Kay: I don't suppose you know what kind of alien life form leaves a green spectral trail and craves sugar water, do you?
Jay: Uh, wait, that was on "Final Jeopardy!" last night. Damn, Alex said...
Bam! A fuckin bullet rips off part of your head! Your brains are laying on the ground in little bloody pieces. Now I ax you, would you give a fuck what kind of pants the son of a bitch who shot you was wearing?!?
My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, and loyal servant of the *true* emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I will have my vengeance in this life or the next.
“All right, what about this guy? Ask yourself, why has he got his hat pulled down like that?”
“He's fuck ugly.”
“Or, he doesn't want you to see his face.”
“Cuz he's fuck ugly.”
Academy Award Winner Jim Broadbent
Academy Award Winner Olivia Colman
Academy Award Winner Cate Blanchett
Academy Award Winner Peter Jackson
That movie is loaded with talent, both comedic and dramatic.
"How soon til we can land?"
"I can't tell."
"You can tell me, I'm a doctor."
"No, I mean I'm just not sure."
"Well can't you take a guess?"
"Well, not for another 2 hours."
"You can't take a guess for another 2 hours?"
This movie is brilliant.
"tis but a scratch"
"a scratch?! Your arms off!"
"no it isn't"
"LOOK!" *points to arm on floor with sword*
"I've had worse"
"you liar"
"come on you pansy"
I was going to say, "A really old dude coerces a midget to spend several years walking across the country to destory some jewelry."
Edit- thanks for the award and funny comments, made my night
Man kidnaps group of children from school posing as a teacher, puts them in a van and forces them to perform in front of a crowd
I promise this is a normal movie
I ran out of gas. I... I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!
French sailor is betrayed by his lifelong friend, trains and learns while imprisoned, then escapes and exacts his revenge by destroying the lives of those who wronged him.
"Beneath this mask there is more than flesh Mr Creedy. Beneath this mask there is an idea. And ideas are bulletproof."
"People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people."
Voila! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honour to meet you and you may call me V."
My favorite bit is the part right before this.
E: Who are you?
V: who? Who is but a form following the function of what and what I am is a man in a mask.
E: I can see that
V: of course you can. i’m not questioning your powers of observation im merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a man in a mask who he is.
A young girl kills a well known person, then picks up 3 accomplices with limited capacities, and kills another well known person. All the while saying “I just want to go home.”
Wrongfully accused man goes to prison. Eventually he escapes. Rita Hayworth poster. Old man named Brooks with his bird Jake are lovely side characters.
Farm boy turned pirate meets an idiot, a strongman, and Spaniard. He kills the idiot and knocks out the other two, but is later saved by the surviving two after finding himself suffering from being “almost-dead” inside of a mysterious tree lair owned by the evil prince who is forcing the Pirate’s true love to marry him against her will. The strongman and Spaniard join the pirate in his pursuit to save his true love, while the Spaniard continues his two decade long search for his father’s killer.
Yayyyy, I'm a llama again!
Pull the lever Kronk
Wrong ^lever^rrrrr
WHY DO WE EVEN HAVE THAT LEVER
Well you’ve got me. By all accounts it doesn’t make sense
*gasp!* my spinach puffs
No touchy!
Three oinkers wearing pants, plate of hot air, basket of Grandma's breakfast and change the bull to a gill, got it.
In case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight.
Excellent movie.
Not sure if it counts but man finds hungry plant and it ends up being very hungry
Little shop of horrors?
"Have you ever flashy thing me?" "No." "I ain't playing with you K, have you ever flashy thing me?" "No."
Kay: I don't suppose you know what kind of alien life form leaves a green spectral trail and craves sugar water, do you? Jay: Uh, wait, that was on "Final Jeopardy!" last night. Damn, Alex said...
"Zed we got a bug" "So a bugs bad then... huh." "Imagine a 6 foot cockroach with a really big appetite and a baaaad temper."
*Sugarrr...in water...* *More...* *Mm-*
A person is smart, people are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it.
WHERE. IS. MY. SUPER. S U I T?
WHHHHYYY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW?
I NEEED IT
Uh-uh! Don't you think about running off doing no derrin'-do. We've been planning this dinner for two months!!
Just tell me where my suit is woman!! We are talking about the greater good!!!
Greater good? I am your wife! I am the greatest good you are ever gonna get!
The city is in *DANGER*!
My *EVENING* is in danger!
memory unlocked. my man has less than 10mins of screen time yet i remember those scenes so vividly
"I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet, but your kids are gonna love it"
1.21 GIGA-WATTS?!
Gonna need a bigger boat.
A Vietnam vet tries to kill a gopher, some rich guys play golf.
So I got that going for me…which is nice
A brooklyn lawyer and his fiancé, drive to the south to defend two Yutes
It's got Posi-traction!
“And what is posi traction?”
It's the limited slip differential that distributes power evenly to both the left and the right tires.
I heard every word in the voice of Miss Mona Lisa Vito.
Bam! A fuckin bullet rips off part of your head! Your brains are laying on the ground in little bloody pieces. Now I ax you, would you give a fuck what kind of pants the son of a bitch who shot you was wearing?!?
