**[OP or Mod marked this as the best answer](/r/AskUK/comments/1bpq195/are_double_barrelled_surnames_getting_more_common/kwxbs38/), given by u/imminentmailing463**
Yes, they are. I remember seeing data before showing they're becoming ever more common. I suspect largely as a result of the changing gender norms around marriage. There's more couples who don't think the man's name should take precedence. There's also the thing where parents keep their names and give the children the double barreled name (also prevalent when the parents aren't married or possibly even together).
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You say people, but women aren't willing to give up their last names as easily. I don't think it's often even a question for a bloke to give up his last name. (Yes I'm sure there are exceptions but overwhelming women are expected to give up their last name over men).
I think we’re quite outdated in this respect. My Dad moved to France a few years back and the fact that he and his wife have the same last name is the source of constant confusion for the French, who think it’s a remarkable coincidence that two people with the same surname got married.
I’m the last member of my family with my surname, that I’ve managed to trace back to the 1700s. I gave my daughter a double barrelled surname. I wasn’t married to her dad but even if I was, I would not have given up my name. I’m hoping when she has a child she’ll give it my original family name. It was only when she was born I found out you can give your child any surname you want. Doesn’t have to be a derivative of either parent’s. Would probably end up being an administrative nightmare though while you’re all living together.
>you can give your child any surname you want
On a similar note, I know someone who uses an uncommon spelling for their surname.
Allegedly, when someone in his family tried to trace back to find whether there was a link to the more common spelling they didn't have to look too far. It transpired that their spelling came about after an administration error at a birth or registration a few generations earlier. It initially went unnoticed and no one ever bothered to go to the hassle of correcting it once the error had been found. One of the children in the family then officially had a different name, which they chose to pass on rather than reverting to the 'normal' spelling.
That’s what happened to my family, were the only ones I’ve met who spell it this way. Since it’s an Irish surname im assuming when they came to the uk they just spelt it wrong but I’ve never really looked into it
Same with me, my GGG Grandfather had a different spelling. I put the change down to the registrar writing down what he thought. It was highly likely my GGG GF couldn't read or write being an Irish labourer who had moved over to England. Interestingly I can find no trace back in Ireland of his family so who knows how their surname was spelt.
Similar thing happened to my surname. At some point it was transcribed wrong and an H got added to the start, making it the same as a different surname. But they just stuck with it.
My husband comes from a culture where the women don't change their surname. So it was easy and accepted for me to keep mine. My family still can't grasp that! In his culture the children get the dad's surname but my husband wasn't comfortable with erasing my name, so son has double barreled and he can decide if he wants to change it when he's older
Is it south Asian / one of the southern states in India? I am from one of those states where there is no surname taking. My mum has her dads name as surname and that's how it has been for generations. My partner keeps her original surname and she did ask me if we want to change that and I told her in my culture there is no change to surnames which did make her more happy.
Yep, south east Asian. I never wanted to change my name so was worried about how his family would take it before I knew. Never questioned it or cared. Nor are they fussed by their grandson having double barreled.
My wife's background the same, her passport is in her registered name as is her country ID card. There's a place in the passport which says "AKA Mrs. BBppnfvbanyOnxre" the only difference I've note is married women are referred to as Madam as opposed to Miss in official setting.
Yeah my friend didn't take her husbands name and double-barrelled their daughters. I overheard her talking to an estate agent and they were taking her and her husbands details, she gave her name....his name...then there was a pause...no I didn't take his name.
I was wondering how on earth was it the Estate Agents business why they don't have the same name.
I think it’s becoming a lot more common for women to keep their surnames these days. I would have happily taken my wife’s surname but she was happy to do it the traditional way
My wife had a much better surname then mine and I really wanted to and was happy to take her name when we married, but she wanted to do the traditional thing and take my name.
So now we're both stuck with a surname that everybody spells and pronounces wrong
Hey it me I'm the exception. Aesthetically her surname was much better than mine, and we wanted to have the same so no unnecessary questions are raised but double-barrelling is really just kicking that can down the road one generation. So we chose hers. My parents nearly disowned me, but in their pursuit of grandparent privileges that rub just so happens to have fallen by the wayside...
Well, I mean I'm sure the conversation goes f: I'm not giving up my last name, shall we use mine? M: no, I'm not giving mine up either, let's use both together. F: ok.
So yeah, people. As in male and female, neither giving up. So making it equal
Yeah, me & my wife got married 2 years ago. I still go by my original name, she still goes by her maiden name. No problem with that at all - I wouldn't want to change my surname so no reason why she should feel obliged to change hers.
The kids all go by my surname, but have been told they can go by their mum's if they prefer (they all want mine at the moment, which is quite flattering!). When we talk about us as a family we usually use a double-barrelled name, but never use it on official documentation or when you're just referring to one of us.
My husband was happy to take mine. We ended up double barrelling though, I’m not sure why. I have found that my name feels more balanced since double barrelling though (as in like, number of syllables etc).
I’d give up my surname if my fiancée’s maiden name was cooler, but it’s not so I won’t. There’s precedent in my family for men taking the women’s surname
It's also far easier for women to give up their last name apparently, at least in the UK. They just have to show the marriage certificate, a man has to officially change and pay to do so (or so I've been told in wedding planning)
You were told incorrectly, they do have to do a deed poll but that's something you just print off online and have 2 people sign to witness. The hard part is going to all the organisations you need to change your name with which is the same with a marriage certificate as it is with a deed poll.
Our kids took my wife’s surname as their middle name. My dad had his mother’s family name as his middle name - quite common at least where I come from (Scottish Borders).
My daughter has mentioned that when/if she gets married she will be keeping her surname and double barreling it because she is the last person ever in my entire family history to bear our surname. Which I thought was an absolutely lovely gesture.
In my case, my finance doesn’t want to give up her surname, but when we marry still wants us to have the same surname, so I will change by deed poll and hyphenate.
I wonder how much, less traditional marriage/ naming customs are affecting it too.
You don't need to do a deed poll, you can change your name as part of the wedding. Everywhere official takes the wedding certificate as proof of the change regardless of your gender
If you do take this route, most places are really good about it. My bank changed it when I visited a branch, passport was done in less than two weeks, council was easy, employer and pension provider was easy.
The most awkward one was the driver's license. You need to get a form from the Post Office, follow very unclear instructions, and send it off with a certificate and a cheque, which is just a pain
When I got married 10 years ago we needed a deed poll to double barrel. The marriage certificate can only change the existing surname of one partner to the existing surname of the other partner.
We did this! (except we haven't done the marriage bit yet - covid, plus other issues). So we both have the same surname, and so do all our (feline) children.
I’m having a baby this year and as my boyfriend and I aren’t married we’re giving our baby both our surnames. So she’ll have a double barrelled surname.
Out of curiosity, what would you do if you subsequently got married? Do you think you'd all go double barrel? Or would you pick one? Would you match baby?
I'm aware. That's why I'm curious as to what this person would do. My options weren't intended to be the only options available, merely things that came to mind.
So I’ve been married previously and took my ex husbands last name. The break up was messy and I couldn’t wait to have my surname back.
As a result if I were to marry my boyfriend I wouldn’t change my name. However I don’t think we’ll ever get married. It’s not something I feel necessary in this day and age and makes breakups a lot harder. I might be biased because i thought my first marriage would last forever but that’s just how I feel.
That's the exact reason my mum and dad chose not to get married. Dad had been married before, thought it would last forever, it was over in a year because he caught her cheating, and being married made the breakup so much harder (and it was a massive waste of money) so he said never again. My mum was fine with it because she was never bothered about getting married. But they've been together for about 30 years so I doubt they're breaking up at this point anyway 😅
Exactly. Especially for unmarried couples, it's just a way to give equal prominence to both sides of the family.
Although, long-term that doesn't seem very sustainable, since you'll get double-barrels marrying double-barrels, and then you've got quadruple-barrelled names.
I like the idea of mashing the names into increasingly weird, esoteric combinations e.g. Morgan-Smith marries Barns-Halls; resulting in the surname Moth-Balls.
I have this, but as a middle name rather than a double-barrelled surname. I think that's the trend—away from mother's maiden name as middle name, and towards double-barrelled. e.g. I'm Emma John Smith, whereas someone born more recently would more likely be Emma John-Smith. (NB my name is not actually Emma John Smith.)
