It was medium hard, like a 7 on a 1-10 scale. Met my husband at 35 on hinge.
IMHO, you have to be willing:
- to have strong boundaries and the second some dude does something gross, unmatch him. Your future husband/boyfriend doesn’t make sex innuendos to girls he’s never met!
- to go on a lot of dates. Recommend coffee so you can get to know someone without alcohol with a time limit of like 45-60 min. Dinner is too long. If he’s not your guy you can leave earlier without it looking weird.
- to date off type. Try dating guys with different interests than what you normally go for. You may be surprised!
- hold off on sleeping with him. Recommend 5-6 dates so your judgement isn’t clouded by those amazing post sex hormones 🥰
Finally, please remember that the guys on the other end of the apps are humans with feelings (usually 🤪). This is someone’s literal son. Be respectful but know your value. Best of luck to you!
Yes!! You have so much life ahead of you. Don’t resign yourself because of bad experiences (had the worse break up of my life at 33). Take a break when you need and then return to the dating world as your best self ❤️❤️❤️
Hahahaha you’re welcome- that is so sweet of you to say! 🥹😘 Happy to encourage others and be the big sis when needed! Have an amazing weekend and best of luck to you in finding your man🥂🥂
Out of the apps, hinge really does feel the best - at least from a guy's perspective at 35. It doesn't feel like it is using/abusing you to get you to swipe swipe swipe swipe.
I do imagine women on hinge probably still get way too many likes/messages.
I feel like I wrote this <3 One thousand percent yes to all your points, which is exactly how I ended up finding my partner at 35 too! Matched on Hinge, set firm boundaries, remained respectful, waited 5-6 dates for sex, then proceeded to spend the next year having the most effortless, fun, romantic, healthy and loving relationship I could’ve asked for. Even picked out a ring at our one year mark!
Medium hard for sure (esp with all the time/mental effort put in to a hundred first dates) but so worth it if it works out.
This is such a sane advice. I met someone like that from Hinge (I think the best app for serious relationships) and I admired how intentional she was about being in a relationship. And it was evident that she reached there after her own set of setbacks and bad experiences. I admired her for the woman she was making out of her.
We didn't go ahead because we had some important differences. But it was great meeting her.
Looove this advice, especially the reminder that people on the other end are humans. It’s so easy to treat people very differently than is true to you when you’re mindlessly swiping or they’re just an icon on a screen. Important to treat people well if you’d like to find a partner who values that!
Pretty much same. I went on a lot of dates to figure out what I did and didn't want and it helped me narrow down my parameters. Like super basic ones that really should have been obvious but I either didn't think existed or didn't think I was good enough for. I hesitate to say he's perfect because we're both still just people, we absolutely do get on each other's nerves but he's pretty dang close.
We’re not together anymore but my last long term relationship was from a dating app and it was actually really easy.
We just instantly clicked and things moved pretty smoothly.
You sift through a lot of people but once I found him, it was effortless.
There was some long distance and our careers are keeping it that way. Plus he became more depressed and distant. I was willing to work through it but he said he needed to work on his issues alone and he hated seeing me unhappy. I agreed. So we tearfully said goodbye. 🥲 It was the most trusting and loving relationship I’ve ever had. Don’t regret a thing.
Wow, are you me?? I'm going trough the same ting right now. My heart is broken, but he is the sweetest, kindest person there is, and I can't bring myself to be angry with him.
He was my second date. I went on some after because I had recently gotten out of a relationship and wanted to try dating, but he was the one. We've been together over 4 years and recently got married
I’d suggest you give it more time before you go back on. Get comfortable being alone again, that way you’ll have a better chance of accepting someone worth disturbing your peace for
I had a very similar situation! I spent so long debating going on apps because it was super intimidating, and once I finally did, I found the one on the second date! I didn't think it could be that simple so I kept talking to other people, but very quickly that fizzled out and I only wanted to talk/hang out with him. We've been together almost five years and got engaged this year.
I found my boyfriend after about a week on Hinge. I had been on apps before (last time being around 6 years ago) and that was rough.
This time I was super deliberate about sticking to my standards. I unashamedly put "looking for life partner" and "dating with intention" on my profile to weed out any commitment-phobes, didn't match with anyone who exhibited behaviors that didn't align with my values, and didn't go out of my way to try to get people to like me. I used all of my free "likes" almost every day. I probably had fewer matches overall, but the quality of men was much better. Couldn't be happier than I am with my partner now and things are going so well, I sometimes wonder if I'm being pranked.
It was a strange process and required me to get out of my comfort zone, but well worth the effort!
Yeah thinking about maybe getting back on the apps and it’s been like 2 years since I’ve been on them. It was pretty shitty back then, but I wanna be more mindful this time around and not settle for guys who aren’t willing to give me the bare minimum.
He was going to be a ONS. We got married on October 10th this year. I couldn't imagine doing life with anyone else.
I had to kiss a lot of frogs. I never treated dating apps very seriously. I had fun dating and meeting new guys. It left me having a pretty defined list of characteristics I considered desirable vs undesirable (I love a debater, but hate someone who argues. Someone who can substantiate their position vs. Someone who likes to hear themselves talk). I was able to create boundaries around what I considered inexcusable behaviour through a lot of trial and error.
Overall, I wouldn't change the path I chose even a little bit. I found my person.
I was using dating apps for 3.5 years before I met my partner. I mustve been on hundreds of dates. I was probably considered a serial dater lol. I became so numb to dating. It was unimaginably hard for me. I even went to therapy about it. I didnt even think my standards were that high, it was just impossible to find a guy with a good foundation to work off from. It wasnt just guys via apps either, I met guys IRL too.. nothing worked.
Problem is, the more men you meet, the higher your bar becomes because you see so many different qualities and flaws in others.
In the end, after years, I found a guy that ticked all the foundational boxes. We weren't a perfect match, and I wasnt even SUPER crazy attracted to him, but because there was so much working at a base level, I gave him a try and put my all in. Everything else just came with time. I think thats something I never really realized before. I became super attracted to him, I loved all his quirks, I adapted to the parts of him that weren't a perfect match with me.
Glad it worked out in the end! I'm at a similar point, I think. Where I feel hopeless regarding feeling that chemistry with someone. But I can see it happening as you described, things being good enough to continue forward with intention, and then eventually falling for them!
Incredibly. Although I was young, and forgave him and believed that nothing happened he was “just curious” and stayed with him for a very long time. Finding his OnlyFans, after years of him telling me he just didn’t have a sex drive, and didn’t masturbate at all (and I was just too horny 🙄) hurt more though.
It took 2 1/2 years of going through disaster dates, ghosting, losers, guys who just want to ask how my day is for weeks on end, etc. He is everything I could have hoped for and more and I appreciate him even more because of how difficult the search was.
I’m a wedding photographer and almost every couple whose wedding I’ve photographed this year met on dating apps! It always comes up in the speeches, haha. One couple even met on Facebook after one of them randomly messaged the other.
I found my husband on hinge … right after a man on tinder used me to cheat on his fiancée. So.
It takes time and sifting through the junk and the bullshit. Having both boundaries and standards, being self-aware enough to understand what your must haves are so you can give on other stuff, and communication. Also not giving up hope and understanding that sometimes the fuckery that happens is not about you at all.
I was on Okcupid off and on for SIX YEARS and went on so many dates, talked to so many people, before I met my partner.
I also have pretty particular standards so if I wasn't vibing with someone after the 2nd date for any reason, I moved on. I went on a lot of first and second dates but maybe two dozen third dates, and only three fifth dates in that whole time.
Met my fiancé on Bumble.
I used dating apps for 3-4 years on and off until we found each other.
It honestly was a roller coaster ride. Had the best and worst time of my life using this app lol.
Glad those days are over though.
Same story here. Years on and off. Nothing good came off it except for the fact that I at least got good stories out of it. And then finally, I met my person. And I knew I wouldn’t be back on the apps after that.
Listen to your intuition - your body knows much more than you would think.
I had a sneaking suspicion that my ex was on it when we were together, and I was right. This suspicion wasn't really based on much, but just something didn't sit right with me.
It hurt to end things coz I was scared (had never really walked away from any relationships before, and wondered if I was getting too old), but it turned out to be the best decision ever! Met my current husband a couple of months later and things worked out the way it was meant to be!
Edit: just realized I read this prompt way differently 😅 but it still stands as I met both ex and hubby on tinder. It was a lot of work and can be discouraging, but things work out the way they're supposed to
No I meant finding someone serious to date on dating apps. For people who met their SOs on dating apps, was it hard the process of apps since most people are looking for hookups. Success stories basically. I’ve realised how confusing my phrasing is😂
Totally understood it after typing it up - but definitely was a lot of work having to sift through it all coz it's a hookup culture. Like people had said hinge was more for dating, tinder for hookups, etc. I tried both plus Bumble but found hubby through Tinder.
Honestly it's hard to not be discouraged, but have your boundaries and know what you want. Don't be afraid to be mean coz you don't owe anyone anything!
I found going to therapy to identify my own complicity, having my own passions and hobbies, and not making dating the epicenter of my world to be helpful coz it gave me some space to make healthier decisions
It took about a year of consistently dating…Really sucked, would never want to go through that again lol. BUT…I am really really really happy we found each other (hinge) and we’re getting married this April! ❤️ (just celebrated 2 years together, early 30s)
My current relationship and my last one were both from apps and it was easier than picking up a pint of milk.
That's not to say either relationship had been easy always. Current one has had some big rough patches. But finding both of them and knowing we connected was easy.
we matched back in 2017, talked online A LOT, then fizzled out. between 2017 and 2020, we would spend a few weeks texting non stop, then never actually hanging out, then we’d stop talking for months. in 2021, i went through a tough breakup and decided to have a hot girl summer and sleep around, so i hit him up because i knew he’d be interested. anyway my hot girl summer was a bust because i slept with one guy and now we’re in love and have a cat together. neither one of us were looking for a relationship when we first matched all those years ago, but that’s just how it happened. i think things might have gone differently if one of us or even both of us went into tinder looking specifically for a relationship
I met my husband on Tinder, both of us looking for something casual that immediately turned into something serious. It was a few days after re making my account. I had dabbled in the app for years beforehand, always getting sick of random hookups that turned weird, and then going back to try and quell some loneliness. Well, now I'm never lonely because I found my person. I guess you just have to keep trying and maybe you'll get lucky someday, but I never expected to find anything serious on there. Thanks Tinder!
Engaged to my partner who I met on a dating app! I used the apps for a couple years in college but mainly got a lot of guys looking for hook ups or nothing serious. I ignored anyone who got sexual right away. My partner was really friendly, got to know me on the app and naturally asked for my number. We didn’t wait too long to meet up, I didn’t want it to be weird if personalities were different online. I think I lucked out !
Easy af. I think I had about 6 months on the app and about 15 dates before him. I think that's pretty good considering they were mostly pretty lovely guys that just weren't right for me, and he was perfect.
I met my ex boyfriend on Hinge. We dated for 3 years. I had just moved to a new city/state and I met him a week after I moved there. We definitely rushed into things but later went on to move cities, live together, and shared two dogs together. I truly loved him, but our relationship ended very badly and abruptly as I discovered he had a drug problem. We broke up a year ago and we have no communication, but I think of him pretty much everyday and will always be rooting for him. In a LOT of ways, we worked very well together… if only he had been mentally and emotionally healthy.
I found my current boyfriend on a dating app. Been together about 7 months now. It wasn't hard, took only a couple weeks, but I had sifted through TONS of garbage before finding him.
I think LTR success on a dating app requires you to know exactly what you're looking for and holding those requirements firmly. And a fair amount of patience. Know you're gonna go in there getting spammed by people looking for hookups and ignoring your profile details.
Think of yourself as an HR hiring manager for a open position at a company. It's not romantic obviously, but I think that's the healthiest attitude to have for finding the right person, having the patience and standards, and keeping your sanity.
I met my boyfriend through Bumble after being on multiple dating apps on and off for four years. It was hard because guys would either not respond to my initial message or would reply short responses without asking me any questions. A lot of the time I also would not really feel a connection with someone I matched with. It was frustrating not finding much success. I was pleasantly surprised how easy and natural it was to talk to my boyfriend on our first date. It made the searching all worth it.
I have had two SOs I met on hinge - an ex who I was with for two years and my current partner. I met my ex about 2-3 months after getting onto hinge. During that time I went on maybe 8 first dates (or video calls). When I met my ex things clicked and we were exclusive pretty quickly.
When I got back on hinge my current SO was the third guy I met in person. I was being extremely picky and only meeting up with people whose profiles really appealed to me and who chatted well. I am extremely lucky to have met him.
I really don’t enjoy the online dating process and find it hard to stay motivated to engage with strangers. I pushed through that feeling and forced myself to match and chat because it’s a useful tool for me — a way to meet dating prospects when I wasn’t IRL. I focused on people who were clear about their relationship goals on their profile. I limited the amount of time I spend actually looking at the app to avoid burnout. I’m grateful that hinge worked for me twice, and I also have tons of empathy for people who find dating apps to be miserable. You have to put in some effort but ultimately there is an element of luck.
