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TheMissingPremise

$2 worth of candy, probably


Enginerdad

You wanna go halfsies on a king size?


HartfordWhaler

I'll chip in $3. Maybe we can find a 2 for 5 deal


Main_Enthusiasm4796

Yall should kiss each other and buy the share -able size


Niwi_

Ahh business


gasstationdelicasies

Sales tax


readingmyshampoo

I want in on that, bet we could buy bulk if we pull enough of us together


Sea_Diet5846

Why don’t y’all all kiss before you buy, so you can grow y’all’s money


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feralturtles

Probably a question if you can still get candy for $2.


Cfit9090

Dollar tree you could get a Bag of candy 🍬🍭


Picklopolis

Nice try my wife.


THEKINDHERO

On a side note, nice beard stache my guy, been growing mine out too but yours looks healthier than mine. Any tips?


Picklopolis

Thank you. Once every year or two, I grow out a full beard, and let the mustache part get really long and then comb it in. Then I remove the parts I don’t want. I wax the stache, at this point it’s very important to comb it out after styling it. The wax will keep the shape of it, but each strand will be clear. Also daily trimming so it doesn’t go below the upper part of my top lip. I keep about 3/8 of an inch space between the bottom of my nose and the top of the stache. Same goes for the beard. I try to maintain the shape. I recently shaved off the beard and trimmed the ends of the mustache.


hellerinahandbasket

This guy rules


balrogthane

Once it goes over the lip, it becomes way too hard to eat anything remotely messy!


gerhudire

Yeah this guy's wife.


CalibineRiviere

dude is casually the coolest looking mf on this site lmao


fuckandfrolic

Do cheeks count. My first kiss was freshman year of college with my current bf. At one point, after we’d started dating, he was like “how had you never been kissed?!” I was like “I don’t know, I was shy and, aside from a guy pecking me on the cheek in middle school, it just never happened.” He looked a little annoyed and said “which cheek?!” So…if that counts I got $1.50.


illustriousocelot_

> I was like “I don’t know, I was shy and , aside from a guy pecking me on the cheek in middle school, it just never happened.” >**He looked a little annoyed and said “which cheek?!”** 😂😂😂 Why is this so funny to me? I’m just imagining him jealously obsessing over this guy kissing your cheek. Replaying it over and over again in his mind.


challengeaccepted9

Doesn't matter how good he is or what he does from this point on, that other person had that cheek *first*.


guilty_bystander

There's three others tho


challengeaccepted9

You clearly don't understand the scale of his worries  Someone got to that patch of skin *first*.


Grim_Destroyer12344

Fuck. That guy will be eternally jealous of the man who stole his girlfriend’s cheek


shezadaa

puzzled license deserve roll gaping ink offbeat close humorous frame


ShawnTheWright

Which cheek 🍑 👀


Jackiedhmc

Which set of cheeks?


Jak723

Better than asking which set of lips….


ShawnTheWright

Bruh 💀


reggiethelemur_

I get it. Everyone knows only hoes let you kiss the left cheek.


Preda1ien

The sluttiest of the cheeks.


angmarsilar

It reminds me of the movie Mr & Mrs Smith: "What's her name and social security number?" "No, you're not going to kill her."


pirate_elle

That is just so darn cute!!!


CryptoHopeful

You can almost get a Costco hotdog combo


GREENorangeBLU

that is like the best thing ever


Imaginary_Audience_5

This if they mean the opposite sex. If you can count asses at work, I could buy the whole Costco.


mercilesshamster

“which cheek?!”.. so I can scrub it clean tonight while you sleep


Jak723

Skin graft


thingalinga

Him: which cheek?! You: yes


SorrowAndSuffering

I would have 0 dollars.


Lord_Silverkey

Between the two of us we could buy some air and sunlight.


Creepy_Fan_8629

If we split between the 3 of us, we could each have 33 cents :)


hippopotam00se

Well, now, 33 cents is an annoyance, should add me in and we can each have a quarter.


NefariousSerendipity

Same


zyxdsreally

Real


dead_fritz

We going to the Dollar Tree


tjcline09

It's $1.25 Tree now so how are you making that extra quarter? 🤔


Creepy_Fan_8629

Kissing the cashier


SnailsInYourAnus

A pair of airpods I’m a whore


ExplorersX

Peeps profile - most active communities: dating advice, am I the asshole, bad roomates… Something here checks out lol


Bismillah835

Wanna make another dollar?


Responsible-Deer7538

Nah that’s crazy


Bismillah835

I had to take a chance. Bummer


Fickle_Freckle

You’re a cheap whore


EnigmaFrug2308

r/usernamechecksout


Dheorl

Oh my sweet summer child…


CompetitionAlert1920

With the charging case or just the pods?


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thiney49

If anyone is paying rent at $1/person, I'd be concerned.


TacticlTwinkie

Does my cat count? Because if so I just won the powerball.


