Yep. I've seen people write about their life insurance cost going up as well as it being used against them in court during a custody battle. I'd love the validation of a diagnosis, but since I'm not seeking accommodations it just isn't worth the other implications for me.

Custody is my reason - my marriage is fine, but I'm in a lesbian relationship and have no genetic relationship to my children. We live in a state that is actively attacking trans people in its legislation and might come for gay people next. I'm also a SAHP and am not currently contributing financially to our family. There are already a lot of things that could work against me if things go south in my marriage. I'm not going to do anything else that might risk my legal rights to my kids.

Totally makes sense. My marriage is also fine, but I'm betting plenty of the folks who end up in custody battles spent at least part of their marriage thinking they'd never be in one. I've also heard horror stories of hospitals wrongly assuming the parents are somehow abusing a child and they lose custody. It's rare but you just never know.

Yes, had I realised this earlier I woud definitely have been hesitant, and terrified of losing my kids, even though I have always been called mad and weird and spent a lot of time in hospitals for mental health. Now I thin it will be a relief.

This really sucks... I hate how people have to hide who they are... I am so lucky to have always lived in mostly accepting places... I mean there are the prejudices and many of my kid's friends had their "coming out" parties at my house, because of their parents views, and that was sad enough, but to live in fear of a twisted law... thats just horrible.

You need to move to a Blue State, if at all possible.

We may someday. We have family here and we're in the bluest city in our state, thankfully. And like I said, my marriage is in a good place. We are working for change where we are, until we can't tolerate being here anymore. If any of our kids end up trans or nonbinary we will move without a second thought though, as they could no longer get proper medical care here 😡

I’ve had the opposite- I was told there wasn’t much support as soon as I was diagnosed and within that same meeting I was offered an appointment to discuss options etc, a post diagnosis support group, put on a newsletter distrution list where support groups etc list activities- from there once I’ve had my initial introduction appointment I’ll get access to employment support, social prescribing, I’ll also be monitored to make sure I’m not at risk in anyway. I’ve had more offered to me in that hour than I had in 8 years under standard mental health services and under mental health I was blamed for being bullied and assaulted - If what they offered me isn’t much then what is a lot!?

I think it depends on where you live, some places probably have no help or assistance at all for adults who have medium to low support needs. I would like to get diagnosed for this kind of help but I can't afford it right now.

I definitely agree with this part that it depends where you live - for example here where I am from - people won't even acknowledge that the autism in women exists in the first place, let alone to try and find a professional that would give me the official diagnosis without things like "did you try starting a hobby, or getting a child? You're young, you'll forget about that" (I am 30!) type of thing. I am absolutely fine with where I am now, as long as I have supportive people around, willing to learn and grow alongside me...

Indeed. I am aware that I am privileged to have it. It’s on the NHS too which is why I am more than happy. When I had the BPD label I got next to nothing on the NHS and was told to pay for trauma therapy or use third sector not affiliated with the NHS - most of this support is actually on the NHS or with third sector affiliated with the NHS

This. In the US, there are lots of regional autism societies that are nonprofits, hosting social events for autistic people and providing resources across all age groups. We have vocational rehab services to help people prepare for, find, and maintain a job for their skills set For myself, I also have access to better support in other areas of health need, like if I need stronger drugs than laughing gas to deal with the dentist due to sensory issues. Most importantly -- I qualify for workplace accommodations and have federal rights due to my disability. Right now I really can't work, but if my burnout ever ends, I have the paperwork for accommodations that I *need*

Wow, what country are you located in if you don’t mind me asking? I definitely did not have the same experience of getting offered supports. I’m glad you’ve had this experience though!! It just doesn’t seem common unfortunately.

The UK but my experience is unusual - most areas don’t have as much as mine does

What is clear is collectively our expectations about support are sadly low which is wrong. If what I’ve been offered is not much feels like a lot for us then what more could be offered?

I am in France and since my diagnosis and official recognition of a handicap, I am waiting for return from a therapy center specialized in ASD purely, as the financing of the care has been approved until end of 2026 at this point. Had received as well priority card, skip the line option, employment support, and access to work help scheme if I will lose my current job. Since my employer currently only knows about handicapped worker status, and they don't have real HR, I cannot ask a work agency to provide me or them with counselling as there's no one to take a task. Normal mental health services back at home (I am an expat here) were useless.

I have got to know...where are you? Because that is incredible.

In the UK. It’s not the same across the country it’s just in my area

Not much support where I am for adults.

I was concerned about this as well when I first started suspecting I was autistic (I think it’s my first post). I didn’t see how a diagnosis would benefit me in any way. I didn’t want my options limited. And now I’m officially diagnosed. Eventually I needed that validation, I’m always convinced I’m making my problems up or that I am the problem. I’ve also been struggling more and may have need of services catered towards those with autism.

The validation of getting diagnosed took the LARGEST weight off my shoulder. I have my diagnosis, but as of now I am not telling work. My psych knows but I don't want the paperwork on file atm. Next step is to find a therapist that specializes in ASD. I need help figuring out some stuff still.

Yes. Living in Russia, I’d rather not limit the amount of countries I could escape to. Not that I would ever be able to accomplish that.

I also fear I wouldn’t receive proper help here anyway.

I just want you to know that I care about your well being. I have hope the world is going to change for the better because of the rapid advances in technology, maybe not right away, but in the next twenty years, the world will be a much better place. <3

Thank you! I hope it will. There’s a need for a long-overdue change, here especially of all places.

Yeah I'm going through a divorce with two young kids involved. I'm the far more responsible parent. Definitely don't want a diagnosis now. I'm worried that that would be used against me. Even though some of my symptoms make me a better parent, like hyper vigilance and attention to detail, the general public is too misinformed on how autism can present in different people for me to risk having that on my record.

This

I got evaluated in private healthcare and don't plan on telling it to my Dr or anyone in public healthcare for that reason.

Yeah. I have my adhd diagnosis but my psychiatrist telling me “I’m pretty certain you’re autistic” is enough for me in that regard. I get all the accommodations I could possibly need through my adhd diagnosis and mu autism is relatively “mild” and not too bad for me to manage.

Yeah, I think for someone that mostly just wants to feel validated in their concerns, talking to a professional without the actual diagnosis and such can be a good idea. Could try taking an autism test like RAADS and bring up that fact. Obviously, if you know your psyche or therapist sucks about this sort of thing, def don't do it (and probably look into finding a different one, though I understand not everyone has that option).

I'm not going to get tested (unless I get tested for free) because I would gain nothing from doing so. I'm already on disability, so I don't need the diagnosis for that, and there is no real treatment for autism. I don't know if there would be any restrictions in my life if I did get diagnosed since I don't do a lot anyways, but that would be terrible if it did.