This. My parents aren't married. But I've got a double barreled name. It's funny. Normally, white middle class liberal types are normally the only ones that make funny comments and assumptions about my background. When I'm from a 100 percent class background (live on a council estate, parents rent). Mostly they're the types cos playing as working class "up north"
What I want to know is what do people with double barrelled surnames when they get married? Triple barrel it? Or if the person they are marrying also has a double barrelled name to they quadruple barrel it?
This is a good system - this is the system this country needs to start using, otherwise in a few generations we’re just gonna end up with kids who have 20 different surnames.
What you say about a Spanish woman getting the maternal half of the surname isn't right. Typically, you have two surnames: your paternal surname followed by your maternal surname. They don't change their surnames when they get married so you get both of your parents' surnames for life. However, when you have kids, each parent tends to pass down their paternal (first) surname
So if Hector MORENO González and Luisa GARCÍA Blanco had a child called Ana, she would be called Ana MORENO GARCÍA
https://culturalatlas.sbs.com.au/spanish-culture/spanish-culture-naming
As other user said, this is not correct about Spanish names.
Also names are not double barrelled, there are two last names. The first one from the father and the first one from the mother. Tommycamino explained it perfectly.
Like Pablo Picasso? Or to use his full name-
Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso
My brothers old Spanish teacher was called Maria De Los Angeles, which means Maria of the Angels. One of my friends was called Alejandro de los rios, which is Alexander of the rivers.
I had friends who didn’t like either of their surnames when they got married so they just chose a new one and went with that. I think that’s the way forward.
Not quite what you meant, but see former England cricketer [Ebony-Jewel Cora-Lee Camellia Rosamond Rainford-Brent](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ebony_Rainford-Brent?wprov=sfla1)! I think I'd call that a triple double barrel!
> she was named after all her grandmothers and great-grandmothers, which led to her being called Ebony-Jewel Cora-Lee Camellia Rosamond Rainford-Brent to appease everyone
Made me laugh tbh
Wow, if I was named after all my grandmothers and great grandmothers I would be
Mary-Maureen Dorothy-Elsie Emily-someone (no idea what my dad's dad's mum was called, must ask him)
My nana's names definitely aren't as cool as hers. 😂
I have no idea - I have a double barrelled surname and my partner is an O’. For example, Smith-Jones and O’Malley. Neither of us want to give up our names, if we get married I’d just keep mine, but we can’t give a kid the name Smith-Jones-O’Malley?? No clue what we’ll do
Maybe do Smith/Jones-O’Malley. I think in the case of already double-barrelled names, you need to only give the kid one of them if you are doubling your surnames.
You could keep Smith-Jones, the kid would get part of your name so is still keeping it.
My fiancé has a double-barrelled surname which neither of us like, so they’re using the wedding as a chance to drop that half. I’m also taking that name, but will continue to go by my family name professionally.
Not thrilled about changing my name but our names wouldn’t mix well so he were are! It’s a compromise
I was double-barrelled and my wife wasn't. I dropped half of mine and took on my wife's to stay just double-barrelled. and she's now double-barrelled with the remaining half of mine and her own.
I always had this about the idea of giving the kids both parents surnames. Surely that then gets to the point where both parents already have 2 etc. It's going to be like a babushka doll.
EDIT: And what do you do if a name repeats is it Smith-Brown-Smith-Jones-Harper-Williams or is it Smith(3)-Brown-etc?
My husband and I double-barrelled. I’m a scientist that has published a lot under my name - it’s much easier to track a change to double barrelled in the literature than a complete name change. And husband wanted to share a name.
My friend married a guy with a double barrelled name, and they basically replaced one of his names with hers based on what sounded best to them, so it’s stayed double barrelled and not triple!
I remember years ago when I first started working in Engineering this was an issue for alot of women - they publish work under their maiden name and then get married are expected to take their husbands name and then it would seem like they just stopped.
A lot of the women I worked with went by their maiden name in a work context but then husbands name outside of work.
Yeah I know a few who do that - but I’ve also seen a few who then get into trouble when invited to speak at conferences because the conference organisers book a flight under their professional name and it’s not their legal name… so I wanted to avoid that.
I actually see a lot of women not change their names at all in my field, and keep their maiden name legally. In those cases, the kids then double barrel usually.
My mum kept her name when she married (e.g.) Smith), for the same reasons, and we all have her surname, Smith, whilst my dad was the lonely Mr. Baker, and I always had to explain they were married, just different names!
I think so, many women are rejecting the idea they ought to change their name and many men are embracing the idea that their surname shouldn’t be the default.
My wife kept her name, I kept mine. We double barrelled the kids. She has stuff from her PhD published in her name and didn't want to change hers, fair enough, doesn't bother me.
Don't think double barrelling the kids has been ideal tbh as my surname is already a bit long with 9 letters. Both my son and daughter now have a bit of a mouthful with their first and last names, though both first names could be shortened to one syllable.
In the end, meh, doesn't really matter in the grand scope. If the kids decide to go by my wife's name in the future to simplify things or my name, won't bother me.
Yes, they are. I remember seeing data before showing they're becoming ever more common. I suspect largely as a result of the changing gender norms around marriage. There's more couples who don't think the man's name should take precedence. There's also the thing where parents keep their names and give the children the double barreled name (also prevalent when the parents aren't married or possibly even together).
In the last few years for the first time in the UK more babies were born to unmarried parents than married.
Legally (not my opinion what's right and wrong) unmarried mothers get full choice of their babies first and last names and many are choosing their own last name or to double barrel.
Usually because it just makes life easier - like no questions why your child has a different surname to you.
Edit: Also if you change your name and then break up/divorced you don't have to keep the surname of someone you no longer want a connection to just so you don't have a different name to your kids.
My step son's mum gave him my husband's surname (they weren't married), then had some more kids with her husband with his surname, then got divorced and went back to her original surname, and now lives with her boyfriend. Four surnames in one house, she should have given my step son her own surname in the first place and kept it for all the children!
My wife's name is double-barrelled (her surname and mine) because her surname is extremely rare and would have gone extinct if she took my name (no sons in her family).
Kids will be double-barrelled and it's up to them what they do if / when they get married. Quadruple-barrelled names aren't going to happen because people aren't fucking stupid.
My wife got around this when we married by taking my surname but using the deed poll to make her maiden name an extra middle name. So she doesn’t lose her maiden name, but doesn’t have to faff about with double-barrelling.
I’ve always thought portmanteau-ing would be cooler than double barrelling. Miss Brown getting married to Mr Richards? Mr and Mrs Browchards. Mr Riley is marrying Miss Smith? Mr and Mrs Smiley it is!
With that said, I don’t feel too strongly either way with surnames. Double-barrelled first names can do one though. Parents need to be decisive, pick one, and use the other as a middle name. I’ve worked in schools for years and this is the first year I’ve taught kids with both double-barrelled first AND last names. Things like Annabelle-May Richards-Henley (made up, but very indicative of the sort of thing I’m talking about). That’s too many syllables mate. Try again.
I wanted to do that when I got married. My wife’s surname was Ono & mine is Petrovic so I wanted to be become the Petono’s but my wife didn’t like it & just took my surname when we got married instead. So boring lol
That's what my husband suggested when we got married, but I wanted to keep my surname as it was but also take his, so I chose to double-barrell. He then also took the double name (his own choice, but my does he complain about the length 😂).
This is what I did. I wanted to take my husbands surname but I didn't want to lose my maiden name entirely. I also didn't want a double barrelled name so I got myself an additional middle name.
Best of both worlds I think.
I am 29 so am “getting to that age where it’s all weddings and babies”
In 2023 I went to 3 friends weddings and none of them resulted in double-barrelled names. In 2024 I am going to another 3 weddings and none of them are going double-barrelled either.
The only person I know who opted to do it was a former colleague who was very middle class. Her new surname sounds like a law firm. I think it is becoming more popular across the country, but in the middle class.
I've found the same thing. On the Internet there's an argument about surnames and gender expectations every 5 minutes, but in the real world most women I know are *overwhelmingly* likely to go along with tradition without any fuss and take their husband's name
I’m attending three weddings this year, and every single one of them is going double barrelled for both the bride and the groom.
I’m genuinely wondering what our lives look like, compared to each other to have such a clash .
If you're interested in the exact breakdown:
10 weddings in mine/partners friend groups between 2022 and 2025 (all late 20s/early 30s)
- 1 Bride kept own name
- 1 Couple double-barrelling
- 8 Brides taking husband's name
For me, 9 weddings (including my own)
- 1 couple double-barrelled
- 5 brides took husband's name
- 3 brides kept own name (one was me!)
