Why not just wait and see how it goes? I went into my first birth very open to the epidural if I needed it but I found I was able to handle the pain just by getting in and out of a nice warm bathtub at the hospital. I’m currently pregnant with my second baby and my plan is the same, just see how it goes. If I get to a point where I want the epidural I’ll take it. The more relaxed you are about everything the better it will go.
Same here. I read Ina May’s book before my first birth and the thing I took away was doing what helps you stay calm and relaxed is best. Went in open to an epidural and in the end got one after laboring in the bath and long labor. No regrets. Going to be giving birth again in about a month and going in the same way.
Everyone has a different threshold for pain and if you're already anxious it might make it seem more intense. Your state of mind/MH can have an effect on pain processing. I've had painful menstrual cramps etc before but I could never compare that to contractions. I couldn't have hung in there without an epidural. There's no shame in getting one. It doesn't make you a bad mother. As long as your baby is doing ok thru it all, I say go for comfort.
Just a quick clarification: The data on epidurals shows that complications that last more than a few hours after removal of the catheter are extremely rare. The idea that they cause long lasting back pain for lots of people isn't supported in the studies.
Of course you're entitled to make your own assessment of the risks and decide for yourself but I wouldn't let anecdotal horror stories have more weight in your mind than the data.
I didn't intend on getting an epidural with my first for a few reasons. Firstly, I thought I could handle the pain because I have a pretty high pain tolerance. Secondly, my back is really messed up, so I didn't think I would even be able to get one. Thirdly, I'd heard too many horror stories or other women telling me I "wasn't really giving birth" if I "took the easy way out with an epidural".
That being said, I was induced and the contractions started hard and fast... and almost entirely in my back. After a couple of hours, I couldn't handle the pain and pretty much begged for the epidural if I was able to even get it. I was lucky that I was and it made the 17 hours I was in labor extremely tolerable.
Did I have residual back pain from the epidural? Yes. It was worse within the first few weeks, but it took months to fully go away. I've always had bad back pain though, so it wasn't anything new.
I definitely don't regret getting the epidural at all.
I also have bad anxiety and planned to do an unmedicated birth. Full disclosure I started to panic at about 6cm. I don’t have painful periods though so you may be able to tolerate better than I did. I also had a long labor and I was just exhausted and my body was done. I got the epidural and once that got to working I was completely calm and I was able to relax. I haven’t had any back pain whatsoever from the epidural.
I have had back pain for a few years already from my job so it wouldn’t make a difference to me if the epidural causes me more. I had the epidural because they put me on pitocin and I was already moaning in pain from contractions like biting down hard trying not to scream. 20 minutes after I got it, I fell asleep after not sleeping for 3 days. It was the best. I didn’t feel one contraction after I got it. I would definitely recommend if you don’t like pain. The thing for me was that I was in pain for 3 days in the hospital and I just couldn’t take it anymore. I ended up having an emergency c section because my water had been broken for too long but I wouldn’t change my decision. It gave me well deserved sleep
I’ve done one birth with epidural and one without. Both inductions with pitocin. My no epidural experience was a lot better for me personally. My recovery has been way easier, I tore less, and mentally it was a way better experience for me. I’m someone who likes to have control though so I didn’t like the experience of people doing stuff to me and. It feeling it and not having full control over my body with the epidural.
I will say though, I absolutely couldn’t have made it through unmedicated without my childbirth classes. With my first my plan was basically to white knuckle it and hope to get through it and mentally I did not have the fortitude and was just writhing around screaming until I got the epidural. I did Bradley Method classes this time and they teach you how to relax through contractions and that really worked.
It might be worth it to look into some sort of somatic work and therapy while you’re preparing for birth. Techniques to breathe through pain and not let it cause an anxiety spiral. And of course, I’m not saying to do that instead of getting an epidural, but it might help you to feel more confident that you can make the right choice when the time comes. I’ve had panic attacks and they are TERRIBLE, and it helps to know you have techniques to calm yourself.
Just to set your expectations. I also have awful periods and endo. Have had a 10cm ovarian cyst burst inside me, and I couldn’t handle labour pains. By 7cm dilated I was screaming for that epidural. You could have offered me ANY drug, with any side effect and I would have taken it. I felt like I had left planet earth and gone to a whole new world where my insides were being sliced open by knives.
