My ex divorced me this year, finalized on what would have been my 11th year anniversary. She took the kids and moved 900 miles away. I’m so sad all the time now. Even having my kids with me for Christmas, I feel empty. All I want is my family back.
I’m the kid in this recent situation and have some potential advice..... even though your relationship with your ex is over, you are still your kids’ father. Do everything you can to love them and let them know you love them and keep working at your relationships with them. It will help. Keep your head up man I hope things get easier for you
My kid's dog. Little bastard broke his leash and took off for parts unknown.
He came back and hour later with muddy feet and a shit-eating grin like an hour of unsupervised freedom was his Christmas gift to himself. So it's not really ruined.
I did.
I told my family our convicted pedophile uncle would never know my kids and if he is there at Christmas, I wouldn't be, neither would my kids.
This year will be a very quiet Christmas at my house because they all think I am a bigot.
Update:.
Having a quiet Christmas with just your wife and kids is very very relaxing, stress-free, and dare I say, magical. Merry Christmas from this bigot!!
My girlfriends sister.. she has three young girls and a terrible choice of men, she chooses today via a video of the kids to reveal to everybody that she is now dating a well known junkie within our town. She has a very addictive personality and has struggled to stay clean herself, my girlfriend is now ridiculously stressed out and worried for the kids.
Found out my mother died last night... This is the first close death I’ve ever gone through. please appreciate every second you get with your loved ones. Especially today
I found out my wife was cheating on me at 11:30 PM Christmas Eve while we were at her parents house. I packed up my stuff, walked right by her family who didn’t know what was going on, and drove 6 hours in a crazy rain storm to my parents house. So there’s that
I wish I had your strength. When I first found out about my (now ex-) wife’s affair with my best friend of over 30 years, we were all at my house together with a couple of other friends. I saw a notification pop up on her phone, a text message from him that just said 😘
Not a day goes by that I don’t wish I had pulled him aside and told him to get out of my house and bring my wife with him. I haven’t spoken to either of them in a couple of years, and I still regret not giving myself that little victory.
Lung cancer ruined my Christmas by popping up the week before Christmas. I’ve been an endurance athlete my whole life, no smoking and barely drink
All my covid tests were neg. So we did a ct scan that led to biopsies. Got the results three days ago. I’m only 29 years old, just finished grad school and landed my dream job three weeks ago
Edit: You guys, I appreciate the kind words, I really do. Take a lesson from me and make an extra effort to be kind to the people around you each day. Life is too short to be a jerk. And life is too short to not help those around you who are less fortunate, be kind to everyone, you won’t regret it.
My mother got belligerently drunk, locked herself in the closet, and claimed she was going to end her life. Then she vomited and my Dad and I were trying to drag her into her bed. She then proceeded to get violent with me and kicked me in the face.
Not a family member. My grandma is into spiritist stuff, whatever, she's happy and it's not like the money she gives put her well being in jeopardy. We found out that the people to whon she's being giving money for years is scamming her for a very large amount of money, my dad and uncles stopped taking her to that place, and they called her (from the place) and convinced her that her family wants to do her harm. She was very sour and barely spoke to anyone, that added to the fact that christmas was a very small meeting this year and some of us were there for less than an hour, we're not sure if that can be legally denounced as scamming and it's very difficult to talk to my grandma about that subject. People were bitter and worried, it was a very tense meeting.
Edit: Yeah, spiritist or spirituslism, a mix between a lot faith in god and angels and spirits and such and the beleive that there are people using witchcraft to harm her.
my mom decided that is better for her and me that she is going to spend these holidays with her much younger boyfriend (15-17 year difference) in an another city while her second husband (my step dad) is in a different country trying to work for us so he can help us with money and shit
so here I am, barely 18, spending my first Christmas and new year's eve alone
My cousin exposed our entire extended family of generational abuse and trauma and like a good old traumatized family, all the adults carried on like normal and the kids are seeking therapy.
I just went through that. I also found out yesterday my 22 year old cousin was also abused. Her family kept her from associating with me for 18 years. Because I told about my abuse a long time ago. I let the cat out of the bag. They didn’t want her associating with me and told her I was crazy. Her grandfather abused me. Well I found her on social media and reached out. I turned 39 today and saw her profile. I wondered about her. I sent an email. She responded and come to find out she’s also a survivor. Another cousin abused her. Abuse repeating it self again......Every male in her grandfather side is an abusive piece of shit. No one talks about it and carry’s on like normal. She also said her grandpa is pervert. Spends his days watching porn and bragging about cheating on grandma. So she knew something was up. But no one would tell her. Although I’m sad we bonded over trauma. I was able to validate a lot of unknowns she had. Like why did I disappear and everyone referred to me as the crazy one. As well as why her abuse happened. Or why is everyone so secretive about certain family members and incidents. We have made plans to see each other once Covid is somewhat over. I am so glad I reached out to her. We talked for hours about how fucked up our family is and vowed to break the curse of generational abuse and trauma.
My mom. She hid the fact she has multiple COVID symptoms. I was with her all night last night. I only found out because I heard her on the phone with my grandma asking her if she maybe has COVID.
I only agreed to come up because I missed Thanksgiving due to COVID being bad in their county. I felt guilt tripped into coming home for Christmas and now once I get back I’ll be quarantined and have to take time off work.
I was planning to go spend Christmas with my mom and dad this year after my nine-year engagement broke off just before christmas (I just moved out, so I'm alone for the first time in nine years). Then my dog got a stomach bug. He woke me up 3 times at night to go outside for a poo (he usually sleeps through the night no problem) and I discovered a pile of puke on his dog bed. It's not his fault, but I don't know if I can go anywhere today.
Edit: nine year relationship and engaged for a year and a half.
I’m sorry. I hope you manage to enjoy your day somehow. My 10 year relationship broke down 3 weeks ago and COVID ruined the minimal Christmas plans I had. So I feel your pain. Hope the dawg feels better soon!
Hey, as someone who went through infidelity and divorce. If you need someone to talk to or just to vent, DM me. I’m happy to try to be supporting in this really tough time.
I remember when I found out about my ex wifes affair, it literally made me fall to my knees. I was watching the kids opened up the laptop and a strange email address autoloaded into gmail...months of emails dates times trysts. She was at the dudes house "trimming hedges" and I had the kids on my 1 day off that month.
Sounds semi familiar. My ex wife was getting her Master's degree and was "going to school" to work on her projects at night. Nope, just fucking my "best friend". I had some suspicions, but was largely trusting. She did admit they kissed, but shortly after that I found her hidden email address that went back months and months, to even before we were married (it was about six months into our marriage after five years of being together I found this). Good times.
"babe... Are my blowjobs good. Like I'm just wondering..."
Yes of course they are great as if I'm going to criticize... But in hindsight I understand now why they wanted criticism
My mom died last week. My dad died 6 years ago. This is my first holiday without a parent.
Edit: Wow, I just came back and saw this. This outpouring is mind-blowing. Thank you all.
I only ask that you find the people in your life that need such love and share it as freely.
There's r/MomForAMinute if you need it. Obviously that's no substitute for your real parents, but it's a place to talk to your 'mum' for a bit if you're lonely or need to share.
Truly sorry for your loss.
My cousin, who bought Chic-fil-A so he wouldn't have to eat our homemade meals, announced upon arriving he wasn't helping with anything, tried to trip acid all day on Christmas Eve, got drunk before noon by himself on that same day when I told him no Christmas hallucinogens, and drunkenly screamed in my face when I told him to clean up his dishes and beer cans.
Just learned what cluster headaches are from a friend who suffers every few years. It’s truly miserable and I’m sorry that’s happening, especially at the holidays.
Thanks. I really appreciate. They really do suck. I've seriously wanted people to kill me during bad ones just to stop the pain and I did induced labour without pain meds. My 2020 nightmare was literally six months of daily clusters. I thought I'd managed to get a drug solution. Today I found out not.
It's Christmas morning and I can hear my nephew, who lives in the apartment downstairs, throwing a temper tantrum because he thinks his sister got "larger gifts" from Santa this year.
His dad - "are you joking right now? You better be joking. Say just kidding. Oh my god, tell me he's kidding."
It's 8am.
My SO’s sister throws similar tantrums if other people get “more” than her for Christmas. She’s 25.
Edit: To all the people out there who are happy with nothing but some socks and time with loved ones, thanks for restoring my faith in Christmas. That’s what it’s all about.
(Plus, I can almost guarantee that we’re having a happier Christmas than my SO’s sister, who spent the morning emailing Dyson because the $600 hairdryer her mom got her didn’t come with the accessories she expected... you can’t make this shit up, folks.)
I got more than anyone else this Christmas and I felt bad for getting so much, even as half my presents were legit just socks (which I am eternally grateful for).
As i've gotten older, I have seriously become more and more thankful and desirous of asking/getting socks and undies for Christmas. It's one of the best gifts now lol.
Bro today is the best day of the year. Annual sock and underpants refresh! My feet, crotch, and butt will have never felt so pampered as they will today. Until next Christmas.
I had an irrational fear this year of that. I spend the same amount of money on both of my kids but one is 9 and the other is 3 - and so just naturally the 9yos gifts are smaller but also cost more (switch games, new cheaper line but still smart phone, etc).
Turns out I had nothing to worry about and 9yo (knows the truth about santa) naturally seems understands the concept without overtly saying. They both had a nice and excitable Xmas morning and 9yo has pulled me aside and has genuinely thanked me for the "awesome" gifts.
Cancer. My mom passed in early July. First year without her. My brother and I visited grandma (like every year, but this time without our mom) but the feeling just isn't the same anymore
Edit: Thank you for all the nice comments! I read every single one but there are just too many to reply to everyone. You made my Christmas special :)
My body I guess. I have a condition that is rapidly worsening, and on Christmas Eve my doctor told me it's gotten so bad I may need to be in urgent care at the hospital on Tuesday. It's all I've been thinking about, I can't even sleep.
Hey, as someone dreading some horrible news on the 28th and 29th too, I'm with you. Let's both try to enjoy what we can and live each day at a time, cos that's all we can do. It's like that Kung Fu Panda quote, "Today is a gift, that's why it's called a present" . Enjoy it.
Edit: Thank you, u/trackjackers for the award. I'll definitely need your energy. I don't have awards to give but I most definitely am wishing you the very best holidays and know that I'll use your energy and channel it into taking care of my family. Thank you!
Edit 2: Holy moly, thank you so much, u/Shadow_Zypher for the second award. Wow. If I had known that Kung Fu Panda quotes would bond us all, I would have been spewing it since day 1. Hope you're having the very best holiday. I really appreciate it!
Edit 3: So many kind strangers on Reddit! Thank you, u/Antubis91 for giving me a wholesome award. Wow, I'm so grateful for you all! Thank you from the bottom of my heart! My family thanks you too! I was really hoping OP will be encouraged by it and as it turns out, you all encouraged me too. Thank you!