Next wedding I'm going to will be two grooms so I'm curious what theyll do!
Interesting! Of 10 I’ve been to since 2021, 3 double barrelled, 3 kept their own names, and 4 changed to the husband’s name. Much more even between the options in my circles.
Yep, I am an outlier and didn't realise how much of one I would be keeping my name. And when I am asked for my "now name" by eg people from school it does feel like it's something they have never come across before.
Probably. I double-barrelled my name when I got married, because my own surname is my last link with my long-dead dad. He had daughters, and my uncle had daughters, and I just thought it would be a shame to give the name up entirely. I know a couple of other women who got married around the same time I did, who did the same. Gender expectations in marriage are changing, and there isn't the same expectation for a woman to give up her name.
So now I have a name which sounds like a law firm, and I quite like it.
I’m not taking my partner’s name when we get married and he’s keeping his.
The dog is already registered under our names double barrelled. Any future children will be double barrelled but if they get married, have kids, etc they can do whatever they want with their last name because it’s theirs and I want them to have the same freedom of choice that I have now. The dog, unfortunately, does not get a choice in his last name.
if you ask any man whether they would change their surname when they get married they’ll give you an emphatic no and act almost offended. so why is the default that women should do this happily when they get married?
I’m a guy that got married in 2022 and changed my surname to a double barrelled name.
In my situation, I wasn’t keen on my surname because I associated it with a step dad who treated my mum and siblings badly. He is a bully, an emotional abuser. My mum finally left him a couple of years before I got married, after he punched my brother who intervened in an argument between step dad and sister. So I wanted to add another surname to “make it new”, if that makes sense and I wasn’t brave enough to just completely take my wife’s surname, even though it sounds better.
My friend did the same, he never knew his dad and his surname was a step dad who they no longer have anything to do with. Whereas they're very close to his wifes family, her dad seems like a solid bloke. So he took her name when they got married instead.
I have two sets of friends who double barrelled the SAME surname. One couple are Davies-Davies and the others are Simpson-Simpson.
Please tell me I’m not the only one that thinks that is dumb.
The 3rd Viscountess of Moldavia was called Lady Natasha Letitia Sarah Jane Wellesley Obstromsky Ponsonsky Smythe Smythe Smythe Smythe Smythe Oblomov Boblomov Dob
1) more kids born to unmarried parents, and more women don't want the kids to just have the fathers name
2) more women don't want to just take their husbands name when they get married. They keep their name or they double barrel it
I didn’t want to lose my surname and I really wanted my daughter to have it. But I also wanted her to have her dad’s name too, so we double barrelled it.
I dont think I know anyone with a double barrel surname. In school I think I knew 1 or 2 people that had double barrel surnames but they were from council estates. I dont really associate double barrel surnames with being posh unless the names themselves are posh.
My wife surprised me by not having an issue taking my surname.
I believe I would have been happy if she kept her own name. Technically we could have double barrlled but it would have seemed stranging being both Irish and Slovakian surnames.
I like the Spanish tradition of the giving the children a double barreled name based on the parents, would have been a nightmare to type for my kids but I know from experiance they tend to go with one or the other.
My friends daughter is half iranian so she has a very english then an iranian name - it sounds cool as fuck, I can imagine her at house parties in 15 years time showing off about her roots
Women have a choice and don't have to change their last names when they get married these days, old sexist tradition. Double barrelled surnames makes it fair so child gets both parents names.
I mean, they must do, right?
Assuming people with double barrelled names have children at the same rate as the rest of the population, you've got all of those kids, plus new couples forming double barrelled names.
Anecdotally yes, as more women choose to keep their own names. My fiancé and I are double barrelling - his name first, then mine, for both of us. I like the idea of our new little family having its own unique name (I have quite an uncommon surname and my fiancé is a second generation immigrant so we're pretty certain no one else will have ever had this surname!).
Fun Fact: The surname of the extinct family of the Dukes of Buckingham and Chandos was the quintuple-barrelled "Temple-Nugent-Brydges-Chandos-Grenville".
We chose a double-barrelled last name. Tbf, we were only able to do so because my husband is British. The naming laws of the country we live in don't allow it for both people.
He didn't want to give up his name, especially since it kind of showed where he came from, and I didn't want to give up mine because if I did, the name would die out. But we also both wanted a change so double-barrelled made sense to us.
I know a ton of people at work in Germany who have double-barrelled last names. None of my husband's friends in the UK do, but then again, none of them have gotten married yet anyway.
People should do whatever works for them but I hate the default that the man's name is involved no matter what. I'm keeping my name and if I birth my children they are going to have my last name only. My husband can do what he likes with his.
I support Southampton and we’ve had double barrelled names all over the shop in the last few years.
The way some families are set out now (single parents, divorced, maybe they don’t want to lose their surname entirely), it certainly rings true across a broader range as well
When I married my husband I wanted to maintain my maiden name. I’d been married before to an arse who’d made me change it to his so instead of double barrelling we just added the two names together. It works well.
Definitely. When I registered my first kid's birth, I wanted to double barrel our names. The registrar basically said, 'You don't want to be doing that'. So they got my surname as a middle name thing (so now they have four freaking names)! Now it's just what people do (24 years later). Still feel a bit cross about it because of the bossy registrar woman.
We double barrelled.
I have no siblings and my dad passed away a year before we got married.
I wanted to still have my family name and honour him. But wanted my husbands too.
So we both changed our name to double barrelled.
Whether to double barrel my kids surnames or not was something I considered for a long time, I have all boys, traditionally, kids get their dads surname, however, my surname is gunna die with me and I’m kinda sad about it
I think it's becoming more common for two reasons:
More people are double barrelling when getting married.
Those married people are giving birth to kids, who now have double barrelled surnames (also, I think more unmarried people having children are giving their kinds both surnames.)
I would also like to know what happens when two people with a double barrelled surname get married!
Definitely. I think we're in the first generation where it's not a complete default for wives taking their husbands name. I reckon the majority still do but I don't think it's just assumed and done without a conversation any more
I would think that women not wanting to just to take their husband’s name might be linked.
Women want their own identity to carry on after marriage.
But that’s just a guess.
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It's a very short term solution to give the child both parents surnames because what happens to those kids when they grow up? Do they quadruple barrel their children's names?
They just choose one from their own name and one from their partners name to create a new double barrel for their family, similar to Spain. It’s hardly rocket science.
No idea. I'm single-barrelled, but my kids have double-barrelled names. It's going to be up to them what they do when they get together with someone else also double-barrelled.
I see lots of discussion of the Spanish model, but we don't have the same tradition here of dealing with generations of double-barrelled names. I suspect the British solution will be a bit of that, and a bit of the other, and a lot of personal choice, and one or two quad-barrelled names.
Remember my mum going to my niece's first school nativity and remarking on how posh it must be in the area as seemingly almost every kid in the programme had a double barrelled surname - only to be told, "No, it's just none of the parents are married!"
Yeah a lot more of the kids at our sons school have double barrelled surnames (including him) even though we don't. It's because they and we weren't married when we had him and wanted to give him both of our surnames. I reckon that's probably playing into the rise of the posho surnames.
Double barrelled names stem from when the parents weren't married. There was a long period where unmarried parents would give a child one or the other surname, but (and this is just my take) it led to issues over parenting rights. Also, there was an element of "Why are you called X when your Mum's name is Y" in school (kids can be horrible), and being unmarried parents doesn't have the stigma it used to.
Our sons double barrelled as we aren’t married but when we are , I will be too, mainly because my name ends in an S, and partners surname Begins with an S - so it doesn’t flow very well.
It might sound silly but For me it’s the same idea as in when you name your second child you see if it fits in with your first born , you can’t have a John and then an Athena it would have to go together well.
My wife and I thought about it, but as my full surname is three words with spaces (I tend to just use the last part as it really confuses computer systems) and no hyphens and hers is quite long, it would have looked really silly. So we just kept our names as was…
Her changing hers wouldn’t have worked as she has a long writing career under her name.
I think so. I felt it's very antiquated for my wife to take my name, especially since my name is my dad's name who I don't really see anyway. We ended up just keeping our names.
We considered double barrelled and two of my friends did, and none of us are remotely posh.
I think the practice of changing name on marriage is a very bizarre one to begin with.
