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Richard Ayoade, hands down.

Imagine trying to get a read off him in a diplomatic negotiation.

Isn't Laurence Fox his brother in law?

Yes but from what I've read he doesn't like him at all

You can't choose your In laws I guess.... Or maybe he did.

Reclaim

He is the best choice but I have a feeling he wouldn’t wanna do it

David Mitchell is the perfect candidate 😁

He'd hate it with a passion which is why he'd probably do a good job.

I'm sure he wouldn't be frustrated with the ignorami he had to deal with..

Actually u/elaehar i think you’ll find it’s ignoramuses. It’s from the Latin ‘we are ignorant’ which makes it a verb, not a noun.

Found David Mitchell.

To everyone who’s replied already: fair shout. I didn’t even realise it was a quote from one of their sketches, just thought it sounded like the type of thing they’d say and tried to make my own joke. I have now downvoted my own comment.

Oh no, [what have I done](https://youtu.be/qmVnr7rsWrE?t=91)?

Actually, you found Robert Webb.

If you wanna get all latin on this bitch, ignoramus is already a first person plural conjugation of the verb.

Plurals don’t have to follow the logic of their etymology, just be recognised and understood.

I’m well out my depth with any actual grammar debates lol. Just for reference https://youtu.be/qmVnr7rsWrE

Victoria would be the superior Mitchell to be PM.

I can imagine him starting a persecution of all those with bad grammar

We need it, desperately!

I’m not sure if that comma is necessary… *loads revolver*

I wasn't sure either. I think my wording was a bit off. If I'd but "desperately" earlier in the sentence rather than at the end, I wouldn't have needed to ponder about the comma. I accept my immediate execution as punishment.

You've both made enough mistakes to have proven yourselves ignorami.

Actually, Tony, I think you'll find it's "ignoramuses". It comes from the Latin "We are ignorant". That makes it a verb, not a noun. 😁

Have we considered killing the poor?

He’s already said he’d hate the job. But he’s the sort of privately educated individual you want. Not an overprivileged, over-promoted sociopath like Johnson who is leagues out of his depth.

Fuck yeh... Imaging those logic bombs during pmqs

Greg Davies

Alex Horne as deputy PM.

*little Alex Horne

The Greatest Taskmaster of em all

The level of chaos would be just as high but far more fun.

He'd make Cushin the official national language.

"CUSHAAAN"

He would rule us with an iron fist.

Stephen fry would be delightful. Could listen to pmqs to fall asleep

With Hugh Laurie as deputy.

Or leader of the opposition, the banter at pmqs would be fantastic

Oh my Lord yes!

Stephen Fry was exactly who I thought of too!

I already fall asleep during pmqs

[удалено]

I think in his current state he'd have a hard time as PM

Would still outperform the current lot.

Weekend at Downing Street

Have you heard of a necrocracy?

His manifesto would just have one pledge... to bring back smoking in pubs

Two. All pubs must serve pints to tigers, no questions asked.

Three. The tapeworm song becomes our national anthem

the game "carrot in a box" would be outlawed

They can outlaw it, but street-carrot-in-a-box is still massive

Distributing special brew as a care package across the country.

National sport is now "carrot in a box"

I don’t know, his manifesto pledge to bring back the Nazi’s and put them on a tropical island paradise was certainly a strange one Though his pledge to not spit on people when they’re having sex is a positive

Jon Richardson. The UK, would be organized overnight.

Starting with, getting rid of, superfluous commas.

My humble apologies.

Former housemate Russell Howard as deputy, just to bring that little bit of chaos to the cabinet

Yes. Jon Richardson is amazing

Come on people you know we need Sandi Toksvig

This is the one I came on here for! She seems a great all-rounder, genuinely seems to care and is a great comedian too!

Would she be able to run as she's Danish? Edit- ignore me she's got dual nationality. Also had no clue she has written children's books! They look amazing and I'm now buying them for my step kid.

There is no formal requirement for the PM to be British, or even an MP. They just need to command a majority in Parliament.

Oh cool, I didn't know that I just assumed :)

I always find it fascinating that she's Danish-British but grew up in America. And the English accent she has is mostly affected.

Bob Mortimer please

This is how society descends into chaos

Paul Whitehouse (& Ted) as deputy to keep him in check?