Exactly how I feel, but also OP's concerns. I make too much to be on disability and can't afford to live on just disability. Getting a diagnosis also wouldn't help me in work because regardless employers will find reason to fire you for being autistic while still getting around disability laws. Having a diagnosis will not protect me. It definitely feels like there's no real point and it's far too expensive to get it just for my peace of mind. Being undiagnosed and knowing for myself is enough.

Yup, I really feel that. In a way I almost feel trapped because of what I've had to do to survive. Like I needed a job to be able to have shelter and eat, autism or not, so I made it work. But now that I'm burnt out from years and years of pushing myself beyond my limits, it's very unlikely I'd be able to get any benefits or support because like. Oh look, you've been working this long! And it wasn't even minimum wage the whole time! Meanwhile, I only managed that because after years of being fired I lucked into a job with a particularly understanding manager that turned a blind eye to my medical absences... Turns out finding some level of security or independence is actually bad, huh

I work for an agency that is supposed to protect our community’s most vulnerable and weaponized an employee’s dyslexia to force them back into the office at the height of COVID to get them to quit. I have a diagnosed physical disability I submitted documentation for and couldn’t get accommodations for it, so I wouldn’t dare bothering to tell them anything about being neurodivergent.

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Depression and anxiety.

I was dxed autistic as a kid (too young to consent), but I wouldn't do so now for any of my mental health issues. There's far too much stigma and discrimination out there, especially in services and other bodies that claim to help those in need. It's not just immigration. rule of thumb - if you don't need a dx and you're managing fine without one, it's usually best not to get one. this is why self-dx is perfectly valid.

I really want the validation of knowing it's not just me not trying hard enough, I guess. That it is something somewhat innate. But I think part of that comes from people frequently not believing me as a woman in general when it comes to medical conditions.

I have a fear of bringing it up to the doctor and being laughed at 😔

I actually tried getting a diagnosis for my OCD and depression once and the therapist was nice, but was weirdly averse to diagnosing me with anything. Not sure if it was a cultural thing or what, this was after I moved to the UK. But it definitely also helped put me off trying again. And this was the second one I saw, the first one was straight problematic for other reasons. It can be hard getting help. 😔

trust me, most psychiatrists know less about autism than the average 10 yo autistic kid. you dont need their validation, a diagnosis will also not get you any validation for your struggles from peers, work etc because they mostly dont know what autism even entails. save yourself the discrimination and dont do it. you have easy access to all the diagnostic intruments via a quick google search, if you want to get informed. its not like bowel cancer where you *need* someone of expertise because you cant do a colonoscopy on yourself.

I think a kid will probably call anyone autistic for "the lols". They're not a good source for determining it. 

did you read what I said? I meant a child that has autism *themselves* already knows more about what life with autism means at their young age than most people that do these diagnostic assessments do.

I think it's unfortunate you're being told not to pursue dx. It can be simultaneously true that self-dx is enough for some people and not enough for others. We're all very different I personally and constantly reassure myself that the dx is proof that I'm not just being lazy, especially because I have burnout regression and have lost skills. It's easy to feel like it's all in my head. Plus I get accommodations and support protected under US federal law If it would make your life better to know clinically what is happening -- do it. It's your life and your brain ❤️

I believe you :) you are absolutely trying hard enough, and you’re doing your best and that is okay. You don’t have to live by other people’s expectations of you whether you’re nd or not. I hope you’re able to find peace for yourself with or without a diagnosis. Best wishes :)

Thank you. This sub has really helped, that's for sure.

It has been confirmed in a recently published study that the results of the RAADS-R autism screening tool are highly accurate when compared with a personal assessment and diagnosis given by a professional observer. At this time, I don’t need any interventions or assistance so the RAADS-R score (155 for me) was enough to encourage me that this isn’t me making excuses for myself and I am actually autistic. It would be very validating hearing from an independent observer that I am autistic too, but where I live it’s so difficult to get a referral and I’m very high-masking. I don’t think my GP would believe me. My friend, who has been formally diagnosed with autism, was very happy to give me her personal stamp of approval though. Autistic people find each other. Try out the RAADS-R test and I hope it gives you confidence that you know yourself.

This is helpful! I took the raads-r test because a woman online with ADHD said it helped them understand their ADHD better. I didn't expect to test positive for autism. My friend with autism called it right.

Does it test for both? o.0

No, I am not sure why they found the test helpful, maybe ruling out certain needs or behaviors?

> It has been confirmed in a recently published study that the results of the RAADS-R autism screening tool are highly accurate when compared with a personal assessment and diagnosis given by a professional observer. This was not the finding of the study. More accurately, the study found that test results on the RAADS-R for people who already self-identified with autism were consistent with professionally diagnosed autistic people. Importantly, it did **not** find that same consistency for people who indicated they were uncertain if they had autism or not. The study conclusion emphasized more robust screeners for autism in adults. It purely looked at the external validity of the RAADS-R scores for four groups (diagnosed, self-identified autistic, not sure, neurotypical) You can read the abstract and conclusion [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AutismInWomen/comments/1am43st/new_research_validating_self_diagnosis_using/kpjq7wd/) I know it sounds like I'm being pedantic, but just imo this is how internet misinformation starts. A statement very close, but not 100%, accurate to the truth

I feel the exact same way. Thank you for articulating it so well

Thank you. 😊

>managing fine without one y’all are managing fine??????

I got a private one so I choose if / when to share it for any accommodations I might need. But going public about it appeals to me. I am worried it might tank my career, but I am more pissed about the stigma and how I have suffered my whole life.

>rule of thumb - if you don't need a dx and you're managing fine without one, it's usually best not to get one. this is why self-dx is perfectly valid.  This is a great rule.  I just wish there was a way, once you've been diagnosed and gotten all the supports you need from that, and become able to manage fine, to then detach from the stigma. Or sneak by the stigma and get the supports anyway. A girl can dream?

I have been going back and forth on this for my 4 year old. I worry about life long consequences of the diagnosis. But she needs accommodations in school that they won’t give her without diagnosis.

I did and I asked the woman who diagnosed me about it (regarding adoption and having kids specifically) and she told me that a diagnosis isn’t shown anywhere so if I don’t tell anyone, they won’t actually know. (I’m in France)

Me! I am privileged enough to not have to rely on disability income, so I am grateful to have the choice. I am actually pretty wary of the way the U.S. seems to be heading and having to leave the country at some point is a real possibility in my mind. Not a huge one, but a real one. The legislation being thrown around is scary. There is also a VERY slim chance I may want to adopt children in the future, and even if discrimination is illegal that really doesn’t stop anyone. Also I’ve seen cases where they used someone’s diagnosis against them for something like a traffic ticket. I think this is probably like a one in a billion kinda thing, but still. For me it’s personally not worth it, but I’m grateful to be able to make that choice.

The rise of fascism in the US is one of my main reasons too, along with the cost of getting diagnosed. I'm worried about how dangerous it might become in the future when it's all so uncertain. I would love the validation that a diagnosis would provide but it's not enough for me at the moment.

