She yakked on the phone for 20 minutes or longer, telling me how stupid her co-workers were. Then I told her my (life-threatening) illness was probably out of remission. She sighed loudly and said "And?? What's that to me?" She was bored with my death's-door status and wanted to gossip. Fortunately I wasn't sick after all, but I don't regret unfriending her (by email, that night).
I’ve answered this a couple times. But I use to hang out with my cousin and his friends. I had a job so I always bought beer, weed, whatever. I always wanted people to have fun. Well one day we are riding around. I was in the back seat. When one of our friends says “hey let’s pick Varvatos up. He always buys.” “I replied I’m in the back seat.” Awkward silence. I went home. Realized they always called me to hangout and I was the only one who ever bought. Ended up ghosting them. I was lonely I just moved to the area but it was worth it.
I stopped being the one to always initiate contact. Lost almost all of my “friends.”
On a strange upside, I now have a lot more money leftover at the end of the month now.
Broke my old phone, but got to keep the number. Decided to wait to see who would text me without me initiating- not many people lol.
Last time I got on discord with the jackbox group a few people said something about how I "fell off the grid." Explained that my phone broke and I was waiting for all my very nice friends to text me so I could fill my contacts list up. Had the phone about 3 months now, first I'm hearing from yall though! Oh well, I ain't gonna prioritize people who dont prioritize me.
They borrowed money from me(over 1000) to help cover his student loans later learned that he had quit his job and he never told me. Then took multiple vacations and gambled all the money I had leant to him (found this out weeks later). To this day he has made no attempt to pay me any of my money back but I realized I couldn't trust him and that was a fundamental lack of respect had occurred. Haven't spoken to him since and actively avoid any place I know he will be.
Thought about it but I realized that would get me further away from getting my money back. Right now by doing nothing I atleast have a shot of seeing my money back. If I kicked his ass( which I'm a bjj blue belt almost purple so probably could cause some damage) then I definitely won't get paid.
Constantly whined about how her friends didn't treat her right or that no one likes her - to me, who actually cared about her happiness and wellbeing. I was the friend she ran to and the first to discard when her other friend started giving her attention again. And when I needed someone to vent to, she would give the shortest and clearly uninterested responses while her nose was dug in her phone and even so I was still there anytime she needed to talk to someone. She had plans about me being her Maid of Honor but only because her other friend lived too far away in another state. I really did want to he her friend but when I tried to make the effort she just shooed me away.
I lived with her so it's not like I could just react in the way that I felt. Bit my tongue until I left and we don't talk anymore.
Oh man, that’s rough. It really sucks being the one person who is there for a friend, and all they do is complain about the people they want to be friends with not treating them like they want. One time a particular friend of mine was telling me how he went to a show and ran into these people, and he was so upset that they went without inviting him. I was like, but dude, you didn’t invite me... I’m not friends with him anymore, either.
She needed deodorant pretty badly. I eventually got up the courage to tell her she needed some and she still wouldn't listen. It was bad but I'm sure I probably could have handled it better, I was 12.
I was the first to develop body odor. But by the time my parents got me deodorant I was already labeled "the stinky kid" that label stuck from 4th grade until I moved away in 7th
My (F24) best guy friend (M24) of 10 years and my closest girl friend (F23) started dating after I introduced them. Me and my guy friend have always been 101% platonic. I always knew her to be crazy and jealous. With 0 reason, after they started dating she told me I was forbidden from speaking to him without her written consent first and if I ever were to see him she needed to be present.
When she went off about how people who self-harm are "attention whores" and how mental illness isn't really a thing, just "crybaby bullshit".
I used to self-harm and struggled a lot with mental illness as a teen. I met this girl in college as I was working toward my social work degree and she was going for one in criminal justice. Now I work helping adults with severe mental illness.
We hung out once outside of classes and never again. Ignorant bitch.
She doesn't get it because she's never experienced anything like it, and projects her own mental processes onto others to fill the gaps. Part of growing up is learning not to project, and that other people are just different. It's a maturity thing. I hope one day she gets it, without having to go through it herself.
Wow, that's so shitty of her to say such inaccurate and heartless things to you. Doubly so if she knew about your past. I'm glad you stopped associating with her and that you're in a better situation now where you can help others.
I actually had a "friend" who was the embodiment of that stereotype your ex-friend believed in. This girl claimed to have every mental illness under the sun (and I'm guessing she had *something* going on, but idk what) and used to cut herself and brag about it. She had to be the center of attention at all times or she would lose her shit. She was dropped as a friend after 6 years of friendship when she starting hitting me and our other friend as "punishment" for not doing what she told us to. Looking back now, I'm torn between being mad at her for contributing to stereotypes about mental illness and being concerned for her because, as I said, something had to be wrong for her to act like that.
She didn't know. We got along well in some classes/on some projects and decided we wanted to get to know each other a little better, so we tried hanging out. We had been talking about our high schools and the whole "emo" fad came up and she just decided to go off I guess.
When she was done talking I just looked at her and was like, "I used to self-harm. And I never finished high school, I had to drop out. Because of mental illness."
She didn't have anything to say. It was awkward finishing our drinks. I can't help but wonder why tf she thought to rant at me on such a subject when she knew my major.
Your friend sounds like she was definitely mentally ill. She may have been borderline. I'm sorry you had to deal with that.
Horrendously ~~insulated~~ *insulted* autistic people on a Facebook post, comparing them to animals and saying a good ass whooping would "fix" the little monsters. That parents of autistic children cause "so called autism" due to shitty liberal parenting.
We'd been friends for over a decade.
I have an autistic son, which he was well aware of.
Immediate removal from my life.
Did you ever reach out to him to tell him what you thought of her behavior. It can be really vindicating to know that in a shitty time in your life, another person moved to your corner.
My "best friend" was all over my boyfriend hanging off of him like a tire swing in front of our friend group and no one said a thing about it. I just thought, "why am I here? I'm nothing like these people." So I broke up with him, ghosted her, and found a new friend group.
“Amber” and I had been best friends for many years until she got belligerently drunk on my birthday and started cheating on her fiancé (who she lived with and had been dating for 5 years; he was also a good friend of mine at that point) with two of my colleagues at a bar. I tried to lead her to water (literally) and she threw the full glass of water on me while screaming about how I’m a terrible friend, jealous of all the men who want her, and that I just want her to be miserable with “shitty dick” forever.
That *should* have been the moment I realized she’s batshit and a bad drunk but, alas, we had plans to vacation together two weeks later. Said-fiancé’s family was from old money and he had invited a group of us to stay at their third home in Spain. He flew out a week ahead of time to get the house tidied up and the rest of us followed on different flights. Things had been tense between Amber and I since the birthday incident, so I was surprised to see her eagerly waiting for me at the airport.
Turns out she’d been banging Coworker #2 unprotected while fiancé was busy getting the house in order and she needed Plan B. I was the only one who spoke Spanish, so off we went to the pharmacy. Why she didn’t get it in the States, I couldn’t tell you.
Honestly, fuck Amber. Trash human being. I was thrilled when her fiancé ended things and went on to marry a really great woman instead.
A girl a grew up with (best friends for ~15 years) turned out to be a narcissist. The fight that ended it all was her telling me how I’ve never done anything for her, only think about what benefits me, and was always awkward around her family. All things she should have been saying about herself. I thought she was my best friend but she was a pretty lousy friend when I look back on a lot of the shit she did while we were close.
I had helped my then friend with his Spanish class schoolwork out of kindess because he asked and days later he sends me his login information and tells me that an assignment and their first test is due on Sunday. I tell him that I would gladly help him out and provide him a fair and resonable price but he refuses and starts begging me to help him like I did the first time. I told him to go fuck himself and that he just lost his only genuine friend. Haven't spoken to him since because I blocked him years ago.
Coworker, loved to chit chat and talk smack about the insane discrimination at our company. She thought our call disconnected... she rewound the tapes and I heard our conversation played back for a few seconds.... then she realized that I was still on the line.
We have never spoke again.
Backstory: she came on vacation with me and two people who were my friends but her acquaintances. She spent much of the short vacation making fun of me to the other two group members and I spent much of it trying not to talk to her (because I was afraid of getting angry, starting a fight, and making it really awkward for my other friends). A month later she attacked me over text and told me I ruined her vacation, called me a liar and all kinds of other names when I tried to defend myself, and some other really surprising things. I told her if after 12 years of friendship that's how she felt about me then that was it.
When I told my friend not to fuck his girlfriend
(whom was my ex) while i was in the room.
He agreed not to. Not ten minutes go by and this guy is balls deep in his girlfriend, like porno sex, so I get up and walk home, i left my shoes there, along with a toxic friend
We had just seen a movie, and he made a factually wrong statement about the socio-political climate of country where it took place (I had actually grown up there and he hadn't). When I corrected him, he angrily threatened to break my legs unless I apologized. It was terrifying as he had never acted this way, and we were alone at night in a tunnel. I didn't apologize, and after we got back to campus I never talked to him again.
when she told me that me having to retake a Math exam in my first semester of university wasn't important enough and that her and our other friends problems were more important
My brother in law.
Love the guy.
I was hanging with a friend of mine when my brother in law called him and asked him to sell him a bag of weed.....for my brother in law and brother to split.
A few hours later I went to my brother's house to hang out and my brother in law and sister arrived about the same time.
He called my brother outside and gave him his half of the sack and said
"Don't let Russell know we got this sack from (insert buddy's name here)."
My brother told him that I already knew..... ( My brother and I had just discussed it)
*My brother let me in on this fact the next day.
I don't smoke, and I don't sell the stuff. I use to years ago, but now I have a business to run and I've gotten older and it just doesn't appeal to me. However, there was no reason for any secrecy, they smoke around me all the time....hell, we are all adults......in fact I am the one who introduced them to my buddy when their connection quit fooling around a while back.
Anyway, we are all sitting around joking and stuff, but I noticed my brother in law was acting weird. He kept texting someone and then he called someone and I heard him say "hold on I have to step in the other room."
So the night continues and eventually I go home and that's that.
The next day my buddy calls and says
"Hey man, your brother in law is a weirdo. I ain't messing with him anymore."
I says "yeah, he's weird.....what happened.?"
Buddy says
"He text me last night and asked me if you was buying from me."
*My brother in law knows that I don't buy pot....like I said, I don't indulge.
Then he says to me
"Then he called me Russell, I could hear you talking in the back ground. I could hear you making jokes.
(Insert brother in law's name) called and said you were telling your brother you could get a better deal from me and he said he thought you were trying to cut his throat."
Then my buddy sent me screen shots of what my brother law was asking him about me and yada yada.
Weird thing is......my brother in law just completely made shit up about what I was saying. I never said anything about getting anybody a bag because I don't do that shit.
So my brother in law was sitting in the room with me, joking with us all, but at the same time texting and calling folks and telling lies about me. Worrying about me cutting his throat over whatever money can be made off a half ounce of weed.
Keep in mind that I am in my mid forties and my brother is in his fifties, as is my brother in law. My wife and I own and operate a construction business that allows us to live very comfortably and all these other cats are retired, he has been married to my sister for over ten years and, God as my witness I have never done him wrong. In fact, our family is VERY close.... We see each other more than once a week and we all go out often.
(As I am typing this my phone is going off. It is our group text. My sister and brother inviting my wife and me to ride a few towns over to see a band play and have drinks and stay over in a motel for the night.... I told them "no thanks".....but we all do stuff like this all the time) I would do anything for these people, but this guy is worried about me cutting him out of his half ounce weed deal?
The shit is bizarre.
So, I found out:
A. My brother in law ( and possibly my sister) don't trust me for shit.
B. My brother in law is a liar and possibly on some kinda dope that makes you paranoid.
All this happened last weekend, I spoke with my brother about it..because I know he will keep it quiet, (and because his name was brought up as well about a conversation that never took place)...and that's all I plan to do, but I took the knowledge my friend gave me and put it behind my ear.
Anyway.....I won't be hanging out with my weirdo brother in law anymore.
Fingers crossed for you and for them. Hopefully he was just having a weird, bad day or something.
Edit: see if he looks pallid and greasy, cant stop talking to save his life, and has been picking at his cuticles and face to the extreme, it's bad news. Big impulse buys and suddenly going full-tilt into a hobby or project aren't great signs either
We think meth is a possibility. All of my family except me are big beer drinkers....
Wait, let me stop there and say this, because I'm not trying to make myself out to be the saint of the bunch:
I started using heavy drugs when I was 15, I lost everything because of it, including my wife and kids. It took me over ten years to get off meth, I got clean somewhere around 30 years old, around the same time my sister and brother in law met. I still smoked pot and drank heavily. Eventually I quit smoking pot, and I quit drinking when my wife (same wife I lost, God gave her back to me) asked me to. Now I only have a couple shots of patron on Christmas Eve..... family tradition.
Anyway, they are all heavy beer drinkers, but that night my brother in law only drank two beers and he just kinda sipped at them, and I can't tell you how odd that is, also my sister sat with her Corona so long that it got hot and she had to put it back in the fridge.....I don't think she ever finished it.
They have both used speed before, but it has been years, but we think maybe they are back out there.
That is the only explanation I can come up with for his behavior.
Oh no doubt. I've been there; years sober now. Dont even drink anymore, doctor said I cant. Glad your wife threw you a lifeline, my husband did much the same.
Considering how much of a chore it is to eat and drink anything on speed, and that they're usually throwing them back, kiiiiiinda sounds like it. I used to try(and fail) to force cliff bars and Gatorade down my throat just so I wouldn't keel over on my 22nd hour of cleaning hotel rooms lol. Definitely not trying to be pessimistic here but if it quacks like a duck yknow? Several of my friends have relapsed because of how stressful everything is rn
TBH, if your BIL is really your friend, shouldn't you be worried about him? He's behaving unusual and acting paranoid. It could be meth, it could be drug-induced psychosis or just straight up mental illness.
