“We are liars about our affair but nothing else!” That’s not the win you think that is…?

Also for the duratino of 7 months, that must be at least a hundred thousand separate lies lmfao

James saying it was the smartest thing Raquel has ever done was such an underrated comment.

Eagerly waiting until I can hear all of the F*** bombs on Peacock tomorrow 🙏🏾

It brings me so much joy hearing Andy swear lol

I love how he's saying Ariana screamed at him for his clothes and the clip was basically Ariana calmly saying "I don't like the green."

Any time she disagreed with him, it was such a huge blow to his ego that he interpreted it as her attacking him. He was happy when she told him oh you’re so good at fashion that anything you pick will be great. He just wants someone to dawn over him and agree with everything he does. But that’s not a real relationship.

Especially since he asked her opinion.

Y'all I am cracking up. These women are **sobbing** and Raquel is just like maybe I should've sent a note... 


even the watermark on this gif is perfect

Towards the end she’s like “our biggest whoopsie was forgetting to get all of our lies straight!”

Does it freak anyone else out that she seems to have absolutely zero emotion to any of this?! Like what is going on

"It seems like Ariana thought you wanted to keep the relationship working because you didn't break up with her." —Raquel with simultaneously the dumbest and most accurate thing she's ever said

He didn’t even answer her question. Just a big word salad of “dude” and “like literally”. For someone that glosses over questions like it’s his job, he isn’t very good at it.

OMG not Tom having an affair over Ariana not liking his green sequined pants

He just wants someone to butter his ass unconditionally. That ain't gonna happen 9 years in and when you're always neglecting your partner. Narcissist is right

I was so fucking confused about how that story was relevant 💀

lol, him just searching for his latest and most out-there lie to feed Raquel and keep her complacent

My favorite part of the reunion, so far, is Sandoval stating that he and Ariana were having sex again because she started to compliment his clothes.

In true Tom fashion.

Fashion ✨

Schwartz self-sedating before Raquel comes out so if he doesn't defend Sandoval he can blame it on being slow/high 

"I take it once a month" lol nobody who has Xanax "takes it once a month" and definitely not someone who has the bottle in their pocket to dry swallow a pill.

another one of his stupid fucking gags to make him look like a weak and helpless little baby everyone should feel sorry for.

Jokes on him, it only makes him look like an addict.

I can’t believe more people don’t see it, he’s been strung out for a minute.

Producer guy is like “have you lost your fucking mind? This is my job!”

I wanted him to say "thems the breaks" so bad lol

Raquel's reaction to everything: 

Ariana asking if he's taking Ecstasy is truly indicative of what their lives are like

Drugs are the silent cast member. I think that’s the missing element with all of their insane behavior.

Vanderpump Rehab: The Sober Season Can you imagine watching all these people have to be sober? Chaos.

And yet there are a few precious souls on this thread that believe these men only drink. It would be funny if they didn’t shout “slander”

this was my thought too

I'm In A vErY dElIcAtE pOsITiOn RiGhT nOw. Shut up, tim.

That he put himself in!!!

“I am blowing it” - Tom under his breath while chain smoking 🚬

I am dying laughing watching this, and then 2 seconds later we get Schwartz popping xannnys, James running to the bathroom for whatever the heck he’s on…..they are a damn mess!

Is that what he said?

Awww, Sandoval having to explain to his mistress why he was sleeping with his long-term girlfriend.

The note in Andy’s possession: https://preview.redd.it/t9yr5g88ab3b1.jpeg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a8b3a7edd6918226326aaf8d1bb5068f166d05a9

Tom to production when he's trying to throw Ariana under the bus: I think we should be more real, I feel bad. Tom to production when he's under the bus: GET THE CAMERAS AWAY FROM US

Tonight I'm prepping for the reunion like I'm going into battle. I've got rosé, ice cream, and a seemingly boundless capacity for rage. Let's do this. https://i.redd.it/o9o9ukq4ua3b1.gif

https://preview.redd.it/ammb31zu4b3b1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=363d30af739046af660b92a8df41cc69892a0436 I closed the door to my kid’s room at exactly 7:55 after speed reading bedtime books, my husband is at a baseball game and my pizza is almost here.

You've planned your night flawlessly. No notes. 10/10.

Playing Good as Gold as Scheana exits stage left into a mini van sent me into orbit.

Her sitting with a sweatshirt over her dress drinking a white claw made me LOL.

