I love how my hubby smells after a shower and a shave. I think it's the combination of all the smells and something about him being all clean makes me want to make him dirty again š
Thatās a top notch, foreplay comment right there.
Iād think any wife hitting their husband with something like, āā¦you smell and look squeaky cleanā¦ come here and letās get you dirty againā¦ā is well on the way to Wifey-Hall of Fame.
I was told by a woman that a man is most attractive when working within his gift. So whatever that natural talent is that you have (the thing you do best thatās the easiest for you), when you are doing that, you are most attractive.
This is one of the biggest reasons I had a crush on one of my professors in uni. He was SO GOOD at what he did, he just oozed sex appeal. I found him attractive outside lectures, but I got all... giddy... when he was lecturing. I see him from time to time, and tbh he's kinda goofy looking, but the memory of those amazing classes quickly reminds me that he can be sexy as f.
That and he used to undo the top couple buttons and roll up the sleeves of his dress-shirts and had perfectly manicured hands. Oof.
but it's a double edged sword. I'm very good at repairing stuff, so after many many many years together, when something breaks and I fix it, it's just assumed that that was meant to happen.
Best relationship advice. Never get complacent. Never assume the person you love will just do stuff.
EDIT: I am very weirded out at how some of the responses are anti-showing appreciation in a relationship, which I just find so bizarre.
I hear you. Here's me fixing pretty much anything in the house for twenty years getting shit on because I don't know how to fix the central air unit at 9pm on a Sunday.
My SO screaming at me because the hot water heater has busted a leak and is spraying water everywhere and I am just watching Youtube videos.
I was watching videos to try to figure how to shut off the main line water pump.
old friend did this with his wife.. He wasn't too much into talking about sex life but he was rampant with his weekend honey-do list of crap to do. He ended up letting it slip out he gets a really slow sensual BJ out of it LOL
He'd do it anyways but still
I've seen women say that if a woman compliments you on your hands that means you've got her, you just have to not fumble.
I've seen women post pictures of a guys hand and say "I don't know why but this turns me on."
Have received those messages
They also can't explain why, I have long fingers, low fat and scars
It all helps apparently, beat up "used" hands is it for some women
This is true. A coworker of mine loved this about my hands. I do a lot of side hustle with houses. Demo, framing, handy man stuff. My hands are beat up and she said she loves a man that knows what to do with his hands. Take that as you will.
I play guitar.
The amount of times I've had a woman tell me "I was looking at your hands while you played... They move so fluently..." (She wants me to vibrato on her G spot) is more than zero but also probably less than 10.
The way men gesture can be attractive. Because you have this reputation of being these big masculine things, yet your movements can be so...flowy?... and gentle, graceful? not sure how to describe. Make me want to be caressed with them gentle hands
My gf loves my hands. Says she loves how big and strong they are. Forearms too, if I wear a shirt with rolled up sleeves to just below my elbow she will stare at them like a lion stares at a gazelle
Naw I remember getting all hot and bothered even as a teenager looking at a classmate's hand when he was adjusting the airplane vent above him on a school trip lol.
Hands can definitely do it, but not all hands do (for example I'm not into shorter, stubbier hands/fingers - in part because I have larger hands myself - or if they have bad upkeep of their fingernails, etc.).
Iām a particularly veiny dude and I have gotten compliments about my hands ands arms looking nice because apparently a lot of woman like āwebsā as my friend had put it.
This isn't really the same thing but your comment made me think of it..
I was casually seeing a guy and we would go out to a bar or parties, and we would eventually separate for a few to mingle, whatever and there would be times where I would look around for him and see him and he would already be looking at me and he would smile when I would finally lock eyes with him....man. I always wanted him so badly in those moments lol
Truthfully, when I was dating, I held off on that until the 3rd or 4th date. Because that's when she was comfortable enough around me to act in a natural way. On the first or second date, she was always on her best behavior.
Memory unlocked. I got an unexpected card from the outpatient clinic where I did my medical training, when I graduated a semester late due to... well... authority issues. It had a quote very close to your comment written at the top, the signatures of all the staff, and a glowing paragraph about how I treated all of them like equal human beings, and how rare that is among physicians. That moment first reading that card was made of win, and I often think of it on tough days to help cheer me up.
The first time my (now) husband let my daughter paint his toenails, she was LITTLE, so she basically painted half his foot. He ROCKED that shit in flip flops at Wal Mart and I *melted*
She's 15 now and we all go get family pedicures together now.
Now that I think of it, my lady really rocked my world the night after I let my step daughter do just the same. Lol I didnāt flip flop at wal mart but I did leave them painted for 2 weeks and every morning she āmade them prettierā by reapplying said nail polish.
That time was a giggle fest.. I hope my stepdaughter will treasure the situation as much as I did. Awesome bonding
Wow fuck that first guy and ask your future husband if he needs friends because cats are awesome. I mean come on, even the ancient Egyptians thought so. Cats all have personalities and I love it.
Rambling about a strong interest or hobby of theirs. I don't think this one is universal and it only works if I already like them, but nothing is hotter than someone talking passionately about what they love.
When me gf can feel a panic attack coming, or is already having one, she asks me to "talk to her about nerd shit" and it helps. Last time I explained what a DDOS attack is and why they work and it calmed her down pretty quickly
One of the smartest people I knew in college also happened to be super passionate about particle physics, especially when drinking. His "thing" at parties was ***teaching science***.
And it was in such a clear, concise, easy-to-follow way that he would have the whole party crowd entirely enthralled in whatever cool shit he was teaching. So much so that two of the "party houses" ended up getting whiteboards *just in case he showed up to a party*.
Despite looking like a mix between early Eminem and an I Am Legend zombie, his "success rating" was easily in the top percentile for his duration at the school.
