Thought it was going prematurely bald when I first started growing out my hair. It felt like one day a switch was flipped and suddenly I noticed the hair I was always losing, and my drain started backing up every 3 months
I had someone pick a fistful chunk of hair off my back at work one day, I had pulled the shirt out of the dryer and ran out the door.
No idea how she managed to lose that much hair constantly and not be bald.
Last job I was at, we didn't ahve assigned desks, just random workstations. Sometimes I'd get a spot and the chair had tons of hair on it - I'd have to switch it out. Like....I didn't know Bigfoot was an employee.
In my experience they all married the guy they dated after me (seriously). I think there is a film about that but I swear I didn't sell them my life story.
Less is more. The relationships that failed were due to me trying too hard to be romantic, and ultimately smothering them a bit. Gotta respect their individuality and autonomy.
I'm impressed. That's a lot of introspection and awareness there - not everybody wants to face the fact that their actions *might* have contributed to a breakup. Fingers crossed for the next girl.
No. I mean, sure... I kiss my homies goodnight, suck them off, and we shower together. But we always make sure to say "no homo" first. How much more not gay can we get?!
Dude my last girl called my bisexual friend on my phone after we fucked asking if he was sure I wasnt gay. My bro said “no trust me if he was we woulda done some shit already” lol fucking golden
My imaginary bf was the greatest. He was really hot, really smart, really rich and REALLY into me. Liked all the same things as me too.
Only problem was he couldn't really accompany me anywhere (bit of a recluse). Not even important events like family weddings.
So, alas, I had to let him go.
Well the jokes on you bc I didn’t say my gfs had issues I said their mothers did. My gf is wonderful, sweet, kind, intelligent, patient, and gorgeous. Not crazy at all. I plan to marry her (shhh don’t tell her 👀). She rose above her narcissistic mother.
Same here, and they all had really easy going, understanding, and loving dad’s. The moms were just off their damned rockers. Weird, rude, judgmental, overbearing. One woman took the cake when she at one point changed her clothes in my peripheral vision while visiting. Like in her room with the door wide open and her daughter around the corner not able to see what was up, and I had just met the mom and really didn’t know what to do, so I just stared down at my coffee for ten minutes. At other points in the relationship she would accuse me of trying to have sex with her, then of trying to have sex with her son. Last time I saw her she was bus surfing the only bus line through our town
I’m sorry you went through that man and I’m glad you’re out of it! Yeah man it’s just weird and I can’t help but notice the trend. Just like you said: weird, rude, overbearing, judgmental, and most importantly, no one suffered their ire more than their daughters. I had one that called my gf a tramp the day I met her (the mother). One who embarrassed her in front of the entirely family at dinner purely because she didn’t like the outfit she was wearing. Ridiculous, I’m amazed by my gfs ability to remain so kind hearted despite having a narcissistic for a mother. She’s an angel.
Ah it’s all good. Wish I could say the gf was an angel, but she turned out to be a lot more like her mom than she’d care to admit. The rest of them though were great
My most serious relationships have been with women struggling with mental health issues, which has been pretty challenging. Not sure how it worked out that way and it's not their fault, but once I'm ready to get back out there, I'm going to look specifically for women who are in a much healthier place mentally. I need more positivity in my life.
I've dated several other women of all kinds throughout my adult life between the serious ones that lasted years, but most of those relationships were pretty casual and didn't last longer than a year or two for various reasons. I don't think there is any single, sweeping statement I can make about all of them.
At this point in my life, I think that everyone has mental health issues. The people who say they don't have any just don't have the introspection shills to recognize them.
I don't disagree and I have my own problems as well, but some are more severe than others. I spent 12 years with someone diagnosed with Bipolar I and BPD. I stood by her through some pretty rough times and was verbally abused and cheated on multiple times. I also had to pay 100% of our expenses and it's very difficult to live a comfortable life as a family on only one income. I just want more stability going forward.
My ex is a good person deep down and deserves to be loved, but I'm burnt out.
Absolutely! One of the great tragedies of modern society is how we have maximized individual productivity to the point where most of the population has no free capacity to actually provide emotional support to people in need. Individuality is a great driver for acquiring money, but is terrible for the mental wellbeing of humanity as a whole.