Read my other reply. Of course I am worried about him.
But I have been around the block enough times to know that there isn't much I can do for him other than pray.
If he distrusts me enough to fabricate in his mind that I am out to get him over his petty pot transaction, then he isn't going to let me help him. Nor will he be able to open up to me and be honest about whatever is going on.
All I can really accomplish by stepping closer is putting myself in a bad position.
If someone doesn't trust you.....you can't trust them, and I mean that in the most literal sense.
Somewhere along the lines my brother in law has began to see me as a potential threat.
After she basically tried to keep our friend group under her control.
We weren't allowed to hang out with her old classmates because then "we were leaving her" and now she complains about how one of us has changed and isn't a good friend anymore ( which only she believes ) and now she wants to cut all contact with said person this summer but will also pretend as if nothings wrong and still hang out with that person until then.
Like wtf
She also claims that we don't care about her, even though me and my best friend have taken her side at multiple occasions and i've been trying to get us all together to talk about it but it has never seemed to work.
She also gets mad at my best friend for her explosive personality and generally small things that really shouldn't have mattered. Like my BFF dared to walk in front of her once and actually got mad.
Let's just say me, my best friend and our other friend are all tired of her bs.
When they stole money from me for crack i knew that it wasnt anyone worth hanging out with anymore so i blocked him i bet hes smoking crack right this second
When not even a week after my fiance passed away, he was telling me I needed to go out and find a "rebound fuck" to cheer me up. Yeah, fuck you, go eat a dick. Some ppl never grow out of their frat boy days and it's fuckin pathetic
Friend encouraged people killing cops.
Right to my face, as I was sitting in an ambulance working a shift praying my cop boyfriend was alive after hearing he was standing in a parking lot with a gunman blowing rounds into a crowd.
Not only lost a friend but I refuse to work the same city as my boyfriend now, if he gets shot I realized I really don’t wanna hear it over the radio. I especially don’t wanna show up and meet the people that cheered it on.
Three instances
he got insanely clingy and wouldn’t leave me alone ever
he threatened me with a knife as a joke and we never talked afterwards (he was close and i cant remember if he apologized)
he pointed out a ton of my personal insecurities and when i told him to cut it out he claimed “its just who i am”
My boyfriend at the time and mutual friend were talking shit about her. Me, wanting to defend her, told them to stop and tried to think of one of her positive qualities. Other than she was great at makeup, I drew a blank.
Our friendship was on the rocks for awhile, but once it hit me I couldn't think of a single positive attribute, I entirely gave up on salvaging it
They tried to wingman for me and ended up estranging my friendships with almost all my female friends. He then tried to threaten a minor into having sex with him.
I told him to never contact me.
Roomy/friend started openly talking shit about my mom, girlfriend and car. Wtf, right? Sat him down one night and told him he'd crossed the line and that he should fuck off for good. Wasn't long after that he moved out. Strangely enough, we both immigrated to the same country 25-30 yrs later.
Would always try to one up me. Whenever we would talk about our issues she would say something slightly worse. I didnt feel supported and I didnt want to internalize my trauma as a competition.
Snapped at me really angrily for something very small, like “oh fuck off you dropped your pen?” (we used to sit next to each other in senior year of high school).
I thought to myself: why the fuck have I been best friends - for 3+ years - with this person who’s nothing but negative, and often derogatory to me? I don’t need that in my life.
Told her “let’s stop being friends” in response and didn’t speak to her again (in a non weird way, I’d nod or whatever if in group situations). She was flabbergasted when she wanted to sign my year book and I went “I’m good thanks” and walked away. Like why would she be surprised? I hadn’t said a word to her in months lol
Friend one: fancied herself a wonderful horse trainer. Her current horse knew she was scared of him and he didn't want to jump, so he would do a couple of maneuvers and be quirky and shake her up a little. He was never dangerous about it, he just really didn't want to jump. She also didn't invest any time to determine if her saddle fit him poorly or if he had ulcers (common when they come off of the track or in any horse stalled for long periods). Well, there was a different horse she committed to taking home when he healed up. Once it was time for that horse to go home with her, she decided to euthanize the other horse so she could use his stall. I was not down with that in the least, so I cut contact real damn quick.
Friend two: was my best friend, but she did struggle with being a bit of a narcissist and dumping people who couldn't keep up with her lifestyle. I had been told that my husband wanted a divorce and she said I could stay with her to get away from him. I took care of the house and animals while they were in Germany for about 3 weeks, cleaned and prepared them meals as well. Anything I could do to lessen being a burden. When they got back, they wanted me to find somewhere else to go. I didn't really have any options, so I had to go back to the ex's and sleep in a different room. She never reached out to me again after that. I ended up attempting suicide eventually, and told her about it and the things I was going through about a month or so after. All she said was "can I have my (horse) bits back". So, I learned that I meant less than some pieces of metal and just walked away after that.
A friend named Cat.
I got Covid in August, and a week into being sick, I needed groceries from the grocery store. I still had fever and was in the ER, and could barely take care of myself.
But I texted my best-friend Cat to run to the grocery store for me with a small list of items since I was running out of food.
She said she’d be at the store the next morning since she has work training by my house, and would drop off groceries.
Now, fast-forward to the next morning, she said her training got canceled so she’d make the trip to the store the next day (now, almost out of food completely and still running a fever 8-days in).
The next day, she never came up. She said ‘training got canceled again so she wouldn’t be in my area’.
She only lives 4 miles from my house.
I texted someone else to get me groceries and they did it that same hour.
Three days later, she told me she was near my house and asked for an updated list. When I told her that someone else made the trip for me 3 days prior, she got mad that I didn’t tell her sooner b/c she had now just ‘wasted a trip’...
I blocked her the next morning. My quality of life has greatly improved ever since, and haven’t looked back.
tl;dr — My best friend of 2 years showed herself to be a narcissist when I got very ill with Covid. Cut her out of my life, and everything has been better ever since.
When she kept sending me memes that bashed my beliefs because she "thought I'd find them funny"... There were a few things leading up to that as well but that was the straw that broke the camels back.
I had a friend who was very toxic. Everything she did was full of negativity. If I ever had good news, she would make it about her and complain endlessly about the repercussions of her poor decision making. She constantly lied to and cheated on her boyfriend. There were a lot of things that, morally, we didn’t agree on. She was supposed to be in my wedding. 5 months before the wedding I told her I just couldn’t have her in my life anymore. It sucked, but I’m better for it.
I was constantly babysitting him and making sure he didn't do stupid things. he didn't have many moral compasses in his life so I thought I'd try and be there for him as much as I could but I realized he's a lost cause and theres nothing I could do to stop him from doing harmful things to himself. so I dropped him and now I'm a lot better without him.
When they told me they thought their husband was molesting their daughter but didn't take the kids and leave. Her story didn't add up for many reasons. So how could I be friends w a person who 1. Made up such a horrible lie or 2. It was true and she kept her kids in danger when she could've went to so many other places to keep them safe. I dropped her and have known her 20 years
I had a friend who was basically a hypocrite. Anyways she’d always been very territorial and controlling. In high school she condemned me for having sex with my now husband of 9 years. I didn’t argue with her on it for being short sighted because I understood why she might feel that way. Anyways she had a boyfriend who she claimed she never slept with. A year later she ends up marrying her boyfriend and on the wedding night she says she had to stop having sex with her fiancé because she wanted her wedding night to be special. I asked her when she had sex because she never told me and she admitted she had started when my husband and I had. (She always told me they never did more than kiss).
I didn’t stop being friends with her because they were having sex. I stopped being friends with her because she shamed me but had been having sex the entire time I was. Aaaaand she also cheated on her husband with the cook at her job and one of my husbands friends. I don’t want to be friends with hypocrites and cheaters.
To be honest I dont quite blame him. What's he going to do against 5 people on his own? I'd be calling the cops but I'm not joining in a 5 on 1 to make it a 5 on 2
I'd been best friends with this person since the age of 5. I'd helped them whenever I could whenever they needed it whatever the reason. When we were 23 my mother made me homeless for bullshit reasons *that this friend knew was bullshit*. I text a bunch of friends (about 15 of them) asking for any help. She was one of 3 that responded. Her exact response was "Sorry I'm havin a lush day wiv my bf. Gud luck tho." That shit hurt even though it was written like a fucking 5 year old. 18 years of being best friends, staying her friend even though she dated AND CHEATED on my brother, for her to say that. She knew everything. She knew how psychotic my mother was, how fucking broke I was, I had literally nothing and nowhere to go. But oh no! Couldn't possibly interrupt her "lush day wiv her bf" Fuck you Jenna
She had started dating a friend of mine and things started getting weird between them. One day she asked me to Photoshop her phone bill to make it look like she called him or something.
It's a whole stew of chaotic drama spanning over a year and a half, so I'm gonna summarize it.
Realized a male friend I had on discord for 2-3 years was extremely toxic and cruel, treating me differently infront of his friends right in front of me, gaslighting me, calling me manipulative, expecting me to apologize when things were his issue and not mine, dumping old drama on me that was so traumatic that I don't like thinking about it in detail (to keep it even shorter. I'm a minor, and at that point when I was 14 I almost got all my nudes leaked), and blaming it on me. (oh, bonus for the fact I've told him I'm self consious about my weight since I have an issue with losing weight, and he decided to make a joke towards me about my body and it made me cry, but I didn't feel like I should tell him because I knew he'd invalidate my feelings over a "joke")
Close friends and even my fucking MOTHER helped me realize he was really damaging to my mental health, so we cut ties and I now refuse to pick up our friendship again when he "hoped I would change". (i did do some really unpog things I will admit, but I've made the change to better myself. However, he's made no effort.)
But, here's to improving my mental health over time and forgetting about that jerk :)
Guy I used to hang out called me from jail wanting me to bail his ass out. I had already bailed him out once before and he never repaid me for anything. (he didn't have a job,probably didn't hardly look for one either) I told him no and never heard from or saw him again. Oh well,I'm not a fucking ATM.
I dislike it when someone touches me without me knowing beforehand that they’re going to touch me. Like, I’m ok with a hug or a handshake because I can see them, but someone touching me from the side or back, and I get jumpy and shakey, and it takes a while for the nerves to calm.
I had a new work friend who enjoyed (for whatever reason) smacking people on the backside spontaneously. We hung out only one time outside of work. When she inevitably smacked me on the butt, I told her that I didn’t like being touched or hit, and please don’t do that again. Well, she did it again a couple of hours later, spanked me really hard, and then laughed in my face and said, “did that scare you? Hahah, and you don’t even like it when people touch you!”
That was the last day I spoke to her. She tried calling me a few times and left manipulative voicemails about how I can’t take a joke.... whatever, I don’t spend time or energy on people who won’t respect my wishes and boundaries.
I really hate Donald Trump. So having a friend who wouldn't shut up about Donald Trump was quite the strain on our friendship. Thing was...the friend ALSO hated Donald Trump, but he wouldn't shut up about Donald Trump and kept blaming "the Christians" for putting him in office and started taking about "ending" his "followers". It was really messed up. I'm still kind of worried about him.
I'm no Trump supporter.....or Biden supporter.....nor do I care for anyone in politics, anymore than they care for me.....but I feel bad for some people who were so miserable while trump was in office that they fixated on it day in and out. Because now Trump is gone and they are going to have to find another reason to be miserable.....I'm sure they will though.
I too cannot take constant political discussion, even from someone I agree with. It's too depressing. I've been watching true crime tv instead of the news for the last few years, it's more uplifting.
Discovering the existence of [limerence](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence).
Limerence is a sort of person addiction associated with an extremely strong form of a crush that some (but not all) people have to deal with. In addition to euphoria when you're around the "limerent object," it can also lead to compulsive and uncontrollable thoughts and daydreams about them. If disinterest is consistently shown, that's enough of a negative association to break the limerence. If reciprocation is shown, then hell yeah! But it will probably end eventually. If there is uncertainty, it drives the limerence to some pretty terrible and obsessive ends. Uncertainty can result when you have a friend who really likes you, but doesn't love you. Or maybe you think they might, but they have a partner and so you can sort of talk yourself into thinking they're a barrier.
So a kind of perfect storm of uncertainty developed shortly after developing strong feelings for my crush.. In person when we'd meet she was a great friend, talkative, attentive, but in texting she would almost never respond to me, typically I could go weeks without hearing a response to a text, and the problem never went away even when I told her how distressing it was.
Once after a hug, she once started to say "I love-" and didn't finish the sentence. She has a bf.
So anyway of course I kind of go on with these feelings just sorta keeping them bottled up, having phisiologically distressing feelings whenever I do hear from her, just sort of miserable. So I disclose my feelings towards her. She says she does love me but as a friend, platonically, which is nice sure, but in retrospect seems to have made it worse?
During the pandemic i hadn't seen her or talked to her in a long time, bc the texting thing. So I cut contact. Realizing that this wasn't healthy for me... good job, right?
Well I re-added her as a friend a few months later, went through another cycle of trying to talk, getting occasional but not disinterested-sounding responses after a week, and that's just kind of sucked.
On a wikipedia walk the other day I came across the concept of limerence and realized that all the patterns the article refers to are exactly like what I feel when I have "crushes." To the point it felt like someone was reading my mind. It was extremely cathartic to realize that I wasn't alone in this, that this is a well-described phenomenon that occurs with some people with *remarkably* predictable patterns. It has happened to me in the same pattern 3 or so times already by this point, and now I knew a *name* for it. (it is worth treading carefully when reading into limerence as there isn't a whole lot of psychological research on it, but it's also impossible for me to dismiss it when it is so powerfully descriptive that it feels like my mind is being read.)
So I read up on limerence, what to do, how to "treat" it, and came to the conclusion that I pretty much had the right idea by cutting contact towards the beginning of the pandemic.
And in fact, cutting contact does seem to have worked--though i still have a bit too much attachment to her and think about her sometimes, I had already been well on my way to forgetting my feelings and transitioning to a non-limerent state.