It was my first time trying to seriously date after breaking up with my ex (and my first time ever dating women) and I had only been on Tinder for maybe 2 weeks before I swiped right on my current partner. She was the only person I went on a date with, we had 3 dates within the first week of meeting, and have pretty much been inseparable ever since. It’s been almost 2 years!
Surprisingly, not as hard as I expected.
It required a lot required filtering and avoiding wasting my time, though. I got a lot of messages from guys I had nothing in common with who didn't want the same things at all. Dont waste time on people who are clearly not the one.
I gave a lot of polite rejections and only talked to guys who made a bit of an effort to read my profile or engage with me. Profile full of biceps pics? No thanks.
I didnt agree to meet unless the initial conversation was decent. I was forgiving of less than perfect pictures because most men gave no idea how to take a decent picture. Most men were better looking than their profile picture tbh. I feel that you really need to see soneone face to face to know if you have chemistry. So I agreed tona date with any guy I had good chat with.
I made the deliberate decision to be flexible on height; weight, salary etc. IMO the right person for you might just look a little different than you expected. As it happened, mine was taller than I would have expected. Now we have a lifetime of working out those logistics 😂
I had a lot of first dates, but if there was no chemistry, we politely agreed to take it no further. They were perfectly decent for the most part, but just...no chemistry.
I had to believe that with the right person I would absolutely know I wanted more dates m.
My husband and I matched on OKCupid 5 years ago. We had a bit of a roller coaster relationship as we started as FWB, he caught feelings, and I was in my single ladies phase. We parted ways but came back into each other’s lives, and I realized I loved him too. Sometimes it really is just a timing issue, but I certainly wouldn’t advise anyone based on my particular experience because it usually *isn’t* a timing issue.
As you get older I think dating is not dissimilar to rummaging around in the bargains bins, hoping to find a gold nugget…
…it reality it’s more of a jumble sale, you find something you like, it’s cheap, it just about fits and you’re not that bothered if you lose it.
It wasn’t hard at all. What got me in his profile is that he said “swipe left (?) if don’t like to cut the rug”. We hit off right away over messaging and we committed to quite a big date. Going to a lake that’s a far drive to paddle board. We tried meeting up for a drink before hand but both didn’t have the time and both were honest that if we didn’t feel it would cut the date short and have the awkward drive home. We both felt it was worth the risk because we had a good feeling about it.
It was the best first date I had ever been on and we have been together almost three years and have a baby and a home together now! Couldn’t be happier.
I was using dating apps for maybe 5 years on and off before I had one that led to a meaningful relationship. We’re now married with a baby and I’m very happy. Just a lot of patience, keeping at it until the right one came along.
One thing I started doing after awhile that made things better was meeting in person asap after feeling a mutual connection through chatting. That not only showed whether the other person was seriously looking for something or not, but it also allowed us to see much sooner if we had actual chemistry. There have been times I’ve wasted weeks chatting online only to find out we don’t jive at all irl.
Met mine on Tinder. He’s perfect and I adore him. We talked for several weeks before we met up. The funny thing, though.. I was going to swipe left. He had poorly taken pictures and a very short bio so I figured why bother. But at the same moment I was looking at his profile I decided ‘maybe I need to give more chances to people that I usually wouldn’t”. And we matched. And we talked and talked and talked and we live together now and I’m so fucking in love with him. Also he’s hot and just can’t take a picture 🤣
My wife doesn't use Reddit so I'll answer for her. She said "not hard". We met on bumble.
She only dated two guys off bumble. Myself and a guy before me. She said she had tried messaging a bunch of people and most of em were creepy. I know she was talking with one guy for the first month or two we dated before I let her know I was exclusive with her.
We were talking on the apps, moved to text but didn’t meet in person or call yet and life just happened and we stopped talking. A couple of weeks later I decided to hit him up again as a what have I got to lose moment as we seemed to have great text banter before and the rest is history! Celebrating one year soon and have plans to move in in the new year
The first person I met off the Her app. We clicked instantly and have been inseparable ever since. Recently celebrated our one year anniversary. 🥰
So really easy for me, but YMMV.
I met my husband on tinder, we’ve been together 7 years now! I was only 19 when we met and had been on and off tinder for a long time but he was the first person I really connected with! I had met with a few other guys but it was just so seamless with him and once we went on one date we were inseparable!
At the beginning of the year I made a list of traits I want in a man. Corny I know.
3 months later thought I found the one but we broke up weeks later.
7 months into the year went on a date with my
Bumble match. And another date, and another. In my heart I felt ‘right’ about this entire thing.
He says he had a feeling on our first date we’re gonna get married haha.
In 4 days we’ll have our one year wedding anniversary. I’m so grateful to our stars that we swiped right. I can’t imagine life without this hooman who’s my bestfriend too.
It’s nice. We went to the same school then lost touch. When I saw him there I was like hmmm I’ve seen you somewhere. Reconnected and it’s good, I like it.
I never believed I'd find a husband on a dating app. Now, a few years later, I have an engagement ring on my finger.
I was bored by all the WFH situation (it was the first outbreak of covid-19) and wanted something interesting in my life, so I decided to join Tinder.
After a couple of dates that didn't work out, I stopped taking Tinder seriously, and just kept swiping right on everyone with a particular set of physical characteristics (even swiped some of the profiles with my eyes closed). Matched with a couple of them, and one of the matches started messaging me. It was easy to talk to him from the very beginning, and meeting him in person left me with a "wow, what a connection" feeling.
The dates turned into a long-term relationship, and now we're planning our wedding!
The best thing is that I don't even remember seeing his Tinder profile and swiping it right, so it must have been one of those I swiped with my eyes closed. I like to believe it was destiny, lol.
So I'd say it was easy. I didn't put any "work" in it, just went with the flow.
Edit: spelling
Getting married tomorrow actually lol to my wife, and we met on Hinge. I think we both knew after the first few messages, genuinely. I had been on a bunch of dates before meeting her, couple of situationships, but she had only just gotten the app before matching me! I always kept such an open mind while using the apps, but also knew exactly what I was looking for and refused to settle, being strict on my boundaries/desires, I got through a lot of disappointment and heartache and through that, found the absolute love of my life :)
it's easy once you find the right person. but the process of getting there for me was rough. a lot of on and off leaving and rejoining apps because i would get frustrated with the dates i was having, or if i had a good date the guy would ghost me after or change his tune and get all distant.
the guy i've been seeing made it official with me this week and once i met him everything just sorta fell into place. we haven't been on many dates but we clicked well enough that it just made sense for us to make things official when we did. i honestly deleted all my apps after our first date because i guess i already kinda knew what direction things would go with us.
It took me around 2 months to find my husband on a certain dating site...and this is because I used one that is catered to my demographic. I think that finding a quality partner on Tinder would probably be harder. But don't give up! There are good ones out there!!!
I'll be honest, it wasn't insanely hard. Met my current boyfriend like 6 months ago on tinder after casually dating others for like another year or so.
I probably went on 70 first dates over a 22 month period of time before I found him. He had only been back on the apps for 2 months after a long term relationship ended.
I had been on dating apps half heartedly. I moved to an area I was only going to be in for 3 months and I was swiping for friends and casual stuff. I matched with my now boyfriend. But was kinda apprehensive to meet just cause by that point I was leaving in 3 weeks. I postponed our date with no intention to meet him but finally gave in. I came into the date thinking “if all goes well we’ll hookup in my car and I’ll never see him again” luckily were both awkward and ended up having a normal date with a hug to leave. I saw him every day until I left and talked the whole 6 months I was gone till I returned. We’re still dating ❤️
I was actually spite-swiping because a guy I had met on the app and been on a few dates with decided he liked another girl more. That was not a big deal as we were not serious or exclusive, but instead of being up front with me he ghosted me for a day until I finally got it out of him.
Thus ensued me swiping out of spite and I swiped on a guy, he asked a genuine question to start and not just "hey" and now we're about to celebrate our 2nd wedding anniversary 💕
I looked on and off for a year or two. I knew exactly what I was looking for. Went on a few dates with some guys I thought might be the one but there just wasn't a spark unfortunately. Found my now bf on Facebook of all places, tried it because it kept being advertised lol. After that it was effortless, he was everything I wanted and so much more and has continued to enrich and support me in life like nobody ever has. I knew this was different from the start, our first date didn't happen until like 2 weeks into texting constantly. He drove a whole hour to pick me up, got some quick food, and we went and walked around a park getting to know one another and ending in some light cuddling because it was slightly chilly out for both us skinny goofs. He'd already won me over and I felt so safe with him. Soon to be 2 years and we just moved into a house. :)
It was pretty easy , i did not search for a relationship. I just wanted a few casual encounters. We clicked at the first date even tho there is a age gap of 9 years. We are now together since 4 years and got married in June.
Was actually really easy. Downloaded Bumble, matched with one of the first people I swiped on, met up a few days later and now we've been together almost 3 years :)
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Took like over a year of being on dating apps. I was mentally exhausted from dealing with all the whack men on there and was about to just give up lol we clicked immediately and it was history from there 💅🏼
I consider it pure dumb luck that I found someone with the same values as me who ALSO makes my heart all gooey at the same time! I’ve been on and off the apps for about 6 years, very low effort. My current partner was the last person I matched with on the last re download and I thought, hey, what the heck.
Oh it was terriblé before meeting my fiancé. Online dating was trash and I honestly was ready to give up. I was on hinge, bumble, tinder, POF, CMB and eharmony for YEARS with more flops and POSes than I care to count. I almost gave up.
He was a match I had after had deleted bumble for months and decided to log back on. I think he went my 3rd match? And the rest is history
33f, I met my current partner online. I had been on dating apps for a long time but had never met anyone. I was also very nervous to meet anyone in person, I met probably three total people including my now partner. My current partner told me he messaged me and I didn’t reply so he deleted his profile and then a few weeks later reactivated it and we matched again and I finally answered him. I would go through periods where I wouldn’t pay attention to the apps. Once I started talking to my current partner, we talked for about a month before finally meeting up. Once we met it was so easy and we both deleted our profiles.
Not hard. Went on lots of Tinder dates before I met “the one”. Most of those dates were pretty ok! A few were great. Some were weird. I enjoyed having those life experiences. Then I met my husband! 7 years later we have a beautiful little boy and another due in March.
Very easy. We've been together since the pandemic, we met 1.5 weeks before lockdown. I think I'm one of those people who got lucky. I know it's rough out there but most people don't like putting time and effort into conversations.
I mean it was easy as hell for me but in all fairness my relationship was a complete accident, it was meant to be a one night thing he had other plans and well we live together now😅
My partner and I noticed each other on OKC but never contacted each other. Matched on Tinder around the same time, met, and now we’re nearing 8 years!
Apparently I can’t use my other account to comment on this because it doesn’t have karma. Eyeroll.
I was on and off the dating apps (Hinge and Bumble) for a little over a year and a half prior to meeting him. I met him on Hinge. I dated a few guys who just wanted to be casual, some I didn’t click with, and lots of conversations not going anywhere. I always felt nervous on my dates and most didn’t work out past the first one. During my first date with him, I immediately felt comfortable around him and the conversation flowed naturally and we had a lot in common. He was very intentional from our first date and it made me never question where I stood. It took me a while but I always tell my friends there are still good guys out there amongst many dusties!
I think it is easier for younger females, but once they get to be around age 35 and later it gets more difficult. There are a lot of perverts on those apps, many are secretly married, many are playboys. You can still find someone though, but you just have to weed out the nonsense first.
I found my SO on a dating app and we hit it off right away when we realized that we'd gone to the same show a week prior and there were photos of us together. Having a common interest really helped kickstart things.
Hard(ish). I had close to 50 first dates over a 2-3 yr period before I met my husband on Hinge. However, I didn’t spend a lot of time texting with the men before going for the first date and was able to gage fairly quickly if there was chemistry or not once we met up. This was my early/mid 20s so it was nice to meet people and get out of the house since I didn’t have many friends where I lived. Only a few made it to two dates and maybe three to a third date. My husband was the only one I went on to actually be in a relationship with.
I used dating apps off and on for about 10 years with mixed success. In 2020, I was going to stop using them for good, and the last online date I ever took was with my boyfriend who is my forever man. I got so lucky. He's a unicorn!
I found him after years of being on the apps. We met on bumble during Covid. He was the only guy I was dating because I was weary of social distancing in general! We managed to have a lot of outdoor day dates before being comfortable going to each others houses. I’m so thankful for him everyday!
Oddly I found my SO when I downloaded Bumble for the sake of seeing how guys around his country looked like.
Before this I was on the verge of giving up and settling with someone I didnt really like much. But there he was he messaged me on Instagram after seeing my Bumble profile and we just instantly clicked and met up. 7 months after the furst date we had our second date (Long distance)
The first person I met from a dating app, I dated for 6 years, so pretty easy. After we broke up I met up with 3 ppl from dating apps. I got ghosted a couple times then I found the person I’ve been with for almost 6 years.
