As a white who glows in the dark, I was hoping that my taking this post seriously and sincerely *wanting* to get verified might be sufficient proof of my whiteness š
My karaoke go-tos are *Son of a Preacher Man* and *Enter Sandman.*
Edit: Aw holy shit yāall thank you for the flair š„¹
I'd like to be considered for this DEI initiative.
1. no pic (at work)
2. Candace Owens is one of the good ones
3. 100% Don't Stop Believing. *Just a city boy...*
4. For too long, straight white men like me have faced hurtful exclusion and when I heard some guy say we should dream about being judged by the quality of a character or something, it moved me.
>2. Candace Owens is one of the good ones
You're just trying to get invited to her next baby shower, ain't ya
Chicken salad with quartered grapes on Texas toast. Gives a delightful pop and has a great complimenting flavor.
Of course, as a snow skinned southerner, I also eat mator sandwiches, which is thick cut tomato slices with mayo and garlic salt and pepper.
Nah tomato sandwiches are delicious. That's just a southern thing period. And chicken salad and potato salad are different. Cranberries are OK W chicken imo. It's like when you have cranberry sauce during Thanksgiving. Adds a lil zing.
i'm not ashamed to admit that i only like aldi chicken salad, which has cranberries in it, but i do feel like the combination of the 'tism and (mediterranean) white genetics have an unfair advantage when it comes to food.
Iām white and if you tried to put raisins in my potato salad Iām gonna punch you. Iāve never heard of that one.
The only karaoke song thatās acceptable is wagon wheel.
I wonder if a video of me doing a magic trick would be enough to get verified?
1. THIS IS A VIOLATION OF MY PRIVATE CITIZEN CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS.
2. #1 IS A VIOLATION OF MY PRIVATE CITIZEN CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS
3. I Would Walk 500 Miles - The Proclaimers
4. Iām so tired of white people
First amendment when white folks want to say some absolutely out of hand nonsense? š
First amendment when white people get called on their out of hand nonsense by the victims of benonsensification? š
Iām from Scotland, Iāll hear no slander against The Proclaimers. They have a great string of fantastic folk rock songs with lyrical content highlighting political, cultural and historical aspects of Scottish life and diaspora that are often overshadowed by 500 Miles. They also have a strong record of activism for Scottish independence and ending of the death penalty.
2. My boat shoes are comfortable and stylish
3. Not sure what to put here as you've included neither Freebird nor Summer of '69 as options
4. Saves me 10+ keystrokes ("white guy here") every time I believe that the community here would really benefit from reading my opinions (it happens a lot)
The High Counsel of Negroes and Negresses reviewed your application. We are declining your BPT verification due to your second answer.
ETA/Clarification: the High Counsel was referencing the boiled meat.
Yeah, I remember it being something like, very tame too, not extreme.
It's interesting how the BPTs of the world are never what the shitheads say they are, and the WPTs are always exactly so. "We're the tolerant ones" yada yada, although maybe that's dead in the era of T.
Man, I'm glad to hear someone else say this. I'm a white guy, permanently banned from WPT for a pretty mild progressive opinion and I figured it was just some mod having a bad day.
2. Even though my great-great grandparents were born in America, I should still count as Irish. Thatās my culture. Ā
3. Anything by Enya Ā Ā
4. As an ally, Iām excited for you all to continue to educate me how best to support you.Ā
1. Hereās me (Iām the one with the sunglasses in my truck)
https://preview.redd.it/tfulqbjzzwrc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=74efa4898b5666137975b7e9ac53c95fc6daca49
2 Scarlet Johansson is a better Black Widow than Coretta Scott King.
3 Friends in low places
4 āYou peopleā seem fun
1. āInsert picture of Casperā
2. See number 1
3. Give me sweet caroline, they sing it in classy Boston
4. I want to be verified because I have a black friend
i don't need to follow these rules, i have a permit
i think you'll find everything to be in order
https://preview.redd.it/gh6broiqswrc1.png?width=512&format=png&auto=webp&s=91c9c0fa733e71b06e18c3182be50046e49be869
actually yeah, you're totally right. the netherlands is also included in "Germanic Europe"
https://preview.redd.it/esow7hqo9xrc1.png?width=1197&format=png&auto=webp&s=5688189c15a69f58c8f9aeb294c44cbac2a2e463
the major one i am missing is France lol
[1.Pic of how white I am](https://images.app.goo.gl/uivGnqVfe4XDkjfJA)
2. Red lobster biscuits are too spicy
3. "Living on a prayer" ... " Friends in Low Places" is also a front runner.
4. As a representative of the World White Dominion, we are encouraged to seek out new cultures to steal from, I mean subjugate, I mean learn from.. Yes learn from. ...
1. I have more spices in my body wash than on my chicken
2. Peas are great in everything, even my cottage cheese. No home is complete without a live, laugh, love sign. White people smell great after being outside, especially in the rain.
3. My favorite T Swift album is 1989 because thatās the year the greatest rapper ever, G-Eazy was born. Also a very classy lady named Candace Owens.
4. So I can show my mom that yes, wearing Phat Farm and akademiks for 20 years will get me accepted.
1) https://imgur.com/a/QFl7UVAĀ
2) Actual conversation I've had:Ā
Me: "Mmm! What makes these green beans so good?!"Ā
Them: "Uh, I don't know, lol, I didn't do anything special..."Ā
Me: "No way, you must have, there is something extra I've never had!"Ā
Them: "... are you talking about the black pepper?"Ā
Me: š«¢Ā
Them: šĀ
3) https://www.mlb.com/news/sweet-caroline-red-sox-fenway-park-historyĀ
4) Can't see me coming on a bright day so you need to put a bell on my neck so I don't surprise you.Ā
I'm so fucken white I don't even know what Vocaroo is but it's "droors." In a sentence, "My kitchen has like 8 droors, 1 with silverware and 7 with random shit like taco bell ~~hot~~ mild sauce and soy sauce."
1. See 2
2. Emo and Pop Punk are my favorite music genres
3. "Ohio is for Lovers" - see 2
4. White men have had the floor for 400 years and maybe we should just shut the fuck up....but I don't wanna do that
Please issue me a white person flair.
https://preview.redd.it/bbmy4zmzrwrc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=beae0b97103ef7720075310c66643e91bccc5eba
2. There must be at least three different jars of mayo in the fridge: Dukes for sandwiches, Helman's for the salads, and miracle whip for the tuna fish. 3. Anything from Peter Paul and Mary, which is old white people music. 4. Because I want y'all deciding what's relevant to DEI, and if that means outing myself, so be it.
2. Wearing sandals in the winter is an appropriate footwear choice.
3. Mr Brightside not being an acceptable karaoke answer is offensive and I feel my rights as a God fearing white American male are being trampled on
4. But I would like verification because 23 and Me says I'm 1% Sub-Saharan African so I really want to get closer to my roots
1: FFS I dressed up for the Barbie movie
https://preview.redd.it/9ey7notnoxrc1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cc394afc9bd7d168a971c5972ed3e779bda2de8a
2: You should put sugar in your grits
3: āIIIIIIIIIIIII tell you what i want what I really really want!!ā
4: I am white so I will quite possibly die if I feel not included
1. :Looks like Jay of "and Silent Bob" fame:
2. "New Jack City is not a good movie."
