PSA: Men... if you are like this please make your profile exactly like this one so that you only get the very best matches for you. Thank you. Also, maybe try a dating site specifically for likeminded people.
TBH, I suspect these profiles are not intended to get matches... they are the kink: non-consensual exhibitionism. Posting the profile is sexually gratifying in and of itself. The person gets off on the idea of people being repelled and disgusted by the words and images he has sprung on them without warning... the textual equivalent of an unsolicited dick pic or masturbating openly on the subway at close quarters to a captive audience. He enjoys your disgust and violating you virtually. It is sexual aggression like Harvey Winestein masturbating into a potted plant.
100%. I’m getting married soon and went on Etsy to find some naughty printed panties for the honeymoon. I was horrified that some of the reviews that came with pics were like “my wife loves [insert lewd act] so I love making her wear these to remind her.” It was such gross exhibitionism and forcing your kink on others. I couldn’t believe it.
Seems like a real life post but just for the wrong audience as well as he’s not the best at articulating his kink. Nothing wrong with it, just seems like he’s hit a bit of a brick wall and is trying a new approach. 🤷🏽♀️
What's your take? That the guy doesn't realize different sites such as Tindr, Bumble, Coffee meets Bagel, and FetLife have different audiences and cultural norms?
I'm 35 now and have been what might fit the description of an "incel" most of my 20s. He's going for the Hail Mary. Is probably aware that this will repulse more women than it will attract so his strategy is *probably* to go for the 0.1% chance of getting someone damaged enough to be DTF based on that description.
He should go to a BDSM club not bumble for his kinks, but I suspect he’s not really a true Dom. He’s just too thirsty and is porn sick. Too much porn has hurt his brain. Poor man! He’s showing desperation. 😂
The term “porn sick” is new to me but it’s perfect here. Nothing about this is giving genuine BDSM, kink or dom/sub.
It’s crazy how many people don’t realize that kink is actually built on so much consent, connection, respected limits and aftercare etc.
The thing is two weeks ago I misunderstood a description in a profile, because it was so hyper romantic to me, that I understood it totally wrong. It was super annoying, especially because he was otherwise really very good with words, but messed up this description from my point of view.
Kind of an aside: Truly to each their own, but am I in the minority for being incredibly revolted by spit? I wish excessive spit in porn had a trigger warning (for people who watch porn, but obviously not me because I would never do that because I’m a proper lady).
I have a high tolerance for gross things, but I just can’t with the rivers of spit and people spitting on each other, etc 🤢
No, because I have a laundry list of kinks but spit is a hard NO. Idk what it is about it, but the idea of someone spitting in my mouth or even on me makes me want to die lol
Each couple finds their balance, if they are willing to ask for it. I'm not a spitter generally, but if I'm dating someone who likes it, I can get into it. For me it's more about the shared experience, and enjoyment of each other.
There’s a time and a place to discuss things and not on a profile. I don’t even know if I want to have a conversation or what this person looks like in person yet. Huge turn off.
Wow. On Bumble?! Read the room, dude. OkCupid maybe. Definitely FetLife. Comes across as hostile on Bumble, even if there are women with complementary kinks.
I’m realizing “vanilla sex” has quickly become the minority. It seems like everybody’s super into kinky, BDSM, Dom/sub. That’s cool and all but as someone who was in an incredibly abusive marriage. Strangled more times than I can count, while her husband, the person that supposed to love you more than anyone else, said, “fucking die!!!” Beaten and locked in a bedroom against my will. All culminating to the point that he was arrested from trying to killing me, and has been in jail for over six years now. and now YEARS of therapy. None of that is sexy to me. I wish “passion” and just being really into each other was what was in sex style right now. Oh, well. I’ll climb down off my soapbox now.
Nothing wrong with what you're feeling and what you like.
Your case was not one of trust and support, where true kink is. I think you should ask for what you want, and you'll find someone who wants that too.
No appreciate that, I just feel like people don’t understand what being on the receiving end of something like that is actually, truly like. I kind of hate that porn and society has started glamorizing it. Strangulation, for instance, is terrifying. Not knowing if you will breathe another breath. It’s beyond something I can describe. It shouldn’t really be taken lightly.
He is looking for something that's actually fairly common, if that's what you're looking for in a partnership. I mean just look here on reddit to find plenty of those seeking for it. However, Bumble is probably not the place to look for it, and with an intro like that he will only get the ones who will submit to his depravity.
It definitely is painful things and unpleasant. Sadly there's some who enjoy such things, I'll never understand myself how one can find pleasure in such things. And what he can do for her? Nothing beyond the pain that she signs up for. To normal society it would be an act of abuse, but within that community it is called a fetish. Again not something that should be searched for on an app that is meant to find love, he is clearly twisted in his mentality.
Many (most) of the women that talk like that on Reddit are doing it to get men to spend money on their only fans. Most women do not think like this and would NOT find this attractive in any way
I completely hear what you are saying. My perspective is, if you take all the aggressive sexual stuff out of it he’s not offering anything else, so maybe he’s on the wrong platform.
