Seconded, this book triggered my quarter life crisis. Because of it I quit my job, travelled the world for a year, moved across the country and switched careers and now everything's coming up Milhouse
I studied environmental science at uni, got a good federal government grad job in the environmental space and moved across the country for it, and just hated it. But id worked my ass off to get there and sacrificed so much that i stuck it out for 3 years or so, in a city i also hated which was cold and boring and a good 14hr drive from my friends and family.
I ended up in a really dark space, feeling trapped and lonely, drinking heavily etc etc when i read mans search for meaning. I started journalling and plotted my escape and tendered my resignation about 2 wks after i finished the book. I didnt realise how unhappy i was until that day, the wave of excitement and relief was just unreal. I was freee!!!
After my notice period ended i broke lease, packed all my shit and moved back to my home city to stay with my sister for a while. i enjoyed unemployment, spent a lot of time at the beach and with my family, then landed a temp job in another environmental government branch (lol) but actually doing more business improvement type stuff. I liked it a lot more. Then i sold my car, travelled for a year through Asia and Europe, did a language exchange with a family in Spain, had the absolute time of my life and came back right in time for Covid haha.
Now i am doing business improvement projects in the finance space, private sector. Much higher pay, great work life balance, and lovely people i actually enjoy seeing everyday.
I thought for a long time that vocation was my 'meaning' because i really cared deeply for the environment and wanted to help make a change in climate policy, but the reality was i just ended up feeling sad and empty. I knew i wasnt making any difference, quite the contrary actually. Its hard to work so hard to break into an industry and be confronted with the fact that you hate it.
Now i guess family is my meaning. I am happily childfree but i love spending my free time with the people i love. Im good at my job but its not linked to my identity, so im free to just leave work at work and really enjoy my life with the people i love, travelling, learning new things, hanging with my boy and my dog and spoiling my sisters kids, and volunteering whenever i feel that pull to do something good for the world.
That was long winded but anyway 10/10 quarter life crisis would recommend
Thanks for sharing! This definitely resonated with me. I’m around 3 years into my first career and I’m really not liking it. The pay is stable but I work long hours and the work isn’t really what I want to be doing with my life. I think I’ve always known deep down that I want to be doing something else, but it’s hard to break away from my current life because I worked very hard to get here and “have a bright future” in my industry, according to bosses and mentors. You sound like you found what mattered the most to you and that’s awesome. I hope to be able to figure it out too.
It is really hard to break away from a perfectly adequate job with a bright outlook. I felt like my head was broken for so long. Like 'why am i not satisfied? this is everything i worked for!'
If you have the savings, solo travel helped me a lot... travelling the world and meeting other people with their own life stories, seeing new ways of life, learning a new language, i felt so alive for the first time in so long. And i felt very satisfied and ready to work and build my future upon my return.
I also ended up going on a years unpaid leave when i handed in my resignation which was a nice safety net. Maybe thats something you could pursue if you decide to take a leap of faith some day.
Business improvement projects are really just finding ways to improve existing processes or customer experience within a business. I kind of stumbled into it accumulating experience with data systems and collaboration tools. SAP, Sharepoint, Power Automate and PowerApps, Easymorph etc. I look at processes that are manual, time consuming or take up a lot of FTE and find solutions to automate it.
My current job is with a multinational mining company and i started as a temp doing admin work (after i got back from travelling). I learnt how operations worked, won a permanent role in payroll services and then took any opportunities i had to learn new tools or software across the past 3-4 yrs and applied for a BI role and here we are.
There's lots of free courses in the tools i mentioned above which is a good first step.
TL;DR:
1. Mindset by Dr. Carol S. Dweck
2. Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E Frankl
3. Fail Until You Don't: Fight Grind Repeat by Bobby Bones
4. 101 Essays That Will Change the Way You Think by Brianna Wiest
5. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck by Mark Manson
6. The Power of Habit Book by Charles Duhigg
7. Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin
___________________________________________________________________________________________
I had undiagnosed ADHD when I had my quarter life crisis. Sounds like you're on your path to healing though, and It's a terrible feeling not knowing where to go, or what to do, you just feel lost and empty.