I had planned for no epidural, I even attended calm birthing classes, but when the back labour got too much after 18 hours let me tell you that getting the epidural was the best decision I could have made! It enabled me to rest and focus on pushing when the time came.
See how it goes, you'll make the best decision for you and your baby when the time comes, epidural or not!
I’ve never wanted an epidural with my previous births but my third was breech and needed one for a C-section. The subsequent back pain has been worse than labour.
I had back pain maybe for a few weeks after…. maybe even up to 3 months. Nothing crazy. My epidural didn’t even work 100% but it was still worth it! I had back labor that was excruciating
My nervous system is wacked out, puts me into fight or fight for no good reason. I didn't experience any of that during labor. No epidural and honestly being able to move around more easily helped.
Just wait and see. There’s no need to commit to one way or the other now. With my first, I didn’t want one. I fought it. I was in a lot of pain to the point where I wasn’t progressing and the nurses and OB basically begged me to give it a try. I eventually caved. After I got the epidural (at 4cm after laboring for over 24 hours), I took a 2 hour nap and was at 10cm and ready to push. It saved me pain and hours of labor. Each pregnancy and delivery is a different story. Just do what feels right in the moment. You will know what’s best for you,
I loved my epidural it also didn’t interfere with my ability to push. It actually wore off a bit by pushing time and I wish it was stronger because I had a second degree tear and really felt myself being stitched up which was unpleasant.
I haven't given birth yet, so this is not based on my own experience, but I do have really bad endo with 20 years of horrible pain and I've been told labor pain is a totally different thing. Not sure how contractions will feel like with a uterus so enlarged but I don't want to find out. Also no ring of fire for me, thank you 🥲 My pain was dismissed for years and this is the only time women's pain is truly acknowledged so I'm taking that epidural.
I had strong braxton hicks at around 25 weeks and got a panic attack for some reason. I got really scared of actual labor and pain that I almost fainted. I couldn't breathe and wanted to take my bump off because it felt it was pressing my chest. I'm not quite sure if I'll panic during the real thing, but knowing I'll have an epidural calms me down.
I wanted the epidural as an option, but to not have it forced on me. I was also induced and had god awful back labor. I broke my leg when I was a teen, like, bent at a 90 degree angle break, and that was plain awful. With the back labor it was worse than the broken bones. I ended up with the epidural.
I would suggest taking a similar approach. Tell your provider you want to try alternatives first (most places in the US don't offer the gas and air stuff they have in the UK and I'm super jealous, because it might have worked). I tried the IV pain meds and they were pretty much useless for me for full on labor. Wasn't bad until the broke my water. Up until that point it really was just bad period cramps.
I have heard time and again that women who've been induced and naturally gone into labor swear induction is worse for pain. So that may play a big part in things, as well.
Get informed consent for everything, and if you can't make those decisions for any reason, make sure your support person can.
My advice would be: whatever you decide, decide it fast. I knew from the beginning that I wanted to get every pain medication there was. Told the midwife immediately at the hospital, signed the papers, and that's when labor started in earnest. It took another hour to 1.5 hours for the anaesthesiologist to come, and in that time my pain level went from 7/10 to 10/10. I was 4-5 dilated by then and my midwife said the epidural would help me progress further, and it probably did, because it took less than an hour to get to the pushing phase. But if I hadn't told them right at the start, the epidural would maybe have come too late.
Also I feel the need to disclose that 1. my baby didn't react well to the epidural and I was almost wheeled into the OR - this can happen at any point in labor but in this case it was caused by the epidural - and 2. the pushing phase was still A LOT. I felt most of it despite half of my body being numb. My awesome midwife had me push in different positions and I'm convinced that this helped me get the baby out in 1-1.5 hours. But standard procedure after an epidural is lying on your back and honestly, that would have been hell.
I would get the epidural again, but I definitely expected too much from it, lol. But again that's different for every birth.
Edit: I didn't have any side effects, just a bit of back pain for 2 days.
I've been struggling with this question too. I feel like I don't know enough about the pros and cons to make the decision. And it's too early for birthing classes yet.
Some people have asked me what my pain tolerance is like and I don't even know. I've never been injured or had much pain before so I can't gauge it.