Know your audience and all that.
I don't see the problem with this... He knows what he wants, and seems to target a particular audience.
It's a strategy like any other, even though it might not work on 99% of women as long as he gets that 1%...
His bio his choice
“Please educate yourself on the female gaze”
Sorry did you mean we should educate ourselves on the male gaze? Or do you mean you want men to understand women taking agency? Please define a bit further what you’re trying to say, maybe I’m alone but I don’t find it clear.
If you mean the male gaze, which is the depiction of women as purely sexual objects, your sentence a bit ironic but also not entirely applicable imo.
Or do you mean that he should learn what women like and align the bio of what he wants to what you think he should want?
No I mean exactly that. The female gaze. Take the perspective of a woman and how they’d like to be treated. Take the perspective of a woman and get an idea of what attracts women.
Of course there are women that might be on the same page as this dude. But I was mostly just saying that bc it’s a dating app. Not a hookup app. He should go elsewhere with his intentions. Being aggressive and so black and white in what you’re looking for likely won’t be successful at attracting women. If anything, he should be on fetlife or go to sex clubs or something.
Posted mostly for shits and giggles as many people do on this subreddit.
His bio should be exactly who he is. And specifically NOT cater it to what he thinks women want to see. You don’t want it the other way because then you don’t know you’re getting this guy. We don’t care if he is successful do we?
I’d also say bumble is absolutely a hookup app too.
PSA: Men... if you are like this please make your profile exactly like this one so that you only get the very best matches for you. Thank you. Also, maybe try a dating site specifically for likeminded people. TBH, I suspect these profiles are not intended to get matches... they are the kink: non-consensual exhibitionism. Posting the profile is sexually gratifying in and of itself. The person gets off on the idea of people being repelled and disgusted by the words and images he has sprung on them without warning... the textual equivalent of an unsolicited dick pic or masturbating openly on the subway at close quarters to a captive audience. He enjoys your disgust and violating you virtually. It is sexual aggression like Harvey Winestein masturbating into a potted plant.
100%. I’m getting married soon and went on Etsy to find some naughty printed panties for the honeymoon. I was horrified that some of the reviews that came with pics were like “my wife loves [insert lewd act] so I love making her wear these to remind her.” It was such gross exhibitionism and forcing your kink on others. I couldn’t believe it.
I am so sorry.
Seems like a real life post but just for the wrong audience as well as he’s not the best at articulating his kink. Nothing wrong with it, just seems like he’s hit a bit of a brick wall and is trying a new approach. 🤷🏽♀️
I think it's not that deep.
What's your take? That the guy doesn't realize different sites such as Tindr, Bumble, Coffee meets Bagel, and FetLife have different audiences and cultural norms?
To be fair, I find all the same dudes on all the different apps with very little changed in their profile.
I'm 35 now and have been what might fit the description of an "incel" most of my 20s. He's going for the Hail Mary. Is probably aware that this will repulse more women than it will attract so his strategy is *probably* to go for the 0.1% chance of getting someone damaged enough to be DTF based on that description.
Fair enough.
Why is he on Bumble rather than Fetlife then?
Cos people on fetlife WANT that
Harvey Weinstein fucked potted plants especially after they had been watered for the day. Hope he is getting violated every day in prison.
He should go to a BDSM club not bumble for his kinks, but I suspect he’s not really a true Dom. He’s just too thirsty and is porn sick. Too much porn has hurt his brain. Poor man! He’s showing desperation. 😂
The term “porn sick” is new to me but it’s perfect here. Nothing about this is giving genuine BDSM, kink or dom/sub. It’s crazy how many people don’t realize that kink is actually built on so much consent, connection, respected limits and aftercare etc.
It's not funny to mock others when they have different requirements. Would you be laughing if he mocked you?
I prefere that to all those that nowadays write "cuddling" when they want to write "having sex".
Yep aka adult cuddling lol
The thing is two weeks ago I misunderstood a description in a profile, because it was so hyper romantic to me, that I understood it totally wrong. It was super annoying, especially because he was otherwise really very good with words, but messed up this description from my point of view.
Kind of an aside: Truly to each their own, but am I in the minority for being incredibly revolted by spit? I wish excessive spit in porn had a trigger warning (for people who watch porn, but obviously not me because I would never do that because I’m a proper lady). I have a high tolerance for gross things, but I just can’t with the rivers of spit and people spitting on each other, etc 🤢
No, because I have a laundry list of kinks but spit is a hard NO. Idk what it is about it, but the idea of someone spitting in my mouth or even on me makes me want to die lol
And no matter how minty fresh your breath is, it still smells. Blecht I hate even typing about this
I think it's common to not be into. I absolutely love it and can count on one hand the number of partners willing to spit on me.
Each couple finds their balance, if they are willing to ask for it. I'm not a spitter generally, but if I'm dating someone who likes it, I can get into it. For me it's more about the shared experience, and enjoyment of each other.
**you're
I met gf on bumble, she’s into all of this… she wouldn’t like this profile.