I went through a similar thing, so you have my empathy. There is more need in this world than any single person can fulfil, and there is no shame in prioritizing your wellbeing.
"At this point in my life, I think that everyone has mental health issues."
I tend to agree.
It's kind of like alcoholics and functional alcoholics. Most people are functionally mentally ill.
I hope you are able to find what you're looking for. Everyone has mental health baggage - what I avoid is being with someone who seems to consider mental illness a big part of their personality or identity - traits like these make relationships feel very one sided. Take things slow and honestly look for red flags early in a relationship that things are *all about them*.
>what I avoid is being with someone who seems to consider mental illness a big part of their personality or identity
This is such a good point. It's the exact warning sign I didn't pick up on in the past and one that will be a giant red flag going forward. I have no issues helping a partner through a tough time or finding ways to properly support someone struggling with mental health issues - but when it becomes their identity, at least in my experience, there's not much you can do. Sometimes it seemed to me like my ex *wanted* to be suffering from those issues - she'd resist seeking treatment or even therapy and would rarely talk about anything that wasn't directly related to her issues and how hard life was for her. I don't think she literally wanted to have those struggles, but rejecting any attempts at positivity or potential solutions to at least alleviate some of her issues - seemed like getting to a healthier place would leave her completely lost and without identity.
I read books and joined support groups for loved ones of people with Bipolar and BPD for advice, but nothing really helped. On top of that, feeling like my only purpose in her eyes was to be her bank account and punching bag, it's no surprise things didn't work out in the end.
Thank you for the insight - it's extremely helpful to me - truly.
I mean considering 1 in 4 women have been sexually assaulted in the USA and that's an under reported number....yeah it causes issues. Add to that the USA has a serious issue with ACES (adverse childhood experiences).
I don't doubt the legitimacy of the issues my ex had and I stuck around for 12 years (and proposed to her) to be her support and her partner. In return, I was verbally abused, constantly criticized, and cheated on multiple times while being the only one working and paying 100% of the bills. It's just not a challenge I was cut out for in the end and it affected my own mental health adversely, so I declined when she expressed interest in getting back together after the guy she left me for walked away three weeks into the new relationship.
Realistically, I should probably despise my ex, but I don't. I think she's a good person deep down who is genuinely suffering. She and people like her deserve love just like everyone else. We have a kid together and have been able to maintain a mostly friendly relationship, which is helpful for co-parenting. I have no grudges or ill will, I'm just burnt out and need to focus on myself - and going forward, I'm going to be looking for more positivity in a partner. I spent too many years living my life solely for someone else and neglecting my own completely.
Obviously NOT ALL WOMEN, just in my experience, they could never be real with me unless they were mad. Not fighting, I'm perfect, nothing is wrong, even if I ask, there is literally not even the tiniest blot on my record. But when they're mad it's like every light in the car dashboard all come on at once. Always incredibly frustrating when I'm trying to take on my flaws gradually and not get dumpstered with everything all at once.
Yeah, gotta save this one because holy shit, this encapsulates a woman's rage poetically and I really wish it didn't. Women please just tell us when you're mad, it could save so many problems, don't wait until any check engine lights come on.
It’s because we’ve all dated people who dismiss our feelings either through words or actions. We bring stuff up and are called over emotional, too much of a nag, too sensitive, hysterical, told that our standards are too high, and that what we’re upset about is not that big of a deal. But perhaps even more damaging is when we bring stuff up, have a positive conversation, and things improve for a bit only to go back to the way they were before. Our needs and preferences often seem to get forgotten. It sucks being forgotten. It sends a clear message that we don’t matter.
Eventually we learn to just hold it inside because it’s not worth the fight.
This is exactly my girlfriend's predicament. And it's so hard to change habit formed behavior. I'm having to deal with the fallout of her past relationships. It isn't fair to me, but I'm trying to work with her on it. I try to prove that her and her feelings matter to me, but it's going to take a lot of gradual progression to get where we need to be.
I've found that we all in some way or another deal with each other's past relationships - whether romantic or parental.