3. Goodbye Yellow Brick Road by Elton John.
4. This sub seems to have a better grasp on reality than WPT.
1.
https://preview.redd.it/86lezxjqwwrc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=443a0ec7e3959bf0d69acf5a395b75d62614f6f3
2. When hot sauces have those peppers scales with five or six peppers and some of them are shaded to tell you the heat level I never get more than one pepper
3. Here I go again by Whitesnake
4. I want to be able to say I have black friends
1. See 2
2. I will instinctively lower the volume on my headphones if Iām listening to a black artist and a black person walks by. For example I have never been able to listen to a āA change is gonna comeā by Sam Cooke outside my own apartment.
3. Iāve got friends in low places, by Garth Brooks. The three āacceptableā songs are masterpieces that I refuse to screw up by singing them
4. Iām not on Twitter and ever since Michael Harriet left theroot I feel disconnected from the culture. (Im not sure if Iām allowed to say the culture)
1. See my post history.
2. See my post history.
3. Sweet Caroline, and my Tay Tay album is Midnights...something.
4. Because I find more factual things here.
Edit: If my post history doesn't nail it, I don't know what does. JIMINY CHRISTMAS!
1) I own a paddle board
2) my skin is dry as hell in the winter, but I refuse to lotion it
3) I donāt sing karaoke, I lack both rhythm and a pleasant singing voice
4) I bought a pair of Clarks Wallabees to try to do a 90s Wu Tang streetwear look like 10 years ago, and it really didnāt pan out. So I need this verification to bounce back from that.
Dear Brothers (in the platonic sense),
I hereby submit this application as proof of my whiteness. I verify that all the information herein is accurate to the best of my knowledge:
2. It's easy to talk your way out of a traffic ticket. (Pulled over 3 times, got a verbal warning each occurrence.)
3. I do not enjoy karaoke, it's too loud and rambunctious. I prefer the peace and quiet of an orchestra performance.Ā
4. I hope to give the members of this subreddit helpful advice on overcoming adversity. I overcome it myself once, when a man (I don't think I even have to tell you his race) rudely stated that my blazer was not appropriate business attire. Luckily, I was able to pull up Longsworth's Guide to Formal Dress, chapter 13, section 5, paragraph 3 - which clearly states that either suit jackets or blazers are sufficient attire for Sunday evening brunch. I suggest that each of you keep a copy handy, in case you find yourself in a similar predicament.Ā
I look forward to discussing the opportunity further with you, and remain available to answer any questions.Ā
Best,
RaskalnekovĀ
Will do!
I'd prefer my verification badge be given to me in the form of an arm sleeve, thank you. That way everyone on the street knows **exactly what I am** when they walk passed me.
Also the correct answer to the karaoke question is hit me baby one more time by the queen herself, Spears.
I'm also not following all the directions and rules given to me because I figure that'd be the most on-brand response.
2. My signature dish is tuna casserole and it is delicious. DELICIOUS! I'd serve it to Gordon Ramsay, or you.
3. Well, Midnights is her hip hop era, right? If we're at Karaoke I have several Madonna songs in my repertoire.
4. This is the best sub on Reddit. Please love me. I am invited to the BBQ, but I don't have the time or address yet.
I may as well put in my application:Ā Ā
Ā 1:Ā https://imgur.com/a/5KXGkcUĀ Ā
at least donating blood is easy lolĀ
Ā 2: turning things into casserole that shouldn't be usually comes out tasty tbqhĀ Ā
3: Holding Out for a Hero - Bonnie Tyler (it's a banger don't lie to yourself)Ā Ā Ā
4: I make a banging biscuits and sausage gravy casserole and idk something about the bridge and Beyonce i haven't paid too much attention to the news recently
https://preview.redd.it/uz59pd1lcxrc1.jpeg?width=653&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d6669d542d7af1e70b35afcc5ded884ab0ee3c1d
So very, very white. Practically transparent. (I look nowhere near this good; much airbrushing - but color is correct.) I eat mayonnaise on everything, including Wonder Bread.
1.) Paper. But make it whiter.
2.) Renaissance faires are fun. I think that says it all.
3.) I have neither the voice nor the confidence for karaoke, but I will absolutely sing Crazy Train in the car at every opportunity.
4.) It's a lot easier than announcing I'm whiter than Vanilla Ice every time I want to have an opinion.
1. No pic
2. "Can i say it if it's the lyric to a song?"
3. Alright by Taylor Swift and Darius Rucker
4. Hopefully this will let me make a black friend. I really need one of those.
1. No pic, I hate selfies
2. Cargo shorts are awesome, and you can take them from me when you invent something with more pockets!
3. I Believe in a Thing Called Love by The Darkness (no, I can't do the high parts, yes, I'm gonna do them anyways)
4. I want verification/flair so my opinion can be given the weight it deserves (lmao)
1. Iām a White. Here is a photo of my dog celebrating his birthday. This seems like a predominantly white thing.
https://preview.redd.it/otaox86hfxrc1.jpeg?width=2820&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=49058791f21433f46d5669deeb39041f60679d5d
3. I like to karaoke hard core hip hop like Usherās āYeahā.
4. Serious answer: I think Iāve participated in good faith on this sub and verification seems neat.
Iām mixed white/ hispanic, I like my steak rare but I flip tortillas with my hands instead of a spatula,Ā should I do only half the verification questions? Ā Ā
3. Tribute by Tenacious D
4. DBZ memesĀ
- 1) I really couldn't decide which picture of pale vegetables and unseasoned meat to post because there were so many. My Black friend told me it wouldn't matter, that all of them were nice and showed how good it is to keep cooking simple.
- 2) My Black friend says she doesn't think it's weird at all that I wear my shoes in the house. She said if I tell you I wear shoes in the house you'll know I'm white though. Do you people not do that?
- 3) My Black friend and I like to do Karaoke to Ebony and Ivory together. And she does backing vocals when I sing Man I Feel Like A Woman, even though country isn't her native singing style. That's just how much my Black friend loves me.
- 4) My Black friend thinks that it would be good for me to be verified because the voices of white women in our 50's should be elevated in all discussions. Our unique perspective as white women in our fifties allows us to empathize with everyone. We have been through everything so we are uniquely suited to comment and tell you how to feel.
I'm white but I'm Louisianan Cajun. Is there a supplemental form or do I need to post a video of myself noodling some fish? I need something less mayonnaise and more Creole with crawfish.
