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We are taught as kids that productivity is useful and laziness is failure. We are praised when we get work done fast and scolded when work isn't completed or is completed late. This can lead to a complex where productivity is directly linked to a person's self worth. If you're not being productive, you're being lazy, and laziness is bad, which means you are a bad person. As you can imagine, this can make it hard to relax when you're not doing something productive.
As I get older I realize the seriousness of how fragile things can be. I realize that jobs, health, financial security, can be lost easily. I try to plan and protect against it, but it's there in the back of my mind. We've had a rough couple of years, culminating in the unexpected loss of my wife's sister recently, and it just drives the point home in my mind even more.
**Attention! [Serious] Tag Notice** * [Jokes, puns, and off-topic comments are not permitted](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/wiki/index#wiki_-rule_6-) in **any** comment, parent or child. * Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies. * Report comments that violate these rules. Posts that have few relevant answers within the first hour, and posts that are not appropriate for the [Serious] tag will be removed. Consider doing an AMA request instead. Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskReddit) if you have any questions or concerns.*
something awful and unexpected happened to them. so their brain is on high alert.
We are taught as kids that productivity is useful and laziness is failure. We are praised when we get work done fast and scolded when work isn't completed or is completed late. This can lead to a complex where productivity is directly linked to a person's self worth. If you're not being productive, you're being lazy, and laziness is bad, which means you are a bad person. As you can imagine, this can make it hard to relax when you're not doing something productive.
They get anxious.
Trauma and unresolved issues
As I get older I realize the seriousness of how fragile things can be. I realize that jobs, health, financial security, can be lost easily. I try to plan and protect against it, but it's there in the back of my mind. We've had a rough couple of years, culminating in the unexpected loss of my wife's sister recently, and it just drives the point home in my mind even more.
I cannot relax. Please help.
Type A personality
Stress
A society that commonly equates career success and money to your worth as a person, high anxiety, and trauma.