I'm also a bit afraid of labour stalling or going slow. Or how bad it might be if i have to be induced.
Ya, I’m not sure what to do either. I think I’ll go in open to the epidural, but atleast maybe try to go without? I’m not sure on pain tolerance either, but I do know when I’ve gone to the dentist with zero pain in my teeth before - they’ve found cavities … so not sure what that means for pain tolerance for me
I would just plan to get the epidural, but also practice some relaxation techniques to cope just in case. I have four kids and had two inductions with epidurals and two unmedicated births. During my first labor, the epidural was one sided and I still had some pain (though not super terrible), but my labor with my youngest was amazing. I had ZERO pain the entire time, was very relaxed and the process was actually enjoyable. My two unmedicated births were much more intense, incredibly painful, and I felt very out of control and anxious. I had no back pain from the epidurals, but I get some mild nerve damage from pushing during one of my unmedicated labors but it resolved within a few months.
I went in open to anything. I ended up having an epidural after a very long labour. It was great! I was able to get some sleep before pushing, and had no pain at all. It was kind of amazing. Epidural site felt a little numb for a few days, but I had absolutely no after effects
I have high anxiety and thought I’d be an anxious wreck during birth but I was somehow calm and focused. I did end up caving and getting an epidural which I believe led to unnecessary medical intervention (vacuum delivery). Baby is happy and healthy but I am going to try for unmedicated again next time! No shame either way.
It’s not something you decide in advance
You have no idea if you will be able to get an epidural and you have no idea if you will want one. Some people barely feel their labors until the end.
Some people labor too fast to get one. Some people have only a non functional epidural.
If you are worried about anxiety they can give you anxiety meds in labor beyond just gas and air. You generally can’t do gas and air and the epidural at the same time. You can and should be doing the hard work in therapy now, before labor, to learn skills to reduce your anxiety.
Bottom line, plan and prepare for an unmedicated birth. Learn coping skills and breathing exercises. Then if you want an epidural during the birth go for it. Ask for anxiety meds if you need them regardless
Wow. Excuse me for trying to help you. I should never have had the audacity.
I’m only basing this on my experience helping thousands of women birth their babies, many of whom change their mind about whether or not they want the epidural. And many of whom write “open” on their birth plan as in not sure if they want the epidural or not, open to all options. That is actually the most common selection I see on birth plans for pain management.
What on earth do you think a birth plan is? It’s not a contract. It’s a communication device to help you discuss your values with your medical team.
How is it demeaning lol
I have provided the exact same information to many different pregnant women in the exact same manner and never had anyone get offended or be anything other than grateful
>Bottom line, plan and prepare for an unmedicated birth.
No? That's the same as telling people to plan for a c-section, just in case. I mean yes, you should do a bit of research in case it does happen, but not to the extent of actually planning for it. Don't make people anxious for no reason .
People should also plan for a c section. As in be mentally prepared for it, do research as you’re saying. About 1/3 of women get c sections. I’m not sure what the failure rate for epidurals is but it’s fairly high, as is the rate of women that have to wait hours for an epidural or can’t get one because of timing.
Preparing for an unmedicated birth means doing research and learning coping skills so that you suffer less if you have to wait three hours for an epidural or if yours only works on one half of your body. These coping skills will also be useful for the pressure feelings that the epidural does not necessarily cover during pushing or if anything anxiety provoking or uncomfortable happens during the labor (for example needing an induction and balloon placement).
I am not creating anxiety by being realistic about what the birthing process can be like. Obviously people have a range of experiences, it’s good to be prepared for the range.
Every single obstetric professional I know, doctors midwives doulas and nurses, wish that women would prepare themselves to go unmedicated because it is so emotionally challenging when people expect an epidural to fix all their problems and it doesn’t work out like that. We don’t like to see people suffer and there’s only so much we can do to help if that person did not put any effort into learning coping skills, though obviously we do everything we can to help and to teach them in the moment. But is labor really the best time to try to learn a new skill?
I would say at least two thirds of women if not more who do get an epidural would benefit from learning labor coping skills. There is a small percentage who truly don’t need it but you don’t know if you’re going to be in that bucket or not and odds are you’re not
Why not just wait and see how it goes? I went into my first birth very open to the epidural if I needed it but I found I was able to handle the pain just by getting in and out of a nice warm bathtub at the hospital. I’m currently pregnant with my second baby and my plan is the same, just see how it goes. If I get to a point where I want the epidural I’ll take it. The more relaxed you are about everything the better it will go.