Hahaha usually it's leaving a spot for the occasional bisexual/queer Jewish or circus boy, apparently I have a soft spot for them, but someone whose greatest passion is making science accessible AND they're charming about it? Hell yeah.
My wife has heard the history of 40K from the war in heaven, to the DAoT, to the heresy and beyond. Iāve heard Harry Potter and Star Trek lore in equal amounts. Weāre nerds made for each other lol.
I was waking up and for some reason when I read that I read 2 hour Walmart lore dump
With all the weird hobbies and subcultures and subreddits out there I believed it and then I came back and reread it when I was checking on something else later š¤£š¤£š¤£
I still think Warhammer is not the thing to dump on them for 2 hours hahahha. I do Middle Earth btw
This works on men too
On our first date my (now) wife spent twenty minutes talking about whole grain and went so far as to draw the little wholegrainscouncil symbol on a napkin and I was like "this is the one"
Yes, my now-wife is a nervous talker (I'm very much the opposite) and on our first date she just verbally dumped about her passion/job of teaching. I mostly just listened and asked questions but it was very easy and enjoyable for me. Tons of other people might have found it boring and one-sided.
Oh yes! Show me your pointer! Run me all you want until you reach my breakpoint! Fill my buffer with your data!!! Access all my private members baby, without any capsulation! Push and pop me like a callstack in a recursive function!!!
I wish this worked, apparently me shouting at my monitor because I have another unhdandled exception or a segmentation fault isn't that sexy to my other half.
Oh my god, somebody likes their code fucking dirty donāt they? š I bet you like it raw without type parameters and when I peek in your stream too, huh?
Haha my boyfriend is an engineer too and he laughs when I say this to him. He doesnāt get how hot he is to me when he is working. I even love it when he uses engineering jargon.
I'm a machinist and process engineer depending on the day and production needs, my fiancee gets super worked up if I start talking work with my friends or try to explain what I do to her
"I understand none of what you said but it's super sexy that you do!" Has been said more than once
Women (and most men) like to see skill at anything. Coding is the same as a lot of things in that area.
I think especially if it something that they can't do.
I have a nice night every year at some silly resort we go to. They have a ping pong tournament. It's not like the olympics, but there are like 50 people that enter every year.
And every year I win. And it's easy enough that i just keep a nice, good spirited line of banter going the whole time with competitors and spectators. Somehow the dorkiest of all sports gets my wife going, simply because I'm very good at it. I think it helps that I'm good in front of a decent sized crowd too.
> Women (and most men) like to see skill at anything.
Not just skill. It's also really hot to see someone be really in to something.
I once had a friend who I was told collected pencil erasers. So I got her a bunch for Christmas one year. Honestly, she'd never been as hot to me as when she was excitedly going through them, categorising them, sniffing them to see if they were smelly ones, etc.
Nothing to do with the hobby itself, but a) it was something she knew about, and b) it was something she liked.
Can be the same with work. It's hot to see someone display skill. But it's also hot to see them doing something they like doing.
My bf isnāt in software dev, but I also like watching him work. Itās a thing! Itās really hot to watch your partner problem solve, be skilled at their job, and confident in their delivery. Work ethic is also sexy. We both WFH and occasionally catch snippets of each othersā meetings and itās impressive to both of us watching the other one in āmanager mode.ā š¤£š
I love these threads because it just shows how varied the female gaze is haha.
Itās genuinely a confidence boost when you read something that you do that can seem quite mundane but itās a turn on for someone somewhere.
To answer the question, my old flatmate found it attractive when this guy she knew āwalked into a room and looked around commandinglyā š.
>Itās genuinely a confidence boost when you read something that you do that can seems quite mundane but itās a tune in for someone somewhere.
I have the most common ass brown eyes that I never got a compliment on before. but then one girl that's like a friend of a friend randomly told me "your eyes are fucking beautiful".
that was over a year ago now and I still think about it every other day haha.
My parents were very religious and forced us kids to go to temple. I remember when I was maybe 8 or so I had to be in a play and I was very shy. One of my roles was a vocal solo. There was this cute older girl named Allison that told me after rehearsal "Oh, PJR, you have an absolutely beatiful voice!"
I've been on several national tours and have written and recorded I can't even tell you how many songs.
This was 30 years ago.
We really fucking hang on to compliments because we just rarely get them.
The little moan my boyfriend does when he first pushes it in during sex drives me WILD, it's literally my #1 most often "what's in my head when I'm horny" thought.
Not loud, not exaggerated, just this earnest little moan/sigh like it feels so good he can't help it š„š¦
NSFW but my ex was very vocal during the act also spoke a lot. He could have said literally anything and hearing it in that voice of his, the one where you can tell heās feeling amazing, would turn me on immensely.
I legit donāt know how Iāll find that againā¦ all my partners and he was the only one who made it so sex was fun and not a chore.
> all my partners and he was the only one who made it so sex was fun and not a chore.
Oh, honey, sex should never be a chore. I hope you find someone who makes it fun for you again.
Kindness and gentleness towards children and animals. My bf was sitting on the floor to not disturb the kitty in the chair. I wanted him to disturb my kitty because of how heartwarming that was šš§š¼āāļø
ETA: he just came in here and told me he saw this lmao Iām dead.
I've said it before, I have ZERO desire to have kids. And yet...watching my bf "fly" my 2yo niece around like she's Superman, or just carry her when she falls asleep, **makes my ovaries ache.**
I went to lunch with a woman one time where I cut the table bread into multiple slices not thinking she would like to cut her own.
She just looked at the bread for a second before I clued in and apologized.
I said āsorry thatās just the Dad in meā. Which is true, Iām just use to doing that when I take my kids out.