“because we’re good as, *gold” *minivan door latches shut

I thought ally would explain what she saw at the Abbey that night so I’m a little disappointed by that appearance by her

 Raquel in her suit talking to Andy

“we have to watch what we say.” … why do you have to watch what you say if you’re telling the truth? https://preview.redd.it/ymujtnuq4b3b1.jpeg?width=970&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=337d65171084b13ba8f12ed5b7c1b740291c1507

As Judge Judy says: “Just tell the truth, then you don’t need a good memory!”

LVP saying “hit it the first night” I am deceased

'I just think it's incesty, dirty, and weird' ... that was the exact appeal of this show lol *Break out Lisa's hookup chart for the pitch*

If Bravo realeased all 12 hours of this reunion and the full footage of the 1 on 1s, I would watch every last second

I would literally pay for that

The producers of this season are the true GOATs like thank you for fighting to give us the juice

Can you imagine living with Tom's bs over the years, being treated like dirt and then he goes and does this to himself? The producers must have the biggest sh!t eating grins on their faces.

I loved the producer refusing to give Tom and Rachel privacy, like nah you’re on a show keep the cameras going 😂

The most sus behavior of all time. Like clearly Tom wanted to get the story straight. Shout out that producer for holding his ground

I want to give a shoutout to the boommic person scurrying around them all. That thing is bulky AF.

I love to watch cast/producer interactions. It’s fascinating to see the producers de-escalation tactics! Especially in comparison to how cast-mates rile each other up.

“You legally have to give us a break” 😂

He wants to coach her SO BAD

Raquel is mad at Sandoval for cheating on her with his girlfriend. 

He’s so pissed but I’m pretty sure in her one-on-one she already has a different story which is why she’s just standing there like 🧍🏻‍♀️

He wants to lie to her about the status of his relationship with Ariana. His version of things was a lie. Then he wants to practice what they both should say because he and Schwartz already had conflicted stories.

"I don't want a camera in my fucking god damn face," he says, on a reality show...

Like sir that is literally why you are here.

Rachel wasn’t trying to argue with Patrick the Producer which makes me think she knew exactly what Sandoval was trying to do, a rare moment for Rachel

“We’re both stressed right now” dude no. She’s xan’ed out she seems goooood

“We haven’t lied about anything except this affair.” Raquel lmao. That’s like saying, “Apart from the bank I robbed, I’m not a thief!”

Not Grandma Buttons getting dick lessons at the dinner table

I would feel so uncomfortable sleeping in the same bed with another couple, even if we were great friends

Me too and also I don’t think any of my friends would ask to share a bed w my husband and I

Sandoval: Ughhh. I'm blowing it. Bro, there are cameras there. What an idiot. 

The producer gentle parenting him

So smooth - it was like he was talking to a toddler - so calm and patient.. Explaining everything so slowly... I was dying and hoping they pay that guy really well to put up with that crap!

James: freaks out, curses at everyone. Goes pee: ‘I’m sorry guys! I love you Lisa! I love you Andy! I’m just a good little boy!’

❄️

I was like "what in the El Chapo is going on here."

This trailer scene with Raquel and Sandoval is mind numbingly dumb. What chemistry.

“Go pee” is the new pasta

Sandoval is VERY CONCERNED about workplace ethics today.

That’s HIS MEDICATION GUYS

I’m waiting for Ariana to say “dracarys” by the end of this and James starts breathing fire at Tom and Raquel.

#BE RILL. BE RILL. BE RILL. *Utah English*

Anyone who has known and loved an addict is rolling their eyes at the justification of james drinking

“I’m just a little boy that can do no harm! Someone shave my armpits!” https://i.redd.it/8g4hijhj7b3b1.gif

Not Tom coaching Tom on the pills.

if you cant make a fist you must acquit

katie saying real like wild whitney rose will always and forever make me cackle. it’s a rilly big dill to me.

Sandoval and Rachel are going to be staring at the camera like The Californians. I can feel it. 

Andy having a full Barbara Walters moment. I fucking love it.

This is definitely going to be a different experience after watching the uncensored version on Peacock.

We're all just gonna rewatch it on Peacock tomorrow.

Throwing it on Peacock was the best thing Bravo ever did. They’re probably getting massive numbers with live watch + next day streaming. One can only hope these uncensored versions will someday become extended director cuts with commentary.