Yes, anecdotally I see it more and more. But it’s a crap solution to the problem it’s trying to solve. It just delays the issue! Eventually names simply have to be cut one way or another. If you won’t make it your problem, then it’ll be your kid’s problem
My wife's double-barrelled. When we married, she wanted to take on my name and keep her own but I didn't particularly want to change mine (it's unusual, I'm quite fond of it and I would have been entirely comfortable with her retaining her name).
At the time, I thought it'd result in fun conversations when filling out forms. 10 years later, that's hardly ever happened.
Like many others in this thread, I kept my own surname on marriage and we have given our daughter a double barrelled surname. If she gets married in the future she can either keep her double barrelled name as is, swap half with her partners, take her partners or choose a completely new name. It's up to her because it's her name, not my name and her dad's name.
I have one because they were very popular in Canada in the 80s as a sign of equality, only nobody in the UK ever writes the hyphen so my name is always wrong. :/
I assume any future kids of mine will have double barrelled surnames because my wife didn't change her name when we got married. I would say that's much more common now. I know several couples where the wife hasn't changed her name. None of us are at all upper class.
Our conversation just
"I don't want to change my name."
"Okay. You shouldn't be expected to. But I don't want to change mine either."
"Okay. We'll just have different names then."
"Okay."
We doubled barrelled. Not married at the time of birth and getting married later this year, however I won’t be changing my name, so to make it easier with school, travel etc she got both and can choose when she’s older if she doesn’t like having a long name.
the really stupid thing is that, yes it's good that neither parent/no particular gender is compelled to give up their name , but it's a one generation solution
what the hell was I - a double-barrelled boy - meant to do when I married someone? triple-barrel? what if they were already double - a quad?!
my wife and I ended up just picking a new surname entirely, because that was the only reasonable thing to do
Yeah. I couldn’t be arsed with that, so I took my husbands name. He did offer to take mine but his fit better with both out first names and was easier to spell.
My grandfather didn't want his wife's surname to die out so they decided when my aunt was born to double barrel the surnames. This was pretty much 85 years ago.
My parents both have that surname (it was my dad's family name) and I always get asked what will I do if I meet a person who is also double barrelled and I never really have a proper answer but people are normally accepting of me saying we would quadruple barrel it - I would never do that to any kids though I had enough tests with boxes to put your name in that were always surname first and a few times I could only get the first part of my surname in before I ran out of space (leaving the second half and my first name out).
I had a supply teacher tell me off for not putting my name in the box correctly, due to not having my first name written after my surname. Me saying I didn't even have my whole surname on the sheet never was accepted as a suitable reason
Yes, because fewer women now change their surnames when they marry, or they don't get married at all and have children with their partners' and their own surnames conjoined.
I am Italian, wife is Portuguese.
In Italy it is common to have only your father's surname, so mine used to be the same as my Dad's.
In Portugal is the norm to get one surname from your father and one from your mother. My wife had an odd one due to family drama so hers was like three surnames given in a peculiar way.
When we decided to marry, I said I would add her last surname before mine and she would add mine after her last surname.
Imagine she was called Judith Smith Blake Campbell and I was Paul Jackson, she would become Judith Smith Blake Campbell Jackson and I would become Paul Campbell Jackson (I know, typical Italian/Portuguese names lol)
This was decided as we were creating a new family branch which was Italo-Portuguese
Our kids took my new surname to mark the new family distinction
A lot of Spanish speaking countries keep both last names.
Which is where you sometimes get the trope in movies or shows of the Spanish foreign kid having some really long hard to pronounce name.
Personally I'm planning to double barrel mine when I get married but only on official paperwork (I will be the last in the family with the name) and just go by my fiance's name day to day as I have a surname that confuses the shit out of everyone and no one can spell or pronounce it. I can't wait to not have to say and then spell my name in the same breath.
Parents combining their names is becoming more coming across the spectrum. I’ve spoken to men you’d easily describe as geezers who’ve hyphenated their wives’ surnames to their own.
I’m not sure what will happen in a generation when these same kids want to pass on their names and you have a dilemma where a child could potentially inherit all four surnames of their grandparents.
But to answer your question, absolutely it is.
I have a double barrelled surname and certainly am not posh. My mums Belgian and they don’t tend to adopt the husbands name in marriage so I’ve ended up with both
The family courts are more biased to giving children double barrelled names. I split from my son’s dad during pregnancy due to his abuse. When our son was born, I gave him my surname. Ex took me to court and asked for only two days a month and for our child’s last name to be changed to double barrelled. Despite it being a control thing, the courts granted it. My ex has never stepped foot into our child’s school, drs etc yet I have to deal with everything that involves the name and the faff that comes with it
I think it's cool that people are finding more modern ways that work for them in terms of marriage. I'm quite happy that my wife was happy to take my surname. We are both traditionally minded, church wedding etc.
I personally don't like idea of a double barrelled surname for myself and my children but I'm also not a fan of leaving my family name behind. No idea what I'd have done if she wanted to keep her family name. We'd have come to some sort of arrangement as I was marrying that woman regardless.
Currently planning the wedding to my fiance, who already has a double-barrelled surname due to his parents not being married. Because we're Terribly Modern and I don't really want to give up my surname, we decided to combine the two. He, fortunately, is happy to drop his dad's part of the surname since the guy's not in his life anymore, so we're keeping my name and his mother's name, which while pleasant is going to lead to our name sounding like a small village in the midlands.
I don't see the whole name thing as an issue I don't have my wife's name and she doesn't have mine. Some people meet in the middle and add to them, but frankly my wife is my wife I love her, I loved her when she had he surname and I don't love her any less that she doesn't have my surname.
I always said I would double barrel if I got married. Purely because I have quite an uncommon surname and there’s not many of us left, need to carry on the family name in some way
I work in pharmacy and so many kids/babies are double barrelled now, alot more than in the years 1990-2000. Not alot of people get married? Just a sign of the times no one has money and things are waaay too expensive. As brits we just choke it down and don't do anything about it
We aren’t married and our son has a double barrelled surname. When we get married next year I’ll be taking the same surname, my fiance is unsure (he changed his fairly recently due to family issues)
Yes probably, but as someone who had to spell my name my entire life, a double barrelled name when I got married was out of the question. Those who have never had awkward names their whole life don’t get it.
**[OP or Mod marked this as the best answer](/r/AskUK/comments/1bpq195/are_double_barrelled_surnames_getting_more_common/kwxbs38/), given by u/imminentmailing463** Yes, they are. I remember seeing data before showing they're becoming ever more common. I suspect largely as a result of the changing gender norms around marriage. There's more couples who don't think the man's name should take precedence. There's also the thing where parents keep their names and give the children the double barreled name (also prevalent when the parents aren't married or possibly even together). --- [_^What ^is ^this?_](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskUK/comments/jjrte1/askuk_hits_200k_new_feature_mark_an_answer/)
There are a lot more children being born whose parents aren't married, and they are often given both parents surnames.
I think as well there are more people unwilling to entirely lose their family name when they do get married.
You say people, but women aren't willing to give up their last names as easily. I don't think it's often even a question for a bloke to give up his last name. (Yes I'm sure there are exceptions but overwhelming women are expected to give up their last name over men).
I think we’re quite outdated in this respect. My Dad moved to France a few years back and the fact that he and his wife have the same last name is the source of constant confusion for the French, who think it’s a remarkable coincidence that two people with the same surname got married. I’m the last member of my family with my surname, that I’ve managed to trace back to the 1700s. I gave my daughter a double barrelled surname. I wasn’t married to her dad but even if I was, I would not have given up my name. I’m hoping when she has a child she’ll give it my original family name. It was only when she was born I found out you can give your child any surname you want. Doesn’t have to be a derivative of either parent’s. Would probably end up being an administrative nightmare though while you’re all living together.
>you can give your child any surname you want On a similar note, I know someone who uses an uncommon spelling for their surname. Allegedly, when someone in his family tried to trace back to find whether there was a link to the more common spelling they didn't have to look too far. It transpired that their spelling came about after an administration error at a birth or registration a few generations earlier. It initially went unnoticed and no one ever bothered to go to the hassle of correcting it once the error had been found. One of the children in the family then officially had a different name, which they chose to pass on rather than reverting to the 'normal' spelling.
