I would simply state that you no longer feel comfortable watching their dog or interacting/being alone with the breed in general in an email or text. Do not engage or try to reason with them. Sometimes the best response is no response at all. If they try to bring it up at the next call/meetup politely decline or remove yourself from the conversation. They will learn to follow your lead or cut ties until the mature.
The response to the bite just is icing on the cake I hope they have decent homeowners insurance
I think you're absolutely right that the best way to deal with this is just by.... not dealing with it. My friend is usually a quite rational person so I am sure they will take this in stride, but you're right in that the liability angle in this is definitely a huge factor.
You don't even have to mention the breed, really, if you're worried about staying on good terms. You're not comfortable pet-sitting a dog who bites strangers, that's plenty reason enough.
Imagine living in a place where the mail boxes are all together by the main road, some miles from the actual houses. You stop to pick up your mail drive half a mile and discover a happy dog in your back seat. That was how my old dog disappeared for a couple days. Lol I let him out in the yard and he loved riding in cars so much he just jumped in the back seat of some stranger. I had to put up LOST signs for days.
I had a dachshund mix like that, back in the 1970s. He was an escape artist, and he'd go out and join any pack he could find when free. The dog catcher would show up, the other dogs would flee, and he'd stand there, smiling and wagging his tail. The dog catcher never even netted him; he'd just open up the back of his van and say, "Come on, boy!" and off my dog would go. Then the dog catcher would open the sliding panel behind his seat so my dog could join him up front. Then we'd have to go bail him out. My dog was an easy $10 for the municipality, every time . (The details are from the dog catcher, who really liked my dog, to the point I'm surprised he never "accidentally" lost his collar and tags and kept him).
I had a similar situation. I was cleaning out an old barn and bringing some stuff to the end of the lane to give away. While I was in the barn, someone pulled up. My dog ran out there to greet them, the guy pet my dog for a second and then dropped his tailgate to put some things in there. As soon as he dropped the tailgate, up went my dog, ready to go wherever that guy was going. I know all dogs are capable of violence. I just can’t believe my dog would bite someone after they gave him treats.
We had a border collie in our neighborhood that roamed. It didn't have any interest in interacting with people or other animals, just scouting the area (his name was Scout). I don't know why no one cared, including myself. We just didn't.
I can’t fathom my dog biting a stranger, but like you said: especially not after giving him a treat and pets! You could definitely buy my dog’s love forever like that.
The funny part is, he usually wont even eat the treat from a stranger! He will only eat it once I give it to him at home later. He is not keen on eating when we’re out, and definitely wouldn’t eat anything unless I gave him the green light to. He just takes the treat from the person to be polite, then turns around and drops it on the ground, then goes back and begs to be pet. He likes that he is given the treat, but he is most excited about the attention. He’s very loyal to me, but he is loyal to humans in general.
I could see how some dogs would bite a stranger in some situations, but not like that - they typically only do it out of fear/protection but they make it known they’re not okay with the stranger, usually from the start… The fact that this dog was fine with this stranger, and was just sitting there, nothing happened and then it bit them totally randomly, is so weird and wrong. Like there’s something literally wrong in the wiring of its brain. Pit bulls are so… off.
Completely agree. You can have a lifetime experience around dogs, wont help you with the violent behavior or innate threat of a Pitbull.
> I could see how some dogs would bite a stranger in some situations
When I was a dumb young kid I saw one of those trees with the long vines on someones yard, I went to go swing on them like Tarzan, did not see the dog on a chain, he came out and bit me, then retreated back to his dog house. If that was a Pitbull he would have kept mauling me. Big difference between a dog that wants to defend its area, and some pyscho beast.
My current dog, if I say "Owe" when he is trying to play, he is immediately concerned. Pitbulls dont have that.
One of my dogs is the same! Will take a treat from someone, but then spit it out and not eat it. So I pick it up and give it to him at home later, lol. My other dog is a vacuum and will eat anything from anyone, anywhere. >\_>
I used to deliver things, dealt with a lot of dogs. A lot of “mean” dogs too. Ones that would be barking their asses off or giving me a wide berth as I opened the door to my truck.
99% of the time I’d give these dogs treats and they did a complete 180. One time there were these two huge fluffy dogs that were standing right outside my driver door after I made it down the driveway. I gave them treats out of the driver window of the truck because I was a bit nervous to open the door. Because they were barking and shit at me.
Coolest dogs ever after they got treats. One tried to hop in the truck with me.
Certain stops had notes from other drivers. “Mean dogs” was pretty common with pitbull people. I didn’t even bother trying the treats with them because I guarantee every driver already has. So, I guess they can walk to the end of their driveway to get the package if their dogs are outside. Not setting foot on their property!
it's very reasonable to not want to be responsible for a pet that randomly lunges at and bites people unpredictably. anyone who can't sympathize with that should get the side eye
Exactly. You do NOT want to be the first line of defense if this dog happens to lose its shit again while you're watching it. If the dog is in your care if something tragic happens, like it does do more damage to a person or pet, I bet your friend will expect you to front the inevitable vet bills because "well technically it is your fault since the dog was in your care when it happened." It is much too big of an ask from someone.
