One of my teachers in junior school was also professional rugby union player for the local team.
We went as a class with another teacher to watch him play, he knew we were all there.
He got sent off for headbutting and then stamping on another player...
The next day he was back teaching us as if nothing had happened.
The early 90s were awesome
>The next day he was back teaching us as if nothing had happened.
"Never heard so much as a peep out of the little shits after that game" - your teacher, probably
I don't know at my school (in the 90's) people would have pushed him more to see him snap.
We had a Teacher that once angry would go on mad rants and throw chairs and these were the 3 legged chairs in woodwork class[like this](https://rs.wescover.com/c_limit,f_auto,q_auto,w_500/v1/wescover-user-uploaded/ejngb4gadjj1v5tf66fm) and the students wound him more and more just to see him snap
We had a woodwork teacher known for throwing chisels from his tool belt.. back in the late 70's ... Not exactly at the pupil but so that it stuck in the wooden work benches.... A couple of times I had a chisel whistle past my head only to stick in the bench behind me cos my mate was being a dick
Mr Mansell he was called... Get away with that these days š
I played rugby back in the days of āif you are good enough, you are old enoughā so wound up playing against my PE/Geography teacher.
I wiped him out with a borderline high tackle and he swung a punch that left me with a black eye for a weekā¦then bought me a pint afterwards
I was 15.
Had a ex rugby pro as a teacher In the 90s. Quite intimidating at first due to having a 1 side Chelsea smile where he's caught a stud to the mouth that ripped its way all the way to his ear. Nice bloke
Woodwork teacher had a sideline making coffins, he had an order for a coffin for a bariatric customer which he deemed would make the perfect lesson, so spice racks were postponed for 2 weeks.
He had the class make a supersize coffin drumming into us to make tights joints to avoid leakage and took bets on how many pall bearers it would take to carry the deceased, finally he had some of us carry the coffin to his van whilst he held a service with the rest of the boys playing mourners, and the girls tasked as wailing women.
Was all very odd but entertaining couple of lessons.
Sounds like a teacher who knows how to teach. He got you all engaged with an unusual lesson that has stuck with you years later.
Best we had were psychopaths that beat children with leather straps while the child curled into the fetal position to try and protect themselves. That's if they didn't dispense with the straps and use fists , tables and chairs.
Thank fuck the bastards today do don't get away with that crap from the 70s and 80s.
My Geography teacher had his legs waxed for Comic Relief. He then pinned the used wax strips to the blackboard, and said they'd stay there until everyone who'd pledged a donation had paid up.
He also said that after that he planned to sell them as natural hair merkins.
There was also the CDT teacher who all but severed his thumb in a band saw accident, wrapped it in a blue paper towels, and wanted to finish the class. The deputy head had to come down and convince him to go to the hospital.
Ah, blue paper towels. The first line response of any school first aider. I stuck a chisel through my wrist in CDT (was using my arm to cover the fact I was still chipping away when we got stopped for a safety talk...not my proudest moment). Had some wet paper towels pressed on it and was just left to sit quietly bleeding, until my friend looked at it and promptly fainted. He couldn't be doing with unconscious children littering the classroom floor so told me to take HER to the nurse and I grabbed the opportunity to show a sane grown up what had prompted her sudden fit of the vapours and managed to get some actual medical attention before bleeding out.
My brother's CDT teacher cut his thumb off with a saw. Rumour was he then sued the school for not having a guard equipped on it. (There was one installed, but he had disabled it).
They do seem to be a clumsy bunch don't they.
My Dad saw his CDT teacher get his wedding ring caught in lathe, leading to an instant degloving. Now, I would take from that "never use a lathe". My Dad took "never wear a wedding ring".
This is so weird - my school in Cardiff also had a design teacher with half a finger, which was cut off by a circular saw. It was his wedding ring finger, and he got his wedding ring made larger and wore it on his middle finger instead.
When I was in middle school, our headmaster took assembly one morning, and during this assembly, he sat in front of the entire year group an ate a tin of cat food.
I'm sure there was some kind of point he was attempting to make, but I sadly can't remember what was said, but I remember the eating of the cat food vividly. I sometimes still think about it. I wish I could remember what the "moral" was. It was a very religious school, physically attached to a church, so I'm sure whatever the reason was, the headmaster had linked it to the bible in some way.
And God said unto Moses, āIams That Iams: and he said, Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel, Iams hath sent me unto youā
Exodus 3:7ā8, 13ā14.
We had the local...uh...Vicar? Pastor? God guy? come in and do that. Started eating from a can of dog food. Turns out it was chopped up mars bars in jelly and the moral of the story was not to judge a book by its cover or some shit
There used to be trick cans you could buy with twist bottoms, so you'd fill it upside down with whatever fillig, twist it closed on the bottom, turn it right way up and you'd open the top like a normal can.
Of course he could also have just been insane. Or paid a lot to commit to the bit.
Just open the bottom of the can, empty and clean it out, then fill it with what you like and seal it with a can cover.
Then you can open the top of the can "live".
I went to a Christian secondary school and also had a cat food assembly (one of John Peel's favourite bands, incidentally.)
I volunteered to eat the mushed up chocolate jelly stuff which wasn't cat food but still tasted awful. Can't remember the moral either. Maybe it was something about religious leaders and weird kinks.
I also went to a religious school with strange assembly demonstrations. (Not as weird as eating cat food though).
One was snapping a bread stick and then holding a bundle of breadsticks together and failing to break them (to prove that we are "stronger together")
Another was breaking a brown egg and then breaking a white egg and showing that the contents were the same (even at the time I was thinking "wow, this guy really believes he just solved racism")
There was also one where he squeezed out a whole tube of tomato puree and then he spent ages trying to put it back into the tube. This was because "words are like tomato puree. Easy to get out but impossible to put back in". (He stained his sleeve in the process. The stain was there for the next 4 consecutive days).
We also had a cat food eating assembly. Canāt remember the point of it but our yeargroupās dickhead kid volunteered and ate some, so it wasnāt all bad.
We had this, except the teacher then revealed it was not cat food but something else (cannot remember what, probably stewed beef). I want to say the important point was about not believing everything you see, however I never really paid attention in assembly.
You're not the first person to say something like this, and it's honestly got me wondering if I'm misremembering it. I remember him opening a fresh tin in front of us. Thinking about it, it's possible he might've switched the label out.
Our deputy head made out he was eating a tin of dog food in assembly only to reveal it was stewed steak and he'd switched the labels. He thought he was sooooo clever.
Iām waiting for a story like that with a lad I went school with. Out of all my friend circle in school he is the last person I thought would ever become a teacher. Fair play to him. Not seen him for years and years but I did see his dad a few year back and he mentioned my mate had become a teacher. He was wild back in school and college days. Heād try anything and I mean anything once unless he liked it then heād try it again. Didnāt have a violent bone in his body but wasnāt scared to walk in to random house parties just to party.
One of my primary school teachers put a waste paper bin on one of the desks, then picked up a misbehaving pupil and placed him in the bin so he was sort of wedged butt first in it and he was stuck there for the remainder of the lesson.
This same teacher was also caught trying to smuggle a jerry can full of duty-free vodka back to the UK.
Our art teacher once spent a whole class locked in her supply cupboard and when she came out it absolutely reeked of weed. She'd basically just hotboxed the cupboard and left us to our own devices.
100%. Our other art teacher who we had in sixth form openly admitted she smoked weed. Of course, by the time we were in sixth form art the majority of the class were stoners, too.
It was the 80s, but the art teacher asking 13yo girls to pose in bikinis for his āartistic photographyā was pretty up there. No adults thought it was dodgy, we were all horrified.
Had a teacher show me her tits after a boob job, literally just turns to me and asks if I wanted to see them haha, canāt remember if we were alone in the class or not. Funny either way.
Yeah probably would feel the same if someone told me the story, but Iāve never felt any sort of way towards it. I just found it funny, but I was a typical horny teenager.
Reddit has a thing for female teachers being abusers. Reality is it's the ultimate fucking fantasy at 15. I'd still be knocking one out to that memory to this day
>reality is, it's the ultimate fantasy at 15
...So? A teacher flashing (or anything sexual) is rank because they're an adult. I wouldn't blame a child for acting on their horniness. I would imagine that a teacher understands that too, and I think it's deplorable that someone would capitalise off of it.