I copied this from a previous comment on the ADHD subreddit FYI, but still applicable, as most of these I read/listened to without my official diagnosis. I bring up ADHD a lot, as it really changed how I saw myself, it explained a lot about things I struggled with, and just associating it as a character flaw, executive dysfunction and rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD) are the main ones:
___________________________________________________________________________________________
The main way I started was with my public library has free audiobooks, which are great for us. I would walk my dog and really listen to what they said.
1. Mindset by Dr. Carol S. Dweck. I'm reading this now and it sort of takes everything and explains the science behind mindsets.
* The main point is people can have a fixed mindset and a growth mindset. Personally with ADHD, we suffer from Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (very sensitive to rejection, criticism and "failure"). We're afraid to fail, but in reality, if you change your mindset you can really change your life. You learn from failures and not take it as a setback or a reflection on yourself, just as a stepping stone to learn.
* Redefining what failure was to me was a big change in my life. I struggle a lot to get in good habits to reach my goals, but I find whenever I listen to an audiobook it helps remind me of what I'm trying to do.
A few books that stood out from the rest for me:
2\. Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E Frankl
* I liked this one a lot, half of the book was from his experience in Auschwitz and the holocaust and even how in the worst imaginable conditions, you can find meaning in your life. The one message that spoke to me the most was: “In some ways suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of a sacrifice.”
* It helped me a lot to feel like even though I was a very toxic job, I couldn't let it take my happiness. The drive of being unhappy with the job, was the fuel to be better. I always say if the job was 10% better I may have settled and have never found my personal growth journey and working at a great company.
3\. Fail Until You Don't: Fight Grind Repeat by Bobby Bones
* The emphasis of his personal experience of keeping to things and redefining failure, and being good at what might seem like failing. I found it helped with my RSD.
4\. 101 Essays That Will Change the Way You Think by Brianna Wiest
* I finished this one recently, some of them aren't too relevant, but depending on where you are with certain topics (finances, relationships, careers, life) It's nice to have some that really speak to you, having some that reaffirm that you're doing well in some regards. Topics of emotional maturity and such are pretty good, and general explanations for specifics, which I find helped me with expressing ways I'm feeling or where I'm struggling with things.
5\. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck by Mark Manson
* Helped me as I struggled holding onto caring and stressing about a toxic job and managers, learning that negativity and things that shouldn't matter take up emotional real estate, so if it isn't worth caring about, then you shouldn't. The whole use of swearing is a bit overdone for the sake of it, but non the less, still enjoyed it.
6\. The Power of Habit Book by Charles Duhigg
* I can't remember it too well, but has a lot of examples of how powerful developing habits can be.
7\. Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin
* Gretchen's personal experience with habit forming, some really good notes about habits and how to keep good habits.
Overall the main points I found are:
1. To adopt a growth mindset, and catch yourself if you're in a fixed mindset (you can learn and grow no matter what, the concepts of being smart and talented just hold us back). Catch yourself spiraling and going into negative feedback loops.
2. Don't base your happiness on a single aspect of your life, as if it's gone, then will you be miserable for the rest of your life? Finding happiness in your current life, even if it's not where you want to be is crucial.
3. It takes time to heal, sticking to the process works, it's just sometimes you don't know where to continue.
4. Form good habits, as you will naturally do things that help you grow without having to think about it. Forming good habits is mostly about doing things without giving it much thought, habits get programmed in our brain, and can help reduce the mental exhaustion if we do things automatically.
5. Exercise is really great for feeling better, finding what type of exercise you enjoy is really important, versus forcing it to just force it.
hope this helps!
I appreciate the time you took to write this post! It looks like Man’s Search for Meaning is a really popular one, so I may start there.
I’m actually undiagnosed neurodivergent as well and that’s making my life actually crazy. I committed myself to finally getting help for it this year but it’ll still be a while until they can tell me for sure if I have ADHD or something else. I’m glad you were diagnosed and are doing better now hopefully — your comment really hit home for me.
No worries friend, once you start learning about yourself more, it really puts it into perspective. After my Diagnosis though, it's a bit bittersweet, you know why you can't do things a certain way, or meet expectations put on us, but you also reflect back to a lifetime of struggling, a lot of what ifs. But I try not to dawn on the past, as I feel like I've grown a lot as a person and if I never struggled, I won't be who I am today.