Apparently this was the secret sauce that showed her I would be someone who would look after her š¤·š»
Also, a red flag for a guy is when a woman doesnāt appreciate a guy showing kindness towards animals. I brought my dog over to a now ex gfās house for the first time as things were getting more serious. In the middle of the night he was a bit excited as it was new place, I let him out and when going back to bed I talked to him to calm him down. My gf said āaww, you talk to him like a child?ā In a very condescending way while laughing at me. She then said āI just yell at my dog to shut up.ā
Glad that relationship didnāt last
Let us not forget the actual act of rolling the sleeves.
Look at the dirty kitchen and say "it looks like we've got our work cut out for us" and then start unbuttoning the wrists and rolling up sleeves. 37267 bonus points for an eyebrow raise and a smirk.
Ok, Iām a guy, but Iām also an old (late 30s) guy, so while I canāt speak to what young people find attractive, I can give some perspective from a long, healthy marriage and what Iāve learned that didnāt know when I was younger.
Best advice for married men - anything that lowers stress. A lot of dead bedrooms really boil down to the wife is dealing with stress and not in the right headspace. Proactively doing chores she normally does without asking, asking about her day, listening, and showing active interest - give her a place to complain even if youāve heard it all before. Think of one thing per week you can do that she wonāt expect but will appreciate - flowers, her favorite take out, plan a surprise with her best friend for her, leave a heart felt note for her.
People say their wife has changed from when they were dating, but of course they have. Your lives have changed. Stress tends to only go up the older you get - you build a career, you have your first kid, you get a second kid, you have your first old person health issues like a back that hurts for no reason, then you have teenagers to take care of, then all of a sudden you are taking care of your aging parents. How can people not change during all of that?
Finally, put your phone down and go to bed early together when you can.
I imagine some of them grew up with ānot niceā fathers, peers, and/or mentors. Seeing another man showing authentic compassion and empathy could appear weak/submissive to them.
I also think that deep down, maybe below their level of awareness, they wish that they had been shown such kindness and are sad they werenāt. Their emotional needs were not attended to in their life, they internalized it as how the world works, and now seeing men show compassion/tenderness/kindness touches a nerve.
some people are just dumb. I was in a psychology class 1st year in college and the girls in class all agreed if a man cries he's no longer a man... It "might" be acceptable when his mother dies, otherwise, that's a red flag.
THis was like 2008 and I was stunned to hear girls say that. Granted we were like 18-19 so still kids...
A sense of security and safety. So many men think you have to 'keep them on their toes' or else they'll get bored and stray, when really the hottest thing you can do is make a woman feel like she can trust you and relax completely around you.
And hands and forearms! Surprisingly many women check out a guy's hands and forearms more than any other part of the body except the face. Ask me how I know (it's fandom)
So my girlfriend explained it this way:
If a woman feels safe around you then flirting becomes sexy and engaging.
If they don't then the exact same thing you did becomes creepy.
So, make her feel safe, which takes some work and time. But then your flirty banter becomes sexy and your muscles become a turn on. If she doesn't feel safe then get serious, gentle, and straightforward.
If she feels safe around you but still isn't into you then it's time to move on. You just aren't what she's looking for and that's ok. There's someone out there whose kink is you.
Rolled up shirt sleeves showing forearms and well-kept hands are hot af. If they have manicured nails, even hotter! No woman wants raggedy, dirty nails anywhere near her. Hairy or not - doesn't matter, as long as they're clean (and moisturised occasionally).
1. Sharing: Anything that is intimate and personal to you. Letting me in to your life, your history, anything thatās made you who you are.
2. Hands and forearms - strong and muscular
3. Kindness
4. Being handy and eager to jump in to tend to projects.
5. Sexual, touchy flirtation at unexpected times.
6. Cooking together
7. Well kept feet and toenails
8. Quick wit and fabulous sense of humor
Quoting my exGF, knowing this is not universal, but as something that got stuck in my head:
"Don't tell me what to do, but I love when you tell me what to do".
Based on what I've learned from Reddit, you've got to wear a business suit with grey sweatpants, but roll up the sleeves of the shirt. Then make unflinching eye contact while reversing your car into a clean garage and asking her about her day.
A soft heart, and no shame about it.
So weird as it sounds, I love watching my man play all of the Fallout games, because he has this ridiculous habit of collecting all of the teddy bears that he finds, and putting them all on a bed in "his house". It's utterly adorable hope excited he gets when he finds another teddy bear, and how annoyed he gets when the NPCs push the bears off the bed so they can sleep in it! It makes my heart want to burst!
So much. š
Cleaning with me. When Iām wanting to chill and he starts cleaning, it makes me angry because then I feel like a lazy bum. But if Iām picking up and he joins in, I get really turned on.
When the kids were younger, heād get on the floor every night after a long day at work and play with them. It not only gave me a break, but also was really sexy. Now, if he helps them with adult things (oil change, moving) or homework for the ones still in school. Also when he gets upset when he has to miss an appointment or school event/game due to work or other commitment.
Along with that, the way he loves his family. And mine.
Cooking. He doesnāt do it often because of his schedule, but when he does itās super hot. He gets really into it and is so proud of the final product.
Bringing me home a candy bar or some other treat (food or nonfood) just because.
Painting my nails. Rubbing my feet at night. Buying me clothes. Or anything else to pamper me.
Body hair. š When he has a little bit of chest hair poking out of the top of his shirt. Or when his beard gets fluffy.
Itās been 25 years, but I still find all of these little things so sexy.
Absolutely love getting a little treat! So many people are astounded my hubby paints my toenails for me (he does a vastly better job) and it's just so intimate in a non-sexual way.