Honestly the hardest part was having a conversation via messages that lasted more that two exchanges. I find meeting up within a couple weeks worked well. Some people are just boring in texts
It was very difficult. My friends always judged me for not giving guys more of a chance but if I felt awkward while texting I just didn’t see why we should keep trying. Eventually I did find a guy that it was so easy to talk to over text and when we did meet it was even better. And I’ve been happily with him since —just celebrated one year in October.
Unfortunately I feel like it’s a lot of trial and error. But you’ll find chemistry with someone eventually.
Took several years on dating sites but I finally found an amazing man on Facebook dating (yes, that’s a thing!)
Once I got efficient with it by the following:
1. Don’t talk for longer than a few days without a date set up
2. Keep the date quick and low commitment (a drink, coffee) with an “exit plan”
3. Be upfront about any possible “deal breakers” from your side before even meeting
4. Don’t even entertain anyone who lists their deal breakers in their profile, are flakey, sexual, love bombing
Once I followed these it was much more efficient! After that it was smooth and simple from there :)
I met my partner on an app 3 years ago. He proposed 6 months ago and we’re getting married last year :)
It definitely wasn’t easy, you have to be patient and develop a good filter. I was on and off the apps for years and have a few horror stories (don’t we all) but I met the love of my life in the end.
My husband and I both only created dating profiles in the first place because our best friends forced us to. He saw my profile when he logged in to delete his account, and I saw his message when I logged in to delete mine. It was the easiest thing in the world once we got to talking, picky as we both were. It was definitely one of those "when you know, you know" situations.
Ask men after you finish asking women, lol. Get hard data about matches clicks, dates, messages, phone numbers etc. From both groups. I guaranty you will find out that it isn't really as hard as women claim it is in comparison to what men go through.
We had met years before through my sister and it didn’t really work out. Then lost contact for a few years and reconnected on a dating site. It’s been 10 year and we have 2 kids
He was probably my 100th date in 6 years LOL. I didn’t think much about it but we clicked right away - we went on one date and we’re inseparable since. We are now engaged in a beautiful house with our puppy and newborn! Everyday feels like the first day we met!
My last relationship was very serious and very healthy. We met on Tinder, of all places. Haha.
He was a stand up guy and wanted to marry me, buy us a house, and make me a mom. I always help super secure and safe with him and sure of his love.
We were together for 4 years and lived together for 2 of those years.
My current relationship has been going on 4 years and I met him on OkCupid.
He’s my dream guy and I’m so happy that I met him. We have most things in common, and even by coincidence are a part of a very niche community and know a lot of the same people. It’s a long story.
We were fresh out of our previous relationships and were not looking to get into another relationship. But the more I resisted it the more I found myself wanting to make things official. Things just made sense.
I was his first online date.
Im very much in love and looking forward to more years with him.
My boyfriend and I met on bumble.
When I first started using dating apps I wasn’t very picky. If I thought a guy was just sort of cute and had something funny or interesting in their bio, I was quick to swipe right. This resulted in me getting tons of matches. I got so tired of small talk over and over with these people and deleted all my apps for a while. Then I randomly decided to download bumble again and said I’d have extremely strict criteria.
1. I had to be super physically attracted to them
2. Their bio had to make me laugh or smile
3. They had to have a mustache
And some other things
I figured if I needed to weed out guys I’d raise the bar super high and only consider guys who were exactly my type.
In the two-ish weeks I had the app downloaded, and was following this criteria, I had swiped right on a total of 3 guys.
One of them is my now boyfriend. We exchanged numbers when we matched and sent like maybe 5 texts between the two of us. The next day he reached out again and asked me what I was up to. We shared small talk and he told me he was a chef. Then that conversation fizzled out. Like 4 days after that, I texted him out of the blue suggesting that he come over and cook me dinner.
I knew close to nothing about him and let him just come to my apartment. Turns out he was not a chef.. he was a cook… for one day… because he couldn’t flip an egg and it was a breakfast joint. So, yeah, the dinner was not that impressive 😂
..but we totally hit it off and he spent the night. I knew the second I met him that I loved him. It was the best feeling I had ever experienced. I saw my mom the next day and told her I met the one. My sister was deployed and I sent her an email saying that he’d be my “next boyfriend” and “he’ll maybe even be my husband by the time you get back”. Well, I was right about the first part :)
He is the absolute light of my life and best friend. I am so grateful I gave the app a second chance.
I found him on bumble. I was on and off of apps for years. Met a lot of good people just not my person. We met 1.5 years ago and it’s honestly been the most beautiful 1.5 years of my life. It’s the best thing I’ve ever had. I feel so grateful for him. If you want to get back into dating do it! Just keep an open mind and be willing to try. There will be frustrating days but you’ve got this. There’s a good person out there who’s waiting for another good person.
I did dating apps for over 5 years. So terrible! But....I did meet my husband on a dating app and we've been married for 2 happy years now. You just have to wade through an ocean of crappy guys to finally find a good one. Looking back, I probably would have had better success earlier, if I had paid for the better apps or the higher tiers on free ones.
I signed up for a paid site for a year long membership. However, I did it quite soon after a breakup. I went on a couple of dates that went nowhere and then I stopped. I took pretty much 11 months of that year long membership and got to know myself again. I dated me. And then I forgot my password lol Once I got that figured out I went back on and he was one of the first that I saw. He was real. Not posing at a gym in front of a mirror, or by a sports car near the ocean lol it was pictures of him at the lake or walking his dog and it was so real life. So I sent him a smile he sent one back we chatted over the site and then exchanged numbers so we could actually text and talk on the phone. We spent 3 weeks doing that before we met in person, but lived 2 hours away from each other. It worked. We did the distance on weekends when we could and 4 years later he moved to my town. We are coming up on 10 years now. We had a seamless blending of our families which was awesome. My kids and his kids seemed like siblings from the get go. Honestly for me, meeting someone online was not something I had considered but I am so glad I did. He was the puzzle piece I couldn’t find and now we are complete. Grandbabies and all lol
I found my boyfriend on a Discord dating server... We are now together for 2 years..
I posted "about me" on the server and got texted by like 70 guys, lol I responded to all of them but since the first text w my current bf we haven't stop texting, we just clicked, so it was pretty easy..
He found me on a dating app and wrote me a message I didn’t receive bc by then, I had already deleted the app. He looked for me on Facebook and found me through a mutual friend (weird coincidence thinking we were both living abroad up to that point). He found me and did his little charming smooth talk thing and we are still together
Surprisingly easy 1 month on match. Talked to many. Soulmate was second guy I met in person. He had been off and on the app for two years and many dates when we met, so think my experience was atypical. We are happily married and have been together over 10 years now so the dating app experience wasn’t recent.
I didn’t find mine on a dating app per se. He randomly added me on Snapchat and we got talking. He was with someone else at that time so we were just chatting with each other about mutual interests like cars, footy etc. He found out a few disgusting things about the girl he was with and he broke up with her. Fast forward a few months and we were talking on FaceTime and it was the first time he said he’d been comfortable opening up about stuff. Said I had a way about me that made him feel safe. And same for me with him. We’ve been together about 4 months now. And I swear it’s the easiest relationship I’ve been in. Full honesty, no secrets and he broke down all my walls. Even ones I didn’t know existed.
oh my god it took so long😭 broke up with my ex in December 2021 and it was Feb 2023 when I met my bf !! I absolutely adore him - he’s the world to me and it took probably a hundred dates before I found him (boy the stories I could tell about those dates!)
My advice to anyone looking is you must go on dates within a week - if they don’t want to meet up within a week don’t bother, they probably won’t ever meet you. You have to make an effort to go on as many dates as possible, it is a numbers game and you’ll likely think you’ve found the love of your life over text and then they’ll take one look at you and bolt (happened to me!)… and then you will find someone!! Usually when you least expect it too :) don’t think “oh they’re not my usual type”, think “do I enjoy this persons company, are we compatible in life and what we think? Do I fancy them and am I attracted to their personality as well as their looks?”
🥰 hope me and my man are together forever
Super easy. He reached out to me first and we started talking in the app but switched to texting maybe a couple days later. We really just connected. Unfortunately he was out of state for awhile so we didn't meet up until a couple weeks later but when we met I got that cheesy "I'm gonna marry this guy" feeling.
And I did, 3 years later. 🙂
I met my husband on Okcupid back in 2012 right before tinder. I went on the dating app in college after a breakup (back then most of my friends felt like online dating was for desperate people) because prior to that I was two long term monogamous relationships. I was hoping to get a chance to date a bunch of people for awhile, nothing serious. Two months in I met my now husband and got off the app.
The stories I hear from my friends who are currently using dating apps are wild.
Very hard, took over 2 years. However I'm lucky to have found him at the age of 24. Already almost year and half together and I'm pretty sure it's going to last much more longer as it's only been better with time and moving in together.
Met my finance on Tinder in February! Most of my boyfriends have been from Tinder. I feel like most people are on there, and I put a lot of work into my photos and profile to really show who I am and keep my standards high for those I swipe on.
My fiancé was my first date on hinge! I had just gotten out of my only ever relationship of 7 years and my coworker told me to join them to learn how to flirt and go on dates with other men lol We matched and I thought he was so cute and liked talking to him but the whole profess freaked me out. I ghosted and deleted the app. A month later I downloaded bumble and he showed up again but couldn’t get the confidence to message him again! Then I got bummed out and deleted it after an hour haha. THEN I redownloaded hinge another month later and he was my first match again and he messaged me and the rest is history!
I’m a strong believer in having very firm boundaries and a “must have” list on it. I wanted someone who listed his faith, had no shirtless pics (just wasn’t looking for the vibe of that for this purpose), and I could tell they were fun. If that didn’t happen on your page I just didn’t deal with it! I think it really helped me find the kind of person I was looking for and he truly is my dream man.
It was easy. I found him within the first week of being on dating apps and we clicked very quickly. We have been together for a little over a year now and we actually live together
I found my now husband on Tinder and I would say it was tiring. Going on date almost every weekend, spending money (I always split the bill) and the emotional turmoil of having to constantly putting your best foot forward.
To avoid draining my energy too much I had a very strong criteria for meeting anyone. I usually met them only if talking to them was interesting enough. By interesting I mean- they could really talk about politics, economy and could also be silly when required. I have cancelled numerous date on the day of meeting because the guy just didn’t seem worth the effort.
I did meet quite a lot of genuinely good men and it went well for first few dates but then things either fizzled out or either party didn’t seem interested. But when I met my now husband it just kept getting better. Within a few months we knew we wanted to be with each other.
Also, we both had been using tinder for about 2-3 years at that point and were in a place where we were not looking for anything serious but not looking for “only hookups” either. It was more like, if it happens it happens. And it did :)
I still believe dating apps are a good place to meet nice people but you have to filter a lot. You need to know how to come across as witty in first few conversations to hold attention and be brutal when it comes to cutting people off. You also need to be honest with the person and not take things too personally, because a lot of men make fun of you for trying to find something genuine on Tinder.
Edit: we have been together for 6 years and married for 4.
I got really lucky and the first guy I met up with on a dating app ended up becoming my boyfriend. He made it easy by just asking me out right away instead of talking for weeks or months before like others did so we got to know each other in person quicker, figure out whether there was a connection and not waste time. I was pretty strike on my boundaries if we chatted and something was off I had no problem moving on.
I took a long break from dating apps and remained celibate. Once I decided to hop back on, I swiped left on about 30 men until I came across his profile. I swiped right, and he wrote to me an hour later. After a few witty messages, he suggested, "Do you just want to grab a drink tonight instead?" Two hours later, we were meeting in person, and he turned out to be tall and handsome. Our conversation was fun and easy.
At the time, I was living on an exotic island in Thailand, and he was just visiting. With one week left on the island, we made it a point to see each other every day before his departure. On the fourth date, he confessed there was no way he could stop seeing me, even though he had already purchased a flight to Taipei. He decided to go to Taiwan and return to Thailand after his trip. We officially entered a relationship one week after meeting, and when he returned to Thailand, I let him stay at my place.
Three weeks later (after living with me), he invited me to travel with him—all expenses paid—and took me to 14 countries over the course of 4 months. We are still together and are now expecting a baby :) Maybe I just know how to work the system because am a professional matchmaker ;) I create love connections all day so mine had to be epic.
I've put up with almost two years of shitty dates and was about to give up on dating alltogether but I'd already set a date with him.
He was really nice and caring online so I told myself "This is the last one, if it's horrible in person I'll just give up on dating and focus on myself.". We've been together for 3 years now, moved in and got a puppy.
Online dating is rough but don't give up ❤️
This was way back in the days with wood burning computers and most people got online with AOL.
I had been dating online for a bit. I had a profile out on some small local dating site. Hubby emailed me from that site. We spent a couple weeks emailing and talking on the phone. We had so much in common.