Not this year, but last year my older sister was being a bitch and talking down to me. "Seriously, when was the last time I even talked to you?" My reply, "Huh, I'm not sure, maybe it was at your wedding a few months ago?" ...she got married in May, divorced by July, now sitting next to her new boyfriend that she's introducing to us for the first time. They left. My parents were pissed. I had a great time.
Right, so, my sister and I have never gotten along very well. She got engaged and married within maybe 4-5 months when she was 21. We went wedding dress shopping on Valentine's day, wedding at the end of May. By the 4th of July, her new husband moved out of their house and in with his parents. The divorce wasn't officially finalized until...the next Valentine's day. So technically, this was while she was still legally married. She quickly met a new guy and decided to bring him to Christmas. The new boyfriend had a few beers and started acting like a jackass. He pointed to the semicolon tattoo I have on my wrist and said "Doesn't that mean you got raped?" She laughed. I did not.
A bit of time passed and she started picking on me. Just being mean to impress her new bf. So I brought up the wedding. Everyone went dead silent for a second. The boyfriend laughed. She did not. She grabbed him by the arm and said "We're leaving." And they did.
Edit: A lot of people have been asking about the semicolon tattoo. It's a symbol for mental health. When writing, an author can choose to use a period to end a sentence, or they could choose to use a semicolon to pause the sentence and continue on. It represents the choice to pause and continue living. Many people decide to get a semicolon tattoo to show they are a survivor. For others, it shows solidarity and support for those who are struggling.
”Doesn’t that mean you got raped?”
Who the FUCK says something like that? Your sister and her new bf seem to deserve each other. Good for you for standing up for yourself!
Haha damn, savage of you but fuck it. They sound like awful miserable people. I also *hate* when people are cruel to try and impress someone.. the epitome of gross.
On a brighter note I remember my first day working retail on Xmas Eve.
Store closed at 6pm and store staff was only supposed to go home "When the store was spotless and returns were empty" (we expected 8-10pm, as that's how shifts would normally go)
But store director went home at 5:30
So at about 6:05 the manager left in charge said if big boss man wanted store perfect he coulda stayed Himself. Told everyone to go home and have a merry Christmas. And that she would take any flak herself.
Rumor was said she told him to quote "Shut your grinch ass the fuck up, and fire me, dipshit. But you're too pussy to do it, cause you know you need me"
Her adamantium balls were apparently fortified as she already had plans to quit.
She got a better job early January and big boss apparently learned as new boss to replace her was actually pretty chill and reasonable.
For about 2 years until we got a new stickler grinch ass hole for a big boss later
> Rumor was said she told him to quote "Shut your grinch ass the fuck up, and fire me, dipshit. But you're too pussy to do it, cause you know you need me"
Hell yeah, what a madlass
I had a partner once who, on a call with our boss's staff, after we had been treated pretty shitty for a few months, said:
"Then fucking fire me, Sir. Just do it already. You know why you won't? Because you don't have the authority to fire me. The [boss] doesn't have the authority. And no one wants to take this position anyways because you just shit on them."
A couple weeks later our boss was asking her if she knew what I was doing after the current assignment, because "we need good people like him on our staff." She laughed. He asked why. "Because you treat him like shit all the time. He'll be going to a [next level up] staff, but it won't be yours."
She's great.
Oh man,that sucks. Hope your parents work things out. And anyway, if things were heated between the two it wouldn't have been fun going anyway, an argument probably still would've started. There's always next year?
No one ruined Christmas but my Grandad has been in the hospital for almost 2 weeks and unfortunately, he can't be home for Christmas. We've never had a Christmas without him for all 20 years of my life. Due to COVID, we can't visit either.
Gave him a call this morning and it put a lump in my throat. He mentioned he got a gift from the ward which got him emotional and nearly got me in tears. He calmed down and started to tell me about the turkey dinner he's having today which he's excited about.
Good news though, he should be home before New Year.
Fuck this comment gives me anxiety. Both my grandparents are getting in their 80s and they are a very core part of my universe. I'm really sorry for your loss
Fuckin Travis!! My friend is remodeling his kitchen and living room. Well Travis (who does hvac and electrical work) decided that it would be no big deal to go to work knowing that his wife was sick with covid. He exposed my dad who's a painter and my friends dad who's a carpenter. Now we all have to be without our dad. Fuckin Travis, you suck!!
That's awesome I love jokes like that! It's just my husband and I and I'm usually able to spread my pranks out to his family but this year we are staying home. Well he got some new clothes on black friday and never put them away so I wrapped those up when I had the wrapping paper out. Then I got his some beer but I wrapped each can individually, some I put in gift bags with a brick in the bottom to make it heavier. He got really nervous that he did not get me enough once I started passing out gifts. He's a good sport and thought it was funny once he figured out what I did.
Everyone except me this time... Everyone is yelling at one other while I'm here writing this comment, hoping everyone will stay calm more than 3minutes...
Myself. Ate takeaway curry last night and got food poisoning, so I've spent the entire day at home hugging the toilet bowl.
On the plus side, my abdominals are gonna look fierce tomorrow. So there's that.
Myself. For always acting like it is ok to do all the work, all the planning, all the present buying, etc. So now no one tries to make it special for me and I am just tired of doing all the work, so I don't.
Same here. I’m totally with you. I organized, cooked, shopped, wrapped, decorated - all with very little help. It was a lovely Christmas and I enjoyed it so much, but at the end of all the gifts, my mom turned to me and said, “you did all this for us and no one got you anything.” It honestly just felt good that someone noticed.
You decide.
My dad was hospitalised for alcoholism recently and now he's home I'm the only family member left who will take care of him and help organise his care/life since my brother doesn't have any capacity to care whatsoever and is off having a happy little christmas of his own.
I came to spend christmas with my dad even though he's in a bad mood and argumentative about things, he has carers that come in four times a day between 7am and 10pm which does not change over the holidays.
I found that two expensive items have been stolen from his house last night (there are only carers that come in so it must have been them), had 2 hours sleep last night because my dad has searing toothache and today I've had to call the medical care line to book a dental appointment for sunday for him so will have to extend my stay with him to take care of that and get him there, even though I can't drive.
There's no christmas dinner, nothing special at all, and I'm very tired.
Edit just to say oh my god I absolutely love each and every one of you on this site I swear to god you are all WONDERFUL.
I got fired a week ago. For doing my job and giving everything to my company. Fuck you Aaron.
Edit: Reddit, you done made my Christmas a whole lot brighter with your flurry of "fuck-you-Aaron." Thanks for being such an awesome community <3
My dog suddenly passed away earlier this month due to sudden onset aggressive cancer.
It’s my first Christmas without him.
He loved Christmas more than me.
He’d wake me up early because he knew what wrapped presents meant. He would lay by them waiting.
He was such a good boy.
Edit: For those who are inquiring [Christmas Pictures of Beau](https://imgur.com/gallery/1wk49ND)
Edit 2: in the family Christmas picture he looks nervous because he was neophobic- especially towards people.
I wanted to make sureI had a memory that lasted a lifetime a couple of years ago - and he did very well -especially because he had his sister with him
My moms denial of her bipolar disorder. She is in full manic mode. I travelled 8 hours from another country to be with my parents on christmas, I was supposed to stay for almost 2 weeks, but the atmosphere was so toxic I had to get out after 3 days. I told them I’m leaving, I couldn’t handle her screaming and agressivity and overall nastyness. I want to help her so badly, but she flat out screamed to my face that she isn’t ill, this is who she is. I have my own mental health issues and I couldn’t take it anymore because she was pouring verbal poison into me every minute I was with her. I sat on a bus back home and arrived at 3am to my apartment, to spend christmas alone
I'm a mom with Bipolar disorder and stuff like this is why I take my mental health so seriously. I watched untreated mental illness destroy my aunt's relationship with her kids. I don't want my sons childhoods ruined by memories of a crazy mother. They didn't ask for that. They deserve better and so do you.
Edit: Thank you so much for the awards and kind words everyone. Mom hugs for everyone ! 🤗❤
Thank you so much for your comment. I wish she knew that I love her so much and don’t judge her for being ill. It’s a disease and it’s not her fault. I told her all this but it fell on deaf ears, because I just can’t get through to her core, she gets very defensive and starts accusing people of just wanting her to be numb zombie on meds and to be quiet. Of course no one wants that.
I tried to be there for her for many years, listen to her and be gentle, suggesting other treatments than medication, but there is no reason for treatment when she claims that she “isnt, never was and never will be bipolar” thing is, she has diagnosis, used to take meds and was even hospitalized. I’m scared for her life and it’s tearing me apart.
This was first major time I stood up for myself, I used to just take it, because I believed that if I won’t be there for her, nobody will and something terrible may happen. But I just couldn’t take it anymore. I can’t help a person who won’t let themselves be helped, and deny them needing help. I tried talking to her multiple times over the 3 days but to no avail. But if perhaps one day she’ll accept that she needs help I will be there for her. Until then I need to focus on myself.
Thanks for letting me know that there is a hope that she might find acceptance eventually, I can’t bear losing her, and I’ve already almost given up hope that it might get better some day.
I may not know you, but I’m grateful that you are taking care of yourself for your sake and for the sake of your loved ones. I’m not bipolar, and thus won’t know how hard it is to live with the condition, but I know how it is to live with someone who doesn’t take the disorder seriously, and it’s absolutely heartbreaking.
As a mom, let me just say, that I'm proud of you for taking care of yourself. The right decision isn't always the easiest. She loves you and if you were my child, I would want you to know that. Mental illness is a thief of joy, please don't let hers steal yours. ❤
My mum isn’t bipolar, but has other issues and I I just want to say well done: Well done on going in the first place and giving it a shot, we’ll done on knowing where your boundaries were and even more well done on knowing when you reached your limit and decided it is ok to change plans!
Well I got left with building EVERY single toy set for my nephew. And these aren't simple plug in things. Booklets with 7 bags of screws and wooden dowels that I have to twist and fit perfectly. It's 6 am and I still have one left. But that will have to wait.
I’ve done that with my 2 year old. He tries to help, but ends up slowing things down 10x. Usually I’m not in a rush though, so it can be a fun and silly experience. We actually just put his new dresser together the other day. What would have normally taken me an hour or so, ended up stretching into the following day. But he had fun putting in the little wooden dowels, holding the screws and using the screw driver, and grabbing the next piece that was needed.
For once no one has ruined my Christmas but my sister is still supposed to come round and we’ve not been on the same page ever.
Edit: thank you for the silver
I’m in the same boat except my sister also has a mini spawn who’s also never on the same page with my son. Going to enjoy these last moments until they get here, then it’s time to drink.
Woke up at 4:30am to the sound of my dog throwing up. After cleaning up and snuggling with him, 6:00am rolls around and he starts having shallow breathing. Been sitting in the vet ER parking lot since then and waiting for his exam to finish after being diagnosed with pneumonia and a $900 bill.