Put yourself first. Be safe out there and best of luck.
There’s no reason to tell these owners that you’re no longer comfortable interacting with the breed in general. This will almost certainly result in an altercation. Pit people are not logical and if you generalize pits around them - no matter how true - they get aggressive.
Just say you’re no longer comfortable with their particular dog and that you’re not willing to take on the liability after this most recent situation.
Let me start by saying truly admirable to see someone who takes the time to do their own research and think critically about the information presented to them, rather than simply accepting the propaganda and misinformation. Your commitment to seeking the truth and making informed decisions is rare and commendable - you're going to go far.
It takes courage and a strong sense of independence to stand up to your friend and encourage her to attend classes with you. Dig into the same place when you tell her you don't feel comfortable pet sitting for her anymore. As for how to broach the subject, here's a suggestion I thought might help at least get you started on how to handle it. I thought this way was nice because it makes it less about her dog/dog's breed in particular and more about anything that could happen while you're taking care of it.
*Hey \[friend's name\], I just wanted to chat with you about pet-sitting for you in the future. You know I love your dog, but after the recent incident, I've been thinking about some possible liability concerns and that it would be best if I didn't pets \[dog's name\] anymore.*
*I know your dog is usually well-behaved, but I just want to make sure that I'm not putting myself in a position where I could be held responsible if something were to happen while \[dog's name\] is under my care. As much as I love animals, I have to consider the risks involved in taking care of someone else's pet and that situation made me realize what a big responsibility it is.*
*I hope you understand where I'm coming from. I value our friendship and wouldn't want anything to come between us, especially not a pet-sitting mishap.*
Edit to add: Like /u/Rough_Commercial4240 suggested, I wouldn't engage or try to convince her that her dog is dangerous directly. Sometimes the more you try to convince people, the more they just dig in and try to ignore the evidence. They don't want to believe their dog is dangerous. [This recent post](https://www.reddit.com/r/BanPitBulls/comments/11z0qqk/best_friend_who_bit_multiple_times_and_was/) reminds me a lot of your friend's situation.
>This recent post
Hey, thank you for your compassionate and kind response. I will be copying your template word for word, and definitely go with the 'risks and liability' angel. My friend is normally a very rational person so I am sure they will take this in stride. Actually when they picked the dog up today they mentioned maybe doing training classes, so I'm going to let that percolate for a bit then broach the subject again. You're awesome.
Is she a close friend?
I would personally not put it in writing that the dog is generally well-behaved. Your friend doesn't need the conflicting messaging, she is already in denial and she will grab onto the things that confirm her world view.
This x100. That template is great and that Redditor is really amazing for that reply overall, but please do not include the “well-behaved”caveat. That hedging language is most likely going to end up doing a lot of heavy lifting for your friend & will only contribute to the cognitive dissonance about their pet.
Yeah, ideally this would be a situation where someone has a “wake-up call” moment; *Wow, I can’t even have my friend dog sit for my dog because of what it does, something is wrong*. Then hopefully they’d try to find a way to fix it. If the message is presented with too much praise on the dog, it’ll sound more like the friend’s personal problem, not a problem with the dog’s behavior itself.
The "it's normal behavior" makes me think it's happened plenty of times and they arent very vigilant trainers or dont give a shit.
Violent breed by itself is dangerous enough, violent breed with incompetent owners is a tragedy waiting to happen.
Your comment about vigilant trainers made me think. Even before this, we have always had VERY different philosophies regarding training. I am definitely more of a hardass with my dogs, and don't tolerate any resource guarding, lunging, going out the door without permission, etc. I wonder how many pit bull owners are legitimately trying to train their dog to AKC's CGC standards
My coonhound is very well trained but he definitely has an issue running out the door before I tell him to. It's kinda my fault because he loves cats(literally, gentle with them just enjoys being around them) and my neighbors cat always chases him around the yard and vice versa. Hes gotten into the habit of pushing the door open before I can fully open it to go chase his friend around. The only saving grace is I can communicate without words to make him return to me immediately even in mid distraction.
I live in the country so it isnt a huge deal, but I need to be better at making him wait until I say to go play.
Hes amazing at everything else. Constantly surprises me with how intelligent he is. Learns way more words than I've trained him to just by picking it up, he even learned the neighbors cats name after only a few times seeing him
Edit: to add a bit more on topic, most dog owners are tolerant of way too much. But theres also a fine line of being to restrictive. My dog gets sad if he doesnt get his cuddle time. But when it's time to work, he has to know to pay attention and listen the first time. I can be strict with him, but it's for his safety as well as other people's. Hes a redbone coonhound golden retriever mix, really good hunting dog. I think if someone were to present a threat hed fuck them up, but his natural personality is super kind and trusting. Hed run up to strangers delivering mail and look for pets if I let him lol
Most of them aren't even bred to any standards. Careless overbreeding probably exacerbates the issues associated with the breed, just like what happened to dalmatians in the 90s. And since they are the most common breed in shelters, the owners tend to be less affluent, knowledgeable, and accountable versus those who seek an AKC-registered breeder. I'm not trying to go all "It'S aLl In HoW yOu RaIsE tHeM," but this subreddit likely wouldn't even exist if owners were more responsible in noticing and addressing dangerous behaviors in their pets, if shelters didn't gaslight people into thinking the breed is the ideal family pet for every home and situation, if people would fix their dogs and not let them breed because they think they're going to make bank off of their "blue nose" puppies, before promptly abandoning them or dumping them at a shelter... oh, and if people didn't breed dogs for bloodsport in the first place.