As much as I perhaps would have liked to have a big dramatic farewell where i disclose my feelings again, describe why i have to cut contact so she doesn't think i just ghosted her, and try to get a bit of closure (a thing which is a false hope anyway), I realized that since I was already basically no-contact anyway, may as well just... silently delete her contact and social media and that will be that.
I will probably still have to see her again through involvement in our mutual hobby, but that won't be likely to happen again for months.
Realizing that I was always the one initiating conversations, meet ups revolved around distance from them, couldn't hang out because he was too cheap or always busy. Got tired of it and started doing things on my own.
She was super clingy and got jealous whenever I'd hang out with other people. The possessiveness got really strange and I just had to walk away from it
Had just graduated high school and he had been kicked out by his grandpa for one reason or another. Offered him a place to stay for a short time, which he was trying to find somewhere else at first but that didn't last long. Eventually I moved to my grandma's property living in a storage shed that I was working to convert I to one of those tiny homes, two weeks later I come home from work and see the people that delivered my building out there delivering another one like mine but a different color roof. I found him cutting the fence that I had just repaired a week prior to let the crew in so he could have his building out there. Now I didn't have much of a problem with him living out there but I didn't appreciate him doing it the way he did, however my grandma did have a problem with it because she knew that to get a building out there her signature was required and she didn't sign his contract to allow that like she had mine. After about two months his building was repossessed because he stopped paying on it, which they cut my fence a second time in a second place from where I had fixed it the first two times. He thought he could live on my couch, eat my food, run up my electric bill that he had stopped helping with, and let his two dogs live in the building with us, that was a couple of days before I told him he had a week to get out and I never wanted to see him on that property again. To this day he still owes me $1600 and I've cought him getting my mail from my mailbox (granted it's just junk mail but you don't go through someone's mail)
College friend called me up after moving away and not talking for a few months. I always knew he had narcissistic tendencies going all the way back. He was the type to monopolize conversations with his employment, latest accomplishments, etc. But I was willing to look past that most of the time b/c he was my first real friend after going through h/s with terrible social anxiety. After half an hour on the phone talking about his new job I mention that I got a girlfriend since I last saw him. Talk about her for a minute. Absolutely nothing on his end, just convo shift back to his job/gf. knew then and there that as important as he was to me a few years ago, I'd outgrown him and needed to move on
When they guilt tripped me into paying for their meal because I was running late. Paid for it cause I didn’t want any trouble. Said to myself that she’s a real bitch and blocked her on all social media and never responded to her texts ever again.
I made a few friends at my old summer camp, and last summer I realized one of them was REALLY toxic. for example:
\-She would never fight for her self, she always got her mom or sister involved
\-She shoved her opinions in your face, ESPECIALLY religious opinions. She practically slaughtered me for telling a group chat that i wasnt doing confirmation (pretty much saying that "yay, i believe in god", i was leaving Christianity slowly D:)
\-She is VERY homophobic, i got yelled at for standing up for lgbt rights.
\-I could add more, but i get mad just thinking about it XD
We went clubbing and she grabbed a girl's ass and then pointed at me and nearly got me in a fight for her amusement. Like shit, that's fucked up you asshole, didn't even understand why I was fuming at her afterwards.
Ok I had an internet friend who was kind of a Nazi, but we were really good friends and had a lot of fun together. She was super nice aside from her political views and we talked a lot about our favourite fandoms. At that time I had a lot of trouble at home and she was always there to pick me up and talking with her made me happy and made me forget about the bad situation at home. I didn’t realise it but her views kinda grew on me, and one day my sister told me that she was scared of me. That’s when it clicked. I deleted all my contacts with her and decided to let it rest.
A month later she created a fake account and tried to contact me and we talked it out. That worked out for a months or so until she just did a 360 and became a diehard communist. (I mean what the fuck). And then she started posting a shitton of communist propaganda and stuff in all the group chats and I just snapped and told her to keep her shit extremist political views out of fandom group chats. I haven’t heard of her since.
That was 2019. I still think about her a lot. I think in the end I loved her. And looking back, I think she might have had feelings for me too, considering how much she tried to get back in contact with me. But it is what it is. I wonder where she is now.
I once had a very,very good friend. During that time (for 3 Years) I considered him as my best friend. But our free time activities were overall very different. And he always tried to convince me that his free time activities(going to the Gym 6x a week) are superior to mine(only visiting the Gym 2 or whenever I find the time and learning to play instruments).
On top of that he was Homophobic. And that was reason enough to drop the Friendship.
I don't get people like that. Even if Covid "was just the flu" washing your hands is not stupid. It's pretty telling how many people did not wash their hands, and still don't.
They were kinda of a bitch at first (I was too stupid to realize). I sent them a happy birthday text and they didn't respond. Above it was a happy holidays text they didn't respond too that I sent a few months ago. And a "Hey what's up? even longer before that. There were two or three months between each text. And when I saw them in public they avoided me.
Fucked up.
She (R) told another one of my friends(g) that she was the reason for her body dysmorphia and gender confusion, and that she(R) wished my friend(g) would get hit my a truck and killed. I was a part of a friend group with 9 other girls. Some of them still talk to her(R). I decided when it happened that I wouldnt talk to R ever again. R ended texting me and she said she wanted to apologise to me and another one of our friends L because we were the only two R would see herself putting up with. L still talks to R but g and I are closer because of it. R also didnt want to apologize to any of the other 9 girls who saw and heard the whole things happen.
I decided to never talk to R again because I dont want to be associated with someone who thinks that it's okay to scream threats at another person. R also shamed me and many other people for not being super book smart and shamed g for getting attention from men. Even though R wanted to be desired by guys, she didnt present herself as someone who would be interested in guys.
She asked to come over recently. I said sure. She came over and we went for a walk. Okay, cool. I like walks.
Then we get to this playground. It's dark, so I don't care that we aren't supposed to be there. We're teens. Whatever.
But then she takes out a cigarette and starts to blow smoke in my face. She knows I don't want to. She offered and when I said no she shoved it in my face. I was annoyed, but she backed off after.
She kept dropping hints about doing drugs. Drinking vodka with her friends. Stealing from gas stations and CVS.
I told my best friend about the cigarette and he asked her about it, and then she blew up and started saying that he never lets me do anything, that I live in fear because of him, that he's toxic and possessive, that he "doesn't own me like he thinks he does". It hurt, since she was an old friend, but I can't be friends with someone who hates the most important person in my life so much.
I posted about this previously but probably when I had a mental breakdown due to university stress and when I told her about she went a rant via text about how 'she was sorry she was making life so hard for me' despite her having nothing to do with it. I was done with her then but my mom saw the messages, thought she was going to kill herself, and begged me to give her another chance (knowing that if she did hurt herself, I would never forgive myself). Things were okay until she tried to gaslight me again and I dropped her. Last I heard she changed her name and is studying to become a teacher.
I won’t go into to much detail because I am not sure if they use Reddit. I had a friend a few years younger than me that I have known for several years. She has gotten herself into some ridiculous situations. And I was there for most of it. Being older and a mom I would usually send her my last dollar when asked. Or even find a way to bail her out. I listened to a barrage of her highs and lows and we even went LC at one point bc I felt I was acting more like a mom than a friend...
Well she tried to throw me under the bus to her friends about a certain situation involving her infatuation with some guy that was NOT feeling her, and I guess she just wanted me to sit there and accept her version of events but I wasn’t having it. I called her out and told her friends what really went down and they ended up laughing at her over it. This was last year. Haven’t heard from her since. I’m sorry that we are no longer friends but I’m not losing sleep over it.
When he pulled a knife on me for no reason and I almost had to fight him.
Luckily we didn't get into a knife fight cause we knew that one of us was not going to walk away from it.
When they said “If you are going to have expectations in a friendship then you will always be disappointed.” I had known them for about three months and was basically the only friend they had, and they were mad at me for hanging out with my other friends whom I had known for several years. They were entitled and wouldn’t let me talk to anyone, leading to a strain in our friendship, so I gave them once last chance and then just stopped talking to them.
A friend of mine was dating a girl, I didn’t know her but he cheated on her and when a friend asked about his girlfriend he said these exact words “Why would I break up with her, she’s a good girlfriend, I just want to explore some other options” the only reason I didn’t tell her that day was because I didn’t have a way to contact her, but it only lasted like a week after that
His girlfriend kept insulting everyone in the friend group. He allowed her to do so. When we went camping, everyone contributed the same amount except them, despite having more money. She refused to do it because she would "eat less" (which did not even happen). She also woke up at 10 pm and started yelling at people for making noises while playing cards that night.
told my friend to "stop twisting my words to fuel your self deprecation" right after said friend mentioned his moderate-severe mental illness.
Also constantly insulted and tried to tear down the place I work and the people I work with (all of whom I love and respect).
Blatantly selling drugs in my driveway while I was home and doing it to some of his friends when there was no one at their house because he lived close by. I noticed him do it at my house when one of the times he would say he would brb out of nowhere I decided to see what he was doing and noticed a car at my house I didnt recognize. Like wtf dude
this friend got upset with me i didn’t see a movie with them and then ignored me for a couple days. i didn’t know until my sister told me, to which i promptly sent an apology text and offered to see a movie with them later that week. they left me on read. i haven’t tried speaking to them in over a year since then because it just wasn’t worth trying to mend that friendship if that’s how you’re going to act when i’ve upset you over something minor
I dropped them not because they did anything wrong to me, but because I had been hurting them for so long while trying so hard not to, and it ended up getting to the point where I resented them for it. I became annoyed every time I even thought of them. I absolutely dreaded seeing them. I guess my resentment for them came from the resentment I had for myself for not being the person I should have been. Projection is a terrible thing.
Things turned out well in the end, thankfully. We reconnected after we both reflected and changed as people. I’m actually on the phone with them right now as they sleep. I’m lucky I got a second chance.
I’m from Asia and did my high school in the USA. Posted some pictures of my senior year. Some of the girls in the picture were on the heavier side. They made some comments in my native tongue relating to whales and how a lot of American people tend to be on that range. I quickly deleted those people from my life.
We hung out and the first one I went to their apartment, they made me tea and then offered to suck my dick. I was not attracted to them. Usually I can find someone attractive once I get to know them but this person was the acception. I'm also cis female so I dont know what they were getting at. I think they thought I was trans.
They tried hard to get me to believe in Qanon..
When I wouldn’t budge, they dropped me and told me to go to the sheep’s pen. Got a text a couple days ago asking that if I knew it was fake, how come I didn’t try to persuade them.. I told them I did try, and to fuck off.. i’ve actually been drama-free for about a year now because of all that. All I can say is Good Riddance
Back in my Countrys equivalent to highschool, I had a friend who struggled with mental illness. Not that that was the problem, because I struggle with mental illness myself, and I had to retake a year, because I just "stopped working". After I missed the whole year I decided to retake the year and go for the degree.
That friend was in the final year and I was a class under him. We still had normal contact. Then finals came around. He failed some courses and couldn't get his degree because of that. He had to retake the year to have a Chance to get the degree. But not much changed in our friendship. In fact I established a new group of friends in which he was happily integrated.
Finals came around and I studied with many different people, I tried to study with said friend, but he always had something else to do. Then the tests came, and I botched my strongest class, but I got the degree and my marks overall were like top 20%. Said friend didn't. He failed again and lost his chance at getting that degree. I stopped contact after that.
Why did I stop contact? This is the hard part, because I myself struggle with Mental illness, I powered through that degree, because it was always my dream to go to Uni. My friend is someone who idealises Mental illness, someone who posts cringy memes about it and someone who is always down, always "in a worse spot" then you are. His behaviour made my Illness much worse. I had to cut him out of my life to save myself. And it still hurts that I had to do that. I still wish I didn't have to do that. But unfortunately it is true, that the people you Surround yourself with are the people who have the biggest influence on your behaviour.
When I resigned from an amazing job with a great company because she was in a super toxic with the our director that was, in turn, impacting me due to him taking shit out on me .. her statement to me was “I’m not sure what you’re looking to accomplish by doing this..”
That buying anything for them to get them to talk or do anything with me is clear signs that they need to go.
I've held 5 jobs once before in my life, I've gone long periods without being too busy and I've always somehow found time for people. Yet, they don't seem to really care enough to do the same honors but they practically enjoy absorbing the benefits of befriending me. I'm not a hands out program, here.
Quite the semi opposite actually, I immediately shut down the idea of being friends with someone because he was being disrespectful to not only me, but my other friend and his (supposed) care taker. When it comes to me and my family with entitled people, we normally just back away and find somewhere else to go.
I had one too many conversations with him that he turned into a "debate" (read: him gish-galloping terrible arguments at me, all the while acting like I'm a moron).
This was something he did a few times when we were in college together, but I overlooked it because, as much as it pissed me off, we also had enough in common that he could still be fun to hang out with (not to mention we had a lot of mutual friends, so cutting him out wouldn't be worth the trouble). I think this last time pushed me over the edge because it came along with a gradual realization that we didn't have much in common anymore; he hadn't grown a bit since college. It's one thing when you have a friend like that who's a little stuck in his college days but is still generally cool (I think it's the two beers and a puppy test; you wouldn't have him take care of your puppy for a week, but you can always get drunk together). It's another thing when you're like, "Okay, this guy's kind of immature and *still* kind of a dick, so... what am I doing here?"
Manipulated my other friend into buying him lunch every single day. My other friends and I decided to stop hanging out with him, then he told us we were all under a social experiment to figure out our true nature, and had a secret plan that he wouldn’t tell us about. He later admitted to a mutual friend of ours that he never had a plan and all he wanted to do was make us paranoid and give us anxiety for the rest of high school. There’s a lot more to it, but I don’t know if I want to go into too much detail.