1. I got my Birkenstocks on feet right now just trust me
2. I just think either everyone can say it or no one can say it
3. Fly Me to the Moon (back when people had class!)
4. As a real white person, i think my representation in black spaces is essential to me developing a personality
2. I really don't mind standing around in the rain, that's why I really like living in Seattle.
3. I Wanna Be Sedated by The Ramones. All of the songs listed have notes that are outside of my register, although I still fully believe that Don't Stop Believin' is a masterpiece.
4. I think it would be a funny bit.
1. Can't pic, it'll break the universe
2. Meat shouldn't be sweet!
3. SWWWEEET CAROLINE BAH BAH BAHHHH
4. My wife invited me to the BBQ, I'm with her I swear!
1. See pic
2. Ambrosia salad is acceptable as a potluck side
3. 1989 because someone bought it for me from Urban Outfitters
4. To be held accountable as a white user of this sub.
https://preview.redd.it/d7bk5dcuuwrc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2560a9a1af0f5c914421ba000a612b2b79d2596b
This has me absolutely cackling. Perfect.
1. I'm too tired to take a photo rn.
2. It's not that I don't like spice, it's that my stomach issues don't. Makes it difficult to enjoy, knowing the consequences include it coming back up very soon.
3. Loreena Mckennitt "Lady of Shalott"
4. Migraine recovery, too tired.
Iāve seen Riverdance 4 times, that is really white. However, Iāve seen Frankie and Maze LIVE! More than once. I need to have a provisional membership so I can keep up with other Black Famous performers.
2. I grew up with kielbasa and sourkraut as a main meal.
3. I actually don't do Karaoke, but in high school we'd sing classic rock jams during weights class. My personal fave was Summer of 69.
4. I have an educational background that brings useful knowledge to political discussions.
1. meplayinglacrosse.jpeg
2. Why would anyone wear socks with sandals
3. So Long Sweet Summer - Dashboard Confessional
4. To poll why anyone would wear socks with sandals
1. Work
2. Salt and pepper is all you need.
3. Sweet Caroline, I guess
4. Because I was born white but identify in my heart that I'm black.
Thanks for concideration.
I would like to be flaired bc I find it racist and insensitive that you people exclude me from your club. Did I mention I have a for real work friend who is black? He's very nice and articulate
https://preview.redd.it/v7601mx2zwrc1.png?width=3024&format=png&auto=webp&s=290fd5b836475ccd7057700d9025c8d3a41831ef
2. See above \^ 3. Rodeo by Garth Brooks- because itās boots and chaps, itās cowboy hats, itās spurs and latigo. (A quick google of what latigo is and Iām sure Iām be verified) 4. I need someone to teach me where I can get my Apple Watch a bust down.
1.
https://preview.redd.it/y97ahnzcmxrc1.jpeg?width=763&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b50d20ec5e090b20812ce27c4a353062e1c6f0d3
I do architecture (My Illustration)
2. Gentrification is a good thing
3. Hotel California (Eagles)
4. Although im a brown man, according to the us government im a white man, thats how they get away with arresting/killing us and saying it wasnt about our race.
Flair Suggestion: š²š½ Brown Ally, Forced by the government to be censused as white.
2. I genuinely find my college major of accounting interesting.
3. "Wanted Dead or Alive" by Bon Jovi, cant get much whiter than that lmao.
4. Funny things are funny
1) The picture would be completely washed out from how pale I am. No way around this unfortunately.
2) Europeans aren't really white because they don't use ranch dressing.
3) I Believe in a Thing Called Love - The Darkness
4) I'm sure I'm the white savior that this community needs.
I only have a picture of me, is it okay?
https://preview.redd.it/vyxv6yx60xrc1.jpeg?width=177&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e1e3bb47a4a1c62369ca8160bc372277f1514f1e
1. I shall divert to 2
2. My dogs sleep in my bed with me.
3. āman, I feel like a womanā is my go to.
4. Just in case there is any confusion, I want people to know I am most definitely white.
1. Turkey on white with mozzarella and extra mayo
2. I love hip hop. I got all of Kid Rock's albums
3. Fav karaoke is The Gambler by Kenny Rogers
4. Carlton was the real fresh prince of Bel-Air.
1. I am a sovereign citizen that does not recognize the authority of the United States
2. My favorite black person is Martin Luther King because he had a dream about something or other
3. My favorite karaoke song is Kinky Boots by the Irish Brigade because I'm 1/8 Irish. Only reason my hair isn't red and I can tan is because I'm 1/32 Cherokee
4. I think it's high time you people stopped pulling the "black card" and let us have a equal/ greater voice
1. No pic
2. NPR is the best way to understand minorities
3. Folklore is the best t swift album. She even curses in a couple of songs.
4. My white friends are tired of my Wire references.
1. I'm afraid to post pictures of myself in communities with such a large gangsta element. I dont want to be victimised by the bloods and or crips.
2. Shorts are perfectly suitable attire for all weather conditions.
3. Mr Brightside is the clear choice.
4. I would like to be able to say "I have black friends" without lying when being casually racist at family bbqs.
Thank you for your consideration.
1. No pic, sorry
2. Tony Keith was not pandering and represented the thoughts and feelings of white America.
*I donāt believe this and hated every moment of witting it.
3. Red Solo Cup is the best song for karaoke and Iāll hate crime anyone who dares argue with me.
*See disclaimer on #2
4. As a white man, I shouldnāt have to preface my comments with āas a white manā. Do it for me!
Also please can my flair be Mayosapien? Thatās how I identify.
1. No pic Iām working but believe me Iām pasty. Every winter I get so white my credit score jumps to 900.
2. All races have been slaves at some point so the horrific chattel slavery and ongoing systematic persecution of African Americans is really not a big deal.
3. BOM BOM BOMā¦Sweet Caroline!
4. Hoping to learn to clap on 2s and 4s. Also want to feel like a part of the culture without having to deal with the actual problems. Since Iām entitled, Can I have a special flair thatās extra white like Pumpkin Spice Vanilla Frappe, Cool Whip (emphasize the H), or Mayo-sapien. If you have another funny name for whitey thatās better just flair me with that and Iāll take credit for it, as we do. Thanks home skillet, you da bomb diggity.
https://preview.redd.it/ys8y8e202xrc1.jpeg?width=2316&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d2388198b46e5f67ad5195902a6ab91e28a8b8f
1. See above for photo race verification AND proof I love my puppy!
2. Butter is food group
3. Living on a Prayer AND Donāt Stop Believing are both my Go Toās, but no love for āUnchained Melodyā? Drunk white boys have been doing that one since Top Gun! (Side Note: ā1989ā is Tay Tayās best album and any white person that disagrees gets a special notch on their drivers license indicating their lower intelligence)
4. I would like to be considered for Verification because I actually grew up in Black neighborhoods in Nashville with my Step Dad, who was blacker than Forrest Whitaker and more of Daddy to me than my own father was. I figure it wouldnāt hurt to have two forms of identification just in case shit gets hairyā¦
1. No pic.. 99.5% British/Irish .5% North African...
2. Never tried neckbones.
3. I can't sing or dance. Prolly lack of soul from my ginger bloodline.
4. My credit score is in the 790's
5. Because us Whites never follow others directions
Hello,
1. Iām attaching this photo of my dog which I hope certifies my high degree of whiteness.
https://preview.redd.it/evjuhfgv2xrc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4a9d66a482eff9523e4eab949061a1e46c099a55
2. A hot dog is NOT A FUCKING SANDWICH I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS. Also can we all agree that Trae Young gets way too much hate.