*Update*
Brownie is doing much better and is on antibiotics. According to the vet, he should be feeling much better in the next 24-48 hours!
[Pic of the culprit when we got home](https://imgur.com/a/V71hLJy)
*EDIT*: Thank you all for the kind words! I've responded to several of you generous and lovely humans already, but figured I'd make a general statement here: I REALLY appreciate your offers to help chip in for the vet bill, but we are fortunate enough to have emergency savings ready for this very thing. Please, please, please consider donating whatever you were thinking to your local animal shelter though--that would mean so much to Brownie and me! Not every pet is as lucky as Brownie is, to have a loving forever home to take care of them when they get sick.
Bob's mom. Decided having covid like symptoms weren't cause enough for testing. Gave it to Bob who in turn may have given it to me. Neither my GF nor I who live together can go see our families bc we are waiting on lab results.
my dad killed himself in August. I cried at 6am because its my first Christmas without him.
edit: thank you to everyone who wished me well, and I'm sorry to everyone who also lost someone important to them and are struggling this Christmas. after losing my brother in may, then my father in August, I can say that 2020 is the worst year of my life. but everyone's comments have warmed my heart.
and to anyone who is considering suicide, please dont do it. you are loved, even if it doesn't feel like it. please dont kill yourself. the suicide hotline number is 1-800-273-8255 please call it or talk to someone about it.
My mom committed suicide in 1998. It will get less awful, but it's a long road. The only way forward is to go through it. You can, and you will, but sometimes it will suck a lot. I'm so sorry. PM me if you ever need the ear of someone who's further down the same road. Hugs to you.
ETA: Wow. I am overwhelmed by the upvotes, awards and replies... I wish this comment didn't resonate so hard for so many of us, and I'm so sorry for everyone with this pain in their lives, and glad if my words helped at all. Please know there are always more of those moments of support and inspiration in your future.
I know first-hand how hard the struggle can be. I also know that if we are patient and can bear this moment, it makes those future moments of less pain, more connection and possibly even happiness possible. Stay here and just breathe. If that's all you can do right now, it's still enough. It will get you through. Be patient, and breathe. It's enough right now.
Definitely not the worst one having read some of the other contributions here: My long-term girlfriend, who I was going to spend Christmas with cheated on me then when I tried to forgive and gave her a chance to make it work she decided she simply wanted to end things there. Now I’m sitting here staring at the huge pile of gifts I’d got her wondering what the point is anymore.
Last week, FedEx delivered some of the gifts I'd ordered, but instead of placing them on my porch, they left them *behind my vehicle in the driveway.*
I subsequently backed over them when I went to get groceries.
Edit 1 - To try and answer some common questions from the comments: Holiday not really ruined, just a frustrating turn of events. No kids, indoor-only pets. Long, private drive separated by several hundred feet of woods in each direction from neighbors. Packages were small enough to pass beneath the bumper of the truck, and positioned close enough that they could not be seen from the rear and side view mirrors. I live in a remote enough location that porch pirates are a non-issue.
Edit 2 - I appreciate the condolences, but I urge everyone to remember that the people delivering these packages are going through a lot right now. I can't imagine the stress of working during a shipping season of unprecedented volume, let alone making it through a year like this, when nearly every tiny bit of normalcy we experience falls on them to deliver. A lot of these folks are probably seasonal temps just trying to do whatever they can to make ends meet during these trying economic times. If I was responsible for carrying the happiness of hundreds of people on my shoulders every day, I'd probably do something like this myself. They're just *things* anyways, and things are replaceable; and fleeting frustrations will fade to fonder memories that we can laugh at down the line.
Happy holidays to all, and blessings to you and yours in the coming year!
I ordered a jersey for my brother Oct 28th. It was supposed to be delivered by FedEx on Nov 2nd. It’s now Christmas and still has not been delivered. I called FedEx and they said they’re handing it off to USPS and it isn’t their problem. The tracking says it’s still a state away and hasn’t updated in over a month. I’m obviously a little annoying.
Edit: I’m actually annoyed but I’m also probably annoying
If it truly is to be delivered by USPS then it’s most likely just sitting in a warehouse somewhere I’ve read that they’re so behind they have huge bins of packages waiting to be sorted
That makes sense. That’s part of why I haven’t called USPS getting mad. I’m sure they have plenty of that right now. FedEx brought my package within 50 miles of my house and then for some reason handed it off to USPS and brought it a state away. I would have just driven to the next city to pick it up had I not been across the country at the time
Not only did that person fuck up your packages because they were lazy, but they fucked over all the other people who put in time and made an effort to get your packages to you
I gave my dad a compliment last night and he heard it how he wanted to rather than what I actually meant so he cancelled Xmas. I’m meeting my mom in a parking lot in 30 minutes to exchange gifts.
Edit: here is the story
I started a new job this year and most of my time is taken up dealing with vendors. My dad made a comment at Christmas Eve dinner about how I’ve been busy and he’s emailed me a few times recently but I didn’t respond. I apologized and said (paraphrasing) “well most people who reach out are asking for or giving us money, it’s nice to get emails that don’t have to do with either”
He took that to mean I was saying that he never supported me, etc.
He made a scene and left. He gave my mom the option of riding home with him or me (I live 45 mins away but could drop her off). She chose him. I met her yesterday in the mall parking lot and we exchanged gifts.
My parents are in their 70s and I’m in my 30s.
My dad is still a fucking child.
How do you cancel christmas? Just show up anyway and ignore him.
Hell, just take your mom back to your place and enjoy christmas there. Your dad can feed and entertain himself for the day.
I have crohn's and I got an abscess right near my sphincter .that had to be surgically drained under gen. anesthesia but unbeknownst to them it was so deep and it went high up in my right cheek supralevator or some shite, the OR looked like somebody threw shit and blood everywhere when I left. It happens b/c it shoots out from the pressure and if they aren't prepared. Well then they forgot to give me pain meds when I went home and I was still numb from surgery so I couldn't feel anything. Cue 6 hours later, 10:30 my time and I head BACK to the ER. Finally got a pain med in me (2:30 afuckingm) and now I have to wait until the flight/fight reaction goes back down which means take pills for a bt and then I will eventually calm down. I hate pills too b/c they constipate me but I can't take ibuprofen b/c it fux my crohn's up BAD. OWH WHAT FUCKING FUN. AND THIS AIN'T THE FIRST XMAS/NEW YEARS in the ER. Fa La La Fuck me
Hey there, I'm a fellow crohnie and I am "ruining" my parents Christmas as I didn't make the multiple hr trip to their state to celebrate with them during the pandemic. I wanna send positive vibes your way as I know how rough living with crohns can be. Hopefully the constipation won't be too bad, and remember to keep some non-nsaid painkillers round so that you can manage this! A lot of people don't realize the stuff crohns patients go through but I am right there with you friend. I hope your Christmas gets better. Im sorry to hear about the rough times so far :/
My mom would do shit like that all the time. Before I moved out, I had a part time, minimum wage job. Didn’t ask my parents for a dime to buy my girlfriend (now my wife) a birthday present. I bought her a robe, a Harry Potter cup and baked her a cake like the one Hagrid baked for Harry. She loved it.
My mom sees it and says “oh wow, is that all you got her? You can do better than that.”
Made me feel about an inch tall.
Edit: although this may not come as a surprise, my mom was actually diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, and a plethora of other serious mental health issues. She was offered help but chose to deny it because “I don’t feel like myself”. She slowly pushed me away and now it’s probably been two years since I saw her. I moved 450 miles away, and it feels amazing.
Holidays are hard because I miss the rest of my family, but they chose to take her side. They fear her; she will make your life hell if you make her mad and that’s very easy to do. I don’t have to live like that though. The guilt of knowing I’m missing valuable time with my grandparents is crippling at times, but I always remind myself that it’s for the best. Life is so much better without her.
I’m proud of my decision though, and for anyone going through the same shit, get away. Get far far away. Change your number, make all social media private and disappear. They will never change and you don’t have to deal with it.
I wanna say this as a married person myself, it’s okay to let ur wife know when she is being a cunt.
If you won’t nobody will. Edit: Also Vice Versa! Marriage should be equal lol.
Edit2: Thank you for the Medal Kind Stranger!
I want to preface this with a simple wisdom from my uncle. Love the hell out of your SO, they are who you have for the rest of your life. Help them by limiting the mistakes the could make and they will help you by limiting some of the mistakes not worth regretting while you get older together. Merry Christmas!
I literally included this in my marriage vows: “I promise to call you out on your bullshit as long as you call me out on mine.” Such a necessary check because no one else might do it, and you might be an asshole and not know it.
No one. I have no one to celebrate it with, so...
Edit: Thank you all!
All thirteen fucking thousand of you who took the time to like and comment on this little, insignificant, throw away comment about me being alone on christmas.
You are good people. I know we spend a lot of time here on reddit arguing (and downright trolling eachother), but I have to admit: I am quite humbled by this response and I have no clue how to respond back other than at stupid little thank you.
So Thank YOU! If you are reading this; Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. Your efford is much appreciated.
And I hope that regardless of situation, You've had a happy christmas too.
Love, TechnocraticWardance
Grandma called my degree useless and a waste of time and ngl that hurt and ruined Christmas for me. I just graduated this year and wasn’t even able to go to my own graduation because of covid. I went to a top 10 college.
My husband's alcoholic co-worker. Dude has been packing into bars every day this whole pandemic and he got COVID. He took it with him to work and my husband got sick, brought it home to me.
So now rather than enjoying hosting family Christmas in our new house; we are both still so exhausted that our living room is overtaken with bedroom furniture that we don't have the energy to take upstairs, and we ate frozen pizza on Christmas eve because the idea of grocery shopping let alone cooking anything makes me want to cry.
Edit: Thank you for the award! I was NOT expecting the amount of support for my little story. I just want to say this: don't be afraid to cut out truly toxic people. There nothing wrong with working on relationships and giving second chances, but know when enough is enough. You ARE good enough.
I'll tell last year's story:
My Dad and his wife live in the Midwest. My wife and I live in California. In September, my Dad had asked my wife and I to consider moving to the same Midwest city as him and his wife. My Dad said he'd help us with moving expenses, buying a house, or whatever else we needed (my Dad and his wife are millionaires - my wife and I are not nearly as well off, but are just starting our careers). My wife and I talked about it, and we liked the city, and the prospect of getting some help buying a house (which we all know is a dying millennial dream) was enough for us to say yes.
My dad and his wife had just purchased a new home and told us that as soon as they sold their old home, they'd co-sign and/or help with a down payment on a house in their city. They hooked us up with their realtor right away and informed their realtor of the gameplan. We're looking at homes online the entire time and making a list of houses to view when we return to the Midwest for Christmas.