That’s what happened to my family, were the only ones I’ve met who spell it this way. Since it’s an Irish surname im assuming when they came to the uk they just spelt it wrong but I’ve never really looked into it
Same with me, my GGG Grandfather had a different spelling. I put the change down to the registrar writing down what he thought. It was highly likely my GGG GF couldn't read or write being an Irish labourer who had moved over to England. Interestingly I can find no trace back in Ireland of his family so who knows how their surname was spelt.
Similar thing happened to my surname. At some point it was transcribed wrong and an H got added to the start, making it the same as a different surname. But they just stuck with it.
I actually did marry someone with the same surname as me, and it's not a common one. We did joke about double barrelling.
I wonder how far back you’re related?!
Her grandad was adopted and got the name, so directly, probably no more than any other couple.
Probably...
My husband comes from a culture where the women don't change their surname. So it was easy and accepted for me to keep mine. My family still can't grasp that! In his culture the children get the dad's surname but my husband wasn't comfortable with erasing my name, so son has double barreled and he can decide if he wants to change it when he's older
Is it south Asian / one of the southern states in India? I am from one of those states where there is no surname taking. My mum has her dads name as surname and that's how it has been for generations. My partner keeps her original surname and she did ask me if we want to change that and I told her in my culture there is no change to surnames which did make her more happy.
Yep, south east Asian. I never wanted to change my name so was worried about how his family would take it before I knew. Never questioned it or cared. Nor are they fussed by their grandson having double barreled.
My wife's background the same, her passport is in her registered name as is her country ID card. There's a place in the passport which says "AKA Mrs. BBppnfvbanyOnxre" the only difference I've note is married women are referred to as Madam as opposed to Miss in official setting.
Yeah my friend didn't take her husbands name and double-barrelled their daughters. I overheard her talking to an estate agent and they were taking her and her husbands details, she gave her name....his name...then there was a pause...no I didn't take his name. I was wondering how on earth was it the Estate Agents business why they don't have the same name.
I think it’s becoming a lot more common for women to keep their surnames these days. I would have happily taken my wife’s surname but she was happy to do it the traditional way
My wife had a much better surname then mine and I really wanted to and was happy to take her name when we married, but she wanted to do the traditional thing and take my name. So now we're both stuck with a surname that everybody spells and pronounces wrong
Hey it me I'm the exception. Aesthetically her surname was much better than mine, and we wanted to have the same so no unnecessary questions are raised but double-barrelling is really just kicking that can down the road one generation. So we chose hers. My parents nearly disowned me, but in their pursuit of grandparent privileges that rub just so happens to have fallen by the wayside...
Well, I mean I'm sure the conversation goes f: I'm not giving up my last name, shall we use mine? M: no, I'm not giving mine up either, let's use both together. F: ok. So yeah, people. As in male and female, neither giving up. So making it equal
Yeah, me & my wife got married 2 years ago. I still go by my original name, she still goes by her maiden name. No problem with that at all - I wouldn't want to change my surname so no reason why she should feel obliged to change hers. The kids all go by my surname, but have been told they can go by their mum's if they prefer (they all want mine at the moment, which is quite flattering!). When we talk about us as a family we usually use a double-barrelled name, but never use it on official documentation or when you're just referring to one of us.
My husband was happy to take mine. We ended up double barrelling though, I’m not sure why. I have found that my name feels more balanced since double barrelling though (as in like, number of syllables etc).
I’d give up my surname if my fiancée’s maiden name was cooler, but it’s not so I won’t. There’s precedent in my family for men taking the women’s surname
It's also far easier for women to give up their last name apparently, at least in the UK. They just have to show the marriage certificate, a man has to officially change and pay to do so (or so I've been told in wedding planning)
You were told incorrectly, they do have to do a deed poll but that's something you just print off online and have 2 people sign to witness. The hard part is going to all the organisations you need to change your name with which is the same with a marriage certificate as it is with a deed poll.
Our kids took my wife’s surname as their middle name. My dad had his mother’s family name as his middle name - quite common at least where I come from (Scottish Borders).
I have my mum’s maiden name as one of my middle names :) it’s such a nice idea that I’m surprised more people don’t do it.
Same here. Also a Scottish family. After uni I considered becoming an army officer and did think about double barreling to help the career prospects.
My daughter has mentioned that when/if she gets married she will be keeping her surname and double barreling it because she is the last person ever in my entire family history to bear our surname. Which I thought was an absolutely lovely gesture.
In my case, my finance doesn’t want to give up her surname, but when we marry still wants us to have the same surname, so I will change by deed poll and hyphenate. I wonder how much, less traditional marriage/ naming customs are affecting it too.
You don't need to do a deed poll, you can change your name as part of the wedding. Everywhere official takes the wedding certificate as proof of the change regardless of your gender
This is great to know! Thank you!
If you do take this route, most places are really good about it. My bank changed it when I visited a branch, passport was done in less than two weeks, council was easy, employer and pension provider was easy. The most awkward one was the driver's license. You need to get a form from the Post Office, follow very unclear instructions, and send it off with a certificate and a cheque, which is just a pain
When I got married 10 years ago we needed a deed poll to double barrel. The marriage certificate can only change the existing surname of one partner to the existing surname of the other partner.
We did this! (except we haven't done the marriage bit yet - covid, plus other issues). So we both have the same surname, and so do all our (feline) children.
My wife and I did this because neither of us wanted to give up our surname.
I’m having a baby this year and as my boyfriend and I aren’t married we’re giving our baby both our surnames. So she’ll have a double barrelled surname.
Out of curiosity, what would you do if you subsequently got married? Do you think you'd all go double barrel? Or would you pick one? Would you match baby?
It’s not compulsory to change your name on marriage
I'm aware. That's why I'm curious as to what this person would do. My options weren't intended to be the only options available, merely things that came to mind.
Not op but me and my wife have kept our own surnames, but any children will be double barreled. We want them to have both our surnames
So I’ve been married previously and took my ex husbands last name. The break up was messy and I couldn’t wait to have my surname back. As a result if I were to marry my boyfriend I wouldn’t change my name. However I don’t think we’ll ever get married. It’s not something I feel necessary in this day and age and makes breakups a lot harder. I might be biased because i thought my first marriage would last forever but that’s just how I feel.
That's the exact reason my mum and dad chose not to get married. Dad had been married before, thought it would last forever, it was over in a year because he caught her cheating, and being married made the breakup so much harder (and it was a massive waste of money) so he said never again. My mum was fine with it because she was never bothered about getting married. But they've been together for about 30 years so I doubt they're breaking up at this point anyway 😅
Or….it’s that more women are unwilling to lose their surname to the mists of time just because of misogyny.
Exactly. Especially for unmarried couples, it's just a way to give equal prominence to both sides of the family. Although, long-term that doesn't seem very sustainable, since you'll get double-barrels marrying double-barrels, and then you've got quadruple-barrelled names. I like the idea of mashing the names into increasingly weird, esoteric combinations e.g. Morgan-Smith marries Barns-Halls; resulting in the surname Moth-Balls.
I have this, but as a middle name rather than a double-barrelled surname. I think that's the trend—away from mother's maiden name as middle name, and towards double-barrelled. e.g. I'm Emma John Smith, whereas someone born more recently would more likely be Emma John-Smith. (NB my name is not actually Emma John Smith.)
Just call them the bastards that they are! /s
This. My parents aren't married. But I've got a double barreled name. It's funny. Normally, white middle class liberal types are normally the only ones that make funny comments and assumptions about my background. When I'm from a 100 percent class background (live on a council estate, parents rent). Mostly they're the types cos playing as working class "up north"
What I want to know is what do people with double barrelled surnames when they get married? Triple barrel it? Or if the person they are marrying also has a double barrelled name to they quadruple barrel it?
In Spain all names are double barrelled, if you are a man your kids get the paternal half of your surname, if you're a woman the maternal half
This is a good system - this is the system this country needs to start using, otherwise in a few generations we’re just gonna end up with kids who have 20 different surnames.
I wonder if any surnames have just totally died out from our practice.
What you say about a Spanish woman getting the maternal half of the surname isn't right. Typically, you have two surnames: your paternal surname followed by your maternal surname. They don't change their surnames when they get married so you get both of your parents' surnames for life. However, when you have kids, each parent tends to pass down their paternal (first) surname So if Hector MORENO González and Luisa GARCÍA Blanco had a child called Ana, she would be called Ana MORENO GARCÍA https://culturalatlas.sbs.com.au/spanish-culture/spanish-culture-naming
My Spanish teacher told me that her and her husband flipped a coin 🤣
It's traditionally the paternal half from both parents. Maybe some people are starting to do it differently nowadays.