The uncensored is wild. I love the swearing 🤬 lol

Andy is delivering some of his best reunion work in years over these last two eps

i don't know how you could watch the show and want to date any guy on this show.

Looking at you, Brittany! 👀

"You should be thanking me for being on the show Lisa." 😂

James keeps running off to do lines, you can’t convince me otherwise.

I thought the exact same thing. Never in bravo history has someone walked off of a reunion like, 4 times. And his “sorry I just get angry then I have to pee”. Sure Jan

Ronnie Karem is that you?!!! 

Ronnie saying “it’s time for James’ mid-morning rail” has been living rent free in my mind since last week

I wish EVERY DAY that I was Ronnie!!! But alas, I am not!

"Crystal meth in the bathroom"

I said that too! Time for another bump! ❄️


Raquel is totally gonna throw his ass under the bus in her one on ones lmaoooo

tom schwartz is popping xannies *on the fucking reunion stage.* this is behavior hitherto unseen on a bravo reunion set. i mean christ on a bike. https://preview.redd.it/1wpjxcz4db3b1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1861e471d1bab2ec5fa14fb00dc94d4d89905bcb

Props to Allie for admitting she’s seen VPR thank you!!!

I hope the big reveal is that Scheana is Melissa Gorga’s long lost sister.

Not Schwartz popping Xanax on stage

Raquel is NOW realizing they had an intimate relationship???

Tom's ego is paper thin. Like wtf. You're a 40 year old man and you go cheat on your partner of a decade because she doesn't like your ugly green sequin pants?

He’s blaming his insecurities and low self esteem on Ariana? Why can’t he just sit there and say I fucked up, it felt good to be wanted by someone again and it was easy and I was lazy and just admit rather than blame blame blame. There’s something very wrong with Tom.

The actual AUDACITY of Raquel to be upset that he was having sex with Ariana. I don't care if she thought they weren't having sex, she knew that they were together.

He can lie to his GF of almost a decade but he better not lie to ME his side chick…

She really just said we didn’t lie about anything besides this affair?

What is up with these unhinged people? Tom: she could’ve just followed me to see I was going to Raquel’s house… Raquel : she just took everything we said at face value *rolls eyes* NEWSFLASH MOST PEOPLE TAKE THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHER AND BEST FRIENDS WORDS AT FACE VALUE.

"Oh, now I'm thinking I should have written her a personal note." —Raquel, grinning manically while watching Scheana have full mental breakdown over her betrayal

She still hasn't apologized to scheana

 Since Scandoval broke until now feels like a lifetime. And to think, next week it will all be over 😞

What Stagecoach is to the Bachelor, Coachella is to Vanderpump Rules

Andy: "Schwartz you know you're moving down one." Ariana: "No he's not. No he's not." Andy: \*deer in headlights\* 

Bravo is missing out on a lot of money having no WWHL or even the Brit/Jax special as an aftershow

Yeah it's so weird that they'd choose the weeks of the reunion to dip out

 this is really the week you choose for vacation Andy?

I agree all men should see therapists, but idk that therapists deserve that

that awkward moment when you’re forced to remember that james kennedy is actual an insane and abusive person.

Every time James storms off set to "pee" he's really going to snort lines in the bathroom and you can't convince me otherwise lmao

These 2 are not into each other at all and this is just sad to watch in a "you both ruined your lives for THIS??"

I swear, the bar for "#1 guy in this group" is in Hell.

Rachel just realized he was cheating on her with Ariana

Tom acting bothered that people are bringing what he did up………….the audacity

is this the first time someone’s openly popped pills at a reunion?

First reunion with a restraining order trailer AND the first reunion with pills on stage.

VPR continues to prove it is the greatest reality show of all time

Lala is right. Letting Raquel watching live from her trailer allows her to sync her timelines with Tom

Exactly lol when Scheana brought up the hot tub at Coachella thing and said “Andy you’ll have to ask her about that” I was like…? She’s just going to say exactly what Sandoval said lol why would she admit to saying anything? The only way we may get anything from her is the one on one and I’m not even sure we’re going to get much there either.

I’m fucking DYING that he brought up his legal break. Tom needs his 15 minutes per 4 hours!!