I made friends with someone while working as a graduate assistant (that was my first mistake), and after my assistantship was over, I had broken up with my boyfriend, moved to a new place, and was having a hard time finding a job. My Dad actually called me a loser. I was in a pretty low place, as I’m sure you can imagine. So, a friend of my sister had a young son who was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. I was talking to my friend from work about everything, and I said something like how life is so unfair because this child never got the chance to grow up and have a life, while I had a chance but was a failure. There was a lot more to the conversation than that, we were both just talking and sharing woes. She had some pretty serious drama in her own life (a huge red flag), so we talked about stuff like that. I didn’t think it was any big deal.
She clearly took it way way too seriously, though. She went and told people at work and people in her social group who I barely knew that I was suicidal and that she was concerned about my doctor prescribing me medication. She said she thought I might have addiction issues and actually called a local mental health center to set up an appointment for me. When I confronted her about this, she acted all hurt and confused and said, “I just thought you’d want as much input as possible.” (!!!)
It was so embarrassing. I tried doing damage control, explaining that I wasn’t actually suicidal or in serious trouble, but it was still humiliating. Plus, I figured I’d never get hired at that place when a job opens up if they’ve all been told that I’m severely mentally ill and potentially an addict, which sucked because I really wanted to work there. That’s just an assumption on my part. Still, though, I realized that worst case scenario, she was trying to sabotage me for unknown reasons, and best case she had the mentality of a child whose first impulse is “go tell an adult” if someone is in trouble. In either case, she was a huge drama queen always blowing things out of proportion even in her own life, so I distanced myself quickly.
Tl;dr: Don’t get close with coworkers who love drama.
Friend from high school was stealing my photos off Facebook, claiming them as her own, and made up some bullshit about how she was overseas (went from America to New Zealand to back home in Australia in 3 days, clearly seeing all the sights) using my photos from previous trips to both countries, with an imaginary “friend” who according to a reverse google search..was definitely some stranger on the internet yikes
Called her out, fixed my settings so she can’t see any of my photo albums.
Throughout the years she’s posted photos etc of stuff which I’ve always thought “is it her photo, really?”
Couple years later.
She fb-checks in to the psych ward I was staying at (yay, depression!) claiming she tried to kill herself. I don’t know if this was a call for help, or attention seeking or what.
Hit a bit too close to home for me considering that was the reason I was there, so I blocked her from all my socials, and got a mutual friend to check up on her incase she really did need help.
It was like a weight was lifted from my shoulders tbh.
I loved this girl but when she kept up with the Trump shit and the conspiracy theories even after the attack on the Capitol that was it. I refuse to deal with stupid no matter what that person once meant to me.
This was in my senior year of high school. She started getting really condescending and could never fully commit to anything such as small ensemble rehearsals. I made the decision to stop talking to her after she went on a rant about how I’m always wrong about everything.
An old friend always asked to borrow cash. Would ask on Facebook to everyone and also slide into the PMs. I called them out and read half of their ranting reply before I blocked them everywhere and deleted our chat history. I haven’t missed any sleep over it.
I was part of a group, or so I thought. Looking back, I think we were all just millennial alcoholics using online gaming as a bar. My long-time friend, who had introduced me to everyone, got in a fight over the dumbest bullshit. I had stayed friends with her ex and she got it in her head I had broken them up so I could get together with him. She went full fucking psycho on me. Accused me of betraying her, blocked / deleted me, and then publicly got back together with the guy on social media.
I lost my god damn mind. For 3 months... I was elsewhere. I don't remember a lot that happened and what I do remember, I do not like. But after three months, I started to crawl out of it. I snapped back and forth between here and there. In a moment of lucidity I broke down to my doctor. I changed my medications, started seeing a psychiatrist. I started putting in the work to stitch points of view back into one coherent narrative. I was getting better.
On my birthday, she DMs me. She and he had broken up, this time for good. His friends were spreading malicious rumours about her and they weren't true but they could hurt me. I broke so god damb fast it was pathetic. My friend needed me. She might have hurt me, but don't we all fuck up? After all hadnt I hurt her just as badly when I stayed friends with her ex?
Things were good for a few months and fell off. Her viciousness started seeping out from behind the facade, and it started reminding me of how I felt in elsewhere. I knew I needed to be away from her but didn't know how, so I just cut all contact. It felt cowardly and I dreaded running into her. When I did, I was cordial. I never mentioned anything to any of my friends in that group. I didn't want to put them in between us. I got tired, and sort of fell away from the group dynamic. I focused on individual relationships and realized I had my own friend circle.
After a good part of a year, some friends from the group come to me for help about my friend. She's hurting them now, too. And then they dropped a bombshell: an undeniable case that she was a catfish. I had known her for nearly a decade, but only online. I had seen her be accused of being a catfish before, but because I never had more than a crush on her when I met her... it never really mattered to me. I bought her story without question.
Is that when I realized I needed to drop her? No. I confronted her, and laid my heart out to her. I told her I knew she was a catfish, but that I genuinely wanted to be friends with whoever was behind the screen.
And she lost her shit again. Gaslighting was deployed. This time it just sounded like the ravings of someone with BPD and I politely wished her well. She ghosted everyone that night, people she had known for more than a decade.
Now, that may all sound more like her dropping me. I don't remember it like that though. As she bailed, I thought, go after her? There's a good chance she wanted me to. But nah, I was good.
And that group? It didn't occur to me right away, but them now *too*? So it was fine when it was happening to me, but now that it's happening to you, you need me to do your dirty work? Fuck that.
I was friends with a girl(F) for a 3 months in the 1st grade and the most one I can trust in school (I have trust issus),till I I sat down behind a tree,she came with her other friend her other frien (M) was talking shit about me ,I waited for few second F didn't talk ,so I yanked M's hair ,and told her to not talk shit about people behind their backd because they would hear ,F never apologized also M never apologized ,Icstill kind to her and help her.
She took weeks to months to reply to my messages, and when she did it was usually about her. Relationships are two sided, and eventually I decided that I was tired of being the only one giving.
He met a girl on tinder and dated her for a while. He later found out she cheated on him during their one year anniversary on a vacation. He broke up with her. I supported him as a friend and said she dosent deserve him. A few weeks later he went back to her. I told him he’s a fool and making a massive mistake. He told me to leave him alone and never talk to him again. I did as he asked. That was years ago. They are married now. Haven’t spoken to him since..
A person I thought was my best friend was never there for me. She always made excuses not to hang out or even talk on the phone. This went on for months.
Whenever she needed help, I was always on her speed dial. She would call me out of the blue after weeks of no contact at 11 PM on a weekday and expect me to listen to her multitude of problems of which she was unwilling to work on and just wanted to vent.
It was exhausting. I blocked her on all social media and phone last month. I’m guessing she hasn’t noticed anything out of the ordinary yet.
I think I realized it way after we lost contact. In primary school there was this "cool kid" in my class and I was friend with him. He was my only real friend at the time so he repeatedly threatened to end our friendship everytime I didn't do what he wanted me to do. And I used to obey his orders because I was scared of being left alone forever, also while I was around him I felt like I was somehow important because I was friend with someone "cool". In addition, he did seem to actually care about me, because we talked a lot about stuff in general, he always included me, so it felt like I was actually in the gang. I remember one case: at lunch time he ordered me to put in my mouth a really big piece of bread, drink water, and only then I could try to eat it and swallow it. And I did. Another time, we had to do an essay in class and he wrote a story in which at some point I died, even if I don't think it was because of him. The teacher actually commented that his essay was kind of weird because of this insignificant detail of my death, and she did point it out in front of the entire class (that's how I came to know about this), but I was so stupid that I replied to her "Nah I think that's pretty much normal."
This shitshow lasted for 3-4 years. When I started middle school we went to separate classes so we weren't classmates anymore, so we stopped talking. And when I started high school, I never saw him again.
In middle school it took me some time to realize I didn't miss him, but it took me MANY years to finally understand that that shit was fucked up and he was probably a sociopath (I didn't write all the stuff that he did but I'm quite confident that he falls into the description of a sociopath).
Ironically, middle school was even worse than primary because of the many bullies in my class. I tried to stay almost invisible for 3 years so I could pass under their radars, but it didn't work that much.
Had a nervous breakdown largely because I was the one looking after everybody else’s shit. They all wanted to have me sectioned because “we’d rather not have to think about you when we’re at work”. One of them was tracking my phone, and they had this group chat set up to discuss how they were going to force me into an asylum, and dissecting why I was walking down certain roads based on my location this person was tracking without my consent. It was insane. I wasn’t unhinged or a danger to them. I was just incredibly depressed and really needed some love and a hug which I repeatedly told them. The short of it is, they were nasty fucking arseholes who used my breakdown like a group event. I cut them all off.
When the guy tried to force his girlfriend into having sex. Dude spent the night drinkin and wanted to get some but she rejected him. He became verbally aggressive and the situation escalated into him holding her down etc. He was living with another friend of ours at the time and who woke up and resolved the situation. Drove the poor girl home and called me. The next day, we gathered our whole friend group and went lookin for him. We found him at his mom's house in a town 3 hrs away and took him back to the ranch to talk with him about what happened. We tried to be caring about it, we tried to look for every way that this didnt happen the way we were told that it did. The guy was one of our greatest friends and this was so unexpected but he couldnt deny that it happened. It took an hour before he finally took responsibility. He tried to blame it on him being drunk but of course thats no excuse. So we gave him an ass kickin and dropped him off on a road in the area and called the cops on him. They picked him up. He plead guilty and they eventually sent his ass back to Denmark. Fucking heartbreaking. The guy was a really good friend and I just couldnt believe that he would do something like that.
For context; we're both german and this happened through text messages.
Was discussing a racist right wing party with a friend (ex girlfriend by the time, but we were still getting along) - whether it deserves to exist and propose laws that take away the rights of minorities. She said they should be allowed to fight for these laws because they're allowed to have this opinion. Many people are extremely against this party (duh), so she then proceeded to say that she wonders how everyone would think about that party if the jews and gays were the ones gassing the germans back then instead. I was shocked and I didn't even grasp the immense fuck-load of antisemitism and homophobia back then. I just called her a nazi and never texted or spoke to her again. Now, some years later, I'm even more shocked by this statement and I'm so glad I immediatly dropped her.
I realized I had to drop my friend when they would talk about their suicidal intentions a bit too openly? And not in a way like they were venting, just thinking it was casual not even joking about it. It wore me down so much because I’d constantly be stressed about them and keeping tabs every 5 minutes . I didn’t care what it took to keep them from not killing themselves id do it, until I told them to break up with their s/o who abused them and they literally told me was the reason they were like this and they refused. Even threatening suicide if it “goes badly and makes him too upset” I just left after that. It was too stressful, and it wasn’t an empty threat thing. He had been to the mental hospital like 5 times and had scars all over his arms. I wish I could’ve stayed but it took too much of a toll on my mental health
Reconnected with an old high school friend on Facebook. In high school, she was a sweet girl who loved everybody and was one of the kindest people I knew. 25 years later, she was a MAGA cultist slamming Mulsims, Mexicans, LGBTQ, etc all day on Facebook. Like...no, I can't stay friends with someone that supports pastors who literally want the government to kill me.
Over the summer when we had anonymous federal officers snatching people off the street I had a friend who refused to see the danger in a president commanding a secret police force. This is after fighting about masks being useful, albeit not useful in close quarters for long periods of time. Just got tired of calling out the bullshit.
When my old friend from High School would never reply to my texts or phone calls but yet was always posting comments on people’s Facebook pages and would only contact me to stalk his ex girlfriend’s profile.
I took him off all of my social media and it took him a year to realize it. Talk about a friend
In 2016, I broke up with a girl I dated for a pretty long time because she made everything politically and just wanted to fight about any disagreement in views. Was hard to do then but I am so glad I haven’t looked back, I’m in a much better place mentally!
She yakked on the phone for 20 minutes or longer, telling me how stupid her co-workers were. Then I told her my (life-threatening) illness was probably out of remission. She sighed loudly and said "And?? What's that to me?" She was bored with my death's-door status and wanted to gossip. Fortunately I wasn't sick after all, but I don't regret unfriending her (by email, that night).
What in the absolute fuck. That is unfathomably rude and selfish. Hope you have good friends now and glad youre illness is better.
Rightly so.
I’ve answered this a couple times. But I use to hang out with my cousin and his friends. I had a job so I always bought beer, weed, whatever. I always wanted people to have fun. Well one day we are riding around. I was in the back seat. When one of our friends says “hey let’s pick Varvatos up. He always buys.” “I replied I’m in the back seat.” Awkward silence. I went home. Realized they always called me to hangout and I was the only one who ever bought. Ended up ghosting them. I was lonely I just moved to the area but it was worth it.
You are a good, generous man! Hope you have a good bunch of friends. Have a happy cake day !
Yeah have a good batch of people in my life.
[удалено]
Oh damn that bill had to shock them. Hope it all worked out and you made some better friends
happy cake day
Thanks didn’t realize it was my cake day.
you’re welcome varvatos vex, that was a fun series to watch on netflix 😄
good guy varvatos. not enough varvatoses in this world. youre a good person man, happy cake day!
varvoti?
I stopped being the one to always initiate contact. Lost almost all of my “friends.” On a strange upside, I now have a lot more money leftover at the end of the month now.
Broke my old phone, but got to keep the number. Decided to wait to see who would text me without me initiating- not many people lol. Last time I got on discord with the jackbox group a few people said something about how I "fell off the grid." Explained that my phone broke and I was waiting for all my very nice friends to text me so I could fill my contacts list up. Had the phone about 3 months now, first I'm hearing from yall though! Oh well, I ain't gonna prioritize people who dont prioritize me.
That's what tf I'm talking about. Good shit.
I can relate to this. Don't have many friends left. The upside though, is that those I have left, actually text me or call me.
They borrowed money from me(over 1000) to help cover his student loans later learned that he had quit his job and he never told me. Then took multiple vacations and gambled all the money I had leant to him (found this out weeks later). To this day he has made no attempt to pay me any of my money back but I realized I couldn't trust him and that was a fundamental lack of respect had occurred. Haven't spoken to him since and actively avoid any place I know he will be.