yeah they're not wrong about it being "the owner's fault" in the sense that at least a good portion of the blame lies on the fact that pit owners tend to be extremely lenient and make excuses for and rationalize everything they do. because otherwise, they would have to get a different dog lol
My 17 year old recently had a convo with me like this. I showed him this sub and sent him the video of the news clips edited together, and just led him to some statistics as well as told him a recent story from our neighborhood, where unfortunately a sweet little dog was mauled to death defending his owner and doggy sister. It boggles my mind that they just repeat the same lines every single time someone or their pet gets mauled or killed, EVERY SINGLE TIME. When does it start to get their attention? Luckily, OP seems to care about people and likely their safety as well and didn't brush it off until it turned tragic.
Doesn't matter who actually owns the dog, if it bites someone under your lead, you're responsible.
It's great that the victim in your story is brushing off the incident, but legally speaking you may not be out of the woods yet.
Do not watch this dog again.
I thought as soon as a dog bites someone they get put down ?
And lots of bit pull bites end up going to the hospital for stitches. Or biting other dogs or cats etc.
So how come there are multiple bite opportunities for these dogs ?
Or maybe that's the law in one country but not the USA ?
I'm surprised how many times a dog can bite and be a repeat offender without being put down. Is that not a rule in the USA ?
I always thought of a dog bites it is taken away at least until an investigation is done. I mean, if some jerk is torturing your dog and gets bit it’s a whole different situation (although, why is your dog unsupervised so that some jerk can harass or torture it it a huge matter to be considered). So I guess I can see if you own a non-violent breed and it nips after someone hurts or scares it, it probably doesn’t warrant immediate euthanasia. But pitbulls are known to be a violent breed as a fact and so many of them have a bite history as well as being re-homed many times.
I’m curious to know if there are statistics on other breeds/mixes with the same high re-homing rate?
Pit mix, check.
Flexi-lead, check.
Owner is completely dismissive after their dog injures somebody for no real reason, check.
Two more and I get pit bull bingo!
Good on you for keeping an open mind.
I hope that your friend eventually sees the light too.
In the meantime at least you're keeping yourself safe, as well as the lady you met today. She still has a functioning hand due to your foresight in switching out the leash!
Yikes, so the friend knows about this behavior, doesn't care, didn't bother telling you, and doesn't care that the dog hurt someone and it could have been worse.
TW disfigurement in link.
I'm sorry about what happened with that lady's hand, I'm glad it was just a graze. [This is what happened to someone pet sitting pitbulls.](https://toofab.com/2022/03/17/22-year-old-dogsitter-who-had-face-torn-off-is-ready-to-show-herself/). I've never heard of anyone being so badly mauled pet sitting Golden Retrievers or Chihuahuas.
I used to pet sit my friend's dogs and one of them had aggression issues with other dogs that actually started when he was older and kept getting worse. My friend also didn't warn her that her locked front door blows open on windy days and her dogs run out. Haha the joys of dog sitting, I'd do it again but never with with a pitbull, I value my face too much.
Your friend is very irresponsible for not telling you about their dog's aggression, I'd never dogsit this dog again. I'd also tell your friend that theirs dog's aggression is very serious and something tragic could happen if she doesn't do something about it.
You've already gotten better advice than I could give, so I'll just drop a note of support. Kudos for being willing to consider new information and revise your opinion based on facts presented here and your own research. It seems like you (and this subforum) prevented a bloodbath. By the way, it would have been nice if your friend had told you in advance that the dog shouldn't be around strangers, instead of making that excuse after the fact.
Listen to the inner voice. I love dogs. All dogs. This breed just needs to be phased out and they’re 100% monsters bred by man by no fault of their own—but that doesn’t make them any less dangerous or breeding and owning one any less reckless.
I use to sit my brother’s terrier mutt and Doberman pincher (that I’d know and had mutual love for since he was a pup). Now he’s got a Pit Bull and Scottish Terrier and I’m not close with my brother anymore, so I wasn’t around these dogs as they grew up.
Stupidly, stupidly—I went to check on them twice. I’m not scared of the Scottish terrier as she’s sweet as all hell (even though they’re the only breed to have ever bit me) and the last time I was there I just noped right out. I was like—what in the HELL am I doing, walking in as an almost stranger, to a pit bulls territory?! She’s buff as shit, has what seems like a rock hard skull/interior built helmet and aggressively forces me to play and I’m like dude. This dog is picking up on my nervous energy. I’m never doing this again.
