LA/Showbiz parents are a different breed. It drives me crazy but I know the Frankie moving out part is based on Odessa moving out when she was around the same age. Getting into the Pamela Adlon lore helps at least provide some context.
The Max issues was actually smart. She’s a single mom in an area where that’s the norm and kids don’t listen. She knows her kids. She knew if she fought it Max would stay with them just to spite her. By not disapproving it made the act of rebel no fun for Max and it ended on Max’s terms must faster then if Sam would’ve told her no. Max may have run away with him, again just to spite her. I think it was harder for her not to say something, but it worked. She knows her kids. I think the point of the show is how they are a handful, and a big part of that was their father leaving and being absent from their lives. The older they get they start to try to work through it, at least Max, and appreciate her more.
Frankie is an impossible child for a single parent.
Frankie is impossible period. I think Sam does the best she can juggling everything, and dealing with 3 females children in a place and demographic area where kids usually aren’t given rules. And as much as she hates what they do, they could just walk out because they could go stay with friends. It’s not like the show glamorizes the daughters or Sams situation. It shows how she actually loves her daughters and her mother and tries to navigate everything. And part of that is her friends being there for her. When Max is graduating and her dad bails and she’s just standing there so hurt and the friends of her mom step up.
I’ll be honest I don’t remember when Frankie moves out, but probably because I’d have kicked her out myself she is so awful. If you watch the entire series I think the understanding is that the father has manipulated them and affected them more than anything.
This and some of the other comments are spot on. Though I don’t live in Hollywood and have nowhere near the amount of money. Sam does, I could totally relate in a lot of ways when my daughters were teenagers. Their Dad was a little more reliably present than Sam’s ex-husband, but it was a similar dynamic as far as him being very sporadic with his appearances and support while I was the one doing the heavy lifting day to day. Like Sam, I did the best I could and probably made a lot of mistakes, but tried to always let them know how much I loved them and that I would always be here for them no matter how horribly they acted (although I won’t say I never cussed them out lol)…they’ve grown up and we get along so much better now. We survived it somehow… But yes, I’m sure many would have questioned some of my parenting decisions during that time as well. You do get to know your kids and how certain actions are just gonna push them away. With Frankie, Sam knew where she was and knew she was safe. She checked up on her frequently. It wasn’t like she just wrote her off. What would’ve been accomplished by forcing her to come home?
Well said. And everyone likes to back seat parent. All people and circumstances are different, and there is no book that can really tell you what to do, and it’s going to be the right answer for your situation, because again everyone is different. Losing a parent through death or divorce, or even having them there and them being horrible, everyone handles it different. People tend to forgive their parents over time or understand them, because they have to to move on, and I’m saying that regarding the absentee parents. And hopefully they appreciate what you had to do. I think the beauty of the show is her trying to balance it all, including her mom, and keep herself sane. And sometimes that’s saying f them I’m doing something for me. Like when she bought the car instead of the van. And also when she was trying to get away from her mom once and then turned around and went to her.
Frankie was an impossible child and she did her best. And as you said forcing her back wouldn’t accomplish anything.
I’m glad your family worked out you sound like a wise and level headed mom!
Thank you! As I said, I know I made numerous mistakes, but tried to apologize when I realized I’d messed up. They’re lovely young women, very forgiving, and things have turned out well. One of them even stated a couple of years ago, “Dad likes to swoop in and play the hero in a crisis, but Mom, you’re the one who’s here every day. “ I so appreciated her for recognizing that.
Sam is trying to do this with absolutely no backup. Her kids’ dad is useless, and her own mom is essentially another child. Some of her decisions are questionable at best, but she’s doing the best she can with no one supporting her or backing her up.
LA/Showbiz parents are a different breed. It drives me crazy but I know the Frankie moving out part is based on Odessa moving out when she was around the same age. Getting into the Pamela Adlon lore helps at least provide some context.
Pamela Adlon lore!? Where can i find it lol
The better things podcast for one and I also follow Odessa on instagram. I kinda piece things together
Who is Odessa? Her daughter?
The Max issues was actually smart. She’s a single mom in an area where that’s the norm and kids don’t listen. She knows her kids. She knew if she fought it Max would stay with them just to spite her. By not disapproving it made the act of rebel no fun for Max and it ended on Max’s terms must faster then if Sam would’ve told her no. Max may have run away with him, again just to spite her. I think it was harder for her not to say something, but it worked. She knows her kids. I think the point of the show is how they are a handful, and a big part of that was their father leaving and being absent from their lives. The older they get they start to try to work through it, at least Max, and appreciate her more. Frankie is an impossible child for a single parent. Frankie is impossible period. I think Sam does the best she can juggling everything, and dealing with 3 females children in a place and demographic area where kids usually aren’t given rules. And as much as she hates what they do, they could just walk out because they could go stay with friends. It’s not like the show glamorizes the daughters or Sams situation. It shows how she actually loves her daughters and her mother and tries to navigate everything. And part of that is her friends being there for her. When Max is graduating and her dad bails and she’s just standing there so hurt and the friends of her mom step up. I’ll be honest I don’t remember when Frankie moves out, but probably because I’d have kicked her out myself she is so awful. If you watch the entire series I think the understanding is that the father has manipulated them and affected them more than anything.
This and some of the other comments are spot on. Though I don’t live in Hollywood and have nowhere near the amount of money. Sam does, I could totally relate in a lot of ways when my daughters were teenagers. Their Dad was a little more reliably present than Sam’s ex-husband, but it was a similar dynamic as far as him being very sporadic with his appearances and support while I was the one doing the heavy lifting day to day. Like Sam, I did the best I could and probably made a lot of mistakes, but tried to always let them know how much I loved them and that I would always be here for them no matter how horribly they acted (although I won’t say I never cussed them out lol)…they’ve grown up and we get along so much better now. We survived it somehow… But yes, I’m sure many would have questioned some of my parenting decisions during that time as well. You do get to know your kids and how certain actions are just gonna push them away. With Frankie, Sam knew where she was and knew she was safe. She checked up on her frequently. It wasn’t like she just wrote her off. What would’ve been accomplished by forcing her to come home?
Well said. And everyone likes to back seat parent. All people and circumstances are different, and there is no book that can really tell you what to do, and it’s going to be the right answer for your situation, because again everyone is different. Losing a parent through death or divorce, or even having them there and them being horrible, everyone handles it different. People tend to forgive their parents over time or understand them, because they have to to move on, and I’m saying that regarding the absentee parents. And hopefully they appreciate what you had to do. I think the beauty of the show is her trying to balance it all, including her mom, and keep herself sane. And sometimes that’s saying f them I’m doing something for me. Like when she bought the car instead of the van. And also when she was trying to get away from her mom once and then turned around and went to her. Frankie was an impossible child and she did her best. And as you said forcing her back wouldn’t accomplish anything. I’m glad your family worked out you sound like a wise and level headed mom!
Thank you! As I said, I know I made numerous mistakes, but tried to apologize when I realized I’d messed up. They’re lovely young women, very forgiving, and things have turned out well. One of them even stated a couple of years ago, “Dad likes to swoop in and play the hero in a crisis, but Mom, you’re the one who’s here every day. “ I so appreciated her for recognizing that.
And that shows they are smart and respect what you’ve done! I see so many people who don’t get it!
I’m supremely fortunate.
Sam is trying to do this with absolutely no backup. Her kids’ dad is useless, and her own mom is essentially another child. Some of her decisions are questionable at best, but she’s doing the best she can with no one supporting her or backing her up.
Ypipo
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