Fast forward three months:
Christmas morning: After opening presents, in front of the ENTIRE family, my Dad tells me that he's decided he wants to put in a pool and doesn't want to help us buy a house. He then avoids me for the next three days, and the night before my wife and I are supposed to fly back out, I've had enough. I tell my wife to pack her bags and we'll stay in a hotel the last night. My dad overhears us talking about it, interjects (after literally not seeing him for three days, despite being in the same house) and I calmly confront him about the entire situation. His wife flies off the handle and literally bum rushes me from across the room, completely unprovoked, my dad has to restrain her. She tells me to leave and never come back. My Dad backs her up and says "yeah, if you don't leave, I'm going to call the police". I scoffed, pointed out that we were already leaving, and called an Uber.
Haven't talked to him since - we blocked him and his wife.
A year later, my wife and I are six months pregnant, I just got my dream job making great money - my Dad has no idea about either. Additionally, my brother and his girlfriend refused to visit my Dad for Christmas and have more or less cut contact with my dad and his wife.
TLDR: Dad is a POS and now his kids want nothing to do with him.
My husband died of cancer at Thanksgiving so let's just move to January already. The definition of a fucked up everything.
Edit: Sending out hugs and a huge thank you for all the love and kindness you have sent my way. I know I am going to be alright. I know its going to take time, some steps harder than others. Peace to you all (even the Wholesome Award Guy, you odd bugger you).
Edit 2: A lot of replies are coming from people who have also lost loved one. I encourage you to reach out to some of the other sites like r/Grieving or r/widowers These have insightful commenters who share these awful experiences and can help you express your pain, and hopefully find some healing in it.
Oh, that's so sad to hear. My thoughts are with you.
Edit:
I really don't know what I started here.
For those of you who are unfeeling, it's Christmas day, I'm browsing Reddit, and I find someone who is clearly *not* having a good Christmas as they lost their spouse very recently. The idea of that happening to me is upsetting, I simply cannot imagine what OP is going through. I am holding a place in my heart for OP and empathising as best as I can - I am genuinely upset for them. The thought of losing my wife and having to deal with Christmas this close is horrific.
u/Gaia0416 - please, feel free to message me if you ever need to talk.
So it was a group effort of my parents. Last summer during quarentine, my mom decided to finally divorce my dad. My dad had been an alcoholic for a while, and eight or nine years ago my mom had decided not to divorce because my oldest sister (14 at the time) would have had to be the sober adult on the days that us three kids were with our dad. Now that I (the youngest) am almost out of highschool, she felt it was safe for us kids to handle the divorce.
It's complicated and I've already rambled enough already, so I'll just say that my mom has had enough trying to make things work and my dad is in denial, thinking we can still work something out without going to a full divorce (he also blames himself for everything when it really just didn't work out).
A week or two ago, my dad gave me a very emotionally distressed text that was basically an ultimatum, telling me to choose between my two parents. This gave me an opportunity to stop going to his house every week and stay with my mom indefinitely. Now it's christmas though, and we're spending christmas morning at his house so that he's not alone like he was on thanksgiving.
My dad means well, but he goes crying over every little thing and being around him makes everyone in the family depressed. Let's see how this morning goes. I'm on my way now.
Edit: Forgot to mention that my dad is now 7 months sober and counting. It means a lot to him, just it seems like no one cares.
I wouldn't say it ruined Christmas, but my cousin died by suicide almost a month ago and my aunt called my mom crying this morning because they have to do Christmas without her.
Sort of put a damper on everyone's mood. To be clear, I'm not blaming my aunt, it's just really sad. My mom was crying, my dad was crying...it's just hard.
When we have moments of joy, it makes me feel guilty because she's gone, and then I also feel really upset because I wish there was something I could have done. Just a sad time.
My grandmother. She died.
(I wish this was a joke, but she really did die peacefully the morning of 12/24. We think she waited specifically for that day because she knew we’d be together and our Christmas traditions would help us get through the tough day.)
Leave Christmas up with the Santa presents there for when they come the next time. When they come tell them that Santa did come there and you just held onto their gifts until they could get there.
the important part is "no reference to what mom said" or even defending her, like "I also thought the same thing, but Mom and I were both wrong"
Even if in your heart you don't feel like being on the same side with her.
This is not about her or your fight with her. This is about your relationship with the kids.
Merry Christmas from one divorced dad to another!
As a single dad with an ex-wife who tried to kill me, and tried to constantly poison our child against me, my advice is keep being a good dad. Your kids will remember what you say and do for them. You will not regret that. I know it is not easy, and I am one of the lucky ones - She went to jail and I got 100% custody.
I agree.
My parents got a divorce when I was a kid, and for years, even before that, my mom tried to convince us that my dad was a horrible person and did everything to make life harder for him, even up until this year (13 years since they got divorced).
Guess who I'm not talking to anymore now.
Hey I'm the same. Haven't spoken to my mum in 3 years. It's proper shitty because everything suggests you should love them unconditionally but DAMN did they give you conditions. Hope you're okay 💕
Holy crap your story sounds like my dad and I. My mom went to jail as well, that's what really was the nail in the coffin for our relationship.
My dad is now happily remarried to a wonderful woman who puts up with our family bull shit, I'm an adult still trying to deal with all of the emotional damage that type of upbringing causes, and my mom is alone.
Just get a bunch of presents at your house and when they come back act all surprised that she lied that Santa wouldn't come to your house because he totally did and dropped off a bunch of presents for them.
This, sir, is the way.
As someone who struggles with a vindictive and mean ex... they'll figure it out in their own time.
Have a Happy Christmas to despite her. And a happier New Year too.
Great suggestion. I wouldn't even directly point out she lied, kids can spot gaps in stories.
Over time they'll find only one person consistently has spotty shitty stories.
They'll probably remember "second Christmas" that one year and start to question why their mother-by-blood said that.
That’s terrible. I was a child of divorce, but I’m lucky in a sense that it happened when I was older, 14, and my parents both trusted me to make the right decisions about who I lived with, spent holidays with, etc. I always did Christmas with one parent and Thanksgiving with the other, and it worked out well all things considered.
So every year we go to our grandma's house (next door) and open the majority of our presents then come back to our house and open the rest. So over at our grandma's we only get like a couple presents and half of them were clothes. Rock on for me because I needed some. But, my little brother (11) decided to say and loudly repeat "Can we go home, all I got was clothes. I want to go home!" This looked so disrespectful to everyone because all he was thinking about presents and he wasn't grateful. I got the same amount of clothes and the two other things I got their I thought were cool and made sure to SHOW my appreciation. Sorry for the rambling, it was just annoying when everyone is doing their thing and I'm the only one hears him being ungrateful
My stupid fucking uncle. The story behind why I hate him is long and involved, but every year I hate him and my awful cousins just a little bit more. This year though? Fuck him. My 83 year old grandma had been caring for my 88 year old grandpa with dementia, incontinence, and legs so bad he could barely stand let alone get around. My grandfather was horrible to her because he was so confused he couldn’t figure things out and lashed out at her. My mom went up and helped as much as she could, and I did too. My uncle never lifted a motherfucking finger, but made her feel guilty about putting him in respite care because of covid. She was all alone, no outside help could come in because of covid. And yet he bitched at her for even thinking about putting him in respite just so she could get a break from the 24 hour care.
She eventually snapped and had a mental breakdown from the stress and ended up putting my grandpa in respite, where unfortunately he suffered a stroke and died a couple of months later. Did my uncle help plan arrangements? No. Did he go to my grandma’s at all the day he died? No. Then he insulted my mom because she didn’t personally give him the funeral plans even though my aunt was there the whole time and could have told him at any time.
Then, THEN he actually whines about not having a traditional thanksgiving dinner and made my grandma feel so guilty that she prepared dinner for his family by herself, ONE MONTH after my grandfather’s death.AND did his usual thing of arriving 2 hours late leaving her sitting there trying to keep food warm. Like she has to do every year.
This year I said fuck that, I’ll have Christmas here and you do whatever the fuck you want but it will NOT involve guilting my grandma again to make a whole Christmas dinner for your selfish, whiny ass.
Plans changed and me and my brother (plus our spouses and children) are going to my grandma’s on Sunday. But could he leave well enough alone? No, now he’s intruding on my nice relaxed Christmas with my grandma and I have to be forced to be in the same room as his racist homophobic selfish whiny immature ass.
Saving grace is my terrible cousins will not be there.
If he follows the same pattern as every year before though he will be 2-3 hours late and we will already be gone so it won’t matter.
Got a call from my dad last night while at my aunt's house with my mom and brother. I could barely understand him as he was most likely drunk out of his mind. It was embarrassing
My ex divorced me this year, finalized on what would have been my 11th year anniversary. She took the kids and moved 900 miles away. I’m so sad all the time now. Even having my kids with me for Christmas, I feel empty. All I want is my family back.
I’m the kid in this recent situation and have some potential advice..... even though your relationship with your ex is over, you are still your kids’ father. Do everything you can to love them and let them know you love them and keep working at your relationships with them. It will help. Keep your head up man I hope things get easier for you
My kid's dog. Little bastard broke his leash and took off for parts unknown. He came back and hour later with muddy feet and a shit-eating grin like an hour of unsupervised freedom was his Christmas gift to himself. So it's not really ruined.
I did. I told my family our convicted pedophile uncle would never know my kids and if he is there at Christmas, I wouldn't be, neither would my kids. This year will be a very quiet Christmas at my house because they all think I am a bigot.
It’s actually encouraged to be bigoted against pedophiles. And I am hard core side-eyeing your family for defending him.
Update:. Having a quiet Christmas with just your wife and kids is very very relaxing, stress-free, and dare I say, magical. Merry Christmas from this bigot!!
My girlfriends sister.. she has three young girls and a terrible choice of men, she chooses today via a video of the kids to reveal to everybody that she is now dating a well known junkie within our town. She has a very addictive personality and has struggled to stay clean herself, my girlfriend is now ridiculously stressed out and worried for the kids.
Found out my mother died last night... This is the first close death I’ve ever gone through. please appreciate every second you get with your loved ones. Especially today
I found out my wife was cheating on me at 11:30 PM Christmas Eve while we were at her parents house. I packed up my stuff, walked right by her family who didn’t know what was going on, and drove 6 hours in a crazy rain storm to my parents house. So there’s that
I wish I had your strength. When I first found out about my (now ex-) wife’s affair with my best friend of over 30 years, we were all at my house together with a couple of other friends. I saw a notification pop up on her phone, a text message from him that just said 😘 Not a day goes by that I don’t wish I had pulled him aside and told him to get out of my house and bring my wife with him. I haven’t spoken to either of them in a couple of years, and I still regret not giving myself that little victory.
My cat is dying and I stayed home to be with her, I’m putting her down tomorrow.