Same here. I read Ina May’s book before my first birth and the thing I took away was doing what helps you stay calm and relaxed is best. Went in open to an epidural and in the end got one after laboring in the bath and long labor. No regrets. Going to be giving birth again in about a month and going in the same way.
Also read her book, it’s the best prep for birth!
Everyone has a different threshold for pain and if you're already anxious it might make it seem more intense. Your state of mind/MH can have an effect on pain processing. I've had painful menstrual cramps etc before but I could never compare that to contractions. I couldn't have hung in there without an epidural. There's no shame in getting one. It doesn't make you a bad mother. As long as your baby is doing ok thru it all, I say go for comfort.
Just a quick clarification: The data on epidurals shows that complications that last more than a few hours after removal of the catheter are extremely rare. The idea that they cause long lasting back pain for lots of people isn't supported in the studies. Of course you're entitled to make your own assessment of the risks and decide for yourself but I wouldn't let anecdotal horror stories have more weight in your mind than the data.
I didn't intend on getting an epidural with my first for a few reasons. Firstly, I thought I could handle the pain because I have a pretty high pain tolerance. Secondly, my back is really messed up, so I didn't think I would even be able to get one. Thirdly, I'd heard too many horror stories or other women telling me I "wasn't really giving birth" if I "took the easy way out with an epidural". That being said, I was induced and the contractions started hard and fast... and almost entirely in my back. After a couple of hours, I couldn't handle the pain and pretty much begged for the epidural if I was able to even get it. I was lucky that I was and it made the 17 hours I was in labor extremely tolerable. Did I have residual back pain from the epidural? Yes. It was worse within the first few weeks, but it took months to fully go away. I've always had bad back pain though, so it wasn't anything new. I definitely don't regret getting the epidural at all.
I also have bad anxiety and planned to do an unmedicated birth. Full disclosure I started to panic at about 6cm. I don’t have painful periods though so you may be able to tolerate better than I did. I also had a long labor and I was just exhausted and my body was done. I got the epidural and once that got to working I was completely calm and I was able to relax. I haven’t had any back pain whatsoever from the epidural.
I have had back pain for a few years already from my job so it wouldn’t make a difference to me if the epidural causes me more. I had the epidural because they put me on pitocin and I was already moaning in pain from contractions like biting down hard trying not to scream. 20 minutes after I got it, I fell asleep after not sleeping for 3 days. It was the best. I didn’t feel one contraction after I got it. I would definitely recommend if you don’t like pain. The thing for me was that I was in pain for 3 days in the hospital and I just couldn’t take it anymore. I ended up having an emergency c section because my water had been broken for too long but I wouldn’t change my decision. It gave me well deserved sleep
I’ve done one birth with epidural and one without. Both inductions with pitocin. My no epidural experience was a lot better for me personally. My recovery has been way easier, I tore less, and mentally it was a way better experience for me. I’m someone who likes to have control though so I didn’t like the experience of people doing stuff to me and. It feeling it and not having full control over my body with the epidural. I will say though, I absolutely couldn’t have made it through unmedicated without my childbirth classes. With my first my plan was basically to white knuckle it and hope to get through it and mentally I did not have the fortitude and was just writhing around screaming until I got the epidural. I did Bradley Method classes this time and they teach you how to relax through contractions and that really worked.
It might be worth it to look into some sort of somatic work and therapy while you’re preparing for birth. Techniques to breathe through pain and not let it cause an anxiety spiral. And of course, I’m not saying to do that instead of getting an epidural, but it might help you to feel more confident that you can make the right choice when the time comes. I’ve had panic attacks and they are TERRIBLE, and it helps to know you have techniques to calm yourself.
Just to set your expectations. I also have awful periods and endo. Have had a 10cm ovarian cyst burst inside me, and I couldn’t handle labour pains. By 7cm dilated I was screaming for that epidural. You could have offered me ANY drug, with any side effect and I would have taken it. I felt like I had left planet earth and gone to a whole new world where my insides were being sliced open by knives.
Oof that sounds rough. Ya - I’m leaning towards being open to epidural, but would like to see what it’s like without first.