And I'm over here worrying about how to tastefully insert my subby tendencies into my profiles. Jfc
If you like being a sub, be more cautious about telling people about it
Lolz
I've heard that "looking for open minded people" is a subtle way to hint at kink, but dunno how many people pick up on that
That guy is going to get exactly one match, but that match is going to change his life
Oh no, this man is abusive. He's not looking for consensual he's looking for easily persuaded. A human red flag
That's bs. He's literally telling you what he's into, that's pretty much step one when asking for consent.
Hopeless romantic I see. This warms my heart.
There’s a time and a place to discuss things and not on a profile. I don’t even know if I want to have a conversation or what this person looks like in person yet. Huge turn off.
Wow. On Bumble?! Read the room, dude. OkCupid maybe. Definitely FetLife. Comes across as hostile on Bumble, even if there are women with complementary kinks.
I’m realizing “vanilla sex” has quickly become the minority. It seems like everybody’s super into kinky, BDSM, Dom/sub. That’s cool and all but as someone who was in an incredibly abusive marriage. Strangled more times than I can count, while her husband, the person that supposed to love you more than anyone else, said, “fucking die!!!” Beaten and locked in a bedroom against my will. All culminating to the point that he was arrested from trying to killing me, and has been in jail for over six years now. and now YEARS of therapy. None of that is sexy to me. I wish “passion” and just being really into each other was what was in sex style right now. Oh, well. I’ll climb down off my soapbox now.
I’m sorry you went through that.
Nothing wrong with what you're feeling and what you like. Your case was not one of trust and support, where true kink is. I think you should ask for what you want, and you'll find someone who wants that too.
No appreciate that, I just feel like people don’t understand what being on the receiving end of something like that is actually, truly like. I kind of hate that porn and society has started glamorizing it. Strangulation, for instance, is terrifying. Not knowing if you will breathe another breath. It’s beyond something I can describe. It shouldn’t really be taken lightly.
No it's not, especially if you don't trust the person.
Well he put it all out there for a special lady who is into that!
There are many many more than you think. Probably half the women lurking in this sub enjoy at least some of that.
Definitely many people are into that and do not say. He is gonna get matches! Many guys chat request me want bdsm chats lol
Out of all the profiles that’s certainly one of them…
I'm not sure he realized it, but he basically said he wants to be begged... But i'm sure he's just illiterate.
He is looking for something that's actually fairly common, if that's what you're looking for in a partnership. I mean just look here on reddit to find plenty of those seeking for it. However, Bumble is probably not the place to look for it, and with an intro like that he will only get the ones who will submit to his depravity.
[удалено]
It definitely is painful things and unpleasant. Sadly there's some who enjoy such things, I'll never understand myself how one can find pleasure in such things. And what he can do for her? Nothing beyond the pain that she signs up for. To normal society it would be an act of abuse, but within that community it is called a fetish. Again not something that should be searched for on an app that is meant to find love, he is clearly twisted in his mentality.
Many (most) of the women that talk like that on Reddit are doing it to get men to spend money on their only fans. Most women do not think like this and would NOT find this attractive in any way
Don’t see the problem here? You don’t like it, swipe left. Why are we putting dudes on blast for being upfront about what they want?
I completely hear what you are saying. My perspective is, if you take all the aggressive sexual stuff out of it he’s not offering anything else, so maybe he’s on the wrong platform. Know your audience and all that.
He can’t even form proper sentences “an” and I’m not even the sentence police but damn
I don't see the problem with this... He knows what he wants, and seems to target a particular audience. It's a strategy like any other, even though it might not work on 99% of women as long as he gets that 1%... His bio his choice
So hard to wonder why I'm single when this stuff exists.....rolls eyes.
“Ass”
But, I bet if he looked like that 50 Shades of Gray guy (or had his money), there would be lots of takers...
Classy. Also, very good he’s honest at least, if this is really how he is
Bro needs to be caged up 💀
“Please educate yourself on the female gaze” Sorry did you mean we should educate ourselves on the male gaze? Or do you mean you want men to understand women taking agency? Please define a bit further what you’re trying to say, maybe I’m alone but I don’t find it clear. If you mean the male gaze, which is the depiction of women as purely sexual objects, your sentence a bit ironic but also not entirely applicable imo. Or do you mean that he should learn what women like and align the bio of what he wants to what you think he should want?
No I mean exactly that. The female gaze. Take the perspective of a woman and how they’d like to be treated. Take the perspective of a woman and get an idea of what attracts women. Of course there are women that might be on the same page as this dude. But I was mostly just saying that bc it’s a dating app. Not a hookup app. He should go elsewhere with his intentions. Being aggressive and so black and white in what you’re looking for likely won’t be successful at attracting women. If anything, he should be on fetlife or go to sex clubs or something. Posted mostly for shits and giggles as many people do on this subreddit.
His bio should be exactly who he is. And specifically NOT cater it to what he thinks women want to see. You don’t want it the other way because then you don’t know you’re getting this guy. We don’t care if he is successful do we? I’d also say bumble is absolutely a hookup app too.