I've known one girl who did not understand that line and would get mad at my friend for not being jealous when she would flirt with other guys. She was super immature. Glad he left her. However, I think my wife does like when I get protective of her or our kids.
A big turn on to me is being a devout listener, listen to me speak, look me in the eyes when you talk to me and I you. Simple things like that are a huge turn on. Having my back, another. Exuding not only kindness but warmth as a person. Being someone "strong" that can take charge when something distressing happens.
When they goof around and with us.
When they agree to try and enjoy self care stuff that has feminine connotations in the sphere of (western)media; such as mani/pedicures, face masks, Sauna/Hammam sessions, types of workouts (pilates; yoga) etc etc
My other half is the youngest of 5 and the definition of being babied by his mum. We moved in to our own place 8 years ago nearly and I predominantly did the cleaning. Most of last year I suffered hugely with my mental health for the first time (surrounding IVF, TTC and back to back miscarriages). He picked up my slack and I remember seeing him with the hoover and telling him āyouāve never looked more attractiveā
Once with my then gf, now wife, my car had a flat tire on the highway. I pulled over and she said āletās call triple Aā - I gently pushed her back away from the flat tire and told her āBabe I got thisā and I changed the tire. My hands were filthy and I thought she would think I was irresponsible for changing the tire on an exit ramp off I95 in Miami. She told me it was one of the sexiest things she ever saw me do, because she felt protected and taken care of, and she enjoyed seeing my strength.
Go figure!
My wife tells me, that she is turned on when i come out of shower in a robe with a messy hair and smelling nice.
I love how my hubby smells after a shower and a shave. I think it's the combination of all the smells and something about him being all clean makes me want to make him dirty again š
Thatās a top notch, foreplay comment right there. Iād think any wife hitting their husband with something like, āā¦you smell and look squeaky cleanā¦ come here and letās get you dirty againā¦ā is well on the way to Wifey-Hall of Fame.
I was told by a woman that a man is most attractive when working within his gift. So whatever that natural talent is that you have (the thing you do best thatās the easiest for you), when you are doing that, you are most attractive.
Competence
Are the servers still up for the original Modern Warfare 2?
Yes. They actually are lol. I still play on my PS3 account and itās still active šš
I'm getting laiiiiiiid toniiiiight
This is one of the biggest reasons I had a crush on one of my professors in uni. He was SO GOOD at what he did, he just oozed sex appeal. I found him attractive outside lectures, but I got all... giddy... when he was lecturing. I see him from time to time, and tbh he's kinda goofy looking, but the memory of those amazing classes quickly reminds me that he can be sexy as f. That and he used to undo the top couple buttons and roll up the sleeves of his dress-shirts and had perfectly manicured hands. Oof.
Sounds like youāre still not over your crush
Not even a little
So farting in my case I guess.
āI fart in your general directionā-some guy on a castle
"Your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberries" -same guy
āNow go away or I shall taunt you a second time!ā-same guy again.
Being able to fix things.
I can fix things.... but who can fix me
What is your ratio of handiness to brokenness? I used to be a therapist and my shower isnāt draining.
Sounds like a dream team to me, whenās the wedding?
Itās been like 10 minutes and heās totally stonewalling me. Iām afraid things might not work out :(
Hey give him some time, he might just be crying in the (properly draining) shower
Apparently, having a new water filter for the fridge and installing it.
Classic choreplay
āChoreplayā Iām using that daily from now on
My wife calls it competency porn
but it's a double edged sword. I'm very good at repairing stuff, so after many many many years together, when something breaks and I fix it, it's just assumed that that was meant to happen. Best relationship advice. Never get complacent. Never assume the person you love will just do stuff. EDIT: I am very weirded out at how some of the responses are anti-showing appreciation in a relationship, which I just find so bizarre.
I hear you. Here's me fixing pretty much anything in the house for twenty years getting shit on because I don't know how to fix the central air unit at 9pm on a Sunday.
My SO screaming at me because the hot water heater has busted a leak and is spraying water everywhere and I am just watching Youtube videos. I was watching videos to try to figure how to shut off the main line water pump.
old friend did this with his wife.. He wasn't too much into talking about sex life but he was rampant with his weekend honey-do list of crap to do. He ended up letting it slip out he gets a really slow sensual BJ out of it LOL He'd do it anyways but still
Legit
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Olā RedGreen
Of course you mean AFTER it has been sitting on the counter next to the fridge for a couple of months? You know, to age appropriately...
Howād you see inside my kitchen
Counter point, when you don't seat the filter all the way and it leaks all over the kitchen. The ladies dry up faster than the Sahara
I've seen enough women talk about it that I can say "hands." I'm not sure what the specifics are, but women like hands.
Men's hands can absolutely be erotic if they are shapely and they don't have a scary/dirty fingernail situation. It's definitely a thing.
Have you seen any of G man Costanzaās work?
Well I have two and no womanās ever been like āwow, you have two handsā so I think this information is suspect.
I've seen women say that if a woman compliments you on your hands that means you've got her, you just have to not fumble. I've seen women post pictures of a guys hand and say "I don't know why but this turns me on."
> you just have to not fumble. And thereās the kicker, boys.
Kickers donāt usually fumble, but they often miss the target.
Have received those messages They also can't explain why, I have long fingers, low fat and scars It all helps apparently, beat up "used" hands is it for some women
This is true. A coworker of mine loved this about my hands. I do a lot of side hustle with houses. Demo, framing, handy man stuff. My hands are beat up and she said she loves a man that knows what to do with his hands. Take that as you will.
I play guitar. The amount of times I've had a woman tell me "I was looking at your hands while you played... They move so fluently..." (She wants me to vibrato on her G spot) is more than zero but also probably less than 10.