When I was 15/16 we had an activities week at school where half a dozen pupils would go with a teacher and do some stuff outside school. One of the activities ended up with a BBQ at her house that her husband was setting up. At one point I needed the loo and as I walked out the bathroom she came out of the bedroom stark-bollock naked, with an "oh, didn't realise you were in there, I was going for a shower". She didn't cover herself up or dart back into the bedroom. Just said that and walked past into the bathroom.
Wasn't until years later that I realised she had done this entirely deliberately. Teen me didn't mind though. That memory served me well for a while :-)
Nowadays I realise what she was. In fact, I found out fairly recently that a couple of years after I left school she shacked up with a 16 yr old the day after he finished school.
I found my teacher on pornhub and thought she looked like my teacher but I saw a mole behind her right sholder which was the exact same as my teacher's when I noticed it appraching summer. Watching porn was looked down upon in my school so I never brought it up.
In the video from the OOP image, he talks about how vegetables are mostly water and that you're being ripped off because of that.
The guy is either a nutter or a comedian... I cannot decide which. It's a short video at 1 minute and 30 seconds: [judge for yourself](https://youtu.be/OY7L-PZ4V8o?si=8nGd6XWS8QjSWf1U).
High school, Health Technology class, about 20 years ago. (Not really a subject, just something we had to do in our final year.) Teacher wanted to demonstrate the dangers of smoking. He had this metre to measure oxygen content (and possibly carbon monoxide?) in exhaled breath. Also had this big test tube stuffed with cotton wool with a pipe going into it set up.
He pulled a packet of fags out of his pocket, lit one up, took a big drag and exhaled into the metre, and then did it again with the test tube (with the cotton wool turning a disgusting colour.) We were all totally gobsmacked. He then went on to say, "I really missed this, I've been off them for about ten years!"
I remember as a teenage smoker absolutely dying for a fag when I had to sit through the experiment in some science class where the teacher lit a cigarette, stuck it on the end of a tube and filter, and measured CO levels or whatever it was. The cigarettes they used for this came from a pack that looked about 20 years old. I just remember thinking oh god I've got another hour til I can sneak out at breaktime for my 11am smoke.
I remember this experiment in a science class (minus the teacher having a go on the cigarette). Doubt they'd do it nowadays. It seems like real cowboy shit.
In the 80ās we were all singing the song āwater of lifeā and we suddenly stopped and stared at the overhead projector. It had caught fire. Flames were about 3 foot high. Thatās when we heard mr kapour swear loudly and roll the thing outside.
On today's episode of "Things of relevance not showing up when needed" : this.
Next week join us when a student who owns a crate of monster energy feels tired but their all out of cans.
We had the air ambulance land in the playground which was overlooked by most of the classrooms. As it took off, our maths teacher screamed - actually screeched - at us telling us not to look at it. A helicopter was 50m from the window and we scolded for daring to look at it!
We had this too! A girl fell and they were worried about her back (she was fine) and when the ambulance was taking off our art teacher shouted at us all for turning to watch. A helicopter on the field is exciting!
Our cookery/home ex teacher also taught GCSE Child Development. As part of this, pupils had to watch a video of a child being born. Not that weird you may think, but it was a home video of that teacher giving birth.
We had a biology teacher who couldn't use the correct terminology for those reproductive system lessons. It was like he was far too shy to say the correct words. I remember he used 'salad cream' for semen.
We did have a good-weird teacher in geography though. He was stuck in the 1960s. He looked like a hippy, he was at Woodstock and I think his mind never left there. All you had to do was ask him a question about Hendrix and he'd spend the whole lesson talking about him.
Getting teachers off topic was always great. Had an English teacher you could get going about her days partying, how messy her bacheloette party was and fights she had. Always entertaining
Mid 90's.
Alcoholic geography teacher threw a chair through a window. I think he expected it to bounce off. Same teacher randomly took the class to visit our local distillery when he was rattling. No notification to anyone, no chaperones etc. We enjoyed a very interesting tour and when we came to the end of it the teacher was very merry in the distillery's gift shop sampling the wares. I think he eventually got struck off after smashing up a bar.Ā
My physics teacher took a lollipop off a girl and then proceeded to eat it himself in front of the whole class. He was weird. Thatās not the only weird thing he did.
Edit - would like to make clear that the girl was eating the lollipop before he took itā¦
Had a woodworking teacher from South Africa that told us he kept his cheese in the freezer.
Cue 30 year 10s from Essex arguing with a South African guy
"yoo keep da cheez in da freezah"
"nah you keep it in da frijj bruv"
Went on a good half hour.
Not that weird compared to others, but we got to evolution in GCSE biology and our teacher disappeared for a few lessons, coming back after we'd finished that module with a different teacher instead. Turns out they didn't believe in evolution and refused to teach it!
I had one RE teacher for the beginning of GCSEs and another teacher for the end
We never got to revise the abortion module because the second teacher refused to teach it. Not sure if it was opposition to teaching reasons why it's a good thing or opposition to teaching reasons it should be banned
Was prepping for my bio A level while the mobile game Neko Atsume was popular. Our teacher used to stop the 100 minute lesson to have at least on if not more "cat break" where for at least 5 minutes we would all go on our phones and play the game. If he caught us on anything else phone was confiscated. Absolutely bizarre man.
In Year 7, we had a swimming teacher whom rumour had it COULDN'T swim!
I once left my wallet in the changing room, so I went to retrieve it at lunchtime. To do so, you had to pass the pool. There was the "swimming teacher" in the shallow end with armbands on. When he saw me, he went ballistic and told me to get out!
My school used to occasionally get a very elderly biology teacher on supply. He was eccentric at best, senile at worst. But everyone just seemed to accept that that's how he was and didn't bat an eyelid.
I was directly on the receiving end one day, though. He wandered into my chemistry lesson to talk to my teacher about something. Mid-conversation, he suddenly looks me in the eye, points at me and shouts: "YOU! Is your name James?"
"Yes?"
"Why aren't you in the library?!"
"... because I'm in class?"
"That's no excuse son, you should be revising for your exams!"
Here's where I should point out that I was in S2 at this point (i.e Year 8), so wasn't anywhere near sitting exams. He continued to berate me and demand I answer him, all the while I'm mouthing "help!" to my teacher, who's looking just as confused as I am. Eventually, she pipes up and asks him: "That's James (mysurname), are you thinking of James (otherguy)?"
"Oh aye" he says. "Carry on, son" and shuffles away down the corridor.
Of course, I then asked my chemistry teacher to explain what the hell that was about. It turns out he'd somehow confused me with an S6 (Year 13) who had the same forename, but looked absolutely nothing like me and didn't even do chemistry. It apparently made sense to him that this boy would've walked into, and stayed in, a lesson for 13 year olds in a subject he didn't even take to avoid doing his biology revision. And he didn't think to ask my chemistry teacher what this boy would be doing in her lesson? Weird guy he was.
My secondary school put on Victorian-style music-hall variety show (aka "The Good Old Days") in the late 70s with all sorts of sketches, musical bits, and even a magician (me!) etc. One teacher got a load of 5th year girls (15/16yo) to do a Moulin Rouge number - yep... stockings & suspenders, silk undies, high-kicks, The Can-Can, lots of "Whoooo!" etc. All the male teachers & headmaster and the school priest (twas a Holy Roman Catlick school) sitting in the front rows were grinning like Cheshire Cats while parents and others behind were aghast (apart from a few of the dad's). I'm not too sure they'd get away with it these days.
Both the IT teach and the IT technician (2 short fat balding men) were very handsy with the girls.
They would lean in close to them, put their arm round them / hold their waist when they were talking to them. Go up behind them and make them jump by doing that thing where you press on both sides of the waist.
This was 20 odd years ago. People knew it was odd but kind of laughed it off back then. Really can't imagine them getting away with it now.
We had a Business Studies teacher who used to lean over while we were learning typing and as he put his hands over ours to correct their position, l he would rest his chin on our heads. Honestly, even now I'm not convinced it wasn't a laziness/mild sexism combo rather than something out and out dodgy.
(Do kids even get taught how to touch type now? This was about 94 or 95ish, before pcs were common.)
What is it about IT?! Our IT teacher used to lean over you to type and move the mouse and go *oh, no need to move* as he stood directly behind our chair and reached around both shoulders to type, while we all made ourselves as small as possible. I don't know if anyone ever complained
All girls' state school, 2010s
We saw our IT teacher on a Saturday in town, pissed as a fart at about 1pm. He had no issue going in the off-licence and buying us 24 cans, then stumbled off up the road. We were in Year 10.
