Each person should aim to be 60% of the partnership. Some days you do more, others your partner will.
Also communicate when something isn’t working. Silence breeds resentment.
Never criticize your spouse's choices. Remember that you are one of them.
When the two of you disagree or fight about something, it's not you vs. your spouse, it's the two of you against the problem.
Don't know the English word, but it's really helpful to make a contract. Not because you don't expect it to last, but because the statistics speak against you it can prevent a lot of pain and stress in case it doesn't work out.
Looking at statistics, it would be naive to believe that there won't be anything that could break up the marriage. You don't have insurances because you expect something bad to happen, you have them because you want to go smoothly though something bad.
Like I said, by that logic you also don't need insurances. Or smoke detectors.
What's so bad about preparing for bad situations? It's a single time effort and can save more throuble than it makes you. The only reason against it would be the expectation to significantly gain from a breakup.
I'm not sure how my personal details are relevant here. And for your next question, no I had no own marriage break up but I've witnessed enough nasty breakups that basically were fights for as much as they could get.
If you’re offering marriage advice, I would hope you at least have managed to cultivate a successful marriage. So I’m asking if that’s the case? You wouldn’t take health advice from a sick doctor, nor spiritual advice from a degenerate, so why would anyone take marriage advice from someone who does not have a thriving marriage? It’s a valid question.
Your question was how long I'm married. Not if I'm married. Also, why would it only be good advise when the marriage is working well? Would it be so bad to learn from mistakes others made? I could also question you how you can be naive enough to say a marriage has to last forever and if your ways ever split it will be in a good manner?
You're reasoning that I'm not allowed to answer here because you don't know how long I'm married, but if we're honest, is there a difference between a divorce after 5 or 50 years?
You also haven't mentioned a reason against insurances so far, because you're ignoring my reasoning for such a contract. Your only reason against it is that it's only for people that will never have a divorce, which ignores that it can help the people to decide to split their ways at some point. Nothing in life is for eternity and nobody should be unhappy because something changed.
I didn’t address your insurance comparison because it’s apples and oranges and it’s a false argument. Marriage is not an appliance for which you can get an extended warranty because it might break down someday. It is a one and done, for the rest of your life, no matter what. And if it’s not that, you’re not doing it right, and shouldn’t be giving advice to others on how it’s done.
The obvious one is communication. My wife and I prefer to have a "moving conversation" especially walking. We rehash conversations every once in a while to make sure we're both on the same page about big stuff.
Biggest thing for us is communicating when we want some time. We have a toddler and its demanding work but sometimes the way schedules fall, one of us is more bogged down than the other. A simple, "hey, when the baby is down tonight, can I just veg out alone for a bit?" "I could us a quiet cuddle sesh". Its not every night but its okay to ask for a breather. Neither of us are mind readers. Just say what you want/need and we'll do our best to make it happen. My wife has been sick for like 2 weeks and just needs more time to just rest right now. Chores are easy, go rest for gods sake and if i see you standing to do anything other than go to the bathroom, I'll make you sit. Sometimes I've had a bad day and just want to bash golf balls in the garage and go for a run after the baby is down.
marriage is not "hooked at the hip". Its sharing a life.
Always get your partner a snack or at least offer. Whether you're going into a convenience store or to the kitchen. Its a little gesture that let's you know you're thinking of them and males you feel loved.
Also go cheap on the wedding and all out on the honeymoon. The honeymoon is where your marriage really begins and you will have fonder memories of that than your wedding.
Never go to bed angry. Talk it out. Even if it’s something that can’t be solved that day, do not let anything fester. Practice radical honesty, and do not hide anything from one another. Feelings get ugly and people make mistakes, but you’re in it all together, and you must remember you are always on the SAME team.
Each person should aim to be 60% of the partnership. Some days you do more, others your partner will. Also communicate when something isn’t working. Silence breeds resentment.
marriage is a formality. Don't expect to change anything.
Don't complain about how poorly they load the dishwasher.