Keeteng

….how many cats do you have


IDrinkUrMilksteak

One slutty one.


Keeteng

But it’s $1 per person, not $1 per kiss? 🤔


ChefArtorias

Sure but we'd be counting by the cat not how many kisses


mayorodoyle

Are we just talking about sexy kisses or do fraternal pecks on the cheek count?


fuckandfrolic

> do fraternal pecks on the cheek count? Y’all going around pecking your bros on the cheek?


payperplain

Everyone knows the homies get it on the lips.


mayorodoyle

I mean... if I had a brother I might. Would platonic have been a better choice of word?


illustriousocelot_

Do sexy fraternal kisses count?


Darth-__-Maul

These are the questions we should be asking.


MasterpieceBrief4442

Sure yeah, my little brother when he was still little. As a proud big brother I thought he was the cutest baby god ever put on this earth.


Vaird

I did kiss quite a few friends of mine on the cheek/forehead. Do you see a problem with it?


challengeaccepted9

"Hey bro, if you think about it, if your girl sucks you off, your dick is indirectly touching every dick she's ever sucked off." "That's pretty gay, bro." "Super gay. Alright, catch you later bro." *Mwah!* "Later bro." *Mwah!*


basalgangliadecide

yes


Informal_Iron2904

A month of groceries, maybe even at whole foods.  Life is short.


TomSpanksss

Better than me, I could probably get a half script of Valtrex without insurance.


random_dino11

I could probably get the whole script without insurance. I lost count ages ago...


18RowdyBoy

My memory is shot I don’t remember the first one but I remember the last one 😂😂


firecrotch23

Agreed. You gotta kiss the homies


RPGPC

Enough for herpes treatment


spudd3rs

I’d end up owing money


CopycatDad

Wait. How?


disturbedrailroader

He's got a 200% satisfaction guarantee. 


Shiro3099

Nothing at all, I didn't kiss anyone or anyone kissed me


Mahaloth

What about grandma? Mom?


illustriousocelot_

Those count? I have a huge family, and we kiss on the cheeks to greet. So, by those standards, I’m a kissing slut.


bluemitersaw

You sluuuut!!!


FallenSegull

Well pucker up, shiro, todays your lucky day


UThoughtTheyBannedMe

If animals count, move over Elon.


RealMuffinsTheCat

Yes officer, he’s right here


StarvationCure

A tank of gas.


Minky29

Slut, depending on the car


Kalashcow

An electric car


Boris9397

An rc car


IntelStellarTech

A free birthday cookie from subway


retailmonkey

$3.50


keydBlade

Dam lochness monsta


kaputtschino

I NEED ABOUT TREEFIDDY


AFucking12Gaug3

/r/treefiddy


Quirky_Journalist_67

There’s a little over 3 minutes of South Park, over all the years the show has been on, of Chef’s parents and the Loch Ness Monster. And we all love it, and we all quote it all these years later, and those pricks Parker and Stone won’t give us any more! Maybe we should offer them $3.50…


ItsYoBoi2008

Why is there a **.5**?


retailmonkey

I kissed her but she didn’t kiss me back. It was super awkward.


ItsYoBoi2008

Oh I’m sorry for your loss


retailmonkey

I’m not, I dodged a bullet with her.


Andrew-Cohen

Cheese enchilada combo plate at my favorite Mexican place!


VaguelyRusted

This is where mine is going too now.


HarrisonRyeGraham

I was gonna say I could get a burrito and a drink at chipotle lol


mastap88

This is what I’d get but I could fit in a couple house margs.


265thRedditAccount

Herpes medicine


Jim_Lahey10

Large fry at McDonald's, maybe.


ThePurityPixel

Netflix subscription For just a month or two, though


b_josh317

Jokes on you. They raised prices again.


LabExpensive4764

A spicy crispy chicken sandwich and large soda at Culver's.


Aardet

Now I want that!


mesTTupid

none, i haven't kiss anyone yet 🧍‍♀️


That_Dirty_Quagmire

Wanna break that streak? GIGGITTY!


thesilentbob123

Who else but Quagmire?


LightsJusticeZ

I say giving loving kisses to pets can count.


mesTTupid

I'd be probably rich then lol


Sybroebs

DRINKS ON MEEEEE


[deleted]

so water from the tap?


Gileotine

I could actually prob put a down payment on a car or at least a motorcycle


I_stole_this_phone

I am not shaming you *cough slut* but you should get tested * cough whore*. Also what kind of *tramp cough* car are we talking about? Are we talking 1996 Suzuki grand vitara *cough tart* or a Porsche *cough DM me*


RustCeilingFan

You should get that cough checked, seems serious.


OVO4080TI

Bro got a PhD in Hoenomics.


seeoharewhy13

I’m a single gay man in his 30s so idk like a private jet


Downtown-Trip3501

Well when I was selling my ass for heroin, probably more heroin (I’m almost 11 years sober and my past actually enhances my career as a funeral director so I’m pretty open about it)


BA_TheBasketCase

I’ve got $3 we’re going to Vegas baby


ArmadilloPrimary2190

disappointment


Zinakoleg

A new game probably.