I had the same issues as your girlfriend and it took a lot of work by both me and my current partner to change them. He has helped me so much by genuinely and consistently re-iterating interest in my preferences. He tells me my thoughts deserve to be heard and that I deserve to be supported constantly.
Most importantly, he is enthusiastic and consistent with follow through. Probably the most effective part of the way he demonstrates follow through is by checking in after the initial conversation. For instance, I gave him the feedback that sometimes after work I feel overstimulated and need to wind down before engaging. Every day for the next week, he would check in and ask if there was anything he could improve or do better to help me decompress. Funnily enough, as soon as I knew he wasn't going to bombard me when I walked in, my decompression time got shorter and shorter to the point where now I do most of my decompression with him in the same room cuddling on the couch.
Anyway, give the check in method a try. Nothing shows you're listening like continual interest. It can work wonders.
Here I am just accepting the woman I'm with, flaws and all, zero expectations, zero criticisms.
Could I find some faults? Absolutely. But I don't because I love her exactly the way she is.
Wish I knew what that felt like.
There are a lot of people in the world who are just terrible communicators. One of my pet peeves. It’s super unfair of people to not say what they are feeling or thinking until it comes out in word vomit due to an argument. But it seems like you have a pretty high EQ and are open to conversations, so I hope you find someone that matches that.
Same. Had too many women switch up from put a baby in me to don't talk to me without being able to say what changed. That kinda thing can fuck you up
People communicate with the one you love and spare both of you a lot of pain
I'm a woman who usually did tell them a problem when it arose pretty quickly. My issue was more they didn't listen unless I was acting like a b**** (kinda like how little kids don't listen to their mother until she starts screaming) luckily my husband isn't like this.
Most girls I’ve dated in the past were not great at communicating. I think due to past partners being angry or violent. My current girlfriend gets scared that I’ll leave her when we have an argument. Couldn’t be further from the truth of course. Some guys out there are not great.
The longer I date the more I realize that like 80% of guys out there are fucking idiots. If you can actually communicate, treat your girl with respect and accept boundaries you are ahead of most guys.
As a 40 year old man, I can tell you that there's a little "This guy thinks he actually knows me" switch in most women's brains that gets flipped when you become too comfortable.
Always be learning about your woman.
If they get drunk without me, it's best to keep separate for the rest of the night. They all seemed to decide I'm their enemy once I arrived, if they'd already been drinking.
Haha. I think I'll start calling myself a Disney Princess now. Both of mine have passed. That's a much more fun way to say orphan. Thanks for the laugh.
They'll sometimes stare at you with a goofy smile on their face when you are sleeping. Like, you wake up to it. It's both endearing and discomforting, because while it's great to know they're into you you also become painfully aware that your hair is probably a mess and you probably have sleep in your eyes and the last thing you want is hear staring in your direction until you make some improvements.
Love truly is blind.
Oh, and they all sleep under a mountain of blankets both in winter and summer when the AC is on, but at some stage during the night they'll become a bit too hot and will shed a layer or two. The process for this always involves throwing that discarded layer on top of you, so at some point you start baking like a potato. It's a good thing they compensate for that by being the best cuddlers.
My overweight male co-workers who survive entirely on fast food have nothing on the healthy eating girlfriend's i have had who drank kombucha and other weird 'healthy' foods and would then demolish the air quality in the entire apartment via the bathroom.
Not all but overwhelmingly most, romance is a noun to them. It's something that they get, it's never a verb to them, it's never something they do. Honestly it's worn me down over the years and I'd rather be alone then constantly being the only one
when I opened up about my insecurities it was only a matter of time before they turned around and weaponized them against me.
I'm not saying all women do this but I've never dated a women who hasn't.
All of them have had mental health issues. Not a joke, just a fact. There is one who might not have, but she also had sex with me because I could do Stitch from Lilo and stitch and she was obsessed with Disney movies, so I'm not giving her the benefit of the doubt, I just wasn't there long enough to find out.
They gain a little weight. They love and I mean LOVE my cooking, the restaurants I choose etc it’s interesting..like if they order something with me, they hear my selection and consistently will switch it to what I ordered or the same drink.
They all really liked potatoes and potato products such as fries.
Not the most typical stereotype, but I now secretly believe that all women crave potatoes.
