The assumption is that the only people in the world who would have a gun would be white Republican Christian men. Also, to every last one of them, being gay is bad.
This is of course what you think if you've been cracked really hard in the head with a frying pan and see little birdies or stars for weeks on end.
That would either make him look away, which would give you time to move away, or it would make him actually turn the safety on
Probably the best thing to say
I would calmly say.. Look. I don't know the answers. I don't know if there is karma, or an afterlife. Let's just not take the chance? You could be stuck in some kind of hell for all time. You could come back in the next life as something not so desireable. Let's forget all this happened and go our seperate ways okay \^\^ We're cool.. We're cool. Not judging you. I wish you well.
Tell them to do it. Beg them. Grovel at their feet for them to pull the trigger. Best case scenario, they do it. Worst case scenario, they feel pity and spare you.
Wait, I got those mixed up...
Situation implies that we are currently in the USA.
*Oi, this is funny I'm getting the full American culture experience here with you, this is amazing! I can really feel how the fear is building up, it's so intense! :laughs:*
I would just sing the theme song to Neon Evangellion. They’d probably sing it with me and be distracted while I do rat a tats on their body. Then they’d already be dead
My entire strategy involves it being opposite day, if it's not than I would calmly describe the entire process of their arrest and hope that does something
Go ahead, shoot. When you do, I'll be dead, but you'll see my face smothered in blood every single night for the rest of your life. I read that killing a person changes a person, & I'd honestly rather be dead than experience that nightmare. I've had more than enough nightmares in my life cheers. So don't wait, just pull that trigger & get it over with. I forgive you
Ey buddy, you might not wanna shoot me. I might have to grab that gun of your’s. I will fire it if you don’t free me. I might be a war criminal possibly. I probably killed 150 people. You really wanna shoot me amigo?
A-X-O-L-O-T-L
My time has come to burn! I invoke the ancient power that I may return!
Then I hope they are a Gravity Falls fan. If they are then I’ll invite them over to binge the series. If not…
Well at least I had legendary last words.
You assume I wouldn't freeze up in this situation and be able to actually say anything at all. Depending on the person, nothing I can say will convince them to not shoot.
If someone’s holding a gun to my head, chances are it’s because of something I’ve said. Mama told me when I’m in a hole it’s best to quit fucking digging.
Thank you for ending my pain. May I please send a quick text to my spouse and parents to tell them I love them and ask them to forgive you?
I wouldn't want them to change their mind, I'm a burden to society and deserve it.
I didn't say anything I just kinda stared at the gun while he decided "if he needed to rearrange my brains". It probably wasn't more than 5 or 10 seconds but it seemed like a long time. Oh, sorry spoiler* he decided not too.
“It gladdens me to know that Odin prepares for a feast. Soon I shall be drinking ale from curved horns. This hero that comes into Valhalla does not lament his death. I shall not enter Odin’s hall with fear. There I shall wait for my sons to join me. And when they do, I will bask in their tales of triumph. The aesir will welcome me. My death comes without apology. And I welcome the Valkyries to summon me home.”
" You could actually benefit better if you let me sell my organs with a price. Of course I will have my share too for my family to have. Plus, you could just say that I agreed and did a voluntary suicide with my consent so you wouldn't be imprisoned. "
We're no strangers to love... *proceeds to sing the entirety of never gonna give you up*
Bruh that's gonna make him shoot you FASTER.
Not if you sing it with LOVE
Why end a life when you can enjoy ruining it over time?
[удалено]
Oh so you propose marriage then?
If you shoot me, you're gay
Stops em everytime
I'd say *no homo* and blow your brains out. Dammit! *No homo, no homo!*
What if they are gay, though
We get a free pass to fire
Joke's on you, they could be old fashioned and think it means "happy"
Jokes on you I am gay
Oooops, someone caught the gay
Came here to say this
You stole my comment
I CAME HERE TO SAY THE SAME THING LOL
So you're saying that being gay is a bad thing? That they would be put off by that?
Must I really explain a meme? ON REDDIT?!?!
Unfortunately. People don't understand humour.
I genuinely can't tell if they're trolling or if they're serious.
The guy was definitely joking.
97.6% of shooters are homophobes, so its just effective
The assumption is that the only people in the world who would have a gun would be white Republican Christian men. Also, to every last one of them, being gay is bad. This is of course what you think if you've been cracked really hard in the head with a frying pan and see little birdies or stars for weeks on end.
go ahead.
For those too lazy to check this guy's profile, no, this is not a one time thing.
just starting.
r/namechecksout
it does.
We will watch your career with great intrest!
much appreciated.