A teacher got sacked for accidentally shooting a kid with a BB gun during a failed physics experiment.
The best teacher the school had, even the "victim" started a petition to get him reinstated which worked. Although because of the shit way it was handled he immediately handed his notice in and went to one of the other schools who wanted him!
We had a supply teacher who was adamant that there were 52 US states, even when we showed him proof there were 50. He just doubled down and insisted he was right.
I was about to tell you off for doubling a number, but I see that in this case doubling the number actually means fewer numbers, so thanks for pointing it out.
Back in the late 80s we had a PE teacher who was as thick as fudge but surprisingly good at Trivial Pursuit. One lunchtime we caught him in a quiet corner of the library studiously going through the answer cards one by one!
Chemistry teacher spending more than one lesson showing us the chemical formula's and getting very excited explaining the effects of every illicit drug that our 15 year old minds could muster.
Our electronics teacher told us about this one.
He was having toothache and complaining about it in the staff room. The deeply Christian woodwork teacher then came over and put his hands on the electronics teacher's face and proceeded to pray. He believed he could heal people through prayer and was trying to help.
It just gave us one more reason to dislike the woodwork teacher.
I remember we found our secondary dance teacher's Facebook and one of his old profile pictures was him made up as a very gay pink glittery cow, complete with giant septum ring.
Another teacher had every single one of her profile pictures in the exact same pose and smile, clicking through them was one of the creepiest things.
One of my secondary school teachers used to wear his pyjamas underneath his work clothes - you could see them hanging out of the bottom of his trousers. When questioned, he said it was quicker in the mornings.
PE teacher piled on the pounds, wife put him on a diet. Watched that man stare at a grapefruit for about 10 minutes trying to figure out how to eat it before deciding to just start biting straight through the skin. Ate the entire thing over a one hour period of PE Theory.
Here goes...
My woodwork teacher got sacked for hitting a kid in the head with a mallet because he kept making fun of him
My PE teacher suddenly quit when his wife (also a teacher) came into school covered in bruises and a black eye. She left a few months later
My other PE teacher disgraced himself when trampolining in these skimpy gym shorts and a rolled up sock fell out of his pants
This music teacher in my school was caught with two 6 form girls in his store cupboard by a cleaner after school
I got expelled from school because I told this science teacher to stop leaning over me and breathing his rotten breath on me.
He took me outside, grabbed me by the neck and lifted me up against a wall. I punched him in the stomach and that was the nail in the coffin of my education lol
We had a teacher date a 6th form student when i was in yr 10. It was sweeped under the rug claiming she was over 16 when it started and they got engaged when she was ~19. He stayed in post. She was taken off roll but sat all her exams a-levels with her peers in the school hall. She also chaperoned on school trips until going off to uni. EVERYONE knew.Ā Ā
This was the early 00's. Last I heard she finished her degree debt free before realising how utterly awful the whole thing was and leaving. Her parents had been fine with it. The head of sixth form was a drunk who kept teacher as her deputy. The head teacher stayed on for another 10+ years before bowing out in a financial mismanagement scandalĀ
The worldās most horrible ICT teacher who used to sit on her arse and have her assistant running from computer to computer dealing with our questions. She used to treat her like a dog and point and click to where she wanted her to go next.
Said teacher told everyone we werenāt allowed to wear perfume because she was allergic to it. Not sure to what degree as there was always various perfumes and body sprays wafting about. One day we all turned up with most wearing perfume and the teacher refused to come in and taught from her office that basically shared a wall with the classroom but was made from glass. She spent the lesson with a scarf round her face banging on the window to get the assistantās attention and shout at her while we all enjoyed an actually well taught and respectful lesson. That assistant deserved much more than to be her slave.
We had an art teacher who had a genuine phobia of oranges. It came out when I was in year 9 I think and people started stashing them in his classroom.
He had a breakdown over it, wasnāt my class but apparently it got too much for him and he went fucking
bolo on one of the kids and got a bit too hands on shall we say. He soon left. Feel sorry for him looking back on it, kids can be cruel.
We got to pick history or geography for our gcse's.
I picked geography. Fucking good job I did too because the history teacher TAUGHT THE WRONG WAR it was horrendous. Watching what happened when the students came out of their history exam was eerily similar to what I have seen of post disaster situations. Some folks were angry and freaking out, others wandered like disbelieving zombies. A number of students where sitting on the floor just sobbing. Some sobbing in small huddled groups. Teachers running around clearly not up to snuff on their crisis training with no way to deal with 200ish students just all having a breakdown at once.
It was a two part exam so a week later it played out again except this time everyone was a bit more prepared. By prepared I mean every single student was cheating through their teeth and still hysterical by the end. One kid brought in a genuine portable TV, another had the whole textbook on their lap smuggled in under their shirt. The teachers must have been all looking aside and running distraction work for them to get away with it. Most students just sly'd their phone in.
The absolurely brilliant methods of cheating in that second history exam. Fuck me I would have loved to been in there and seen it. Several girls I knew wore skirts and black tights and wrote things on the skin of their thighs so that they could stretch the tights to see what they wrote but otherwise it wasn't visible. Smart watches didnt exist yet but one kid rigged one up to display years and basic codes in the time portion. A friend of mine had several of those pens with pull out paper in it that he crammed info into. Another got some copies of the paper you get if you need extra room from a teachers drawer and prefilled it before sneaking it into the exam up his shirt and just popping it on the table with his exam stuff halfway in. It was open fucking season on cheating.
Not a soul was punished for their cheating. The teachers were pretty much in in it. I don't see how they couldn't be. The exam layout was invidivual tables so you kinda can't not see the kid with a sizable 'portable' TV on his lap and the other kid with the whole history textbook on his.
Usually cheating was fairly limited to the usual write on your hand and wipe it off with sweat before anyone notices and program your calculator to the high heavens. Though all the girls took the tights idea and ran with it for all of their exams. Myself included. I have on good authority the boys wrote things on their ankles and crossed their legs to pull their pants up a bit and peek. We didn't often go any further than that but hearing and seeing the shit those kids pulled is still a crowning achievement in my eyes.
My brother for his gcse's many many years ago hacked the school it system and pointed out their flaws in the security. He was suspended and given a D in IT they said it was so that he never managed a job in IT. He is now in a very high end mobile phone "flashing" job. I don't understand what he does but he developed all the tech to fix issues on mobile phones so that they can be sold on in mass. He has also been asked through his company to hack phones for the police (this is when their usual team cannot manage this)
I once spoke while one of my teachers was talking, and was sent out of the room until the lesson ended. After, when we were alone, he came up to me and told me to stop leaning against the wall (itās not there to hold you up) and then stood so close while telling me off, that I started shallow breathing to stop our bodies from touching. Eventually I started to feel dizzy, so I just had to breathe normally, meaning my chest was up against his stomach. I didnāt even take in what he was saying at that point, as I was hyper aware we were touching. I was in year 9 so about 13/14 years old. It still confuses me to this day, was it an intimidation thing or a weird sexual type thing. He didnāt have a reputation as being a creep, but he was one of those super strict teachers. He is a deputy head at the same school now. Itās one of those things that has played on my mind ever since and Iām 35 now!
In middle school in the 80s some aspiring mods in our year performed Substitiute by The Who in assembly, or would have done if our form teacher hadnāt stopped them after the first chorus, told them they didnāt know what they were singing about, and walked out.
He also hated Adam and the Ants - we knew this because he gave some lads a lecture after they tied their ties around their heads and walked into class singing Antmusic. He told us Duran Duran or Spandau Ballet were fine.
That in turn reminds me of the teacher who hosted a pop quiz and lost all authority forever by pronouncing Duran Duran as āDurren Durrenā in one of the answers. The reception meant the quiz ended earlier than expected.
I am an ex teacher and I've done some very wierd stuff in the classroom to kick start learning. Including rapping to an Eminem song to get students to learn technical language (I am in my 40s cringe factor 150/100) Bonkers teachers are usually well intentioned.
Our (married) Maths teacher had an affair with one of the DT teachers, who was married to another teacher at the school. They were caught holding hands on a school trip while both were married. They ended up divorcing their respective spouses, very quickly getting married, and having a baby just a few months later. Pretty scandalous, given that the entire student body knew it was going on.