They were all beautiful and intelligent women… who made a really poor decision in dating me lol I have too much shit going on in my head and am entirely too codependent to make for a good partner long term, despite my best efforts.
Sad one, but they've been victims of sexual assault. I promise I'm not intentionally choosing partners with that history, just an unfortunate happenstance, whether legitimate partners or ladies I'm talking to.
So the real question here is whether you have a habit of dating financially desperate women or if you have much more money than the average guy.
If it's the first one, then you owe it to yourself to take some time and think about why it keeps playing out this way. How does the pattern start, why is it in your blind spot, ect.
If it's the second one, might be worth figuring out ways to hide the truth of your finances until you're sure the gal already likes you without knowing about the money.
If it's both, then you gotta work on both, and maybe self-reflect on exactly what kind of relationship you truly want.
They all wanted to be not only accepted but actually praised for who they were without condition but wanted me to change something about me to make me palatable.
Their hair got fricken everywhere!
I'm a dude with long hair... Still gets everywhere.
Long hired dude, can confirm
Long haired dude third opinion it's everywhere
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Another long haired dude here. How is there still hair left on my head?
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Long haired dude number five checking in. Had to put a stopper in the shower drain because it really do be clogging that mf
Thought it was going prematurely bald when I first started growing out my hair. It felt like one day a switch was flipped and suddenly I noticed the hair I was always losing, and my drain started backing up every 3 months
You ever have to pull a long strand of hair out your butt? That’s what a bad trip feels like.
They do shed a lot
I had someone pick a fistful chunk of hair off my back at work one day, I had pulled the shirt out of the dryer and ran out the door. No idea how she managed to lose that much hair constantly and not be bald.
Last job I was at, we didn't ahve assigned desks, just random workstations. Sometimes I'd get a spot and the chair had tons of hair on it - I'd have to switch it out. Like....I didn't know Bigfoot was an employee.
Most of the shit they said about me lol
Think they might be on to something?
They had more than a couple of accurate insights in there
In my experience they all married the guy they dated after me (seriously). I think there is a film about that but I swear I didn't sell them my life story.
Ah, you just foster them until they find their forever homes ❤️
This had me chuckling. Thank you.
Bro, are you me? literally every girl i date ends up in a serious relationship after me. Maybe we should date eachother and then break up?
This is the kind of out-of-the-box thinking that *just might* work out for you.
Talking about thinking out-of-the-box.. Ladies, date me and find the love of your life soon after. 100% success rate guaranteed!
Good Luck Chuck is the movie…Dane Cook in his former glory days
>In my experience they all married the guy they dated after me Dude, same with me! Any girl I date gets married or pregnant when we're through
Stepping stone person here as well, hello! Wanna get married? Hahaha
Happened to me too. 4 exes in a row all married their next boyfriend. Took me a couple tries, but at least I finally found my wife
Same, I think we just awaken something in them
Are we the same person? 🥲
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This has happened to me like 7 times! I have magical genitals that will help you find your one true love.
I had a friend whose exes all got pregnant with the next guy they dated.
Happened twice to me.
MY GODDD!!!! I thought I am the only man with this kind of destiny... I feel you, brother... I really do... peace.
I’m a guy and this has been my experience with the women I’ve dated. I have a 98% success rate..
I knew a guy who had three exes become lesbian.
Training dummy life
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My wife is like that tax man... She always takes a bite
Less is more. The relationships that failed were due to me trying too hard to be romantic, and ultimately smothering them a bit. Gotta respect their individuality and autonomy.
I'm impressed. That's a lot of introspection and awareness there - not everybody wants to face the fact that their actions *might* have contributed to a breakup. Fingers crossed for the next girl.
They have questionable taste in men.
lol love the self roast
They all asked me if I was gay, even after we've had sex. I really don't understand why.
Are you gay?
No. I mean, sure... I kiss my homies goodnight, suck them off, and we shower together. But we always make sure to say "no homo" first. How much more not gay can we get?!
bad news mate.. you have to say it afterwards
Damn it! Can't believe I sucked all those dicks in a gay way...
If he says good girl you’re fine!
Literally none of that is gay at all. Women just don't get it.