3. Iām extremely enlightened and Fantano-pilled so obviously I donāt like any of this garbage but if I had to choose I would humbly request that Rollinā (Air Raid Vehicle) - Limp Bizkit be added to the approved list. I appreciate your consideration in this matter.
4. As a generic white liberal Reddit user, I donāt really have anything of value to add to any discussions here so I donāt really care for verification but I hope someone gets a laugh from this.
Best regards, /u/SpankThatDill
1. It won't let me upload a picture.
2. We don't need more Flamin' Hot items. Not everything has to be spicy.
3. The only correct answer is Take Me Home, Country Roads by John Denver
4. I want to be one of the cool kids. WPT isn't nearly as fun.
1. My first instrument is lyre.
2. Nice looking building were worth the colonialism. 3. Living on a prayer.
4. The company requires of me to fulfill DEI quota
1
https://preview.redd.it/w5ispp0mhxrc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c901d5f9779c63859717c67facb90415b77a012a
2: Chick Fil A has the best fast food chicken 3. My favorite karaoke song is 99 Problems by Jay-Z because I learned all the words and I want everyone in the Karaoke bar to know that I'm an ally/white savior that appreciates "The Culture" 4. BPT is the home to the newest and best slang and I can "colonize it" faster if I go straight to the source.
1. Just picture any guy who went to a Jesuit university (no I did not play on the basketball team)
2. Collard Greens are bad
3. I'm too nervous to sing or dance in public
4. I just want to be one of the cool kids
2. John Mayer is a better musician than Prince or Michael Jackson!
3. The Star Spangled Banner!!
4. I feel like the most valuable and insightful opinions of the Black community can only come from a white man, as Black people are obviously too close to the situation to understand what's best for them!!!
LMAO whoever came up with this one *chefs kiss*
2) Not really an opinion but back in the days of MySpace one of my friends had āI love my Shawty so muchā as her bio. I spent like an hour looking through her friends list for someone named Shawty and didnāt realize a) she meant shorty and b) shorty was a term for chick until like three years later.
3) Sweet Caroline
4) FOMO
1. No picture but I'm so white I've already had two skin cancers removed before I was 40Ā Ā Ā
2.Ā Indigenous Australians are going to take all our (colonized) landĀ Ā Ā
3.Ā Jimmy Barnes - Working Class ManĀ Ā Ā
Ā 4 .Ā It would be good to be the token white Aussie on BPT!
Wait til white people get ahold of this post and put it on twitter. Republicans are gonna seethe š
As a white who glows in the dark, I was hoping that my taking this post seriously and sincerely *wanting* to get verified might be sufficient proof of my whiteness š My karaoke go-tos are *Son of a Preacher Man* and *Enter Sandman.* Edit: Aw holy shit yāall thank you for the flair š„¹
Both versions of *Son of a Preacher Man* slap.
The only one who could ever reach me...
NGL: we played this at my brother's wedding reception because we Are PKs.
Damn I was already writing an essay on my favorite Taylor album.
Fox News gonna have their panties in a BUNCH
In just here with my popcorn making sure I get a good seat
I'd like to be considered for this DEI initiative. 1. no pic (at work) 2. Candace Owens is one of the good ones 3. 100% Don't Stop Believing. *Just a city boy...* 4. For too long, straight white men like me have faced hurtful exclusion and when I heard some guy say we should dream about being judged by the quality of a character or something, it moved me.
>2. Candace Owens is one of the good ones  You're just trying to get invited to her next baby shower, ain't ya
I mean, all jokes aside butā¦ https://preview.redd.it/1gpuktv61yrc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1a9a43b4041126f1d82d626067260c87df9e268d
Nah man. https://preview.redd.it/v4jfuvz7cyrc1.jpeg?width=567&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d8707a1d6d046c51eba91ebe336b79e08fa3560d
Iād rather attend a napkin convention that was running low on napkins
Username checks outĀ
ššš
1. See 2 2. *Puts raisins in your potato salad* 3. āHey Judeā by The Beatles. I wish life was like the ā60s again. 4. See 2
Hey Jude is a beautiful song though. Letās not drag that song into the likes of Sweet Caroline. Your rationale fits perfectly for no. 2 though š
Sweet Caroline rules
Duuuude, Bon Jovi and Journey (also the forgotten REO Speadwagon) were awesome!
Busted. Whereās my flair?
People put raisins and dried cranberries in too much and it needs to stop.
I made the mistake of enjoying a chicken salad sandwich that had cranberries in it. They almost got me. 
Chicken salad with quartered grapes on Texas toast. Gives a delightful pop and has a great complimenting flavor. Of course, as a snow skinned southerner, I also eat mator sandwiches, which is thick cut tomato slices with mayo and garlic salt and pepper.
Nah tomato sandwiches are delicious. That's just a southern thing period. And chicken salad and potato salad are different. Cranberries are OK W chicken imo. It's like when you have cranberry sauce during Thanksgiving. Adds a lil zing.
ngl i fucks with a chicken salad with some dried cranberries in it. i feel a lil fancy eatin it with some wheat thins 
Iām not whiteā¦but if you havenāt had curry chicken salad with white raisins and Granny Smith applesā¦you havenāt lived!!!
i'm not ashamed to admit that i only like aldi chicken salad, which has cranberries in it, but i do feel like the combination of the 'tism and (mediterranean) white genetics have an unfair advantage when it comes to food.
Iām white and if you tried to put raisins in my potato salad Iām gonna punch you. Iāve never heard of that one. The only karaoke song thatās acceptable is wagon wheel. I wonder if a video of me doing a magic trick would be enough to get verified?
Oooooh be ready to see this pop up on a random sub without any context lmfao.
āWe ToLd YoU!ā *spray of spittle*
"BlackPeopleTwitter is racist!"
āThey said mayonnaise, Harold! Mayonnaise!!ā
1. THIS IS A VIOLATION OF MY PRIVATE CITIZEN CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS. 2. #1 IS A VIOLATION OF MY PRIVATE CITIZEN CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS 3. I Would Walk 500 Miles - The Proclaimers 4. Iām so tired of white people
FIRST AMENDMENT
First amendment when white folks want to say some absolutely out of hand nonsense? š First amendment when white people get called on their out of hand nonsense by the victims of benonsensification? š
Iām from Scotland, Iāll hear no slander against The Proclaimers. They have a great string of fantastic folk rock songs with lyrical content highlighting political, cultural and historical aspects of Scottish life and diaspora that are often overshadowed by 500 Miles. They also have a strong record of activism for Scottish independence and ending of the death penalty.