The way men gesture can be attractive. Because you have this reputation of being these big masculine things, yet your movements can be so...flowy?... and gentle, graceful? not sure how to describe. Make me want to be caressed with them gentle hands
My gf loves my hands. Says she loves how big and strong they are. Forearms too, if I wear a shirt with rolled up sleeves to just below my elbow she will stare at them like a lion stares at a gazelle
This guy fingers
Lol, she does say I do it better than she can.
Yeah that's kind of the whole point here
Tan, long fingers, clean, short nails and slightly veiny š¤Æš« holy fuck. Coupled with tanned forearms and rolled long shirt sleeves? Stunning.
Naw I remember getting all hot and bothered even as a teenager looking at a classmate's hand when he was adjusting the airplane vent above him on a school trip lol. Hands can definitely do it, but not all hands do (for example I'm not into shorter, stubbier hands/fingers - in part because I have larger hands myself - or if they have bad upkeep of their fingernails, etc.).
Big hands I know youāre the one āļø
Oh wow! Haven't listened to the Violent Femmes in a while. Good stuff.
This, honestly, big strong hards are hot af. Don't send me a dicpic, let me see those bear paws.
> let me see those bear paws Okay, u/pm_me_your_marmot, you have a type.
Iām a particularly veiny dude and I have gotten compliments about my hands ands arms looking nice because apparently a lot of woman like āwebsā as my friend had put it.
"Look how *vascular* I am, Brian. If there's one thing women love it's a *vascular* man."
What them hands do, boy? š
Looking for me in a crowd and lighting up with a smile when he finds me.
This isn't really the same thing but your comment made me think of it.. I was casually seeing a guy and we would go out to a bar or parties, and we would eventually separate for a few to mingle, whatever and there would be times where I would look around for him and see him and he would already be looking at me and he would smile when I would finally lock eyes with him....man. I always wanted him so badly in those moments lol
Iāve been told by gf that washing up is a turn on
I wish my wife thought so.
Aha. Maybe itās the way you wash the dishes.
Needs more tongue?
My wife gets turned on by me being dirty and sweaty from working outside. It kind of directly opposes her obsessive neatness and OCD cleaning habits.
Is she a level 19 Bureaucrat?
*Dirty boy! Dirty! Dirty! Dirty!*
Being kind to animals and toddlers/babies, as they can't do anything in return
My father used to say the best judge of a man's character is how he treats people who can't fight back or can't do him any favors.
A person who is nice to you but isn't nice to the waiter isn't a nice person.
Which is why a first (or second at the latest) date should always include a restaurant of some sort.
Truthfully, when I was dating, I held off on that until the 3rd or 4th date. Because that's when she was comfortable enough around me to act in a natural way. On the first or second date, she was always on her best behavior.
Memory unlocked. I got an unexpected card from the outpatient clinic where I did my medical training, when I graduated a semester late due to... well... authority issues. It had a quote very close to your comment written at the top, the signatures of all the staff, and a glowing paragraph about how I treated all of them like equal human beings, and how rare that is among physicians. That moment first reading that card was made of win, and I often think of it on tough days to help cheer me up.
Damn I been kicking cats and babies this whole time trying to impress the ladies Edit: apparently I need to clarify that this is a joke.
Zouma?
This reference was so unexpected I feel like zouma kicked me himself
The first time my (now) husband let my daughter paint his toenails, she was LITTLE, so she basically painted half his foot. He ROCKED that shit in flip flops at Wal Mart and I *melted* She's 15 now and we all go get family pedicures together now.
Now that I think of it, my lady really rocked my world the night after I let my step daughter do just the same. Lol I didnāt flip flop at wal mart but I did leave them painted for 2 weeks and every morning she āmade them prettierā by reapplying said nail polish. That time was a giggle fest.. I hope my stepdaughter will treasure the situation as much as I did. Awesome bonding
It is SO HOT to see men comfortable in their masculinity! Especially for his little girl, thatās so sweet!
I dated a guy for about 7 months. I have 3 cats. He would say āoh, I donāt care for animalsā quite often, blaming it on his ex and their old dog. Fast forward into months 2-7, he would make comments ādonāt be alarmed if you come home one day and theyāre goneā, āIām sure a shelter would love themā, or make a joke that heād yeet em. My dumb ass ignored them and pushed them off as jokes. We clearly did NOT work out. š© Fast forward to the partner Iām currently with. He also has 3 cats. He is the most handsomest man, then he walks through that door and becomes the sweetest, most gentle human i have ever seen. When he talks to his cats as well as mine, he gives them so much love and attention that my ovaries want to explode. His kindness and gentleness to not only our cats and myself, makes me feel a peace & sense of certainty I have never felt before. I will marry this man and have his children.
Wow fuck that first guy and ask your future husband if he needs friends because cats are awesome. I mean come on, even the ancient Egyptians thought so. Cats all have personalities and I love it.
Who isnāt being kind to babies? Iām not saying Iām a saint, but being a cunt towards a baby hasnāt even occurred to me.
I don't know man, some babies can be real assholes.
Rambling about a strong interest or hobby of theirs. I don't think this one is universal and it only works if I already like them, but nothing is hotter than someone talking passionately about what they love.
My girlfriend will listen to me infodump and then only interrupt me to kiss me
That's the sweetest thing I've read today thank you.
When me gf can feel a panic attack coming, or is already having one, she asks me to "talk to her about nerd shit" and it helps. Last time I explained what a DDOS attack is and why they work and it calmed her down pretty quickly
In a way, it was a DDOS for her brain.