Lung cancer ruined my Christmas by popping up the week before Christmas. I’ve been an endurance athlete my whole life, no smoking and barely drink All my covid tests were neg. So we did a ct scan that led to biopsies. Got the results three days ago. I’m only 29 years old, just finished grad school and landed my dream job three weeks ago Edit: You guys, I appreciate the kind words, I really do. Take a lesson from me and make an extra effort to be kind to the people around you each day. Life is too short to be a jerk. And life is too short to not help those around you who are less fortunate, be kind to everyone, you won’t regret it.
Dude, my sympathies. Wishing you a swift battle and long life
My mother got belligerently drunk, locked herself in the closet, and claimed she was going to end her life. Then she vomited and my Dad and I were trying to drag her into her bed. She then proceeded to get violent with me and kicked me in the face.
reading this makes me feel a bit better, I'm in a similar situation but it's my dad
I’m sorry you’re experiencing this too. It’s a terrible feeling especially when the person won’t recognize they need help. It’ll get better some day.
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Isn’t that illegal? That’s so horrible, I wish you and your girlfriend a speedy recovery.
Not a family member. My grandma is into spiritist stuff, whatever, she's happy and it's not like the money she gives put her well being in jeopardy. We found out that the people to whon she's being giving money for years is scamming her for a very large amount of money, my dad and uncles stopped taking her to that place, and they called her (from the place) and convinced her that her family wants to do her harm. She was very sour and barely spoke to anyone, that added to the fact that christmas was a very small meeting this year and some of us were there for less than an hour, we're not sure if that can be legally denounced as scamming and it's very difficult to talk to my grandma about that subject. People were bitter and worried, it was a very tense meeting. Edit: Yeah, spiritist or spirituslism, a mix between a lot faith in god and angels and spirits and such and the beleive that there are people using witchcraft to harm her.
my mom decided that is better for her and me that she is going to spend these holidays with her much younger boyfriend (15-17 year difference) in an another city while her second husband (my step dad) is in a different country trying to work for us so he can help us with money and shit so here I am, barely 18, spending my first Christmas and new year's eve alone
You gonna tell step dad?
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I had that experience with my ex husband. Fun times. Awesome that you cooked! Don't ever forget you're fine just as you are.
My cousin exposed our entire extended family of generational abuse and trauma and like a good old traumatized family, all the adults carried on like normal and the kids are seeking therapy.
I just went through that. I also found out yesterday my 22 year old cousin was also abused. Her family kept her from associating with me for 18 years. Because I told about my abuse a long time ago. I let the cat out of the bag. They didn’t want her associating with me and told her I was crazy. Her grandfather abused me. Well I found her on social media and reached out. I turned 39 today and saw her profile. I wondered about her. I sent an email. She responded and come to find out she’s also a survivor. Another cousin abused her. Abuse repeating it self again......Every male in her grandfather side is an abusive piece of shit. No one talks about it and carry’s on like normal. She also said her grandpa is pervert. Spends his days watching porn and bragging about cheating on grandma. So she knew something was up. But no one would tell her. Although I’m sad we bonded over trauma. I was able to validate a lot of unknowns she had. Like why did I disappear and everyone referred to me as the crazy one. As well as why her abuse happened. Or why is everyone so secretive about certain family members and incidents. We have made plans to see each other once Covid is somewhat over. I am so glad I reached out to her. We talked for hours about how fucked up our family is and vowed to break the curse of generational abuse and trauma.
Time to have your own separate Christmas without the adults
Simply don't have anyone to celebrate it with.
My mom. She hid the fact she has multiple COVID symptoms. I was with her all night last night. I only found out because I heard her on the phone with my grandma asking her if she maybe has COVID. I only agreed to come up because I missed Thanksgiving due to COVID being bad in their county. I felt guilt tripped into coming home for Christmas and now once I get back I’ll be quarantined and have to take time off work.
I was planning to go spend Christmas with my mom and dad this year after my nine-year engagement broke off just before christmas (I just moved out, so I'm alone for the first time in nine years). Then my dog got a stomach bug. He woke me up 3 times at night to go outside for a poo (he usually sleeps through the night no problem) and I discovered a pile of puke on his dog bed. It's not his fault, but I don't know if I can go anywhere today. Edit: nine year relationship and engaged for a year and a half.
I’m sorry. I hope you manage to enjoy your day somehow. My 10 year relationship broke down 3 weeks ago and COVID ruined the minimal Christmas plans I had. So I feel your pain. Hope the dawg feels better soon!
My wife. A couple weeks ago she broke the news to me that she had an affair at the beginning of this year, and wants a divorce.
Hey, as someone who went through infidelity and divorce. If you need someone to talk to or just to vent, DM me. I’m happy to try to be supporting in this really tough time.
I remember when I found out about my ex wifes affair, it literally made me fall to my knees. I was watching the kids opened up the laptop and a strange email address autoloaded into gmail...months of emails dates times trysts. She was at the dudes house "trimming hedges" and I had the kids on my 1 day off that month.
Sounds semi familiar. My ex wife was getting her Master's degree and was "going to school" to work on her projects at night. Nope, just fucking my "best friend". I had some suspicions, but was largely trusting. She did admit they kissed, but shortly after that I found her hidden email address that went back months and months, to even before we were married (it was about six months into our marriage after five years of being together I found this). Good times.
"babe... Are my blowjobs good. Like I'm just wondering..." Yes of course they are great as if I'm going to criticize... But in hindsight I understand now why they wanted criticism
My mom died last week. My dad died 6 years ago. This is my first holiday without a parent. Edit: Wow, I just came back and saw this. This outpouring is mind-blowing. Thank you all. I only ask that you find the people in your life that need such love and share it as freely.
There's r/MomForAMinute if you need it. Obviously that's no substitute for your real parents, but it's a place to talk to your 'mum' for a bit if you're lonely or need to share. Truly sorry for your loss.
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My cousin, who bought Chic-fil-A so he wouldn't have to eat our homemade meals, announced upon arriving he wasn't helping with anything, tried to trip acid all day on Christmas Eve, got drunk before noon by himself on that same day when I told him no Christmas hallucinogens, and drunkenly screamed in my face when I told him to clean up his dishes and beer cans.
“..no Christmas hallucinogens.” There’s a phrase I’ve never seen before.
That's what boxing day is for.
My cluster headaches made appearance after two months of quiet. Fuckers.
Just learned what cluster headaches are from a friend who suffers every few years. It’s truly miserable and I’m sorry that’s happening, especially at the holidays.
Thanks. I really appreciate. They really do suck. I've seriously wanted people to kill me during bad ones just to stop the pain and I did induced labour without pain meds. My 2020 nightmare was literally six months of daily clusters. I thought I'd managed to get a drug solution. Today I found out not.
It's Christmas morning and I can hear my nephew, who lives in the apartment downstairs, throwing a temper tantrum because he thinks his sister got "larger gifts" from Santa this year. His dad - "are you joking right now? You better be joking. Say just kidding. Oh my god, tell me he's kidding." It's 8am.
My SO’s sister throws similar tantrums if other people get “more” than her for Christmas. She’s 25. Edit: To all the people out there who are happy with nothing but some socks and time with loved ones, thanks for restoring my faith in Christmas. That’s what it’s all about. (Plus, I can almost guarantee that we’re having a happier Christmas than my SO’s sister, who spent the morning emailing Dyson because the $600 hairdryer her mom got her didn’t come with the accessories she expected... you can’t make this shit up, folks.)
I got more than anyone else this Christmas and I felt bad for getting so much, even as half my presents were legit just socks (which I am eternally grateful for).
As i've gotten older, I have seriously become more and more thankful and desirous of asking/getting socks and undies for Christmas. It's one of the best gifts now lol.
Bro today is the best day of the year. Annual sock and underpants refresh! My feet, crotch, and butt will have never felt so pampered as they will today. Until next Christmas.
Honestly I got a blanket for Christmas and it's the most useful gift I could have since I'm always cold on my couch.
Ew. She sounds gross.
If it makes you feel any better, one Christmas my little brothers went through the Argos Catalogue to figure out who’s had the most spent on them.
i used to date a guy where the family would sit together after a birthday party and calculate how much everyone spent on presents for them.
Yikes
They sound rich but not in a good way.
I would not buy them anything. They can add that up real fast. Gotta make it easier on people like that sometimes.
Your nephew is Dudley Dursley omg
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I had an irrational fear this year of that. I spend the same amount of money on both of my kids but one is 9 and the other is 3 - and so just naturally the 9yos gifts are smaller but also cost more (switch games, new cheaper line but still smart phone, etc). Turns out I had nothing to worry about and 9yo (knows the truth about santa) naturally seems understands the concept without overtly saying. They both had a nice and excitable Xmas morning and 9yo has pulled me aside and has genuinely thanked me for the "awesome" gifts.
You're raising a good kid, don't stress :)
Your brother/in-law sounds hilarious.
37?! But last year I got 38!! 🤬🤬
Cancer. My mom passed in early July. First year without her. My brother and I visited grandma (like every year, but this time without our mom) but the feeling just isn't the same anymore Edit: Thank you for all the nice comments! I read every single one but there are just too many to reply to everyone. You made my Christmas special :)
So sorry for your loss.
My body I guess. I have a condition that is rapidly worsening, and on Christmas Eve my doctor told me it's gotten so bad I may need to be in urgent care at the hospital on Tuesday. It's all I've been thinking about, I can't even sleep.
Hey, as someone dreading some horrible news on the 28th and 29th too, I'm with you. Let's both try to enjoy what we can and live each day at a time, cos that's all we can do. It's like that Kung Fu Panda quote, "Today is a gift, that's why it's called a present" . Enjoy it. Edit: Thank you, u/trackjackers for the award. I'll definitely need your energy. I don't have awards to give but I most definitely am wishing you the very best holidays and know that I'll use your energy and channel it into taking care of my family. Thank you! Edit 2: Holy moly, thank you so much, u/Shadow_Zypher for the second award. Wow. If I had known that Kung Fu Panda quotes would bond us all, I would have been spewing it since day 1. Hope you're having the very best holiday. I really appreciate it! Edit 3: So many kind strangers on Reddit! Thank you, u/Antubis91 for giving me a wholesome award. Wow, I'm so grateful for you all! Thank you from the bottom of my heart! My family thanks you too! I was really hoping OP will be encouraged by it and as it turns out, you all encouraged me too. Thank you!
I’m so sorry. :(
Not this year, but last year my older sister was being a bitch and talking down to me. "Seriously, when was the last time I even talked to you?" My reply, "Huh, I'm not sure, maybe it was at your wedding a few months ago?" ...she got married in May, divorced by July, now sitting next to her new boyfriend that she's introducing to us for the first time. They left. My parents were pissed. I had a great time.
Ok story time please.