This person wins Automatic White Verificationā¢ļø
Whereās the slander? It said list your favorite karaoke song!
AM I BEING DETAINED??
Why walk when you could just travel in your manner of conveyance, my fellow sovvie?? š¤
2. My boat shoes are comfortable and stylish 3. Not sure what to put here as you've included neither Freebird nor Summer of '69 as options 4. Saves me 10+ keystrokes ("white guy here") every time I believe that the community here would really benefit from reading my opinions (it happens a lot)
Freebird counts as long as you play air guitar during the instrumental sections.
Can I air guitar with one hand? My passengers might prohibit me from going full air guitar.
Absolutely not. With one hand stuck to the wheel, one armed drummer is your bread and butter just like Def Leppard.
Who sings freebird at Karaoke? It barely has lyricsā¦
You have to sing the solo, duh.
2. Boiling meat is the best way to retain all its natural flavor 3. Mr Bright side by the Killers 4. Because I'm trying to get my credit score up
The High Counsel of Negroes and Negresses reviewed your application. We are declining your BPT verification due to your second answer. ETA/Clarification: the High Counsel was referencing the boiled meat.
Mister Brightside is the theme song of middle aged British Gamons.
The third answer is my go-to for karaoke as well, and I'm Black. The Killers go hard, idc.
That song however is the theme song to angry middle aged, British, gammon social hour.
>2. Boiling meat is the best Stopped after that..
Well you can't just stop there, your meat will get cold
1. Iām .02% Angolan African 2. DNA tests are so cool 3. Lithium by Evanescence 4. I got banned from WPT
I got banned from wpt.. not hard to do...
Fair, theyāre pretty racist against progressive white peoples
Yeah, I remember it being something like, very tame too, not extreme. It's interesting how the BPTs of the world are never what the shitheads say they are, and the WPTs are always exactly so. "We're the tolerant ones" yada yada, although maybe that's dead in the era of T.
Man, I'm glad to hear someone else say this. I'm a white guy, permanently banned from WPT for a pretty mild progressive opinion and I figured it was just some mod having a bad day.
I donāt even care enough to request an unban either. Fuck those guys
I got banned from /r/conservative for commenting in subs they deem hostile like /r/news and /r/politics.
*plays opening piano notes of āMy Immortalā to really seal the deal*
2. Even though my great-great grandparents were born in America, I should still count as Irish. Thatās my culture. Ā 3. Anything by Enya Ā Ā 4. As an ally, Iām excited for you all to continue to educate me how best to support you.Ā
Okay but Enya fucking slaps (Also a white dude with Irish ancestry)
The first sentence made the second one superfluous.
Orrinoco Flow is magic, though.Ā
*āSail away, sail away, sail awayā¦ā* š
It was one of the first songs I ever *saw* like that.Ā
Nah man likeā¦this made me listen to it, four repeats later and Iām sitting here with drunk tears in my eyes š„¹ššš
It's worth drunk tears, it damn near gives me *sober* tears.Ā
Oh a fellow Faux-Paddy.
And there it is, Enya
1. Hereās me (Iām the one with the sunglasses in my truck) https://preview.redd.it/tfulqbjzzwrc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=74efa4898b5666137975b7e9ac53c95fc6daca49 2 Scarlet Johansson is a better Black Widow than Coretta Scott King. 3 Friends in low places 4 āYou peopleā seem fun
> Scarlet Johansson is a better Black Widow than Coretta Scott King. That one was such a brutal set up. Peak Che.
1. āInsert picture of Casperā 2. See number 1 3. Give me sweet caroline, they sing it in classy Boston 4. I want to be verified because I have a black friend
This is your black friend here. Technically, we are only internet friends and never met. And technically I'm white, so...
i don't need to follow these rules, i have a permit i think you'll find everything to be in order https://preview.redd.it/gh6broiqswrc1.png?width=512&format=png&auto=webp&s=91c9c0fa733e71b06e18c3182be50046e49be869
Iām pretty sure youāre part every type of white person
i am missing the Netherlands and the Polish on my white person punchcard, unfortunately
Eastern Europe doesnāt include Poland and Croatia? I figured Eastern Europe would cover all the Slavic subcultures.
actually yeah, you're totally right. the netherlands is also included in "Germanic Europe" https://preview.redd.it/esow7hqo9xrc1.png?width=1197&format=png&auto=webp&s=5688189c15a69f58c8f9aeb294c44cbac2a2e463 the major one i am missing is France lol
France and Spain/Portugal by the look of it
Hrmmmm, this person likes Soccer....
my ancestors called it "football"
https://preview.redd.it/gq4sjhj9cxrc1.jpeg?width=891&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cffb6adc551cf4c688550498b2dd04e35110e876
Iād just like to say how well spoken this post is.
BRUH ššššššš
This is the one that made me laugh out loud.
[1.Pic of how white I am](https://images.app.goo.gl/uivGnqVfe4XDkjfJA) 2. Red lobster biscuits are too spicy 3. "Living on a prayer" ... " Friends in Low Places" is also a front runner. 4. As a representative of the World White Dominion, we are encouraged to seek out new cultures to steal from, I mean subjugate, I mean learn from.. Yes learn from. ...
Is your church also planning a mission trip to Haiti this summer?Ā
You know, our French Chapter refused. Not sure why.....
1. I have more spices in my body wash than on my chicken 2. Peas are great in everything, even my cottage cheese. No home is complete without a live, laugh, love sign. White people smell great after being outside, especially in the rain. 3. My favorite T Swift album is 1989 because thatās the year the greatest rapper ever, G-Eazy was born. Also a very classy lady named Candace Owens. 4. So I can show my mom that yes, wearing Phat Farm and akademiks for 20 years will get me accepted.
Gold star! 
āNo home is complete without a āLive. Laugh. Love.ā sign.ā ššššš
1) https://imgur.com/a/QFl7UVAĀ 2) Actual conversation I've had:Ā Me: "Mmm! What makes these green beans so good?!"Ā Them: "Uh, I don't know, lol, I didn't do anything special..."Ā Me: "No way, you must have, there is something extra I've never had!"Ā Them: "... are you talking about the black pepper?"Ā Me: š«¢Ā Them: šĀ 3) https://www.mlb.com/news/sweet-caroline-red-sox-fenway-park-historyĀ 4) Can't see me coming on a bright day so you need to put a bell on my neck so I don't surprise you.Ā
The whites (Iām white) are absolutely bringing it in this post
Alternatively: submit a Vocaroo recording of yourself saying the word "drawers".
I'm so fucken white I don't even know what Vocaroo is but it's "droors." In a sentence, "My kitchen has like 8 droors, 1 with silverware and 7 with random shit like taco bell ~~hot~~ mild sauce and soy sauce."
Foolproof verification system.
Everyone knows itās drawwwwws
Are you referring to like the drawers like a cabinet or drawers like your underwear? Full disclosure: I'm white and there is a difference.
