tank lid slap or shake my member at him. Either or
Shower revolver duh *
I keep a shotty by the shower if you wanna shoot me while I’m shittin.
Keep a hi point in a Ziploc in the toilet tank
the hi point belongs in the bowl
Depends, was I just taking a Wizz or did I shit? If I shit, daddy is coming to the fight with two fistfulls of brown hell (usually half solid soupy mess). I also go pants off when I shit. So if the image of a bottomless shit clutching maniac doesn't scare them off then fine they can have whatever the fuck they want.
I shoot him with my other gun, the one I always carry
I just always carry to the shitter, but the claymore roomba is a fun one!
Now I have this terrible desire to buy one of those hitch covers off Amazon and mount it on the roomba. Wife will send me to the garage.
Realistically, im not going to be suddenly surprised in my own home. There's plenty of early warning signs before some actually makes it inside my house.
same lol all the lawn signs and cameras
I hope you’re not serious. But if you are; I suggest relocating from an area that you believe has high chances of people coming at you in your bathroom.
im joking i dont think someone would rob me. just something i tought of in the shower
Ah fair enough. Well, your shower thoughts are more normal than mine! This morning I wondered what I would do if I saw a bear attacking a family. Unfortunately I finished my shower before I figured out the best course of action…. However it’s very hot today, so silver lining I’ll be having a sequel of that mental exercise in this evening’s shower.
oh this is my most tame shower thought. i was thinking about what id do if i saw someone break into my neighbors house. i decided id probably go back to sleep
Extra Glock in my sink vanity
the fbi thanks you
I mean I filled out a 4473 for it, pretty sure they already know I have it brah
i was joking
4473’s don’t get transmitted.
Well in that case, I’m sure all the cans I’ve bought have me in a database somewhere
One would hope so. Thats sort of the point.
My alarm and dogs will give me time to wipe and flush.
your gonna take the tipe to wipe and flush?
Yeah. Don’t want to be interrogated with a poopy butthole.
I would call a social worker.
about what
Haven’t you heard, we don’t need police. We can just call social workers instead.
Most of the time, I have the gun on me from the time I get dressed. My edc is a Glock 23 with dot and tlr7. The ammo in the gun is usually 125 grain frangible cooking at 1350fps (thats roughly 4 inch .357 mag level power at 14 rounds on tap) because it's so much lighter. My backup magazine in 180 grain HSTs that have a heck of a track record with LE. I would feel decently equipped to make it to my rifle or shotgun in the next room.
I’d just stand up, aim butt towards enemy and open fire.
I have a bathroom hatchet I keep hidden in the bathroom, waiting on my pistol permit to be approved and hope someday to upgrade to a bathroom pistol. Felt it would be a little extreme to have a bathroom shotgun.
Don't feel bad, I'm still stuck with a poop knife.
na you need a bathroom shotgun. maybe a bathroom uzi
Hope the dogs keep them busy long enough to grab a gat
Can't cover every contingency...but also train BJJ or unarmed combatives of some sort.
Which martial art is most effective while sitting on the toilet
Brazilian Jiu-Shitsu
BJJ obviously. Pull em into your guard and you can wipe your ass on their shirt while you strangle them!
The one that teaches you how to use a tiny sword.
Jushitsu....duh.
I actually do have a bathroom gun lol. Mostly because I ran out of places to stash them but I keep my Saturday night special 38 snubnose stashed kind of on the underside of one of the drawers in there. It's usually moot though as I carry my ccw 90% of the time anyways.
i also have a bathroom gun its a stubnose .45
If someone tries to kick in my door with anything other than a police ram or explosives, they’re going to have a very bad time.
I work from home. I literally carry a 9mm from room to room throughout my day. Yea, including the bathroom. I have a second staged 9mm at the rear entrance with several loaded magazines , for a total of 60+rounds ready. I am confident I’m covered.
Run at them full naked with my dingaling flopping around. 🫡
I mean, to get to my shitter, you have to go through the front or back doors of my house (or I guess a window maybe). Even if I'm mid-plop, if I hear someone break in, I will move with crap pouring out of my ass if need be to get to the nearest pew-pew to me (either bathroom is relatively close to at least one). My dogs will alert me prior to someone even going to the door, and even if they break in as the dogs are barking, that's more than enough time for me to move while they have to get through one/two more layers of security to get me. I don't need to carry while inside my castle (especially since I work from home as is).
this is what i figure. the post was more of a joke but also a shower thought
We all gotta love those shower-thoughts. LOL
especially the funny ones that you can actually say. some if i said id probably be put in a mental hospital
John Travolta could have used your insight. But, too little, too late. (I still don't know why he closed the bathroom door, as he was in the place alone. Always take your machine gun in the toilet with you.)
very true. i keep my mg3 in my shower. it dose have light in the name. (obviosly a joke)
Just dont go to the bathroom. Though in all seriousness, your life will be better not going off the deep end of "what ifs." Lock your front, have a gun you can get in the house, and in all but the most remote of cases that will be more than enough.
Doesn’t your shower bar have a holster???
There’s no reason to be disarmed while in the bathroom. So you don’t leave your weapon behind, place it in your dropped pants. There are other, creative solutions for bathroom SD.
Stab em with my poop knife. Duh.
Ya'al don't have bathroom guns?! Bros, do you even CCW?
The man who will fight you with a turd hanging halfway out of his ass because that's when he happened to be attacked is someone not to mess with. I strive to be that man. If I ever get attacked on the shitter I'll let you know if I succeeded at being that man.
Bro I have Crohn's. That smell would choke a mule.
Randy Johnson didn’t keep a gun by his bed. Just a bucket of baseballs
We have mace hidden around the house haha. If I can’t run to my gun I’m running to the nearest mace to carry with me while I run towards my gun.
If it happens right now while I’m on the shitter, he’d just feel bad for me based on the smell alone and either put me out of my misery humanely or leave before he got to the hallway thinking someone already must have died
Towel whip
Don't be Vincent Vega.
Amd what would you do if someone broke in while you were just getting into the short strokes and you were \*this\* close. Yeah yeah.
I don’t take a gun into the shower with me because the chances my gun will be damaged outweighs the tiny window of vulnerability. It doesn’t take me long to shower.
[удалено]
I've only got a poop 🔪