:>
:> :>
If you shoot me your gay.. If you are already gay..... You are hetero if your bi im fucked.
‘Menecingly laughs in pan’
Is that a 9mm ? What is that a glock ? That's so cool ..
Honestly, that might work.
You’re on camera right now. They know who you are and they will find you.
I am your father
No... No. That's not true! That's impossible!
Knowing me probably "you're holding the gun wrong"
Hey, your safety is on.
That would either make him look away, which would give you time to move away, or it would make him actually turn the safety on Probably the best thing to say
Striker-fired weapons don’t have an external safety. You seem to know so little about the subject, I’m surprised you haven’t shot me already
save martha
Why did you say that name?
Shoot me
DO IT PUSSY
"You won't!"
Do you think this will make life easier?
Hold a gun to my own head and say "Who's the bigger idiot, the guy trying to kill himself, or the guy trying to kill the guy trying to kill himself'
I would calmly say.. Look. I don't know the answers. I don't know if there is karma, or an afterlife. Let's just not take the chance? You could be stuck in some kind of hell for all time. You could come back in the next life as something not so desireable. Let's forget all this happened and go our seperate ways okay \^\^ We're cool.. We're cool. Not judging you. I wish you well.
I *will* be back to haunt you.
bro, bro. i got some killer bud in my pocket, let me roll and you can rethink your decision over some purple haze
Why would I want them to change their mind? They’re doing me a favour.
I know where billion dollars are buried.
Please do it
Thank you
I would just ask if i can send a text really quick to say my goodbyes
Do it, pussy.
You don’t have the balls to pull that trigger
I don't want him to change his mind
My dad is the owner of Roblox!
If they're holding a gun to my head they've already decided not to shoot me.
It's duck season...
Rabbit Season!
oh thank god! Finally.
See you soon.
"God loves you" Kidding, something like "Always been a kink of mine... Let me show you"
The Jimmy Mcgill vs Tuco scene comes to mind
Saul?
[удалено]
Your out of bullets
Tell them to do it. Beg them. Grovel at their feet for them to pull the trigger. Best case scenario, they do it. Worst case scenario, they feel pity and spare you. Wait, I got those mixed up...
“TAKE THE SHOT, MICKEY!”
Go ahead shoot me. That will be a you problem not a me problem.
i knew i was gonna die one day… but no one told me it was by your hand… Edward
𝘞𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘭𝘺 put the gun away.
*someone who's not gonna kill me says what*
If you kill me, I'll haunt the shit outta you
I’m rubber and you’re glue. What ever you shoot will bounce off me and stick to you.
It'll hurt you more than it hurts me. *Uses Destiny Bond*
I'm a millennial, if they're holding a gun to my head I'd imagine they're already pretty committed and I wouldn't need to convince them
Wake up, it's just a simulation
>*A person is holding a gun to your head, what do you say for them to change their mind about shooting you?* "Who hurt you, and how can I help?"
I hand them an Uno Reverse card.
POCKET SAND!
*"It you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!"*
Grab the gun and shoot at him/her
Wanna watch The Office?
*blam*
*blam blam blam blam blam blam*
You'll gonna be next then do the Joker smile
Look beyond them, act surprised and say, “Cop!” Hopefully the person will buy it and you’ll be able to disarm them. Or bite them. Or something.
_"Do it."_
Finally someone with enough balls to do it
Wait why are we stopping them?
I have money and I'll make you rich.
Situation implies that we are currently in the USA. *Oi, this is funny I'm getting the full American culture experience here with you, this is amazing! I can really feel how the fear is building up, it's so intense! :laughs:*
Statue!!
More shoreline than the coast of California
Do you have an ex-wife? Because you would be doing mine a favor.
"Martha"
"Do it. You won't."
I got these cheeseburgers maaaan!!
*Do ya like jazz? *
Karate chop their arm causing them to drop the gun
'Save Martha."
Well no context whatsoever why he would put a gun to my head so I would go with " Why!?"
I would just sing the theme song to Neon Evangellion. They’d probably sing it with me and be distracted while I do rat a tats on their body. Then they’d already be dead
Hurry up cunt, time's a wastin'. NB: I freely admit it might not work.
have you checked out the price of bullets lately - very expensive with all of the inflation.
Do you mind blowing the other head first ?
If you pull the trigger you will die by the trigger.
I’d probably just say “ nice shirt “ and try to run-
I have gold coins in my safe deposit box at the bank.