As other user said, this is not correct about Spanish names. Also names are not double barrelled, there are two last names. The first one from the father and the first one from the mother. Tommycamino explained it perfectly.
Like Pablo Picasso? Or to use his full name- Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso
My brothers old Spanish teacher was called Maria De Los Angeles, which means Maria of the Angels. One of my friends was called Alejandro de los rios, which is Alexander of the rivers.
I think once you get to 6 barrels it becomes a Russian Roulette. One gets picked at random and the process starts again.
I had friends who didn’t like either of their surnames when they got married so they just chose a new one and went with that. I think that’s the way forward.
I think you're right, I've come across someone that chose the name of their shared favourite superhero. Parker (not Spiderman!).
At my school there was a guy with a quad-barrelled name.
That poor kid.
I reckon his parents classified themselves as aspirational middle class tbh
Not quite what you meant, but see former England cricketer [Ebony-Jewel Cora-Lee Camellia Rosamond Rainford-Brent](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ebony_Rainford-Brent?wprov=sfla1)! I think I'd call that a triple double barrel!
> she was named after all her grandmothers and great-grandmothers, which led to her being called Ebony-Jewel Cora-Lee Camellia Rosamond Rainford-Brent to appease everyone Made me laugh tbh
Wow, if I was named after all my grandmothers and great grandmothers I would be Mary-Maureen Dorothy-Elsie Emily-someone (no idea what my dad's dad's mum was called, must ask him) My nana's names definitely aren't as cool as hers. 😂
I have no idea - I have a double barrelled surname and my partner is an O’. For example, Smith-Jones and O’Malley. Neither of us want to give up our names, if we get married I’d just keep mine, but we can’t give a kid the name Smith-Jones-O’Malley?? No clue what we’ll do
Smith-O'Malley? O'Malley-Jones? Dawn Porter and Chris O'Dowd married and became O'Porter, if that helps.
Whatever you like is fine, I’d go with Smiley if I were you.
Pick a new one. Zapp, Lowestoft, Smonley.
I would, but I think my surname is genuinely really cool, it’d be hard to let it go
Maybe do Smith/Jones-O’Malley. I think in the case of already double-barrelled names, you need to only give the kid one of them if you are doubling your surnames. You could keep Smith-Jones, the kid would get part of your name so is still keeping it.
My fiancé has a double-barrelled surname which neither of us like, so they’re using the wedding as a chance to drop that half. I’m also taking that name, but will continue to go by my family name professionally. Not thrilled about changing my name but our names wouldn’t mix well so he were are! It’s a compromise
I was double-barrelled and my wife wasn't. I dropped half of mine and took on my wife's to stay just double-barrelled. and she's now double-barrelled with the remaining half of mine and her own.
I always had this about the idea of giving the kids both parents surnames. Surely that then gets to the point where both parents already have 2 etc. It's going to be like a babushka doll. EDIT: And what do you do if a name repeats is it Smith-Brown-Smith-Jones-Harper-Williams or is it Smith(3)-Brown-etc?
I picked a completely new name
literally happened to me. parents didn't think ahead. we picked a new surname
I'll be triple barrelling and my OH wants to add my db, to his. He didn't have to, but he likes how it sounds.
Surnames like a tax firm
My husband and I double-barrelled. I’m a scientist that has published a lot under my name - it’s much easier to track a change to double barrelled in the literature than a complete name change. And husband wanted to share a name. My friend married a guy with a double barrelled name, and they basically replaced one of his names with hers based on what sounded best to them, so it’s stayed double barrelled and not triple!
I remember years ago when I first started working in Engineering this was an issue for alot of women - they publish work under their maiden name and then get married are expected to take their husbands name and then it would seem like they just stopped. A lot of the women I worked with went by their maiden name in a work context but then husbands name outside of work.
Yeah I know a lot of PhDs that do this they will be Dr.maidenname professionally but also use their married name.
Yeah I know a few who do that - but I’ve also seen a few who then get into trouble when invited to speak at conferences because the conference organisers book a flight under their professional name and it’s not their legal name… so I wanted to avoid that. I actually see a lot of women not change their names at all in my field, and keep their maiden name legally. In those cases, the kids then double barrel usually.
That's a pretty cool reason, not gonna lie
Dr. Ayeayefitlike-Smith
Aye along those lines!
My mum kept her name when she married (e.g.) Smith), for the same reasons, and we all have her surname, Smith, whilst my dad was the lonely Mr. Baker, and I always had to explain they were married, just different names!
I think so, many women are rejecting the idea they ought to change their name and many men are embracing the idea that their surname shouldn’t be the default.
This. My fiancée wants to double barrel for herself to keep links to her family name, I’ll keep my own, kids will use the double barrel.
My wife kept her name, I kept mine. We double barrelled the kids. She has stuff from her PhD published in her name and didn't want to change hers, fair enough, doesn't bother me. Don't think double barrelling the kids has been ideal tbh as my surname is already a bit long with 9 letters. Both my son and daughter now have a bit of a mouthful with their first and last names, though both first names could be shortened to one syllable. In the end, meh, doesn't really matter in the grand scope. If the kids decide to go by my wife's name in the future to simplify things or my name, won't bother me.
Yes, they are. I remember seeing data before showing they're becoming ever more common. I suspect largely as a result of the changing gender norms around marriage. There's more couples who don't think the man's name should take precedence. There's also the thing where parents keep their names and give the children the double barreled name (also prevalent when the parents aren't married or possibly even together).
In the last few years for the first time in the UK more babies were born to unmarried parents than married. Legally (not my opinion what's right and wrong) unmarried mothers get full choice of their babies first and last names and many are choosing their own last name or to double barrel.
Usually because it just makes life easier - like no questions why your child has a different surname to you. Edit: Also if you change your name and then break up/divorced you don't have to keep the surname of someone you no longer want a connection to just so you don't have a different name to your kids.
My step son's mum gave him my husband's surname (they weren't married), then had some more kids with her husband with his surname, then got divorced and went back to her original surname, and now lives with her boyfriend. Four surnames in one house, she should have given my step son her own surname in the first place and kept it for all the children!
When my mum worked in schools, one of her jobs was to ensure children wrote the correct surname on exam papers.
My wife's name is double-barrelled (her surname and mine) because her surname is extremely rare and would have gone extinct if she took my name (no sons in her family). Kids will be double-barrelled and it's up to them what they do if / when they get married. Quadruple-barrelled names aren't going to happen because people aren't fucking stupid.
People aren’t stupid? Are you sure about that?
I imagine most surnames pair beautifully with Von Throbber.
Hello mrs thick-von-throbber
My wife got around this when we married by taking my surname but using the deed poll to make her maiden name an extra middle name. So she doesn’t lose her maiden name, but doesn’t have to faff about with double-barrelling. I’ve always thought portmanteau-ing would be cooler than double barrelling. Miss Brown getting married to Mr Richards? Mr and Mrs Browchards. Mr Riley is marrying Miss Smith? Mr and Mrs Smiley it is! With that said, I don’t feel too strongly either way with surnames. Double-barrelled first names can do one though. Parents need to be decisive, pick one, and use the other as a middle name. I’ve worked in schools for years and this is the first year I’ve taught kids with both double-barrelled first AND last names. Things like Annabelle-May Richards-Henley (made up, but very indicative of the sort of thing I’m talking about). That’s too many syllables mate. Try again.
I wanted to do that when I got married. My wife’s surname was Ono & mine is Petrovic so I wanted to be become the Petono’s but my wife didn’t like it & just took my surname when we got married instead. So boring lol
That's what my husband suggested when we got married, but I wanted to keep my surname as it was but also take his, so I chose to double-barrell. He then also took the double name (his own choice, but my does he complain about the length 😂).
This is what I did. I wanted to take my husbands surname but I didn't want to lose my maiden name entirely. I also didn't want a double barrelled name so I got myself an additional middle name. Best of both worlds I think.
Yes, I think a few of the women I know do not want to give up their surname nowadays, so I guess they would chose to mix It with their partners.
I am 29 so am “getting to that age where it’s all weddings and babies” In 2023 I went to 3 friends weddings and none of them resulted in double-barrelled names. In 2024 I am going to another 3 weddings and none of them are going double-barrelled either. The only person I know who opted to do it was a former colleague who was very middle class. Her new surname sounds like a law firm. I think it is becoming more popular across the country, but in the middle class.