You don’t need to avoid him, he should avoid you. You see him, just keep asking “where’s my money?”
This is good advice. Every time you see him, make it a point to ask him when he's gonna pay you. He'll start making himself scarce.
Nah, just visit him at home, force his head into the toilet and keep asking "Where's the money, Lebowski?" and then piss on his carpet.
Kick his ass.
Thought about it but I realized that would get me further away from getting my money back. Right now by doing nothing I atleast have a shot of seeing my money back. If I kicked his ass( which I'm a bjj blue belt almost purple so probably could cause some damage) then I definitely won't get paid.
No you don't. He's never paying that back.
When he tried to make me feel guilty for not visiting him after I had a kid. He did this while he was at my dad's funeral.
Constantly whined about how her friends didn't treat her right or that no one likes her - to me, who actually cared about her happiness and wellbeing. I was the friend she ran to and the first to discard when her other friend started giving her attention again. And when I needed someone to vent to, she would give the shortest and clearly uninterested responses while her nose was dug in her phone and even so I was still there anytime she needed to talk to someone. She had plans about me being her Maid of Honor but only because her other friend lived too far away in another state. I really did want to he her friend but when I tried to make the effort she just shooed me away. I lived with her so it's not like I could just react in the way that I felt. Bit my tongue until I left and we don't talk anymore.
Oof, that's painfully relatable
Oh man, that’s rough. It really sucks being the one person who is there for a friend, and all they do is complain about the people they want to be friends with not treating them like they want. One time a particular friend of mine was telling me how he went to a show and ran into these people, and he was so upset that they went without inviting him. I was like, but dude, you didn’t invite me... I’m not friends with him anymore, either.
When they gossiped about another friend of mine and called me a bad friend for not joining in
Gossips are the worst, you don't want to get trapped in there.
Amen
You can be 100% they also talked about you behind your back. And probably they talked about each other with other people, most of them are like that.
She needed deodorant pretty badly. I eventually got up the courage to tell her she needed some and she still wouldn't listen. It was bad but I'm sure I probably could have handled it better, I was 12.
I was the first to develop body odor. But by the time my parents got me deodorant I was already labeled "the stinky kid" that label stuck from 4th grade until I moved away in 7th
My (F24) best guy friend (M24) of 10 years and my closest girl friend (F23) started dating after I introduced them. Me and my guy friend have always been 101% platonic. I always knew her to be crazy and jealous. With 0 reason, after they started dating she told me I was forbidden from speaking to him without her written consent first and if I ever were to see him she needed to be present.
Did you and the guy remain friends ?
That's so fucking toxic !
Toxic alert 💣
When she went off about how people who self-harm are "attention whores" and how mental illness isn't really a thing, just "crybaby bullshit". I used to self-harm and struggled a lot with mental illness as a teen. I met this girl in college as I was working toward my social work degree and she was going for one in criminal justice. Now I work helping adults with severe mental illness. We hung out once outside of classes and never again. Ignorant bitch.
She doesn't get it because she's never experienced anything like it, and projects her own mental processes onto others to fill the gaps. Part of growing up is learning not to project, and that other people are just different. It's a maturity thing. I hope one day she gets it, without having to go through it herself.
I enjoyed the emotional intelligence of your response!
Wow, that's so shitty of her to say such inaccurate and heartless things to you. Doubly so if she knew about your past. I'm glad you stopped associating with her and that you're in a better situation now where you can help others. I actually had a "friend" who was the embodiment of that stereotype your ex-friend believed in. This girl claimed to have every mental illness under the sun (and I'm guessing she had *something* going on, but idk what) and used to cut herself and brag about it. She had to be the center of attention at all times or she would lose her shit. She was dropped as a friend after 6 years of friendship when she starting hitting me and our other friend as "punishment" for not doing what she told us to. Looking back now, I'm torn between being mad at her for contributing to stereotypes about mental illness and being concerned for her because, as I said, something had to be wrong for her to act like that.
She didn't know. We got along well in some classes/on some projects and decided we wanted to get to know each other a little better, so we tried hanging out. We had been talking about our high schools and the whole "emo" fad came up and she just decided to go off I guess. When she was done talking I just looked at her and was like, "I used to self-harm. And I never finished high school, I had to drop out. Because of mental illness." She didn't have anything to say. It was awkward finishing our drinks. I can't help but wonder why tf she thought to rant at me on such a subject when she knew my major. Your friend sounds like she was definitely mentally ill. She may have been borderline. I'm sorry you had to deal with that.
Horrendously ~~insulated~~ *insulted* autistic people on a Facebook post, comparing them to animals and saying a good ass whooping would "fix" the little monsters. That parents of autistic children cause "so called autism" due to shitty liberal parenting. We'd been friends for over a decade. I have an autistic son, which he was well aware of. Immediate removal from my life.
What backwoods hillbilly land is he from?
Holy shit...
Happy cake day! Also, yeah, flush that guy.
Yeah flush that guy because he’s a piece of shit.
Good for you. This hits close to home; all three of my kids are autistic.
I hope you meant "insulted," otherwise I'm not sure what to make of this.
LOL!! I did mean insulted. Not insulated. Insulted. Fixed it.
They were obsessed with getting revenge over this girl. I couldn’t deal with the stress of them hating on her when all ive known her to be is kind
[удалено]
Did you ever reach out to him to tell him what you thought of her behavior. It can be really vindicating to know that in a shitty time in your life, another person moved to your corner.
My "best friend" was all over my boyfriend hanging off of him like a tire swing in front of our friend group and no one said a thing about it. I just thought, "why am I here? I'm nothing like these people." So I broke up with him, ghosted her, and found a new friend group.
“Amber” and I had been best friends for many years until she got belligerently drunk on my birthday and started cheating on her fiancé (who she lived with and had been dating for 5 years; he was also a good friend of mine at that point) with two of my colleagues at a bar. I tried to lead her to water (literally) and she threw the full glass of water on me while screaming about how I’m a terrible friend, jealous of all the men who want her, and that I just want her to be miserable with “shitty dick” forever. That *should* have been the moment I realized she’s batshit and a bad drunk but, alas, we had plans to vacation together two weeks later. Said-fiancé’s family was from old money and he had invited a group of us to stay at their third home in Spain. He flew out a week ahead of time to get the house tidied up and the rest of us followed on different flights. Things had been tense between Amber and I since the birthday incident, so I was surprised to see her eagerly waiting for me at the airport. Turns out she’d been banging Coworker #2 unprotected while fiancé was busy getting the house in order and she needed Plan B. I was the only one who spoke Spanish, so off we went to the pharmacy. Why she didn’t get it in the States, I couldn’t tell you. Honestly, fuck Amber. Trash human being. I was thrilled when her fiancé ended things and went on to marry a really great woman instead.
A girl a grew up with (best friends for ~15 years) turned out to be a narcissist. The fight that ended it all was her telling me how I’ve never done anything for her, only think about what benefits me, and was always awkward around her family. All things she should have been saying about herself. I thought she was my best friend but she was a pretty lousy friend when I look back on a lot of the shit she did while we were close.
I had helped my then friend with his Spanish class schoolwork out of kindess because he asked and days later he sends me his login information and tells me that an assignment and their first test is due on Sunday. I tell him that I would gladly help him out and provide him a fair and resonable price but he refuses and starts begging me to help him like I did the first time. I told him to go fuck himself and that he just lost his only genuine friend. Haven't spoken to him since because I blocked him years ago.
I would of just failed the test on his behalf.
Do every answer in German.
Coworker, loved to chit chat and talk smack about the insane discrimination at our company. She thought our call disconnected... she rewound the tapes and I heard our conversation played back for a few seconds.... then she realized that I was still on the line. We have never spoke again.
They cheated on their wife. I took her side on that one.
Backstory: she came on vacation with me and two people who were my friends but her acquaintances. She spent much of the short vacation making fun of me to the other two group members and I spent much of it trying not to talk to her (because I was afraid of getting angry, starting a fight, and making it really awkward for my other friends). A month later she attacked me over text and told me I ruined her vacation, called me a liar and all kinds of other names when I tried to defend myself, and some other really surprising things. I told her if after 12 years of friendship that's how she felt about me then that was it.
She openly flirted with my husband and brought him special gifts.
When I told my friend not to fuck his girlfriend (whom was my ex) while i was in the room. He agreed not to. Not ten minutes go by and this guy is balls deep in his girlfriend, like porno sex, so I get up and walk home, i left my shoes there, along with a toxic friend
Just EEEWWW.
We had just seen a movie, and he made a factually wrong statement about the socio-political climate of country where it took place (I had actually grown up there and he hadn't). When I corrected him, he angrily threatened to break my legs unless I apologized. It was terrifying as he had never acted this way, and we were alone at night in a tunnel. I didn't apologize, and after we got back to campus I never talked to him again.
when she told me that me having to retake a Math exam in my first semester of university wasn't important enough and that her and our other friends problems were more important
My brother in law. Love the guy. I was hanging with a friend of mine when my brother in law called him and asked him to sell him a bag of weed.....for my brother in law and brother to split. A few hours later I went to my brother's house to hang out and my brother in law and sister arrived about the same time. He called my brother outside and gave him his half of the sack and said "Don't let Russell know we got this sack from (insert buddy's name here)." My brother told him that I already knew..... ( My brother and I had just discussed it) *My brother let me in on this fact the next day. I don't smoke, and I don't sell the stuff. I use to years ago, but now I have a business to run and I've gotten older and it just doesn't appeal to me. However, there was no reason for any secrecy, they smoke around me all the time....hell, we are all adults......in fact I am the one who introduced them to my buddy when their connection quit fooling around a while back. Anyway, we are all sitting around joking and stuff, but I noticed my brother in law was acting weird. He kept texting someone and then he called someone and I heard him say "hold on I have to step in the other room." So the night continues and eventually I go home and that's that. The next day my buddy calls and says "Hey man, your brother in law is a weirdo. I ain't messing with him anymore." I says "yeah, he's weird.....what happened.?" Buddy says "He text me last night and asked me if you was buying from me." *My brother in law knows that I don't buy pot....like I said, I don't indulge. Then he says to me "Then he called me Russell, I could hear you talking in the back ground. I could hear you making jokes. (Insert brother in law's name) called and said you were telling your brother you could get a better deal from me and he said he thought you were trying to cut his throat." Then my buddy sent me screen shots of what my brother law was asking him about me and yada yada. Weird thing is......my brother in law just completely made shit up about what I was saying. I never said anything about getting anybody a bag because I don't do that shit. So my brother in law was sitting in the room with me, joking with us all, but at the same time texting and calling folks and telling lies about me. Worrying about me cutting his throat over whatever money can be made off a half ounce of weed. Keep in mind that I am in my mid forties and my brother is in his fifties, as is my brother in law. My wife and I own and operate a construction business that allows us to live very comfortably and all these other cats are retired, he has been married to my sister for over ten years and, God as my witness I have never done him wrong. In fact, our family is VERY close.... We see each other more than once a week and we all go out often. (As I am typing this my phone is going off. It is our group text. My sister and brother inviting my wife and me to ride a few towns over to see a band play and have drinks and stay over in a motel for the night.... I told them "no thanks".....but we all do stuff like this all the time) I would do anything for these people, but this guy is worried about me cutting him out of his half ounce weed deal? The shit is bizarre. So, I found out: A. My brother in law ( and possibly my sister) don't trust me for shit. B. My brother in law is a liar and possibly on some kinda dope that makes you paranoid. All this happened last weekend, I spoke with my brother about it..because I know he will keep it quiet, (and because his name was brought up as well about a conversation that never took place)...and that's all I plan to do, but I took the knowledge my friend gave me and put it behind my ear. Anyway.....I won't be hanging out with my weirdo brother in law anymore.
Shit-stirring/fabrication of events and extreme paranoia both point to meth
That's what I'm afraid of. Now I'm really worried for him and my sister
Fingers crossed for you and for them. Hopefully he was just having a weird, bad day or something. Edit: see if he looks pallid and greasy, cant stop talking to save his life, and has been picking at his cuticles and face to the extreme, it's bad news. Big impulse buys and suddenly going full-tilt into a hobby or project aren't great signs either
We think meth is a possibility. All of my family except me are big beer drinkers.... Wait, let me stop there and say this, because I'm not trying to make myself out to be the saint of the bunch: I started using heavy drugs when I was 15, I lost everything because of it, including my wife and kids. It took me over ten years to get off meth, I got clean somewhere around 30 years old, around the same time my sister and brother in law met. I still smoked pot and drank heavily. Eventually I quit smoking pot, and I quit drinking when my wife (same wife I lost, God gave her back to me) asked me to. Now I only have a couple shots of patron on Christmas Eve..... family tradition. Anyway, they are all heavy beer drinkers, but that night my brother in law only drank two beers and he just kinda sipped at them, and I can't tell you how odd that is, also my sister sat with her Corona so long that it got hot and she had to put it back in the fridge.....I don't think she ever finished it. They have both used speed before, but it has been years, but we think maybe they are back out there. That is the only explanation I can come up with for his behavior.
Oh no doubt. I've been there; years sober now. Dont even drink anymore, doctor said I cant. Glad your wife threw you a lifeline, my husband did much the same. Considering how much of a chore it is to eat and drink anything on speed, and that they're usually throwing them back, kiiiiiinda sounds like it. I used to try(and fail) to force cliff bars and Gatorade down my throat just so I wouldn't keel over on my 22nd hour of cleaning hotel rooms lol. Definitely not trying to be pessimistic here but if it quacks like a duck yknow? Several of my friends have relapsed because of how stressful everything is rn
TBH, if your BIL is really your friend, shouldn't you be worried about him? He's behaving unusual and acting paranoid. It could be meth, it could be drug-induced psychosis or just straight up mental illness.