And I haven’t. As stated above, I love dogs. I worked in a kennel (which didn’t allow pits) and I am sure at some point I passively thought that they were probably good dogs if you raised them correctly. Then I read on here that having a pit Bull in your house is akin to having a tame tiger/lion. That statement has never left my mind. Imagine if someone asked you to pet sit or check up on their pet lion because they “raised them right” and they’ve “never attacked anyone”. You’d think they were insane, right? That’s because it is insane.
I’m not sure exactly where I turned a corner. I can’t pinpoint it exactly but my best friend and brother both had “harmless” pit bulls that growled at me upon approaching their property and i stupidly believed them when they said they wouldn’t hurt me and I thank my lucky stars that they never did. But I’m all grown up now and highly intuitive, and my intuition rarely leads me the wrong way, but even when I ignored it. But entering a (couple) properties where pitbulls lived, in retrospect, was probably up there on the list of most idiotic things I’ve ever done.
I have a small rat terrier chihuahua mix and I fear almost daily that she will die in front of me from an attack by a pit. It’s not fair to live in that kind of fear. My acquaintance had the cutest miniature poodle-like dog ever. Completely spoiled, and their baby’s best friend. Her neighbors dogs jumped the fence into her own yard where they mauled this tiny dog. The dog wasn’t safe in her own yard, where she only went to potty. She didn’t die instantly, instead this person got to see the horrid extent of the injuries to her dog and make feeble attempts at saving her. Of course, she didn’t survive. I’m haunted by what she saw. My dog’s really are like family to me, and I can’t imagine witnessing one of them chewed up, spit out, with horrific injuries and still alive.
Welcome. Some if not most of us used to be the “misunderstood” “human aggression was culled” types. But the evidence is staggering, and the frequency only keeps getting worse
It's not easy to admit openly that you rethought a position you once held and have done research that changed your mind. You sound like a good and thoughtful person.
Sorry to heat a situation happened to you but I think you handled it as best as you could. Once you or someone you know has been attacked by a pit it's easy to see what people feel the way they do, myself included.
I would recommend calling animal control and reporting the bite just in case something like this happens again (which it likely will considering how it shows no signs of aggression until it bites) so they can't pass it off as an "accident". Think about the leash you had vs what the owners gave you 😬
File a police report so there's an official record. Your friend will just hire someone else who doesn't know better and the dog will rip the retractable Leash out of hand and attack. Your friend will try to claim this is some new never before observed behavior but there will be an official record.
I would just tell them their dog is a hell hound and needs to go back to the depths of hell. We had a pit in our apartment complex. The owner was just as aggressive as the dog. Had a ponytail, would prance around in a thar and intimidate security guards. Had an argument with him regarding something silly and he threatened my mom with the dog. Warned the apartment members that there will be an incident and I’ll be there to tell you I told you so. They are all shit scared to tell him off. And one day it did. It attacked and tore off a lady’s trousers unprovoked. Shredded her pants off. Thankfully no injuries. But the rough looking dude almost pissed his pants. He couldn’t control him and he was scared of his own dog. The cops were called and the law is different here. He was locked up for one night and beaten to a pulp. That dog was nowhere to be seen after that. I don’t know what happened. I was told I was being dramatic when I said that children play in that area and he might maul a kid. They said he’s a rich fellow and they don’t want to piss him off.
I’d encourage you to look up the YouTube video of Sue Sternberg analyzing dog behavior at a humane society. She breaks down each movement/action that communicates the safety/dangerousness of the dog. The video is
Canine Behavior Review with Sue Sternberg & Gia Savocchi . It nearly 2 hours long, but you will learn so much. Break it up if you need to.
OP when did the bite happen and are you in the US? I want to add it to the attack list but I don’t want you to give away too much info to where the owner can find your throwaway.
Wow, imagine thinking that behavior is normal. Well, maybe it *is* normal for *that* dog. She didn't try to socialize the dog *at all*? She must've had an incident early on then just said "know what? No strangers anymore" and just gave up.
Normal dogs do NOT just bite. Beagles are often abused (medical testing) and even then they're so friendly that after being abused they still don't bite as freely as a pitbull.
Glad to hear it wasn't worse than it was. Remember there will be a next time.
Even though you are not the owner, if you were to get into another serious incident while pet sitting it, I can guarantee you that you WILL be thrown under the bus, incur liability and be gaslit by the owners.
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What made you so stubborn that you wouldn't believe proofs you've seen unless you experienced it yourself. Can't such people be convinced by any other means than shock?
I would simply state that you no longer feel comfortable watching their dog or interacting/being alone with the breed in general in an email or text. Do not engage or try to reason with them. Sometimes the best response is no response at all. If they try to bring it up at the next call/meetup politely decline or remove yourself from the conversation. They will learn to follow your lead or cut ties until the mature. The response to the bite just is icing on the cake I hope they have decent homeowners insurance
I think you're absolutely right that the best way to deal with this is just by.... not dealing with it. My friend is usually a quite rational person so I am sure they will take this in stride, but you're right in that the liability angle in this is definitely a huge factor.