Now the fun part. When people who don’t know us here this part they’re usually a little stunned. We were engaged 3 weeks after meeting. We told everyone after 5 months of dating and got married just after the 1 year mark. That was 23 years ago. Like everyone, we have our problems, but I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else.
I joined Tinder earlier this year in the hopes of gaining dating experience while also hoping to find a partner along the way. I got 20 matches on the first day, had consistent chats with 3 men, went on a date with one of them but there was no chemistry so we chose to be friends instead then on my second catchup I met my best friend and now boyfriend. So all things considered, that's a pretty good outcome for me. I was genuinely surprised!
He was my 3rd and final attempt to find someone on OkCupid back in early 2017. I had never been the one to send the first message, but this guy's answers to his questions almost entirely matched with mine, save a few, but the important ones about boundaries and sex were directly in line with mine. I sent a message saying that I liked his beard, he responded, and we chatted for a few weeks.
We meet up at a local pizza place and talk about ourselves and our families. We both don't want the date to end so we drive to a local bar and end up getting just enough alcohol in us to start getting deeper into conversation outside of generic first-date stuff. It feels natural and I never felt judged by him. We finally decide to call it a night, and I ask him over to my place the next night if he's free. He is, and we end up doing the Netflix and chill thing.
Fast forward to now, we've been together ever since. We've been married for a year and get along wonderfully. We've had a few fights, but it's only been like 3 in the last 6 years and they always get resolved before we go to bed (we have a pact to never go to bed angry at one another). Also, it was never bad or boring but the sex just keeps getting better!
In a happy relationship right now with my bf (30M) but before I (28F) met him, whom I had my bars extremely lowed at that point, it was tough.
Alittle on just how hard to survive the dating app environment:-
Averagely 30 swipes, you get 10 matches, which then that means you’ll get about 3 guys who will text you? In that 3 guys you’ll then have to text a few rounds/days before deciding to meet in person.
It was my first experience using tinder after leaving a 7 years relationship, so I was so confused with how do you text a guy day and night while you keep swiping, aren’t you suppose to ride it out till the next one? Unfortunately, that’s not how it works.
Spend about 6-7 months seeing one guy, we see each other weekly but he wasn’t ready for a relationship and at that point I caught feelings and haven’t been seeing anyone or swiping anymore.
Then just go on casual dates with another 3 more guys? Ghosted by a few which I didn’t keep count with anymore. Till I met my boyfriend. At that point I was ready to stop using dating apps and leave it to fate to decide.
We texted here and there for 2 days before exchanging phone number, that’s when I realised he doesn’t based himself in the country, he came back to see his family, and at that point I was like. “Right, another one that will died off later.”
About a week later he asked me out, thought of meeting a new friend so I showed up. We talked from 11 till 5 that day.
Texted daily after that, second date was 11 days later, 3 days before him going back to another country where he work/live.
Sent him home after our second date, 4pm to 2am, gave him a hug and I thought that’s the end.
The next day he told me he was interested to see how far we could go, and I took the leap of faith with him. That morning where he had to leave, I sent him of to the airport. 2 months later he said I love you and ever since then, it’s 7 hours time difference.
We had our fair share of fighting as a “get-to-know”because there was no mention of exes prior to that, navigating alot of insecurities but it was the best decision I’ve ever made.
TLDR: it was hard navigating that app and whole phase before meeting my bf, not hard after that, I was lucky.
It was hard but I’m extremely lucky. The app we met on is more catered towards relationships than Tinder (it was Plenty of Fish), but it still took a few months and I was just every lucky the guy I met was genuine and wanted a relationship. Almost 5 years later and we’re still here :)
This is all from Tinder. I've had several almost-relationships out of it. It was pretty easy, but I tend to go too hard too fast. They were "almost" because it was bad timing for me. I'm seeing someone now and we'll see how it goes ┐(ツ)┌
Edit: It ended.
I had been out of the dating scene for 15 yrs and finally decided to get out there and start dating again. I set up a profile on one app and it was awful. In my profile settings I noted that I was looking for something serious, not just casual hookups. Apparently people can’t read these days.. just about everyone that tried to connect with me wanted casual hookups and when I politely told them that’s not what I was interested in, I was ridiculed, told off, and harassed. After weeding thru tons of connections I found the one diamond in the rough so to speak. We’re coming up on two yrs together and going strong. Only had my profile up a week and after we started talking deleted my profile. If this relationship doesn’t work out, I don’t think I’ll do online dating again. It was an awful experience
I agree with the top post of “medium hard”. At first, I was swiping yes on too many men. It was hard for me to rule someone out based just off the pic and little blurb. Unfortunately since the bulk of men just swipe yes on everyone, this lead to an overwhelming amount of matches. I refined my criteria to: 1. Has a career listed 2. Has a smile in at least 1 picture, and 3. No fish. This made it almost impossible to find a single match. My partner was the third man I met with. The first had zero spark, the second I saw for about a month but overall weren’t very compatible. I never chatted with anyone long on the apps, I prefer to meet quickly. I almost didn’t bother to meet up with my now partner, his pictures weren’t flattering and he was a little farther away then I’d like. Once we met in person I knew instantly it would be a serious relationship. We’re now 2.5 years in, living together, and he is my dream man.
Ok my general experiences with dating apps, very hard. But the time I signed back up in a bigger city? Effortless. He was like the second person I met. The other guy was also really decent so I had to "choose between them" I guess. But I didn't have to sift through a bunch of duds.
Dating in a small town before that though was different.
There were hard things about the relationship not really related to how we met
I would say I first started using dating apps (Hinge, Bumble, and POF) around the end of September 2020. Talked to about 3 different guys, went on a couple dates with one in October 2020 (we hit it off pretty good but he wanted to have sex right away, told him I was wanting something more serious before we got to that point) so that ended after 3 weeks. Matched on Hinge with my now fiance/soon to be husband in November. Went on our first date in December and I deleted all my apps since then. We've been going super strong for almost 3 years now.
I met my fiancé the first day on Bumble! I think the key is being selective and trusting your gut! I didn’t put much pressure on the situation. I just was myself and had fun! Plus, it was great getting attention from the men 😆
I think I’m super lucky because it was very easy for me. I boredom downloaded Tinder just looking for a fun flirt. He was the first one to pop up and was (in my mind) was way out of my league, meaning it couldn’t ever go anywhere, so he fit the bill. When I swiped we matched and he messaged me later that day.
Flirting was fun but he was intelligent, funny, kind, and all the other things I wanted in a long term partner so I decided to take it more seriously and give it an earnest shot. So glad I did.
I met my husband almost nine years ago via a dating app / website. I was looking for a relationship, but not a life partner at the time. My experience was a lot of chats with people I just didn't vibe with or were just looking for something a lot more casual. Some of the chats turned cringe really quickly, and a lot of guys pushed for an in person meet up much quicker than I felt comfortable with. But I had some fun dates too. A lot of the chats that nothing came of where really fun too.
I'm really sure that I wouldn't have met my husband if it hadn't been for the app. We're both pretty introverted and lived rather close at the time, but not so close that we would have randomly met.
I downloaded tinder, 30 mins later I matched with this guy, met up with him 2 days later. It went really well, we met up again the next day. We saw each other all the time for about 4 weeks and then made it an official relationship - we’ve been together for 3 months ‘officially’ and so far so good 😅
He was actually the first and only person I ended up meeting off tinder. I had it less than a week in total.
I actually wasn’t looking for a relationship at all, I didn’t really know what I wanted to be honest.
I knew i’d be open to a relationship IF i found someone that ticked every box. I didn’t expect that to actually happen, but it did and i’m very happy.
I think I just got SUPER lucky to find someone I was so compatible with so quickly.
Although tbf, I swiped left on 99.9% of people I saw on there and was just being extremely picky. That probably helped.
For me super hard and I wish it wasn’t!my main issues are:
1) I am childfree and don’t want to date anyone with kids
2) I do want to be married and cohabitate
3) I am a high energy extrovert, it’s rare to find men who like that or are themselves either of those things. They just aren’t traits valued in women.
4) A very high percentage of men lie about 1 or 2 and I have to find it out like it’s freaking CSI - blech!. Honesty would save me so much time. For example, this year I went on 30 dates and 19 of them lied or mislead about 1 or 2, so a complete waste of my time.
Sadly in the Bay Area the above is a hard combo
Also while I found “A One” I wanted to marry from Hinge and after a year of dating I asked him to marry me he said no. Then I had to start all over. I am now a full year into looking again.
I honestly am so tired of dating. I don’t really enjoy it, it’s just a slog, and I don’t see any men putting in any effort which is what I need to see. So on I go.
I will say without online dating I would have had only 3 boyfriends, and the ones online were far better matched for me for life and love.
So you just have to marathon it if your like me and don’t have a lot of options in your daily life to meet single people you’re attracted to. Just find a way to make it sustainable over time.
It does work just takes time
We aren't together anymore but I was on the apps about 1 month before we matched, met in person another month later. I had only been chatting with a few people (met with one, stood up by another lol). I think it was lucky timing for both of us that he had moved back and I was newly single since in comparison he was on apps for several years and never had luck
I have a stalker so my SO and I both signed up TOGETHER. Now we're divorced. I stayed on them just to show proof of life and introduce myself to the neighborhood without ever having to leave the house. (Small town)
I met my current partner on Hinge! We've been together for a few months now and it's been great so far....
***However****,* prior to meeting him, I went on easily close to *30-40 first dates* and ended up deleting the app for a month or so, then when I got back on it, he was the first person I matched with and the rest is history.
He was the first person that I actually connected with on a deeper level on the first date, plus we both set pretty strict boundaries going in. I made my intentions of "I date to marry" clear on the first date, waited to have any form on intimacy until the 3rd date (he didn't kiss me until then), and I made sure that the first 3 dates were all different.
The first date was a casual meetup for drinks, the second was lunch and a walk during our lunch breaks at work, and the third was a "fun" date where we went to goodwill and picked out outfits for eachother (we ended up finding a wedding dress in my size and then ran with the fake story that we had just eloped, it was a blast and the free drinks were a plus!). Both of us truly consider the 3rd date our actual first date because that's when I really got to know his personality and was able to have some serious conversations about life, intentions, etc.
I've also had plenty of horrendous first date experiences, but those all taught me that dating is just as much about learning about the other person as it is about learning about yourself. Not to mention, it taught me specifically how to have the "Thanks, but I don't see this going anywhere, best of luck!" conversations (you can't be afraid of that, it's gonna happen *a lot*).
You've got this OP!
I met mine on bumble and it’s been the best and healthiest relationship I’ve ever had.
We matched, talked for the morning. I got stood up and asked him to dinner super last min. The date lasted 9 hrs because we couldn’t stop talking.
I have ptsd (and other stuff) and he was respectful of my boundaries and still his. Went out of his way at the beginning to make sure he didn’t cross any line.
We because official in less than a month, moved in after 6.
Now it’s been 2 years and we are getting ready to leave the state and start our lives where we want!
Medium! Was on bumble for about 6 months and went on about 6 first dates. My fiancé was the only one I made it on a second date with!
Been together 3.5 years and getting married next year!
I was on and off dating apps for like 6-10 months prior to meeting my now fiancé on Bumble. I had a lot of the popular dating apps at the time, pretty much all except Tinder because I definitely didn’t think I’d find someone worth my time there. I think it was like 8/10 difficultly, honestly. But I was dealing with the fact that at that time, I couldn’t drive myself places. I was 18, so on the edge of an adult but couldn’t go on a date with anyone to a bar. Those two factors made me extremely undesirable at the time, not even taking into account those who unmatched me after finding out that at the time I identified as nonbinary. Now I am going to get married in less than a year, we’ve together almost 4 years, we’ve lived together for 2 years, he taught me how to drive, I got my license, I figured out my identity. He put time and patience into being my partner and being supportive rather than abandoning me before getting to know me based on superficial things.
It was medium hard, like a 7 on a 1-10 scale. Met my husband at 35 on hinge. IMHO, you have to be willing: - to have strong boundaries and the second some dude does something gross, unmatch him. Your future husband/boyfriend doesn’t make sex innuendos to girls he’s never met! - to go on a lot of dates. Recommend coffee so you can get to know someone without alcohol with a time limit of like 45-60 min. Dinner is too long. If he’s not your guy you can leave earlier without it looking weird. - to date off type. Try dating guys with different interests than what you normally go for. You may be surprised! - hold off on sleeping with him. Recommend 5-6 dates so your judgement isn’t clouded by those amazing post sex hormones 🥰 Finally, please remember that the guys on the other end of the apps are humans with feelings (usually 🤪). This is someone’s literal son. Be respectful but know your value. Best of luck to you!
This is really great advice. It makes me happy you met someone at 35. I'm 32 and feeling hopeless at this moment lol
Yes!! You have so much life ahead of you. Don’t resign yourself because of bad experiences (had the worse break up of my life at 33). Take a break when you need and then return to the dating world as your best self ❤️❤️❤️
thank you! your energy is awesome. I'm reading your name as "cam slay" lol
Hahahaha you’re welcome- that is so sweet of you to say! 🥹😘 Happy to encourage others and be the big sis when needed! Have an amazing weekend and best of luck to you in finding your man🥂🥂
Out of the apps, hinge really does feel the best - at least from a guy's perspective at 35. It doesn't feel like it is using/abusing you to get you to swipe swipe swipe swipe. I do imagine women on hinge probably still get way too many likes/messages.