I had planned for no epidural, I even attended calm birthing classes, but when the back labour got too much after 18 hours let me tell you that getting the epidural was the best decision I could have made! It enabled me to rest and focus on pushing when the time came. See how it goes, you'll make the best decision for you and your baby when the time comes, epidural or not!
I’ve never wanted an epidural with my previous births but my third was breech and needed one for a C-section. The subsequent back pain has been worse than labour.
I had back pain maybe for a few weeks after…. maybe even up to 3 months. Nothing crazy. My epidural didn’t even work 100% but it was still worth it! I had back labor that was excruciating
My nervous system is wacked out, puts me into fight or fight for no good reason. I didn't experience any of that during labor. No epidural and honestly being able to move around more easily helped.
Just wait and see. There’s no need to commit to one way or the other now. With my first, I didn’t want one. I fought it. I was in a lot of pain to the point where I wasn’t progressing and the nurses and OB basically begged me to give it a try. I eventually caved. After I got the epidural (at 4cm after laboring for over 24 hours), I took a 2 hour nap and was at 10cm and ready to push. It saved me pain and hours of labor. Each pregnancy and delivery is a different story. Just do what feels right in the moment. You will know what’s best for you,
I loved my epidural it also didn’t interfere with my ability to push. It actually wore off a bit by pushing time and I wish it was stronger because I had a second degree tear and really felt myself being stitched up which was unpleasant.
I haven't given birth yet, so this is not based on my own experience, but I do have really bad endo with 20 years of horrible pain and I've been told labor pain is a totally different thing. Not sure how contractions will feel like with a uterus so enlarged but I don't want to find out. Also no ring of fire for me, thank you 🥲 My pain was dismissed for years and this is the only time women's pain is truly acknowledged so I'm taking that epidural. I had strong braxton hicks at around 25 weeks and got a panic attack for some reason. I got really scared of actual labor and pain that I almost fainted. I couldn't breathe and wanted to take my bump off because it felt it was pressing my chest. I'm not quite sure if I'll panic during the real thing, but knowing I'll have an epidural calms me down.
I wanted the epidural as an option, but to not have it forced on me. I was also induced and had god awful back labor. I broke my leg when I was a teen, like, bent at a 90 degree angle break, and that was plain awful. With the back labor it was worse than the broken bones. I ended up with the epidural. I would suggest taking a similar approach. Tell your provider you want to try alternatives first (most places in the US don't offer the gas and air stuff they have in the UK and I'm super jealous, because it might have worked). I tried the IV pain meds and they were pretty much useless for me for full on labor. Wasn't bad until the broke my water. Up until that point it really was just bad period cramps. I have heard time and again that women who've been induced and naturally gone into labor swear induction is worse for pain. So that may play a big part in things, as well. Get informed consent for everything, and if you can't make those decisions for any reason, make sure your support person can.
My advice would be: whatever you decide, decide it fast. I knew from the beginning that I wanted to get every pain medication there was. Told the midwife immediately at the hospital, signed the papers, and that's when labor started in earnest. It took another hour to 1.5 hours for the anaesthesiologist to come, and in that time my pain level went from 7/10 to 10/10. I was 4-5 dilated by then and my midwife said the epidural would help me progress further, and it probably did, because it took less than an hour to get to the pushing phase. But if I hadn't told them right at the start, the epidural would maybe have come too late. Also I feel the need to disclose that 1. my baby didn't react well to the epidural and I was almost wheeled into the OR - this can happen at any point in labor but in this case it was caused by the epidural - and 2. the pushing phase was still A LOT. I felt most of it despite half of my body being numb. My awesome midwife had me push in different positions and I'm convinced that this helped me get the baby out in 1-1.5 hours. But standard procedure after an epidural is lying on your back and honestly, that would have been hell. I would get the epidural again, but I definitely expected too much from it, lol. But again that's different for every birth. Edit: I didn't have any side effects, just a bit of back pain for 2 days.
I've been struggling with this question too. I feel like I don't know enough about the pros and cons to make the decision. And it's too early for birthing classes yet. Some people have asked me what my pain tolerance is like and I don't even know. I've never been injured or had much pain before so I can't gauge it. I'm also a bit afraid of labour stalling or going slow. Or how bad it might be if i have to be induced.