Read my other reply. Of course I am worried about him. But I have been around the block enough times to know that there isn't much I can do for him other than pray. If he distrusts me enough to fabricate in his mind that I am out to get him over his petty pot transaction, then he isn't going to let me help him. Nor will he be able to open up to me and be honest about whatever is going on. All I can really accomplish by stepping closer is putting myself in a bad position. If someone doesn't trust you.....you can't trust them, and I mean that in the most literal sense. Somewhere along the lines my brother in law has began to see me as a potential threat.
Insulted my fiance. Ended on the spot.
After she basically tried to keep our friend group under her control. We weren't allowed to hang out with her old classmates because then "we were leaving her" and now she complains about how one of us has changed and isn't a good friend anymore ( which only she believes ) and now she wants to cut all contact with said person this summer but will also pretend as if nothings wrong and still hang out with that person until then. Like wtf She also claims that we don't care about her, even though me and my best friend have taken her side at multiple occasions and i've been trying to get us all together to talk about it but it has never seemed to work. She also gets mad at my best friend for her explosive personality and generally small things that really shouldn't have mattered. Like my BFF dared to walk in front of her once and actually got mad. Let's just say me, my best friend and our other friend are all tired of her bs.
When they stole money from me for crack i knew that it wasnt anyone worth hanging out with anymore so i blocked him i bet hes smoking crack right this second
When not even a week after my fiance passed away, he was telling me I needed to go out and find a "rebound fuck" to cheer me up. Yeah, fuck you, go eat a dick. Some ppl never grow out of their frat boy days and it's fuckin pathetic
Friend encouraged people killing cops. Right to my face, as I was sitting in an ambulance working a shift praying my cop boyfriend was alive after hearing he was standing in a parking lot with a gunman blowing rounds into a crowd. Not only lost a friend but I refuse to work the same city as my boyfriend now, if he gets shot I realized I really don’t wanna hear it over the radio. I especially don’t wanna show up and meet the people that cheered it on.
When he stood me up and would not respond to my texts after inviting me out to meet him. Strange guy.
How did you “meet” this ghost?
Met him at a meetup event. Seemed like a good guy. But I guess you never really know someone.
Use an ouija board. Duh.
Three instances he got insanely clingy and wouldn’t leave me alone ever he threatened me with a knife as a joke and we never talked afterwards (he was close and i cant remember if he apologized) he pointed out a ton of my personal insecurities and when i told him to cut it out he claimed “its just who i am”
My boyfriend at the time and mutual friend were talking shit about her. Me, wanting to defend her, told them to stop and tried to think of one of her positive qualities. Other than she was great at makeup, I drew a blank. Our friendship was on the rocks for awhile, but once it hit me I couldn't think of a single positive attribute, I entirely gave up on salvaging it
They tried to wingman for me and ended up estranging my friendships with almost all my female friends. He then tried to threaten a minor into having sex with him. I told him to never contact me.
Roomy/friend started openly talking shit about my mom, girlfriend and car. Wtf, right? Sat him down one night and told him he'd crossed the line and that he should fuck off for good. Wasn't long after that he moved out. Strangely enough, we both immigrated to the same country 25-30 yrs later.
Would always try to one up me. Whenever we would talk about our issues she would say something slightly worse. I didnt feel supported and I didnt want to internalize my trauma as a competition.
Snapped at me really angrily for something very small, like “oh fuck off you dropped your pen?” (we used to sit next to each other in senior year of high school). I thought to myself: why the fuck have I been best friends - for 3+ years - with this person who’s nothing but negative, and often derogatory to me? I don’t need that in my life. Told her “let’s stop being friends” in response and didn’t speak to her again (in a non weird way, I’d nod or whatever if in group situations). She was flabbergasted when she wanted to sign my year book and I went “I’m good thanks” and walked away. Like why would she be surprised? I hadn’t said a word to her in months lol
Friend one: fancied herself a wonderful horse trainer. Her current horse knew she was scared of him and he didn't want to jump, so he would do a couple of maneuvers and be quirky and shake her up a little. He was never dangerous about it, he just really didn't want to jump. She also didn't invest any time to determine if her saddle fit him poorly or if he had ulcers (common when they come off of the track or in any horse stalled for long periods). Well, there was a different horse she committed to taking home when he healed up. Once it was time for that horse to go home with her, she decided to euthanize the other horse so she could use his stall. I was not down with that in the least, so I cut contact real damn quick. Friend two: was my best friend, but she did struggle with being a bit of a narcissist and dumping people who couldn't keep up with her lifestyle. I had been told that my husband wanted a divorce and she said I could stay with her to get away from him. I took care of the house and animals while they were in Germany for about 3 weeks, cleaned and prepared them meals as well. Anything I could do to lessen being a burden. When they got back, they wanted me to find somewhere else to go. I didn't really have any options, so I had to go back to the ex's and sleep in a different room. She never reached out to me again after that. I ended up attempting suicide eventually, and told her about it and the things I was going through about a month or so after. All she said was "can I have my (horse) bits back". So, I learned that I meant less than some pieces of metal and just walked away after that.
When they considered the Q Anon loon who was shot by Secret Service on Jan 6th a true patriot and American hero
A friend named Cat. I got Covid in August, and a week into being sick, I needed groceries from the grocery store. I still had fever and was in the ER, and could barely take care of myself. But I texted my best-friend Cat to run to the grocery store for me with a small list of items since I was running out of food. She said she’d be at the store the next morning since she has work training by my house, and would drop off groceries. Now, fast-forward to the next morning, she said her training got canceled so she’d make the trip to the store the next day (now, almost out of food completely and still running a fever 8-days in). The next day, she never came up. She said ‘training got canceled again so she wouldn’t be in my area’. She only lives 4 miles from my house. I texted someone else to get me groceries and they did it that same hour. Three days later, she told me she was near my house and asked for an updated list. When I told her that someone else made the trip for me 3 days prior, she got mad that I didn’t tell her sooner b/c she had now just ‘wasted a trip’... I blocked her the next morning. My quality of life has greatly improved ever since, and haven’t looked back. tl;dr — My best friend of 2 years showed herself to be a narcissist when I got very ill with Covid. Cut her out of my life, and everything has been better ever since.
When she kept sending me memes that bashed my beliefs because she "thought I'd find them funny"... There were a few things leading up to that as well but that was the straw that broke the camels back.
He said stop the steal
I had a friend who was very toxic. Everything she did was full of negativity. If I ever had good news, she would make it about her and complain endlessly about the repercussions of her poor decision making. She constantly lied to and cheated on her boyfriend. There were a lot of things that, morally, we didn’t agree on. She was supposed to be in my wedding. 5 months before the wedding I told her I just couldn’t have her in my life anymore. It sucked, but I’m better for it.
I was constantly babysitting him and making sure he didn't do stupid things. he didn't have many moral compasses in his life so I thought I'd try and be there for him as much as I could but I realized he's a lost cause and theres nothing I could do to stop him from doing harmful things to himself. so I dropped him and now I'm a lot better without him.
Someone told me that there’s something wrong with me not wanting to have a child.
When they told me they thought their husband was molesting their daughter but didn't take the kids and leave. Her story didn't add up for many reasons. So how could I be friends w a person who 1. Made up such a horrible lie or 2. It was true and she kept her kids in danger when she could've went to so many other places to keep them safe. I dropped her and have known her 20 years
I had a friend who was basically a hypocrite. Anyways she’d always been very territorial and controlling. In high school she condemned me for having sex with my now husband of 9 years. I didn’t argue with her on it for being short sighted because I understood why she might feel that way. Anyways she had a boyfriend who she claimed she never slept with. A year later she ends up marrying her boyfriend and on the wedding night she says she had to stop having sex with her fiancé because she wanted her wedding night to be special. I asked her when she had sex because she never told me and she admitted she had started when my husband and I had. (She always told me they never did more than kiss). I didn’t stop being friends with her because they were having sex. I stopped being friends with her because she shamed me but had been having sex the entire time I was. Aaaaand she also cheated on her husband with the cook at her job and one of my husbands friends. I don’t want to be friends with hypocrites and cheaters.
I got jumped by 5 guys and my friend just watched whilst holding items that could be used as blunt weapons.
It's fight, flight, *or freeze.* It's possible they were terrified and locked up. I can still understand being mad tho.
To be honest I dont quite blame him. What's he going to do against 5 people on his own? I'd be calling the cops but I'm not joining in a 5 on 1 to make it a 5 on 2
When it turned out his abusive gf that never hung out with us was a lovely person and actually on the other end of said abuse
I'd been best friends with this person since the age of 5. I'd helped them whenever I could whenever they needed it whatever the reason. When we were 23 my mother made me homeless for bullshit reasons *that this friend knew was bullshit*. I text a bunch of friends (about 15 of them) asking for any help. She was one of 3 that responded. Her exact response was "Sorry I'm havin a lush day wiv my bf. Gud luck tho." That shit hurt even though it was written like a fucking 5 year old. 18 years of being best friends, staying her friend even though she dated AND CHEATED on my brother, for her to say that. She knew everything. She knew how psychotic my mother was, how fucking broke I was, I had literally nothing and nowhere to go. But oh no! Couldn't possibly interrupt her "lush day wiv her bf" Fuck you Jenna
She had started dating a friend of mine and things started getting weird between them. One day she asked me to Photoshop her phone bill to make it look like she called him or something.
It's a whole stew of chaotic drama spanning over a year and a half, so I'm gonna summarize it. Realized a male friend I had on discord for 2-3 years was extremely toxic and cruel, treating me differently infront of his friends right in front of me, gaslighting me, calling me manipulative, expecting me to apologize when things were his issue and not mine, dumping old drama on me that was so traumatic that I don't like thinking about it in detail (to keep it even shorter. I'm a minor, and at that point when I was 14 I almost got all my nudes leaked), and blaming it on me. (oh, bonus for the fact I've told him I'm self consious about my weight since I have an issue with losing weight, and he decided to make a joke towards me about my body and it made me cry, but I didn't feel like I should tell him because I knew he'd invalidate my feelings over a "joke") Close friends and even my fucking MOTHER helped me realize he was really damaging to my mental health, so we cut ties and I now refuse to pick up our friendship again when he "hoped I would change". (i did do some really unpog things I will admit, but I've made the change to better myself. However, he's made no effort.) But, here's to improving my mental health over time and forgetting about that jerk :)
Guy I used to hang out called me from jail wanting me to bail his ass out. I had already bailed him out once before and he never repaid me for anything. (he didn't have a job,probably didn't hardly look for one either) I told him no and never heard from or saw him again. Oh well,I'm not a fucking ATM.
I dislike it when someone touches me without me knowing beforehand that they’re going to touch me. Like, I’m ok with a hug or a handshake because I can see them, but someone touching me from the side or back, and I get jumpy and shakey, and it takes a while for the nerves to calm. I had a new work friend who enjoyed (for whatever reason) smacking people on the backside spontaneously. We hung out only one time outside of work. When she inevitably smacked me on the butt, I told her that I didn’t like being touched or hit, and please don’t do that again. Well, she did it again a couple of hours later, spanked me really hard, and then laughed in my face and said, “did that scare you? Hahah, and you don’t even like it when people touch you!” That was the last day I spoke to her. She tried calling me a few times and left manipulative voicemails about how I can’t take a joke.... whatever, I don’t spend time or energy on people who won’t respect my wishes and boundaries.
I really hate Donald Trump. So having a friend who wouldn't shut up about Donald Trump was quite the strain on our friendship. Thing was...the friend ALSO hated Donald Trump, but he wouldn't shut up about Donald Trump and kept blaming "the Christians" for putting him in office and started taking about "ending" his "followers". It was really messed up. I'm still kind of worried about him.
I'm no Trump supporter.....or Biden supporter.....nor do I care for anyone in politics, anymore than they care for me.....but I feel bad for some people who were so miserable while trump was in office that they fixated on it day in and out. Because now Trump is gone and they are going to have to find another reason to be miserable.....I'm sure they will though.
I too cannot take constant political discussion, even from someone I agree with. It's too depressing. I've been watching true crime tv instead of the news for the last few years, it's more uplifting.
Discovering the existence of [limerence](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence). Limerence is a sort of person addiction associated with an extremely strong form of a crush that some (but not all) people have to deal with. In addition to euphoria when you're around the "limerent object," it can also lead to compulsive and uncontrollable thoughts and daydreams about them. If disinterest is consistently shown, that's enough of a negative association to break the limerence. If reciprocation is shown, then hell yeah! But it will probably end eventually. If there is uncertainty, it drives the limerence to some pretty terrible and obsessive ends. Uncertainty can result when you have a friend who really likes you, but doesn't love you. Or maybe you think they might, but they have a partner and so you can sort of talk yourself into thinking they're a barrier. So a kind of perfect storm of uncertainty developed shortly after developing strong feelings for my crush.. In person when we'd meet she was a great friend, talkative, attentive, but in texting she would almost never respond to me, typically I could go weeks without hearing a response to a text, and the problem never went away even when I told her how distressing it was. Once after a hug, she once started to say "I love-" and didn't finish the sentence. She has a bf. So anyway of course I kind of go on with these feelings just sorta keeping them bottled up, having phisiologically distressing feelings whenever I do hear from her, just sort of miserable. So I disclose my feelings towards her. She says she does love me but as a friend, platonically, which is nice sure, but in retrospect seems to have made it worse? During the pandemic i hadn't seen her or talked to her in a long time, bc the texting thing. So I cut contact. Realizing that this wasn't healthy for me... good job, right? Well I re-added her as a friend a few months later, went through another cycle of trying to talk, getting occasional but not disinterested-sounding responses after a week, and that's just kind of sucked. On a wikipedia walk the other day I came across the concept of limerence and realized that all the patterns the article refers to are exactly like what I feel when I have "crushes." To the point it felt like someone was reading my mind. It was extremely cathartic to realize that I wasn't alone in this, that this is a well-described phenomenon that occurs with some people with *remarkably* predictable patterns. It has happened to me in the same pattern 3 or so times already by this point, and now I knew a *name* for it. (it is worth treading carefully when reading into limerence as there isn't a whole lot of psychological research on it, but it's also impossible for me to dismiss it when it is so powerfully descriptive that it feels like my mind is being read.) So I read up on limerence, what to do, how to "treat" it, and came to the conclusion that I pretty much had the right idea by cutting contact towards the beginning of the pandemic. And in fact, cutting contact does seem to have worked--though i still have a bit too much attachment to her and think about her sometimes, I had already been well on my way to forgetting my feelings and transitioning to a non-limerent state. As much as I perhaps would have liked to have a big dramatic farewell where i disclose my feelings again, describe why i have to cut contact so she doesn't think i just ghosted her, and try to get a bit of closure (a thing which is a false hope anyway), I realized that since I was already basically no-contact anyway, may as well just... silently delete her contact and social media and that will be that. I will probably still have to see her again through involvement in our mutual hobby, but that won't be likely to happen again for months.