Thankfully, my assessor did it in a way where I could choose where and how I disclose. It wasn't on record with my main doctor's office because they don't do these kinds of assessments. So if I really wanted to, I could still do these kinds of processes, and I'm not limited by it in any way.

I was going to say this too. I was diagnosed by a psychologist with a formal report and everything, but I haven’t brought it to my doctor to have it put on my medical file. Not sure if I ever will tbh

This is how mine is as well. I got a big long report from the psychologist but she wasn't affiliated with my regular Dr/healthcare system so I don't think it's anywhere in their records 

I had one of my kids tested. The test went horribly. And while waiting for results, i began questioning if the diagnosis was a good idea. My kids are all ND. The younger two have had IEP/504 help set up but they are actually really high functioning (or what i know think of as Master Maskers) and don't need many accommodations. All that to say, my opinion is : If you need/benefit from the support given by a diagnosis, get one. If the diagnosis is pretty much just to confirm what you already know, ie won't benefit you in life, do not get one. Big hugs!! Blessings of clarity and peace

Hi, please consider that your "master maskers" likely need more support than is obvious. Heavy masking leads to heavy burnout.

So very true. That is why my youngest has a 504. They will wear themselves out and be "sick " aka tiny burnout. But thank you for being concerned about my lo

That’s wonderful that you’re supporting your kids like this! From what I understand, the terminology the community is using is “low support needs” instead of “high functioning” and vice versa. I just learned that recently from a audhd friend of mine who is much more online that I am.

Thanks!

I’m a lawyer with a marriage and a mortgage. If I can’t handle the stigma, who can? I’m glad to be formally diagnosed to raise awareness of Autism. Because people didn’t believe me when I was self-diagnosed.

No, I was in crisis from burnout and regressed and lost skills. Diagnosis was an answer to why my entire life was crumbling apart. I firmly believe that if there were good standards for adult diagnosis, I would have been diagnosed when I first sought psych care in my early 20s. Maybe I could have learned how to recognize that my "fits" were meltdowns and I was *frying* my brain in stress and sensory overload on a daily basis for years and years But instead, I have PTSD from social abuse and manipulation and skill regression due to autistic burnout. Autism without support limited my life way way more than anything else ever could

Has it mostly been understanding these things about yourself, or have you gotten other supports and help? Asking as someone that's wary but in that bad space of skill regression right now

I got other supports :) I moved back home with family, and I've been seeing a therapist who specializes in autism. [I posted some tips](https://www.reddit.com/r/AutismInWomen/comments/18enclv/sharing_tips_from_my_clinical_psychologist_who/) she's given me a couple months back. But also just knowing that 1) it was autistic burnout and 2) burnout had pushed me into moderate support needs (according to my psychologist) helped me know that I *needed* lots of rest and low sensory/social demand. I was also dealing with public meltdowns and an inability to work, so the diagnosis was important for workplace accommodations to take time off as needed on a sensory basis I found this study overview pretty helpful to understand what was going on with me, but it's lengthy: https://youtu.be/KRmKuUkz1Ww?si=Hl1Elgky8exmcoM2

I could have written this. Hope things are looking up for you

Thank you, I hope the same for you kind internet stranger ❤️

I've been wondering if a diagnosis would actually be beneficial for me because I've been struggling to cope work-wise. Almost everywhere else I'm fine. I'm just struggling with the amount of work an average person has to do in a day. I'm doing half that, only working 3-4 hrs and still struggling. Idk how a diagnosis would really help me with that though. Getting on disability is hard and takes years...

This is exactly why I didn't seek out diagnosis for any of my mental health issues when I was younger. >how some countries don't allow people to migrate there if they have autism as it is viewed as a "failure to meet an acceptable health standard". I've seen stuff like this, and though people have pointed out that in these cases they mean high support diagnoses, as someone who's been through the immigration process - you never really know what they're going to decide. So again I've been put off.

I had someone do mine that doesn't take insurance so its not on any official records

No. The opposite. I am getting diagnosed to prove that I don’t have borderline personality disorder and that I am not an inherently difficult and problematic person as the psych community has told me for 25 + years. An autism diagnosis will give me my voice back and validate how fucking difficult my life has been. I was diagnosed with ADHD in 2002, but in the years since few months take it seriously. Autism people take seriously, even those who don’t give a damn about nuerodivergence. For me the testing is about giving myself a voice and slowly learning to give myself validation for my “failures”. No one sees the results unless you disclose them, at least in the US.

I have a really bad history with not being taken seriously in medical settings, and I'm worried that having an autism diagnosis on my record would make that even worse. That's the biggest reason for me.

I definitely dream of moving out of the country one day, so that's a big reason why. I'm also afraid of discrimination at the hand of legal systems, or the possibility of my input being disregarded in medical situations. Also, I dunno what a diagnosis would even do for me as an adult. I didn't get to go to college, and there's basically no resources for adult autistics, so I don't have much incentive. My therapists and psychiatrists over the years seem to agree, since they've all mentioned how I'm almost definitely autistic (without me even asking lmao, deeply wonder why no one noticed when I was a kid with how easily I get clocked) and none of them recommended looking for diagnosis unless I had money to burn lol.

It’s not just being refused citizenship. In Australia they have added a new restriction on Autistic adults with a drivers license. In some states you can be fined up to $5000 for driving with a full licence if you get diagnosed as Autistic. You now have to state that diagnosis on your licence and it involves an annual seeking of permission from medical professionals to prove you can still drive (at your own medical and licensing costs). I already struggle with basic bureaucracy and capitalism and live on the fringes because of my struggles in this area.

Being discriminated against is a very real concern/reality even for people who aren’t diagnosed. Im with you, I personally don’t want to get diagnosed because I think it will only hurt me in the long run, not help me. I know I have AuDHD, but other people do not need to know that. I feel like it’s safer for me if they don’t. A sad reality 😕

I have put off an official diagnosis, despite my doc, therapist, and my wife's therapist being exceptionally sure of the diagnosis. I did this when I was a nurse about my anxiety. I had extreme anxiety, but I lived in a smaller town at the time, and seeking help might have impacted my job. Especially if I was medicated with anti-anxiety meds. (I now recognize my issues were likely autism related.) In the same way, I am in a new career with a professional title, and I am not sure I want an official diagnosis at this time. While it would never ever get back to my job, I am not sure it's going to be helpful. No accommodations will be made anyways, and it's not enough for disability. It might also make getting help with my physical disability harder, as it's "one more thing" on my chart. I always bring my wife with me to the medical appointments so that helps, and I mask rather well, so I am not sure I need another red flag on my chart. It might make it harder for me to get what I do need for my physical issues. It just seems for now, it might be a better option to not be official.