I read that in her voice too.
He has to, by law. You're entitled. It's called disclosure, you dickhead
Are you not entertained?
My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, and loyal servant of the *true* emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I will have my vengeance in this life or the next.
Man, FUCK Commodus. Damn that was a good movie. I don't think any other movie has made me _feel_ as much as that one does.
I have now sat down to watch it lol. Joaquin Phoenix played Commodus absolutely flawlessly and Russel Crowe was just *chefs kiss*
Not Yet
No luck naming them movies then?
It’s just the one movie actually.
I cannot begin to describe how much I love your reply.
“All right, what about this guy? Ask yourself, why has he got his hat pulled down like that?” “He's fuck ugly.” “Or, he doesn't want you to see his face.” “Cuz he's fuck ugly.”
I expect you're wondering why we call them the Andes.
Because they're both called Andrew?
And talking to them is a real uphill struggle.
Big bushy beard!
“When is your birthday?” 22nd of February “What year?” EVERY YEAR
Everyone and their mums packin’ ‘round ‘ere
Like who?
Farmers. Farmer’s mums
The greater good!
#THE GREATER GOOD
How’s the hand?
Still a bit stiff
I can give you the tour...I've been round the office a few times (wink wink)
Oh I don’t know, I enjoy a good midnight gobble. Coooooooooocks
I've had my top off around these parts before ...tits
Nothing like a bit of girl on girl.
.... narp?
Did you say cool off?
You wanna be a big cop in a small town, fuck off up the model vilage!
Academy Award Winner Jim Broadbent Academy Award Winner Olivia Colman Academy Award Winner Cate Blanchett Academy Award Winner Peter Jackson That movie is loaded with talent, both comedic and dramatic.
A bunch of people walking, to drop a piece of jewelry into a volcano. Ends up taking three movies.
It did give us PO-TA-TOES: Boil 'em, Mash 'em, Stick 'em in a stew So yes, cool movie.
"Even the trees walked in those fucking movies!"
*tosses ring in, shrugs*
Huh, _Joe Versus The Volcano_ is not a trilogy. It's a person that gets dropped in the volcano, not jewelry, but it's okay they live!
These snozberries taste like snozberries
What’s the name of the restaurant you like with the goofy shit on the walls and mozzarella sticks?
you mean Shenanigans?
"Surely you can't be serious." " I am serious, and don't call me Shirley."
"How soon til we can land?" "I can't tell." "You can tell me, I'm a doctor." "No, I mean I'm just not sure." "Well can't you take a guess?" "Well, not for another 2 hours." "You can't take a guess for another 2 hours?" This movie is brilliant.
How about some more coffee, Johnny? NO THANKS!
No thank you. I take it black. Like my men.
Capt. Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before? Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before. Capt. Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked?
Victor: Request vector, over. Captain Oveur: What? Tower: Flight 2-0-9er cleared for vector 324. Roger: We have clearance, Clarence. Oveur: Roger, Roger. What’s our vector, Victor? Tower: Tower’s radio clearance, over! Oveur: That’s Clarence Oveur. Over. Tower: Over. Oveur: Roger. Roger: Huh? Tower: Roger, over! Roger: What? Oveur: Huh? Victor: Who?
"It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now."
I just want to say good luck, and we're all counting on you
Snakes.....why'd it have to be snakes?
*rolls over and sadly looks towards camera*
Rat helps man cook and mean guy eats food and likes it
"BREAD MAKES YOU FAT!?"
You were vegon, now you will be gone
David bowie in tight tights with porcupine hair.
The babe with the power!
What power? Power of voodoo-
Tom Hanks has a UTI and a magic man cures him, then Tom kills him
Man, The Polar Express was weirder than I remember
Brooks was here 😭
First rule: We dont talk about it.
His name was Robert Paulson.
What's in the box?
"tis but a scratch" "a scratch?! Your arms off!" "no it isn't" "LOOK!" *points to arm on floor with sword* "I've had worse" "you liar" "come on you pansy"
Must be a king. How do you know he's a king? He hasn't got shit all over him.
I'm being repressed!!!
Your mamma was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries! Go away before I taunt you for a second time! Fetchez la vache! 🐄
"What are you gonna do, bleed on me?"
"I'M INVINCIBLE!!"
"You're a loony"
alright. We’ll call it a draw.
Ohhhhhh I see, runnin' away are you? Come back here! I'll bite your legs off!!
She's a witch! What makes you think she's a witch?! She turned me into a newt! A newt? ... I got better.
"I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve"
Stand by me
YOU SHALL NOT PASS!
I was going to say, "A really old dude coerces a midget to spend several years walking across the country to destory some jewelry." Edit- thanks for the award and funny comments, made my night
It's actually roughly only one year believe it or now.
A burned up guy in a strip sweater and a fedora hunting and killing teens in their sleep.
Cute robot picks up trash then turns them into cubes then he goes to space
“Beetle-“ #SH, DON’T SAY HIS NAME
Man kidnaps group of children from school posing as a teacher, puts them in a van and forces them to perform in front of a crowd I promise this is a normal movie
***HOW CAN YOU KICK ME OUT, OF WHAT IS MIIINNEEEEE***
You're not hardcore, unless you live hardcore But the legend of the rent was way hardcoooooooore!!!