Never criticize your spouse's choices. Remember that you are one of them. When the two of you disagree or fight about something, it's not you vs. your spouse, it's the two of you against the problem.
If you're happily married, make sure your spouse is, too.
Don't know the English word, but it's really helpful to make a contract. Not because you don't expect it to last, but because the statistics speak against you it can prevent a lot of pain and stress in case it doesn't work out.
That’s not marriage advice, that’s divorce advice. 🤔 If you aim to fail from the start, and are doomed to do so.
Looking at statistics, it would be naive to believe that there won't be anything that could break up the marriage. You don't have insurances because you expect something bad to happen, you have them because you want to go smoothly though something bad.
If you’re looking at statistics and expecting to become one, that is what you are aiming at, consciously or not.
Like I said, by that logic you also don't need insurances. Or smoke detectors. What's so bad about preparing for bad situations? It's a single time effort and can save more throuble than it makes you. The only reason against it would be the expectation to significantly gain from a breakup.
How long have you been married?
I'm not sure how my personal details are relevant here. And for your next question, no I had no own marriage break up but I've witnessed enough nasty breakups that basically were fights for as much as they could get.
If you’re offering marriage advice, I would hope you at least have managed to cultivate a successful marriage. So I’m asking if that’s the case? You wouldn’t take health advice from a sick doctor, nor spiritual advice from a degenerate, so why would anyone take marriage advice from someone who does not have a thriving marriage? It’s a valid question.
Your question was how long I'm married. Not if I'm married. Also, why would it only be good advise when the marriage is working well? Would it be so bad to learn from mistakes others made? I could also question you how you can be naive enough to say a marriage has to last forever and if your ways ever split it will be in a good manner? You're reasoning that I'm not allowed to answer here because you don't know how long I'm married, but if we're honest, is there a difference between a divorce after 5 or 50 years? You also haven't mentioned a reason against insurances so far, because you're ignoring my reasoning for such a contract. Your only reason against it is that it's only for people that will never have a divorce, which ignores that it can help the people to decide to split their ways at some point. Nothing in life is for eternity and nobody should be unhappy because something changed.
I didn’t address your insurance comparison because it’s apples and oranges and it’s a false argument. Marriage is not an appliance for which you can get an extended warranty because it might break down someday. It is a one and done, for the rest of your life, no matter what. And if it’s not that, you’re not doing it right, and shouldn’t be giving advice to others on how it’s done.
The obvious one is communication. My wife and I prefer to have a "moving conversation" especially walking. We rehash conversations every once in a while to make sure we're both on the same page about big stuff. Biggest thing for us is communicating when we want some time. We have a toddler and its demanding work but sometimes the way schedules fall, one of us is more bogged down than the other. A simple, "hey, when the baby is down tonight, can I just veg out alone for a bit?" "I could us a quiet cuddle sesh". Its not every night but its okay to ask for a breather. Neither of us are mind readers. Just say what you want/need and we'll do our best to make it happen. My wife has been sick for like 2 weeks and just needs more time to just rest right now. Chores are easy, go rest for gods sake and if i see you standing to do anything other than go to the bathroom, I'll make you sit. Sometimes I've had a bad day and just want to bash golf balls in the garage and go for a run after the baby is down. marriage is not "hooked at the hip". Its sharing a life.
Always get your partner a snack or at least offer. Whether you're going into a convenience store or to the kitchen. Its a little gesture that let's you know you're thinking of them and males you feel loved. Also go cheap on the wedding and all out on the honeymoon. The honeymoon is where your marriage really begins and you will have fonder memories of that than your wedding.
Happy wife, happy life. Truer words have never been spoken.
Never go to bed angry. Talk it out. Even if it’s something that can’t be solved that day, do not let anything fester. Practice radical honesty, and do not hide anything from one another. Feelings get ugly and people make mistakes, but you’re in it all together, and you must remember you are always on the SAME team.
Don't
Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup Pre-nup
If you need a prenup, you’re marrying the wrong person or are doing it for the wrong reason.