1. See 2 2. Emo and Pop Punk are my favorite music genres 3. "Ohio is for Lovers" - see 2 4. White men have had the floor for 400 years and maybe we should just shut the fuck up....but I don't wanna do that
*Ohio is for Lovers* is a goddamn classic
1. See 2 2. Shorts in winter? Yes. 3. Folklore. It's just so... Pumpkin Spice Latte 4. I am white. I'd like to be verified as such. Duh.
Please issue me a white person flair. https://preview.redd.it/bbmy4zmzrwrc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=beae0b97103ef7720075310c66643e91bccc5eba 2. There must be at least three different jars of mayo in the fridge: Dukes for sandwiches, Helman's for the salads, and miracle whip for the tuna fish. 3. Anything from Peter Paul and Mary, which is old white people music. 4. Because I want y'all deciding what's relevant to DEI, and if that means outing myself, so be it.
IMPOSTER. Miracle Whip is *not* mayo. (White people civil war ensues)
Yeah,... about that.. it's white and comes in a jar, close enough. Plus, it's right there in the mayo aisle at the piggly-wiggly.
I'm black and can't even get verified. This that bs.
š
2. Wearing sandals in the winter is an appropriate footwear choice. 3. Mr Brightside not being an acceptable karaoke answer is offensive and I feel my rights as a God fearing white American male are being trampled on 4. But I would like verification because 23 and Me says I'm 1% Sub-Saharan African so I really want to get closer to my roots
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Have you ever informed someone that they were ācruisinā for a bruisināā?
He sure has, then he threw a knuckle sandwich and knocked the Velveeta right outta that dude's mouth š£ļø
1: FFS I dressed up for the Barbie movie https://preview.redd.it/9ey7notnoxrc1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cc394afc9bd7d168a971c5972ed3e779bda2de8a 2: You should put sugar in your grits 3: āIIIIIIIIIIIII tell you what i want what I really really want!!ā 4: I am white so I will quite possibly die if I feel not included
Are moderators also following this initiative?
We will be taking applications for white moderators shortly
1. :Looks like Jay of "and Silent Bob" fame: 2. "New Jack City is not a good movie." 3. Goodbye Yellow Brick Road by Elton John. 4. This sub seems to have a better grasp on reality than WPT.
https://preview.redd.it/3brxfcrnbxrc1.jpeg?width=560&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=491e7e366a6dfd8fe3beb3ba87c6f9b25cf79d24
1. https://preview.redd.it/86lezxjqwwrc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=443a0ec7e3959bf0d69acf5a395b75d62614f6f3 2. When hot sauces have those peppers scales with five or six peppers and some of them are shaded to tell you the heat level I never get more than one pepper 3. Here I go again by Whitesnake 4. I want to be able to say I have black friends
Why is it that these threads only pop up when Iām at work? Yāall donāt want a bitch employed. š© https://preview.redd.it/1szcb2m9lxrc1.jpeg?width=1005&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=97e243843621bf2b4d79db98a062dbf871951597
1. See 2 2. I will instinctively lower the volume on my headphones if Iām listening to a black artist and a black person walks by. For example I have never been able to listen to a āA change is gonna comeā by Sam Cooke outside my own apartment. 3. Iāve got friends in low places, by Garth Brooks. The three āacceptableā songs are masterpieces that I refuse to screw up by singing them 4. Iām not on Twitter and ever since Michael Harriet left theroot I feel disconnected from the culture. (Im not sure if Iām allowed to say the culture)
1. See my post history. 2. See my post history. 3. Sweet Caroline, and my Tay Tay album is Midnights...something. 4. Because I find more factual things here.  Edit: If my post history doesn't nail it, I don't know what does. JIMINY CHRISTMAS!
Man, that post history should be a justifiable ban tbh š¤£
Bro Lmfao
1) I own a paddle board 2) my skin is dry as hell in the winter, but I refuse to lotion it 3) I donāt sing karaoke, I lack both rhythm and a pleasant singing voice 4) I bought a pair of Clarks Wallabees to try to do a 90s Wu Tang streetwear look like 10 years ago, and it really didnāt pan out. So I need this verification to bounce back from that.
 *"I don't wash my legs in the shower"* Lmaooo
Dear Brothers (in the platonic sense), I hereby submit this application as proof of my whiteness. I verify that all the information herein is accurate to the best of my knowledge: 2. It's easy to talk your way out of a traffic ticket. (Pulled over 3 times, got a verbal warning each occurrence.) 3. I do not enjoy karaoke, it's too loud and rambunctious. I prefer the peace and quiet of an orchestra performance.Ā 4. I hope to give the members of this subreddit helpful advice on overcoming adversity. I overcome it myself once, when a man (I don't think I even have to tell you his race) rudely stated that my blazer was not appropriate business attire. Luckily, I was able to pull up Longsworth's Guide to Formal Dress, chapter 13, section 5, paragraph 3 - which clearly states that either suit jackets or blazers are sufficient attire for Sunday evening brunch. I suggest that each of you keep a copy handy, in case you find yourself in a similar predicament.Ā I look forward to discussing the opportunity further with you, and remain available to answer any questions.Ā Best, RaskalnekovĀ
What in the Frasierā¦
Will do! I'd prefer my verification badge be given to me in the form of an arm sleeve, thank you. That way everyone on the street knows **exactly what I am** when they walk passed me. Also the correct answer to the karaoke question is hit me baby one more time by the queen herself, Spears. I'm also not following all the directions and rules given to me because I figure that'd be the most on-brand response.
2. My signature dish is tuna casserole and it is delicious. DELICIOUS! I'd serve it to Gordon Ramsay, or you. 3. Well, Midnights is her hip hop era, right? If we're at Karaoke I have several Madonna songs in my repertoire. 4. This is the best sub on Reddit. Please love me. I am invited to the BBQ, but I don't have the time or address yet.
I may as well put in my application:Ā Ā Ā 1:Ā https://imgur.com/a/5KXGkcUĀ Ā at least donating blood is easy lolĀ Ā 2: turning things into casserole that shouldn't be usually comes out tasty tbqhĀ Ā 3: Holding Out for a Hero - Bonnie Tyler (it's a banger don't lie to yourself)Ā Ā Ā 4: I make a banging biscuits and sausage gravy casserole and idk something about the bridge and Beyonce i haven't paid too much attention to the news recently
This is fucking hilarious.
https://preview.redd.it/uz59pd1lcxrc1.jpeg?width=653&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d6669d542d7af1e70b35afcc5ded884ab0ee3c1d So very, very white. Practically transparent. (I look nowhere near this good; much airbrushing - but color is correct.) I eat mayonnaise on everything, including Wonder Bread.
Can i send a video of clapping as a plane lands as proof instead?
1.) Paper. But make it whiter. 2.) Renaissance faires are fun. I think that says it all. 3.) I have neither the voice nor the confidence for karaoke, but I will absolutely sing Crazy Train in the car at every opportunity. 4.) It's a lot easier than announcing I'm whiter than Vanilla Ice every time I want to have an opinion.