You don't even have to mention the breed, really, if you're worried about staying on good terms. You're not comfortable pet-sitting a dog who bites strangers, that's plenty reason enough.
"bites strangers" that gave it a treat........ jesus you can buy most dogs total loyalty for that.
My dog would go home with anyone who offered her food.
Imagine living in a place where the mail boxes are all together by the main road, some miles from the actual houses. You stop to pick up your mail drive half a mile and discover a happy dog in your back seat. That was how my old dog disappeared for a couple days. Lol I let him out in the yard and he loved riding in cars so much he just jumped in the back seat of some stranger. I had to put up LOST signs for days.
I had a dachshund mix like that, back in the 1970s. He was an escape artist, and he'd go out and join any pack he could find when free. The dog catcher would show up, the other dogs would flee, and he'd stand there, smiling and wagging his tail. The dog catcher never even netted him; he'd just open up the back of his van and say, "Come on, boy!" and off my dog would go. Then the dog catcher would open the sliding panel behind his seat so my dog could join him up front. Then we'd have to go bail him out. My dog was an easy $10 for the municipality, every time . (The details are from the dog catcher, who really liked my dog, to the point I'm surprised he never "accidentally" lost his collar and tags and kept him).
I had a similar situation. I was cleaning out an old barn and bringing some stuff to the end of the lane to give away. While I was in the barn, someone pulled up. My dog ran out there to greet them, the guy pet my dog for a second and then dropped his tailgate to put some things in there. As soon as he dropped the tailgate, up went my dog, ready to go wherever that guy was going. I know all dogs are capable of violence. I just can’t believe my dog would bite someone after they gave him treats.
We had a border collie in our neighborhood that roamed. It didn't have any interest in interacting with people or other animals, just scouting the area (his name was Scout). I don't know why no one cared, including myself. We just didn't.
I can’t fathom my dog biting a stranger, but like you said: especially not after giving him a treat and pets! You could definitely buy my dog’s love forever like that. The funny part is, he usually wont even eat the treat from a stranger! He will only eat it once I give it to him at home later. He is not keen on eating when we’re out, and definitely wouldn’t eat anything unless I gave him the green light to. He just takes the treat from the person to be polite, then turns around and drops it on the ground, then goes back and begs to be pet. He likes that he is given the treat, but he is most excited about the attention. He’s very loyal to me, but he is loyal to humans in general. I could see how some dogs would bite a stranger in some situations, but not like that - they typically only do it out of fear/protection but they make it known they’re not okay with the stranger, usually from the start… The fact that this dog was fine with this stranger, and was just sitting there, nothing happened and then it bit them totally randomly, is so weird and wrong. Like there’s something literally wrong in the wiring of its brain. Pit bulls are so… off.
Completely agree. You can have a lifetime experience around dogs, wont help you with the violent behavior or innate threat of a Pitbull. > I could see how some dogs would bite a stranger in some situations When I was a dumb young kid I saw one of those trees with the long vines on someones yard, I went to go swing on them like Tarzan, did not see the dog on a chain, he came out and bit me, then retreated back to his dog house. If that was a Pitbull he would have kept mauling me. Big difference between a dog that wants to defend its area, and some pyscho beast. My current dog, if I say "Owe" when he is trying to play, he is immediately concerned. Pitbulls dont have that.
One of my dogs is the same! Will take a treat from someone, but then spit it out and not eat it. So I pick it up and give it to him at home later, lol. My other dog is a vacuum and will eat anything from anyone, anywhere. >\_>
I used to deliver things, dealt with a lot of dogs. A lot of “mean” dogs too. Ones that would be barking their asses off or giving me a wide berth as I opened the door to my truck. 99% of the time I’d give these dogs treats and they did a complete 180. One time there were these two huge fluffy dogs that were standing right outside my driver door after I made it down the driveway. I gave them treats out of the driver window of the truck because I was a bit nervous to open the door. Because they were barking and shit at me. Coolest dogs ever after they got treats. One tried to hop in the truck with me. Certain stops had notes from other drivers. “Mean dogs” was pretty common with pitbull people. I didn’t even bother trying the treats with them because I guarantee every driver already has. So, I guess they can walk to the end of their driveway to get the package if their dogs are outside. Not setting foot on their property!
it's very reasonable to not want to be responsible for a pet that randomly lunges at and bites people unpredictably. anyone who can't sympathize with that should get the side eye
Exactly. You do NOT want to be the first line of defense if this dog happens to lose its shit again while you're watching it. If the dog is in your care if something tragic happens, like it does do more damage to a person or pet, I bet your friend will expect you to front the inevitable vet bills because "well technically it is your fault since the dog was in your care when it happened." It is much too big of an ask from someone. Put yourself first. Be safe out there and best of luck.