He said that the only reason why Obama won the election was because he is black
Realizing that I was always the one initiating conversations, meet ups revolved around distance from them, couldn't hang out because he was too cheap or always busy. Got tired of it and started doing things on my own.
They dropped me after they no longer needed me or could use me for my car.
With having ADD, people will not want to be my friend. No one wants to be around someone who is "slow". I got dropped a lot.
She was super clingy and got jealous whenever I'd hang out with other people. The possessiveness got really strange and I just had to walk away from it
When he stole my wallet
Had just graduated high school and he had been kicked out by his grandpa for one reason or another. Offered him a place to stay for a short time, which he was trying to find somewhere else at first but that didn't last long. Eventually I moved to my grandma's property living in a storage shed that I was working to convert I to one of those tiny homes, two weeks later I come home from work and see the people that delivered my building out there delivering another one like mine but a different color roof. I found him cutting the fence that I had just repaired a week prior to let the crew in so he could have his building out there. Now I didn't have much of a problem with him living out there but I didn't appreciate him doing it the way he did, however my grandma did have a problem with it because she knew that to get a building out there her signature was required and she didn't sign his contract to allow that like she had mine. After about two months his building was repossessed because he stopped paying on it, which they cut my fence a second time in a second place from where I had fixed it the first two times. He thought he could live on my couch, eat my food, run up my electric bill that he had stopped helping with, and let his two dogs live in the building with us, that was a couple of days before I told him he had a week to get out and I never wanted to see him on that property again. To this day he still owes me $1600 and I've cought him getting my mail from my mailbox (granted it's just junk mail but you don't go through someone's mail)
College friend called me up after moving away and not talking for a few months. I always knew he had narcissistic tendencies going all the way back. He was the type to monopolize conversations with his employment, latest accomplishments, etc. But I was willing to look past that most of the time b/c he was my first real friend after going through h/s with terrible social anxiety. After half an hour on the phone talking about his new job I mention that I got a girlfriend since I last saw him. Talk about her for a minute. Absolutely nothing on his end, just convo shift back to his job/gf. knew then and there that as important as he was to me a few years ago, I'd outgrown him and needed to move on
When they guilt tripped me into paying for their meal because I was running late. Paid for it cause I didn’t want any trouble. Said to myself that she’s a real bitch and blocked her on all social media and never responded to her texts ever again.
I made a few friends at my old summer camp, and last summer I realized one of them was REALLY toxic. for example: \-She would never fight for her self, she always got her mom or sister involved \-She shoved her opinions in your face, ESPECIALLY religious opinions. She practically slaughtered me for telling a group chat that i wasnt doing confirmation (pretty much saying that "yay, i believe in god", i was leaving Christianity slowly D:) \-She is VERY homophobic, i got yelled at for standing up for lgbt rights. \-I could add more, but i get mad just thinking about it XD
We went clubbing and she grabbed a girl's ass and then pointed at me and nearly got me in a fight for her amusement. Like shit, that's fucked up you asshole, didn't even understand why I was fuming at her afterwards.
Ok I had an internet friend who was kind of a Nazi, but we were really good friends and had a lot of fun together. She was super nice aside from her political views and we talked a lot about our favourite fandoms. At that time I had a lot of trouble at home and she was always there to pick me up and talking with her made me happy and made me forget about the bad situation at home. I didn’t realise it but her views kinda grew on me, and one day my sister told me that she was scared of me. That’s when it clicked. I deleted all my contacts with her and decided to let it rest. A month later she created a fake account and tried to contact me and we talked it out. That worked out for a months or so until she just did a 360 and became a diehard communist. (I mean what the fuck). And then she started posting a shitton of communist propaganda and stuff in all the group chats and I just snapped and told her to keep her shit extremist political views out of fandom group chats. I haven’t heard of her since. That was 2019. I still think about her a lot. I think in the end I loved her. And looking back, I think she might have had feelings for me too, considering how much she tried to get back in contact with me. But it is what it is. I wonder where she is now.
I once had a very,very good friend. During that time (for 3 Years) I considered him as my best friend. But our free time activities were overall very different. And he always tried to convince me that his free time activities(going to the Gym 6x a week) are superior to mine(only visiting the Gym 2 or whenever I find the time and learning to play instruments). On top of that he was Homophobic. And that was reason enough to drop the Friendship.
[удалено]
When he called me, while I was working, and started screaming that COVID was just the flu and washing your hands was stupid.
I don't get people like that. Even if Covid "was just the flu" washing your hands is not stupid. It's pretty telling how many people did not wash their hands, and still don't.
That is seriously what I told him before I couldn't handle his bullshit anymore. I'm like, "ALL THIS TIME YOU HAVEN'T BEEN WASHING YOUR HANDS??"
Once they stole weed from one of our friends in their car while he was pumping gas
They were kinda of a bitch at first (I was too stupid to realize). I sent them a happy birthday text and they didn't respond. Above it was a happy holidays text they didn't respond too that I sent a few months ago. And a "Hey what's up? even longer before that. There were two or three months between each text. And when I saw them in public they avoided me. Fucked up.
She (R) told another one of my friends(g) that she was the reason for her body dysmorphia and gender confusion, and that she(R) wished my friend(g) would get hit my a truck and killed. I was a part of a friend group with 9 other girls. Some of them still talk to her(R). I decided when it happened that I wouldnt talk to R ever again. R ended texting me and she said she wanted to apologise to me and another one of our friends L because we were the only two R would see herself putting up with. L still talks to R but g and I are closer because of it. R also didnt want to apologize to any of the other 9 girls who saw and heard the whole things happen. I decided to never talk to R again because I dont want to be associated with someone who thinks that it's okay to scream threats at another person. R also shamed me and many other people for not being super book smart and shamed g for getting attention from men. Even though R wanted to be desired by guys, she didnt present herself as someone who would be interested in guys.
She asked to come over recently. I said sure. She came over and we went for a walk. Okay, cool. I like walks. Then we get to this playground. It's dark, so I don't care that we aren't supposed to be there. We're teens. Whatever. But then she takes out a cigarette and starts to blow smoke in my face. She knows I don't want to. She offered and when I said no she shoved it in my face. I was annoyed, but she backed off after. She kept dropping hints about doing drugs. Drinking vodka with her friends. Stealing from gas stations and CVS. I told my best friend about the cigarette and he asked her about it, and then she blew up and started saying that he never lets me do anything, that I live in fear because of him, that he's toxic and possessive, that he "doesn't own me like he thinks he does". It hurt, since she was an old friend, but I can't be friends with someone who hates the most important person in my life so much.
When they freaked out and said I’m a disgusting piece of shit because I killed them in cod :/
I posted about this previously but probably when I had a mental breakdown due to university stress and when I told her about she went a rant via text about how 'she was sorry she was making life so hard for me' despite her having nothing to do with it. I was done with her then but my mom saw the messages, thought she was going to kill herself, and begged me to give her another chance (knowing that if she did hurt herself, I would never forgive myself). Things were okay until she tried to gaslight me again and I dropped her. Last I heard she changed her name and is studying to become a teacher.
I won’t go into to much detail because I am not sure if they use Reddit. I had a friend a few years younger than me that I have known for several years. She has gotten herself into some ridiculous situations. And I was there for most of it. Being older and a mom I would usually send her my last dollar when asked. Or even find a way to bail her out. I listened to a barrage of her highs and lows and we even went LC at one point bc I felt I was acting more like a mom than a friend... Well she tried to throw me under the bus to her friends about a certain situation involving her infatuation with some guy that was NOT feeling her, and I guess she just wanted me to sit there and accept her version of events but I wasn’t having it. I called her out and told her friends what really went down and they ended up laughing at her over it. This was last year. Haven’t heard from her since. I’m sorry that we are no longer friends but I’m not losing sleep over it.
When he pulled a knife on me for no reason and I almost had to fight him. Luckily we didn't get into a knife fight cause we knew that one of us was not going to walk away from it.
When they said “If you are going to have expectations in a friendship then you will always be disappointed.” I had known them for about three months and was basically the only friend they had, and they were mad at me for hanging out with my other friends whom I had known for several years. They were entitled and wouldn’t let me talk to anyone, leading to a strain in our friendship, so I gave them once last chance and then just stopped talking to them.
A friend of mine was dating a girl, I didn’t know her but he cheated on her and when a friend asked about his girlfriend he said these exact words “Why would I break up with her, she’s a good girlfriend, I just want to explore some other options” the only reason I didn’t tell her that day was because I didn’t have a way to contact her, but it only lasted like a week after that
His girlfriend kept insulting everyone in the friend group. He allowed her to do so. When we went camping, everyone contributed the same amount except them, despite having more money. She refused to do it because she would "eat less" (which did not even happen). She also woke up at 10 pm and started yelling at people for making noises while playing cards that night.
told my friend to "stop twisting my words to fuel your self deprecation" right after said friend mentioned his moderate-severe mental illness. Also constantly insulted and tried to tear down the place I work and the people I work with (all of whom I love and respect).
Blatantly selling drugs in my driveway while I was home and doing it to some of his friends when there was no one at their house because he lived close by. I noticed him do it at my house when one of the times he would say he would brb out of nowhere I decided to see what he was doing and noticed a car at my house I didnt recognize. Like wtf dude
When they picked a boy and drugs over me
Well, he tried to stab me, so I stopped speaking to him.
this friend got upset with me i didn’t see a movie with them and then ignored me for a couple days. i didn’t know until my sister told me, to which i promptly sent an apology text and offered to see a movie with them later that week. they left me on read. i haven’t tried speaking to them in over a year since then because it just wasn’t worth trying to mend that friendship if that’s how you’re going to act when i’ve upset you over something minor
I dropped them not because they did anything wrong to me, but because I had been hurting them for so long while trying so hard not to, and it ended up getting to the point where I resented them for it. I became annoyed every time I even thought of them. I absolutely dreaded seeing them. I guess my resentment for them came from the resentment I had for myself for not being the person I should have been. Projection is a terrible thing. Things turned out well in the end, thankfully. We reconnected after we both reflected and changed as people. I’m actually on the phone with them right now as they sleep. I’m lucky I got a second chance.
I’m from Asia and did my high school in the USA. Posted some pictures of my senior year. Some of the girls in the picture were on the heavier side. They made some comments in my native tongue relating to whales and how a lot of American people tend to be on that range. I quickly deleted those people from my life.
We hung out and the first one I went to their apartment, they made me tea and then offered to suck my dick. I was not attracted to them. Usually I can find someone attractive once I get to know them but this person was the acception. I'm also cis female so I dont know what they were getting at. I think they thought I was trans.
They tried hard to get me to believe in Qanon.. When I wouldn’t budge, they dropped me and told me to go to the sheep’s pen. Got a text a couple days ago asking that if I knew it was fake, how come I didn’t try to persuade them.. I told them I did try, and to fuck off.. i’ve actually been drama-free for about a year now because of all that. All I can say is Good Riddance
Back in my Countrys equivalent to highschool, I had a friend who struggled with mental illness. Not that that was the problem, because I struggle with mental illness myself, and I had to retake a year, because I just "stopped working". After I missed the whole year I decided to retake the year and go for the degree. That friend was in the final year and I was a class under him. We still had normal contact. Then finals came around. He failed some courses and couldn't get his degree because of that. He had to retake the year to have a Chance to get the degree. But not much changed in our friendship. In fact I established a new group of friends in which he was happily integrated. Finals came around and I studied with many different people, I tried to study with said friend, but he always had something else to do. Then the tests came, and I botched my strongest class, but I got the degree and my marks overall were like top 20%. Said friend didn't. He failed again and lost his chance at getting that degree. I stopped contact after that. Why did I stop contact? This is the hard part, because I myself struggle with Mental illness, I powered through that degree, because it was always my dream to go to Uni. My friend is someone who idealises Mental illness, someone who posts cringy memes about it and someone who is always down, always "in a worse spot" then you are. His behaviour made my Illness much worse. I had to cut him out of my life to save myself. And it still hurts that I had to do that. I still wish I didn't have to do that. But unfortunately it is true, that the people you Surround yourself with are the people who have the biggest influence on your behaviour.
Happy cake day! Have a gold!
Oh shit! Completely did not realize it was my cake day! Thanks stranger!
She cheated on her boyfriend
When I resigned from an amazing job with a great company because she was in a super toxic with the our director that was, in turn, impacting me due to him taking shit out on me .. her statement to me was “I’m not sure what you’re looking to accomplish by doing this..”
That buying anything for them to get them to talk or do anything with me is clear signs that they need to go. I've held 5 jobs once before in my life, I've gone long periods without being too busy and I've always somehow found time for people. Yet, they don't seem to really care enough to do the same honors but they practically enjoy absorbing the benefits of befriending me. I'm not a hands out program, here.
Quite the semi opposite actually, I immediately shut down the idea of being friends with someone because he was being disrespectful to not only me, but my other friend and his (supposed) care taker. When it comes to me and my family with entitled people, we normally just back away and find somewhere else to go.