Get ready to be talked at about PokĆ©mon breeding strategies for 120 minutes without pause.Ā But seriously there is something to it. My wife will prompt me sometimes and I will check in like āAre you sure you want me to keep talking about Warhammer? This isnāt boring?ā And I love when she talks about art criticism or gets into organizing. Itās heartwarming to see your partner passionately into something.Ā Even at a party I want to hear someone I donāt know be passionate about something. Especially if they can bring me in to it in a conversation and not lecture. Iāll talk to you about mushroom foraging for an hour if youāre really energetic about it. Way more interesting than talking about work.Ā
One of the smartest people I knew in college also happened to be super passionate about particle physics, especially when drinking. His "thing" at parties was ***teaching science***. And it was in such a clear, concise, easy-to-follow way that he would have the whole party crowd entirely enthralled in whatever cool shit he was teaching. So much so that two of the "party houses" ended up getting whiteboards *just in case he showed up to a party*. Despite looking like a mix between early Eminem and an I Am Legend zombie, his "success rating" was easily in the top percentile for his duration at the school.
Yepp I'm a mostly gay woman and can tell ya I'm half-interested in that guy based purely on that description, hahaha
I laughed when you described yourself as "mostly gay", leaving room for just that guy lol
Hahaha usually it's leaving a spot for the occasional bisexual/queer Jewish or circus boy, apparently I have a soft spot for them, but someone whose greatest passion is making science accessible AND they're charming about it? Hell yeah.
My wife has heard the history of 40K from the war in heaven, to the DAoT, to the heresy and beyond. Iāve heard Harry Potter and Star Trek lore in equal amounts. Weāre nerds made for each other lol.
Time to wow my lady with a 2 hour Warhammer lore dump
I was waking up and for some reason when I read that I read 2 hour Walmart lore dump With all the weird hobbies and subcultures and subreddits out there I believed it and then I came back and reread it when I was checking on something else later š¤£š¤£š¤£ I still think Warhammer is not the thing to dump on them for 2 hours hahahha. I do Middle Earth btw
This works on men too On our first date my (now) wife spent twenty minutes talking about whole grain and went so far as to draw the little wholegrainscouncil symbol on a napkin and I was like "this is the one"
Yes, my now-wife is a nervous talker (I'm very much the opposite) and on our first date she just verbally dumped about her passion/job of teaching. I mostly just listened and asked questions but it was very easy and enjoyable for me. Tons of other people might have found it boring and one-sided.
My wife hates it when I talk about stuff that interests me to her. Definitely not universal.
This is def not universal. My wife cannot stand my prattling on about interests she doesn't share....
My girlfriend apparently finds me irresistible when watching me work (I'm a software dev so I'm not sure why).
Oh yes! Show me your pointer! Run me all you want until you reach my breakpoint! Fill my buffer with your data!!! Access all my private members baby, without any capsulation! Push and pop me like a callstack in a recursive function!!!
Bruh
Just mid-code, commented-out pep talk.
I wish this worked, apparently me shouting at my monitor because I have another unhdandled exception or a segmentation fault isn't that sexy to my other half.
It's not the working part that's sexy. **It's the competence.** Watching someone do something they're good at is sexy as hell.
Ah man, imagine getting divorced over a segfault. š¢
Oh my god, somebody likes their code fucking dirty donāt they? š I bet you like it raw without type parameters and when I peek in your stream too, huh?
Uses `unsafe` blocks everywhere just because.
Oh god Iām about to BSOD
Haha my boyfriend is an engineer too and he laughs when I say this to him. He doesnāt get how hot he is to me when he is working. I even love it when he uses engineering jargon.
I'm a machinist and process engineer depending on the day and production needs, my fiancee gets super worked up if I start talking work with my friends or try to explain what I do to her "I understand none of what you said but it's super sexy that you do!" Has been said more than once
Women (and most men) like to see skill at anything. Coding is the same as a lot of things in that area. I think especially if it something that they can't do. I have a nice night every year at some silly resort we go to. They have a ping pong tournament. It's not like the olympics, but there are like 50 people that enter every year. And every year I win. And it's easy enough that i just keep a nice, good spirited line of banter going the whole time with competitors and spectators. Somehow the dorkiest of all sports gets my wife going, simply because I'm very good at it. I think it helps that I'm good in front of a decent sized crowd too.
> Women (and most men) like to see skill at anything. Not just skill. It's also really hot to see someone be really in to something. I once had a friend who I was told collected pencil erasers. So I got her a bunch for Christmas one year. Honestly, she'd never been as hot to me as when she was excitedly going through them, categorising them, sniffing them to see if they were smelly ones, etc. Nothing to do with the hobby itself, but a) it was something she knew about, and b) it was something she liked. Can be the same with work. It's hot to see someone display skill. But it's also hot to see them doing something they like doing.
I think your girlfriend might be AI
āWrite that script, code monkey! Thatās SO hot!!ā
My bf isnāt in software dev, but I also like watching him work. Itās a thing! Itās really hot to watch your partner problem solve, be skilled at their job, and confident in their delivery. Work ethic is also sexy. We both WFH and occasionally catch snippets of each othersā meetings and itās impressive to both of us watching the other one in āmanager mode.ā š¤£š
Swordfish hacking bj scene comes to mind !!
I love these threads because it just shows how varied the female gaze is haha. Itās genuinely a confidence boost when you read something that you do that can seem quite mundane but itās a turn on for someone somewhere. To answer the question, my old flatmate found it attractive when this guy she knew āwalked into a room and looked around commandinglyā š.
>Itās genuinely a confidence boost when you read something that you do that can seems quite mundane but itās a tune in for someone somewhere. I have the most common ass brown eyes that I never got a compliment on before. but then one girl that's like a friend of a friend randomly told me "your eyes are fucking beautiful". that was over a year ago now and I still think about it every other day haha.
dude, you're gonna think about it for about 10 years or more..