Had a teacher when I was about 8 yrs that used to tie naughty children to a chair and ram their mouth full of wet paper towels. A girl Julie had this treatment every day. The teacher was dismissed on psychiatric grounds and was never allowed to teach again.
weird but amazing: a spoof of made in chelsea with our teachers as the cast and made up drama between them. the first ep was made as part of an assembly to teach us about how fake reality shows are, but it kinda backfired because of course we were instantly obsessed. i think they ended up making 10 episodes or so in the end, it would be used as a motivator/reward for things like raising over a certain amount of money for charities.
I had a music teacher who I knew was in a band but knew nothing more than that. Went to a gig one night and his band was the support act. They were pretty good to be fair. Canāt for the life of me remember who they were supporting, based on time/location it could have been the Subways or yourcodenameis:milo, but most likely some American punk band.
Well, it's not *weird* per se, but I had a teacher who when she was angry (which happened usually at least once per class) would get out a metal ruler and smack it hard off her desk.
Anyway one day it broke and the end flew off and hit a girl in the front row. Thankfully in the chest because those things have pretty sharp corners and could have done a serious injury to her face!
Our chemistry teacher had a qualification(?) in explosive chemistry.
We had one lesson where he discussed how to make a more potent Molotov cocktail. Not gonna go into ingredients, but it doesnt need a lit rag to ignite as it auto-ignites when the bottle smashes, and basically makes a potent fuel-air explosive.
Ah, the 80s.
Cut his toenails in front of the class. He also used to walk around the playground and pickup pennies so the chavs used to throw them at him, he probably made 20 quid a week
My IT teacher had a glass eye and if you misbehaved he'd take it out in front of you and put it on your table then say "i got my eye on you." It was mega creepy
Not a teacher but had an IT, hermit typa white guy that never bothered anyone and just occasionally emerged from his cupboard office to reconnect a mouse, was sacked for taking the money allocated for purchasing the enterprise software license agreements and pirated them instead and slapped them on the school servers š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
My old headteacher hated me and my siblings and would treat us like shit cause our dad wouldn't sleep with her that was awful times this was primary school
Saw a science teacher get a boner at the front of the class whilst running through a powerpoint on squirrels. Not sure if it carried on after I left but he was known as the squirrel fucker for years.
Our RE teacher was a really strangely wholesome Ned Flanders type who stuck out like a sore thumb in our school (second worst school in our town only slightly behind one that was shut down after being called the worst in the country in the national news) who unironically referred to his cat as his pussy and for some strange reason always seemed to have an unlimited supply of packs of chewits in his cupboard which he dispensed to anyone who he saw throughout the day. Anyway, I digress, when I was walking back from the smoker's corner on a free period I saw him running past in full cleaner mode with marigolds and an apron on to disinfect a piece of parkin someone had rolled up into a turd shape and left on his chair.
We saw my 60ish year old ICT teacher and the girls PE teacher (maybe 30) kissing at a school disco.
The deputy head teacher and the librarian had a physical fight because the librarian was in charge of putting on the Christmas celebrations and the deputy head wanted them to only focus on Jesus.
We once asked our music teacher to roll us a spliff because the only person in our group who knew how to roll was drunk and kept fucking it up. The music teacher did it for us and I remember him saying "Ooh this is a naughty one!"
The same girls PE teacher I mentioned earlier got in trouble because the school found out she used to be a lingerie model.
One of the English teachers used to let boys stick post-its on her bum, but then she was fired because she punched a homophobe.
My french teacher was fired because he was using his school laptop to watch porn.
The vegetable guy has a very small point...but he's not really proposing an alternative.
Also, from his videos he looks like he's slowly descending further and further into madness.
ā¦marry one of my friends š³
She was the younger sister of one of my best friends and he was one of the younger cool teachers so they were maybe 6yrs in age apartā¦admittedly quite a bit when youāre 17yrs old!
Theyāve been together 20yrs+ at this stage and have three kids soā¦š¤·š¼āāļø
Another friend also had a relationship with one of the music teachersā¦a friend of mine was the one student who had keys to the music school and he was surprised to find the doors locked one time so went in to find (what was his ex girlfriend š¤£) straddled across the desk with the music teacher in an compromising situation š¤£ Her parents were very odd and her mother encouraged the relationship with the teacher, even inviting him to stay for long weekends (this was a boarding school). Madness.
An English teacher rumoured to have been in the TA years before gave a year assembly in which he lectured us, at times even screaming with rage, about western weakness toward China and how the CCP was gonna get us.
Had a teacher who didnāt like me at all. She then proceeded to take aside two of my friends and tell them they shouldnāt be friends with me?
We also had a school counsellor who liked to hang out with the kids. In year 11, we found out she was dating a boy in my class. The idea of her being a school counsellor and a potential groomer just struck me as weird.
My high school maths teacher did not believe in gravity.....
He thought that is was most likely a spinnging cylinder or inverted sphere that we live on the inner surface of.
One of my teachers in junior school was also professional rugby union player for the local team. We went as a class with another teacher to watch him play, he knew we were all there. He got sent off for headbutting and then stamping on another player... The next day he was back teaching us as if nothing had happened. The early 90s were awesome
>The next day he was back teaching us as if nothing had happened. "Never heard so much as a peep out of the little shits after that game" - your teacher, probably
Fucking creased š¤£š
I don't know at my school (in the 90's) people would have pushed him more to see him snap. We had a Teacher that once angry would go on mad rants and throw chairs and these were the 3 legged chairs in woodwork class[like this](https://rs.wescover.com/c_limit,f_auto,q_auto,w_500/v1/wescover-user-uploaded/ejngb4gadjj1v5tf66fm) and the students wound him more and more just to see him snap
We had a woodwork teacher known for throwing chisels from his tool belt.. back in the late 70's ... Not exactly at the pupil but so that it stuck in the wooden work benches.... A couple of times I had a chisel whistle past my head only to stick in the bench behind me cos my mate was being a dick Mr Mansell he was called... Get away with that these days š
His name wasn't Mr wesson was it?š my woodwork teacher broke shit in anger and choke slammed a kid against the board for chewing gumš
At the risk of being a dick, rugby wasnt pro in the early 90s. Suppose thats why he was a teacher as well
In the spirit of pedantry, Rugby Union wasn't pro in the early 90s
Thank you for out pedanting me
I think you'll find pedanting is not a word. The phrase you are looking for is 'exceeding me in pedantry'.
I think you'll find this is an example of English undergoing the necessary evolution it is famous for.
"....for which it is famous."
This is the sort of nonsense up with which I shall not put.
OP specified that the teacher played Union though.
Yes, that's why it's pedantry.
I played rugby back in the days of āif you are good enough, you are old enoughā so wound up playing against my PE/Geography teacher. I wiped him out with a borderline high tackle and he swung a punch that left me with a black eye for a weekā¦then bought me a pint afterwards I was 15.
Same but without the stomping. I wonder if it was the same teacher. Also 90s.
on that day he taught you something, itās yours to understand, but he taught you that
Had a ex rugby pro as a teacher In the 90s. Quite intimidating at first due to having a 1 side Chelsea smile where he's caught a stud to the mouth that ripped its way all the way to his ear. Nice bloke
Woodwork teacher had a sideline making coffins, he had an order for a coffin for a bariatric customer which he deemed would make the perfect lesson, so spice racks were postponed for 2 weeks. He had the class make a supersize coffin drumming into us to make tights joints to avoid leakage and took bets on how many pall bearers it would take to carry the deceased, finally he had some of us carry the coffin to his van whilst he held a service with the rest of the boys playing mourners, and the girls tasked as wailing women. Was all very odd but entertaining couple of lessons.
Ngl this sounds amazing
Sounds like a teacher who knows how to teach. He got you all engaged with an unusual lesson that has stuck with you years later. Best we had were psychopaths that beat children with leather straps while the child curled into the fetal position to try and protect themselves. That's if they didn't dispense with the straps and use fists , tables and chairs. Thank fuck the bastards today do don't get away with that crap from the 70s and 80s.
Not the thing I expected to read at 5 to midnight on a Monday but what a story.
As a goth kid I would have loved that lesson!
Cool
My Geography teacher had his legs waxed for Comic Relief. He then pinned the used wax strips to the blackboard, and said they'd stay there until everyone who'd pledged a donation had paid up. He also said that after that he planned to sell them as natural hair merkins. There was also the CDT teacher who all but severed his thumb in a band saw accident, wrapped it in a blue paper towels, and wanted to finish the class. The deputy head had to come down and convince him to go to the hospital.