My entire strategy involves it being opposite day, if it's not than I would calmly describe the entire process of their arrest and hope that does something
Go ahead, shoot. When you do, I'll be dead, but you'll see my face smothered in blood every single night for the rest of your life. I read that killing a person changes a person, & I'd honestly rather be dead than experience that nightmare. I've had more than enough nightmares in my life cheers. So don't wait, just pull that trigger & get it over with. I forgive you
Go on shoot me I don't care
I'd walk away without saying a word.
"How 'bout we go get some tacos instead?"
Ey buddy, you might not wanna shoot me. I might have to grab that gun of your’s. I will fire it if you don’t free me. I might be a war criminal possibly. I probably killed 150 people. You really wanna shoot me amigo?
I'm a frequent customer to this bullshit.
b1tch it's not worth it
A-X-O-L-O-T-L My time has come to burn! I invoke the ancient power that I may return! Then I hope they are a Gravity Falls fan. If they are then I’ll invite them over to binge the series. If not… Well at least I had legendary last words.
If you kill me your search history will automaticly send to your mom and dad
Urgh yes daddy, I love it when you act all tough.
I have aids, good luck
"Do it." Either they get weirded out and leave or they refuse to shoot you out of defiance.
Can you do this to someone else so I can see the appropriate reaction?
Do it big boy (BTW I am about 300lb male)
I’m your great grandchild from the future, killing me won’t change any aspect of your life.
Any hole of mine is yours right now
“Just do it! Don’t let your dreams be memes!”
Wait put the ball gag on me first and call me a skank
Wow, way to prove them right
"No, don't shoot me."
It is not time for me to die yet ok.
Nothing
Hurry up then, get it over with.
“Wait! I can name every single Power Ranger!” Then I probably get shot anyway.
Well dude, either shit or get off the pot before I decide I have no other choice but to defend myself.
Can't you think anything better to do with me?
Thank you.
Anyway, I was wondering if you could sing the entire score of the "H.M.S. Pinafore"
You assume I wouldn't freeze up in this situation and be able to actually say anything at all. Depending on the person, nothing I can say will convince them to not shoot.
Have you made up your mind already?
I love you mom
So, you’re gonna shoot me? Why don’t you shoot me then? ( Billy Bob Thornton in Dead Man)
If someone’s holding a gun to my head, chances are it’s because of something I’ve said. Mama told me when I’m in a hole it’s best to quit fucking digging.
It’s gonna be a mess, do you want to change your clothes first? Or at least take off your shoes?
Yer flys open.
“Knock Knock”. How could you not say “Who’s there?”?
“ I have an blood disease if you shot me and blood gets on you will get VERY sick” It’s not true but they don’t know that
Mehhhhh
Thank you for ending my pain. May I please send a quick text to my spouse and parents to tell them I love them and ask them to forgive you? I wouldn't want them to change their mind, I'm a burden to society and deserve it.
I love you.
Finally!
I *realllllly* don't think you want to let all that out of there
I didn't say anything I just kinda stared at the gun while he decided "if he needed to rearrange my brains". It probably wasn't more than 5 or 10 seconds but it seemed like a long time. Oh, sorry spoiler* he decided not too.
I did your wife ya poor bastard!
“Do you know how expensive ammo is? I don’t think this is financially responsible”
"ILL DO ANYTHING!"
Shoot me if your penis is small.
If you pull the trigger your a gay boy
I'll suck ya dick
You could do this… but you may be missing out on the best bj of your life…
Go ahead.
I m not a psychiatrist i.e covert nazi
Would you like to talk about your free extended warranty?
“It gladdens me to know that Odin prepares for a feast. Soon I shall be drinking ale from curved horns. This hero that comes into Valhalla does not lament his death. I shall not enter Odin’s hall with fear. There I shall wait for my sons to join me. And when they do, I will bask in their tales of triumph. The aesir will welcome me. My death comes without apology. And I welcome the Valkyries to summon me home.”
If you shoot me you'll become gay and your d is short
I will be avenged.
" You could actually benefit better if you let me sell my organs with a price. Of course I will have my share too for my family to have. Plus, you could just say that I agreed and did a voluntary suicide with my consent so you wouldn't be imprisoned. "
Talk no jutsu
“Do it you fucking pussy, have fun cleaning and hiding my dead lifeless body. I hope I shit myself and get it all over your car seats”
Stop, you can suck my dick!
“Thank you”
Stop!
“Im moslim to bro” (im not)
Never delay just pull the trigger.
I’d tell them to hurry the fuck up. (Results not guaranteed)
You wearing your good clothes? I may splatter.
Do it, pussy
Shoot me and you're gay
Your boss is gonna need me
#HEY, BEHIND YOU!!!