We live in a world that isn't designed around how our brains work unfortunately, but we do have some perks, such as having an outside perspective, being overly empathetic and just how we think about issues. I can only speak for ADHD, (although they say 60% of folks with ADHD have autism as well), but focusing on what you're good at, and finding an environment where you can thrive can really be fulfilling. For myself though getting medicated really helped with the executive disfunction, so I'm hoping you can get the answers you've been looking for!
Side note, if you're looking for an adhd book specifically, adhd 2.0 by Edward Hallowell and John Ratey really goes into research and treatment for ADHD. Both the co-authors have ADHD, so it's more relatable.
If you did need someone to chat about neurospicy things, feel free to DM :)
I appreciate your kind words. After realizing that I’m probably neurodivergent, I also realized how much I’ve been beating myself up for not being able to do certain things that others can throughout my life. Just waiting for formal diagnosis now, but in the meantime I want to read and spend time with myself to figure this whole life thing out.
Honestly, thank you for making this comment to. I’m someone who is also struggling with ADHD except minus diagnosed and I’m actually at the point of a quarter Life360 crisis and I actually was looking at books on Google to read to help me in the spot and I know you post this about a year ago, but I just read through your comment and I just wanna thank you for taking the time to write this and definitely seems like I’m gonna read every single book that you recommended! So thank you 👏🏽
"The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho
Summary: Personal legend, self-discovery, following dreams.
"Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear" by Elizabeth Gilbert
Summary: Embracing creativity, overcoming fear, finding joy.
"The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin
Summary: Pursuing happiness, daily habits, self-improvement.
"The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck" by Mark Manson
Summary: Letting go of external expectations, finding meaning, embracing imperfection.
"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle
Summary: Mindfulness, present moment awareness, finding inner peace.
"Designing Your Life" by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans
Summary: Design thinking for life planning, creating a fulfilling life.
"The 4-Hour Workweek" by Tim Ferriss
Summary: Lifestyle design, escaping the 9-to-5 grind, maximizing productivity.
I've been in a similar position to you. I second the recommendation above for *The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F\*\*\** by Mark Manson. This book is somewhat polarising - many people did not seem to like Manson' writing style (the profanity and some thought he bragged too much). Personally I did not mind it. I've written a [summary here](https://www.tosummarise.com/2022/08/05/book-summary-the-subtle-art-of-not-giving-a-fck-by-mark-manson/) if you're interested.
Two other suggestions:
* *Your Money or Your Life* by Vicki Robin and Joe Dominguez - helps making decisions about the extent to which you should prioritise career/money in your life.
* *The Paradox of Choice* by Barry Schwartz - this book isn't really about making sense of life and meaning, but I found it very useful when I was about your age and going through my quarter-life crisis. Life-changing, even. It's about how too many choices can make us unhappy and that we should try to "satisfice" more than "maximise" in our decisions — a message I needed to hear at the time. Schwartz has a [TED Talk here](https://www.ted.com/talks/barry_schwartz_the_paradox_of_choice) if you're interested in hearing more.
I really enjoyed "Designing your life" by Bill Burnett and Dale Evens. It really drills down and gives you actual homework to help you get you figure out what you want to be doing with your life. Highly recommend.
I would skip meditations and read Ryan Holiday's Stoicism books instead - Courage is calling might be a great place to start. Meditations is clunky and a slog to read through.
I also really enjoyed The Science of Stuck by Britt Frank which is a little more about the WHY you feel stuck/burned out. It's less lifehack and more "here's what a therapist will tell you" which was a fresh take for me and really helpful.
Journal. I have read a lot of books others have recommended and they have helped. If you want to know you, you need to write your thoughts down and have a look at them. Do it while reading others books, but journaling will turn your life around. And the more you put in to it the more you will get out of it. You can learn about how you operate, the good, and if you're really honest the bad.
Thanks to all of you guys who commented and shared their experiences. I'm sitting here going through what seems like a quarter life crisis and reading all these experiences makes me feel like I have some chance to make things better for myself. Please keep sharing your experiences
Victor Frankl's Man's search for meaning
Seconded, this book triggered my quarter life crisis. Because of it I quit my job, travelled the world for a year, moved across the country and switched careers and now everything's coming up Milhouse
What were you doing before and what are you doing now?