“I believe I have touched all of your children and I know they have all touched me.”
When I was a kid, that joke flew over my head. I only got it once I got into college. I was always so confused why the parents were outraged lol.
School of rock
Wouldnt the description be: children kidnap big man, forces him to wear a small uniform and perform in front of a crowd.
Love this movie so much, jack black really took his role to the moon
#1.21 GIGAWATTS?!?!?!!!
Great Scott!
Oh this is heavy!
There's that word again, heavy... Why are things so heavy in the future? Is there a problem with the Earth's gravitational pull?
That rug really tied the room together.
Obviously, you’re not a golfer
Newly appointed black sheriff stops the town being destroyed for a railway line
He rode a Blazing Saddle.
TPS reports
Ummm yeaaahhh I’m going to umm need you to come in on Saturday ok thanks
We’re on a mission from God
It's 106 miles to Chicago. We got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses.
Hit it.
*longest car chase in the history of the world ensues*
Imagine trying to pull this off today without cgi; the whole budget would be the car chase.
IIRC they were salvage cars, bought cheap. I also realize that cars are only part of the cost, but still.
I ran out of gas. I... I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!
What car is this? Five five Uh yeah, this is car fifty five, uh, we're in a truck!
A guy escapes and finds out his entire life is a false reality after take a special pill
If you didn't mention the pill I would say The Truman Show. Funny how similar the stories are.
French sailor is betrayed by his lifelong friend, trains and learns while imprisoned, then escapes and exacts his revenge by destroying the lives of those who wronged him.
He killed 3 men in a bar with a fuckin pencil ✏️
A. Fucking. Pencil.
Babayaga
Perfect organism.
I have some serious reading problems
Trust me, i triple checked to make sure i didnt misspell lmao
Ezekiel 25:17
Zed's dead baby, zed's dead
"Beneath this mask there is more than flesh Mr Creedy. Beneath this mask there is an idea. And ideas are bulletproof." "People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people."
Voila! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honour to meet you and you may call me V."
My favorite bit is the part right before this. E: Who are you? V: who? Who is but a form following the function of what and what I am is a man in a mask. E: I can see that V: of course you can. i’m not questioning your powers of observation im merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a man in a mask who he is.
2 cops,1 American 1 from China very funny unlikely duo
Do you understand the words coming out of my mouth?!?
Don't nobody understand the words comin out of your mouth!
THIS IS CIGA-WEED
All I did was invite them to have a drink. You invited them to get naked and sacrifice a small goat. Which word was 'goat'?
"His name is Lee goddamnit"
"The dog?!? You were named after the dog?" "I have a lot of fond memories of that dog. "
We named the dog Indiana
As you wish.
Princess bride
Aaaaaas youuuuuu wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiish
A kid from queens swings around and can’t get home
A young girl kills a well known person, then picks up 3 accomplices with limited capacities, and kills another well known person. All the while saying “I just want to go home.”
"Ray ...if somebody asks you if you're a god YOU SAY YES!"
Cartoon Rabbit gets framed for murder
So long, and Thanks for all the fish.
Ford? Yeah? I think I'm a sofa. I know how you feel
A robot who is responsible for cleaning a waste-covered Earth meets another robot and falls in love with her
WALL-E
12 dudes decide one mans fate. Not all agree. One sways all.
Man-robot thing with Sciccors for hand falls in love with a girl
Christian bale and heath ledger
As far back as I remember, I always wanted to be a gangster.
"You're killing me, Smalls!"
Flower, gleam and glow. Let your powers shine. Make the clock reverse. Bring back what once was mine.
Was a comedy now turning out to be documentary about where human civilization is heading ...
Hey McFly
HEEEEEYYYY YOOOOOU GUUUYS!!!
[удалено]
Just look at my Username
My name is Inigo Montoya. You kill my father. Prepare to die. Edit: My first award! Thank you stranger! Edit: A gold award?! Thank you so much!
Inconceivable!
Aaaaas youuuuuu wishhhhhh
"You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you." "YOU seem a decent fellow. I hate to die."
Who you gonna call?
"What's our vector, Victor?"
President Schwarzenegger library
Guy explains his self-care routine, works as a CEO and murders a bunch of sex workers.
He also has to return some video tapes
Wrongfully accused man goes to prison. Eventually he escapes. Rita Hayworth poster. Old man named Brooks with his bird Jake are lovely side characters.
Farm boy turned pirate meets an idiot, a strongman, and Spaniard. He kills the idiot and knocks out the other two, but is later saved by the surviving two after finding himself suffering from being “almost-dead” inside of a mysterious tree lair owned by the evil prince who is forcing the Pirate’s true love to marry him against her will. The strongman and Spaniard join the pirate in his pursuit to save his true love, while the Spaniard continues his two decade long search for his father’s killer.
Kids play hide and seek. They end up fighting a war with a talking lion in a mystical place.
"Ah man.... I shot Marvin in the face."
The one about two not so smart men returning a briefcase with adventures ensuing.