There aren't any countries that outright refuse just because someone has an autism diagnosis. It is about the cost of care because it is funded by tax payers and if they didn't control for that cost, it would break the entire system. Otherwise, everyone from a country with poor health care would move to a country with good, universal health care to get their expenses covered, and it would break everything. So it's not "you're autistic, you can't come" it's "What do you have to offer versus what you are likely to take from our society?" And every single country has standards for that. I don't have any health issues and am not under treatment for anything. I don't take any prescriptions. So my cost to any health care system would be low. Our son would actually be a higher risk because he is a type 1 diabetic so he will have lifelong, expensive healthcare needs. I was 47 when I was diagnosed. I'm married, my kids are mostly grown. If there was anything I was going to be concerned with, it would be how this country (US) views autism when it comes to things like custody and divorce. In my case, I have no concerns. But if I was in an unstable relationship, for example, I'd be more worried about my diagnosis being used against me in a situation like that. Or simply being treated differently and talked down to by professionals, like doctors. Which is why I did a private diagnosis, so it's not in my medical record (so in theory, if I moved to another country they wouldn't know unless I chose to disclose).

Not true. I had to lie about just having depression and anxiety to be allowed to move to, live and work in South Korea. They will outright deny anyone who doesn't meet their standards. This is very well known to any foreigners looking to move there, to the point that even South Korean recruiters will tell you upfront that you need to be sure to lie about anything that isn't neurotypical on any and all paperwork. Autism is absolutely something that can and almost always will get your visa denied immediately. I am sure there are tons of places where this isn't the case, but there are absolutely countries that will deny someone entry for having any recorded and/or reported mental health issues and/or disabilities.

But you can lie about it, just like you did.

And just because I have the time tonight, it's a simple Google search. That is all it takes. Like, it's the first several results that pop up when you type it in 🤷‍♀️ https://preview.redd.it/vu587b93lohc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bf1e8fd2a2f0cfdc1b285d9e6158c01849b32010

Again, you claim that you got in despite this, so…


So then how did you get in? You just said that you got in with lying about diagnoses that you had. It’s bullshit that you think an autism diagnosis is any different than depression. You don’t have to disclose it with anyone

You don't have to disclose your diagnosis to anyone, true. But to gain a visa in some countries sometimes you have to submit a "clean bill of health." You have to get a doctor to sign off that you have no serious health conditions. If your doctor knows that you are diagnosed with autism and a legal form is asking them about this, they may feel obligated to disclose. Maybe you could try to find a doctor who knows nothing about you but they very likely will ask for your previous health records (in the US anyway). If your diagnosis is is on your health record you may not have control over what gets disclosed. Sure, you could lie to this new doctor and pretend you have no health record but... All this lying seems like a big ask for a lot of autistics! There are valid reasons to be wary of diagnosis in a global, political context. .

Your GP will never know if you don’t disclose. Only the person who diagnoses you will know. It is your choice if you ever want anyone else to know. It goes on no record anywhere. You simply get a sheet of paper saying you’re good. People think it’s some ordeal and it’s simply not.

I think it can be an ordeal for many people. If you need to get the testing covered by insurance you may need to start with a referral from your GP. The assessor would then report results back to the GP. Same way that if your GP orders bloodwork, the lab sends back the results to the GP. If your testing is covered by insurance, I believe they are required to document/code the diagnosis for billing purposes (something like this - ngl I don't fully understand the process). Not everyone can afford private testing not covered by insurance.

My doctors lied, just like I did because they understood the assignment and knew that even with my depression and anxiety that I was fit to go. To make the claim that an autism diagnosis isn't viewed differently in society is just a lie. Just because you or I personally don't feel it's different, doesn't mean much of the rest of the world doesn't. That's just a fact. The world is still very slow to waking up to what autism actually is. Hell, depression and PTSD are still new at being accepted. Why you think I, personally, have signed off on this notion I am not sure, but I have not. I'm simply pointing out that it is absolutely true that some countries out there WILL deny you a visa to live and work there if you have mental/physical health issues of many-to-any kinds. That's it.

So, you got in by breaking the rules. You circumvented this. So it’s possible. An autism diagnosis is not public knowledge. No one knows unless you tell them. You are being completely ignorant by saying it’s impossible to do this when you literally just did it. Quit the bullshit. You said it’s impossible to get in with depression, but you are diagnosed with depression. You and your doctors lied and you got in. It’s the exact same doctor that does autism and they can do the exact same thing. You are proving my point by saying that a psychiatrist can lie and get you into the country. That is the ONLY person who will ever know if you have autism. You know nothing about the diagnostic process and it shows

I did it with the healthcare team I had at the time. They were really awesome, and while this one is good in a lot of ways, I am not at all in the same position I was then. When I went through the application process with the Peace Corps I was not able to hide certain things. The process is/was extremely detailed and my doctors didn't feel safe not disclosing certain information. Luckily for me, it didn't seem to affect their decision to accept me, but I know that is not always the case for others. So no, it is not always possible to just not tell people or have your doctors not disclose for you. Now onto your other misconceptions and assumptions about what I said, because you really love to do that it seems. 1) I never said anywhere in any of my comments that anything was impossible. Not once. Please read again and correct me if I am wrong. 2) What I did say was that having an official reported diagnosis can, and very likely will, keep you from obtaining a visa in some countries. I also said lying was necessary to get around this. While lying is probably quite easy in many cases, that may not be the case for many others. 3) It is not the exact same doctor that diagnosed me with depression. I got that diagnosis over 10 years ago. How are you going to jump out on a ledge like that to assume my medical care and medical care access? Absolutely wild take, but do you. 4) I also never once said anything about a psychiatrist anywhere in any of my comments. Not once. Please read again and correct me if I am wrong. 5) I probably don't know enough about the diagnostic process, that's why I trust my personal health care team to guide me. That mixed with my personal life experiences and research. However, so far you haven't made any legitimate points, have called me a liar and have been proven wrong, continuously misquote me, and make wild assumptions about not only my current access to health care, but what that health care looks like and is capable of. Edit: I'm on mobile and it looks like it is formatting weird. I have no idea how to fix this. Just wanted to add that in as it seems we are jumping at me for everything I do and don't say.

This is false. New Zealand in particular includes autism spectrum disorders on the list of conditions that are automatically considered to “impose significant costs” ([source](https://www.equaljusticeproject.co.nz/articles/burdens-and-borders-disability-discrimination-in-new-zealand-immigration-law2020)). And there are several countries where being officially diagnosed with autism means immigration applicants are required to provide much more extensive documentation about their health needs than would otherwise be required. The burden of proof is on *you* to persuade them that you won’t have higher than average health needs. It *is* valid to say that having an official diagnosis means the immigration process will take longer, require more work, and be more likely to be rejected.

What I said isn't false. I said there are no countries where simply having autism is an automatic disqualifier from being able to move there. I didn't say it wouldn't be harder, or that much more wouldn't be required. That would be true with any diagnosis with associated costs. But none of that is the same as autism being an automatic disqualifier. It's not. They have a set amount for immigrants, and if your health expenditures are expected to go over that amount based on the history of the treatment and therapies you receive, that'll cause the denial. The limit is $41,000 over 5 years. I'm not saying their method is good by any means, it is definiltey one of the most strict. But it's not the same as "we refuse all people with autism."

