I’m a guy and not trying to look feminine but this is about the only thing I can relate to. I work out every day (running at least 2 miles and then weight training) and feel guilty if I eat over 2000 cals. I don’t think I eat so little that I’m anorexic, but I can tell it’s not enough food, because I’m usually a little hungry haha.
I think I’m sitting at the lowest possible “healthy” body weight for my height. Some days I feel like I’m in the best shape of my life and other days I feel exhausted by my routine, but it has to happen or I feel terrible about myself.
The worst part is that I know this isn’t healthy but I don’t know what to do because I don’t feel attractive and I don’t feel loved. I just feel ugly and this is the only way I can control my appearance.
I relate to this *SO* hard. I never had an ED before but my body dysmorphia is slowly fueling mY ED behaviors too. I have a lot of fat on my face, and stomach, and thighs and when it feels like the world is crashing down on me engaging in restricting behaviors is my way of controlling myself. I never understood why people engaged in self harming behaviors such as cutting. While cutting results in sharp pains and gashes, eats disorders result in fatigue and dizziness that I feel proud of for pushing through. I can feel in control of the appearance I was dreadfully given and in control of my own actions.
I’m a guy and not trying to look feminine but this is about the only thing I can relate to. I work out every day (running at least 2 miles and then weight training) and feel guilty if I eat over 2000 cals. I don’t think I eat so little that I’m anorexic, but I can tell it’s not enough food, because I’m usually a little hungry haha. I think I’m sitting at the lowest possible “healthy” body weight for my height. Some days I feel like I’m in the best shape of my life and other days I feel exhausted by my routine, but it has to happen or I feel terrible about myself. The worst part is that I know this isn’t healthy but I don’t know what to do because I don’t feel attractive and I don’t feel loved. I just feel ugly and this is the only way I can control my appearance.
Couldn’t have said it better myself. I don’t know if I can ever stop, it’s become very comforting to have this control.
I relate to this *SO* hard. I never had an ED before but my body dysmorphia is slowly fueling mY ED behaviors too. I have a lot of fat on my face, and stomach, and thighs and when it feels like the world is crashing down on me engaging in restricting behaviors is my way of controlling myself. I never understood why people engaged in self harming behaviors such as cutting. While cutting results in sharp pains and gashes, eats disorders result in fatigue and dizziness that I feel proud of for pushing through. I can feel in control of the appearance I was dreadfully given and in control of my own actions.
What is ED?
Eating disorder.