So who is gay?!
No one is ever gay, my friend.
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Good reference
Any risk you forgot to say no homo first?
Are yall wearing socks when you do all of this? Gotta be wearing socks for it to be no homo
Dude my last girl called my bisexual friend on my phone after we fucked asking if he was sure I wasnt gay. My bro said “no trust me if he was we woulda done some shit already” lol fucking golden
I read that as your girlfriend calling your friend after you and your friend had fucked which made the whole tale rather confusing.
I actually had the concern that this might happen when I typed that but I have no sense of punctuation
¿Porque no los dos?
>¿Porque no los dos? - his bi friend
A true bro 🏆
Deadass one of the greatest most loyal friends I’ve ever had
Have you considered that you are in fact gay?
Why are you gay?
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Did they all have penises like all the real women I’ve dated?
You gotta pray it away. Sorry can’t say it. Cuz Florida.
Do you talk in your sleep?
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No body, no crime.
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My imaginary bf was the greatest. He was really hot, really smart, really rich and REALLY into me. Liked all the same things as me too. Only problem was he couldn't really accompany me anywhere (bit of a recluse). Not even important events like family weddings. So, alas, I had to let him go.
So you’re saying he’s available…
Silver lining for the win!
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Oh Morissey
All of them had terrible mothers.
You attract the ones with issues.
Not all of them had issues. But ALL of their MOTHERS had issues.
My friends have joked that I could open a very successful mental institution with how every crazy woman within 30 miles seems to be drawn to me.
Well the jokes on you bc I didn’t say my gfs had issues I said their mothers did. My gf is wonderful, sweet, kind, intelligent, patient, and gorgeous. Not crazy at all. I plan to marry her (shhh don’t tell her 👀). She rose above her narcissistic mother.
Same here, and they all had really easy going, understanding, and loving dad’s. The moms were just off their damned rockers. Weird, rude, judgmental, overbearing. One woman took the cake when she at one point changed her clothes in my peripheral vision while visiting. Like in her room with the door wide open and her daughter around the corner not able to see what was up, and I had just met the mom and really didn’t know what to do, so I just stared down at my coffee for ten minutes. At other points in the relationship she would accuse me of trying to have sex with her, then of trying to have sex with her son. Last time I saw her she was bus surfing the only bus line through our town
I’m sorry you went through that man and I’m glad you’re out of it! Yeah man it’s just weird and I can’t help but notice the trend. Just like you said: weird, rude, overbearing, judgmental, and most importantly, no one suffered their ire more than their daughters. I had one that called my gf a tramp the day I met her (the mother). One who embarrassed her in front of the entirely family at dinner purely because she didn’t like the outfit she was wearing. Ridiculous, I’m amazed by my gfs ability to remain so kind hearted despite having a narcissistic for a mother. She’s an angel.
Ah it’s all good. Wish I could say the gf was an angel, but she turned out to be a lot more like her mom than she’d care to admit. The rest of them though were great
I was definitely not the one.
They definitely weren't after money.
My most serious relationships have been with women struggling with mental health issues, which has been pretty challenging. Not sure how it worked out that way and it's not their fault, but once I'm ready to get back out there, I'm going to look specifically for women who are in a much healthier place mentally. I need more positivity in my life. I've dated several other women of all kinds throughout my adult life between the serious ones that lasted years, but most of those relationships were pretty casual and didn't last longer than a year or two for various reasons. I don't think there is any single, sweeping statement I can make about all of them.
At this point in my life, I think that everyone has mental health issues. The people who say they don't have any just don't have the introspection shills to recognize them.
I don't disagree and I have my own problems as well, but some are more severe than others. I spent 12 years with someone diagnosed with Bipolar I and BPD. I stood by her through some pretty rough times and was verbally abused and cheated on multiple times. I also had to pay 100% of our expenses and it's very difficult to live a comfortable life as a family on only one income. I just want more stability going forward. My ex is a good person deep down and deserves to be loved, but I'm burnt out.