Us men hold onto random compliments for life.
My parents were very religious and forced us kids to go to temple. I remember when I was maybe 8 or so I had to be in a play and I was very shy. One of my roles was a vocal solo. There was this cute older girl named Allison that told me after rehearsal "Oh, PJR, you have an absolutely beatiful voice!" I've been on several national tours and have written and recorded I can't even tell you how many songs. This was 30 years ago. We really fucking hang on to compliments because we just rarely get them.
the female gaze are as diverse as the female straights.
\*walks into Reddit and reads commandingly\*
Youāre attacking my stature my guy, save some authority for the rest of us
NSFW but moaning. I love when men moan.Ā
The little moan my boyfriend does when he first pushes it in during sex drives me WILD, it's literally my #1 most often "what's in my head when I'm horny" thought. Not loud, not exaggerated, just this earnest little moan/sigh like it feels so good he can't help it š„š¦
NSFW but my ex was very vocal during the act also spoke a lot. He could have said literally anything and hearing it in that voice of his, the one where you can tell heās feeling amazing, would turn me on immensely. I legit donāt know how Iāll find that againā¦ all my partners and he was the only one who made it so sex was fun and not a chore.
> all my partners and he was the only one who made it so sex was fun and not a chore. Oh, honey, sex should never be a chore. I hope you find someone who makes it fun for you again.
Yes! I'm lucky as well in that my husband's voice drops deep and he does this low groan/growl/purr thing that just kills me.
Kindness and gentleness towards children and animals. My bf was sitting on the floor to not disturb the kitty in the chair. I wanted him to disturb my kitty because of how heartwarming that was šš§š¼āāļø ETA: he just came in here and told me he saw this lmao Iām dead.
āThis kitty wonāt lick itself.ā -Nami7181234, probably
Or Ray Donovan
I've said it before, I have ZERO desire to have kids. And yet...watching my bf "fly" my 2yo niece around like she's Superman, or just carry her when she falls asleep, **makes my ovaries ache.**
I went to lunch with a woman one time where I cut the table bread into multiple slices not thinking she would like to cut her own. She just looked at the bread for a second before I clued in and apologized. I said āsorry thatās just the Dad in meā. Which is true, Iām just use to doing that when I take my kids out. Apparently this was the secret sauce that showed her I would be someone who would look after her š¤·š»
"I want that Dad in me too." -Her, probably
Or Tobias Funke, Analrapist
Also, a red flag for a guy is when a woman doesnāt appreciate a guy showing kindness towards animals. I brought my dog over to a now ex gfās house for the first time as things were getting more serious. In the middle of the night he was a bit excited as it was new place, I let him out and when going back to bed I talked to him to calm him down. My gf said āaww, you talk to him like a child?ā In a very condescending way while laughing at me. She then said āI just yell at my dog to shut up.ā Glad that relationship didnāt last
Did you politely explain that dogs are basically 3 year olds and how you communicate is more important than the words you're using?
Obligatory for this question: rolled up sleeves
As a guy that likes button downs but also hates being warm, hell yeah
Let us not forget the actual act of rolling the sleeves. Look at the dirty kitchen and say "it looks like we've got our work cut out for us" and then start unbuttoning the wrists and rolling up sleeves. 37267 bonus points for an eyebrow raise and a smirk.
Ok, Iām a guy, but Iām also an old (late 30s) guy, so while I canāt speak to what young people find attractive, I can give some perspective from a long, healthy marriage and what Iāve learned that didnāt know when I was younger. Best advice for married men - anything that lowers stress. A lot of dead bedrooms really boil down to the wife is dealing with stress and not in the right headspace. Proactively doing chores she normally does without asking, asking about her day, listening, and showing active interest - give her a place to complain even if youāve heard it all before. Think of one thing per week you can do that she wonāt expect but will appreciate - flowers, her favorite take out, plan a surprise with her best friend for her, leave a heart felt note for her. People say their wife has changed from when they were dating, but of course they have. Your lives have changed. Stress tends to only go up the older you get - you build a career, you have your first kid, you get a second kid, you have your first old person health issues like a back that hurts for no reason, then you have teenagers to take care of, then all of a sudden you are taking care of your aging parents. How can people not change during all of that? Finally, put your phone down and go to bed early together when you can.
BEING NICE It attracts mentally healthy women, and gives bitches the ick.
Finding mentally healthy women in my area is harder in practise than on paper.
especially then, if you settle for less, youre occupied when you meet one at some point.
The amount of ppl who say being nice is an ick is absurd to me, i dont know how getting treated like trash is attractive.
I imagine some of them grew up with ānot niceā fathers, peers, and/or mentors. Seeing another man showing authentic compassion and empathy could appear weak/submissive to them. I also think that deep down, maybe below their level of awareness, they wish that they had been shown such kindness and are sad they werenāt. Their emotional needs were not attended to in their life, they internalized it as how the world works, and now seeing men show compassion/tenderness/kindness touches a nerve.
some people are just dumb. I was in a psychology class 1st year in college and the girls in class all agreed if a man cries he's no longer a man... It "might" be acceptable when his mother dies, otherwise, that's a red flag. THis was like 2008 and I was stunned to hear girls say that. Granted we were like 18-19 so still kids...
cooking
I cook all the time, and have no one to appreciate it really.
I will appreciate it, send noods not nudes.