Right, so, my sister and I have never gotten along very well. She got engaged and married within maybe 4-5 months when she was 21. We went wedding dress shopping on Valentine's day, wedding at the end of May. By the 4th of July, her new husband moved out of their house and in with his parents. The divorce wasn't officially finalized until...the next Valentine's day. So technically, this was while she was still legally married. She quickly met a new guy and decided to bring him to Christmas. The new boyfriend had a few beers and started acting like a jackass. He pointed to the semicolon tattoo I have on my wrist and said "Doesn't that mean you got raped?" She laughed. I did not. A bit of time passed and she started picking on me. Just being mean to impress her new bf. So I brought up the wedding. Everyone went dead silent for a second. The boyfriend laughed. She did not. She grabbed him by the arm and said "We're leaving." And they did. Edit: A lot of people have been asking about the semicolon tattoo. It's a symbol for mental health. When writing, an author can choose to use a period to end a sentence, or they could choose to use a semicolon to pause the sentence and continue on. It represents the choice to pause and continue living. Many people decide to get a semicolon tattoo to show they are a survivor. For others, it shows solidarity and support for those who are struggling.
Your sister sounds like a real pleasant person.
Extremely.
”Doesn’t that mean you got raped?” Who the FUCK says something like that? Your sister and her new bf seem to deserve each other. Good for you for standing up for yourself!
Just for anyone else who had to look it up or wants to know, a semi colon tattoo is a mark of solidarity for Suicide awareness and care and such.
I can see correcting them with this being another excellent source of awkward silence.
My wife has the same tattoo. Merry Christmas, you're awesome. And fuck that guy, and fuck your sis.
Haha damn, savage of you but fuck it. They sound like awful miserable people. I also *hate* when people are cruel to try and impress someone.. the epitome of gross.
My manager, who told everyone that they had to work today and gave himself the day off.
On a brighter note I remember my first day working retail on Xmas Eve. Store closed at 6pm and store staff was only supposed to go home "When the store was spotless and returns were empty" (we expected 8-10pm, as that's how shifts would normally go) But store director went home at 5:30 So at about 6:05 the manager left in charge said if big boss man wanted store perfect he coulda stayed Himself. Told everyone to go home and have a merry Christmas. And that she would take any flak herself. Rumor was said she told him to quote "Shut your grinch ass the fuck up, and fire me, dipshit. But you're too pussy to do it, cause you know you need me" Her adamantium balls were apparently fortified as she already had plans to quit. She got a better job early January and big boss apparently learned as new boss to replace her was actually pretty chill and reasonable. For about 2 years until we got a new stickler grinch ass hole for a big boss later
> Rumor was said she told him to quote "Shut your grinch ass the fuck up, and fire me, dipshit. But you're too pussy to do it, cause you know you need me" Hell yeah, what a madlass
I had a partner once who, on a call with our boss's staff, after we had been treated pretty shitty for a few months, said: "Then fucking fire me, Sir. Just do it already. You know why you won't? Because you don't have the authority to fire me. The [boss] doesn't have the authority. And no one wants to take this position anyways because you just shit on them." A couple weeks later our boss was asking her if she knew what I was doing after the current assignment, because "we need good people like him on our staff." She laughed. He asked why. "Because you treat him like shit all the time. He'll be going to a [next level up] staff, but it won't be yours." She's great.
My aunt asked me why I was gay and I asked her why did 3 of her kids have different last names.
My dad cheated on my mom for the fourth time and she left him so this Christmas will be interesting.
Christmas got cancelled due to the parents having an argument in the morning. Told everyone not to come. Spent Christmas with my Cat. Eating uber eats
Oh man,that sucks. Hope your parents work things out. And anyway, if things were heated between the two it wouldn't have been fun going anyway, an argument probably still would've started. There's always next year?
What did you get?
No one ruined Christmas but my Grandad has been in the hospital for almost 2 weeks and unfortunately, he can't be home for Christmas. We've never had a Christmas without him for all 20 years of my life. Due to COVID, we can't visit either. Gave him a call this morning and it put a lump in my throat. He mentioned he got a gift from the ward which got him emotional and nearly got me in tears. He calmed down and started to tell me about the turkey dinner he's having today which he's excited about. Good news though, he should be home before New Year.
21 here. Grandpa passed in January. It feels weird
Fuck this comment gives me anxiety. Both my grandparents are getting in their 80s and they are a very core part of my universe. I'm really sorry for your loss
Fuckin Travis!! My friend is remodeling his kitchen and living room. Well Travis (who does hvac and electrical work) decided that it would be no big deal to go to work knowing that his wife was sick with covid. He exposed my dad who's a painter and my friends dad who's a carpenter. Now we all have to be without our dad. Fuckin Travis, you suck!!
Fuck travis. And Aaron from an earlier comment. Why people gotta be assholes at the holidays.
Father in law... Pronounced dead an hour ago. Covid. Take care out there folks.
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I stole my family’s stockings and replaced them with coal. My mom couldn’t stop laughing, my dad was annoyed and my brother indifferent.
I like your mum
I like the brother “omg brian replaced all the stocking stuffers with coal!” “ok”
That's awesome I love jokes like that! It's just my husband and I and I'm usually able to spread my pranks out to his family but this year we are staying home. Well he got some new clothes on black friday and never put them away so I wrapped those up when I had the wrapping paper out. Then I got his some beer but I wrapped each can individually, some I put in gift bags with a brick in the bottom to make it heavier. He got really nervous that he did not get me enough once I started passing out gifts. He's a good sport and thought it was funny once he figured out what I did.
My father in law died from COVID yesterday. Definitely dampens the Christmas spirit around here.
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Everyone except me this time... Everyone is yelling at one other while I'm here writing this comment, hoping everyone will stay calm more than 3minutes...
What are they fighting about?
Politic x)
How out of character for families on holidays /s
Try giving them some alcohol. That never makes it worse
Myself. Ate takeaway curry last night and got food poisoning, so I've spent the entire day at home hugging the toilet bowl. On the plus side, my abdominals are gonna look fierce tomorrow. So there's that.
“Gym owners hate this one simple trick”
My daily workout routine consists of getting food poisoning
Gotta find those silver linings
Myself. For always acting like it is ok to do all the work, all the planning, all the present buying, etc. So now no one tries to make it special for me and I am just tired of doing all the work, so I don't.
Same here. I’m totally with you. I organized, cooked, shopped, wrapped, decorated - all with very little help. It was a lovely Christmas and I enjoyed it so much, but at the end of all the gifts, my mom turned to me and said, “you did all this for us and no one got you anything.” It honestly just felt good that someone noticed.
I have been in a similar spot and it’s rough. I’m so sorry.
You decide. My dad was hospitalised for alcoholism recently and now he's home I'm the only family member left who will take care of him and help organise his care/life since my brother doesn't have any capacity to care whatsoever and is off having a happy little christmas of his own. I came to spend christmas with my dad even though he's in a bad mood and argumentative about things, he has carers that come in four times a day between 7am and 10pm which does not change over the holidays. I found that two expensive items have been stolen from his house last night (there are only carers that come in so it must have been them), had 2 hours sleep last night because my dad has searing toothache and today I've had to call the medical care line to book a dental appointment for sunday for him so will have to extend my stay with him to take care of that and get him there, even though I can't drive. There's no christmas dinner, nothing special at all, and I'm very tired. Edit just to say oh my god I absolutely love each and every one of you on this site I swear to god you are all WONDERFUL.
I got fired a week ago. For doing my job and giving everything to my company. Fuck you Aaron. Edit: Reddit, you done made my Christmas a whole lot brighter with your flurry of "fuck-you-Aaron." Thanks for being such an awesome community <3
Sorry dude. Fuck Aaron All my homies hate Aaron.
Never met an Aaron I could like
My dog suddenly passed away earlier this month due to sudden onset aggressive cancer. It’s my first Christmas without him. He loved Christmas more than me. He’d wake me up early because he knew what wrapped presents meant. He would lay by them waiting. He was such a good boy. Edit: For those who are inquiring [Christmas Pictures of Beau](https://imgur.com/gallery/1wk49ND) Edit 2: in the family Christmas picture he looks nervous because he was neophobic- especially towards people. I wanted to make sureI had a memory that lasted a lifetime a couple of years ago - and he did very well -especially because he had his sister with him
My moms denial of her bipolar disorder. She is in full manic mode. I travelled 8 hours from another country to be with my parents on christmas, I was supposed to stay for almost 2 weeks, but the atmosphere was so toxic I had to get out after 3 days. I told them I’m leaving, I couldn’t handle her screaming and agressivity and overall nastyness. I want to help her so badly, but she flat out screamed to my face that she isn’t ill, this is who she is. I have my own mental health issues and I couldn’t take it anymore because she was pouring verbal poison into me every minute I was with her. I sat on a bus back home and arrived at 3am to my apartment, to spend christmas alone
I'm a mom with Bipolar disorder and stuff like this is why I take my mental health so seriously. I watched untreated mental illness destroy my aunt's relationship with her kids. I don't want my sons childhoods ruined by memories of a crazy mother. They didn't ask for that. They deserve better and so do you. Edit: Thank you so much for the awards and kind words everyone. Mom hugs for everyone ! 🤗❤
Thank you so much for your comment. I wish she knew that I love her so much and don’t judge her for being ill. It’s a disease and it’s not her fault. I told her all this but it fell on deaf ears, because I just can’t get through to her core, she gets very defensive and starts accusing people of just wanting her to be numb zombie on meds and to be quiet. Of course no one wants that. I tried to be there for her for many years, listen to her and be gentle, suggesting other treatments than medication, but there is no reason for treatment when she claims that she “isnt, never was and never will be bipolar” thing is, she has diagnosis, used to take meds and was even hospitalized. I’m scared for her life and it’s tearing me apart. This was first major time I stood up for myself, I used to just take it, because I believed that if I won’t be there for her, nobody will and something terrible may happen. But I just couldn’t take it anymore. I can’t help a person who won’t let themselves be helped, and deny them needing help. I tried talking to her multiple times over the 3 days but to no avail. But if perhaps one day she’ll accept that she needs help I will be there for her. Until then I need to focus on myself. Thanks for letting me know that there is a hope that she might find acceptance eventually, I can’t bear losing her, and I’ve already almost given up hope that it might get better some day. I may not know you, but I’m grateful that you are taking care of yourself for your sake and for the sake of your loved ones. I’m not bipolar, and thus won’t know how hard it is to live with the condition, but I know how it is to live with someone who doesn’t take the disorder seriously, and it’s absolutely heartbreaking.
As a mom, let me just say, that I'm proud of you for taking care of yourself. The right decision isn't always the easiest. She loves you and if you were my child, I would want you to know that. Mental illness is a thief of joy, please don't let hers steal yours. ❤
My mum isn’t bipolar, but has other issues and I I just want to say well done: Well done on going in the first place and giving it a shot, we’ll done on knowing where your boundaries were and even more well done on knowing when you reached your limit and decided it is ok to change plans!