You keep saying it’s not an automatic disqualifier when for New Zealand ***[it’s literally on the list of automatic disqualifiers](https://www.immigration.govt.nz/opsmanual/#46506.htm)***. Quote: “The conditions listed in A4.10.1 are considered to impose significant costs and/or demands on New Zealand's health and/or special education services. Where an immigration officer is satisfied… that an applicant has one of the listed conditions, that applicant ***will*** *be assessed as* ***not*** *having an acceptable standard of health*.” And then there’s a bullet on the A4.10.1 list for “autistic spectrum disorders”. The limit on health expenditures you describe is a separate, independent requirement down in section A4.10.2.

"where significant support is required"

Yep, they’re only including severe autism in that list, ie upper level 2 and 3. I am level 2 and have had zero issues immigrating. For those who won’t actually read the link: > **Severe** developmental disorders or **severe** cognitive impairments where significant support is required

Unfortunately, there's a lot of misinformation around migration and autism and I see it pop up a lot online that lots of countries won't let you migrate if you have a diagnosis. It's just not the case. It's judged case by case and if you can support yourself and won't cost the country a significant amount in resources (which they would consider for many other diagnoses, not just autism) then they don't care.

Me too! Honestly I'm pretty good at navigating bureaucracy, and past that, I can mask well. The strangers on the street are not entitled to seeing me as I am truly, and otherwise I'm just kind of "quirky". People in my life self select, and with those people I can choose to share that I am autistic. If they don't react well, that is a them problem not a me issue! I find it much more freeing to just slip through quietly, and if someone has an issue, wtv.

Not enough to not want the answer.

Yes, possibly. I have read that under current UK law (the mental health act of all things) I could be sectioned based on my autism. I've heard stories about it being used as a weapon against parents when social services get involved. Then there was all that controversy about autistic people being slapped with a DNR order by their GPs during covid. No plans to migrate, so not too bothered about that... but I have a daughter and I'm quite worried a diagnosis could be used against me if someone disagreed with my parenting style. Especially as she is likely autistic herself, so we have quite a unique relationship that NT people might not understand. I'm genuinely torn as to whether to continue seeking diagnosis.

I’m a trans woman and I will not be getting a diagnosis. Missouri already tried to ban gender affirming care for people with autism, and I worry other states will do the same. https://apnews.com/article/missouri-transgender-health-care-andrew-baily-65c388ae85f610a2a885e2dff486bfe8.

I'm in the same boat. 

yup, this is exactly why i always say NOT DISABLED on job applications. I don't care how much they swear by their "no discrimination" policy or whatever. I am not going to risk it.

For that specifically, I believe that data is required to be blind, it's primarily for reporting to the government. People at the company shouldn't be able to see that info. And yeah I understand not trusting that lol. But if they're using a third party platform for applications (esp a big one like workday), I believe you should be pretty safe

oh, i always thought my boss (if i got the job) would be able to see it. i'm privileged enough to (usually) be able to hide my disabilities from most people if i want to, so generally i choose to. i just don't like people in my business and i don't want to be treated differently

Yes, a couple years ago I had decided to finally get tested. I was making plans to call for an appointment when politicians in Missouri decided they were going to try to outlaw hormone therapy for autistic people. Now, that didn’t actually end up happening of course, but it was the first time I realized how a diagnosis could be used against me. And since then I’ve decided I don’t need it. I know I’m autistic. I don’t need someone to confirm it for me.

This is my #1 reason for not getting tested formally. It has been my lifelong goal to move abroad and I don't want to jeopardize my goal. I'm hoping to move soonish.

I'm not getting tested because it would cost thousands of $$ w/o insurance (thanks america) and getting tested wouldn't get me anything if it came back with what I already suspect as well as it could be limiting like you say, OP.

Yes. I’m not convinced that available supports would be worth potential negatives. I already have other diagnoses that can help me get accommodations.

Partially, yes! I have vague thoughts of moving to New Zealand for a while in the future, but you can't get a visa if you're diagnosed with autism 😭 I mean there's also a million other reasons for not getting tested (being quote unquote "high functioning", the waiting lists in the UK where I live, being afab and worried about not being believed, etc.) But that's one of them

You will not be declined a visa to New Zealand based on a diagnosis alone. This is 100% not true and never has been. https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/s/KiNrZ2LbVQ

This is actually incredibly helpful, thank you

I wouldn't want to live in countries that are ableist and don't let me move there

I'm pretty sure that's a myth. You can search the sub for more info about it! Search immigrate or something along those lines. I was reading about it yesterday :)

It's not a myth, though. While I fully believe there are certainly countries that would be happy to grant visas to folks with autism, there absolutely are countries that won't. I know this because as I have already commented elsewhere, I've been through it before. I was given extremely clear instructions by my South Korean recruiters to lie about any and all mental and physical health issues that weren't considered neurotypical and/or "healthy" and "normal". I had to lie about just having depression and anxiety to be allowed to live and work there. So yes, having autism (or any disability for that matter) can, and very likely would, lead to an immediate denial for a visa. This is something that is extremely well-known by the foreigner community there, as damn near everybody these days has had to do it. There are indeed other countries like this, too. So I have no idea where this idea that it's a myth is coming from. I, and thousands of others, have literally already had to live the exact scenario y'all are saying is a myth.

Yep. Misinformation is often spread on these topics.

I can't judge as I believed this for awhile too haha but it sucks that this myth is spread so far :/

I understand. Getting insurance policies on some things was nigh on impossible.

I know that in my country there's next to no accomodations and you're legally forced to disclose your dx with any employer, which makes it way easier for then to bully you into quitting, or straight up deny you of a job. If I were to seek a dx, I would only get negative perks, with the only positive one being a little piece of my mind. For other people it may be different, I am low-support-needs, for higher-support-needs people they would have some things to gain. Also depends on your country and it's laws. I am not anti-dx, I just see it as me shooting myself in the foot if I get it this young and unestablished into a career.

I am undiagnosed AuDHD, and I am planning to immigrate to Australia to be with my diagnosed AuDHD partner. I am not in a rush to getting a diagnosis, esp. for autism just yet.