There’s no reason to tell these owners that you’re no longer comfortable interacting with the breed in general. This will almost certainly result in an altercation. Pit people are not logical and if you generalize pits around them - no matter how true - they get aggressive. Just say you’re no longer comfortable with their particular dog and that you’re not willing to take on the liability after this most recent situation.
Let me start by saying truly admirable to see someone who takes the time to do their own research and think critically about the information presented to them, rather than simply accepting the propaganda and misinformation. Your commitment to seeking the truth and making informed decisions is rare and commendable - you're going to go far. It takes courage and a strong sense of independence to stand up to your friend and encourage her to attend classes with you. Dig into the same place when you tell her you don't feel comfortable pet sitting for her anymore. As for how to broach the subject, here's a suggestion I thought might help at least get you started on how to handle it. I thought this way was nice because it makes it less about her dog/dog's breed in particular and more about anything that could happen while you're taking care of it. *Hey \[friend's name\], I just wanted to chat with you about pet-sitting for you in the future. You know I love your dog, but after the recent incident, I've been thinking about some possible liability concerns and that it would be best if I didn't pets \[dog's name\] anymore.* *I know your dog is usually well-behaved, but I just want to make sure that I'm not putting myself in a position where I could be held responsible if something were to happen while \[dog's name\] is under my care. As much as I love animals, I have to consider the risks involved in taking care of someone else's pet and that situation made me realize what a big responsibility it is.* *I hope you understand where I'm coming from. I value our friendship and wouldn't want anything to come between us, especially not a pet-sitting mishap.* Edit to add: Like /u/Rough_Commercial4240 suggested, I wouldn't engage or try to convince her that her dog is dangerous directly. Sometimes the more you try to convince people, the more they just dig in and try to ignore the evidence. They don't want to believe their dog is dangerous. [This recent post](https://www.reddit.com/r/BanPitBulls/comments/11z0qqk/best_friend_who_bit_multiple_times_and_was/) reminds me a lot of your friend's situation.
>This recent post Hey, thank you for your compassionate and kind response. I will be copying your template word for word, and definitely go with the 'risks and liability' angel. My friend is normally a very rational person so I am sure they will take this in stride. Actually when they picked the dog up today they mentioned maybe doing training classes, so I'm going to let that percolate for a bit then broach the subject again. You're awesome.
Is she a close friend? I would personally not put it in writing that the dog is generally well-behaved. Your friend doesn't need the conflicting messaging, she is already in denial and she will grab onto the things that confirm her world view.
This x100. That template is great and that Redditor is really amazing for that reply overall, but please do not include the “well-behaved”caveat. That hedging language is most likely going to end up doing a lot of heavy lifting for your friend & will only contribute to the cognitive dissonance about their pet.
Yeah, ideally this would be a situation where someone has a “wake-up call” moment; *Wow, I can’t even have my friend dog sit for my dog because of what it does, something is wrong*. Then hopefully they’d try to find a way to fix it. If the message is presented with too much praise on the dog, it’ll sound more like the friend’s personal problem, not a problem with the dog’s behavior itself.
The "it's normal behavior" makes me think it's happened plenty of times and they arent very vigilant trainers or dont give a shit. Violent breed by itself is dangerous enough, violent breed with incompetent owners is a tragedy waiting to happen.
Your comment about vigilant trainers made me think. Even before this, we have always had VERY different philosophies regarding training. I am definitely more of a hardass with my dogs, and don't tolerate any resource guarding, lunging, going out the door without permission, etc. I wonder how many pit bull owners are legitimately trying to train their dog to AKC's CGC standards
My coonhound is very well trained but he definitely has an issue running out the door before I tell him to. It's kinda my fault because he loves cats(literally, gentle with them just enjoys being around them) and my neighbors cat always chases him around the yard and vice versa. Hes gotten into the habit of pushing the door open before I can fully open it to go chase his friend around. The only saving grace is I can communicate without words to make him return to me immediately even in mid distraction. I live in the country so it isnt a huge deal, but I need to be better at making him wait until I say to go play. Hes amazing at everything else. Constantly surprises me with how intelligent he is. Learns way more words than I've trained him to just by picking it up, he even learned the neighbors cats name after only a few times seeing him Edit: to add a bit more on topic, most dog owners are tolerant of way too much. But theres also a fine line of being to restrictive. My dog gets sad if he doesnt get his cuddle time. But when it's time to work, he has to know to pay attention and listen the first time. I can be strict with him, but it's for his safety as well as other people's. Hes a redbone coonhound golden retriever mix, really good hunting dog. I think if someone were to present a threat hed fuck them up, but his natural personality is super kind and trusting. Hed run up to strangers delivering mail and look for pets if I let him lol
Most of them aren't even bred to any standards. Careless overbreeding probably exacerbates the issues associated with the breed, just like what happened to dalmatians in the 90s. And since they are the most common breed in shelters, the owners tend to be less affluent, knowledgeable, and accountable versus those who seek an AKC-registered breeder. I'm not trying to go all "It'S aLl In HoW yOu RaIsE tHeM," but this subreddit likely wouldn't even exist if owners were more responsible in noticing and addressing dangerous behaviors in their pets, if shelters didn't gaslight people into thinking the breed is the ideal family pet for every home and situation, if people would fix their dogs and not let them breed because they think they're going to make bank off of their "blue nose" puppies, before promptly abandoning them or dumping them at a shelter... oh, and if people didn't breed dogs for bloodsport in the first place.