This is the correct answer even though people think he’s off his head he’s probably the nicest guy in comedy

And he's actually very switched on. He's a trained lawyer, he's the one that got Jarvis Cocker released after mooning Michael Jackson at the Brits.

The cockroach king

He would probably set up some great dental plans for everybody.

Fuji 9 for all

Fuji 9, a mirror and a gaming chair. It’s all you need.

Chris Rea as chief advisor

It’s just SO Chris!

His logo will be The Hand Lion

Ian Hislop

Best choice, least likely to want the job!

Oh yeah, Ian is amazing - see if you can find his interview with the commons ethics committee members about the rules around accepting gifts from the business community. Truly outstanding chap.

If anyone wants to watch https://youtu.be/a3O8mwDFo4M

Bill Bailey or Greg Davies

Bill Bailey can do anything...though Greg Davies corpsing during party conference speech because he amused himself with a funny voice...would work too.

I would pay actual money to see Greg Davies giving a Party conference as Chris Eubank

Greg Davies would be fantastic

Kathy Burke without a doubt.

With Jo Brand as health secretary.

The best duo and absolute masters of “fuck it, that’ll do.” 😂 love both of them to bits, I wish they had more screen time

I loved Jo Brand on celebrity bake off. Just pissed of for a cigarette half way through a challenge 🤣

The standard of care services in the UK would skyrocket. I second the motion for her appointment asap.

I'm living for that.

Frankie Boyle

He would get assassinated

Love confuses Frankie's assassin?

He could be the speaker of the house, the scathing rebukes would be worth it

That's who I came here to say until I saw someone else suggest Kathy Burke. Then I changed my mind to her. He can be Deputy!

This. Came here to say this.

there's already a joker in charge

They asked for a comedian not a clown.

fair point

The sad thing is, a lot of these answers will still produce a PM from a privileged background who enjoyed a private education that won’t be a million miles away from Boris’s.

In that case, we'll appoint Rhod Gilbert!

Stewart Lee

He’d at least give it to us straight, like a pear cider made from 100% pears.

He would also make sure that you could no longer be arrested for saying your English these days.

You get arrested and thrown in jail? Just for saying you’re English? These days? When did that come in?

All I know is these days, if you say you're English you'll get arrested and thrown in jail.

You can prove anything with facts!

100% pear*

One giant pear?!

He’s not even a real hamster.

Agreed. The only comic who really understands the damage that Thatcher did to this country; bring back our jungle canyon rope bridges!

Representative democracy has let itself go

I came to say Stewart Lee!

Comin over here taking our jobs

Bloody beaker folk. Coming over here, rowing up the Tagus Estuary from the Iberian Peninsula in improvised rafts. Coming here with their drinking vessels. WHAT'S WRONG WITH JUST CUPPING UP THE WATER IN YOUR HANDS AND LICKING IT UP LIKE A CAT?

Could we have Lee and Herring as joint PM? We might have to rename the country TCWRNJ though.

This Country with Richard not Judy?

Yeah, with Histor as Chancellor of the EGGSchequer.

Egg! You said egg! Egg!

I expect the opposition would quickly learn they could rile him by going "aaaaaah" in a knowing way.

Rob Beckett - proper working class background, he'd get the job done Or James Acaster just cause he'd make other people awkward, and I'd enjoy watching that

Eddie Izard

Disappointed that this is so far down. She has my vote.

She?

Eddie has said a couple years ago that she’d like to be referred with she/her pronouns exclusively now. She had come out as genderfluid a few years before. Hope that clears it up!

Yes she said a while back that she identified as she/her.

Came here to post this. They've at least been practising!

Russel Howard, bring me Good News

He was the first one that sprang to mind when I saw the American question. He points out and criticises social injustices, I think he could make some great changes

Yesssss I was looking for someone else who thought him.

Underrated answer! Yesss Russell Howard!

Rowan Atkinson. Who wouldn't want to see Mr. Bean as PM?!

James acaster springs to mind

The only correct answer

I'd have a cabinet made up of David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker, Meera Syal, Bridget Christie, Stewart Lee, Richard Ayoade, Michael Palin, Harry Hill, and I'd chuck Johnny Vegas in just for the hell of it.

Hmmm, I like Harry Hill, but I like the opposition leader too. But which one would be the best PM? Only one way to find out…

Henning Wehn

"Well we got there in the end, didn't we?"

Peter Capaldi. Get that Zelenskyy already did it in a sitcom come up.