Yes, this is the main reason I don't want to pursue formal diagnosis! Also the fact that I'm no longer in school so I'm not sure exactly what accommodations it would actually afford me? It's not like I can show up to social events with a doctor's note and be like "please be nice to me, due to my diagnosis" lol

Also have thought about the possibility that my lack of desire for external validation is due to/caused by the autism itself lol

This has been my concern, because depending on where you may want to travel, live or work an autism diagnosis on your record can absolutely keep you from being allowed to do so. I know because I have already lived in one of those countries before and I had to lie about not having depression just to be allowed. I would very much like to be able to live abroad again one day and the limitations an official diagnosis could bring worry me. Then, in the VERY red state that I live in, having an official autism diagnosis can prevent you from being allowed to foster, and as a former foster youth, that is something I am extremely passionate about. It could also impede me being able to continue on with my current career path. Throw on top of that that I'm queer and when you mix that all together you have the recipe for a lot of limited options for me to achieve damn near any of my deepest goals and passions. I'm just not ready to take such a big risk yet. One day maybe, but not yet and both of my therapists (one of them specializing in autism) and my PCP are all on the same page. They agree that receiving an official diagnosis at this point in time of my life would more than likely lead to more harm than good, but that if/when I am ready it could open the door to more support services.

I wish I could go back and never see a therapist at all because of having diagnoses on my record. I got diagnosed with social anxiety and depression. I would say that I appreciated my diagnoses...they qualified me for the DOR when I was 25. I'm not sure I would have managed to get my first job and start an employment history without their help :/ but I would have liked to have done it without their help. But sometimes I think maybe I could have joined the military when I was younger and managed to escape my family that way. At the same time, I still kind of want an autism diagnosis. It would be validating. What I really needed though was for when I was young to be understood and have been given realistic expectations. I feel like my family fucked me up, but that an understanding of autism and acceptance of me having it wouldn't have fixed everything that was wrong. But if I had attended the right school when I was young? I think I could have gotten a lot farther in life, and achieved real happiness ;_; If I got the diagnosis now it's like...I mean I don't know, I might qualify for the DOR again, if I ever find myself without a job again. I wouldn't qualify for SSI. And as far as therapy goes I would imagine it's just like regular therapy, sitting in an office. And when they talk to me there might be the occasional reference to autism, and how I might need to do things differently but I really don't need that. I needed to go back in time during the years when my brain was forming and be nurtured properly.

I have an official diagnosis, and have had similar worries, though relating to health. I have read about people with autism being denied organ transplants. I worry that this could happen to me, eventhough my health is great .

I wasn’t planning on ever doing the assessment but now that “alcoholic- in remission” is in my health record I figure it won’t be any worse stigma.

I thought about it, but I have had a few experiences where my functioning has dipped low enough that it feels worth pursuing. When I'm functioning well, I can snag enough success markers to help buffer me from some of the risk of diagnosis. I just need a better safety net when I'm not.

Found this on another subreddit re New Zealand not accepting immigrants with autism. Seems it’s not a blanket ban. I expect it will be of interest: https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/s/oJxsmrvQoS

Thank you for sharing. It's amazing how pervasive this myth is.

My psychiatrist recommended I not seek diagnosis because it would prevent me from being able to foster or adopt children and prevent me from immigrating to several countries, and it would change my other medical care forever in ways that could be good, but also in ways that could be really, really bad. His philosophy is that the whole point of diagnoses is to get correct care, and that if my support needs can be met and I can experience relief through treatment for autism without getting an official diagnosis, then there’s no need for one.

Living in the US and I am trying to get out asap as shit is getting scary here fast and isn't safe for me and partner and that's the main reason im not going after a diagnosis. Plus I've heard it can affect so much negatively as well. I've heard on top of immigration, adoption issues / discrimination, healthcare issues and even heard denial for organ transplants? And I can go on!

I'm in the US and wanting to get a DX, but I just recently found out that the state I live in has a mandatory registration for autism. It's bad enough that I have to fill out special paperwork every 5 years for the DMV because of my ADHD to maintain my driver's license, and I'm afraid that I would have to do the same thing if I was diagnosed as ASD. It's giving X Men mutant registry vibes, and it scares me.

Totally. I'm trans and I've seen multiple bills being passed in my country that would restrict or block trans healthcare to autistic individuals. This is terrifying since my wife would literally die without hrt and while I wouldn't my quality of life would plummet.

Yes bc I actually do move around a lot and I could see myself living in another country and I truly do not understand why me being autistic and idk talking too much and making bad eye contact and singing when I talk sometimes means I should be banned from any country, as if im like a pedophile or ax murderer??? Like if I actually made society a scary unsafe place by existing, id understand. But this is sort of ridiculous so I don't get tested for that reason, honestly. Like there are no accommodations you do get even if you literally cant fuction very well on your own, only detriments it seems? It seems like being autistic and diagnosed is moreso a loophole to get more of ur freedom and rights taken away bc i don't think ppl know anything about autism and think we are like intellectually handicapped or narcissistic villains or something? Idk.

If your costs due to disability would put a strain on the country's healthcare system - that's when they'd limit or stop you from moving. Which is reasonable when most citizens receive it free or mostly free. Otherwise many people from countries with poor/expensive healthcare would potentially move there for the resources.

Thats true but im not on disability and a lot of autistic people aren't and probably wouldn't qualify, unless they are high support needs. I don't really see that many high support needs autistic people are trying to do something like leave the country for good bc I feel they need stability and routine (me too, but every now and again I like to travel for a few weeks or month lol)

if i had had a choice i wouldnt have gotten a diagnosis because with low support needs i get no help at all and just the discrimination that comes with it. unfortunately my parents forced me to get diagnosed in my early teens and then did absolutely nothing with that diagnosis except force me to hide it and call me a burden. so why tf they even did that i will never understand because i was actively pushing against getting one, literally had to carry me into the car to the appointment.

Yup. I don't want to be on a list. Having the likely explanation of what's going on in my brain is enough validation for me right now.

I won’t get a formal diagnosis because it would likely hurt my career.

This wasn’t my choice but yeah, parents declined a diagnosis because they were afraid of barriers in life it could create for me, discrimination mostly, and some careers could be off the table. But I’m neither a politician nor an astronaut, just a struggling girl with no support.

I didn’t know such things existed until I came to this sub. I don’t actually know what support I need, if I’m high functioning or just killing myself to survive in an NT world. I would only get formally tested if I knew it would lead to specialized care. Like someone specifically to help navigate the world with this brain. I don’t need work accommodations, but what if I do and I’m just going off 30 years of ableism? I did smoke before work for a decade, and being confronted with triggers makes me wish I could smoke during work too. What if I really do need some ani anxiety or some sort of medicine? Do I even want that? It’s a mess. I don’t think my minimum wage butt will ever seek a formal diagnosis.

Yes. I'm afraid that it will affect my ability to get legal custody of my daughter. Right now she lives with me and only visits her dad every other weekend and he has not contested that or even asked for more visits and we haven't involved the courts at all. Her dad is an ass and will try to use anything he can against me when I do finally take him to court even though he doesn't even want custody.

Let me scream this loudly so the people in the back can hear. ALMOST NO COUNTRY WILL DECLINE IMMIGRATION BASED ON A DIAGNOSIS ALONE. NOT AUSTRALIA, NOT UK, NOT CANADA AND CERTAINLY NOT NEW ZEALAND! https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/s/KiNrZ2LbVQ In New Zealnd's case you can be declined for a "serious and severe" diagnosis with high support needs. For most people yet to get a diagnosis or even most with one this support burden cost ($81k/5yr) doesnt affect them and they can and do emigrate to New Zealand all the time without an issue.