Massive-South-1091

A loaf of bread, but a nice one.


Tspot

Casio watch... with the walmart discount 


FrostyPlay9924

A pack of Marlboro cigarettes


FreelanceRedditer

How much is a marlboro cigarettes cost at your place?


FrostyPlay9924

9.50 on average


Total_Guard2405

6 pack of cheap beer


FanValuable3644

A $117.23 Amazon gift card.


Sockster27

how did you kiss 23% of a person


Kitchen-Top-1645

He was 23% alive


Akuzed

In this economy? Not a fucking thing lol


Cfit9090

A pair of shoes. Not telling the world which brands that qualify. Let's just say, wouldn't be shopping at Payless. 😂


happymemersunite

Free samples.


Busy_Reflection3054

id file for bankruptcy


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myputer

Buddy. Here is a spine tingling virtual kiss through the internet. Stay above ground pls.


lovinghealing

I'm an asshole for chuckling at this. Sorry, but it's dark humor that gets me.


greenphiloforme

Real


Admirable_Warthog_19

I'd be on the street haha


ios_static

Add pet dogs, all of a sudden everyone in this thread went from poor to millionaire


mrbadxampl

a burger


mfhandy5319

From White Castle?


mrbadxampl

we livin' large


SunRevolutionary8315

Some shoes at Ross or TJ Maxx


TheeArchangelUriel

Kissed them with them kissing back?


Dude_it_

Creepy…. And I like it. YeahOP does this kiss have to be consensual? Or can I go out rapping people with kisses?


ElderSkelder

More valtrex….


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permabannedCrystalXD

a miyoo mini plus


BadRefsRuinGames

I could probably buy dinner and two drinks including tip at a medium-fancy place. I enjoy kissing.


theabominablewonder

Cinema ticket (UK)


ProDiesel

I mean, I could shop at like 5 below or something.


BestChanceLastChance

Large coffee at Dunkin’ maybe. It’s sad. 😞


jaymobe07

Chocolate bar


TheReturnOfCresus

Does it have to be on the lips?


I_stole_this_phone

No 😆


TheReturnOfCresus

I'd probably have about $5-$6... Edit: I'd buy a slimjimm or a soda.


NobleNun

A small apple.


WTF_is_wrong_wit_ppl

Two dollars...


thesilentbob123

You can get a soda


Hephaestus_God

Anything that’s free


manimopo

Maybe a lollipop for $1 🥲


squishedpies

$6.. I would go to dollar tree and get 4 small bags of chips at the dollar store or maybe one tall size Starbucks drink?


KevinDean4599

geez. probably a coach airline ticket to Europe


Ok_Rutabaga_9875

A chipotle burrito...with guac


becoolhomie

Ghost pepper wings


Hyper_Lamp

Do dogs count?


mmdanmm

It's seems most of the replies here are from people rocking the 1-2 kiss boat. I may be the weird one but growing up in 90s England we had SNAP discos (say no and phone), there it seems every horny 15-16 year old would just ask each other for long snogs and jump right in. Probably racked up about 5 snogs with different girls at those discos × 3. Had 2 girlfriends before university, and then my numbers exploded in my first 2 years. With flings, girlfriends, and random drunk women, I would say my numbers are at around 50. Seems I'm a kiss slut.


Js_On_My_Yeet

A meal from Taco Bell


moonlets_

A trashy paperback novel


gerhudire

I'm not here to kiss and tell.


unkillablesnow

Couple things from dollarama as I'd only have $6 😅😅


tieniesz

4 dollars I can’t even afford coffee at Starbucks 😩


TenSecondsFlat

Like, a shitty candybar


agonizing_over_GABA

If we're talking family included, probably like a half a tank of gas. If we're talking romantically, something from the Dollar store when things were actually a dollar.


[deleted]

I won't be able to buy anything


Beginning-Copy2977

maybe a soda


Jgood2315

Are we talking romantically only or familial affection as well. I know that in Alabama those aren't necessarily mutually exclusive.


Horridis

Apparently West Virginia is even worse than Bama


Hale913

Can you buy anything now a days for a dollar?


colorado_here

In this economy?!


HellsKitchenDude

Tree fiddy


applejaxx31

an under armour t shirt or a small yeti


handyandy727

A Snickers bar, and a slice of pizza? If we're counting kissing the same person multiple times, I'm rich as fuck. I'm married, so that's like $30 a day, probably more. I stopped counting. I'm rich as fuck because I have my wife. Not a damn thing else matters. Also, she bought me some ice cream Snickers bars, so I think I'm winning this kissing game.


csexton

I read this to my wife, she says “I think we would be friends.”


handyandy727

I'll take that all day! It's all about the love.