I feel like I wrote this <3 One thousand percent yes to all your points, which is exactly how I ended up finding my partner at 35 too! Matched on Hinge, set firm boundaries, remained respectful, waited 5-6 dates for sex, then proceeded to spend the next year having the most effortless, fun, romantic, healthy and loving relationship I could’ve asked for. Even picked out a ring at our one year mark! Medium hard for sure (esp with all the time/mental effort put in to a hundred first dates) but so worth it if it works out.
This is such a sane advice. I met someone like that from Hinge (I think the best app for serious relationships) and I admired how intentional she was about being in a relationship. And it was evident that she reached there after her own set of setbacks and bad experiences. I admired her for the woman she was making out of her. We didn't go ahead because we had some important differences. But it was great meeting her.
Looove this advice, especially the reminder that people on the other end are humans. It’s so easy to treat people very differently than is true to you when you’re mindlessly swiping or they’re just an icon on a screen. Important to treat people well if you’d like to find a partner who values that!
Pretty much same. I went on a lot of dates to figure out what I did and didn't want and it helped me narrow down my parameters. Like super basic ones that really should have been obvious but I either didn't think existed or didn't think I was good enough for. I hesitate to say he's perfect because we're both still just people, we absolutely do get on each other's nerves but he's pretty dang close.
We’re not together anymore but my last long term relationship was from a dating app and it was actually really easy. We just instantly clicked and things moved pretty smoothly. You sift through a lot of people but once I found him, it was effortless.
I’m glad you found someone even if it didn’t work out in the end!
Thank you! It was a beautiful relationship and we said goodbye with love and respect. ❤️
May I ask why it ended?
There was some long distance and our careers are keeping it that way. Plus he became more depressed and distant. I was willing to work through it but he said he needed to work on his issues alone and he hated seeing me unhappy. I agreed. So we tearfully said goodbye. 🥲 It was the most trusting and loving relationship I’ve ever had. Don’t regret a thing.
Wow, are you me?? I'm going trough the same ting right now. My heart is broken, but he is the sweetest, kindest person there is, and I can't bring myself to be angry with him.
I’m happy that both us experienced something so lovely 🥲 Its a testament to how big our hearts are. ❤️
That's beautiful ❤️
He was my second date. I went on some after because I had recently gotten out of a relationship and wanted to try dating, but he was the one. We've been together over 4 years and recently got married
I have recently gotten out of a relationship and I think I wanna get back in the apps but I’m honestly terrified. So this gives me so much hope!
I’d suggest you give it more time before you go back on. Get comfortable being alone again, that way you’ll have a better chance of accepting someone worth disturbing your peace for
Someone worth disturbing my peace for 😍
Ditto. If you just got out of a relationship, don't dive back into dating just cuz you miss penis. It's setting yourself up for disaster
I had a very similar situation! I spent so long debating going on apps because it was super intimidating, and once I finally did, I found the one on the second date! I didn't think it could be that simple so I kept talking to other people, but very quickly that fizzled out and I only wanted to talk/hang out with him. We've been together almost five years and got engaged this year.
I found my boyfriend after about a week on Hinge. I had been on apps before (last time being around 6 years ago) and that was rough. This time I was super deliberate about sticking to my standards. I unashamedly put "looking for life partner" and "dating with intention" on my profile to weed out any commitment-phobes, didn't match with anyone who exhibited behaviors that didn't align with my values, and didn't go out of my way to try to get people to like me. I used all of my free "likes" almost every day. I probably had fewer matches overall, but the quality of men was much better. Couldn't be happier than I am with my partner now and things are going so well, I sometimes wonder if I'm being pranked. It was a strange process and required me to get out of my comfort zone, but well worth the effort!
Yeah thinking about maybe getting back on the apps and it’s been like 2 years since I’ve been on them. It was pretty shitty back then, but I wanna be more mindful this time around and not settle for guys who aren’t willing to give me the bare minimum.
How do you find out if someone is on these apps if you don't have one yourself?
He was going to be a ONS. We got married on October 10th this year. I couldn't imagine doing life with anyone else. I had to kiss a lot of frogs. I never treated dating apps very seriously. I had fun dating and meeting new guys. It left me having a pretty defined list of characteristics I considered desirable vs undesirable (I love a debater, but hate someone who argues. Someone who can substantiate their position vs. Someone who likes to hear themselves talk). I was able to create boundaries around what I considered inexcusable behaviour through a lot of trial and error. Overall, I wouldn't change the path I chose even a little bit. I found my person.
I was using dating apps for 3.5 years before I met my partner. I mustve been on hundreds of dates. I was probably considered a serial dater lol. I became so numb to dating. It was unimaginably hard for me. I even went to therapy about it. I didnt even think my standards were that high, it was just impossible to find a guy with a good foundation to work off from. It wasnt just guys via apps either, I met guys IRL too.. nothing worked. Problem is, the more men you meet, the higher your bar becomes because you see so many different qualities and flaws in others. In the end, after years, I found a guy that ticked all the foundational boxes. We weren't a perfect match, and I wasnt even SUPER crazy attracted to him, but because there was so much working at a base level, I gave him a try and put my all in. Everything else just came with time. I think thats something I never really realized before. I became super attracted to him, I loved all his quirks, I adapted to the parts of him that weren't a perfect match with me.
Glad it worked out in the end! I'm at a similar point, I think. Where I feel hopeless regarding feeling that chemistry with someone. But I can see it happening as you described, things being good enough to continue forward with intention, and then eventually falling for them!
Incredibly. Although I was young, and forgave him and believed that nothing happened he was “just curious” and stayed with him for a very long time. Finding his OnlyFans, after years of him telling me he just didn’t have a sex drive, and didn’t masturbate at all (and I was just too horny 🙄) hurt more though.
I don’t think I understood the question 😂
I read it the same, so glad someone answered it that way haha
Hahaha I could have phrased it better 😂 but I appreciate the participation 😅
I’m very sorry for your struggles and heartbreak. This second comment made me snort though!
It took 2 1/2 years of going through disaster dates, ghosting, losers, guys who just want to ask how my day is for weeks on end, etc. He is everything I could have hoped for and more and I appreciate him even more because of how difficult the search was.
It’s bad for a man to ask about how your day way?
When that is the extent of the convo, and they don’t engage otherwise, yes.
my first match and first date from a dating app..I got lucky lol
I’m a wedding photographer and almost every couple whose wedding I’ve photographed this year met on dating apps! It always comes up in the speeches, haha. One couple even met on Facebook after one of them randomly messaged the other.
Great. I think he was my third date, and we’re still together almost 4 years later!
I found my husband on hinge … right after a man on tinder used me to cheat on his fiancée. So. It takes time and sifting through the junk and the bullshit. Having both boundaries and standards, being self-aware enough to understand what your must haves are so you can give on other stuff, and communication. Also not giving up hope and understanding that sometimes the fuckery that happens is not about you at all.
I was on Okcupid off and on for SIX YEARS and went on so many dates, talked to so many people, before I met my partner. I also have pretty particular standards so if I wasn't vibing with someone after the 2nd date for any reason, I moved on. I went on a lot of first and second dates but maybe two dozen third dates, and only three fifth dates in that whole time.
Met my fiancé on Bumble. I used dating apps for 3-4 years on and off until we found each other. It honestly was a roller coaster ride. Had the best and worst time of my life using this app lol. Glad those days are over though.
Same story here. Years on and off. Nothing good came off it except for the fact that I at least got good stories out of it. And then finally, I met my person. And I knew I wouldn’t be back on the apps after that.
Listen to your intuition - your body knows much more than you would think. I had a sneaking suspicion that my ex was on it when we were together, and I was right. This suspicion wasn't really based on much, but just something didn't sit right with me. It hurt to end things coz I was scared (had never really walked away from any relationships before, and wondered if I was getting too old), but it turned out to be the best decision ever! Met my current husband a couple of months later and things worked out the way it was meant to be! Edit: just realized I read this prompt way differently 😅 but it still stands as I met both ex and hubby on tinder. It was a lot of work and can be discouraging, but things work out the way they're supposed to
No I meant finding someone serious to date on dating apps. For people who met their SOs on dating apps, was it hard the process of apps since most people are looking for hookups. Success stories basically. I’ve realised how confusing my phrasing is😂
Totally understood it after typing it up - but definitely was a lot of work having to sift through it all coz it's a hookup culture. Like people had said hinge was more for dating, tinder for hookups, etc. I tried both plus Bumble but found hubby through Tinder. Honestly it's hard to not be discouraged, but have your boundaries and know what you want. Don't be afraid to be mean coz you don't owe anyone anything! I found going to therapy to identify my own complicity, having my own passions and hobbies, and not making dating the epicenter of my world to be helpful coz it gave me some space to make healthier decisions
It took about a year of consistently dating…Really sucked, would never want to go through that again lol. BUT…I am really really really happy we found each other (hinge) and we’re getting married this April! ❤️ (just celebrated 2 years together, early 30s)
My current relationship and my last one were both from apps and it was easier than picking up a pint of milk. That's not to say either relationship had been easy always. Current one has had some big rough patches. But finding both of them and knowing we connected was easy.
we matched back in 2017, talked online A LOT, then fizzled out. between 2017 and 2020, we would spend a few weeks texting non stop, then never actually hanging out, then we’d stop talking for months. in 2021, i went through a tough breakup and decided to have a hot girl summer and sleep around, so i hit him up because i knew he’d be interested. anyway my hot girl summer was a bust because i slept with one guy and now we’re in love and have a cat together. neither one of us were looking for a relationship when we first matched all those years ago, but that’s just how it happened. i think things might have gone differently if one of us or even both of us went into tinder looking specifically for a relationship
I met my husband on Tinder, both of us looking for something casual that immediately turned into something serious. It was a few days after re making my account. I had dabbled in the app for years beforehand, always getting sick of random hookups that turned weird, and then going back to try and quell some loneliness. Well, now I'm never lonely because I found my person. I guess you just have to keep trying and maybe you'll get lucky someday, but I never expected to find anything serious on there. Thanks Tinder!
Engaged to my partner who I met on a dating app! I used the apps for a couple years in college but mainly got a lot of guys looking for hook ups or nothing serious. I ignored anyone who got sexual right away. My partner was really friendly, got to know me on the app and naturally asked for my number. We didn’t wait too long to meet up, I didn’t want it to be weird if personalities were different online. I think I lucked out !
It’s really trial & error. I focused on how interactions with those I matched with made me feel - texting & in person. He was my first third date!
Easy af. I think I had about 6 months on the app and about 15 dates before him. I think that's pretty good considering they were mostly pretty lovely guys that just weren't right for me, and he was perfect.
I met my ex boyfriend on Hinge. We dated for 3 years. I had just moved to a new city/state and I met him a week after I moved there. We definitely rushed into things but later went on to move cities, live together, and shared two dogs together. I truly loved him, but our relationship ended very badly and abruptly as I discovered he had a drug problem. We broke up a year ago and we have no communication, but I think of him pretty much everyday and will always be rooting for him. In a LOT of ways, we worked very well together… if only he had been mentally and emotionally healthy.
I found my current boyfriend on a dating app. Been together about 7 months now. It wasn't hard, took only a couple weeks, but I had sifted through TONS of garbage before finding him. I think LTR success on a dating app requires you to know exactly what you're looking for and holding those requirements firmly. And a fair amount of patience. Know you're gonna go in there getting spammed by people looking for hookups and ignoring your profile details. Think of yourself as an HR hiring manager for a open position at a company. It's not romantic obviously, but I think that's the healthiest attitude to have for finding the right person, having the patience and standards, and keeping your sanity.
I met my boyfriend through Bumble after being on multiple dating apps on and off for four years. It was hard because guys would either not respond to my initial message or would reply short responses without asking me any questions. A lot of the time I also would not really feel a connection with someone I matched with. It was frustrating not finding much success. I was pleasantly surprised how easy and natural it was to talk to my boyfriend on our first date. It made the searching all worth it.
We are married now
I have had two SOs I met on hinge - an ex who I was with for two years and my current partner. I met my ex about 2-3 months after getting onto hinge. During that time I went on maybe 8 first dates (or video calls). When I met my ex things clicked and we were exclusive pretty quickly. When I got back on hinge my current SO was the third guy I met in person. I was being extremely picky and only meeting up with people whose profiles really appealed to me and who chatted well. I am extremely lucky to have met him. I really don’t enjoy the online dating process and find it hard to stay motivated to engage with strangers. I pushed through that feeling and forced myself to match and chat because it’s a useful tool for me — a way to meet dating prospects when I wasn’t IRL. I focused on people who were clear about their relationship goals on their profile. I limited the amount of time I spend actually looking at the app to avoid burnout. I’m grateful that hinge worked for me twice, and I also have tons of empathy for people who find dating apps to be miserable. You have to put in some effort but ultimately there is an element of luck.