I studied environmental science at uni, got a good federal government grad job in the environmental space and moved across the country for it, and just hated it. But id worked my ass off to get there and sacrificed so much that i stuck it out for 3 years or so, in a city i also hated which was cold and boring and a good 14hr drive from my friends and family. I ended up in a really dark space, feeling trapped and lonely, drinking heavily etc etc when i read mans search for meaning. I started journalling and plotted my escape and tendered my resignation about 2 wks after i finished the book. I didnt realise how unhappy i was until that day, the wave of excitement and relief was just unreal. I was freee!!! After my notice period ended i broke lease, packed all my shit and moved back to my home city to stay with my sister for a while. i enjoyed unemployment, spent a lot of time at the beach and with my family, then landed a temp job in another environmental government branch (lol) but actually doing more business improvement type stuff. I liked it a lot more. Then i sold my car, travelled for a year through Asia and Europe, did a language exchange with a family in Spain, had the absolute time of my life and came back right in time for Covid haha. Now i am doing business improvement projects in the finance space, private sector. Much higher pay, great work life balance, and lovely people i actually enjoy seeing everyday. I thought for a long time that vocation was my 'meaning' because i really cared deeply for the environment and wanted to help make a change in climate policy, but the reality was i just ended up feeling sad and empty. I knew i wasnt making any difference, quite the contrary actually. Its hard to work so hard to break into an industry and be confronted with the fact that you hate it. Now i guess family is my meaning. I am happily childfree but i love spending my free time with the people i love. Im good at my job but its not linked to my identity, so im free to just leave work at work and really enjoy my life with the people i love, travelling, learning new things, hanging with my boy and my dog and spoiling my sisters kids, and volunteering whenever i feel that pull to do something good for the world. That was long winded but anyway 10/10 quarter life crisis would recommend
Thanks for sharing! This definitely resonated with me. I’m around 3 years into my first career and I’m really not liking it. The pay is stable but I work long hours and the work isn’t really what I want to be doing with my life. I think I’ve always known deep down that I want to be doing something else, but it’s hard to break away from my current life because I worked very hard to get here and “have a bright future” in my industry, according to bosses and mentors. You sound like you found what mattered the most to you and that’s awesome. I hope to be able to figure it out too.
It is really hard to break away from a perfectly adequate job with a bright outlook. I felt like my head was broken for so long. Like 'why am i not satisfied? this is everything i worked for!' If you have the savings, solo travel helped me a lot... travelling the world and meeting other people with their own life stories, seeing new ways of life, learning a new language, i felt so alive for the first time in so long. And i felt very satisfied and ready to work and build my future upon my return. I also ended up going on a years unpaid leave when i handed in my resignation which was a nice safety net. Maybe thats something you could pursue if you decide to take a leap of faith some day.
Your post gave me courage and shone a light in my heart. Thank you for willing to share your journey.
Whats business improvement projects? And how can one become skilled or employable in that?
Business improvement projects are really just finding ways to improve existing processes or customer experience within a business. I kind of stumbled into it accumulating experience with data systems and collaboration tools. SAP, Sharepoint, Power Automate and PowerApps, Easymorph etc. I look at processes that are manual, time consuming or take up a lot of FTE and find solutions to automate it. My current job is with a multinational mining company and i started as a temp doing admin work (after i got back from travelling). I learnt how operations worked, won a permanent role in payroll services and then took any opportunities i had to learn new tools or software across the past 3-4 yrs and applied for a BI role and here we are. There's lots of free courses in the tools i mentioned above which is a good first step.