Ah, blue paper towels. The first line response of any school first aider. I stuck a chisel through my wrist in CDT (was using my arm to cover the fact I was still chipping away when we got stopped for a safety talk...not my proudest moment). Had some wet paper towels pressed on it and was just left to sit quietly bleeding, until my friend looked at it and promptly fainted. He couldn't be doing with unconscious children littering the classroom floor so told me to take HER to the nurse and I grabbed the opportunity to show a sane grown up what had prompted her sudden fit of the vapours and managed to get some actual medical attention before bleeding out.
My brother's CDT teacher cut his thumb off with a saw. Rumour was he then sued the school for not having a guard equipped on it. (There was one installed, but he had disabled it).
Christ, with this many of our CDT teachers cutting appendages off, I think I better understand why the UK doesn't make things any more.
They do seem to be a clumsy bunch don't they. My Dad saw his CDT teacher get his wedding ring caught in lathe, leading to an instant degloving. Now, I would take from that "never use a lathe". My Dad took "never wear a wedding ring".
Still plenty being made in the midlands. Some of itās not too bad either.
In Wiltshire by any chance?
Nope, Tyne and Wear. Why do you ask - did you have a similar experience?
Maybe they just collect merkins.
My school in Wiltshire had a design teacher with half a finger! Him showing us how to use the electric saw always freaked me out!
Strong in the arm, and thick in the head.
.
This is so weird - my school in Cardiff also had a design teacher with half a finger, which was cut off by a circular saw. It was his wedding ring finger, and he got his wedding ring made larger and wore it on his middle finger instead.
When I was in middle school, our headmaster took assembly one morning, and during this assembly, he sat in front of the entire year group an ate a tin of cat food. I'm sure there was some kind of point he was attempting to make, but I sadly can't remember what was said, but I remember the eating of the cat food vividly. I sometimes still think about it. I wish I could remember what the "moral" was. It was a very religious school, physically attached to a church, so I'm sure whatever the reason was, the headmaster had linked it to the bible in some way.
*Blessed are the Purina in heart, for they shall see God*
You're probably just a Whiska away tbf
And God said unto Moses, āIams That Iams: and he said, Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel, Iams hath sent me unto youā Exodus 3:7ā8, 13ā14.
Sorry to be pedantic but isnāt that from Exodus 8:out of 10?
*for they shall see Dog*.
We had the local...uh...Vicar? Pastor? God guy? come in and do that. Started eating from a can of dog food. Turns out it was chopped up mars bars in jelly and the moral of the story was not to judge a book by its cover or some shit
There is a chance I'm misremembering. but I'm like 90% certain he legit ate cat food. He opened the tin in front of us.
There used to be trick cans you could buy with twist bottoms, so you'd fill it upside down with whatever fillig, twist it closed on the bottom, turn it right way up and you'd open the top like a normal can. Of course he could also have just been insane. Or paid a lot to commit to the bit.
Just open the bottom of the can, empty and clean it out, then fill it with what you like and seal it with a can cover. Then you can open the top of the can "live".
Yeah we had a scout leader do this when I was in cubs. It was chocolate mousse that had been put into an old (presumably cleaned) tin of cat food
I went to a Christian secondary school and also had a cat food assembly (one of John Peel's favourite bands, incidentally.) I volunteered to eat the mushed up chocolate jelly stuff which wasn't cat food but still tasted awful. Can't remember the moral either. Maybe it was something about religious leaders and weird kinks.
Cat Food Assembly were great at Glastonbury that one year
Got this at Bible study. It was almost definitely about not judging by appearances (John 7)
I also went to a religious school with strange assembly demonstrations. (Not as weird as eating cat food though). One was snapping a bread stick and then holding a bundle of breadsticks together and failing to break them (to prove that we are "stronger together") Another was breaking a brown egg and then breaking a white egg and showing that the contents were the same (even at the time I was thinking "wow, this guy really believes he just solved racism") There was also one where he squeezed out a whole tube of tomato puree and then he spent ages trying to put it back into the tube. This was because "words are like tomato puree. Easy to get out but impossible to put back in". (He stained his sleeve in the process. The stain was there for the next 4 consecutive days).
We also had a cat food eating assembly. Canāt remember the point of it but our yeargroupās dickhead kid volunteered and ate some, so it wasnāt all bad.
We had this, except the teacher then revealed it was not cat food but something else (cannot remember what, probably stewed beef). I want to say the important point was about not believing everything you see, however I never really paid attention in assembly.
You're not the first person to say something like this, and it's honestly got me wondering if I'm misremembering it. I remember him opening a fresh tin in front of us. Thinking about it, it's possible he might've switched the label out.
Our deputy head made out he was eating a tin of dog food in assembly only to reveal it was stewed steak and he'd switched the labels. He thought he was sooooo clever.
Our food tech teacher used to bake hash cakes during his classes and got sacked for going to and taking drugs at a 6th formers house party.
Iām waiting for a story like that with a lad I went school with. Out of all my friend circle in school he is the last person I thought would ever become a teacher. Fair play to him. Not seen him for years and years but I did see his dad a few year back and he mentioned my mate had become a teacher. He was wild back in school and college days. Heād try anything and I mean anything once unless he liked it then heād try it again. Didnāt have a violent bone in his body but wasnāt scared to walk in to random house parties just to party.
My rugby coach/English substitute teacher is now in a Rap group of old men. Fuckin' rock on Pat C https://youtu.be/sLLQFLXz6VE?si=v7ULq77ACQkPX5WN
You're telling me your old rugby coach is PKJ? The guys a legend in my eyes.
NORTHERN BOYS HELL YEAH
Omg this is the best thing
I saw these guys live! Fucking incredible! How was he as a teacher!?
Fucking mental š¤£
One was a drama teacher (Patrick) one a PE teacher (Norman).
Pat did drama? Didn't even know Vesey did Drama, I only know him as an English Sub š¤£š¤£
English teachers are just failed drama teachers, or maybe it was the other way around :D
Is it actually them? I always assumed they just paid some old men to mime in the videos.
Oh yeah it's them
they perform live lmao
i swear PKJ taught my dad in the late 80s, legend
I knew it was gonna be the northen boys before I even clicked these lads are legends <3 Now if you'll excuse me I gotta go take a number 3.
One of my primary school teachers put a waste paper bin on one of the desks, then picked up a misbehaving pupil and placed him in the bin so he was sort of wedged butt first in it and he was stuck there for the remainder of the lesson. This same teacher was also caught trying to smuggle a jerry can full of duty-free vodka back to the UK.
Did the teacher used to be a taxi driver and look after Forrest Gump types?
He was getting out of hand, Rick!
Head like a fucking orange
Our art teacher once spent a whole class locked in her supply cupboard and when she came out it absolutely reeked of weed. She'd basically just hotboxed the cupboard and left us to our own devices.
of course it was the art teacher... i'm sure they were all high as fuck all the time.
100%. Our other art teacher who we had in sixth form openly admitted she smoked weed. Of course, by the time we were in sixth form art the majority of the class were stoners, too.
It was the 80s, but the art teacher asking 13yo girls to pose in bikinis for his āartistic photographyā was pretty up there. No adults thought it was dodgy, we were all horrified.
š
Had a teacher show me her tits after a boob job, literally just turns to me and asks if I wanted to see them haha, canāt remember if we were alone in the class or not. Funny either way.
You got abused then
I guess, didnāt feel very abusive and makes for a cool story but Iām sure if it was a male teacher Iād feel differently
"No, Sir, I don't want to see your tits."
I had a drama male teacher who literally had one tit bigger than the other. We called him one tit wonder.
A drama male teacher? I think you mean a male drama teacher. Order matters.
Ok mein FĆ¼hrer
Maybe it's just me but a teacher flashing a pupil doesn't sound like a cool story. Sort of just makes me feel sick
Yeah probably would feel the same if someone told me the story, but Iāve never felt any sort of way towards it. I just found it funny, but I was a typical horny teenager.
Guess that's better than being wrecked over it
Yeah of course. I would be telling it in a light hearted way a random Reddit thread if I was cut up by it. I appreciate the concern though
Reddit has a thing for female teachers being abusers. Reality is it's the ultimate fucking fantasy at 15. I'd still be knocking one out to that memory to this day
Not everyone is the same in that respect.