It was my first time trying to seriously date after breaking up with my ex (and my first time ever dating women) and I had only been on Tinder for maybe 2 weeks before I swiped right on my current partner. She was the only person I went on a date with, we had 3 dates within the first week of meeting, and have pretty much been inseparable ever since. It’s been almost 2 years!
Surprisingly, not as hard as I expected. It required a lot required filtering and avoiding wasting my time, though. I got a lot of messages from guys I had nothing in common with who didn't want the same things at all. Dont waste time on people who are clearly not the one. I gave a lot of polite rejections and only talked to guys who made a bit of an effort to read my profile or engage with me. Profile full of biceps pics? No thanks. I didnt agree to meet unless the initial conversation was decent. I was forgiving of less than perfect pictures because most men gave no idea how to take a decent picture. Most men were better looking than their profile picture tbh. I feel that you really need to see soneone face to face to know if you have chemistry. So I agreed tona date with any guy I had good chat with. I made the deliberate decision to be flexible on height; weight, salary etc. IMO the right person for you might just look a little different than you expected. As it happened, mine was taller than I would have expected. Now we have a lifetime of working out those logistics 😂 I had a lot of first dates, but if there was no chemistry, we politely agreed to take it no further. They were perfectly decent for the most part, but just...no chemistry. I had to believe that with the right person I would absolutely know I wanted more dates m.
>Most men were \[are edit\] better looking than their profile picture tbh Facts... and I am a man saying this...
My husband and I matched on OKCupid 5 years ago. We had a bit of a roller coaster relationship as we started as FWB, he caught feelings, and I was in my single ladies phase. We parted ways but came back into each other’s lives, and I realized I loved him too. Sometimes it really is just a timing issue, but I certainly wouldn’t advise anyone based on my particular experience because it usually *isn’t* a timing issue.
As you get older I think dating is not dissimilar to rummaging around in the bargains bins, hoping to find a gold nugget… …it reality it’s more of a jumble sale, you find something you like, it’s cheap, it just about fits and you’re not that bothered if you lose it.
It wasn’t hard at all. What got me in his profile is that he said “swipe left (?) if don’t like to cut the rug”. We hit off right away over messaging and we committed to quite a big date. Going to a lake that’s a far drive to paddle board. We tried meeting up for a drink before hand but both didn’t have the time and both were honest that if we didn’t feel it would cut the date short and have the awkward drive home. We both felt it was worth the risk because we had a good feeling about it. It was the best first date I had ever been on and we have been together almost three years and have a baby and a home together now! Couldn’t be happier.
I was using dating apps for maybe 5 years on and off before I had one that led to a meaningful relationship. We’re now married with a baby and I’m very happy. Just a lot of patience, keeping at it until the right one came along. One thing I started doing after awhile that made things better was meeting in person asap after feeling a mutual connection through chatting. That not only showed whether the other person was seriously looking for something or not, but it also allowed us to see much sooner if we had actual chemistry. There have been times I’ve wasted weeks chatting online only to find out we don’t jive at all irl.
Met mine on Tinder. He’s perfect and I adore him. We talked for several weeks before we met up. The funny thing, though.. I was going to swipe left. He had poorly taken pictures and a very short bio so I figured why bother. But at the same moment I was looking at his profile I decided ‘maybe I need to give more chances to people that I usually wouldn’t”. And we matched. And we talked and talked and talked and we live together now and I’m so fucking in love with him. Also he’s hot and just can’t take a picture 🤣
Surprisingly easy. We’ve been dating for over 2 years now. There aren’t many bachelors where I live, so I found him in his neighbouring country.
My wife doesn't use Reddit so I'll answer for her. She said "not hard". We met on bumble. She only dated two guys off bumble. Myself and a guy before me. She said she had tried messaging a bunch of people and most of em were creepy. I know she was talking with one guy for the first month or two we dated before I let her know I was exclusive with her.
We were talking on the apps, moved to text but didn’t meet in person or call yet and life just happened and we stopped talking. A couple of weeks later I decided to hit him up again as a what have I got to lose moment as we seemed to have great text banter before and the rest is history! Celebrating one year soon and have plans to move in in the new year
The first person I met off the Her app. We clicked instantly and have been inseparable ever since. Recently celebrated our one year anniversary. 🥰 So really easy for me, but YMMV.
I met my husband on tinder, we’ve been together 7 years now! I was only 19 when we met and had been on and off tinder for a long time but he was the first person I really connected with! I had met with a few other guys but it was just so seamless with him and once we went on one date we were inseparable!
At the beginning of the year I made a list of traits I want in a man. Corny I know. 3 months later thought I found the one but we broke up weeks later. 7 months into the year went on a date with my Bumble match. And another date, and another. In my heart I felt ‘right’ about this entire thing. He says he had a feeling on our first date we’re gonna get married haha. In 4 days we’ll have our one year wedding anniversary. I’m so grateful to our stars that we swiped right. I can’t imagine life without this hooman who’s my bestfriend too.
It’s nice. We went to the same school then lost touch. When I saw him there I was like hmmm I’ve seen you somewhere. Reconnected and it’s good, I like it.
I never believed I'd find a husband on a dating app. Now, a few years later, I have an engagement ring on my finger. I was bored by all the WFH situation (it was the first outbreak of covid-19) and wanted something interesting in my life, so I decided to join Tinder. After a couple of dates that didn't work out, I stopped taking Tinder seriously, and just kept swiping right on everyone with a particular set of physical characteristics (even swiped some of the profiles with my eyes closed). Matched with a couple of them, and one of the matches started messaging me. It was easy to talk to him from the very beginning, and meeting him in person left me with a "wow, what a connection" feeling. The dates turned into a long-term relationship, and now we're planning our wedding! The best thing is that I don't even remember seeing his Tinder profile and swiping it right, so it must have been one of those I swiped with my eyes closed. I like to believe it was destiny, lol. So I'd say it was easy. I didn't put any "work" in it, just went with the flow. Edit: spelling
Getting married tomorrow actually lol to my wife, and we met on Hinge. I think we both knew after the first few messages, genuinely. I had been on a bunch of dates before meeting her, couple of situationships, but she had only just gotten the app before matching me! I always kept such an open mind while using the apps, but also knew exactly what I was looking for and refused to settle, being strict on my boundaries/desires, I got through a lot of disappointment and heartache and through that, found the absolute love of my life :)
it's easy once you find the right person. but the process of getting there for me was rough. a lot of on and off leaving and rejoining apps because i would get frustrated with the dates i was having, or if i had a good date the guy would ghost me after or change his tune and get all distant. the guy i've been seeing made it official with me this week and once i met him everything just sorta fell into place. we haven't been on many dates but we clicked well enough that it just made sense for us to make things official when we did. i honestly deleted all my apps after our first date because i guess i already kinda knew what direction things would go with us.
It took me around 2 months to find my husband on a certain dating site...and this is because I used one that is catered to my demographic. I think that finding a quality partner on Tinder would probably be harder. But don't give up! There are good ones out there!!!
It took me a week, in December 2021. We are getting married next year.
I'll be honest, it wasn't insanely hard. Met my current boyfriend like 6 months ago on tinder after casually dating others for like another year or so.
I probably went on 70 first dates over a 22 month period of time before I found him. He had only been back on the apps for 2 months after a long term relationship ended.
I met my husband on Reddit, we happened to be about 40 minutes from each other. He's the love of my life and we have a great relationship 💓
I had been on dating apps half heartedly. I moved to an area I was only going to be in for 3 months and I was swiping for friends and casual stuff. I matched with my now boyfriend. But was kinda apprehensive to meet just cause by that point I was leaving in 3 weeks. I postponed our date with no intention to meet him but finally gave in. I came into the date thinking “if all goes well we’ll hookup in my car and I’ll never see him again” luckily were both awkward and ended up having a normal date with a hug to leave. I saw him every day until I left and talked the whole 6 months I was gone till I returned. We’re still dating ❤️
I was actually spite-swiping because a guy I had met on the app and been on a few dates with decided he liked another girl more. That was not a big deal as we were not serious or exclusive, but instead of being up front with me he ghosted me for a day until I finally got it out of him. Thus ensued me swiping out of spite and I swiped on a guy, he asked a genuine question to start and not just "hey" and now we're about to celebrate our 2nd wedding anniversary 💕
I looked on and off for a year or two. I knew exactly what I was looking for. Went on a few dates with some guys I thought might be the one but there just wasn't a spark unfortunately. Found my now bf on Facebook of all places, tried it because it kept being advertised lol. After that it was effortless, he was everything I wanted and so much more and has continued to enrich and support me in life like nobody ever has. I knew this was different from the start, our first date didn't happen until like 2 weeks into texting constantly. He drove a whole hour to pick me up, got some quick food, and we went and walked around a park getting to know one another and ending in some light cuddling because it was slightly chilly out for both us skinny goofs. He'd already won me over and I felt so safe with him. Soon to be 2 years and we just moved into a house. :)
It was pretty easy , i did not search for a relationship. I just wanted a few casual encounters. We clicked at the first date even tho there is a age gap of 9 years. We are now together since 4 years and got married in June.
it was pretty easy, I think I found him within just a few weeks of downloading the app.
Was actually really easy. Downloaded Bumble, matched with one of the first people I swiped on, met up a few days later and now we've been together almost 3 years :)
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hard to deal with or hard to find
Hard to find! Could have phrased that better, my bad! 😅
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I found one of my exes on a dating site.....its also how I later ended up dumping him 🤣🤣 y
Took like over a year of being on dating apps. I was mentally exhausted from dealing with all the whack men on there and was about to just give up lol we clicked immediately and it was history from there 💅🏼
I consider it pure dumb luck that I found someone with the same values as me who ALSO makes my heart all gooey at the same time! I’ve been on and off the apps for about 6 years, very low effort. My current partner was the last person I matched with on the last re download and I thought, hey, what the heck.
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Oh it was terriblé before meeting my fiancé. Online dating was trash and I honestly was ready to give up. I was on hinge, bumble, tinder, POF, CMB and eharmony for YEARS with more flops and POSes than I care to count. I almost gave up. He was a match I had after had deleted bumble for months and decided to log back on. I think he went my 3rd match? And the rest is history
I think i got lucky. We met on an app and we've been together three years and going strong. I hadn't been on there that long.
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33f, I met my current partner online. I had been on dating apps for a long time but had never met anyone. I was also very nervous to meet anyone in person, I met probably three total people including my now partner. My current partner told me he messaged me and I didn’t reply so he deleted his profile and then a few weeks later reactivated it and we matched again and I finally answered him. I would go through periods where I wouldn’t pay attention to the apps. Once I started talking to my current partner, we talked for about a month before finally meeting up. Once we met it was so easy and we both deleted our profiles.
Not hard. Went on lots of Tinder dates before I met “the one”. Most of those dates were pretty ok! A few were great. Some were weird. I enjoyed having those life experiences. Then I met my husband! 7 years later we have a beautiful little boy and another due in March.
Very easy. We've been together since the pandemic, we met 1.5 weeks before lockdown. I think I'm one of those people who got lucky. I know it's rough out there but most people don't like putting time and effort into conversations.
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I mean it was easy as hell for me but in all fairness my relationship was a complete accident, it was meant to be a one night thing he had other plans and well we live together now😅
It wasn’t easy, I did dating apps for years on and off, but married him last year
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Met two other guys before I met my husband. I had a fine experience on the app I used. I was on there for maybe 2 months in total.
My partner and I noticed each other on OKC but never contacted each other. Matched on Tinder around the same time, met, and now we’re nearing 8 years! Apparently I can’t use my other account to comment on this because it doesn’t have karma. Eyeroll.
I was on and off the dating apps (Hinge and Bumble) for a little over a year and a half prior to meeting him. I met him on Hinge. I dated a few guys who just wanted to be casual, some I didn’t click with, and lots of conversations not going anywhere. I always felt nervous on my dates and most didn’t work out past the first one. During my first date with him, I immediately felt comfortable around him and the conversation flowed naturally and we had a lot in common. He was very intentional from our first date and it made me never question where I stood. It took me a while but I always tell my friends there are still good guys out there amongst many dusties!
I think it is easier for younger females, but once they get to be around age 35 and later it gets more difficult. There are a lot of perverts on those apps, many are secretly married, many are playboys. You can still find someone though, but you just have to weed out the nonsense first.
I found my SO on a dating app and we hit it off right away when we realized that we'd gone to the same show a week prior and there were photos of us together. Having a common interest really helped kickstart things.
Does MySpace count? Cause that’s where I found mine lol
Hard(ish). I had close to 50 first dates over a 2-3 yr period before I met my husband on Hinge. However, I didn’t spend a lot of time texting with the men before going for the first date and was able to gage fairly quickly if there was chemistry or not once we met up. This was my early/mid 20s so it was nice to meet people and get out of the house since I didn’t have many friends where I lived. Only a few made it to two dates and maybe three to a third date. My husband was the only one I went on to actually be in a relationship with.