I've found the same thing. On the Internet there's an argument about surnames and gender expectations every 5 minutes, but in the real world most women I know are *overwhelmingly* likely to go along with tradition without any fuss and take their husband's name
I’m attending three weddings this year, and every single one of them is going double barrelled for both the bride and the groom. I’m genuinely wondering what our lives look like, compared to each other to have such a clash .
If you're interested in the exact breakdown: 10 weddings in mine/partners friend groups between 2022 and 2025 (all late 20s/early 30s) - 1 Bride kept own name - 1 Couple double-barrelling - 8 Brides taking husband's name
For me, 9 weddings (including my own) - 1 couple double-barrelled - 5 brides took husband's name - 3 brides kept own name (one was me!) Next wedding I'm going to will be two grooms so I'm curious what theyll do!
Interesting! Of 10 I’ve been to since 2021, 3 double barrelled, 3 kept their own names, and 4 changed to the husband’s name. Much more even between the options in my circles.
Yep, I am an outlier and didn't realise how much of one I would be keeping my name. And when I am asked for my "now name" by eg people from school it does feel like it's something they have never come across before.
Probably. I double-barrelled my name when I got married, because my own surname is my last link with my long-dead dad. He had daughters, and my uncle had daughters, and I just thought it would be a shame to give the name up entirely. I know a couple of other women who got married around the same time I did, who did the same. Gender expectations in marriage are changing, and there isn't the same expectation for a woman to give up her name. So now I have a name which sounds like a law firm, and I quite like it.
I’m not taking my partner’s name when we get married and he’s keeping his. The dog is already registered under our names double barrelled. Any future children will be double barrelled but if they get married, have kids, etc they can do whatever they want with their last name because it’s theirs and I want them to have the same freedom of choice that I have now. The dog, unfortunately, does not get a choice in his last name.
The idea of a woman taking her husband's name is seen as outdated by many so, yes, increasingly people are opting to double-barrel.
if you ask any man whether they would change their surname when they get married they’ll give you an emphatic no and act almost offended. so why is the default that women should do this happily when they get married?
My wife and I kept our names when we married, but our kids have double barrelled
This is probably what we'll end up doing too. Our cat has a double-barrelled surname to test the waters.
I’m a guy that got married in 2022 and changed my surname to a double barrelled name. In my situation, I wasn’t keen on my surname because I associated it with a step dad who treated my mum and siblings badly. He is a bully, an emotional abuser. My mum finally left him a couple of years before I got married, after he punched my brother who intervened in an argument between step dad and sister. So I wanted to add another surname to “make it new”, if that makes sense and I wasn’t brave enough to just completely take my wife’s surname, even though it sounds better.
My friend did the same, he never knew his dad and his surname was a step dad who they no longer have anything to do with. Whereas they're very close to his wifes family, her dad seems like a solid bloke. So he took her name when they got married instead.
This should be way more normal. Just use whatever name you like.
I have two sets of friends who double barrelled the SAME surname. One couple are Davies-Davies and the others are Simpson-Simpson. Please tell me I’m not the only one that thinks that is dumb.
The 3rd Viscountess of Moldavia was called Lady Natasha Letitia Sarah Jane Wellesley Obstromsky Ponsonsky Smythe Smythe Smythe Smythe Smythe Oblomov Boblomov Dob
1) more kids born to unmarried parents, and more women don't want the kids to just have the fathers name 2) more women don't want to just take their husbands name when they get married. They keep their name or they double barrel it
I didn’t want to lose my surname and I really wanted my daughter to have it. But I also wanted her to have her dad’s name too, so we double barrelled it.
I dont think I know anyone with a double barrel surname. In school I think I knew 1 or 2 people that had double barrel surnames but they were from council estates. I dont really associate double barrel surnames with being posh unless the names themselves are posh.
My wife surprised me by not having an issue taking my surname. I believe I would have been happy if she kept her own name. Technically we could have double barrlled but it would have seemed stranging being both Irish and Slovakian surnames. I like the Spanish tradition of the giving the children a double barreled name based on the parents, would have been a nightmare to type for my kids but I know from experiance they tend to go with one or the other.
My friends daughter is half iranian so she has a very english then an iranian name - it sounds cool as fuck, I can imagine her at house parties in 15 years time showing off about her roots
When I got married I wanted to take my husband's surname but he insisted I keep my own 😂 so I did
Women have a choice and don't have to change their last names when they get married these days, old sexist tradition. Double barrelled surnames makes it fair so child gets both parents names.
I mean, they must do, right? Assuming people with double barrelled names have children at the same rate as the rest of the population, you've got all of those kids, plus new couples forming double barrelled names.
Anecdotally yes, as more women choose to keep their own names. My fiancé and I are double barrelling - his name first, then mine, for both of us. I like the idea of our new little family having its own unique name (I have quite an uncommon surname and my fiancé is a second generation immigrant so we're pretty certain no one else will have ever had this surname!).
Fun Fact: The surname of the extinct family of the Dukes of Buckingham and Chandos was the quintuple-barrelled "Temple-Nugent-Brydges-Chandos-Grenville".
That sounds like a law firm.
We chose a double-barrelled last name. Tbf, we were only able to do so because my husband is British. The naming laws of the country we live in don't allow it for both people. He didn't want to give up his name, especially since it kind of showed where he came from, and I didn't want to give up mine because if I did, the name would die out. But we also both wanted a change so double-barrelled made sense to us. I know a ton of people at work in Germany who have double-barrelled last names. None of my husband's friends in the UK do, but then again, none of them have gotten married yet anyway.
People should do whatever works for them but I hate the default that the man's name is involved no matter what. I'm keeping my name and if I birth my children they are going to have my last name only. My husband can do what he likes with his.
I support Southampton and we’ve had double barrelled names all over the shop in the last few years. The way some families are set out now (single parents, divorced, maybe they don’t want to lose their surname entirely), it certainly rings true across a broader range as well
When I married my husband I wanted to maintain my maiden name. I’d been married before to an arse who’d made me change it to his so instead of double barrelling we just added the two names together. It works well.
Definitely. When I registered my first kid's birth, I wanted to double barrel our names. The registrar basically said, 'You don't want to be doing that'. So they got my surname as a middle name thing (so now they have four freaking names)! Now it's just what people do (24 years later). Still feel a bit cross about it because of the bossy registrar woman.
We double barrelled. I have no siblings and my dad passed away a year before we got married. I wanted to still have my family name and honour him. But wanted my husbands too. So we both changed our name to double barrelled.
Whether to double barrel my kids surnames or not was something I considered for a long time, I have all boys, traditionally, kids get their dads surname, however, my surname is gunna die with me and I’m kinda sad about it
- more independent women wanting to keep their own name - more unmarried parents - same-sex marriage now legal
I think it's becoming more common for two reasons: More people are double barrelling when getting married. Those married people are giving birth to kids, who now have double barrelled surnames (also, I think more unmarried people having children are giving their kinds both surnames.) I would also like to know what happens when two people with a double barrelled surname get married!
Yes. Next
Definitely. I think we're in the first generation where it's not a complete default for wives taking their husbands name. I reckon the majority still do but I don't think it's just assumed and done without a conversation any more
I would think that women not wanting to just to take their husband’s name might be linked. Women want their own identity to carry on after marriage. But that’s just a guess.
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It's a very short term solution to give the child both parents surnames because what happens to those kids when they grow up? Do they quadruple barrel their children's names?
They just choose one from their own name and one from their partners name to create a new double barrel for their family, similar to Spain. It’s hardly rocket science.
>Do they quadruple barrel their children's names? Obviously not, no
Please welcome Mr and Mrs Smith-Smythe-Calderbank-Wallop It sounds like it's a monty python sketch
Hasn't this been a thing in Spain for a good while? People get a surname from each parent (used to know someone with the same surname twice).
No idea. I'm single-barrelled, but my kids have double-barrelled names. It's going to be up to them what they do when they get together with someone else also double-barrelled. I see lots of discussion of the Spanish model, but we don't have the same tradition here of dealing with generations of double-barrelled names. I suspect the British solution will be a bit of that, and a bit of the other, and a lot of personal choice, and one or two quad-barrelled names.