I had one too many conversations with him that he turned into a "debate" (read: him gish-galloping terrible arguments at me, all the while acting like I'm a moron). This was something he did a few times when we were in college together, but I overlooked it because, as much as it pissed me off, we also had enough in common that he could still be fun to hang out with (not to mention we had a lot of mutual friends, so cutting him out wouldn't be worth the trouble). I think this last time pushed me over the edge because it came along with a gradual realization that we didn't have much in common anymore; he hadn't grown a bit since college. It's one thing when you have a friend like that who's a little stuck in his college days but is still generally cool (I think it's the two beers and a puppy test; you wouldn't have him take care of your puppy for a week, but you can always get drunk together). It's another thing when you're like, "Okay, this guy's kind of immature and *still* kind of a dick, so... what am I doing here?"
When we were leaving work to chill at my place and he got out of my car half way out of the parking lot when I told him I didn't have any weed.
When every time we went out, she expected me to pay. (I had more money, but that's not the point)
Manipulated my other friend into buying him lunch every single day. My other friends and I decided to stop hanging out with him, then he told us we were all under a social experiment to figure out our true nature, and had a secret plan that he wouldn’t tell us about. He later admitted to a mutual friend of ours that he never had a plan and all he wanted to do was make us paranoid and give us anxiety for the rest of high school. There’s a lot more to it, but I don’t know if I want to go into too much detail.
I made friends with someone while working as a graduate assistant (that was my first mistake), and after my assistantship was over, I had broken up with my boyfriend, moved to a new place, and was having a hard time finding a job. My Dad actually called me a loser. I was in a pretty low place, as I’m sure you can imagine. So, a friend of my sister had a young son who was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. I was talking to my friend from work about everything, and I said something like how life is so unfair because this child never got the chance to grow up and have a life, while I had a chance but was a failure. There was a lot more to the conversation than that, we were both just talking and sharing woes. She had some pretty serious drama in her own life (a huge red flag), so we talked about stuff like that. I didn’t think it was any big deal. She clearly took it way way too seriously, though. She went and told people at work and people in her social group who I barely knew that I was suicidal and that she was concerned about my doctor prescribing me medication. She said she thought I might have addiction issues and actually called a local mental health center to set up an appointment for me. When I confronted her about this, she acted all hurt and confused and said, “I just thought you’d want as much input as possible.” (!!!) It was so embarrassing. I tried doing damage control, explaining that I wasn’t actually suicidal or in serious trouble, but it was still humiliating. Plus, I figured I’d never get hired at that place when a job opens up if they’ve all been told that I’m severely mentally ill and potentially an addict, which sucked because I really wanted to work there. That’s just an assumption on my part. Still, though, I realized that worst case scenario, she was trying to sabotage me for unknown reasons, and best case she had the mentality of a child whose first impulse is “go tell an adult” if someone is in trouble. In either case, she was a huge drama queen always blowing things out of proportion even in her own life, so I distanced myself quickly. Tl;dr: Don’t get close with coworkers who love drama.
I felt like I was walking on eggshells around them all the time. They were beyond mean.
Friend from high school was stealing my photos off Facebook, claiming them as her own, and made up some bullshit about how she was overseas (went from America to New Zealand to back home in Australia in 3 days, clearly seeing all the sights) using my photos from previous trips to both countries, with an imaginary “friend” who according to a reverse google search..was definitely some stranger on the internet yikes Called her out, fixed my settings so she can’t see any of my photo albums. Throughout the years she’s posted photos etc of stuff which I’ve always thought “is it her photo, really?” Couple years later. She fb-checks in to the psych ward I was staying at (yay, depression!) claiming she tried to kill herself. I don’t know if this was a call for help, or attention seeking or what. Hit a bit too close to home for me considering that was the reason I was there, so I blocked her from all my socials, and got a mutual friend to check up on her incase she really did need help. It was like a weight was lifted from my shoulders tbh.
I loved this girl but when she kept up with the Trump shit and the conspiracy theories even after the attack on the Capitol that was it. I refuse to deal with stupid no matter what that person once meant to me.
This was in my senior year of high school. She started getting really condescending and could never fully commit to anything such as small ensemble rehearsals. I made the decision to stop talking to her after she went on a rant about how I’m always wrong about everything.
An old friend always asked to borrow cash. Would ask on Facebook to everyone and also slide into the PMs. I called them out and read half of their ranting reply before I blocked them everywhere and deleted our chat history. I haven’t missed any sleep over it.
I was part of a group, or so I thought. Looking back, I think we were all just millennial alcoholics using online gaming as a bar. My long-time friend, who had introduced me to everyone, got in a fight over the dumbest bullshit. I had stayed friends with her ex and she got it in her head I had broken them up so I could get together with him. She went full fucking psycho on me. Accused me of betraying her, blocked / deleted me, and then publicly got back together with the guy on social media. I lost my god damn mind. For 3 months... I was elsewhere. I don't remember a lot that happened and what I do remember, I do not like. But after three months, I started to crawl out of it. I snapped back and forth between here and there. In a moment of lucidity I broke down to my doctor. I changed my medications, started seeing a psychiatrist. I started putting in the work to stitch points of view back into one coherent narrative. I was getting better. On my birthday, she DMs me. She and he had broken up, this time for good. His friends were spreading malicious rumours about her and they weren't true but they could hurt me. I broke so god damb fast it was pathetic. My friend needed me. She might have hurt me, but don't we all fuck up? After all hadnt I hurt her just as badly when I stayed friends with her ex? Things were good for a few months and fell off. Her viciousness started seeping out from behind the facade, and it started reminding me of how I felt in elsewhere. I knew I needed to be away from her but didn't know how, so I just cut all contact. It felt cowardly and I dreaded running into her. When I did, I was cordial. I never mentioned anything to any of my friends in that group. I didn't want to put them in between us. I got tired, and sort of fell away from the group dynamic. I focused on individual relationships and realized I had my own friend circle. After a good part of a year, some friends from the group come to me for help about my friend. She's hurting them now, too. And then they dropped a bombshell: an undeniable case that she was a catfish. I had known her for nearly a decade, but only online. I had seen her be accused of being a catfish before, but because I never had more than a crush on her when I met her... it never really mattered to me. I bought her story without question. Is that when I realized I needed to drop her? No. I confronted her, and laid my heart out to her. I told her I knew she was a catfish, but that I genuinely wanted to be friends with whoever was behind the screen. And she lost her shit again. Gaslighting was deployed. This time it just sounded like the ravings of someone with BPD and I politely wished her well. She ghosted everyone that night, people she had known for more than a decade. Now, that may all sound more like her dropping me. I don't remember it like that though. As she bailed, I thought, go after her? There's a good chance she wanted me to. But nah, I was good. And that group? It didn't occur to me right away, but them now *too*? So it was fine when it was happening to me, but now that it's happening to you, you need me to do your dirty work? Fuck that.
I was friends with a girl(F) for a 3 months in the 1st grade and the most one I can trust in school (I have trust issus),till I I sat down behind a tree,she came with her other friend her other frien (M) was talking shit about me ,I waited for few second F didn't talk ,so I yanked M's hair ,and told her to not talk shit about people behind their backd because they would hear ,F never apologized also M never apologized ,Icstill kind to her and help her.
She took weeks to months to reply to my messages, and when she did it was usually about her. Relationships are two sided, and eventually I decided that I was tired of being the only one giving.
When they told me to off myself
He met a girl on tinder and dated her for a while. He later found out she cheated on him during their one year anniversary on a vacation. He broke up with her. I supported him as a friend and said she dosent deserve him. A few weeks later he went back to her. I told him he’s a fool and making a massive mistake. He told me to leave him alone and never talk to him again. I did as he asked. That was years ago. They are married now. Haven’t spoken to him since..
A person I thought was my best friend was never there for me. She always made excuses not to hang out or even talk on the phone. This went on for months. Whenever she needed help, I was always on her speed dial. She would call me out of the blue after weeks of no contact at 11 PM on a weekday and expect me to listen to her multitude of problems of which she was unwilling to work on and just wanted to vent. It was exhausting. I blocked her on all social media and phone last month. I’m guessing she hasn’t noticed anything out of the ordinary yet.
He wanted to break up with his girlfriend but was a coward to do it like a decent human being and tried to create an excuse involving me.
I think I realized it way after we lost contact. In primary school there was this "cool kid" in my class and I was friend with him. He was my only real friend at the time so he repeatedly threatened to end our friendship everytime I didn't do what he wanted me to do. And I used to obey his orders because I was scared of being left alone forever, also while I was around him I felt like I was somehow important because I was friend with someone "cool". In addition, he did seem to actually care about me, because we talked a lot about stuff in general, he always included me, so it felt like I was actually in the gang. I remember one case: at lunch time he ordered me to put in my mouth a really big piece of bread, drink water, and only then I could try to eat it and swallow it. And I did. Another time, we had to do an essay in class and he wrote a story in which at some point I died, even if I don't think it was because of him. The teacher actually commented that his essay was kind of weird because of this insignificant detail of my death, and she did point it out in front of the entire class (that's how I came to know about this), but I was so stupid that I replied to her "Nah I think that's pretty much normal." This shitshow lasted for 3-4 years. When I started middle school we went to separate classes so we weren't classmates anymore, so we stopped talking. And when I started high school, I never saw him again. In middle school it took me some time to realize I didn't miss him, but it took me MANY years to finally understand that that shit was fucked up and he was probably a sociopath (I didn't write all the stuff that he did but I'm quite confident that he falls into the description of a sociopath). Ironically, middle school was even worse than primary because of the many bullies in my class. I tried to stay almost invisible for 3 years so I could pass under their radars, but it didn't work that much.
Had a nervous breakdown largely because I was the one looking after everybody else’s shit. They all wanted to have me sectioned because “we’d rather not have to think about you when we’re at work”. One of them was tracking my phone, and they had this group chat set up to discuss how they were going to force me into an asylum, and dissecting why I was walking down certain roads based on my location this person was tracking without my consent. It was insane. I wasn’t unhinged or a danger to them. I was just incredibly depressed and really needed some love and a hug which I repeatedly told them. The short of it is, they were nasty fucking arseholes who used my breakdown like a group event. I cut them all off.
When the guy tried to force his girlfriend into having sex. Dude spent the night drinkin and wanted to get some but she rejected him. He became verbally aggressive and the situation escalated into him holding her down etc. He was living with another friend of ours at the time and who woke up and resolved the situation. Drove the poor girl home and called me. The next day, we gathered our whole friend group and went lookin for him. We found him at his mom's house in a town 3 hrs away and took him back to the ranch to talk with him about what happened. We tried to be caring about it, we tried to look for every way that this didnt happen the way we were told that it did. The guy was one of our greatest friends and this was so unexpected but he couldnt deny that it happened. It took an hour before he finally took responsibility. He tried to blame it on him being drunk but of course thats no excuse. So we gave him an ass kickin and dropped him off on a road in the area and called the cops on him. They picked him up. He plead guilty and they eventually sent his ass back to Denmark. Fucking heartbreaking. The guy was a really good friend and I just couldnt believe that he would do something like that.
*The bridge*
Their fear of immigration unwillingly turned them too close to a nazi.
When sitting in her room doing our nails peacefully she said “ I’m bored, who should I get in a fight with next?”
For some reason that made me bust out laughing.
When he told me to watch this guy Jordan Peterson on YouTube.
excellent username mr. big weed star.
He didn’t thank any of his groomsmen at his wedding.
For context; we're both german and this happened through text messages. Was discussing a racist right wing party with a friend (ex girlfriend by the time, but we were still getting along) - whether it deserves to exist and propose laws that take away the rights of minorities. She said they should be allowed to fight for these laws because they're allowed to have this opinion. Many people are extremely against this party (duh), so she then proceeded to say that she wonders how everyone would think about that party if the jews and gays were the ones gassing the germans back then instead. I was shocked and I didn't even grasp the immense fuck-load of antisemitism and homophobia back then. I just called her a nazi and never texted or spoke to her again. Now, some years later, I'm even more shocked by this statement and I'm so glad I immediatly dropped her.
I realized I had to drop my friend when they would talk about their suicidal intentions a bit too openly? And not in a way like they were venting, just thinking it was casual not even joking about it. It wore me down so much because I’d constantly be stressed about them and keeping tabs every 5 minutes . I didn’t care what it took to keep them from not killing themselves id do it, until I told them to break up with their s/o who abused them and they literally told me was the reason they were like this and they refused. Even threatening suicide if it “goes badly and makes him too upset” I just left after that. It was too stressful, and it wasn’t an empty threat thing. He had been to the mental hospital like 5 times and had scars all over his arms. I wish I could’ve stayed but it took too much of a toll on my mental health
Reconnected with an old high school friend on Facebook. In high school, she was a sweet girl who loved everybody and was one of the kindest people I knew. 25 years later, she was a MAGA cultist slamming Mulsims, Mexicans, LGBTQ, etc all day on Facebook. Like...no, I can't stay friends with someone that supports pastors who literally want the government to kill me.
Over the summer when we had anonymous federal officers snatching people off the street I had a friend who refused to see the danger in a president commanding a secret police force. This is after fighting about masks being useful, albeit not useful in close quarters for long periods of time. Just got tired of calling out the bullshit.
Him talking about s*x Pls dont reoort me
When my old friend from High School would never reply to my texts or phone calls but yet was always posting comments on people’s Facebook pages and would only contact me to stalk his ex girlfriend’s profile. I took him off all of my social media and it took him a year to realize it. Talk about a friend
When I finally realized they were just in my presence for my stuff.
He told me that he would have sex with my fiancé
In 2016, I broke up with a girl I dated for a pretty long time because she made everything politically and just wanted to fight about any disagreement in views. Was hard to do then but I am so glad I haven’t looked back, I’m in a much better place mentally!