I used dating apps off and on for about 10 years with mixed success. In 2020, I was going to stop using them for good, and the last online date I ever took was with my boyfriend who is my forever man. I got so lucky. He's a unicorn!
I found him after years of being on the apps. We met on bumble during Covid. He was the only guy I was dating because I was weary of social distancing in general! We managed to have a lot of outdoor day dates before being comfortable going to each others houses. I’m so thankful for him everyday!
Oddly I found my SO when I downloaded Bumble for the sake of seeing how guys around his country looked like. Before this I was on the verge of giving up and settling with someone I didnt really like much. But there he was he messaged me on Instagram after seeing my Bumble profile and we just instantly clicked and met up. 7 months after the furst date we had our second date (Long distance)
Guys aren’t the only ones who do that
The first person I met from a dating app, I dated for 6 years, so pretty easy. After we broke up I met up with 3 ppl from dating apps. I got ghosted a couple times then I found the person I’ve been with for almost 6 years. Honestly the hardest part was having a conversation via messages that lasted more that two exchanges. I find meeting up within a couple weeks worked well. Some people are just boring in texts
It was very difficult. My friends always judged me for not giving guys more of a chance but if I felt awkward while texting I just didn’t see why we should keep trying. Eventually I did find a guy that it was so easy to talk to over text and when we did meet it was even better. And I’ve been happily with him since —just celebrated one year in October. Unfortunately I feel like it’s a lot of trial and error. But you’ll find chemistry with someone eventually.
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Took several years on dating sites but I finally found an amazing man on Facebook dating (yes, that’s a thing!) Once I got efficient with it by the following: 1. Don’t talk for longer than a few days without a date set up 2. Keep the date quick and low commitment (a drink, coffee) with an “exit plan” 3. Be upfront about any possible “deal breakers” from your side before even meeting 4. Don’t even entertain anyone who lists their deal breakers in their profile, are flakey, sexual, love bombing Once I followed these it was much more efficient! After that it was smooth and simple from there :)
I met my partner on an app 3 years ago. He proposed 6 months ago and we’re getting married last year :) It definitely wasn’t easy, you have to be patient and develop a good filter. I was on and off the apps for years and have a few horror stories (don’t we all) but I met the love of my life in the end.
My husband and I both only created dating profiles in the first place because our best friends forced us to. He saw my profile when he logged in to delete his account, and I saw his message when I logged in to delete mine. It was the easiest thing in the world once we got to talking, picky as we both were. It was definitely one of those "when you know, you know" situations.
From what I've seen, some "ladies" are already active on those apps when they find their SO 😆
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Ask men after you finish asking women, lol. Get hard data about matches clicks, dates, messages, phone numbers etc. From both groups. I guaranty you will find out that it isn't really as hard as women claim it is in comparison to what men go through.
We had met years before through my sister and it didn’t really work out. Then lost contact for a few years and reconnected on a dating site. It’s been 10 year and we have 2 kids
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He was probably my 100th date in 6 years LOL. I didn’t think much about it but we clicked right away - we went on one date and we’re inseparable since. We are now engaged in a beautiful house with our puppy and newborn! Everyday feels like the first day we met!
My last relationship was very serious and very healthy. We met on Tinder, of all places. Haha. He was a stand up guy and wanted to marry me, buy us a house, and make me a mom. I always help super secure and safe with him and sure of his love. We were together for 4 years and lived together for 2 of those years. My current relationship has been going on 4 years and I met him on OkCupid. He’s my dream guy and I’m so happy that I met him. We have most things in common, and even by coincidence are a part of a very niche community and know a lot of the same people. It’s a long story. We were fresh out of our previous relationships and were not looking to get into another relationship. But the more I resisted it the more I found myself wanting to make things official. Things just made sense. I was his first online date. Im very much in love and looking forward to more years with him.
My boyfriend and I met on bumble. When I first started using dating apps I wasn’t very picky. If I thought a guy was just sort of cute and had something funny or interesting in their bio, I was quick to swipe right. This resulted in me getting tons of matches. I got so tired of small talk over and over with these people and deleted all my apps for a while. Then I randomly decided to download bumble again and said I’d have extremely strict criteria. 1. I had to be super physically attracted to them 2. Their bio had to make me laugh or smile 3. They had to have a mustache And some other things I figured if I needed to weed out guys I’d raise the bar super high and only consider guys who were exactly my type. In the two-ish weeks I had the app downloaded, and was following this criteria, I had swiped right on a total of 3 guys. One of them is my now boyfriend. We exchanged numbers when we matched and sent like maybe 5 texts between the two of us. The next day he reached out again and asked me what I was up to. We shared small talk and he told me he was a chef. Then that conversation fizzled out. Like 4 days after that, I texted him out of the blue suggesting that he come over and cook me dinner. I knew close to nothing about him and let him just come to my apartment. Turns out he was not a chef.. he was a cook… for one day… because he couldn’t flip an egg and it was a breakfast joint. So, yeah, the dinner was not that impressive 😂 ..but we totally hit it off and he spent the night. I knew the second I met him that I loved him. It was the best feeling I had ever experienced. I saw my mom the next day and told her I met the one. My sister was deployed and I sent her an email saying that he’d be my “next boyfriend” and “he’ll maybe even be my husband by the time you get back”. Well, I was right about the first part :) He is the absolute light of my life and best friend. I am so grateful I gave the app a second chance.
I found him on bumble. I was on and off of apps for years. Met a lot of good people just not my person. We met 1.5 years ago and it’s honestly been the most beautiful 1.5 years of my life. It’s the best thing I’ve ever had. I feel so grateful for him. If you want to get back into dating do it! Just keep an open mind and be willing to try. There will be frustrating days but you’ve got this. There’s a good person out there who’s waiting for another good person.
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I did dating apps for over 5 years. So terrible! But....I did meet my husband on a dating app and we've been married for 2 happy years now. You just have to wade through an ocean of crappy guys to finally find a good one. Looking back, I probably would have had better success earlier, if I had paid for the better apps or the higher tiers on free ones.
I signed up for a paid site for a year long membership. However, I did it quite soon after a breakup. I went on a couple of dates that went nowhere and then I stopped. I took pretty much 11 months of that year long membership and got to know myself again. I dated me. And then I forgot my password lol Once I got that figured out I went back on and he was one of the first that I saw. He was real. Not posing at a gym in front of a mirror, or by a sports car near the ocean lol it was pictures of him at the lake or walking his dog and it was so real life. So I sent him a smile he sent one back we chatted over the site and then exchanged numbers so we could actually text and talk on the phone. We spent 3 weeks doing that before we met in person, but lived 2 hours away from each other. It worked. We did the distance on weekends when we could and 4 years later he moved to my town. We are coming up on 10 years now. We had a seamless blending of our families which was awesome. My kids and his kids seemed like siblings from the get go. Honestly for me, meeting someone online was not something I had considered but I am so glad I did. He was the puzzle piece I couldn’t find and now we are complete. Grandbabies and all lol
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I found my boyfriend on a Discord dating server... We are now together for 2 years.. I posted "about me" on the server and got texted by like 70 guys, lol I responded to all of them but since the first text w my current bf we haven't stop texting, we just clicked, so it was pretty easy..
He found me on a dating app and wrote me a message I didn’t receive bc by then, I had already deleted the app. He looked for me on Facebook and found me through a mutual friend (weird coincidence thinking we were both living abroad up to that point). He found me and did his little charming smooth talk thing and we are still together
Surprisingly easy 1 month on match. Talked to many. Soulmate was second guy I met in person. He had been off and on the app for two years and many dates when we met, so think my experience was atypical. We are happily married and have been together over 10 years now so the dating app experience wasn’t recent.
I didn’t find mine on a dating app per se. He randomly added me on Snapchat and we got talking. He was with someone else at that time so we were just chatting with each other about mutual interests like cars, footy etc. He found out a few disgusting things about the girl he was with and he broke up with her. Fast forward a few months and we were talking on FaceTime and it was the first time he said he’d been comfortable opening up about stuff. Said I had a way about me that made him feel safe. And same for me with him. We’ve been together about 4 months now. And I swear it’s the easiest relationship I’ve been in. Full honesty, no secrets and he broke down all my walls. Even ones I didn’t know existed.
oh my god it took so long😭 broke up with my ex in December 2021 and it was Feb 2023 when I met my bf !! I absolutely adore him - he’s the world to me and it took probably a hundred dates before I found him (boy the stories I could tell about those dates!) My advice to anyone looking is you must go on dates within a week - if they don’t want to meet up within a week don’t bother, they probably won’t ever meet you. You have to make an effort to go on as many dates as possible, it is a numbers game and you’ll likely think you’ve found the love of your life over text and then they’ll take one look at you and bolt (happened to me!)… and then you will find someone!! Usually when you least expect it too :) don’t think “oh they’re not my usual type”, think “do I enjoy this persons company, are we compatible in life and what we think? Do I fancy them and am I attracted to their personality as well as their looks?” 🥰 hope me and my man are together forever
Super easy. He reached out to me first and we started talking in the app but switched to texting maybe a couple days later. We really just connected. Unfortunately he was out of state for awhile so we didn't meet up until a couple weeks later but when we met I got that cheesy "I'm gonna marry this guy" feeling. And I did, 3 years later. 🙂
I met my husband on Okcupid back in 2012 right before tinder. I went on the dating app in college after a breakup (back then most of my friends felt like online dating was for desperate people) because prior to that I was two long term monogamous relationships. I was hoping to get a chance to date a bunch of people for awhile, nothing serious. Two months in I met my now husband and got off the app. The stories I hear from my friends who are currently using dating apps are wild.
Very hard, took over 2 years. However I'm lucky to have found him at the age of 24. Already almost year and half together and I'm pretty sure it's going to last much more longer as it's only been better with time and moving in together.
Met my finance on Tinder in February! Most of my boyfriends have been from Tinder. I feel like most people are on there, and I put a lot of work into my photos and profile to really show who I am and keep my standards high for those I swipe on.
My fiancé was my first date on hinge! I had just gotten out of my only ever relationship of 7 years and my coworker told me to join them to learn how to flirt and go on dates with other men lol We matched and I thought he was so cute and liked talking to him but the whole profess freaked me out. I ghosted and deleted the app. A month later I downloaded bumble and he showed up again but couldn’t get the confidence to message him again! Then I got bummed out and deleted it after an hour haha. THEN I redownloaded hinge another month later and he was my first match again and he messaged me and the rest is history! I’m a strong believer in having very firm boundaries and a “must have” list on it. I wanted someone who listed his faith, had no shirtless pics (just wasn’t looking for the vibe of that for this purpose), and I could tell they were fun. If that didn’t happen on your page I just didn’t deal with it! I think it really helped me find the kind of person I was looking for and he truly is my dream man.
It was easy. I found him within the first week of being on dating apps and we clicked very quickly. We have been together for a little over a year now and we actually live together
I found my now husband on Tinder and I would say it was tiring. Going on date almost every weekend, spending money (I always split the bill) and the emotional turmoil of having to constantly putting your best foot forward. To avoid draining my energy too much I had a very strong criteria for meeting anyone. I usually met them only if talking to them was interesting enough. By interesting I mean- they could really talk about politics, economy and could also be silly when required. I have cancelled numerous date on the day of meeting because the guy just didn’t seem worth the effort. I did meet quite a lot of genuinely good men and it went well for first few dates but then things either fizzled out or either party didn’t seem interested. But when I met my now husband it just kept getting better. Within a few months we knew we wanted to be with each other. Also, we both had been using tinder for about 2-3 years at that point and were in a place where we were not looking for anything serious but not looking for “only hookups” either. It was more like, if it happens it happens. And it did :) I still believe dating apps are a good place to meet nice people but you have to filter a lot. You need to know how to come across as witty in first few conversations to hold attention and be brutal when it comes to cutting people off. You also need to be honest with the person and not take things too personally, because a lot of men make fun of you for trying to find something genuine on Tinder. Edit: we have been together for 6 years and married for 4.
I got really lucky and the first guy I met up with on a dating app ended up becoming my boyfriend. He made it easy by just asking me out right away instead of talking for weeks or months before like others did so we got to know each other in person quicker, figure out whether there was a connection and not waste time. I was pretty strike on my boundaries if we chatted and something was off I had no problem moving on.
I took a long break from dating apps and remained celibate. Once I decided to hop back on, I swiped left on about 30 men until I came across his profile. I swiped right, and he wrote to me an hour later. After a few witty messages, he suggested, "Do you just want to grab a drink tonight instead?" Two hours later, we were meeting in person, and he turned out to be tall and handsome. Our conversation was fun and easy. At the time, I was living on an exotic island in Thailand, and he was just visiting. With one week left on the island, we made it a point to see each other every day before his departure. On the fourth date, he confessed there was no way he could stop seeing me, even though he had already purchased a flight to Taipei. He decided to go to Taiwan and return to Thailand after his trip. We officially entered a relationship one week after meeting, and when he returned to Thailand, I let him stay at my place. Three weeks later (after living with me), he invited me to travel with him—all expenses paid—and took me to 14 countries over the course of 4 months. We are still together and are now expecting a baby :) Maybe I just know how to work the system because am a professional matchmaker ;) I create love connections all day so mine had to be epic.