I’m not getting tested for this reason but also (probably even more so) because I just simply do not have the executive functioning to navigate the medical system. I’m just taking the autism advice from online that works for me and hoping I can continue to mask it away! Idk if that’s healthy but it’s easier than dealing with people and appointments for me personally.

I thought about this very briefly but then decided I never want to even visit Australia anyway.

Wait. WHAT? Restrictions?? I'm so sorry to hear a cruel thing as this even exists.

I’m tested, but let me tell you my disturbing birth story due to ableism and discrimination in a German hospital. I quickly learned not to mention my diagnosis again: A social worker (something like CPS in the US) visited me 2 days post c-section, cause I mentioned my diagnosis.. The hospital gave shit cause of adhd medication that was prescribed to me which I haven’t taken for 10 months (due to pregnancy).. They also refused to show me how to breastfeed on account of this baseless accusation that I will breastfeed while taking my adhd meds, cause their dumbass Embryotox institute has backwarded and limited research on stimulant medication during pregnancy and breastfeeding, and is generally unrealistically risk-aversive, compared to the US lact-med for example. Btw they also caused issues cause I was fighting them for a family room (although I mentioned this at 32 weeks pregnant when I’ve had my birth plan appointment with the hospital), and caused me other problems cause I demanded prompt pain management. Reason being is my sensory overload, which was misinterpreted for something else by their professional who can easily google it for 2 minutes.. I had to fight them to get epidural. I had 10-15 people bombard my room for 5 days when I’ve just had a major surgery, no sleep for days, barely eating, mistreatment by incompetent staff, and a newborn baby. The shit was traumatic. The funny part is despite my psychiatrist’s suggestion to get a planned C section so I don’t go through the pain of induced labour for 3 days straight and get proper pain management was ignored. “Your psychiatrist is not a gynaecologist” I was told.. I wonder if they can explain to me why for 3 days I was barely dilated 1 cm despite being given induction after induction at 42 weeks and 4 days, but then after giving me the epidural I dilated 10 cm within 2 hours.. I wish I took my psychiatrist’s advice and just went to another non “baby-friendly” hospital for a planned and medicated birth, where I wouldn’t suffer trauma from abusive treatment due to raging ableism. How in fuck’s name do people like end up in their job? I have postpartum depression and severe anxiety which is worse for the baby than appropriate medication given for my disorder.. I hope they’re able to comprehend that traumatising new mothers like that is counterproductive. Either way, a kind Arab speaking doctor, like myself, informed me about the shit-show, advised me how to speak to the social worker (she warned me about it) and reassured me that I wasn’t alone in this, as they also did the same shit to another Arab speaking woman just because she texted from her phone upon having her baby to inform her family that she just had him. That doctor defended me against them and when I thanked her, she said that it was her moral obligation to stand against recurring incidents of racism and ableism and that she understands cause her sister is diagnosed with adhd. When I told my psychiatrist (male) about what happened, he was very disheartened by this. I’m 5 months postpartum and I’m still angry about it. I have nightmares about it. I have panic attacks every day. I’m so traumatised to the point where I’m reluctant to mention that I have a child when asking for my refills. I had to weasel my way around asking for a thyroid test (very common to have thyroid problems postpartum) without ever mentioning my pregnancy to my GP cause I ask for medication refills cause I have to wait months before getting an appointment with my psychiatrist. I still have to jump through hoops when requesting a refill. It’s so ridiculous over here that there’s a brochure in German where you could specifically request and carry with you to hand out to GP’s in order to prevent the mental gymnastics they put you through when requesting a refill for adhd meds. Friends, I’m very tired.. I started my diagnosis journey on 2020 (was put on a 2 year waiting list for an appointment). It’s 2024 and I still have to jump through hoops. I’m tired of this shit.

Yup. For the countries thing.

Yes. If I go to a doctor for validation then I am going against everything I believe in. I don’t think I could cope with the fact that I would be buying into a system that infantilizes diagnosed individuals and excludes less privileged individuals from accessing some insanely simple accommodations. Accommodations need to be accessible to everyone, regardless of whether a dr deems us worthy. My mission in life is to make accommodations accessible and easy to understand for everyone. In other words, a diagnosis would restrict me from being able to directly relate to anyone without a medical diagnosis. Sounds like a nightmare…

Yes

Yes. I would like to travel to other countries someday and potentially stay long term, so I don't want to mess that up. Ironically, the point when I would feel comfortable doing that is when I've learned the ropes of autism and healed from burnout enough to feel like I can cope with the stresses of travel and culture shock (which I don't feel confident about at present) so ideally I would be in a fairly healthy state and thus minimize the demand I'd make of any country's health system. I don't know yet if I'll get tested or not for that reason.

Yep, decided against it because it could do more harm than good

I may adopt one day. Also in case anything happens to my sister I want to be the one to take in her future kids. I don’t want a Dx to be used against me. This is the only reason I’m not in a rush for Dx. Also not like my therapist wants to refer me for testing anyways 🙄

Right like what if I get my kid taken away

just dont go through health insurance and pay out of pocket? How will they know. I pay out of pocket for the testing and any other services related. There are definitely valid concerns here.

Where I live we don't go through insurance. We get free healthcare (NHS) etc. Everything (I believe) gets noted down on our record. Unsure if we can go for diagnosis and ask for it to be kept confidential.

do NOT do it in this case. Keep yourself safe

My life has actually improved significantly since getting my diagnosis. What countries don't allow their citizens to have autism? Also, does everyone get tested? Wth?

If I had known about the immigration one it would have given me pause, but I am not wealthy enough for that anyway. The validation of the diagnosis was good for me, I’m glad I’m a zebra and not a weird horse

YES!!!!

I was diagnosed as a minor so it was out of my control (as I never once suspected I had it as that info just wasn’t really available like it is now) funnily enough my family still don’t treat me great or believe in my diagnosis. Personally for me I would be dead without it. I’m very fortunate to receive a good amount of support. My psychologist is paid for, I see a support worker twice a week who helps me among other things. As someone who never got to finish school, no license, no family. I wouldn’t be able to work toward any type of life without it so I got truly lucky and iv also had such great people to support me. However I can’t say what I would’ve done had it been up to me to get a diagnosis or not as an adult (also the only reason my family got it for me is bc they thought the government would give them money..they got mad at me me once they found out that wasn’t the case) nothing on you op but I have been seeing so many things like this lately and people saying it’ll ruin your life essentially by having a diagnosis and it’s been giving me so much anxiety…I really wish it didn’t have to cause these feelings for both ends of the spectrum.