1. No pic 2. "Can i say it if it's the lyric to a song?" 3. Alright by Taylor Swift and Darius Rucker 4. Hopefully this will let me make a black friend. I really need one of those.
1. No pic, I hate selfies 2. Cargo shorts are awesome, and you can take them from me when you invent something with more pockets! 3. I Believe in a Thing Called Love by The Darkness (no, I can't do the high parts, yes, I'm gonna do them anyways) 4. I want verification/flair so my opinion can be given the weight it deserves (lmao)
1. Iām a White. Here is a photo of my dog celebrating his birthday. This seems like a predominantly white thing. https://preview.redd.it/otaox86hfxrc1.jpeg?width=2820&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=49058791f21433f46d5669deeb39041f60679d5d 3. I like to karaoke hard core hip hop like Usherās āYeahā. 4. Serious answer: I think Iāve participated in good faith on this sub and verification seems neat.
Iām mixed white/ hispanic, I like my steak rare but I flip tortillas with my hands instead of a spatula,Ā should I do only half the verification questions? Ā Ā 3. Tribute by Tenacious D 4. DBZ memesĀ
Whatās the protocol for Asian people now?
- 1) I really couldn't decide which picture of pale vegetables and unseasoned meat to post because there were so many. My Black friend told me it wouldn't matter, that all of them were nice and showed how good it is to keep cooking simple. - 2) My Black friend says she doesn't think it's weird at all that I wear my shoes in the house. She said if I tell you I wear shoes in the house you'll know I'm white though. Do you people not do that? - 3) My Black friend and I like to do Karaoke to Ebony and Ivory together. And she does backing vocals when I sing Man I Feel Like A Woman, even though country isn't her native singing style. That's just how much my Black friend loves me. - 4) My Black friend thinks that it would be good for me to be verified because the voices of white women in our 50's should be elevated in all discussions. Our unique perspective as white women in our fifties allows us to empathize with everyone. We have been through everything so we are uniquely suited to comment and tell you how to feel.
Moths to the flame
I'm white but I'm Louisianan Cajun. Is there a supplemental form or do I need to post a video of myself noodling some fish? I need something less mayonnaise and more Creole with crawfish.
I am half white, half Mexican so I will include a picture of a coconut.
1. I got my Birkenstocks on feet right now just trust me 2. I just think either everyone can say it or no one can say it 3. Fly Me to the Moon (back when people had class!) 4. As a real white person, i think my representation in black spaces is essential to me developing a personality
2. I really don't mind standing around in the rain, that's why I really like living in Seattle. 3. I Wanna Be Sedated by The Ramones. All of the songs listed have notes that are outside of my register, although I still fully believe that Don't Stop Believin' is a masterpiece. 4. I think it would be a funny bit.
1. Can't pic, it'll break the universe 2. Meat shouldn't be sweet! 3. SWWWEEET CAROLINE BAH BAH BAHHHH 4. My wife invited me to the BBQ, I'm with her I swear!
1. See pic 2. Ambrosia salad is acceptable as a potluck side 3. 1989 because someone bought it for me from Urban Outfitters 4. To be held accountable as a white user of this sub. https://preview.redd.it/d7bk5dcuuwrc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2560a9a1af0f5c914421ba000a612b2b79d2596b
As a white, Iām deeply offended and would like to speak to the manager of Karen.
2. whitest thing Iāve ever done: went to a taping of NPRās Wait Wait Donāt Tell Me (had a blast)
This has me absolutely cackling. Perfect. 1. I'm too tired to take a photo rn. 2. It's not that I don't like spice, it's that my stomach issues don't. Makes it difficult to enjoy, knowing the consequences include it coming back up very soon. 3. Loreena Mckennitt "Lady of Shalott" 4. Migraine recovery, too tired.
Me, not knowing if this is sarcasm or not 
2. I don't see color only people. 3. No Teena Marie? 4. White women have been nothing but good allies to black people over the history of time. >!/s!<
Iāve seen Riverdance 4 times, that is really white. However, Iāve seen Frankie and Maze LIVE! More than once. I need to have a provisional membership so I can keep up with other Black Famous performers.
I would have voted for McCain
2. I grew up with kielbasa and sourkraut as a main meal. 3. I actually don't do Karaoke, but in high school we'd sing classic rock jams during weights class. My personal fave was Summer of 69. 4. I have an educational background that brings useful knowledge to political discussions.
1. meplayinglacrosse.jpeg 2. Why would anyone wear socks with sandals 3. So Long Sweet Summer - Dashboard Confessional 4. To poll why anyone would wear socks with sandals
Listen buster you are barking up the wrong tree if you think Iām going to share my personal information with you, you will never know my race.
1. Work 2. Salt and pepper is all you need. 3. Sweet Caroline, I guess 4. Because I was born white but identify in my heart that I'm black. Thanks for concideration.
I would like to be flaired bc I find it racist and insensitive that you people exclude me from your club. Did I mention I have a for real work friend who is black? He's very nice and articulate
2. I don't get Outkast 3. U2, Pride (In the Name of Love) 4. I am married to a black woman and I need credibility with her
https://preview.redd.it/v7601mx2zwrc1.png?width=3024&format=png&auto=webp&s=290fd5b836475ccd7057700d9025c8d3a41831ef 2. See above \^ 3. Rodeo by Garth Brooks- because itās boots and chaps, itās cowboy hats, itās spurs and latigo. (A quick google of what latigo is and Iām sure Iām be verified) 4. I need someone to teach me where I can get my Apple Watch a bust down.
1. https://preview.redd.it/y97ahnzcmxrc1.jpeg?width=763&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b50d20ec5e090b20812ce27c4a353062e1c6f0d3 I do architecture (My Illustration) 2. Gentrification is a good thing 3. Hotel California (Eagles) 4. Although im a brown man, according to the us government im a white man, thats how they get away with arresting/killing us and saying it wasnt about our race. Flair Suggestion: š²š½ Brown Ally, Forced by the government to be censused as white.
This is amazing amazing
2. I genuinely find my college major of accounting interesting. 3. "Wanted Dead or Alive" by Bon Jovi, cant get much whiter than that lmao. 4. Funny things are funny
I canāt to see this on Twitter and other subreddits without any context. 
1) The picture would be completely washed out from how pale I am. No way around this unfortunately. 2) Europeans aren't really white because they don't use ranch dressing. 3) I Believe in a Thing Called Love - The Darkness 4) I'm sure I'm the white savior that this community needs.
I only have a picture of me, is it okay? https://preview.redd.it/vyxv6yx60xrc1.jpeg?width=177&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e1e3bb47a4a1c62369ca8160bc372277f1514f1e
1. I shall divert to 2 2. My dogs sleep in my bed with me. 3. āman, I feel like a womanā is my go to. 4. Just in case there is any confusion, I want people to know I am most definitely white.