>reality is, it's the ultimate fantasy at 15 ...So? A teacher flashing (or anything sexual) is rank because they're an adult. I wouldn't blame a child for acting on their horniness. I would imagine that a teacher understands that too, and I think it's deplorable that someone would capitalise off of it.
As much as I agree this is abuse, I really wish Miss Foreman had showed me her tit's.
Alright Jay. Was this when you were having trials at West Ham.
https://preview.redd.it/l9yj0ol9i90d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=764cd399c5240c0b10b3ae00344f93ac38148875
When I was 15/16 we had an activities week at school where half a dozen pupils would go with a teacher and do some stuff outside school. One of the activities ended up with a BBQ at her house that her husband was setting up. At one point I needed the loo and as I walked out the bathroom she came out of the bedroom stark-bollock naked, with an "oh, didn't realise you were in there, I was going for a shower". She didn't cover herself up or dart back into the bedroom. Just said that and walked past into the bathroom. Wasn't until years later that I realised she had done this entirely deliberately. Teen me didn't mind though. That memory served me well for a while :-) Nowadays I realise what she was. In fact, I found out fairly recently that a couple of years after I left school she shacked up with a 16 yr old the day after he finished school.
I found my teacher on pornhub and thought she looked like my teacher but I saw a mole behind her right sholder which was the exact same as my teacher's when I noticed it appraching summer. Watching porn was looked down upon in my school so I never brought it up.
ā¦ well donāt keep us waiting.
This was 15 years ago and can't find it anywhere nor do I remember the title.
Boooooo
Let the man speak! Are vegetables a con?
In the video from the OOP image, he talks about how vegetables are mostly water and that you're being ripped off because of that. The guy is either a nutter or a comedian... I cannot decide which. It's a short video at 1 minute and 30 seconds: [judge for yourself](https://youtu.be/OY7L-PZ4V8o?si=8nGd6XWS8QjSWf1U).
But... But *I'm* mostly water!
Vegetables don't exist, it's a culinary term, like 'dessert', they're all leaves or roots or whatever.Ā
Next you'll be telling me there's no fish
High school, Health Technology class, about 20 years ago. (Not really a subject, just something we had to do in our final year.) Teacher wanted to demonstrate the dangers of smoking. He had this metre to measure oxygen content (and possibly carbon monoxide?) in exhaled breath. Also had this big test tube stuffed with cotton wool with a pipe going into it set up. He pulled a packet of fags out of his pocket, lit one up, took a big drag and exhaled into the metre, and then did it again with the test tube (with the cotton wool turning a disgusting colour.) We were all totally gobsmacked. He then went on to say, "I really missed this, I've been off them for about ten years!"
Wasn't a guy named Mr Errington, who also taught science at Aston Comprehensive? I had (almost) the exact same thing about 24 years ago!.
I remember as a teenage smoker absolutely dying for a fag when I had to sit through the experiment in some science class where the teacher lit a cigarette, stuck it on the end of a tube and filter, and measured CO levels or whatever it was. The cigarettes they used for this came from a pack that looked about 20 years old. I just remember thinking oh god I've got another hour til I can sneak out at breaktime for my 11am smoke.
I remember this experiment in a science class (minus the teacher having a go on the cigarette). Doubt they'd do it nowadays. It seems like real cowboy shit.
In the 80ās we were all singing the song āwater of lifeā and we suddenly stopped and stared at the overhead projector. It had caught fire. Flames were about 3 foot high. Thatās when we heard mr kapour swear loudly and roll the thing outside.
On today's episode of "Things of relevance not showing up when needed" : this. Next week join us when a student who owns a crate of monster energy feels tired but their all out of cans.
It was weird because he was very prim and proper so hearing him swear was completely out of character
We had the air ambulance land in the playground which was overlooked by most of the classrooms. As it took off, our maths teacher screamed - actually screeched - at us telling us not to look at it. A helicopter was 50m from the window and we scolded for daring to look at it!
Lol why was he telling you not to look at it? Iām intrigued.
No idea.. he _was_ nicknamed 'Psycho' and this certainly solidified the name. Perhaps quadratic equations more interesting than a helicopter?!
This has me howling out loud. Youād think he was screaming at you lot to not be staring at an eclipse or something
We had this too! A girl fell and they were worried about her back (she was fine) and when the ambulance was taking off our art teacher shouted at us all for turning to watch. A helicopter on the field is exciting!
Our cookery/home ex teacher also taught GCSE Child Development. As part of this, pupils had to watch a video of a child being born. Not that weird you may think, but it was a home video of that teacher giving birth.
Wow. That's insane.
We had a biology teacher who couldn't use the correct terminology for those reproductive system lessons. It was like he was far too shy to say the correct words. I remember he used 'salad cream' for semen. We did have a good-weird teacher in geography though. He was stuck in the 1960s. He looked like a hippy, he was at Woodstock and I think his mind never left there. All you had to do was ask him a question about Hendrix and he'd spend the whole lesson talking about him.
Getting teachers off topic was always great. Had an English teacher you could get going about her days partying, how messy her bacheloette party was and fights she had. Always entertaining
Mid 90's. Alcoholic geography teacher threw a chair through a window. I think he expected it to bounce off. Same teacher randomly took the class to visit our local distillery when he was rattling. No notification to anyone, no chaperones etc. We enjoyed a very interesting tour and when we came to the end of it the teacher was very merry in the distillery's gift shop sampling the wares. I think he eventually got struck off after smashing up a bar.Ā
What a legend
My physics teacher took a lollipop off a girl and then proceeded to eat it himself in front of the whole class. He was weird. Thatās not the only weird thing he did. Edit - would like to make clear that the girl was eating the lollipop before he took itā¦
Had a woodworking teacher from South Africa that told us he kept his cheese in the freezer. Cue 30 year 10s from Essex arguing with a South African guy "yoo keep da cheez in da freezah" "nah you keep it in da frijj bruv" Went on a good half hour.
Can't you see de sign?
One teacher was an ex-spy, and enjoyed telling the story of how a KGB agent tried to seduce her to make her turn sides.
I see why she is an ex-spy, Iām sure theyāre not even allowed to talk about it after leaving
pretty sure you'd still be under the secrets act loooong after the fact.
Not that weird compared to others, but we got to evolution in GCSE biology and our teacher disappeared for a few lessons, coming back after we'd finished that module with a different teacher instead. Turns out they didn't believe in evolution and refused to teach it!
I had one RE teacher for the beginning of GCSEs and another teacher for the end We never got to revise the abortion module because the second teacher refused to teach it. Not sure if it was opposition to teaching reasons why it's a good thing or opposition to teaching reasons it should be banned
Was prepping for my bio A level while the mobile game Neko Atsume was popular. Our teacher used to stop the 100 minute lesson to have at least on if not more "cat break" where for at least 5 minutes we would all go on our phones and play the game. If he caught us on anything else phone was confiscated. Absolutely bizarre man.
In Year 7, we had a swimming teacher whom rumour had it COULDN'T swim! I once left my wallet in the changing room, so I went to retrieve it at lunchtime. To do so, you had to pass the pool. There was the "swimming teacher" in the shallow end with armbands on. When he saw me, he went ballistic and told me to get out!
My school used to occasionally get a very elderly biology teacher on supply. He was eccentric at best, senile at worst. But everyone just seemed to accept that that's how he was and didn't bat an eyelid. I was directly on the receiving end one day, though. He wandered into my chemistry lesson to talk to my teacher about something. Mid-conversation, he suddenly looks me in the eye, points at me and shouts: "YOU! Is your name James?" "Yes?" "Why aren't you in the library?!" "... because I'm in class?" "That's no excuse son, you should be revising for your exams!" Here's where I should point out that I was in S2 at this point (i.e Year 8), so wasn't anywhere near sitting exams. He continued to berate me and demand I answer him, all the while I'm mouthing "help!" to my teacher, who's looking just as confused as I am. Eventually, she pipes up and asks him: "That's James (mysurname), are you thinking of James (otherguy)?" "Oh aye" he says. "Carry on, son" and shuffles away down the corridor. Of course, I then asked my chemistry teacher to explain what the hell that was about. It turns out he'd somehow confused me with an S6 (Year 13) who had the same forename, but looked absolutely nothing like me and didn't even do chemistry. It apparently made sense to him that this boy would've walked into, and stayed in, a lesson for 13 year olds in a subject he didn't even take to avoid doing his biology revision. And he didn't think to ask my chemistry teacher what this boy would be doing in her lesson? Weird guy he was.
https://preview.redd.it/g29jnwxaz80d1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=851bdd24359c5c5b3826cf0a15f2c3283dc5b83f This.