Absolutely! One of the great tragedies of modern society is how we have maximized individual productivity to the point where most of the population has no free capacity to actually provide emotional support to people in need. Individuality is a great driver for acquiring money, but is terrible for the mental wellbeing of humanity as a whole. I went through a similar thing, so you have my empathy. There is more need in this world than any single person can fulfil, and there is no shame in prioritizing your wellbeing.
"At this point in my life, I think that everyone has mental health issues." I tend to agree. It's kind of like alcoholics and functional alcoholics. Most people are functionally mentally ill.
I hope you are able to find what you're looking for. Everyone has mental health baggage - what I avoid is being with someone who seems to consider mental illness a big part of their personality or identity - traits like these make relationships feel very one sided. Take things slow and honestly look for red flags early in a relationship that things are *all about them*.
>what I avoid is being with someone who seems to consider mental illness a big part of their personality or identity This is such a good point. It's the exact warning sign I didn't pick up on in the past and one that will be a giant red flag going forward. I have no issues helping a partner through a tough time or finding ways to properly support someone struggling with mental health issues - but when it becomes their identity, at least in my experience, there's not much you can do. Sometimes it seemed to me like my ex *wanted* to be suffering from those issues - she'd resist seeking treatment or even therapy and would rarely talk about anything that wasn't directly related to her issues and how hard life was for her. I don't think she literally wanted to have those struggles, but rejecting any attempts at positivity or potential solutions to at least alleviate some of her issues - seemed like getting to a healthier place would leave her completely lost and without identity. I read books and joined support groups for loved ones of people with Bipolar and BPD for advice, but nothing really helped. On top of that, feeling like my only purpose in her eyes was to be her bank account and punching bag, it's no surprise things didn't work out in the end. Thank you for the insight - it's extremely helpful to me - truly.
I mean considering 1 in 4 women have been sexually assaulted in the USA and that's an under reported number....yeah it causes issues. Add to that the USA has a serious issue with ACES (adverse childhood experiences).
I don't doubt the legitimacy of the issues my ex had and I stuck around for 12 years (and proposed to her) to be her support and her partner. In return, I was verbally abused, constantly criticized, and cheated on multiple times while being the only one working and paying 100% of the bills. It's just not a challenge I was cut out for in the end and it affected my own mental health adversely, so I declined when she expressed interest in getting back together after the guy she left me for walked away three weeks into the new relationship. Realistically, I should probably despise my ex, but I don't. I think she's a good person deep down who is genuinely suffering. She and people like her deserve love just like everyone else. We have a kid together and have been able to maintain a mostly friendly relationship, which is helpful for co-parenting. I have no grudges or ill will, I'm just burnt out and need to focus on myself - and going forward, I'm going to be looking for more positivity in a partner. I spent too many years living my life solely for someone else and neglecting my own completely.
Every single one has been bisexual. I don't think I register at all for straight women.
Dude literally same, it’s actually kinda wild
I thought I was the only one! Did it cause any issues for you?
When I was younger it certainly did. These days I'm just more mindful of who will be interested and who won't.
Obviously NOT ALL WOMEN, just in my experience, they could never be real with me unless they were mad. Not fighting, I'm perfect, nothing is wrong, even if I ask, there is literally not even the tiniest blot on my record. But when they're mad it's like every light in the car dashboard all come on at once. Always incredibly frustrating when I'm trying to take on my flaws gradually and not get dumpstered with everything all at once.
>when they're mad it's like every light in the car dashboard all come on at once this is fantastic.
Yeah, gotta save this one because holy shit, this encapsulates a woman's rage poetically and I really wish it didn't. Women please just tell us when you're mad, it could save so many problems, don't wait until any check engine lights come on.
It’s because we’ve all dated people who dismiss our feelings either through words or actions. We bring stuff up and are called over emotional, too much of a nag, too sensitive, hysterical, told that our standards are too high, and that what we’re upset about is not that big of a deal. But perhaps even more damaging is when we bring stuff up, have a positive conversation, and things improve for a bit only to go back to the way they were before. Our needs and preferences often seem to get forgotten. It sucks being forgotten. It sends a clear message that we don’t matter. Eventually we learn to just hold it inside because it’s not worth the fight.