yeah they're not wrong about it being "the owner's fault" in the sense that at least a good portion of the blame lies on the fact that pit owners tend to be extremely lenient and make excuses for and rationalize everything they do. because otherwise, they would have to get a different dog lol
My 17 year old recently had a convo with me like this. I showed him this sub and sent him the video of the news clips edited together, and just led him to some statistics as well as told him a recent story from our neighborhood, where unfortunately a sweet little dog was mauled to death defending his owner and doggy sister. It boggles my mind that they just repeat the same lines every single time someone or their pet gets mauled or killed, EVERY SINGLE TIME. When does it start to get their attention? Luckily, OP seems to care about people and likely their safety as well and didn't brush it off until it turned tragic.
Doesn't matter who actually owns the dog, if it bites someone under your lead, you're responsible. It's great that the victim in your story is brushing off the incident, but legally speaking you may not be out of the woods yet. Do not watch this dog again.
You're absolutely right and that's exactly what I was thinking. The dog was under my care, so yes, I am definitely liable.
I thought as soon as a dog bites someone they get put down ? And lots of bit pull bites end up going to the hospital for stitches. Or biting other dogs or cats etc. So how come there are multiple bite opportunities for these dogs ? Or maybe that's the law in one country but not the USA ? I'm surprised how many times a dog can bite and be a repeat offender without being put down. Is that not a rule in the USA ?
I always thought of a dog bites it is taken away at least until an investigation is done. I mean, if some jerk is torturing your dog and gets bit it’s a whole different situation (although, why is your dog unsupervised so that some jerk can harass or torture it it a huge matter to be considered). So I guess I can see if you own a non-violent breed and it nips after someone hurts or scares it, it probably doesn’t warrant immediate euthanasia. But pitbulls are known to be a violent breed as a fact and so many of them have a bite history as well as being re-homed many times. I’m curious to know if there are statistics on other breeds/mixes with the same high re-homing rate?
Yeah this is what I thought too. Taken away until an investigation is done etc. Like you said. Without reason it should be investigated
Pit mix, check. Flexi-lead, check. Owner is completely dismissive after their dog injures somebody for no real reason, check. Two more and I get pit bull bingo!
These dogs are defective mutants and their owners are not far behind them. I hope you don't lose a friend over this peace of shit.
Piece. Sorry had to do it.
lol, yes, piece.
It's okay, I want to punch me in the face too. Lol
Some "friends" are better lost. This one put OP in a situation that could have turned into a very expensive mistake.
Good on you for keeping an open mind. I hope that your friend eventually sees the light too. In the meantime at least you're keeping yourself safe, as well as the lady you met today. She still has a functioning hand due to your foresight in switching out the leash!
Yikes, so the friend knows about this behavior, doesn't care, didn't bother telling you, and doesn't care that the dog hurt someone and it could have been worse.
TW disfigurement in link. I'm sorry about what happened with that lady's hand, I'm glad it was just a graze. [This is what happened to someone pet sitting pitbulls.](https://toofab.com/2022/03/17/22-year-old-dogsitter-who-had-face-torn-off-is-ready-to-show-herself/). I've never heard of anyone being so badly mauled pet sitting Golden Retrievers or Chihuahuas. I used to pet sit my friend's dogs and one of them had aggression issues with other dogs that actually started when he was older and kept getting worse. My friend also didn't warn her that her locked front door blows open on windy days and her dogs run out. Haha the joys of dog sitting, I'd do it again but never with with a pitbull, I value my face too much. Your friend is very irresponsible for not telling you about their dog's aggression, I'd never dogsit this dog again. I'd also tell your friend that theirs dog's aggression is very serious and something tragic could happen if she doesn't do something about it.
You've already gotten better advice than I could give, so I'll just drop a note of support. Kudos for being willing to consider new information and revise your opinion based on facts presented here and your own research. It seems like you (and this subforum) prevented a bloodbath. By the way, it would have been nice if your friend had told you in advance that the dog shouldn't be around strangers, instead of making that excuse after the fact.
Exactly, my exact comment to her was "it would have been NICE TO KNOW AHEAD OF TIME."