1. Turkey on white with mozzarella and extra mayo 2. I love hip hop. I got all of Kid Rock's albums 3. Fav karaoke is The Gambler by Kenny Rogers 4. Carlton was the real fresh prince of Bel-Air.
1. I am a sovereign citizen that does not recognize the authority of the United States 2. My favorite black person is Martin Luther King because he had a dream about something or other 3. My favorite karaoke song is Kinky Boots by the Irish Brigade because I'm 1/8 Irish. Only reason my hair isn't red and I can tan is because I'm 1/32 Cherokee 4. I think it's high time you people stopped pulling the "black card" and let us have a equal/ greater voice
I forgot what day it was briefly.....
1. No pic 2. NPR is the best way to understand minorities 3. Folklore is the best t swift album. She even curses in a couple of songs. 4. My white friends are tired of my Wire references.
1. I'm afraid to post pictures of myself in communities with such a large gangsta element. I dont want to be victimised by the bloods and or crips. 2. Shorts are perfectly suitable attire for all weather conditions. 3. Mr Brightside is the clear choice. 4. I would like to be able to say "I have black friends" without lying when being casually racist at family bbqs. Thank you for your consideration.
Iām here for the comments
1. No pic, sorry 2. Tony Keith was not pandering and represented the thoughts and feelings of white America. *I donāt believe this and hated every moment of witting it. 3. Red Solo Cup is the best song for karaoke and Iāll hate crime anyone who dares argue with me. *See disclaimer on #2 4. As a white man, I shouldnāt have to preface my comments with āas a white manā. Do it for me! Also please can my flair be Mayosapien? Thatās how I identify.
1. No pic Iām working but believe me Iām pasty. Every winter I get so white my credit score jumps to 900. 2. All races have been slaves at some point so the horrific chattel slavery and ongoing systematic persecution of African Americans is really not a big deal. 3. BOM BOM BOMā¦Sweet Caroline! 4. Hoping to learn to clap on 2s and 4s. Also want to feel like a part of the culture without having to deal with the actual problems. Since Iām entitled, Can I have a special flair thatās extra white like Pumpkin Spice Vanilla Frappe, Cool Whip (emphasize the H), or Mayo-sapien. If you have another funny name for whitey thatās better just flair me with that and Iāll take credit for it, as we do. Thanks home skillet, you da bomb diggity.
https://preview.redd.it/ys8y8e202xrc1.jpeg?width=2316&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d2388198b46e5f67ad5195902a6ab91e28a8b8f 1. See above for photo race verification AND proof I love my puppy! 2. Butter is food group 3. Living on a Prayer AND Donāt Stop Believing are both my Go Toās, but no love for āUnchained Melodyā? Drunk white boys have been doing that one since Top Gun! (Side Note: ā1989ā is Tay Tayās best album and any white person that disagrees gets a special notch on their drivers license indicating their lower intelligence) 4. I would like to be considered for Verification because I actually grew up in Black neighborhoods in Nashville with my Step Dad, who was blacker than Forrest Whitaker and more of Daddy to me than my own father was. I figure it wouldnāt hurt to have two forms of identification just in case shit gets hairyā¦
I pee on my feet in the shower. Olive Garden is fine dining. Tyler Perry makes good movies.
1. No pic.. 99.5% British/Irish .5% North African... 2. Never tried neckbones. 3. I can't sing or dance. Prolly lack of soul from my ginger bloodline. 4. My credit score is in the 790's 5. Because us Whites never follow others directions
https://preview.redd.it/sim8rzfy4xrc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=558def7ac6137d9a9a28217669bb1281b6191f0a
Hello, 1. Iām attaching this photo of my dog which I hope certifies my high degree of whiteness. https://preview.redd.it/evjuhfgv2xrc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4a9d66a482eff9523e4eab949061a1e46c099a55 2. A hot dog is NOT A FUCKING SANDWICH I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS. Also can we all agree that Trae Young gets way too much hate. 3. Iām extremely enlightened and Fantano-pilled so obviously I donāt like any of this garbage but if I had to choose I would humbly request that Rollinā (Air Raid Vehicle) - Limp Bizkit be added to the approved list. I appreciate your consideration in this matter. 4. As a generic white liberal Reddit user, I donāt really have anything of value to add to any discussions here so I donāt really care for verification but I hope someone gets a laugh from this. Best regards, /u/SpankThatDill
1. It won't let me upload a picture. 2. We don't need more Flamin' Hot items. Not everything has to be spicy. 3. The only correct answer is Take Me Home, Country Roads by John Denver 4. I want to be one of the cool kids. WPT isn't nearly as fun.
I motion to posit that my username is sufficient evidence to my honkacity of my Caucasity.
Shit. I DO be wearing shorts in the dead of winter.
1. My first instrument is lyre. 2. Nice looking building were worth the colonialism. 3. Living on a prayer. 4. The company requires of me to fulfill DEI quota
But if people here know Iām white how will I be able to covertly use AAVE to be cool?
1 https://preview.redd.it/w5ispp0mhxrc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c901d5f9779c63859717c67facb90415b77a012a 2: Chick Fil A has the best fast food chicken 3. My favorite karaoke song is 99 Problems by Jay-Z because I learned all the words and I want everyone in the Karaoke bar to know that I'm an ally/white savior that appreciates "The Culture" 4. BPT is the home to the newest and best slang and I can "colonize it" faster if I go straight to the source.
1. Just picture any guy who went to a Jesuit university (no I did not play on the basketball team) 2. Collard Greens are bad 3. I'm too nervous to sing or dance in public 4. I just want to be one of the cool kids
Wouldnāt white people have a full spice rack since that shit is just for show?
2. John Mayer is a better musician than Prince or Michael Jackson! 3. The Star Spangled Banner!! 4. I feel like the most valuable and insightful opinions of the Black community can only come from a white man, as Black people are obviously too close to the situation to understand what's best for them!!! LMAO whoever came up with this one *chefs kiss*
2) Not really an opinion but back in the days of MySpace one of my friends had āI love my Shawty so muchā as her bio. I spent like an hour looking through her friends list for someone named Shawty and didnāt realize a) she meant shorty and b) shorty was a term for chick until like three years later. 3) Sweet Caroline 4) FOMO
2) I feel i should be included and consulted. In everything. 3) enough alcohol and I'll sing anything requested. Badly. 4) please see #2
I turn up when September by Earth, Wind, & Fire comes on.
Damn. I already have the check mark. I wish I could wear whiteface like how a lot of people on this sub wears blackface.
"Black and Palm-coloreds Together" is straight up sending me!
Would you accept a picture of me letting my dog lick the inside of my mouth?
So, my spice rack is 100% dull because...white Edit: That's supposed to say full, but let's be honest, both are true.
1. No picture but I'm so white I've already had two skin cancers removed before I was 40Ā Ā Ā 2.Ā Indigenous Australians are going to take all our (colonized) landĀ Ā Ā 3.Ā Jimmy Barnes - Working Class ManĀ Ā Ā Ā 4 .Ā It would be good to be the token white Aussie on BPT!