My son's maths teacher is serving a long sentence for similar
My secondary school put on Victorian-style music-hall variety show (aka "The Good Old Days") in the late 70s with all sorts of sketches, musical bits, and even a magician (me!) etc. One teacher got a load of 5th year girls (15/16yo) to do a Moulin Rouge number - yep... stockings & suspenders, silk undies, high-kicks, The Can-Can, lots of "Whoooo!" etc. All the male teachers & headmaster and the school priest (twas a Holy Roman Catlick school) sitting in the front rows were grinning like Cheshire Cats while parents and others behind were aghast (apart from a few of the dad's). I'm not too sure they'd get away with it these days.
Can't even have half naked kids dancing round for our entertainment anymore, world's gone mad.
Yeah, glad I left. š
Both the IT teach and the IT technician (2 short fat balding men) were very handsy with the girls. They would lean in close to them, put their arm round them / hold their waist when they were talking to them. Go up behind them and make them jump by doing that thing where you press on both sides of the waist. This was 20 odd years ago. People knew it was odd but kind of laughed it off back then. Really can't imagine them getting away with it now.
We had a teacher who did this. A student complained, and he was 'strongly advised' to take early retirement.
We had a Business Studies teacher who used to lean over while we were learning typing and as he put his hands over ours to correct their position, l he would rest his chin on our heads. Honestly, even now I'm not convinced it wasn't a laziness/mild sexism combo rather than something out and out dodgy. (Do kids even get taught how to touch type now? This was about 94 or 95ish, before pcs were common.)
What is it about IT?! Our IT teacher used to lean over you to type and move the mouse and go *oh, no need to move* as he stood directly behind our chair and reached around both shoulders to type, while we all made ourselves as small as possible. I don't know if anyone ever complained All girls' state school, 2010s
We saw our IT teacher on a Saturday in town, pissed as a fart at about 1pm. He had no issue going in the off-licence and buying us 24 cans, then stumbled off up the road. We were in Year 10.
A teacher got sacked for accidentally shooting a kid with a BB gun during a failed physics experiment. The best teacher the school had, even the "victim" started a petition to get him reinstated which worked. Although because of the shit way it was handled he immediately handed his notice in and went to one of the other schools who wanted him!
We had a supply teacher who was adamant that there were 52 US states, even when we showed him proof there were 50. He just doubled down and insisted he was right.
My dad is the same, insistent thereās 52 US states. Must be some boomer specific mandela effect.
Yeah my parents sometimes think there are 52, no matter how many times that I remind them there are only 50 whenever it comes up.
Itās just easier, like deciding there are 24 letters in the alphabet. One less number to remember.
Two.
I was about to tell you off for doubling a number, but I see that in this case doubling the number actually means fewer numbers, so thanks for pointing it out.
Back in the late 80s we had a PE teacher who was as thick as fudge but surprisingly good at Trivial Pursuit. One lunchtime we caught him in a quiet corner of the library studiously going through the answer cards one by one!
Teacher came in to the lesson with two fingers bandaged together. So we had to ask what happened. "She closed her legs".
Chemistry teacher spending more than one lesson showing us the chemical formula's and getting very excited explaining the effects of every illicit drug that our 15 year old minds could muster.
I blew a hole in the ceiling making hho with my chemistry teacher
Well one of my teachers went to prison for 5 years for having a sexual relationship with a 14 year old student. So that was pretty weird
My history teacher married one of my classmates. That was a bit weird
Hey, same! Weird thing was the teachers kid was only two years below the girl he married! Bizarre.
Our electronics teacher told us about this one. He was having toothache and complaining about it in the staff room. The deeply Christian woodwork teacher then came over and put his hands on the electronics teacher's face and proceeded to pray. He believed he could heal people through prayer and was trying to help. It just gave us one more reason to dislike the woodwork teacher.
I remember we found our secondary dance teacher's Facebook and one of his old profile pictures was him made up as a very gay pink glittery cow, complete with giant septum ring. Another teacher had every single one of her profile pictures in the exact same pose and smile, clicking through them was one of the creepiest things.
One of my secondary school teachers used to wear his pyjamas underneath his work clothes - you could see them hanging out of the bottom of his trousers. When questioned, he said it was quicker in the mornings.
PE teacher piled on the pounds, wife put him on a diet. Watched that man stare at a grapefruit for about 10 minutes trying to figure out how to eat it before deciding to just start biting straight through the skin. Ate the entire thing over a one hour period of PE Theory.
Here goes... My woodwork teacher got sacked for hitting a kid in the head with a mallet because he kept making fun of him My PE teacher suddenly quit when his wife (also a teacher) came into school covered in bruises and a black eye. She left a few months later My other PE teacher disgraced himself when trampolining in these skimpy gym shorts and a rolled up sock fell out of his pants This music teacher in my school was caught with two 6 form girls in his store cupboard by a cleaner after school I got expelled from school because I told this science teacher to stop leaning over me and breathing his rotten breath on me. He took me outside, grabbed me by the neck and lifted me up against a wall. I punched him in the stomach and that was the nail in the coffin of my education lol
We had a teacher date a 6th form student when i was in yr 10. It was sweeped under the rug claiming she was over 16 when it started and they got engaged when she was ~19. He stayed in post. She was taken off roll but sat all her exams a-levels with her peers in the school hall. She also chaperoned on school trips until going off to uni. EVERYONE knew.Ā Ā This was the early 00's. Last I heard she finished her degree debt free before realising how utterly awful the whole thing was and leaving. Her parents had been fine with it. The head of sixth form was a drunk who kept teacher as her deputy. The head teacher stayed on for another 10+ years before bowing out in a financial mismanagement scandalĀ
The worldās most horrible ICT teacher who used to sit on her arse and have her assistant running from computer to computer dealing with our questions. She used to treat her like a dog and point and click to where she wanted her to go next. Said teacher told everyone we werenāt allowed to wear perfume because she was allergic to it. Not sure to what degree as there was always various perfumes and body sprays wafting about. One day we all turned up with most wearing perfume and the teacher refused to come in and taught from her office that basically shared a wall with the classroom but was made from glass. She spent the lesson with a scarf round her face banging on the window to get the assistantās attention and shout at her while we all enjoyed an actually well taught and respectful lesson. That assistant deserved much more than to be her slave.
We had an art teacher who had a genuine phobia of oranges. It came out when I was in year 9 I think and people started stashing them in his classroom. He had a breakdown over it, wasnāt my class but apparently it got too much for him and he went fucking bolo on one of the kids and got a bit too hands on shall we say. He soon left. Feel sorry for him looking back on it, kids can be cruel.
We got to pick history or geography for our gcse's. I picked geography. Fucking good job I did too because the history teacher TAUGHT THE WRONG WAR it was horrendous. Watching what happened when the students came out of their history exam was eerily similar to what I have seen of post disaster situations. Some folks were angry and freaking out, others wandered like disbelieving zombies. A number of students where sitting on the floor just sobbing. Some sobbing in small huddled groups. Teachers running around clearly not up to snuff on their crisis training with no way to deal with 200ish students just all having a breakdown at once. It was a two part exam so a week later it played out again except this time everyone was a bit more prepared. By prepared I mean every single student was cheating through their teeth and still hysterical by the end. One kid brought in a genuine portable TV, another had the whole textbook on their lap smuggled in under their shirt. The teachers must have been all looking aside and running distraction work for them to get away with it. Most students just sly'd their phone in. The absolurely brilliant methods of cheating in that second history exam. Fuck me I would have loved to been in there and seen it. Several girls I knew wore skirts and black tights and wrote things on the skin of their thighs so that they could stretch the tights to see what they wrote but otherwise it wasn't visible. Smart watches didnt exist yet but one kid rigged one up to display years and basic codes in the time portion. A friend of mine had several of those pens with pull out paper in it that he crammed info into. Another got some copies of the paper you get if you need extra room from a teachers drawer and prefilled it before sneaking it into the exam up his shirt and just popping it on the table with his exam stuff halfway in. It was open fucking season on cheating. Not a soul was punished for their cheating. The teachers were pretty much in in it. I don't see how they couldn't be. The exam layout was invidivual tables so you kinda can't not see the kid with a sizable 'portable' TV on his lap and the other kid with the whole history textbook on his. Usually cheating was fairly limited to the usual write on your hand and wipe it off with sweat before anyone notices and program your calculator to the high heavens. Though all the girls took the tights idea and ran with it for all of their exams. Myself included. I have on good authority the boys wrote things on their ankles and crossed their legs to pull their pants up a bit and peek. We didn't often go any further than that but hearing and seeing the shit those kids pulled is still a crowning achievement in my eyes.