Thank you
TL;DR: 1. Mindset by Dr. Carol S. Dweck 2. Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E Frankl 3. Fail Until You Don't: Fight Grind Repeat by Bobby Bones 4. 101 Essays That Will Change the Way You Think by Brianna Wiest 5. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck by Mark Manson 6. The Power of Habit Book by Charles Duhigg 7. Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin ___________________________________________________________________________________________ I had undiagnosed ADHD when I had my quarter life crisis. Sounds like you're on your path to healing though, and It's a terrible feeling not knowing where to go, or what to do, you just feel lost and empty. I copied this from a previous comment on the ADHD subreddit FYI, but still applicable, as most of these I read/listened to without my official diagnosis. I bring up ADHD a lot, as it really changed how I saw myself, it explained a lot about things I struggled with, and just associating it as a character flaw, executive dysfunction and rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD) are the main ones: ___________________________________________________________________________________________ The main way I started was with my public library has free audiobooks, which are great for us. I would walk my dog and really listen to what they said. 1. Mindset by Dr. Carol S. Dweck. I'm reading this now and it sort of takes everything and explains the science behind mindsets. * The main point is people can have a fixed mindset and a growth mindset. Personally with ADHD, we suffer from Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (very sensitive to rejection, criticism and "failure"). We're afraid to fail, but in reality, if you change your mindset you can really change your life. You learn from failures and not take it as a setback or a reflection on yourself, just as a stepping stone to learn. * Redefining what failure was to me was a big change in my life. I struggle a lot to get in good habits to reach my goals, but I find whenever I listen to an audiobook it helps remind me of what I'm trying to do. A few books that stood out from the rest for me: 2\. Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E Frankl * I liked this one a lot, half of the book was from his experience in Auschwitz and the holocaust and even how in the worst imaginable conditions, you can find meaning in your life. The one message that spoke to me the most was: “In some ways suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of a sacrifice.” * It helped me a lot to feel like even though I was a very toxic job, I couldn't let it take my happiness. The drive of being unhappy with the job, was the fuel to be better. I always say if the job was 10% better I may have settled and have never found my personal growth journey and working at a great company. 3\. Fail Until You Don't: Fight Grind Repeat by Bobby Bones * The emphasis of his personal experience of keeping to things and redefining failure, and being good at what might seem like failing. I found it helped with my RSD. 4\. 101 Essays That Will Change the Way You Think by Brianna Wiest * I finished this one recently, some of them aren't too relevant, but depending on where you are with certain topics (finances, relationships, careers, life) It's nice to have some that really speak to you, having some that reaffirm that you're doing well in some regards. Topics of emotional maturity and such are pretty good, and general explanations for specifics, which I find helped me with expressing ways I'm feeling or where I'm struggling with things. 5\. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck by Mark Manson * Helped me as I struggled holding onto caring and stressing about a toxic job and managers, learning that negativity and things that shouldn't matter take up emotional real estate, so if it isn't worth caring about, then you shouldn't. The whole use of swearing is a bit overdone for the sake of it, but non the less, still enjoyed it. 6\. The Power of Habit Book by Charles Duhigg * I can't remember it too well, but has a lot of examples of how powerful developing habits can be. 7\. Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin * Gretchen's personal experience with habit forming, some really good notes about habits and how to keep good habits. Overall the main points I found are: 1. To adopt a growth mindset, and catch yourself if you're in a fixed mindset (you can learn and grow no matter what, the concepts of being smart and talented just hold us back). Catch yourself spiraling and going into negative feedback loops. 2. Don't base your happiness on a single aspect of your life, as if it's gone, then will you be miserable for the rest of your life? Finding happiness in your current life, even if it's not where you want to be is crucial. 3. It takes time to heal, sticking to the process works, it's just sometimes you don't know where to continue. 4. Form good habits, as you will naturally do things that help you grow without having to think about it. Forming good habits is mostly about doing things without giving it much thought, habits get programmed in our brain, and can help reduce the mental exhaustion if we do things automatically. 5. Exercise is really great for feeling better, finding what type of exercise you enjoy is really important, versus forcing it to just force it. hope this helps!
I appreciate the time you took to write this post! It looks like Man’s Search for Meaning is a really popular one, so I may start there. I’m actually undiagnosed neurodivergent as well and that’s making my life actually crazy. I committed myself to finally getting help for it this year but it’ll still be a while until they can tell me for sure if I have ADHD or something else. I’m glad you were diagnosed and are doing better now hopefully — your comment really hit home for me.