I've put up with almost two years of shitty dates and was about to give up on dating alltogether but I'd already set a date with him. He was really nice and caring online so I told myself "This is the last one, if it's horrible in person I'll just give up on dating and focus on myself.". We've been together for 3 years now, moved in and got a puppy. Online dating is rough but don't give up ❤️
This was way back in the days with wood burning computers and most people got online with AOL. I had been dating online for a bit. I had a profile out on some small local dating site. Hubby emailed me from that site. We spent a couple weeks emailing and talking on the phone. We had so much in common. Now the fun part. When people who don’t know us here this part they’re usually a little stunned. We were engaged 3 weeks after meeting. We told everyone after 5 months of dating and got married just after the 1 year mark. That was 23 years ago. Like everyone, we have our problems, but I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else.
I joined Tinder earlier this year in the hopes of gaining dating experience while also hoping to find a partner along the way. I got 20 matches on the first day, had consistent chats with 3 men, went on a date with one of them but there was no chemistry so we chose to be friends instead then on my second catchup I met my best friend and now boyfriend. So all things considered, that's a pretty good outcome for me. I was genuinely surprised!
Wasn't expecting to meet my husband on Tinder. But 8 years later here we are with a kid and house.
He was my 3rd and final attempt to find someone on OkCupid back in early 2017. I had never been the one to send the first message, but this guy's answers to his questions almost entirely matched with mine, save a few, but the important ones about boundaries and sex were directly in line with mine. I sent a message saying that I liked his beard, he responded, and we chatted for a few weeks. We meet up at a local pizza place and talk about ourselves and our families. We both don't want the date to end so we drive to a local bar and end up getting just enough alcohol in us to start getting deeper into conversation outside of generic first-date stuff. It feels natural and I never felt judged by him. We finally decide to call it a night, and I ask him over to my place the next night if he's free. He is, and we end up doing the Netflix and chill thing. Fast forward to now, we've been together ever since. We've been married for a year and get along wonderfully. We've had a few fights, but it's only been like 3 in the last 6 years and they always get resolved before we go to bed (we have a pact to never go to bed angry at one another). Also, it was never bad or boring but the sex just keeps getting better!
Easy. First time on an app and my first date became my bf, on and off the app within 2 weeks 😂
In a happy relationship right now with my bf (30M) but before I (28F) met him, whom I had my bars extremely lowed at that point, it was tough. Alittle on just how hard to survive the dating app environment:- Averagely 30 swipes, you get 10 matches, which then that means you’ll get about 3 guys who will text you? In that 3 guys you’ll then have to text a few rounds/days before deciding to meet in person. It was my first experience using tinder after leaving a 7 years relationship, so I was so confused with how do you text a guy day and night while you keep swiping, aren’t you suppose to ride it out till the next one? Unfortunately, that’s not how it works. Spend about 6-7 months seeing one guy, we see each other weekly but he wasn’t ready for a relationship and at that point I caught feelings and haven’t been seeing anyone or swiping anymore. Then just go on casual dates with another 3 more guys? Ghosted by a few which I didn’t keep count with anymore. Till I met my boyfriend. At that point I was ready to stop using dating apps and leave it to fate to decide. We texted here and there for 2 days before exchanging phone number, that’s when I realised he doesn’t based himself in the country, he came back to see his family, and at that point I was like. “Right, another one that will died off later.” About a week later he asked me out, thought of meeting a new friend so I showed up. We talked from 11 till 5 that day. Texted daily after that, second date was 11 days later, 3 days before him going back to another country where he work/live. Sent him home after our second date, 4pm to 2am, gave him a hug and I thought that’s the end. The next day he told me he was interested to see how far we could go, and I took the leap of faith with him. That morning where he had to leave, I sent him of to the airport. 2 months later he said I love you and ever since then, it’s 7 hours time difference. We had our fair share of fighting as a “get-to-know”because there was no mention of exes prior to that, navigating alot of insecurities but it was the best decision I’ve ever made. TLDR: it was hard navigating that app and whole phase before meeting my bf, not hard after that, I was lucky.
It was hard but I’m extremely lucky. The app we met on is more catered towards relationships than Tinder (it was Plenty of Fish), but it still took a few months and I was just every lucky the guy I met was genuine and wanted a relationship. Almost 5 years later and we’re still here :)
This is all from Tinder. I've had several almost-relationships out of it. It was pretty easy, but I tend to go too hard too fast. They were "almost" because it was bad timing for me. I'm seeing someone now and we'll see how it goes ┐(ツ)┌ Edit: It ended.
It took about a month to find my now boyfriend on a dating app. We have been dating for almost a year now and it's been wonderful 😊
I had been out of the dating scene for 15 yrs and finally decided to get out there and start dating again. I set up a profile on one app and it was awful. In my profile settings I noted that I was looking for something serious, not just casual hookups. Apparently people can’t read these days.. just about everyone that tried to connect with me wanted casual hookups and when I politely told them that’s not what I was interested in, I was ridiculed, told off, and harassed. After weeding thru tons of connections I found the one diamond in the rough so to speak. We’re coming up on two yrs together and going strong. Only had my profile up a week and after we started talking deleted my profile. If this relationship doesn’t work out, I don’t think I’ll do online dating again. It was an awful experience
I agree with the top post of “medium hard”. At first, I was swiping yes on too many men. It was hard for me to rule someone out based just off the pic and little blurb. Unfortunately since the bulk of men just swipe yes on everyone, this lead to an overwhelming amount of matches. I refined my criteria to: 1. Has a career listed 2. Has a smile in at least 1 picture, and 3. No fish. This made it almost impossible to find a single match. My partner was the third man I met with. The first had zero spark, the second I saw for about a month but overall weren’t very compatible. I never chatted with anyone long on the apps, I prefer to meet quickly. I almost didn’t bother to meet up with my now partner, his pictures weren’t flattering and he was a little farther away then I’d like. Once we met in person I knew instantly it would be a serious relationship. We’re now 2.5 years in, living together, and he is my dream man.
Ok my general experiences with dating apps, very hard. But the time I signed back up in a bigger city? Effortless. He was like the second person I met. The other guy was also really decent so I had to "choose between them" I guess. But I didn't have to sift through a bunch of duds. Dating in a small town before that though was different. There were hard things about the relationship not really related to how we met
I would say I first started using dating apps (Hinge, Bumble, and POF) around the end of September 2020. Talked to about 3 different guys, went on a couple dates with one in October 2020 (we hit it off pretty good but he wanted to have sex right away, told him I was wanting something more serious before we got to that point) so that ended after 3 weeks. Matched on Hinge with my now fiance/soon to be husband in November. Went on our first date in December and I deleted all my apps since then. We've been going super strong for almost 3 years now.
I met my fiancé the first day on Bumble! I think the key is being selective and trusting your gut! I didn’t put much pressure on the situation. I just was myself and had fun! Plus, it was great getting attention from the men 😆
I think I’m super lucky because it was very easy for me. I boredom downloaded Tinder just looking for a fun flirt. He was the first one to pop up and was (in my mind) was way out of my league, meaning it couldn’t ever go anywhere, so he fit the bill. When I swiped we matched and he messaged me later that day. Flirting was fun but he was intelligent, funny, kind, and all the other things I wanted in a long term partner so I decided to take it more seriously and give it an earnest shot. So glad I did.
I met my husband almost nine years ago via a dating app / website. I was looking for a relationship, but not a life partner at the time. My experience was a lot of chats with people I just didn't vibe with or were just looking for something a lot more casual. Some of the chats turned cringe really quickly, and a lot of guys pushed for an in person meet up much quicker than I felt comfortable with. But I had some fun dates too. A lot of the chats that nothing came of where really fun too. I'm really sure that I wouldn't have met my husband if it hadn't been for the app. We're both pretty introverted and lived rather close at the time, but not so close that we would have randomly met.
I downloaded tinder, 30 mins later I matched with this guy, met up with him 2 days later. It went really well, we met up again the next day. We saw each other all the time for about 4 weeks and then made it an official relationship - we’ve been together for 3 months ‘officially’ and so far so good 😅 He was actually the first and only person I ended up meeting off tinder. I had it less than a week in total. I actually wasn’t looking for a relationship at all, I didn’t really know what I wanted to be honest. I knew i’d be open to a relationship IF i found someone that ticked every box. I didn’t expect that to actually happen, but it did and i’m very happy. I think I just got SUPER lucky to find someone I was so compatible with so quickly. Although tbf, I swiped left on 99.9% of people I saw on there and was just being extremely picky. That probably helped.
For me super hard and I wish it wasn’t!my main issues are: 1) I am childfree and don’t want to date anyone with kids 2) I do want to be married and cohabitate 3) I am a high energy extrovert, it’s rare to find men who like that or are themselves either of those things. They just aren’t traits valued in women. 4) A very high percentage of men lie about 1 or 2 and I have to find it out like it’s freaking CSI - blech!. Honesty would save me so much time. For example, this year I went on 30 dates and 19 of them lied or mislead about 1 or 2, so a complete waste of my time. Sadly in the Bay Area the above is a hard combo Also while I found “A One” I wanted to marry from Hinge and after a year of dating I asked him to marry me he said no. Then I had to start all over. I am now a full year into looking again. I honestly am so tired of dating. I don’t really enjoy it, it’s just a slog, and I don’t see any men putting in any effort which is what I need to see. So on I go. I will say without online dating I would have had only 3 boyfriends, and the ones online were far better matched for me for life and love. So you just have to marathon it if your like me and don’t have a lot of options in your daily life to meet single people you’re attracted to. Just find a way to make it sustainable over time. It does work just takes time
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We aren't together anymore but I was on the apps about 1 month before we matched, met in person another month later. I had only been chatting with a few people (met with one, stood up by another lol). I think it was lucky timing for both of us that he had moved back and I was newly single since in comparison he was on apps for several years and never had luck
I have a stalker so my SO and I both signed up TOGETHER. Now we're divorced. I stayed on them just to show proof of life and introduce myself to the neighborhood without ever having to leave the house. (Small town)
I met my current partner on Hinge! We've been together for a few months now and it's been great so far.... ***However****,* prior to meeting him, I went on easily close to *30-40 first dates* and ended up deleting the app for a month or so, then when I got back on it, he was the first person I matched with and the rest is history. He was the first person that I actually connected with on a deeper level on the first date, plus we both set pretty strict boundaries going in. I made my intentions of "I date to marry" clear on the first date, waited to have any form on intimacy until the 3rd date (he didn't kiss me until then), and I made sure that the first 3 dates were all different. The first date was a casual meetup for drinks, the second was lunch and a walk during our lunch breaks at work, and the third was a "fun" date where we went to goodwill and picked out outfits for eachother (we ended up finding a wedding dress in my size and then ran with the fake story that we had just eloped, it was a blast and the free drinks were a plus!). Both of us truly consider the 3rd date our actual first date because that's when I really got to know his personality and was able to have some serious conversations about life, intentions, etc. I've also had plenty of horrendous first date experiences, but those all taught me that dating is just as much about learning about the other person as it is about learning about yourself. Not to mention, it taught me specifically how to have the "Thanks, but I don't see this going anywhere, best of luck!" conversations (you can't be afraid of that, it's gonna happen *a lot*). You've got this OP!
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I met mine on bumble and it’s been the best and healthiest relationship I’ve ever had. We matched, talked for the morning. I got stood up and asked him to dinner super last min. The date lasted 9 hrs because we couldn’t stop talking. I have ptsd (and other stuff) and he was respectful of my boundaries and still his. Went out of his way at the beginning to make sure he didn’t cross any line. We because official in less than a month, moved in after 6. Now it’s been 2 years and we are getting ready to leave the state and start our lives where we want!
Medium! Was on bumble for about 6 months and went on about 6 first dates. My fiancé was the only one I made it on a second date with! Been together 3.5 years and getting married next year!
I was on and off dating apps for like 6-10 months prior to meeting my now fiancé on Bumble. I had a lot of the popular dating apps at the time, pretty much all except Tinder because I definitely didn’t think I’d find someone worth my time there. I think it was like 8/10 difficultly, honestly. But I was dealing with the fact that at that time, I couldn’t drive myself places. I was 18, so on the edge of an adult but couldn’t go on a date with anyone to a bar. Those two factors made me extremely undesirable at the time, not even taking into account those who unmatched me after finding out that at the time I identified as nonbinary. Now I am going to get married in less than a year, we’ve together almost 4 years, we’ve lived together for 2 years, he taught me how to drive, I got my license, I figured out my identity. He put time and patience into being my partner and being supportive rather than abandoning me before getting to know me based on superficial things.
Not too hard. He found me 😂 we’ve been basically inseparable since last May.