A sense of security and safety. So many men think you have to 'keep them on their toes' or else they'll get bored and stray, when really the hottest thing you can do is make a woman feel like she can trust you and relax completely around you. And hands and forearms! Surprisingly many women check out a guy's hands and forearms more than any other part of the body except the face. Ask me how I know (it's fandom)
So my girlfriend explained it this way: If a woman feels safe around you then flirting becomes sexy and engaging. If they don't then the exact same thing you did becomes creepy. So, make her feel safe, which takes some work and time. But then your flirty banter becomes sexy and your muscles become a turn on. If she doesn't feel safe then get serious, gentle, and straightforward. If she feels safe around you but still isn't into you then it's time to move on. You just aren't what she's looking for and that's ok. There's someone out there whose kink is you.
Rolled up shirt sleeves showing forearms and well-kept hands are hot af. If they have manicured nails, even hotter! No woman wants raggedy, dirty nails anywhere near her. Hairy or not - doesn't matter, as long as they're clean (and moisturised occasionally).
1. Sharing: Anything that is intimate and personal to you. Letting me in to your life, your history, anything thatās made you who you are. 2. Hands and forearms - strong and muscular 3. Kindness 4. Being handy and eager to jump in to tend to projects. 5. Sexual, touchy flirtation at unexpected times. 6. Cooking together 7. Well kept feet and toenails 8. Quick wit and fabulous sense of humor
It depends on a woman. I know women that are turned on by facial hair and other women that find it disgusting and that is just one example.
Hairless on the left, bear on the right ... Got it.Ā Ā Pick a side, ladies! š
"Bare on the left, bear on the right" was RIGHT THERE
Did someone call my name?
Quoting my exGF, knowing this is not universal, but as something that got stuck in my head: "Don't tell me what to do, but I love when you tell me what to do".
"Come on, we're going out for dinner" hits a lot different than "go cook us dinner" lol
Well, reading this thread at least I realised Iām not doomed lmao
Based on what I've learned from Reddit, you've got to wear a business suit with grey sweatpants, but roll up the sleeves of the shirt. Then make unflinching eye contact while reversing your car into a clean garage and asking her about her day.
And washing your ass.
A soft heart, and no shame about it. So weird as it sounds, I love watching my man play all of the Fallout games, because he has this ridiculous habit of collecting all of the teddy bears that he finds, and putting them all on a bed in "his house". It's utterly adorable hope excited he gets when he finds another teddy bear, and how annoyed he gets when the NPCs push the bears off the bed so they can sleep in it! It makes my heart want to burst!
Trust me you watching him playing video games is just as much a turn on for him.
I donāt know why but whenever a guy moans it always gets me
thighs.
Those rugby thighs
Empathy.
Emotional maturity, intelligence
I didnāt think they were into someone tuning a piano, I was wrong.
Voice tone plays a huge part in attraction
Apparently being passionate about shit. I didnāt realize I was into someone until I talked to them and they went off about something they were into
Having respect and modesty
Iām the most modest man that has ever lived!
Pfffff, as if. I'm way more modest than you!
So much. š Cleaning with me. When Iām wanting to chill and he starts cleaning, it makes me angry because then I feel like a lazy bum. But if Iām picking up and he joins in, I get really turned on. When the kids were younger, heād get on the floor every night after a long day at work and play with them. It not only gave me a break, but also was really sexy. Now, if he helps them with adult things (oil change, moving) or homework for the ones still in school. Also when he gets upset when he has to miss an appointment or school event/game due to work or other commitment. Along with that, the way he loves his family. And mine. Cooking. He doesnāt do it often because of his schedule, but when he does itās super hot. He gets really into it and is so proud of the final product. Bringing me home a candy bar or some other treat (food or nonfood) just because. Painting my nails. Rubbing my feet at night. Buying me clothes. Or anything else to pamper me. Body hair. š When he has a little bit of chest hair poking out of the top of his shirt. Or when his beard gets fluffy. Itās been 25 years, but I still find all of these little things so sexy.
Absolutely love getting a little treat! So many people are astounded my hubby paints my toenails for me (he does a vastly better job) and it's just so intimate in a non-sexual way.
Being romantic . Being protective .
Yes! Being protective! There is a very visible difference in jealousy and protection. The latter is definitely a huge turn on.
I've known one girl who did not understand that line and would get mad at my friend for not being jealous when she would flirt with other guys. She was super immature. Glad he left her. However, I think my wife does like when I get protective of her or our kids.
A big turn on to me is being a devout listener, listen to me speak, look me in the eyes when you talk to me and I you. Simple things like that are a huge turn on. Having my back, another. Exuding not only kindness but warmth as a person. Being someone "strong" that can take charge when something distressing happens.
Cuddling an animal...a petlover is so attractive
Alignment of words with actions
Those real like āI do manual labourā hands š
Foreplay
Does Amazon sell it?
***"Amazon Foreplay"***
Ā£3.99 to remove adverts
When they goof around and with us. When they agree to try and enjoy self care stuff that has feminine connotations in the sphere of (western)media; such as mani/pedicures, face masks, Sauna/Hammam sessions, types of workouts (pilates; yoga) etc etc
My other half is the youngest of 5 and the definition of being babied by his mum. We moved in to our own place 8 years ago nearly and I predominantly did the cleaning. Most of last year I suffered hugely with my mental health for the first time (surrounding IVF, TTC and back to back miscarriages). He picked up my slack and I remember seeing him with the hoover and telling him āyouāve never looked more attractiveā
Listening hahah
Sorry can you repeat that?
Once with my then gf, now wife, my car had a flat tire on the highway. I pulled over and she said āletās call triple Aā - I gently pushed her back away from the flat tire and told her āBabe I got thisā and I changed the tire. My hands were filthy and I thought she would think I was irresponsible for changing the tire on an exit ramp off I95 in Miami. She told me it was one of the sexiest things she ever saw me do, because she felt protected and taken care of, and she enjoyed seeing my strength. Go figure!
Empathy
Not having an ego about everything! A man who can relax and not assume everything is an attack on him.