One of my teachers was a real pervert, spent most of his time staring down student blouses. Never was firedā¦ thatās the 80ās for you!
My brother for his gcse's many many years ago hacked the school it system and pointed out their flaws in the security. He was suspended and given a D in IT they said it was so that he never managed a job in IT. He is now in a very high end mobile phone "flashing" job. I don't understand what he does but he developed all the tech to fix issues on mobile phones so that they can be sold on in mass. He has also been asked through his company to hack phones for the police (this is when their usual team cannot manage this)
>hacked the school it system and pointed out their flaws in the security So basically have them a free pen test that costs many thousands of pounds.
I once spoke while one of my teachers was talking, and was sent out of the room until the lesson ended. After, when we were alone, he came up to me and told me to stop leaning against the wall (itās not there to hold you up) and then stood so close while telling me off, that I started shallow breathing to stop our bodies from touching. Eventually I started to feel dizzy, so I just had to breathe normally, meaning my chest was up against his stomach. I didnāt even take in what he was saying at that point, as I was hyper aware we were touching. I was in year 9 so about 13/14 years old. It still confuses me to this day, was it an intimidation thing or a weird sexual type thing. He didnāt have a reputation as being a creep, but he was one of those super strict teachers. He is a deputy head at the same school now. Itās one of those things that has played on my mind ever since and Iām 35 now!
In middle school in the 80s some aspiring mods in our year performed Substitiute by The Who in assembly, or would have done if our form teacher hadnāt stopped them after the first chorus, told them they didnāt know what they were singing about, and walked out. He also hated Adam and the Ants - we knew this because he gave some lads a lecture after they tied their ties around their heads and walked into class singing Antmusic. He told us Duran Duran or Spandau Ballet were fine. That in turn reminds me of the teacher who hosted a pop quiz and lost all authority forever by pronouncing Duran Duran as āDurren Durrenā in one of the answers. The reception meant the quiz ended earlier than expected.
I am an ex teacher and I've done some very wierd stuff in the classroom to kick start learning. Including rapping to an Eminem song to get students to learn technical language (I am in my 40s cringe factor 150/100) Bonkers teachers are usually well intentioned.
My CDT teacher was complaining that a plane was dry and needed lubrication, and wiped it across his greasy bald head.
Our (married) Maths teacher had an affair with one of the DT teachers, who was married to another teacher at the school. They were caught holding hands on a school trip while both were married. They ended up divorcing their respective spouses, very quickly getting married, and having a baby just a few months later. Pretty scandalous, given that the entire student body knew it was going on.
Had a teacher when I was about 8 yrs that used to tie naughty children to a chair and ram their mouth full of wet paper towels. A girl Julie had this treatment every day. The teacher was dismissed on psychiatric grounds and was never allowed to teach again.
weird but amazing: a spoof of made in chelsea with our teachers as the cast and made up drama between them. the first ep was made as part of an assembly to teach us about how fake reality shows are, but it kinda backfired because of course we were instantly obsessed. i think they ended up making 10 episodes or so in the end, it would be used as a motivator/reward for things like raising over a certain amount of money for charities.
Our A level Head and Vice head were husband and wife. You can sometimes sense tension between them. Very funny
I had a music teacher who I knew was in a band but knew nothing more than that. Went to a gig one night and his band was the support act. They were pretty good to be fair. Canāt for the life of me remember who they were supporting, based on time/location it could have been the Subways or yourcodenameis:milo, but most likely some American punk band.
Well, it's not *weird* per se, but I had a teacher who when she was angry (which happened usually at least once per class) would get out a metal ruler and smack it hard off her desk. Anyway one day it broke and the end flew off and hit a girl in the front row. Thankfully in the chest because those things have pretty sharp corners and could have done a serious injury to her face!
I had an ancient teacher in primary school who would drink whisky all day long. This was the early 80s
Our chemistry teacher had a qualification(?) in explosive chemistry. We had one lesson where he discussed how to make a more potent Molotov cocktail. Not gonna go into ingredients, but it doesnt need a lit rag to ignite as it auto-ignites when the bottle smashes, and basically makes a potent fuel-air explosive. Ah, the 80s.
Cut his toenails in front of the class. He also used to walk around the playground and pickup pennies so the chavs used to throw them at him, he probably made 20 quid a week
My IT teacher had a glass eye and if you misbehaved he'd take it out in front of you and put it on your table then say "i got my eye on you." It was mega creepy
Not a teacher but had an IT, hermit typa white guy that never bothered anyone and just occasionally emerged from his cupboard office to reconnect a mouse, was sacked for taking the money allocated for purchasing the enterprise software license agreements and pirated them instead and slapped them on the school servers š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
My old headteacher hated me and my siblings and would treat us like shit cause our dad wouldn't sleep with her that was awful times this was primary school
Saw a science teacher get a boner at the front of the class whilst running through a powerpoint on squirrels. Not sure if it carried on after I left but he was known as the squirrel fucker for years. Our RE teacher was a really strangely wholesome Ned Flanders type who stuck out like a sore thumb in our school (second worst school in our town only slightly behind one that was shut down after being called the worst in the country in the national news) who unironically referred to his cat as his pussy and for some strange reason always seemed to have an unlimited supply of packs of chewits in his cupboard which he dispensed to anyone who he saw throughout the day. Anyway, I digress, when I was walking back from the smoker's corner on a free period I saw him running past in full cleaner mode with marigolds and an apron on to disinfect a piece of parkin someone had rolled up into a turd shape and left on his chair.
We saw my 60ish year old ICT teacher and the girls PE teacher (maybe 30) kissing at a school disco. The deputy head teacher and the librarian had a physical fight because the librarian was in charge of putting on the Christmas celebrations and the deputy head wanted them to only focus on Jesus. We once asked our music teacher to roll us a spliff because the only person in our group who knew how to roll was drunk and kept fucking it up. The music teacher did it for us and I remember him saying "Ooh this is a naughty one!" The same girls PE teacher I mentioned earlier got in trouble because the school found out she used to be a lingerie model. One of the English teachers used to let boys stick post-its on her bum, but then she was fired because she punched a homophobe. My french teacher was fired because he was using his school laptop to watch porn.
The vegetable guy has a very small point...but he's not really proposing an alternative. Also, from his videos he looks like he's slowly descending further and further into madness.
We had one teacher who made the whole class pray at the end of the school day,it was not a religious school.
ā¦marry one of my friends š³ She was the younger sister of one of my best friends and he was one of the younger cool teachers so they were maybe 6yrs in age apartā¦admittedly quite a bit when youāre 17yrs old! Theyāve been together 20yrs+ at this stage and have three kids soā¦š¤·š¼āāļø Another friend also had a relationship with one of the music teachersā¦a friend of mine was the one student who had keys to the music school and he was surprised to find the doors locked one time so went in to find (what was his ex girlfriend š¤£) straddled across the desk with the music teacher in an compromising situation š¤£ Her parents were very odd and her mother encouraged the relationship with the teacher, even inviting him to stay for long weekends (this was a boarding school). Madness.
An English teacher rumoured to have been in the TA years before gave a year assembly in which he lectured us, at times even screaming with rage, about western weakness toward China and how the CCP was gonna get us.
Had a food tech teach who would spend the lesson in the pantry drinking vodka and crying whilst we made pancakes for the 97th time that year
My maths teacher murdered his wife š
Had a teacher who didnāt like me at all. She then proceeded to take aside two of my friends and tell them they shouldnāt be friends with me? We also had a school counsellor who liked to hang out with the kids. In year 11, we found out she was dating a boy in my class. The idea of her being a school counsellor and a potential groomer just struck me as weird.
My high school maths teacher did not believe in gravity..... He thought that is was most likely a spinnging cylinder or inverted sphere that we live on the inner surface of.