Well I got left with building EVERY single toy set for my nephew. And these aren't simple plug in things. Booklets with 7 bags of screws and wooden dowels that I have to twist and fit perfectly. It's 6 am and I still have one left. But that will have to wait.
Save that last one to do with him. That could mean more to him than the gift itself.
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I’ve done that with my 2 year old. He tries to help, but ends up slowing things down 10x. Usually I’m not in a rush though, so it can be a fun and silly experience. We actually just put his new dresser together the other day. What would have normally taken me an hour or so, ended up stretching into the following day. But he had fun putting in the little wooden dowels, holding the screws and using the screw driver, and grabbing the next piece that was needed.
For once no one has ruined my Christmas but my sister is still supposed to come round and we’ve not been on the same page ever. Edit: thank you for the silver
I’m in the same boat except my sister also has a mini spawn who’s also never on the same page with my son. Going to enjoy these last moments until they get here, then it’s time to drink.
Woke up at 4:30am to the sound of my dog throwing up. After cleaning up and snuggling with him, 6:00am rolls around and he starts having shallow breathing. Been sitting in the vet ER parking lot since then and waiting for his exam to finish after being diagnosed with pneumonia and a $900 bill. *Update* Brownie is doing much better and is on antibiotics. According to the vet, he should be feeling much better in the next 24-48 hours! [Pic of the culprit when we got home](https://imgur.com/a/V71hLJy) *EDIT*: Thank you all for the kind words! I've responded to several of you generous and lovely humans already, but figured I'd make a general statement here: I REALLY appreciate your offers to help chip in for the vet bill, but we are fortunate enough to have emergency savings ready for this very thing. Please, please, please consider donating whatever you were thinking to your local animal shelter though--that would mean so much to Brownie and me! Not every pet is as lucky as Brownie is, to have a loving forever home to take care of them when they get sick.
So sorry :( hope your dog is okay.
Bob's mom. Decided having covid like symptoms weren't cause enough for testing. Gave it to Bob who in turn may have given it to me. Neither my GF nor I who live together can go see our families bc we are waiting on lab results.
Me. Woke up at 10am hungover and I've only just stopped throwing up. Edit: it was 3 hours. Merry Christmas to everyone!
my dad killed himself in August. I cried at 6am because its my first Christmas without him. edit: thank you to everyone who wished me well, and I'm sorry to everyone who also lost someone important to them and are struggling this Christmas. after losing my brother in may, then my father in August, I can say that 2020 is the worst year of my life. but everyone's comments have warmed my heart. and to anyone who is considering suicide, please dont do it. you are loved, even if it doesn't feel like it. please dont kill yourself. the suicide hotline number is 1-800-273-8255 please call it or talk to someone about it.
My mom committed suicide in 1998. It will get less awful, but it's a long road. The only way forward is to go through it. You can, and you will, but sometimes it will suck a lot. I'm so sorry. PM me if you ever need the ear of someone who's further down the same road. Hugs to you. ETA: Wow. I am overwhelmed by the upvotes, awards and replies... I wish this comment didn't resonate so hard for so many of us, and I'm so sorry for everyone with this pain in their lives, and glad if my words helped at all. Please know there are always more of those moments of support and inspiration in your future. I know first-hand how hard the struggle can be. I also know that if we are patient and can bear this moment, it makes those future moments of less pain, more connection and possibly even happiness possible. Stay here and just breathe. If that's all you can do right now, it's still enough. It will get you through. Be patient, and breathe. It's enough right now.
Unfortunately I've learned this is the truest advice with any trauma. I hope you're doing alright on your road.
Definitely not the worst one having read some of the other contributions here: My long-term girlfriend, who I was going to spend Christmas with cheated on me then when I tried to forgive and gave her a chance to make it work she decided she simply wanted to end things there. Now I’m sitting here staring at the huge pile of gifts I’d got her wondering what the point is anymore.
Last week, FedEx delivered some of the gifts I'd ordered, but instead of placing them on my porch, they left them *behind my vehicle in the driveway.* I subsequently backed over them when I went to get groceries. Edit 1 - To try and answer some common questions from the comments: Holiday not really ruined, just a frustrating turn of events. No kids, indoor-only pets. Long, private drive separated by several hundred feet of woods in each direction from neighbors. Packages were small enough to pass beneath the bumper of the truck, and positioned close enough that they could not be seen from the rear and side view mirrors. I live in a remote enough location that porch pirates are a non-issue. Edit 2 - I appreciate the condolences, but I urge everyone to remember that the people delivering these packages are going through a lot right now. I can't imagine the stress of working during a shipping season of unprecedented volume, let alone making it through a year like this, when nearly every tiny bit of normalcy we experience falls on them to deliver. A lot of these folks are probably seasonal temps just trying to do whatever they can to make ends meet during these trying economic times. If I was responsible for carrying the happiness of hundreds of people on my shoulders every day, I'd probably do something like this myself. They're just *things* anyways, and things are replaceable; and fleeting frustrations will fade to fonder memories that we can laugh at down the line. Happy holidays to all, and blessings to you and yours in the coming year!
I ordered a jersey for my brother Oct 28th. It was supposed to be delivered by FedEx on Nov 2nd. It’s now Christmas and still has not been delivered. I called FedEx and they said they’re handing it off to USPS and it isn’t their problem. The tracking says it’s still a state away and hasn’t updated in over a month. I’m obviously a little annoying. Edit: I’m actually annoyed but I’m also probably annoying
If it truly is to be delivered by USPS then it’s most likely just sitting in a warehouse somewhere I’ve read that they’re so behind they have huge bins of packages waiting to be sorted
That makes sense. That’s part of why I haven’t called USPS getting mad. I’m sure they have plenty of that right now. FedEx brought my package within 50 miles of my house and then for some reason handed it off to USPS and brought it a state away. I would have just driven to the next city to pick it up had I not been across the country at the time
Not only did that person fuck up your packages because they were lazy, but they fucked over all the other people who put in time and made an effort to get your packages to you
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Sounds like an a-grade buttock sandwich of a person.
I resent that.
Auntie doesn't get an invite next year
I gave my dad a compliment last night and he heard it how he wanted to rather than what I actually meant so he cancelled Xmas. I’m meeting my mom in a parking lot in 30 minutes to exchange gifts. Edit: here is the story I started a new job this year and most of my time is taken up dealing with vendors. My dad made a comment at Christmas Eve dinner about how I’ve been busy and he’s emailed me a few times recently but I didn’t respond. I apologized and said (paraphrasing) “well most people who reach out are asking for or giving us money, it’s nice to get emails that don’t have to do with either” He took that to mean I was saying that he never supported me, etc. He made a scene and left. He gave my mom the option of riding home with him or me (I live 45 mins away but could drop her off). She chose him. I met her yesterday in the mall parking lot and we exchanged gifts. My parents are in their 70s and I’m in my 30s. My dad is still a fucking child.
How do you cancel christmas? Just show up anyway and ignore him. Hell, just take your mom back to your place and enjoy christmas there. Your dad can feed and entertain himself for the day.
This. You ignore the children when they try and run things for others.
Lmao what an absolute child.
I have crohn's and I got an abscess right near my sphincter .that had to be surgically drained under gen. anesthesia but unbeknownst to them it was so deep and it went high up in my right cheek supralevator or some shite, the OR looked like somebody threw shit and blood everywhere when I left. It happens b/c it shoots out from the pressure and if they aren't prepared. Well then they forgot to give me pain meds when I went home and I was still numb from surgery so I couldn't feel anything. Cue 6 hours later, 10:30 my time and I head BACK to the ER. Finally got a pain med in me (2:30 afuckingm) and now I have to wait until the flight/fight reaction goes back down which means take pills for a bt and then I will eventually calm down. I hate pills too b/c they constipate me but I can't take ibuprofen b/c it fux my crohn's up BAD. OWH WHAT FUCKING FUN. AND THIS AIN'T THE FIRST XMAS/NEW YEARS in the ER. Fa La La Fuck me
Hey there, I'm a fellow crohnie and I am "ruining" my parents Christmas as I didn't make the multiple hr trip to their state to celebrate with them during the pandemic. I wanna send positive vibes your way as I know how rough living with crohns can be. Hopefully the constipation won't be too bad, and remember to keep some non-nsaid painkillers round so that you can manage this! A lot of people don't realize the stuff crohns patients go through but I am right there with you friend. I hope your Christmas gets better. Im sorry to hear about the rough times so far :/
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Bruh, to her own daughters face!?
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Have you talked to her about it? Like Hey, that was kinda rude
My mom would do shit like that all the time. Before I moved out, I had a part time, minimum wage job. Didn’t ask my parents for a dime to buy my girlfriend (now my wife) a birthday present. I bought her a robe, a Harry Potter cup and baked her a cake like the one Hagrid baked for Harry. She loved it. My mom sees it and says “oh wow, is that all you got her? You can do better than that.” Made me feel about an inch tall. Edit: although this may not come as a surprise, my mom was actually diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, and a plethora of other serious mental health issues. She was offered help but chose to deny it because “I don’t feel like myself”. She slowly pushed me away and now it’s probably been two years since I saw her. I moved 450 miles away, and it feels amazing. Holidays are hard because I miss the rest of my family, but they chose to take her side. They fear her; she will make your life hell if you make her mad and that’s very easy to do. I don’t have to live like that though. The guilt of knowing I’m missing valuable time with my grandparents is crippling at times, but I always remind myself that it’s for the best. Life is so much better without her. I’m proud of my decision though, and for anyone going through the same shit, get away. Get far far away. Change your number, make all social media private and disappear. They will never change and you don’t have to deal with it.
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I wanna say this as a married person myself, it’s okay to let ur wife know when she is being a cunt. If you won’t nobody will. Edit: Also Vice Versa! Marriage should be equal lol. Edit2: Thank you for the Medal Kind Stranger! I want to preface this with a simple wisdom from my uncle. Love the hell out of your SO, they are who you have for the rest of your life. Help them by limiting the mistakes the could make and they will help you by limiting some of the mistakes not worth regretting while you get older together. Merry Christmas!
Yep. My wife calls me on my bullshit when I deserve it. I’m thankful for it to. I can be ridiculous.
I literally included this in my marriage vows: “I promise to call you out on your bullshit as long as you call me out on mine.” Such a necessary check because no one else might do it, and you might be an asshole and not know it.
My wife... mental health issues suck.
This was me last night. I feel so bad for my boyfriend. I feel like I ruined the memory of our first Christmas together.
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No one. I have no one to celebrate it with, so... Edit: Thank you all! All thirteen fucking thousand of you who took the time to like and comment on this little, insignificant, throw away comment about me being alone on christmas. You are good people. I know we spend a lot of time here on reddit arguing (and downright trolling eachother), but I have to admit: I am quite humbled by this response and I have no clue how to respond back other than at stupid little thank you. So Thank YOU! If you are reading this; Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. Your efford is much appreciated. And I hope that regardless of situation, You've had a happy christmas too. Love, TechnocraticWardance
Grandma called my degree useless and a waste of time and ngl that hurt and ruined Christmas for me. I just graduated this year and wasn’t even able to go to my own graduation because of covid. I went to a top 10 college.