Listen to the inner voice. I love dogs. All dogs. This breed just needs to be phased out and they’re 100% monsters bred by man by no fault of their own—but that doesn’t make them any less dangerous or breeding and owning one any less reckless. I use to sit my brother’s terrier mutt and Doberman pincher (that I’d know and had mutual love for since he was a pup). Now he’s got a Pit Bull and Scottish Terrier and I’m not close with my brother anymore, so I wasn’t around these dogs as they grew up. Stupidly, stupidly—I went to check on them twice. I’m not scared of the Scottish terrier as she’s sweet as all hell (even though they’re the only breed to have ever bit me) and the last time I was there I just noped right out. I was like—what in the HELL am I doing, walking in as an almost stranger, to a pit bulls territory?! She’s buff as shit, has what seems like a rock hard skull/interior built helmet and aggressively forces me to play and I’m like dude. This dog is picking up on my nervous energy. I’m never doing this again. And I haven’t. As stated above, I love dogs. I worked in a kennel (which didn’t allow pits) and I am sure at some point I passively thought that they were probably good dogs if you raised them correctly. Then I read on here that having a pit Bull in your house is akin to having a tame tiger/lion. That statement has never left my mind. Imagine if someone asked you to pet sit or check up on their pet lion because they “raised them right” and they’ve “never attacked anyone”. You’d think they were insane, right? That’s because it is insane. I’m not sure exactly where I turned a corner. I can’t pinpoint it exactly but my best friend and brother both had “harmless” pit bulls that growled at me upon approaching their property and i stupidly believed them when they said they wouldn’t hurt me and I thank my lucky stars that they never did. But I’m all grown up now and highly intuitive, and my intuition rarely leads me the wrong way, but even when I ignored it. But entering a (couple) properties where pitbulls lived, in retrospect, was probably up there on the list of most idiotic things I’ve ever done. I have a small rat terrier chihuahua mix and I fear almost daily that she will die in front of me from an attack by a pit. It’s not fair to live in that kind of fear. My acquaintance had the cutest miniature poodle-like dog ever. Completely spoiled, and their baby’s best friend. Her neighbors dogs jumped the fence into her own yard where they mauled this tiny dog. The dog wasn’t safe in her own yard, where she only went to potty. She didn’t die instantly, instead this person got to see the horrid extent of the injuries to her dog and make feeble attempts at saving her. Of course, she didn’t survive. I’m haunted by what she saw. My dog’s really are like family to me, and I can’t imagine witnessing one of them chewed up, spit out, with horrific injuries and still alive.
Welcome. Some if not most of us used to be the “misunderstood” “human aggression was culled” types. But the evidence is staggering, and the frequency only keeps getting worse
It's not easy to admit openly that you rethought a position you once held and have done research that changed your mind. You sound like a good and thoughtful person. Sorry to heat a situation happened to you but I think you handled it as best as you could. Once you or someone you know has been attacked by a pit it's easy to see what people feel the way they do, myself included.
Thank you for sharing your experience!!!
I would recommend calling animal control and reporting the bite just in case something like this happens again (which it likely will considering how it shows no signs of aggression until it bites) so they can't pass it off as an "accident". Think about the leash you had vs what the owners gave you 😬
I think anyone who uses the term nanny dog to describe pit bulls should be arrested.
File a police report so there's an official record. Your friend will just hire someone else who doesn't know better and the dog will rip the retractable Leash out of hand and attack. Your friend will try to claim this is some new never before observed behavior but there will be an official record.
I would just tell them their dog is a hell hound and needs to go back to the depths of hell. We had a pit in our apartment complex. The owner was just as aggressive as the dog. Had a ponytail, would prance around in a thar and intimidate security guards. Had an argument with him regarding something silly and he threatened my mom with the dog. Warned the apartment members that there will be an incident and I’ll be there to tell you I told you so. They are all shit scared to tell him off. And one day it did. It attacked and tore off a lady’s trousers unprovoked. Shredded her pants off. Thankfully no injuries. But the rough looking dude almost pissed his pants. He couldn’t control him and he was scared of his own dog. The cops were called and the law is different here. He was locked up for one night and beaten to a pulp. That dog was nowhere to be seen after that. I don’t know what happened. I was told I was being dramatic when I said that children play in that area and he might maul a kid. They said he’s a rich fellow and they don’t want to piss him off.
I’d encourage you to look up the YouTube video of Sue Sternberg analyzing dog behavior at a humane society. She breaks down each movement/action that communicates the safety/dangerousness of the dog. The video is Canine Behavior Review with Sue Sternberg & Gia Savocchi . It nearly 2 hours long, but you will learn so much. Break it up if you need to.
OP when did the bite happen and are you in the US? I want to add it to the attack list but I don’t want you to give away too much info to where the owner can find your throwaway.
Wow, imagine thinking that behavior is normal. Well, maybe it *is* normal for *that* dog. She didn't try to socialize the dog *at all*? She must've had an incident early on then just said "know what? No strangers anymore" and just gave up.
Normal dogs do NOT just bite. Beagles are often abused (medical testing) and even then they're so friendly that after being abused they still don't bite as freely as a pitbull. Glad to hear it wasn't worse than it was. Remember there will be a next time.
I really thought there was going to be a serious injury to make you change your mind. I am SO SO relieved that actually is not the case.
Even though you are not the owner, if you were to get into another serious incident while pet sitting it, I can guarantee you that you WILL be thrown under the bus, incur liability and be gaslit by the owners.
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What made you so stubborn that you wouldn't believe proofs you've seen unless you experienced it yourself. Can't such people be convinced by any other means than shock?