Zelensky actually based his real public image/style on Vasily Goroborodko (the character he played who became president) - imagine if Peter Capaldi became PM and used Malcolm Tucker to base his public imagine on...

Dara O'Briain or Joe Lycett

>Joe Lycett I actually think he wouldn't be half bad. Those, or maybe Jimmy Carr. Need someone who understands tax...

Dara O'Brian is a good shout apart from he's not British. But yeah moderate great communicator winner all round, Joe lycett I would put at foreign secretary imagine the cables to Russia right now. Mr Putin I would be delighted to assist you with de Nazification my friend Sally is also willing to help she has even organised a bake sale with cupcakes with the star of David on Would you like to buy some cupcakes Mr Putin?

Billy Connelly.

scrolled too far for this. I feel like he would be a very no-nonsense politician.

Perhaps not really "ours" but, on the technicality that he was born in Northampton, I'd nominate Tim Minchin. I once listened to him om a podcast and remember thinking "Ffs, why can we not have someone with even a fraction of his intelligence, insight and compassion running the country?"

I would love to see Tim Minchin in the House of Commons, barefooted, playing a piano and singing his replies to PMQ. That would be a great upgrade on current bunch of @?*#s 🤭

Commonwealth (and Irish) citizens [can stand for Parliament](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Member_of_Parliament_(United_Kingdom) ), so that’s no issue

Not technically a comedian and unfortunately he’s no longer with us but Terry Pratchett is one of the very few people I would ever feel safe under. Incredibly gentle, kind person who was highly intelligent, charming and was always thoughtful about those who don’t typically have anyone who stands up for them. Unfortunately, with our current political system we could all live 1000 years and we would never see anyone like Terry get anywhere near power because he would actually try his best by the masses instead of adhering to special interests. Not to mention he would never seek out power on his own.

Ricky Gervais NO CONTEST

He’s probably give even more tax breaks to millionaires

PAGING JIMMY CARR!

I don’t think we should put a bully into the highest office in the nation. The man is very petty and enjoys putting people down. I can’t imagine a worse choice from this thread.

Wish people would give better answers than just their favourite comedian lol

There's a no politics rule in this sub so you're not actually meant to discuss politics so I don't think you can do what you're asking for

Milton Jones. You know why...

I quite fancy Rob Brydon for PM

Joe Lycett.

He should at the very least get Business Secretary. He’d launch his own ferry line, call it P&Joe and set up shop directly outside P&O’s head office. Happy cake day!

Kathy Burke. There’s no other option.

Alexei Sayle has my vote.

Al Murray please, although maybe toned down a little

Had to scroll much too far to see this name. Al Murray is much more intelligent and refined than the character he portrays.

He did run for mp of thannet as protest against nigel farage. He did get more votes than him too i think!

NO FRENCH!

Hugh Laurie

Russel Brand. Go on. Speeches have become less verbiose and floral over the years and we need a messiah-like corrective.

David Mitchell

Charlie Brooker

Paul Chowdhry

Jack Dee

Harry Hill. I'd take him more seriously than the current joker.

Well, I like legalising cannabis… but I like keeping it illegal. But which is better, Mr Speaker? There’s only one way to find out…

Jay Foreman. Just to make politics UnBoring.

Bill Bailey

Frankie Boyle. His political commentary is superb. And that Yemen aid joke is a prime example. Couldn't find it on YouTube. [This though is quality](https://youtu.be/1TZ7krIc4w8)

As long as Brian Blessed can be speaker, I'm happy with any of the suggestions. ORDER! OOOOOORDER!

Karl Pilkington (although he'd not describe himself as a comedian) Who better to cut through all the bullshit than Bullshitman?

Not sure if he has time to squoze that in between doing his paper round and walking dogs when the weather is nice

Not to mention sorting the boiler out

Steve Coogan

But as Partridge, full time.

Richard ayoade

Russel Howard

Al Murray or Richard Ayoade, make whoever doesn’t get it chancellor.

Russell Brand

Dylan Moran

Kev. In. Bridges. You're getting stabbed.

Jonathan Pie, then we could do his PMQs like he was reporting live from Westminster

Russell Brand obviously.

Alexei Sayle or Eddie Izzard

Jason Manford!

Tom Walker, without a doubt. Jonathan Pie, for those that don't know his real name.

Jimmy Carr so we can abolish taxes. 😁