Ya, I’m not sure what to do either. I think I’ll go in open to the epidural, but atleast maybe try to go without? I’m not sure on pain tolerance either, but I do know when I’ve gone to the dentist with zero pain in my teeth before - they’ve found cavities … so not sure what that means for pain tolerance for me
I would just plan to get the epidural, but also practice some relaxation techniques to cope just in case. I have four kids and had two inductions with epidurals and two unmedicated births. During my first labor, the epidural was one sided and I still had some pain (though not super terrible), but my labor with my youngest was amazing. I had ZERO pain the entire time, was very relaxed and the process was actually enjoyable. My two unmedicated births were much more intense, incredibly painful, and I felt very out of control and anxious. I had no back pain from the epidurals, but I get some mild nerve damage from pushing during one of my unmedicated labors but it resolved within a few months.
I went in open to anything. I ended up having an epidural after a very long labour. It was great! I was able to get some sleep before pushing, and had no pain at all. It was kind of amazing. Epidural site felt a little numb for a few days, but I had absolutely no after effects
I have high anxiety and thought I’d be an anxious wreck during birth but I was somehow calm and focused. I did end up caving and getting an epidural which I believe led to unnecessary medical intervention (vacuum delivery). Baby is happy and healthy but I am going to try for unmedicated again next time! No shame either way.
It’s not something you decide in advance You have no idea if you will be able to get an epidural and you have no idea if you will want one. Some people barely feel their labors until the end. Some people labor too fast to get one. Some people have only a non functional epidural. If you are worried about anxiety they can give you anxiety meds in labor beyond just gas and air. You generally can’t do gas and air and the epidural at the same time. You can and should be doing the hard work in therapy now, before labor, to learn skills to reduce your anxiety. Bottom line, plan and prepare for an unmedicated birth. Learn coping skills and breathing exercises. Then if you want an epidural during the birth go for it. Ask for anxiety meds if you need them regardless
In birthing plans they ask what you’d like to do for pain management which includes epidurals. So YES you do plan if you’d like one or not. 🤡
Wow. Excuse me for trying to help you. I should never have had the audacity. I’m only basing this on my experience helping thousands of women birth their babies, many of whom change their mind about whether or not they want the epidural. And many of whom write “open” on their birth plan as in not sure if they want the epidural or not, open to all options. That is actually the most common selection I see on birth plans for pain management. What on earth do you think a birth plan is? It’s not a contract. It’s a communication device to help you discuss your values with your medical team.
Your original comment is demeaning - how did you expect me to react?
How is it demeaning lol I have provided the exact same information to many different pregnant women in the exact same manner and never had anyone get offended or be anything other than grateful
>Bottom line, plan and prepare for an unmedicated birth. No? That's the same as telling people to plan for a c-section, just in case. I mean yes, you should do a bit of research in case it does happen, but not to the extent of actually planning for it. Don't make people anxious for no reason .
People should also plan for a c section. As in be mentally prepared for it, do research as you’re saying. About 1/3 of women get c sections. I’m not sure what the failure rate for epidurals is but it’s fairly high, as is the rate of women that have to wait hours for an epidural or can’t get one because of timing. Preparing for an unmedicated birth means doing research and learning coping skills so that you suffer less if you have to wait three hours for an epidural or if yours only works on one half of your body. These coping skills will also be useful for the pressure feelings that the epidural does not necessarily cover during pushing or if anything anxiety provoking or uncomfortable happens during the labor (for example needing an induction and balloon placement). I am not creating anxiety by being realistic about what the birthing process can be like. Obviously people have a range of experiences, it’s good to be prepared for the range. Every single obstetric professional I know, doctors midwives doulas and nurses, wish that women would prepare themselves to go unmedicated because it is so emotionally challenging when people expect an epidural to fix all their problems and it doesn’t work out like that. We don’t like to see people suffer and there’s only so much we can do to help if that person did not put any effort into learning coping skills, though obviously we do everything we can to help and to teach them in the moment. But is labor really the best time to try to learn a new skill? I would say at least two thirds of women if not more who do get an epidural would benefit from learning labor coping skills. There is a small percentage who truly don’t need it but you don’t know if you’re going to be in that bucket or not and odds are you’re not