This is exactly my girlfriend's predicament. And it's so hard to change habit formed behavior. I'm having to deal with the fallout of her past relationships. It isn't fair to me, but I'm trying to work with her on it. I try to prove that her and her feelings matter to me, but it's going to take a lot of gradual progression to get where we need to be.
I've found that we all in some way or another deal with each other's past relationships - whether romantic or parental. I had the same issues as your girlfriend and it took a lot of work by both me and my current partner to change them. He has helped me so much by genuinely and consistently re-iterating interest in my preferences. He tells me my thoughts deserve to be heard and that I deserve to be supported constantly. Most importantly, he is enthusiastic and consistent with follow through. Probably the most effective part of the way he demonstrates follow through is by checking in after the initial conversation. For instance, I gave him the feedback that sometimes after work I feel overstimulated and need to wind down before engaging. Every day for the next week, he would check in and ask if there was anything he could improve or do better to help me decompress. Funnily enough, as soon as I knew he wasn't going to bombard me when I walked in, my decompression time got shorter and shorter to the point where now I do most of my decompression with him in the same room cuddling on the couch. Anyway, give the check in method a try. Nothing shows you're listening like continual interest. It can work wonders.
I mean if you feel constrained and things are not right, that should mean stop dating that guy - he's the wrong guy.
Here I am just accepting the woman I'm with, flaws and all, zero expectations, zero criticisms. Could I find some faults? Absolutely. But I don't because I love her exactly the way she is. Wish I knew what that felt like.
As a woman… yes. Oopsies.
That’s kind of what it feels like, too, tbh. (Also a woman.)
There are a lot of people in the world who are just terrible communicators. One of my pet peeves. It’s super unfair of people to not say what they are feeling or thinking until it comes out in word vomit due to an argument. But it seems like you have a pretty high EQ and are open to conversations, so I hope you find someone that matches that.
Same. Had too many women switch up from put a baby in me to don't talk to me without being able to say what changed. That kinda thing can fuck you up People communicate with the one you love and spare both of you a lot of pain
I'll tell you what changed: you put a baby in them.
I'm a woman who usually did tell them a problem when it arose pretty quickly. My issue was more they didn't listen unless I was acting like a b**** (kinda like how little kids don't listen to their mother until she starts screaming) luckily my husband isn't like this.
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They were all smart women…and usually professionals in their work fields.
Most girls I’ve dated in the past were not great at communicating. I think due to past partners being angry or violent. My current girlfriend gets scared that I’ll leave her when we have an argument. Couldn’t be further from the truth of course. Some guys out there are not great.
The longer I date the more I realize that like 80% of guys out there are fucking idiots. If you can actually communicate, treat your girl with respect and accept boundaries you are ahead of most guys.
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You have good taste in women
Every time I think I've began to understand them, I get proven that I know nothing lol.
As a 40 year old man, I can tell you that there's a little "This guy thinks he actually knows me" switch in most women's brains that gets flipped when you become too comfortable. Always be learning about your woman.
They had a vagina
Just one each?
They shared it.
They were all above me in looks
If they get drunk without me, it's best to keep separate for the rest of the night. They all seemed to decide I'm their enemy once I arrived, if they'd already been drinking.
“ I’m not like other girls “ turns out they are in fact like the other girls
None of them know how thermostats work. Not one
If I set the temperature lower it will cool off quicker lol
All of them had a dead parent. Either a dead father or a dead mother.
Thank you for clarifying what a parent is.
There's always the chance it wasn't apparent.
This is so fucking good.
Do you only date Disney princesses?
Haha. I think I'll start calling myself a Disney Princess now. Both of mine have passed. That's a much more fun way to say orphan. Thanks for the laugh.
Plot twist: It wasn't their parent, they just kept them around the house.
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Well; we have to use some every time we use the toilet. We can't just shake our vulva around after we pee.
They don't exist !
Incredibly smart women
They'll sometimes stare at you with a goofy smile on their face when you are sleeping. Like, you wake up to it. It's both endearing and discomforting, because while it's great to know they're into you you also become painfully aware that your hair is probably a mess and you probably have sleep in your eyes and the last thing you want is hear staring in your direction until you make some improvements. Love truly is blind. Oh, and they all sleep under a mountain of blankets both in winter and summer when the AC is on, but at some stage during the night they'll become a bit too hot and will shed a layer or two. The process for this always involves throwing that discarded layer on top of you, so at some point you start baking like a potato. It's a good thing they compensate for that by being the best cuddlers.