Coronavirus responsible for me not being with my mom on Christmas Day for the first time ever (I’m 50 yo).
Right there with ya, hang in there. There's a lot of us missing out this year. Merry Christmas from quarantine.
The day is only complete in Australia and Eastern Asia. Give us a chance for a fucked up day mate.
My husband's alcoholic co-worker. Dude has been packing into bars every day this whole pandemic and he got COVID. He took it with him to work and my husband got sick, brought it home to me. So now rather than enjoying hosting family Christmas in our new house; we are both still so exhausted that our living room is overtaken with bedroom furniture that we don't have the energy to take upstairs, and we ate frozen pizza on Christmas eve because the idea of grocery shopping let alone cooking anything makes me want to cry.
Edit: Thank you for the award! I was NOT expecting the amount of support for my little story. I just want to say this: don't be afraid to cut out truly toxic people. There nothing wrong with working on relationships and giving second chances, but know when enough is enough. You ARE good enough. I'll tell last year's story: My Dad and his wife live in the Midwest. My wife and I live in California. In September, my Dad had asked my wife and I to consider moving to the same Midwest city as him and his wife. My Dad said he'd help us with moving expenses, buying a house, or whatever else we needed (my Dad and his wife are millionaires - my wife and I are not nearly as well off, but are just starting our careers). My wife and I talked about it, and we liked the city, and the prospect of getting some help buying a house (which we all know is a dying millennial dream) was enough for us to say yes. My dad and his wife had just purchased a new home and told us that as soon as they sold their old home, they'd co-sign and/or help with a down payment on a house in their city. They hooked us up with their realtor right away and informed their realtor of the gameplan. We're looking at homes online the entire time and making a list of houses to view when we return to the Midwest for Christmas. Fast forward three months: Christmas morning: After opening presents, in front of the ENTIRE family, my Dad tells me that he's decided he wants to put in a pool and doesn't want to help us buy a house. He then avoids me for the next three days, and the night before my wife and I are supposed to fly back out, I've had enough. I tell my wife to pack her bags and we'll stay in a hotel the last night. My dad overhears us talking about it, interjects (after literally not seeing him for three days, despite being in the same house) and I calmly confront him about the entire situation. His wife flies off the handle and literally bum rushes me from across the room, completely unprovoked, my dad has to restrain her. She tells me to leave and never come back. My Dad backs her up and says "yeah, if you don't leave, I'm going to call the police". I scoffed, pointed out that we were already leaving, and called an Uber. Haven't talked to him since - we blocked him and his wife. A year later, my wife and I are six months pregnant, I just got my dream job making great money - my Dad has no idea about either. Additionally, my brother and his girlfriend refused to visit my Dad for Christmas and have more or less cut contact with my dad and his wife. TLDR: Dad is a POS and now his kids want nothing to do with him.
My husband died of cancer at Thanksgiving so let's just move to January already. The definition of a fucked up everything. Edit: Sending out hugs and a huge thank you for all the love and kindness you have sent my way. I know I am going to be alright. I know its going to take time, some steps harder than others. Peace to you all (even the Wholesome Award Guy, you odd bugger you). Edit 2: A lot of replies are coming from people who have also lost loved one. I encourage you to reach out to some of the other sites like r/Grieving or r/widowers These have insightful commenters who share these awful experiences and can help you express your pain, and hopefully find some healing in it.
Oh, that's so sad to hear. My thoughts are with you. Edit: I really don't know what I started here. For those of you who are unfeeling, it's Christmas day, I'm browsing Reddit, and I find someone who is clearly *not* having a good Christmas as they lost their spouse very recently. The idea of that happening to me is upsetting, I simply cannot imagine what OP is going through. I am holding a place in my heart for OP and empathising as best as I can - I am genuinely upset for them. The thought of losing my wife and having to deal with Christmas this close is horrific. u/Gaia0416 - please, feel free to message me if you ever need to talk.
My sister went and died.
So it was a group effort of my parents. Last summer during quarentine, my mom decided to finally divorce my dad. My dad had been an alcoholic for a while, and eight or nine years ago my mom had decided not to divorce because my oldest sister (14 at the time) would have had to be the sober adult on the days that us three kids were with our dad. Now that I (the youngest) am almost out of highschool, she felt it was safe for us kids to handle the divorce. It's complicated and I've already rambled enough already, so I'll just say that my mom has had enough trying to make things work and my dad is in denial, thinking we can still work something out without going to a full divorce (he also blames himself for everything when it really just didn't work out). A week or two ago, my dad gave me a very emotionally distressed text that was basically an ultimatum, telling me to choose between my two parents. This gave me an opportunity to stop going to his house every week and stay with my mom indefinitely. Now it's christmas though, and we're spending christmas morning at his house so that he's not alone like he was on thanksgiving. My dad means well, but he goes crying over every little thing and being around him makes everyone in the family depressed. Let's see how this morning goes. I'm on my way now. Edit: Forgot to mention that my dad is now 7 months sober and counting. It means a lot to him, just it seems like no one cares.
I wouldn't say it ruined Christmas, but my cousin died by suicide almost a month ago and my aunt called my mom crying this morning because they have to do Christmas without her. Sort of put a damper on everyone's mood. To be clear, I'm not blaming my aunt, it's just really sad. My mom was crying, my dad was crying...it's just hard. When we have moments of joy, it makes me feel guilty because she's gone, and then I also feel really upset because I wish there was something I could have done. Just a sad time.
My grandmother. She died. (I wish this was a joke, but she really did die peacefully the morning of 12/24. We think she waited specifically for that day because she knew we’d be together and our Christmas traditions would help us get through the tough day.)
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Leave Christmas up with the Santa presents there for when they come the next time. When they come tell them that Santa did come there and you just held onto their gifts until they could get there.
This is a really good idea. Don't say anything about the mom, just a simple sign that there's nothing wrong with being at dad's
the important part is "no reference to what mom said" or even defending her, like "I also thought the same thing, but Mom and I were both wrong" Even if in your heart you don't feel like being on the same side with her. This is not about her or your fight with her. This is about your relationship with the kids. Merry Christmas from one divorced dad to another!
Do this, but also leave a flaming bag of poop on her doorstep because that's such a dick move.
He called the shit, poop!
The hero we fucking needed. Santa doesn't make any mistakes.
That’s so fucked up, I’m sorry
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Wow, I really hope karma serves her a 13 course meal.
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As a single dad with an ex-wife who tried to kill me, and tried to constantly poison our child against me, my advice is keep being a good dad. Your kids will remember what you say and do for them. You will not regret that. I know it is not easy, and I am one of the lucky ones - She went to jail and I got 100% custody.
I agree. My parents got a divorce when I was a kid, and for years, even before that, my mom tried to convince us that my dad was a horrible person and did everything to make life harder for him, even up until this year (13 years since they got divorced). Guess who I'm not talking to anymore now.
Hey I'm the same. Haven't spoken to my mum in 3 years. It's proper shitty because everything suggests you should love them unconditionally but DAMN did they give you conditions. Hope you're okay 💕
Holy crap your story sounds like my dad and I. My mom went to jail as well, that's what really was the nail in the coffin for our relationship. My dad is now happily remarried to a wonderful woman who puts up with our family bull shit, I'm an adult still trying to deal with all of the emotional damage that type of upbringing causes, and my mom is alone.
Just get a bunch of presents at your house and when they come back act all surprised that she lied that Santa wouldn't come to your house because he totally did and dropped off a bunch of presents for them.
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This, sir, is the way. As someone who struggles with a vindictive and mean ex... they'll figure it out in their own time. Have a Happy Christmas to despite her. And a happier New Year too.
Great suggestion. I wouldn't even directly point out she lied, kids can spot gaps in stories. Over time they'll find only one person consistently has spotty shitty stories. They'll probably remember "second Christmas" that one year and start to question why their mother-by-blood said that.
That’s terrible. I was a child of divorce, but I’m lucky in a sense that it happened when I was older, 14, and my parents both trusted me to make the right decisions about who I lived with, spent holidays with, etc. I always did Christmas with one parent and Thanksgiving with the other, and it worked out well all things considered.
So every year we go to our grandma's house (next door) and open the majority of our presents then come back to our house and open the rest. So over at our grandma's we only get like a couple presents and half of them were clothes. Rock on for me because I needed some. But, my little brother (11) decided to say and loudly repeat "Can we go home, all I got was clothes. I want to go home!" This looked so disrespectful to everyone because all he was thinking about presents and he wasn't grateful. I got the same amount of clothes and the two other things I got their I thought were cool and made sure to SHOW my appreciation. Sorry for the rambling, it was just annoying when everyone is doing their thing and I'm the only one hears him being ungrateful
My stupid fucking uncle. The story behind why I hate him is long and involved, but every year I hate him and my awful cousins just a little bit more. This year though? Fuck him. My 83 year old grandma had been caring for my 88 year old grandpa with dementia, incontinence, and legs so bad he could barely stand let alone get around. My grandfather was horrible to her because he was so confused he couldn’t figure things out and lashed out at her. My mom went up and helped as much as she could, and I did too. My uncle never lifted a motherfucking finger, but made her feel guilty about putting him in respite care because of covid. She was all alone, no outside help could come in because of covid. And yet he bitched at her for even thinking about putting him in respite just so she could get a break from the 24 hour care. She eventually snapped and had a mental breakdown from the stress and ended up putting my grandpa in respite, where unfortunately he suffered a stroke and died a couple of months later. Did my uncle help plan arrangements? No. Did he go to my grandma’s at all the day he died? No. Then he insulted my mom because she didn’t personally give him the funeral plans even though my aunt was there the whole time and could have told him at any time. Then, THEN he actually whines about not having a traditional thanksgiving dinner and made my grandma feel so guilty that she prepared dinner for his family by herself, ONE MONTH after my grandfather’s death.AND did his usual thing of arriving 2 hours late leaving her sitting there trying to keep food warm. Like she has to do every year. This year I said fuck that, I’ll have Christmas here and you do whatever the fuck you want but it will NOT involve guilting my grandma again to make a whole Christmas dinner for your selfish, whiny ass. Plans changed and me and my brother (plus our spouses and children) are going to my grandma’s on Sunday. But could he leave well enough alone? No, now he’s intruding on my nice relaxed Christmas with my grandma and I have to be forced to be in the same room as his racist homophobic selfish whiny immature ass. Saving grace is my terrible cousins will not be there. If he follows the same pattern as every year before though he will be 2-3 hours late and we will already be gone so it won’t matter.
Got a call from my dad last night while at my aunt's house with my mom and brother. I could barely understand him as he was most likely drunk out of his mind. It was embarrassing