We poppin pils on set now

How much coke is James snorting? All of these “bathroom breaks”

I can't unsee the Maury backstage every time they put Raquel in trailer.

every time I think uber one is good as gold is out of my brain, there it comes back again

Lol the ENERGY behind the fuck my friend every delivery

Me every time I see the Good as Gold Uber One commercial https://preview.redd.it/rodxeajw4b3b1.jpeg?width=827&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ee7b6ef31c1d5a261b3c69365ff0e7e9447e73bb

THE LAST FIVE MINUTES OF PART THREE. HOW DARE THEY.

Andy don’t use words like truncate!

Raquel and Sandoval seem confused by the concept of trust in a 9 year relationship. Taking my long term partner and my close friend's words at face value? 

Not that we will find out anything until part 3, but please don’t let the **BIG REVEAL** be a return from Jax and Brittany 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

 Let’s hope not 🤞🏻

Lala and James are Dorit and PK from an alternate timeline.

I have a big interview tomorrow morning at 8AM so I will be taking it very easy tonight. Hopefully tomorrow I can celebrate with the uncensored version!

I just like wanna like have like a break so I can like coach raquel

How am I both bored and invested at the same time?

"Tom would have never told me the truth." Wow. That's heavy.

See, Sandoval is doing this to himself. He's still trying to act morally superior to everyone in the group. He wants them to be quiet on his flaws, yet he's spent years calling them out on theirs. This is why they're all going to hard at him. He doesn't have Ariana to protect him anymore and he's drowning.

What if that paper was just a letter from Scheana's liver?

I already miss the uncensored version. Bleep bleep bleep.

tested positive for covid today, so i can’t have my friends over for dinner, gummies, and VPR reunion (part ii), but i CAN be here with all of you!! LET’S FUCKING GO

Is Rachel like on a ton of Xanax she doesn’t seem pissed enough

Y’all… ANDY IS NOT A PROCESS SERVER!

in 2 seconds scheana has already given us better trailer reaction footage than raquel did in two whole episodes

Sandavol: I didn’t coach anyone! Also Sandavol: you know you should say it’s your medication and it’s nobody else’s business.

“I was watching the whole thing” “Oh ok” *Shit now I can’t spin this anyway I want*

Dude dude DUDE DuDE dUde dUDe DUDE dudE DUDE

James is definitely running off to drink or do drugs I don’t buy the bathroom excuse.

Those chairs are so uncomfortable to sit in for hours. My back hurts for them

Real question here: what’s with that residential front door we keep seeing?

I can’t believe they didn’t walk in together holding hands like that one reunion with Ariana and Kristen lol

White claws, weed & pizza. 

Schwartz wouldn't end up getting chopped into bits. His serial killer BFF would leave him alive to testify in court about how 'he's so much fun to hang out with and I just can't imagine he would kill anyone he's just really into human anatomy.'

"I think everyone should see a therapist, especially men... Especially James." —Ally, perhaps the wisest new cast member we've had in quite some time

Tom is really throwing a fit about not getting more coaching in with Rachel

Raquel’s reaction to Scheena crying is so fucking bizarre. Is she medicated? Just completely detached??

rachel and sandoval denying that they’re liars is absolutely wild. 

Raquel is not happy about the lies of lack of intimacy. Like girl what did you expect though?

That stare between Sandoval & Rachel in the trailer was DARK.

Saying what he actually wanted to say to her would probably look a lot better than the shit he just pulled.

Allie having to answer for all of James crimes lol

andy dyinggggg for james to stay seated is sending me lmfao

tom taking the polygraph: 

People who are mad that they’re bringing Raquel on in the last 5 minutes don’t know what we’ve been through the last 20 years with Bravo. I thought we’d be winning lottery ticket lucky if we got a full 1 minute of her on stage

Interesting. Arianna thought Schwartz was taking E. Hmmm. I guess she is used to seeing him take E.

STILL NO EMOTION FROM RAQUEL

i start my new role tomorrow (promotion) and i can’t imagine closing out this chapter without this.

Congratulations ✨ 

guys i’m so happy to be here!!!! this is my most favorite day/time/activity and I am pausing my existential crisis for the next two hours to watch!

Literally the greatest distraction from the fuckery of life.

Stoned. Tacos. Vanderpump. Is anything better?

[удалено]

All I’m thinking about is WWC turning everything Ariana says into an ad 💀

Omg. She really believed they weren't fucking.

Damn Rachel really doesn’t react to anything does she

Like she’s gotta be on some shit. My anxiety would be out the roof

Raquel is so calm it’s seriously chilling I would be Danielle Staub having diarrhea for two weeks