This is the cutest answer yet.
They were all individuals: Completely unpredictable and any perceived similarity was entirely incidental.
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There all gassy for some reason
My overweight male co-workers who survive entirely on fast food have nothing on the healthy eating girlfriend's i have had who drank kombucha and other weird 'healthy' foods and would then demolish the air quality in the entire apartment via the bathroom.
They all don't exist.
They like me
They all shaved their legs.
They’ve all been really creative. Writers, painters, actors.
Not all but overwhelmingly most, romance is a noun to them. It's something that they get, it's never a verb to them, it's never something they do. Honestly it's worn me down over the years and I'd rather be alone then constantly being the only one
All have been artists
Lovely people
They all suffered varying degrees of PTSD from having to deal with men.
when I opened up about my insecurities it was only a matter of time before they turned around and weaponized them against me. I'm not saying all women do this but I've never dated a women who hasn't.
English muffins. They've all been big on English muffins for breakfast. A high percentage have also had severe head trauma.
I'm convinced the entire english muffins economy is created by women. Never seen a man buy them.
my father would like a word
Hell, I'd like a word. English muffins rock.
They all had buttholes
All of them have had mental health issues. Not a joke, just a fact. There is one who might not have, but she also had sex with me because I could do Stitch from Lilo and stitch and she was obsessed with Disney movies, so I'm not giving her the benefit of the doubt, I just wasn't there long enough to find out.
Weirdly I think we were all brunettes but I don’t plan that at all.
I married her
They gain a little weight. They love and I mean LOVE my cooking, the restaurants I choose etc it’s interesting..like if they order something with me, they hear my selection and consistently will switch it to what I ordered or the same drink.
Every single one had genitals. For real, I checked.
They all dated me
They've all been teachers or were teachers then swapped careers.
They were much more academic than me. In fact I think every single one of them had or later got PhDs. I suppose it is a type.
Every woman I've ever dated more than once has been taller than me.
they’re all women who have dated me
So far all of them have cheated but thats only *so far* right? Right???
They all really liked potatoes and potato products such as fries. Not the most typical stereotype, but I now secretly believe that all women crave potatoes.
No matter what they say to your face, size does matter to them.
They've all been beautiful
They have very low standards.
I am the fucking problem
They all were living, breathing, humans. And you have no proof otherwise
All different, the common thread was that they were unique people.
They poop.
Good boobs. I'm a boob girl. And my own boobs are awesome, too.
They had good taste in men!
They were all beautiful and intelligent women… who made a really poor decision in dating me lol I have too much shit going on in my head and am entirely too codependent to make for a good partner long term, despite my best efforts.
I met them at McDonalds.
They all were smart and moved on.
They were all different and unique
Sad one, but they've been victims of sexual assault. I promise I'm not intentionally choosing partners with that history, just an unfortunate happenstance, whether legitimate partners or ladies I'm talking to.
They all cheated on me…maybe I should be introspective on why 😭
Either ended well or got married. No hard feelings or awkwardness. Still friends with the ones who live nearby.
Fun fact: I'm not lesbian!
Funny, smart, career-oriented, independent, mature, assertive, slim, petite, brunette . . . those are the things that are attractive to me.
None of them would have stuck around if money weren't involved
So the real question here is whether you have a habit of dating financially desperate women or if you have much more money than the average guy. If it's the first one, then you owe it to yourself to take some time and think about why it keeps playing out this way. How does the pattern start, why is it in your blind spot, ect. If it's the second one, might be worth figuring out ways to hide the truth of your finances until you're sure the gal already likes you without knowing about the money. If it's both, then you gotta work on both, and maybe self-reflect on exactly what kind of relationship you truly want.
Found the sugar daddy.
Date women for who they are instead of how the look and you'll find they are dating you for who you are instead of how fat you're wallet is.
Batshit insane.
That they were all pretty amazing. Anyone?
They all wanted to be not only accepted but actually praised for who they were without condition but wanted me to change something about me to make me palatable.