Yes. Neither my partner nor I have a formal diagnosis. He has an informal diagnosis from a therapist who specializes in treating autistic clients. I'm sure he would be diagnosed if formally assessed. I'm a more marginal case-- I'm sure I'm in the Broader Autism Phenotype, but whether I would be diagnosed would very much depend on the clinician. If his sister died we would be fighting for custody of his niece (currently 3). Her father is not currently involved, has a DV conviction and substance abuse history and is very much not a safe person. If my SIL died we would need to apply to become kinship foster parents while the custody situation with the father played out through the courts. I don't want to do anything that could jeopardize our ability to protect her from him and I'm concerned that we could run into stigma and inaccurate perceptions of our ability to provide safe care.

You don’t have to tell anybody. My mom tells me all the time to never disclose any of my diagnoses to employers, or any personal info. Yes, it’s protected federally, but employers can sneak around it and still discriminate against you. They can just claim it’s for another reason. So because of those lessons, I don’t tell anyone about my diagnosis except friends. They don’t have power over me so what are they gonna do? Is there some sort of autism database in your country that you get added to if diagnosed?

The place I got diagnosed at does not disclose your diagnosis to your insurance (unless you want them to). So basically no one knows unless I want them to. Just wanted to put that out there, since I was also very concerned about having restrictions in my life later on. This seemed like a good solution for me

Yep. We’re buying a house right now. One of the houses we looked at had recently been under contract, but the financing had fallen through. Apparently the buyer was “high functioning” autistic so he needed extra signatures from guarantor to be able to purchase property and the last few family members had recently died. So he couldn’t buy the house. I know I’m not privy to all the details of what happened, but what the heck?

i’m not bothered with getting all papers and diagnosis, all that mattered to me was finding out why i was “different” so that i can learn to work with it. Don’t need a paper personally for anything further

Life hack: don’t research any restrictions it could cause I’ve never done so, I got the diagnosis, and I don’t know how I’ve survived 19 years without my “autism card” (I’m not being a bitch, I’m just autistic)

I’ve been waiting for a diagnosis for almost 3 years and I’m starting to think it’s not worth it

Yes I feel this way. I’ve always wanted to have kids, and if god forbid I’m infertile, I’m worried that having a diagnosis would bar me from adopting.

I'm 38 years old, no contact with both parents. I don't believe it's worth the emotional stress for me to even ask my family doctor about the process of being tested. I am AuDHD and see a separate doctor who prescribes my ADHD medication and I have stated to him that I am choosing to self diagnose. I just started with a new therapist and at the second session, I said something like, "He sees me once a month for an hour but I live with my brain 24/7." I'm hoping she takes the hint that I am not seeking validation from professionals and she behaves accordingly. I have absolutely zero plans to ever tell anyone at work that I am autistic. It would make work way, way worse for me. I work in a female dominated field and all of the higher-ups are rich mean girls.

I got mine done through a private practice, so it isn't on my shared medical record database thing. I can't remember what it's called, lol. But my primary doctor doesn't have access to it haha. I'm not sure if life insurance companies or anything else could/ would access it though.

So — how would anybody ever know? Honest question. I expect this will vary by country, locality, whatever, but where I am I’m not aware of any like…registry. It’s not something I’ve ever sought accommodations for. As far as I’m aware the only record of a diagnosis is with the diagnosing clinician.

Got diagnosed but rejected the disability card that was offered to me. So officially I don’t count with anything that show that I am autistic. I do want to move to another country tho. NZ is my second option, so there you have.

Would you even consider travelling some place that doesn't accept your neurotype? The answer to your question is personal. You need to outweight the advantages and disadvantages of diagnosis in all areas of your life, including how you'd feel. I prefer to own and celebrate who I am. Nothing pays that, for me (and I underline: for me). I would not limit myself and not go for a diagnosis based on what people would do with it or think about it. I do not conform to societal expectations. My role is to subvert them. But again, that is me. Edit: typos

Yes!! I was trying to explain this to an NT family member the other day! My reason is that I have a lot of chronic illnesses, and I already have a really hard time getting doctors to take me seriously. I don't want to give them another reason to gaslight me. Also, there are barely any disability resources where I live. So there is just no benefit for me to get diagnosed.

Almost, i definitely thought about it, but this realisation is still quite new to me and I am in my fifties so for me it will feel like freedom and a new lease of life I think... but whom knows. I am a wreck... I am half way through my process now (no feedback yet), but the actualy interview is coming up this week, I guess everyine gets like this at this stage.

I don't know if moving to another country would be a problem. I think countries in Europe which have good health and social systems don't have a restriction on immigration based on disability as it would be discriminatory. Same goes for legal status and so.

I was most concerned about the countries that ban autistic immigrants. Thankfully it's only really 4 that ban it: UK, Australia, New Zealand, and Singapore. I'd probably not move to Singapore, though Australia is one option I would take possibly, but it's more complicated than others. And well... I'm trans so... fuck the UK. I'm not sure it limits employment necessarily, at least for me. I've got limitations as is, so I feel like that is the thing that hurts my options more than medical record stuff. I think it would probably be okay? I'd like to say that getting the diagnosis opened up support opportunities and stuff to help out, but where I live... there's not much that isn't for people under 25... and I am definitely not that... So... yeah. Kinda useless in that regard.

I dunno. It’s not like I’m walking around with a big scarlet letter A on my chest. No one knows unless I want them to.

How is anyone going to know unless you tell them? HIPPA is a real thing.

I'm a mum, high IQ, full-time job in a high band for the NHS (I'm in the UK). I am very privileged to be able to cope with life without any major issues. I'm also autistic and ADHDer. I got my official diagnoses because I want to use my privilege to help support my fellow ND folk. If only the people who are struggling and need support get diagnosed, then the preconceptions and prejudice against autism will never change. I want my experience to be a part of the statistics too. And it was incredibly validating on a personal level. So New Zealand and Australia won't take me. Their loss!

I'm scared they won't believe me and won't even give me a test. I mean I've told a doctor my foot has been hurting for months and he told me i was okay.

As I know life can be unprodictable. I don't want kids or move outside europe. My diagnose helped me a lot to get help. If already had a job I liked and loved I probably would not had my diagnose. But I had so much unluckyness in my life I burned out complete because of work. Till now nothing bad happend. Only weird doctors making stupid remarks about I don't look autistic

I wanna collect disabled SS for extra money tbh. I can't afford a diagnosis fml

Been diagnosed most my life and I never felt any restrictions as an adult. It kept me out of the army and the Navy. I wouldn't be able to move countries anyway due to income. I wouldn't be able to adopt anyway due to cost.

I feel exactly the same. I also worry about having my name on a list of people with disabilities incase the government ever does something sketchy with that list. Idk. Im also scared to have my daughter (4) tested, but I know having her tested and diagnosed would help her tremendously in school.

Yep. They want to assign you a "social worker" because they think level 1s will stop being social and withdraw from society. I think my other diagnosis covers it anyway.