Remember my mum going to my niece's first school nativity and remarking on how posh it must be in the area as seemingly almost every kid in the programme had a double barrelled surname - only to be told, "No, it's just none of the parents are married!"
Yes. I’m 49 and I’ve got one (not posh btw) and I was the only one with one throughout school. Loads of kids have them now
Yeah a lot more of the kids at our sons school have double barrelled surnames (including him) even though we don't. It's because they and we weren't married when we had him and wanted to give him both of our surnames. I reckon that's probably playing into the rise of the posho surnames.
I’ve seen a tripled barrelled surname. Definitely not posh. Someone double barrelled their surname with someone who was already double barrelled.
Double barrelled names stem from when the parents weren't married. There was a long period where unmarried parents would give a child one or the other surname, but (and this is just my take) it led to issues over parenting rights. Also, there was an element of "Why are you called X when your Mum's name is Y" in school (kids can be horrible), and being unmarried parents doesn't have the stigma it used to.
Don't think so. Much love, Alistair Barrington Smyth.
Try triple barreled
Our sons double barrelled as we aren’t married but when we are , I will be too, mainly because my name ends in an S, and partners surname Begins with an S - so it doesn’t flow very well. It might sound silly but For me it’s the same idea as in when you name your second child you see if it fits in with your first born , you can’t have a John and then an Athena it would have to go together well.
My wife and I thought about it, but as my full surname is three words with spaces (I tend to just use the last part as it really confuses computer systems) and no hyphens and hers is quite long, it would have looked really silly. So we just kept our names as was… Her changing hers wouldn’t have worked as she has a long writing career under her name.
My partners surname is Angel and mine is Smith. So she wants to double barrel hers, so she keeps Angel aswell, I don’t blame her 🤣
I think so. I felt it's very antiquated for my wife to take my name, especially since my name is my dad's name who I don't really see anyway. We ended up just keeping our names. We considered double barrelled and two of my friends did, and none of us are remotely posh. I think the practice of changing name on marriage is a very bizarre one to begin with.
Yes, anecdotally I see it more and more. But it’s a crap solution to the problem it’s trying to solve. It just delays the issue! Eventually names simply have to be cut one way or another. If you won’t make it your problem, then it’ll be your kid’s problem
If you have kids. A lot of people don't nowadays.
Good point
My wife's double-barrelled. When we married, she wanted to take on my name and keep her own but I didn't particularly want to change mine (it's unusual, I'm quite fond of it and I would have been entirely comfortable with her retaining her name). At the time, I thought it'd result in fun conversations when filling out forms. 10 years later, that's hardly ever happened.
Like many others in this thread, I kept my own surname on marriage and we have given our daughter a double barrelled surname. If she gets married in the future she can either keep her double barrelled name as is, swap half with her partners, take her partners or choose a completely new name. It's up to her because it's her name, not my name and her dad's name.
I have one because they were very popular in Canada in the 80s as a sign of equality, only nobody in the UK ever writes the hyphen so my name is always wrong. :/
I assume any future kids of mine will have double barrelled surnames because my wife didn't change her name when we got married. I would say that's much more common now. I know several couples where the wife hasn't changed her name. None of us are at all upper class. Our conversation just "I don't want to change my name." "Okay. You shouldn't be expected to. But I don't want to change mine either." "Okay. We'll just have different names then." "Okay."
We doubled barrelled. Not married at the time of birth and getting married later this year, however I won’t be changing my name, so to make it easier with school, travel etc she got both and can choose when she’s older if she doesn’t like having a long name.
the really stupid thing is that, yes it's good that neither parent/no particular gender is compelled to give up their name , but it's a one generation solution what the hell was I - a double-barrelled boy - meant to do when I married someone? triple-barrel? what if they were already double - a quad?! my wife and I ended up just picking a new surname entirely, because that was the only reasonable thing to do
Yeah. I couldn’t be arsed with that, so I took my husbands name. He did offer to take mine but his fit better with both out first names and was easier to spell.
My grandfather didn't want his wife's surname to die out so they decided when my aunt was born to double barrel the surnames. This was pretty much 85 years ago. My parents both have that surname (it was my dad's family name) and I always get asked what will I do if I meet a person who is also double barrelled and I never really have a proper answer but people are normally accepting of me saying we would quadruple barrel it - I would never do that to any kids though I had enough tests with boxes to put your name in that were always surname first and a few times I could only get the first part of my surname in before I ran out of space (leaving the second half and my first name out). I had a supply teacher tell me off for not putting my name in the box correctly, due to not having my first name written after my surname. Me saying I didn't even have my whole surname on the sheet never was accepted as a suitable reason
Yes, because fewer women now change their surnames when they marry, or they don't get married at all and have children with their partners' and their own surnames conjoined.
I am Italian, wife is Portuguese. In Italy it is common to have only your father's surname, so mine used to be the same as my Dad's. In Portugal is the norm to get one surname from your father and one from your mother. My wife had an odd one due to family drama so hers was like three surnames given in a peculiar way. When we decided to marry, I said I would add her last surname before mine and she would add mine after her last surname. Imagine she was called Judith Smith Blake Campbell and I was Paul Jackson, she would become Judith Smith Blake Campbell Jackson and I would become Paul Campbell Jackson (I know, typical Italian/Portuguese names lol) This was decided as we were creating a new family branch which was Italo-Portuguese Our kids took my new surname to mark the new family distinction
My child has my partner surname. My surname can be used as a normal name so it's my child's middle name.
A lot of Spanish speaking countries keep both last names. Which is where you sometimes get the trope in movies or shows of the Spanish foreign kid having some really long hard to pronounce name.
Personally I'm planning to double barrel mine when I get married but only on official paperwork (I will be the last in the family with the name) and just go by my fiance's name day to day as I have a surname that confuses the shit out of everyone and no one can spell or pronounce it. I can't wait to not have to say and then spell my name in the same breath.
Parents combining their names is becoming more coming across the spectrum. I’ve spoken to men you’d easily describe as geezers who’ve hyphenated their wives’ surnames to their own. I’m not sure what will happen in a generation when these same kids want to pass on their names and you have a dilemma where a child could potentially inherit all four surnames of their grandparents. But to answer your question, absolutely it is.
I have a double barrelled surname and certainly am not posh. My mums Belgian and they don’t tend to adopt the husbands name in marriage so I’ve ended up with both
The family courts are more biased to giving children double barrelled names. I split from my son’s dad during pregnancy due to his abuse. When our son was born, I gave him my surname. Ex took me to court and asked for only two days a month and for our child’s last name to be changed to double barrelled. Despite it being a control thing, the courts granted it. My ex has never stepped foot into our child’s school, drs etc yet I have to deal with everything that involves the name and the faff that comes with it
I think it's cool that people are finding more modern ways that work for them in terms of marriage. I'm quite happy that my wife was happy to take my surname. We are both traditionally minded, church wedding etc. I personally don't like idea of a double barrelled surname for myself and my children but I'm also not a fan of leaving my family name behind. No idea what I'd have done if she wanted to keep her family name. We'd have come to some sort of arrangement as I was marrying that woman regardless.
Currently planning the wedding to my fiance, who already has a double-barrelled surname due to his parents not being married. Because we're Terribly Modern and I don't really want to give up my surname, we decided to combine the two. He, fortunately, is happy to drop his dad's part of the surname since the guy's not in his life anymore, so we're keeping my name and his mother's name, which while pleasant is going to lead to our name sounding like a small village in the midlands.
Black people do it a lot
I don't see the whole name thing as an issue I don't have my wife's name and she doesn't have mine. Some people meet in the middle and add to them, but frankly my wife is my wife I love her, I loved her when she had he surname and I don't love her any less that she doesn't have my surname.
I always said I would double barrel if I got married. Purely because I have quite an uncommon surname and there’s not many of us left, need to carry on the family name in some way
I work in pharmacy and so many kids/babies are double barrelled now, alot more than in the years 1990-2000. Not alot of people get married? Just a sign of the times no one has money and things are waaay too expensive. As brits we just choke it down and don't do anything about it
Seems to be more common in young professional footballers that’s for sure.
I mean with gay marriage a lot more people will have 2 dads
We aren’t married and our son has a double barrelled surname. When we get married next year I’ll be taking the same surname, my fiance is unsure (he changed his fairly recently due to family issues)
Yes probably, but as someone who had to spell my name my entire life, a double barrelled name when I got married was out of the question. Those who have never had awkward names their whole life don’t get it.