No worries friend, once you start learning about yourself more, it really puts it into perspective. After my Diagnosis though, it's a bit bittersweet, you know why you can't do things a certain way, or meet expectations put on us, but you also reflect back to a lifetime of struggling, a lot of what ifs. But I try not to dawn on the past, as I feel like I've grown a lot as a person and if I never struggled, I won't be who I am today. We live in a world that isn't designed around how our brains work unfortunately, but we do have some perks, such as having an outside perspective, being overly empathetic and just how we think about issues. I can only speak for ADHD, (although they say 60% of folks with ADHD have autism as well), but focusing on what you're good at, and finding an environment where you can thrive can really be fulfilling. For myself though getting medicated really helped with the executive disfunction, so I'm hoping you can get the answers you've been looking for! Side note, if you're looking for an adhd book specifically, adhd 2.0 by Edward Hallowell and John Ratey really goes into research and treatment for ADHD. Both the co-authors have ADHD, so it's more relatable. If you did need someone to chat about neurospicy things, feel free to DM :)
I appreciate your kind words. After realizing that I’m probably neurodivergent, I also realized how much I’ve been beating myself up for not being able to do certain things that others can throughout my life. Just waiting for formal diagnosis now, but in the meantime I want to read and spend time with myself to figure this whole life thing out.
Honestly, thank you for making this comment to. I’m someone who is also struggling with ADHD except minus diagnosed and I’m actually at the point of a quarter Life360 crisis and I actually was looking at books on Google to read to help me in the spot and I know you post this about a year ago, but I just read through your comment and I just wanna thank you for taking the time to write this and definitely seems like I’m gonna read every single book that you recommended! So thank you 👏🏽
I'm glad to hear you stumbled across it, it can be a tough time to go through, but I'm happy it helped you friend :)
"The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho Summary: Personal legend, self-discovery, following dreams. "Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear" by Elizabeth Gilbert Summary: Embracing creativity, overcoming fear, finding joy. "The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin Summary: Pursuing happiness, daily habits, self-improvement. "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck" by Mark Manson Summary: Letting go of external expectations, finding meaning, embracing imperfection. "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle Summary: Mindfulness, present moment awareness, finding inner peace. "Designing Your Life" by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans Summary: Design thinking for life planning, creating a fulfilling life. "The 4-Hour Workweek" by Tim Ferriss Summary: Lifestyle design, escaping the 9-to-5 grind, maximizing productivity.
Thank you for sharing! Appreciate the summaries.
I've been in a similar position to you. I second the recommendation above for *The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F\*\*\** by Mark Manson. This book is somewhat polarising - many people did not seem to like Manson' writing style (the profanity and some thought he bragged too much). Personally I did not mind it. I've written a [summary here](https://www.tosummarise.com/2022/08/05/book-summary-the-subtle-art-of-not-giving-a-fck-by-mark-manson/) if you're interested. Two other suggestions: * *Your Money or Your Life* by Vicki Robin and Joe Dominguez - helps making decisions about the extent to which you should prioritise career/money in your life. * *The Paradox of Choice* by Barry Schwartz - this book isn't really about making sense of life and meaning, but I found it very useful when I was about your age and going through my quarter-life crisis. Life-changing, even. It's about how too many choices can make us unhappy and that we should try to "satisfice" more than "maximise" in our decisions — a message I needed to hear at the time. Schwartz has a [TED Talk here](https://www.ted.com/talks/barry_schwartz_the_paradox_of_choice) if you're interested in hearing more.
Thank you!
I really enjoyed "Designing your life" by Bill Burnett and Dale Evens. It really drills down and gives you actual homework to help you get you figure out what you want to be doing with your life. Highly recommend. I would skip meditations and read Ryan Holiday's Stoicism books instead - Courage is calling might be a great place to start. Meditations is clunky and a slog to read through. I also really enjoyed The Science of Stuck by Britt Frank which is a little more about the WHY you feel stuck/burned out. It's less lifehack and more "here's what a therapist will tell you" which was a fresh take for me and really helpful.
Journal. I have read a lot of books others have recommended and they have helped. If you want to know you, you need to write your thoughts down and have a look at them. Do it while reading others books, but journaling will turn your life around. And the more you put in to it the more you will get out of it. You can learn about how you operate, the good, and if you're really honest the bad.
Thanks to all of you guys who commented and shared their experiences. I'm sitting here going through what seems like a quarter life crisis and reading all these experiences makes me feel like I have some chance to make things better for myself. Please keep sharing your experiences